Title: Journey
Disclaimer: Everything that's part of the Harry Potter world belongs to J. K. Rowling, especially the excerpts from Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.
Pairing: SS/RL, implied one-sided SS/LP, implied one-sided RL/NT, implied AD/GG
Author Notes: Okay, so this is Sectumsempra. I made it a little bloodier and dirtier and I had Sev clean up the bathroom because in the original chapter everything seemed so clean suddenly, the pipes and the water and the blood didn't turn up anymore and nobody talked about Severus' robes being dirty, which they must have been, so I added this. Hope you like it, though it is a little short.
SadisticCarrotcake: Sometimes I like it too when it's a chapter just with the two of them ;) Not this time, sorry.
soniakay: I'm better today, but the stress won't go away, the update took me longer this time because of that. Doesn't matter as long as I have journey and you :) Here you are, Remus in his new robes :)))
giiosp: Grazie :) That's a huge compliment and it's a special honour that you write a review if you don't usually write any, that's great. I'm glad that you like my way of depicting the characters and keeping to the original plot. And the ending of DH does not necessarily mean that it won't be romantic, so never fear :). I'm grateful and happy that you tell your friends about this story, but I must tell you that, to my knowledge, it has not been translated into Italian, sorry. Maybe if they speak only some English, they might try reading nonetheless. That's pretty much how I learned English ... I hope you'll stay with me anyway, thank you for your review and for reading.
Resevius: Well, I suppose that doesn't apply to every student, but I always felt that there was only so far you can go in a subject that you have no talent for (physics in my case ;)). I'm sure you'll be a great teacher! And yeah, I couldn't stop thinking that the Marauder's Map was Remus's work and that he would create something similar again. So, now, Sectumsempra :).
Good Deeds
When Severus woke he could feel that he had slept too long and he groaned as he found the bed empty and Remus gone Merlin knew where. His robes were nowhere to be found, only an old blue dressing gown his size and Severus knew that Remus was playing a prank on him. But strangely, he wasn't annoyed, not in the slightest, he even caught himself smiling. If Remus wanted him in a dressing gown, then he would wear one and see when his clothes would be given back to him. He found Remus in the kitchen, clad in his new robes, his wand pointed at a pan and two frying eggs inside it, exhibiting an unexpected skill at cooking spells that Severus had never seen in him.
"Show yourself to me," said Severus to attract Remus's attention and drew a circle in the air to make Remus turn around and show him the new robes. He nodded, satisfied with his choice. "It suits you."
Remus waved a dismissive hand at him, though he smiled in that pleased way that Severus knew was only used on him. "I suppose you want some breakfast?" asked Remus, hovering the eggs to the table to drop them on two slices of toast.
"Very kind of you," drawled Severus, raising an eyebrow at him, "but what I really want are my clothes."
Remus looked up at him and tried to seem innocent, but that mischievous light in his eyes was not to be erased. "Oh," he said, sitting down at the kitchen table, "I fear I cannot help you, it seems the house-elves returned tonight to pick up your things … I could not stop them."
Severus ogled him, for he suspected strongly that this was indeed the truth, except for the fact that Remus couldn't stop them. He was sure the werewolf had watched them, sniggering into Severus's shoulder. The scowl returned to his face rather quickly and he pulled out a chair very forcefully, failing as usual at making Remus flinch. "And what do you think shall I wear when I return to Hogwarts?"
"Well, you will return to your quarters, nobody will be watching you," chuckled Remus and pushed Severus's toast over the table to make him eat. "Though I suppose travelling by floo mostly naked would be unpleasant. Stop glaring, if you want, I can lend you a shirt and trousers of my father's, I'm sure they'll fit."
"Acceptable," growled Severus and Remus grinned at his egg. "Are you planning to go somewhere today? Or did you just want to try on your new robes?"
"Both," replied Remus pleasantly, carefully avoiding to make a mess of himself, "and I must say you chose well, and it fits perfectly. I think I have never worn such good fabric, my skin is rejoicing." He winked at Severus who smirked back at him, self-satisfied and pleased. "I wanted to visit Flourish and Blotts today, see if they have anything new, after all these months spent in dirt and constantly cold, I crave a good book in front of the fireplace with a cup of good tea and the man I love. Preferably here and dressed in his own clothing, which I will return to him should he agree to come back here tonight."
