Author's Note: For those who asked, Amphetamine is a drug that boosts up your energy and can last for, I believe, eight hours

Author's Note: For those who asked, Amphetamine is a drug that boosts up your energy and can last for, I believe, eight hours. It is most widely used for dancing and once addicted or overdosed it results in feeling irritable and violent. It usually comes in the form of powder but more often now it is being put into pill form. If you want more in-depth answers I would suggest the internet, this is just my basic knowledge of the drug. Thanks for the reviews everyone, I honestly suspected that most of you had given up on me.

XxXxXxXxX

Sweat drenches my palms as I watch the door knob turn. Miley walks in with an easy smile wearing a loose tank top and sweats. She pulls her towel down from her hair and shakes, letting loose water droplets. We meet eyes.

"What's wrong?"

I try to start but my throat burns and I cannot unclench my hand from the bottle. Maybe if I hold it hard enough it will dissolve in my palm, or possibly Adrianna was lying…

"Lilly, what is going-" She sees my hands, "Let me see that, Lilly, let me see it." She walks over to me and holds out her hand.

I open my mouth, "No, not until you explain yourself."

She looks taken back but then stares humorously at me as if I said a joke, "Well, if I knew what that was maybe you could get some answers."

Her comment stings strangely to me, I feel like I'm talking to Adrianna; Miley's movements are no longer hers. The hair I had grown to love- that long curly mess of brown is now copped short and set in straight lines. Everything about her has altered. And now, her morals have vanished.

I hold the bottle out, "Explain." I demand harshly.

Miley runs a finger through her wet hair and walks to the door, then turns back to me, "Who gave you those."

"Adrianna and I had a little chat while you were in the shower… Miley who is Greg and what the fuck are these doing being sent to you?!"

Nothing, she just stands there, astonished and silent.

"Talk! Talk to me!" I scream, "I needed you… and all this time, you were doing drugs and ignoring me! But I'm standing right here," I point to my shoes, "And you cannot ignore me now." With flushed cheeks and an angry scowl I wait.

"The pills help me stay energized." She whispers, not missing a beat.

I can't hold in anymore breath so I exhale all air within me and keep it there, out. I don't want to inhale this air, this cramped dorm room air. My lungs burn and my eyes sting. "How… ummm how long have you been u-using them?" I ask her staring down at the orange bottle.

Miley is quiet for a moment. It scares me because then the thought of 'maybe she can't really remember… maybe she's been using them for so long' drifts into my head.

"A month after I arrived here." She says playing with the hem of her tank top.

"Who gave them to you?"

Pause. "Adrianna told me about it… but I sought them out."

"That son of a bitch," I growl, "I hate her… God, I hate her."

Miley shakes her head, "Please, Lilly it's not her fault…. Things just got so complicated with Adrianna and me and I was so tired and… and you…"

The mention of me jammed together with the rest of her problems creates a hole in my heart, "What do you mean, what did I do?"

She notices her mistake and cringes, "Nothing, nothing at all, you're fine."

"Obviously there's something wrong Miley!" I bite back throwing the pills down to ground, it makes a horrific crack on the hardwood then the bottle proceeds by rolling and rattling the white pills. The bottle stops at Miley's foot.

"I'm not perfect, Lilly." She says with a husky voice.

"I'm not either, Miley, but you're… you're taking drugs and… this isn't healthy. Just stop, stop taking them!"

She looks angry now, "I won't! I'm not going to do that Lilly, because you have no idea what it is like here, the things I have to do day in and day out! And don't you dare judge me! You smoked! So don't you dare…," Her voice cracks and she can't finish.

"You are missing the point!" I cry while flinging out one of my arms, "I quit, Miley, I quit for you and for me. But this, this isn't you."

Miley sneers and it is ugly, "Yeah, like you know me."

My stomach feels sick, "I thought I did… where are you? Where is that girl I met in Mr. Gunter's AP English class?"

Miley shakes her head back and fourth quickly, "We're not in high school, Lilly."

"So what! That doesn't mean I didn't love you in high school. You need to stop, Miley, there is no going around it."

She places both her hands over her face; the air conditioner hums from the ceiling and outside I can hear the thudding of ballerina feet as they pass by. And then, mumbling, I hear her. "She was right…" Miley sighs in her hands.

Breathlessly, I respond, "Who?"

Miley unveils her face, dropping her arms to her sides and stares at me with a stone like expression and then repeats, "Adrianna was right."

I take a step back, my mouth opens then closes, she has finally put me at a loss.

"She was so right about you, Lilly. You liked me that way! So sweet, so shy… you liked it when I was beneath you when you were the stronger one!" Miley cries.

"Maybe I did!" I shout, then-

Miley does something I never expected. She slaps me. She slaps me so hard I bite my tongue. A stunned silence drapes over both of us. Miley's hands retreat quickly back to her mouth in astonishment. I slowly place a cool hand to my burning cheek. We do not speak, Miley looks horrified. I taste the tiniest hint of blood in my mouth.

