Thank you as always to naelany and wishingforlove.
Bella had a better understanding of Jasper's post-holiday moodiness after they returned from their week away. She had spent five glorious nights getting to share a bed with her lovers and it had been difficult to go back to her own when they got back – she couldn't imagine what it must've been like for Edward and Jasper to get through it after six weeks.
Thankfully, she'd had enough to do on Sunday to keep her mind immediately occupied. It didn't even really occur to her, until Alice crept into the room and snuggled up at 2 am, why she wasn't sleeping.
"You too, huh?" she asked Alice.
Alice hugged her. "I've missed sleeping next to someone. Even if Ang did accuse me of stealing the blankets."
Bella laughed. "Alice, honey, I hate to break it to you, but you do steal blankets.
Alice 'harumphed' her indignant response. "Well, I guess you won't have to worry about that anymore, hm?"
Bella hadn't really thought about that. "No, I guess not." She wouldn't have to spend vacations sharing a bed with Alice, since she'd have Edward and Jasper's.
"Y'know I'm happy for you all, right? Even if I come across as a little jealous sometimes."
Bella smiled into the dark. "Yeah, Ali, I know. But maybe Rose was right. It's been months since Kate…" she trailed off, biting her lip. Her next thought had been that if she got over James that surely Alice could be over Kate already. But she held her tongue.
"I'm going to see Charlotte in two weeks," Alice whispered.
"Who's Charlotte?" Bella asked, confused.
"I thought maybe you'd come with me? I know you don't want to be away from the boys that long, but we'd be back Sunday afternoon, and I thought maybe if I promised you a trip to Powell's that you might agree and" Alice's speech rolled on like a freight train until Bella finally clapped her hand over Alice's mouth to quiet her.
"Charlotte in Portland?" Bella asked, putting it together when Alice mentioned bribing her with books. "I thought it was just a fling, Alice?" She felt the smaller woman shrug against her.
"I thought so, too," Alice admitted. "But she found me on Facebook and invited me down in two weeks. I really like her, Bella. But I don't want to go by myself."
"I'll talk to Edward and Jasper and make sure we don't have plans if," she stressed, blindly poking at the squirmy thing in her bed. "You promise that you'll let me pay for half the hotel, since you won't be there anyway."
"I can live with that," Alice agreed, her voice calmer as she stopped wriggling around and snuggled against Bella. "Thank you."
"Aw, Alice, you know there's very little I can deny you. I love you too much."
"You too, Bells," Alice answered sleepily.
It seemed that with her issue handled, Alice was fast on her way to sleep. Bella as still have convinced she'd never sleep when Alice cuddled a little closer and Bella found herself comforted enough to doze, and then slip into a restful sleep.
When she awoke with her alarm at six-forty in the morning, Bella was alone in bed, which had been completely stripped of her blankets and comforter. "What the hell?" she muttered, then the metaphorical light clicked on. "ALICE!?"
Her impish suitemate appeared in the doorway, giggling, with Bella's bed coverings swaddled around and trailing her like haute couture. "What?" she asked innocently.
Bella just fixed her with a glare as she untangled herself from the lone sheet she'd apparently been trying to use for warmth.
"As long as I'm stealing covers, I thought I should do a thorough job," Alice suggested with a grin and shrug.
Bella finally extricated herself. "Just make sure you get the corners nice and tight when you remake it," Bella said as she grabbed her robe and towel from the hooks.
She pushed past Alice and flicked on the kettle before stepping into the bathroom. When she emerged from a very hot shower that soothed her muscles (but did nothing for the fact she missed Edward and Jasper after only a day), she found that Alice had made her a cup of her favorite tea, and her covers were back on her bed, though it was unmade.
After a quick peek outside and a check of the weather on her laptop, Bella chose her clothes for the day and started to dress. From her closet she pulled a light t-shirt dress that belted around her waist and paired it with a light denim jacket. The weather promised to be clear, so she added a cute pair of matching sandals, knowing she'd be able to stay inside most of the day, since Jasper would get their lunches like usual (she assumed).
She threw her hair up into a bun and secured it with a couple of long sticks before throwing her things into her bag and collecting Alice for breakfast. "Ready?" she asked, poking her head into Alice's side of the suite.
"Just about," Alice answered, stepping into her shoes. When she looked up, she made a face. "Bella, the hair," she sighed.
"I know," Bella answered. "I think I'm going to cut it soon. It's too long and heavy," she explained as Alice lifted her bag. They made their way out through Alice's door.
"Layers," Alice said. "Keep some length, lighten up, frame around your face," she thought aloud. "I think that'd be nice."
Bella nodded. "That's kind of what I was thinking."
"See?" Alice stuck her hand through Bella's elbow and leaned on her slightly. "Great minds and all that."
"Uh-huh," Bella answered with a grin. Alice pinched her side.
When they reached the dining hall they split up to find their meals. Bella was drawn to the fresh pastries that were out and grabbed a blueberry muffin instead of oatmeal, some fruit and a single scrambled egg to go with her tea and small glass of milk. She made her way out after scanning her card and found Jasper and Edward sitting with Emmett and Rosalie at their usual table.
"Good mornin', darlin'," Jasper greeted her, holding out the chair between him and Edward for her.
"Hi," she said taking the seat, smiling softly as Edward kissed her cheek.