Severus snorted and the snort turned into a chuckle and the chuckle into a laugh before he even knew it. Remus's eyes widened while he smiled incredulously, his fork hovering in mid-air, yolk dripping from it. His hand reached for Severus's on the table and held it affectionately as Severus tried to compose himself. But the smile was plastered to his face, had made itself at home in the wake of Severus's unexpected laughter. "I have never seen such a charming blackmailer and liar as yourself," he mocked, rubbing his thumb over the back of Remus's hand. "You make your victim agree to anything. But do give me back my robes."
Remus smiled broadly at him. "Of course, now that I have what I wanted," he said, his eyes glowing, "eat something before you leave, you'll find your robes under the bed with a little Anti-Summoning Charm on them." He walked round the table and laid a hand to the side of Severus's neck to slide it down his shoulder under the dressing gown, pushing it aside, his warm fingers ghosting over Severus's skin. Severus shivered in pleasure and Remus chuckled, bending down to whisper into Severus's ear. "I like you in that dressing gown, by the way."
Severus tried to scowl after him as he left the kitchen, but didn't quite manage. He heard Remus rummage around and after a while there was silence until the werewolf heaved a huge sigh and Severus thought he knew what was wrong. He stood up and looked round the doorframe to find Remus sitting on the back of the sofa, an open tin beside him, counting something in his hand. Noiselessly, Severus stole upstairs and pulled his robes out from under the bed, donning them quickly, while feeling around in his pockets. He found his gold bag and hurried back downstairs where Remus was still counting his money and searching the tin for some coins he might have missed. Severus took his hand and counted the coins in it, finding six sickles and thirty knuts. Then he reached into his own bag and counted four galleons and eleven sickles into Remus's hand which the werewolf eyed incomprehensively.
"Would you like me to bring you anything?" he asked as Severus put his money bag into his pocket.
"No," said Severus, raising an eyebrow at him, "I would like you to buy a good book for yourself."
"Oh," said Remus and tried to shove the gold back into Severus's hand with a pained expression in his eyes, "oh, Severus, I cannot accept this. Really, I don't want your gold."
"Take it already," snapped Severus, folding his arms to give Remus no chance whatsoever to return the coins. "And keep your foolish pride to yourself as well, you insult me with your belief that I care about your addiction to independence. Take what I give you, it is not pity or responsibility that makes me give it, you silly werewolf!"
Remus gaped at him for a few moments until Severus rolled his eyes and kissed his lips and stepped through the fireplace to return to Hogwarts, leaving him behind in the living room, probably still gaping at the gold Severus had given to him. If he didn't buy a book from it, Severus would drag him into Flourish and Blotts by the scruff of his neck and force him to choose one! What did the werewolf have against Severus's wish to care for him? Wasn't it a relief to give up pride and dignity in front of him? It made Severus grumble to himself when he started wandering the corridors, pleased nonetheless when he came across Katie Bell, returned from St. Mungo's at last, who made to thank him for saving her, which he just waved away with a pleased glance at her.
After a while of wandering around, he found Draco on the sixth floor, hurrying into a bathroom and looking rather distressed. He felt curious and remembered his duty of watching the boy, so he lingered just out of sight of the door, determined to follow him again when he came back out. But instead of Draco coming out, it was Potter he saw going in, and he suspected that that was no coincidence. Still he decided not to intervene just yet, it seemed more interesting to wait and see what happened. He regretted this decision in no time, though. At first he thought he heard a normal fight among youths and believed Draco could show Potter that one didn't sneak after other people without suffering the consequences but when he heard someone shout "MURDER!" he feared that Draco must have gone too far in his despair and he dashed down the corridor, hoping that he hadn't let Potter die while standing just outside the place where it had happened. Remus wouldn't like that.
But yet again he was surprised when he stormed into the bathroom and didn't find Potter on the floor but Draco, deep gashes in his face and on his chest which bled severely, tainting the water, that was streaming out of the demolished pipes, crimson red. Potter was kneeling beside the shaking Draco, looking shocked and helpless at what he had done, and so was Severus, because he knew what curse had done this. It was his very own creation, Sectumsempra. The same that Remus had disapproved of and admired at the same time. Severus strode over to the two boys, shoving Potter roughly out of his way, knelt down beside Draco and pulled out his wand to trace it over the wounds Potter had cut into the boy's flesh. Instantly, Severus was in deep concentration, the incantation he had developed, years after the spell whose damage he was mending, flowing from his lips like the chants of a monk.
