Annoying Jareth

62-63 - piracy, the good kind!

Jareth noticed a distinct lack of his things in his room. Shaking his head groggily he dressed and made his way downstairs. He paused as he walked down the hall, spying an empty spot on the wall where he was sure a mirror used to be. He looked up and down the hall mildly bewildered as he realised that it was completely empty. There were no mirrors, no ornaments, even the statues were gone. He pinched the bridge of his nose, sighing heavily. "This time I may just kill it".

It didn't take him long to find the Creature. He simply followed the trail of glittery destruction down into the goblin city. It was sitting aloft a pile of priceless valuables while prodding the hoarder goblins with sticks.

"No! These shineys are mine!" It screamed, causing at least three goblins to fall to the ground in agony as blood flowed from their ears. Jareth cringed, but quickly righted himself, crossing his arms over his chest. He cleared his throat.

"No I believe they are mine", he quirked a rather elongated eyebrow at the thing as it turned and stared at him.

"I think not my dear king, for I, Captain Rambler of the ship Derango have claimed these goods in the name of piracy." It lifted its fist in the air, posing quite surprisingly well atop the mountain of stuff.

"Did it have to be my stuff?" He asked not really wanting to know the answer.

"Well of course. As a rival captain and my sworn nemesis it was a natural course of action".

"Sworn nemesis... I see" he turned to leave. "Well enjoy the crap and keep your insanity to yourself."

He felt that the glove smacking his face was rather uncalled for. "Captain sparkly pants, I challenge you to a duel!"

"What the hell was that... Did you just call me sparkly pants?"

"We shall duel in the morn by the old oak tree in the field of posies!" With that it ran off laughing manically. Jareth wondered where this imaginary field was and was left with an unnerving feeling that it would be either the throne room or the Escher room.

Morning came with a feeling of dread. He quietly peeked around the corner to the throne room. Empty. And he meant empty. It was completely barren apart from the stone throne. Sighing he made his way to the Escher room. Again it was empty. So where exactly was this field supposed to be? He marched towards the massive entrance doors and heaved them open. He gaped at the field of posies before him.

"How…?" He saw the old man disappear round the corner and growled, "Damn that old man".

He sauntered out into the field and found the Creature there pretending to do warm up exercises while consuming large amounts of alcohol. 'This is going to be fun' he thought.

"So we're seeing this one through are we?" He smirked as smugly as possible.

The Creature looked at him. They stared hard at one another. Jareth quirked an eyebrow. The Creature quirked one back. "I'm sorry, we're doing what now?"

Jareth exploded. Red flowers rained down over the labyrinth for four days and five nights. Captain Rambler and Captain Sparklypants fought an epic duel over the precious booty, but only one could be the winner. Captain Rambler surveyed the damage and heaved a deep sigh.

I would continue this epic tale of Captain Rambler but unfortunately the rest of the book was set on fire.

A/N - It's been far too long