"Sleep okay?" Edward asked once she was settled.
Bella shrugged. "Yeah, I guess."
Jasper gave her arm a squeeze and smiled sympathetically, but didn't say anything as he went back to his breakfast. She returned it and focused on her plate, splitting her muffin and smearing it with a bit of butter. It was still warm, and just perfect as the butter melted quickly.
"You didn't call," Edward said quietly, and he sounded slightly hurt.
"Sweetheart," Bella sighed softly. She put her knife down and turned slightly toward him. "As much as I would have loved to have slept over with either one of you," she said, reaching her other hand for Jasper, "I needed to sleep in my own bed, or I'll never be able to go back."
"That's a problem?" Edward asked, and Bella could see that he was only half serious.
Bella laughed softly, hearing Jasper chuckle on her other side. "Yeah, baby, that's a problem," she answered as Alice joined them at the table. "Just for the next two months, though, right?"
"Right," Jasper said. "We'll get things figured out before the end of the school year."
Edward nodded. "Okay. I just don't want you to think you can't call or come over if you can't sleep or anything."
Bella smiled and kissed his cheek quickly. "I know," she assured him. She turned back to her tray and Jasper gave her hand a squeeze before letting go so they could eat.
"Everyone ready to be back to it?" Alice asked.
The responses from everyone were fairly noncommittal. Spring break was always welcome, but the return was difficult, knowing there were still nearly two full months left. The students always came back more restless than they'd been before the break and the instructors all wanted another week to do the prep-work they'd told themselves they'd do while on vacation which never actually got done.
They chatted through the last few minutes of breakfast before classes, and Jasper walked Bella to their office, her arm linked with his elbow. She made another cup of hot tea with a bit of honey in the new mug she'd bought in L.A. before heading to her first class.
The first day back from holidays were always difficult, and Bella thankfully hadn't planned to do anything more strenuous than review. Her literature students had reading assigned over the break, but she gave them another day to finish, letting them discuss up to where they had left off as a class before departing for their week's vacation.
Jasper brought her lunch as usual, but also a surprise in the form of Edward. "Sorry darlin', he followed me back. Can we keep him?" He teased.
Edward shoved him lightly from behind as Bella laughed, and once the door was closed, kissed them both, the lingering contact putting a temporary stop on the slight ache she'd felt since they'd walked her home late Saturday night. In the back of her mind she wondered if she'd ever truly loved James; she'd never felt that way after or while being separated from him for any length of time.
Jasper caressed her cheek lightly when he pulled away, moving across the room to grab the guest chair from his desk so they could all eat together at Bella's, while Edward hung onto her a little longer. When Edward let her go, she cleared space enough on her desk for the three of them to eat from their take-out containers. Jasper had a burger and tater tots from the grill, and Edward had a sandwich with fries. Jasper had brought Bella a Thai chicken wrap with peanut sauce, and a brownie.
They chatted as they ate, and Bella helped herself to some of the fried potatoes on both trays in front of her. "So," she said. "Alice has asked me to go to Portland with her in two weeks," she said.
"Any particular reason?" Jasper asked, rising.
Bella grinned. "Seems like that fling may be slightly more than that," she responded. "Her name is Charlotte, and she invited Alice down. Alice didn't want to go on her own, and I said I'd go, if we didn't have plans."
"You don't have to ask us," Edward chided her gently. "If you want to go, just say so. Or not, and we'll make excuses for you to keep the hyper one off your back," he said with a wink.
Bella nodded. The habits she'd developed in her relationship with James were hard to break.
"I'm on call that weekend," Jasper said from his desk, having moved to look at his calendar. "So I'm stuck here, no matter what other plans get made."
"So, it's up to you, really, love, if you want to go," Edward said. "It'll mean a trip to Powell's probably, right?"
Bella rolled her eyes at his teasing tone. "Yes, probably."
"Go and have a good time, darlin'," Jasper said with a hint of encouragement in his voice. "Think of it as a mini vacation. See if you can get Alice to put you up someplace with a spa so you can get a bit of pamperin' in while she's off having fun," he said with a grin. "Especially since you had to work so hard over Spring Break."
"Yeah, that guy was a slave driver, wasn't he?" She asked rhetorically.
"I'm in the room, guys," Edward said with a shake of his head, and Bella and Jasper just laughed. Edward glanced at his watch. "I need to run. I'll see you both at dinner. Go with Alice if you want, love. I'm sure I can find a way to occupy myself and Jasper." He rose and kissed her softly, then Jasper, and showed himself out.
Jasper gathered their trash and dumped the containers in the bin near the door. He came back and took over Edward's seat at the corner of Bella's desk where she was still picking at her brownie. When he didn't say anything for a moment, she asked him. "What?"
He took her hand across her desk. "You're your own woman, Bells. You don't need our permission to do anything, y'know," he said, quietly sincere. He was worried; she could see it in his eyes. "If you feel like you have to ask us before you do things, will you tell us, please? I don't want our relationship to go that way."
She twined their fingers together. "I promise," she said quietly. She hoped she could keep it. Bella knew that neither of them wanted to control her, and that Jasper in particular would be extremely damaged, emotionally, if it happened. The worry in Jasper's eyes eased a bit and he half-rose from his seat and kissed her softly, before dragging his chair back to his desk and finished up his prep for his afternoon classes.