Severus watched the blood flow cease gradually and when he had come to the end of his incantation, he wiped the remaining blood on Draco's skin away with his robe and started the procedure again to close the wounds. Slowly, Draco seemed to be regaining his senses, and when Severus had managed to close the gashes Potter had caused with Severus's curse, after repeating the incantation a third time, he helped Draco to his feet, lifting him up to spare him the waste of strength. He felt relieved that he had been so close by, relieved that Draco hadn't died of his wounds, Merlin knew what the Unbreakable Vow would have done to Severus – he hadn't thought of that in quite some time. And what would Lucius have felt? Another thing he hadn't thought about much lately.
"You need the hospital wing," said Severus, dripping with bloody water, and being soaked even more by holding Draco up. "There may be a certain amount of scarring, but if you take dittany immediately we might avoid even that … come …"
He helped Draco to the door and remembered suddenly who was the reason for all the blood and Draco's hammering heart and the cold fury in Severus's stomach. He turned round to Potter who was rooted to the flooded floor, staring at Severus with wide, terrified eyes. "And you, Potter … you wait here for me," said Severus and almost wished for Potter to disobey, so he could hunt him down and jinx some sense into him.
On their way to the hospital wing, they didn't exchange even one word, Draco perhaps for shame or embarrassment or merely because he was still shaken by what had happened, Severus because his mind was busy figuring out where Potter had learned his Sectumsempra. At first he thought that Potter might have seen him use it, but then again, Potter had never seen him in a duel and somehow Potter hadn't seemed as though he had planned to slash Draco to bits. He had seemed horrified with what he had done, struck dumb with the shock. Which meant he hadn't expected that the spell he had used would have this effect. Which meant again that he must have heard, or read about it, which was impossible because Severus had invented the spell and the only place where he had ever noted it down was –
"For Merlin's sake!" cried Madam Pomfrey when Severus and Draco finally reached the hospital wing and she bustled towards them at once, taking over the task of supporting Draco to lead him to a bed. "What has happened to him?"
Severus tried to collect his thoughts for he felt as though he had been close to something crucial. "He was in a fight, I closed his wounds but you should put some dittany on them, we don't want any scarring. And do give him something for the nerves, he looks as though he is going to faint. He has lost a lot of blood, so some Replenishing is in order."
"A fight?" asked Madam Pomfrey shrilly as she ordered Draco to change into a hospital pyjama. "This looks like slightly more than a mere fight among teenagers!"
"A duel among teenagers, then! This is all I can tell you, I wasn't present," said Severus irritably, looking into Draco's dull grey eyes. "I shall speak to the Headmaster about this as soon as he returns, and I ask you again to do as I said, I shall come back to look after Mr Malfoy later."
Draco averted his eyes and, with a last long look at him, Severus turned on his heel to return to the bathroom Potter would still be waiting in, if he knew what was good for him. And indeed, there he was, when Severus entered, standing in the reddish flood of water with that same expression on his face. Only now did Severus notice that there was someone else in the room, Moaning Myrtle who was sobbing and wailing at her best. Severus closed the door behind him and told Myrtle to leave, causing her to disappear in a nearby toilet, leaving the room silent. Silent enough for Potter to justify himself.
"I didn't mean it to happen," said the boy and just as Severus had thought he would. "I didn't know what that spell did."
But Severus wouldn't let him get away with such a petty excuse. Did the boy think he could cast spells in all directions, spells whose effect he didn't even know, without suffering the consequences? No, certainly not. He didn't even have any business knowing Sectumsempra, and somehow the only person Severus could think of, who could have told Potter the incantation, was Remus. And yet, wouldn't the werewolf have explained what the spell did? Would he have told Potter about it at all, even though he disapproved of it? It was Dark magic, after all … but where from could Potter know it, then? It rang a bell when Severus thought about the only place he had ever written it down in … it had been a book.
"Apparently I underestimated you, Potter. Who would have thought you knew such Dark magic? Who taught you that spell?"
"I – read about it somewhere," said the boy and guilt was springing out of his face to throw itself at Severus's feet.
"Where?" asked Severus and very suddenly, as though a bolt of lightning had brought it, the memory of a conversation popped into his head, one that had made Potter's sudden talent at Potions absolutely plausible, a conversation with Remus in which he had told him about an old Potions book that Potter had found, a book that had been written in. And though Remus had not been able to remember whom it had belonged to, Severus was sure it had been his very own, he was sure now, while Potter still tried to make something up.