But I will not cry.

"You hit me…" I say softly, almost as if I don't believe it.

"I-" Miley looks disgusted with herself as she backs further away from me.

My eyes widen as I look at her, she hit me.

"Lilly…" She sounds so small, "I'm so s-so-sorry." She hiccups over the syllables with tears forming around the edges of her eyes.

I shrug my shoulders and drop my hand from my face, "So this is you then, bitchy drug addict? So everything we shared… all the things I-" I stop and place a hand to my aching chest, "All the things I told you, I opened up to you, damn it! I've never done that… not after Nate… Jesus, how could you?"

Miley's face frowns as she stomps her foot, "Stop blaming me, stop putting all of this on me!"

"It should be put on you, fuck… Miley, you did this!" I cry out in frustration. My cheek feels like its on fire as I rub the back of my neck with my sweaty palm. And in my mouth I still have the metal like taste blood leaves behind. I wipe my mouth and stand up tall. "Alright, then it's me or the drugs… I can't be with you if this is what you are."

She never speaks. Miley's gaze lingers over the fallen bottle.

I have my answer.

Head dizzy, mouth dry, I walk to the door and open it, just as I'm about to leave I turn back to her, "You know, Miley, this whole time everyone kept telling me to be good to you, warning me not to hurt you…," With a weak smile, and heavy heart I tell her in a voice thick with emotion, "But who knew... who knew it would be you who would break my heart…. No one every warned me about that." I turn and walk away. As I make my way down the hall I keep hoping, maybe she'll come to her senses; maybe she'll come after me. I wait by the elevator-

She never comes.

What now?

XxXxXxXxX

I' am numb. I feel nothing. Sitting in my car with the silence as I drive down the highway feels good, like I'm accomplishing something. I grip the steering wheel with a new strength and press my foot harder against the accelerator. I have power here. The sound of my engine roaring builds me up. Lose pennies and dimes rattle in my cup holder. I glance out my rearview mirror one last time.

I pass a sign that reads- You are now leaving the Los Angles Area!

XxXxXxXxX

I stop the car in a parking lot and pop open the door. I'm standing outside a K-mart somewhere in Arkansas. I get out and walk, my legs are really beginning to cramp up. I stroll around looking into the stores along the strip mall. I spot a bench outside one of the dumpy building and sit. I take out my phone and quickly dial.

Hey you've reached the triple 'O' so leave your name number and I'll get back to you soon! I wait impatiently for the beep to come and then- "Oliver, hey, it's me. Listen, I should be home in a few hours… umm… I've got some not so great news. I hope you're good and Sarah's good… just good. We should get together, chat some…. I miss you, bye."

I hang up and move on.

XxXxXxXxX

I realize its December 23rd about the time I pull up into the driveway. It's around three in the morning. I shut off the car lights and kill the engine. I drag my bags slowly into the house. The door is always open, I walk in and that eerie darkness takes me once again. But as I turn the corner I see lights coming from the living room. Dropping my bags I walk over.

A beautiful tree rests in the corner of the living room, its evergreen aroma filters through my nose. Colorful lights sparkle, illuminating the dead white walls of our house. My mouth hangs ajar and my chest feels so much fuller with a bittersweet edge. As my eyes drift I find the figure of my father resting in his favorite chair, sipping wine. With the glimmering lights I see tears cornering his eyes.

"Dad?"

He quickly wipes his eyes and stands, placing the wine glass on the coffee table. "Lillian," He coughs, clearing his throat, "You're home."

I smile weakly, "And so are you… and the tree?"

He looks shy as he gestures to it and nods, "Um uh, yes, I bought it yesterday… for- for you. So you'd have it to come home too…"

"But we've never gotten a tree since…" I pause, not wanting to say it.

My dad rubs his neck and its then that I realize where I got all my nervous mannerisms from. "I think, Nate, would have wanted a tree." He says under his breath in a quick manner.

"Me too," I say, my voice growing more strained, "Thank- you, dad, you don't what this m-means to me."

And then, I feel it. The pain of loosing her grips me fiercely. My numb body fades leaving in its place a distasteful pain. I put my hands over my tired teary eyes and sigh in my own misery.

"Lilly?"

"Dad I- oh, God, everything is falling apart!" I feel my knees tremble, my body quivers- slowly collapsing into itself. But he catches me; my dad wraps his arms around me and presses my face to his brown sweater. "I don't understand," I whine into his chest, my nose running, eyes shedding tears.

"I don't think," He says into my hair, "I don't think anyone does."

XxXxXxXxX

Author's Note: Don't hate me. And before you hate Miley please consider everything- that was not her talking that was the drugs and Adrianna's silly nonsense filling Miley's head. But anyway, its great to get reviews from you guys again, I have surly missed our conversations. So, as usual, leave your thoughts.