The rest of Bella's afternoon went quickly and without any significant problems. By the end of classes she was tired, and she waved Jasper (and one of his students) goodbye as she went to check on the yearbook group. They had one final week to get the layout complete and get the book sent off to be printed and bound. The students were nearly done, but they were waiting for pictures from spring breaks and for a few more clubs to have their official group pictures done. Bella promised that she'd bring cookies on their final meeting a week from Thursday since it would be a late night, and made a note to ask Esme if it was alright if she used the kitchen the Wednesday before after therapy.
Bella nearly accepted Alice's invitation to go to Portland over dinner, but held her tongue until they were back in their suite; she didn't know how much Alice might have told Rosalie and Emmett, and rather than ruin that for her, she decided to wait. Once Alice had hugged her in thanks, Bella changed into a pair of ratty sweatpants and one of Edward's hoodies and curled up in a corner of her bed (remade with corners as tight as she liked them) with the in-class writing assignments for the day, occasionally getting distracted by something going on in the messenger window she kept open on her laptop.
The rest of the week went well. After Monday, the students settled back into their routines and everything went back to more or less normal. In return for her taking off to Portland, she asked Jasper and Edward to keep Saturday open, and spent part of her free time that week planning a date day on Saturday, making sure that they were back in time for the family dinner.
Friday night after dinner, Jasper and Edward walked Bella home. She kissed them both, reminded them to be up early and at her car at six the next morning, and to wear comfortable clothes, but to pack a small bag with a "better than casual" shirt for her afternoon plans, and clothes for Sunday, not wanting to give anything away. Edward whined and Jasper shushed him, promising he could sleep in the car, since there had to be a reason they were up that early. Bella just grinned and shooed them out of her room.
Once they were gone, Bella opened a bottle of wine from the small rack Alice kept on their kitchenette counter, poured a glass and drew herself a bath. Alice had gone to her studio space after dinner, so Bella was alone in the suite. Before she submerged herself in the water she dragged her smaller iPod speaker into the bathroom and cracked her door open, scrawling a note on her board, letting the girls on her floor know where she was.
Bella soaked until the water started to cool, then took the time to carefully shave before pulling the stopper on the tub and rinsing off under the shower, leaving her hair for her morning shower. She refilled her wine glass before she went back into her room and closed and locked the door to change. Once she was dressed, she opened her door again, since she was the only one on the floor, and settled down to read one of her guilty pleasure novels. Knowing that Tanya was on call in the suite she shared with Rose on the floor below, Bella took a quick lap around the rooms on her floor before she turned out her light, excited about her plans with Jasper and Edward the next day.
Despite her excitement, sleep found Bella easily, and she woke with her alarm once again at the ungodly hour of what Charlie used to call the colon of dawn ("It's even too early to be the butt-crack of dawn, Bells" he'd once said). Still, she roused herself and for the second time in less than twelve hours she was in the shower, washing her hair and lathering up with her body wash for good measure. Wrapped in her robe and towel she peeked into Alice's room to see if she'd come home from her studio, to see that her bed was made and looked unslept in. Bella frowned, but shrugged it off; she'd probably gone to Esme and Carlisle's if she hadn't worked clear through the night.
Bella pulled her hair back into a comfortably loose French braid so that it was out of her face for the day, but still looked nice. The braid ended about half-way down her back, and she needed two ties to make sure it was secure. She knew she was blessed with her thick mane, but sometimes she wished she'd just get up the guts to cut it already. A pair of her dressiest jeans were paired with layers of shirts, in case it got warm while they were outside, and she pulled a sweater from her bureau and set it next to her purse and the small bag she'd bundled a crochet project into for the ferry ride. She pulled her duffel bag from its place under the bed and packed up clean clothes for Sunday, since they'd be spending their regular Saturday night at the Cullens'. She placed her sweater on top, zipped it up and tossed it over her shoulder.
When she reached her car, Edward and Jasper were waiting, Jasper holding two bags and Edward looking slightly dazed. "Good morning," she greeted them quietly.
"Mornin'," Jasper returned, his voice still sleep-rough, making his accent slightly more pronounced. He took her bags as she fumbled to open the trunk.
"Morning, Bella," Edward answered, blinking sluggishly.
She couldn't help but giggle. "How long have you been up?" she asked as Jasper loaded their bags into the car.
"Half an hour?" Edward shrugged.
"Awhile," was all Jasper would say.
She kissed both of their cheeks and chivvied them toward the doors. "First stop, Starbucks," she declared.
"It's your show, sweetheart," Edward responded, moving to the shotgun position while Jasper slid into the back.
"Jazzy, how come you always take the backseat?" Bella asked as she got in and started the car. She normally would've asked one of the guys to drive, but she was trying to keep her plans secret as long as possible.
She saw him shrug in the rearview mirror as she backed out of her parking space. "I dunno," he answered. "It seems more polite to let you have the front seat when Edward's driving, and I guess it gives Edward more leg room."
"Your legs are longer, babe," Edward responded, his head tipped back against the seat already.
"But it's not as big a deal for me to need to stretch out, either," Jasper countered. "Honestly, it's not something I do consciously. I hadn't even really thought about it."
Bella smiled at him in the mirror and he returned it. It was a short ride to Starbucks and they piled back out. Her boys insisted that she order first, and she made them add their orders to hers, telling them they'd better get breakfast if they wanted it, because that stop wasn't on her itinerary. "It's my turn to pay," she insisted. "Second date, remember?"
They glanced at each other, probably trying to do the same math that Bella had to realize that this was only their second real date. "Alright," Jasper said slowly.
When they moved over to wait for their drinks, Bella felt Edward's arms go around her waist and his cane thump lightly against her shin as his chin rested lightly on top of her head. "Hey," he said quietly.
"Hey," she answered, relaxing back into his embrace slightly.
Jasper chuckled quietly where he stood next to her and Edward, and Bella reached back for his hand.
"What're we doing today?" Edward asked.
"Dunno," Bella answered, biting her lower lip. "Thought we'd drive around until we figured something out," she teased.
"Bel-la," Edward whined.
"Ed-ward," she whined right back. Jasper just continued to laugh softly next to them, clearly amused by the exchange.
"Aren't you curious?" Edward turned to Jasper.
"Sure," Jasper answered with another lazy shrug. "But it's the lady's day, and she'll tell us when she's ready, right?"
"Right," Bella said with a firm nod, shifting out of Edward's arms just long enough to kiss Jasper quickly, paying no heed to who might be watching. "Trust me, Edward?"
"I do, love," he answered, hugging her again as the barista called their names. They gathered their cups and paper baggies with their pastries and climbed back into the car.
Bella hooked her iPod up to the auxiliary cable she left in the center console and called up her 'road trip' playlist before she pulled back onto the road. The sounds of rustling paper bags disrupted the music for the first few minutes, but they mostly sipped and munched quietly for the first fifteen minutes or so of the trip, until Edward took notice of where they were going.
"Port Angeles?" He asked with a small frown.
"Kinda," Bella answered, not giving anything away. "Patience, grasshopper."
It was the first time the three of them had shared a longer car ride, and once the caffeine and nourishment began to absorb into their systems, both Edward and Jasper perked up slightly, and Bella turned the music down so they could talk. They caught up a bit on their lives in general; Bella was always surprised at how much of each other's lives they missed out on by really only sharing a couple of meals every day. She was ready to have that sense of family that she'd had in high school; even though it'd been only her and Charlie, she knew she wasn't alone at night in their small house on the Res because it had been home. Though her suite with Alice was the closest she'd come in awhile, it still wasn't the same.
"Can I ask you guys something?" Bella asked quietly when they were about half-way to Port Angeles.
"Of course you can, darlin'," Jasper said from the back seat.
"What's going to happen this summer? Or next year?" She asked.
"How do you mean?" Edward asked, and she glanced over to see his brow furrow.
"Well…Edward, you and I usually stay with your parents," Bella said. "And I know that they've accepted us and everything, but…" she paused. "What about our privacy? Do we escape to a hotel every weekend? Do we just continue to share Edward's childhood room and a bed that's still a size too small?" Her voice was soft, but she knew that they both heard her. "I know it's only been a couple months for us, but I was just thinking about how long it's been since I've had a place that I can call home, and how we never seem to have the space and privacy we want unless we're paying for it."
"Well, I don't know about the summer, though we should talk about that," Edward answered, and Bella felt his hand on her thigh. "But the fall will depend on whether or not Jasper gets offered or accepts the full time position in the History department, and if the board decides that I've fulfilled the role of Director of Bands decently enough to keep the job for next year, not that they'd ask me to leave if I haven't," Edward said.
"And if Jasper doesn't get the job?" Bella's voice sounded small even to her own ears. She didn't want to think about what could possibly happen if Jasper didn't continue working at the school.
"Then Jasper figures out what to do in or near Forks so he can stay close to his family," Jasper answered. "If they offer me the job, I'm going to take it, so don't worry about that," he assured them, and Bella had known that. She was just worried that the board would find some reason to not offer him the job. "I've told Edward this before, but as much as I love teaching, if I have to figure out something else, I will. I have other options."
"The board will be meeting at the beginning of May," Edward said, his thumb making small circles near the seam of Bella's jeans on the inside of her thigh. "We'll know in a couple weeks what the fall semester will look like. What would you like to do this summer?" he asked.
"I love your family, Edward, you know that," Bella started with the disclaimer. "Your parents have been nothing but wonderful to me since I've known them, and your brother has adopted me, but sometimes-"
"They can be a bit much," Edward finished dryly. Jasper chuckled quietly in the back seat. "So, you don't want to stay there this summer?"
"I don't know," Bella said with a sigh. "What options do we have?"
"We could see if anyone's looking for someone to house-sit for the summer?" Jasper suggested.
"We can try," Edward answered. "Or maybe a vacation home further up the coast?" he suggested. "Close enough we could still make weekly dinners with the family, but far enough to have some privacy and enjoy our vacation."
"That may be more workable," Bella said. "And it appeals a bit more than spending the time in someone else's house. Not to mention, I doubt anyone around here is taking off for the full vacation, meaning we'd have to move around a lot." She took one hand off the wheel for a moment to still Edward's hand; his touch was becoming more than slightly distracting as his hand had drifted further up her thigh, probably unconsciously.
"How about we look into that for the summer, darlin'?" Jasper asked. "And we can deal with the more long term future when we have a better idea of what will happen?" His hand brushed her shoulder.
She nodded. "Okay."
"Okay," Edward agreed. "Is there anything else while you've got a captive audience?" he asked, his tone teasing, but the question serious.
"Uhm. Ye-ah," Jasper said, drawing out the second word slightly. "Am I the only one that feels slightly like a multiple personality?" he asked. "I mean – we kind of have two lives, y'know? The one that the school and public sees, which is Edward and I, which is accepted enough, and the one that only our family knows, which is the three of us. Am I the only one that that feels like we have a public and private persona and have to check that at the door every time we go out together?"
"No, baby, you're not, and you're not the only one that's noticed, either. When we were in San Francisco after New Year's, I noticed how much more open you seemed, because we were in a place where no one knew us. It was the same while we were in L.A. last week, except when we were around the students," Edward observed. "But I've thought about it, too."
"Me too," Bella agreed, catching Jasper's eyes in the mirror. "I don't know what to do about it, though."
"I hate having to hide things," Jasper continued. "And it's unfair to you, Bells."
Bella shrugged. "That doesn't matter to me."
"Why not?" Edward asked, sounding truly curious.
She took a moment to put her thoughts together and the soft music filled the silence before she started speaking again. "I don't need public acknowledgment of my relationship to validate it," she finally stated. "All that's important to me is that I have a family who loves me and accepts my relationship with my partners."
"So that'd be a no on marriage, then?" Edward asked.
"Not necessarily," Bella answered. "I love the idea of a ceremony that shows my family how committed to a relationship I am," she said. "What I don't need is the government putting their stamp of approval on it, though I can't deny the benefits, and if I were in a more conventional relationship, I might not hesitate to accept a proposal for exactly those reasons if I was ready to spend the rest of my life with someone.
"What I mean is that it's not important to me if the students, faculty, or staff knows about our relationship. It iis/i important that we keep our jobs, only because Carlisle was right, and if we come out with our relationship in the wrong way or time, it would be hard for us to get jobs as teachers anywhere else."
"But do we need them?" Jasper asked quietly, interrupting. "You've got a successful writing career, and I don't need to worry about money, well, ever, quite frankly. Edward could still teach lessons to open minded folk, and we could be happy, maybe, even if we didn't teach. I'd go slightly mad without having something to do," he said lightly, coaxing a smile from both Bella and Edward, "but it wouldn't be the end of the world if it meant we got to live a peaceful life together."
"I'm sure we could deal with it, if it happened," Bella answered. "But what I was going to say, getting back to Jasper's bigger question is that we're not always out as the three of us. Sometimes it's me and Edward, and sometimes me and Jasper, and sometimes you two together," she explained. "And what 'm more worried about is someone starting a rumor that I'm splitting you up, or that you're cheating on each other with me, or something that damages your reputations."
"Because being a sexual deviant isn't going to be damaging?" Edward asked, one of his eyebrows arched.
"What the fuck, Edward?" Jasper asked, clearly upset by the question with the tone he used.
"It's what parents are going to say to the board when our relationship gets out," Edward said softly. "And you know it's going to, whether we need or want it to or not, and we're going to have to be prepared for what people are going to say about us."
"I wish I could say that didn't matter, but it does," Bella agreed, knowing she didn't have a thick enough skin to have to endure any of that, which was part of why she was glad Jasper had broached the topic.
"And I think that it's not so much at school that we have to worry, but when we're out in public where we could be seen by the students or other faculty," Jasper said. Bella got the feeling he was trying to avoid addressing Edward's statement. "I don't want to say that we can't go out together, or that we can't touch or otherwise be affectionate if we're having a meal off campus, or we go shopping or whatever. And I know we're mostly being careful, but do we need to set guidelines for ourselves. When do we get to be ourselves and when do we have to pretend?" he asked, and Bella wasn't sure if that was a rhetorical question or not. "I don't even like having to think about asking that question," Jasper admitted. "But unfortunately we have to think about this, because of our roles in the world."
"We could always just resign," Edward said, sounding more serious than not. "Find private sector work, at least on my part, where our lifestyles wouldn't come into question. Bella could keep writing and set up a small shop for her yarn and stuff, and you could find that hobby to keep busy, baby," Edward said. "It's always an option, though not one we have to necessarily consider right now. But if it comes to that, we can take the decision out of the Board's hands."
"Point," Bella agreed. "But I think Jazzy's right; we just need to watch ourselves when we're out where students or faculty could see us. Today, for example, we'll probably be okay, like we were in L.A., at least in the park when we were on our own. I don't like having to hide, either," she consoled them. "But until we can get that place called 'home' settled down, and we have to figure out how to get time together, it's going to be difficult."
"So, we take date night out of town, when we can, we'll find a vacation home to rent out of town for the summer, and deal with things as they come," Edward summarized. "We'll just have to keep being careful for awhile around the students, and take it easy when we're in town, which isn't that hard, since we're really not huge PDA people," he pointed out.
"True," Jasper responded as Bella signaled to change lanes as she approached the exit for Port Angeles. "We just need to remember to keep talking to each other," he said. "I know sometimes we don't have all the time we need, but I think it's going to be important, especially with so many thoughts and feelings to consider between all three of us."
"You're right," Edward agreed. "Does that help, sweetheart?" His thumb was back to making circles against the inside of her thigh again.
"Yeah, it does," Bella said, easily navigated her way through Port Angeles to the ferry dock.
"We're going to Canada?" Jasper asked, his voice closer than Bella had expected. He'd leaned forward between the two front seats.
"Yup," Bella answered. "You both missed the trip we took this fall, so I thought we could spend this morning and early afternoon in the gardens, and then have a slightly late lunch at the Empress for tea before we head home. Esme expects us a little later and will hold dinner," she explained, slightly nervous about how they'd take her plans.
"Sounds perfect, darlin'." Jasper kissed her cheek and settled back in his seat.
"It does sound like a really good day," Edward agreed, and Bella felt her nerves settle.
Bella paid and carefully drove onto the ferry. "I can't stay in here," she confessed as she unbuckled her seatbelt once the car was securely parked. "I'll get too claustrophobic. Let's wander?"
"Sure," Edward agreed. Jasper echoed him and they climbed from the car, careful of the close quarters. Jasper peered around, locating the entrance to the stairs that would put them up on deck, then took Bella's hand and started leading her (and Edward, who'd taken Bella's other hand) toward it. They slowed as they took the stairs, keeping pace with Edward, and Bella took a deep breath when they arrived on the open deck. She'd always enjoyed spending time the water; even with as much as it rained in Washington State in general and Forks in specific, she thought everything on the water just smelled cleaner and fresher.
None of them had thought to bring jackets, and though Jasper seemed unaffected, Edward tugged Bella against his chest after they reached the railing and wrapped his arms around her waist. She welcomed the warmth of him against her back, the morning a bit more chilly than she'd anticipated. Edward's hands slipped under her shirts, the view of it obscured to other passengers because they were facing out to sea. She tipped her head back against this shoulder and he kissed her temple, looking for all the world like a couple out with a friend.
Bella reached for the nearest of Jasper's hands and he took hers, twining their fingers together. His thumb caressed over her wrist while Edward's fingers warmed under her shirts, dancing little patterns against her skin. They were anonymous on the ferry, and with their recent conversation dancing in her head, Bella pulled Jasper closer and kissed him softly.
She was still more than half-way to turned on by Edward's caresses to her thigh earlier, and his continued strokes against her stomach weren't helping, especially when he began kissing the exposed skin along the column of her neck. Normally, the attention in public would have put her off, especially since her hair was pulled back out of her face, not allowing for any concealment, but that the moment, she didn't care as much.
"Edward," Jasper said quietly, his thumb still moving over the soft skin at the inside of Bella's wrist. The touch normally would've been innocent under other circumstances.
"Hm?" The vibration of Edward's hum through his lips against Bella's neck sent a shiver down her spine, and his arms tightened momentarily around her waist.
"If you're thinking what I think you're thinking we should probably move away from the railing and find somewhere a bit more secluded," Jasper suggested.
"How do you know what I'm thinking?" Edward asked, teasing, his warm breath a contrast to the cool skin on his nose as he nuzzled Bella lightly below and behind her ear.
"You're not being as subtle as you think you are," Jasper responded, letting Bella's hand go to wrap his arm around Edward's waist, taking Bella's hand again with his left crossing over his body.
"Okay." Edward hugged Bella close again then released her, taking her free hand instead. Bella watched, amused as he glanced around, then tugged them toward an alcove. Bella giggled as she stumbled after him, Jasper trying to steady her under Edward's determined power.
Edward nudged her up against the bulkhead and kissed her deeply, Jasper coming to a stop alongside them. Jasper faced them as they faced each other, and she felt him release her hand but contact wasn't broken as he wrapped an arm low around her waist, steadying her as she returned Edward's kiss. Jasper's hand slipped into the waistband of her jeans and he teased her with light touches along her tailbone, fingers skirting under her panties.
It normally would take a lot more foreplay for Bella to be ready for any act of intimacy, but the trill of fear that they could be seen got her adrenaline going, which only helped to heighten the arousal that Jasper and Edward were coaxing from her body. She felt herself eagerly respond to their touches and kisses.
Edward cupped her face in his hands as he kissed her. When he broke the kiss, his hands trailed down her neck and shoulders, tracing down her arms until he reached her waist. With a cheeky grin, his hands slid toward the button her jeans as he kissed her again. "Remember what we were saying about that public and private life?" he said quietly in a low voice against her lips. "No one will notice us out of the way here," he continued, his lips trailing over her jaw. "We can be whoever we want, and no one will ever know," he breathed.
Bella wanted to protest, but before a sound could escape, Jasper's lips were near her ear and he was speaking lowly to her as Edward's fingers worked the button of her jeans. "No one can see you, darlin'. We wouldn't let that happen. Trust in us, okay? If you really don't want this, we'll stop, but that's not it, is it?" he asked, scraping his teeth lightly over her earlobe and she shuddered.
"No," she whispered. "I just don't – oh, god," she whispered as Edward got her pants open and slipped his hand inside, his fingers brushing against the soft skin hidden by her panties. "I don't want – want to get caught." Her breath caught as she spoke, Edward's fingers dipping lower in her already damp underwear and she fleetingly thought she was a fucking genius for packing extra panties.
"Just relax, sweetheart. No one can see what we're doing." Jasper was slightly shielding her body, standing with his chest against her flank, and one of his hands slipped under her tops, his long fingers dancing along the skin of her torso, stopping against the underwire of her bra. She wanted to urge him on, make him go higher, but she held her breath as Edward slipped a finger into her and her legs slid farther apart on instinct, the action hidden from the rest of the passengers with Edward's chest pressed against her.
"If we do this again, you should wear a skirt," Edward breathed before kissing her deeply.
Bella hear a quiet noise of agreement and she wasn't sure if it was from Jasper, whose lips were on her neck, or herself as she returned Edward's kiss, breathless and wanting. If he left her hanging she was going to – oh. That thought went right out of her head as he crooked his finger inside of her. She could feel the cool steel of the ship against her back, and she thought she might have bruises from the rivets, but all she was focused on was the way Edward was making her feel.
"Do you know you gorgeous you look like this?" Jasper asked her quietly, his hand back down around her belly button, his hand brushing against Edward's wrist as well. "Have you ever watched yourself in a mirror, darlin'? You're such a lovely shade of pink," he described as Bella bit back a whimper as Edward's hand shifted and a second finger entered her. She tried to close her legs, desperate to seek more friction against the fingers that penetrated her, but Edward thwarted her, pressing his knee between her thighs instead, so she ground down slightly, trapping his fingers between her body and his own leg.
"I know proper ladies don't sweat, my mama taught me well on that one," Jasper continued, the drawl in his voice more exaggerated, which only fueled Bella's inner fire. "But you practically glow like this, when our hands are on you," he said. "When you're nude as the day you were born, the color creeps all the way down, and someday, when we have a bit more privacy than we've been afforded lately, I'm gonna follow that blush with some luscious body paint and my tongue, and I'm going to show you just how beautiful and special you are to me."
Bella had turned her head slowly toward Jasper as he spoke and he punctuated his little speech with a deep kiss, his tongue sliding against hers as Edward found her clit with his thumb, and she whimpered and wobbled, even braced against the ship, as Edward's mouth found the hollow at the base of her throat and he lightly kissed there. She could feel Jasper's hardness against her hip, and Edward's at her belly, and that only made her shift again and try to press herself against Edward's fingers and thigh again in an attempt to seek the release her body was already craving. She felt at once powerful knowing they got as turned on pleasuring her as when she did them, and vulnerable for the setting they were in, knowing they could get caught at any moment. But the thrill of that same vulnerability made it all the more exciting and she tried to push the thoughts away as she tried to focus on Jasper's words and Edward's fingers and not how harsh her breathing sounded against the chugging of the ships engines.
Thoughts slipped from her mind completely as Jasper broke the kiss, his lips lazily drifting over her jaw and up toward her ear again, his hand slipping farther up her shirt. His left hand remained braced on the ship, as if he was just leaning their casually, while the other cupped Bella's breasts in turn, his thumb tracing over her satin-covered nipples, which only helped to heighten the sensation. Her fingers clutched at Edward's hips as he shifted his stance, and she closed her legs against his thigh. She was so fucking close, she could feel her release just out of reach, hot and coiled low in her belly. Bella shifted her hips forward as Edward thrusted his fingers back into her as his thumb pressed on her clit. Once, twice more she moved with him, and just as she felt that she might noisily explode from lust all over the deck, Edward's lips crashed to hers and he swallowed the whimpersob when she finally came, her legs turning to jelly as the sensation washed through her. She felt strong hands at her back, keeping her upright, but she knew it couldn't be Edward, because she could still feel his fingers inside of her.
When she opened her eyes, Edward was looking down at her, like the cat that got the canary. He kissed her, more tenderly, and withdrew his hand, while Jasper rubbed lazy circles into the base of her spine with his hand. She returned Edward's kiss, then turned to Jasper, who chuckled softly as he acquiesced with her silent demand and kissed her, as well. While Edward was still in front of her, she quickly rebuttoned her pants and adjusted her shirts, and she had a feeling that if it weren't for the pink stain she could feel across her cheeks, she might be able to get away with no one else knowing that she'd just been finger-fucked by one of her lovers in front of a whole shipful of tourists.
"As much as I would love to wear your scent all day," Edward said quietly, not so surreptitiously adjusting himself in his jeans. "I need to find a washroom."
"Is that the only reason?" she teased quietly, accidentally on purpose brushing her hand against both of their groins as she pushed off the bulkhead she'd been leaning on. Twin hisses met her ear, and she bit her lip against the grin that burst forth. Each of her boys took a hand and they started walking, albeit slowly, back toward the main cabin, and the restrooms.
"Yes," Edward answered lowly, but his eyes were dark and his voice was thick, and if it took him longer than 30 seconds in the bathroom, she wouldn't be surprised.
"And let that go to waste?" she asked as they moved.
Jasper shrugged on her other side. "It'll come back," he said with a wink down at her, which made her giggle. He bent down close. "They like you," he whispered, as if confessing a deep dark secret which just made Bella burst out laughing.
The laughter on top of the orgasm induced euphoria just left her feeling more relaxed than she had any right to be, and after Edward ducked into the washroom and emerged less than a minute later, they found three seats together in the mild weather outside and sat close, enjoying the rest of the 90 minute crossing. Bella thought to have packed her camera and she snapped a few pictures over the water and of the land in the distance. She got a great one (she thought) of the mountains against the water. As they got closer to Victoria Island she was able to get some pictures of the Legislature Buildings.
When the announcement was made that they should go back to their cars, Bella allowed Jasper to help her from the seat and they went back to the car hand in hand.
Bella followed the queue of vehicles that exited the ferry. "Jazzy, in my purse are the directions I need," she said. She heard him rustle around and then saw him hand Edward the paper out of the corner of her eye. Edward played navigator as she drove through Victoria toward Butchart Gardens.
She paid their admission, knowing that if her partners had any idea of how much the whole day actually cost they'd protest even further that she was paying for everything. But she had a plan and she was determined to see it through, and honestly, it wasn't like she couldn't afford it. She knew she lived modestly, well within the means of her salary from the school, but Renee and Charlie's life insurance policies hand helped her set up decent investments that had only been furthered by the revenue from her books, and she got a draw from those accounts every couple of months, too.
It was just after ten-thirty in the morning when they entered the gardens and the day was clear, if not quite warm. Bella had made reservations for tea at the Empress at 2:30, knowing they had to be back on the 4:00 ferry to make it back to Forks to meet the others for their regular Saturday dinner, though Esme was prepared to hold dinner if Bella called and told her they would be late.
They spent their morning leisurely strolling the gardens. They lingered in the Japanese garden and the Sunken Garden longer than anywhere else, and Bella took plenty of pictures of both the flowers and her guys enjoying themselves, free of worry about being seen together, and also just basking in the sunshine of the day. Jasper did take her camera at one point; she hadn't wanted to give anything away by telling them to bring theirs.
Bella changed into her sweater for tea in the parking lot of the gardens, quickly stripping out of her layers of t-shirts and pulling the sweater on over a camisole. Jasper didn't need to change, but Edward rapidly swapped his long sleeved t-shirt for a polo that he tucked into his jeans.
At the hotel, Bella checked them in for their reservation, and they were promptly seated. Their late lunch was fantastic. They were treated to fresh fruit with cream and raisin scones with cream and jam. They had five different finger sandwiches to choose from, and Bella felt slightly exposed, but also very pleased as Jasper and Edward would tempt her with bites from their fingers. She wasn't bold enough to try it for herself, but they seemed happy to spoil her slightly. The tea was delicious, and Jasper even sampled each of the various pastries, finding a couple he liked, but shuffling those that were too sweet for his tastes onto Bella or Edward's plate.
The conversation stayed light as they ate and sipped their tea, and Bella just generally enjoyed herself. Jasper excused himself while Bella settled their check and she and Edward sat talking quietly until he returned, a small shopping bag bearing the hotel logo in hand, and he just grinned and shook his head when she asked.
"Are you okay to drive home, darlin'?" Jasper asked as they got back in the car and Bella handed Edward the directions back to the ferry from the hotel.
"I should be," she promised. "If we don't get up to any more fun and games on the ferry ride home," she teased.
"We'll be gentlemen," Edward promised.
"Oh, you were perfect gentlemen this morning," she quipped. Jasper laughed softly in the backseat. "I'm okay," she promised.
On the ferry ride back across to Port Angeles, they found seats within the gallery, since the weather had turned dark late in the afternoon, and they weren't properly dressed to enjoy the ride in the rain. They got hot drinks in the cafeteria on board and curled up together to watch the weather and the water while they talked a bit more about their plans for the summer. Jasper wanted to travel a bit, and Bella and Edward promised to set aside two weeks for a road trip, and he kissed them both in thanks.
When they arrived back in Port Angeles, Bella asked Edward to call his mom and let her know they were on their way and on time. Music filled the drive and Bella smiled softly as Jasper's light snore mingled with the music as he dozed. She wondered how truthful his statement from that morning had been about his being up 'for awhile.' With Jasper, that could have meant anything.
The Cullen home was brightly lit when they arrived just before six-thirty. Jasper woke when Bella shut off the engine after pulling up behind Emmett's jeep in the street. "Hey, Jazzy," she said, smiling at him in the mirror. "Nap well?"
"Hm," he said with a nod, scrubbing his hands over his face. "Sorry."
"Don't worry about it," Edward said, looking over his shoulder as he unfastened his belt.
Bella released her seatbelt and slid from the car with a quiet groan as she stretched, feeling her back pop in a couple of places. Jasper went around to the trunk for their bags, since they'd be staying over, and she walked to the door hand in hand with Edward.
"Thank you for a fantastic day, sweetheart," Jasper said, kissing her softly before they went inside. Edward echoed the sentiment and the kiss, then let them in, calling out to the rest of the family.
The second half of this chapter will post next week.
For this chapter, I'm pretending that all you need to enter Canada and get back into the US is a valid driver's license, because it would ruin the surprise if Bella told them to bring their passports.
I'll put a link to the Butchart Gardens photo gallery on the blog, as well as some images from the ferry from the company's website.
Show me a Garden won 3 awards at Jasper's Darlins' "Everything's Bigger in Texas" contest: Those Glasses are Hawt (Geeksper), Best All-Human, and Best Overall Slash. Thanks to everyone who voted to show their love for this story.