"It was – a library book. I can't remember what it was call–"
"Liar," interrupted Severus coldly, for he knew that this spell was nowhere to be found, only in that particular Potions book that Potter had been using to deceive Slughorn all this time. He knew that it was the Half-Blood Prince who had scribbled instructions and improvements into the book, who had written his very own spells on the pages, because it had been his favourite pastime at school. And there was Potter, adorning himself with plumes he had borrowed – no – stolen from Severus without even knowing it. Fury was building up inside Severus, and when he stared into Potter's eyes, Legilimency his loyal partner, he was determined to find evidence in them that would discredit the boy in front of Slughorn as well as in front of Albus, for a reasonable boy didn't use a spell he didn't know to defend himself from a fellow student. And there it was, right at the front of Potter's pathetically weak mind, the book Severus had expected to see, Advanced Potion-Making. Severus withdrew from Potter's mind and saw the fear in his emerald eyes.
"Bring me your schoolbag, and all of your school books. All of them. Bring them to me here. Now!"
The words had barely left Severus's lips when Potter turned and dashed away through the water and out of the door, his running steps dying away in the distance. Immediately it seemed very unwise to have let him go alone and Severus scolded himself for not accompanying him to his very bed and searching his things right there. But what was done was done, and he had to hope for some mistake or stupidity on Potter's side while he paced the length of the bathroom, vanishing the bloody water and repairing the pipes as he did so. Even though he had a primitive wish of destroying everything around him.
Potter returned fifteen minutes later, out of breath and looking guiltier than ever. Severus held out his hand and the boy gave him his bag which Severus opened and took out one book after the other, opening them, leafing through them, until he reached the Potions book which was not, as Severus had hoped, the old one he had written in. But someone else had written in this one. Someone called Roonil Wazlib.
"This is your copy of Advanced Potion-Making, is it, Potter?" asked Severus, anticipating the lie he knew was coming.
"Yes," panted Potter, apparently having run all the way to and from his common room. But if that was true, he had taken a few detours, judging by the amount of time it had taken him to return to the bathroom. He had probably disposed of the old book on the way.
"You're quite sure of that, are you, Potter?" asked Severus, though he knew that he would receive no different answer.
"Yes," replied Potter defiantly.
"This is the copy of Advanced Potion-Making that you purchased from Flourish and Blotts?"
"Yes," repeated Potter firmly, and Severus decided that those had already been three chances too many.
"Then why," asked Severus with a slight feeling of triumph, "does it have the name 'Roonil Wazlib' written inside the front cover?"
He saw and enjoyed the surprised shock in Potter's features. And Severus laughed inwardly at his pitiful attempt to deceive him. "That's my nickname."
"Your nickname," repeated Severus disbelievingly, not quite sure if he had given Potter credit for too much intelligence after all.
"Yeah … that's what my friends call me," said Potter stupidly.
"I understand what a nickname is," said Severus. I'm sure you know mine very well, Potter, I'm sure of it, he thought angrily, looking into Potter's eyes once again, though he needed no proof of the fact that he was lying bluntly. "Do you know what I think, Potter? I think that you are a liar and a cheat and that you deserve detention with me every Saturday until the end of term. What do you think, Potter?" And, indeed, the boy could count himself lucky that Severus didn't drag him into court for attempted murder.
"I – I don't agree, sir," said Potter, trying to avoid Severus's eyes. But what he said counted nothing, and he could only hope that the Headmaster didn't think Severus's punishment too slack.
"Well, we shall see how you feel after your detentions," said Severus, wondering if Potter had actually thought he would get away with a slap to the hand. He probably had. After all it wouldn't have been the first time. But Severus would put an end to that. There were limits to everything. Nobody could slice up Draco and get away unscathed, not while Severus was there. "Ten o'clock Saturday morning, Potter. My office." And Severus got another tiny surge of satisfaction when Potter realised that this Saturday was –
"But, sir … Quidditch … the last match of the –"
"Ten o'clock," whispered Severus, smiling malignantly, incredulous that Potter even hoped that Severus would actually care. "Poor Gryffindor … fourth place this year, I fear …" Though what he actually feared, when he left the bathroom, was the usual Gryffindor miracle.
But despite his anger at all Gryffindors, Severus remembered a promise he had made to one of them and in the evening after having showered and changed into clean robes and checking up on Draco, who only gave him a mumbled thanks but looked fine and unscarred, he flooed to Remus's house and sprayed soot all over the werewolf who was sitting on a sheep fur on the floor in front of the fireplace beside a tea tray with a brand new book in his hands. Remus coughed a little and put his book on the coffee table as he stood up to welcome Severus.
"You are late," he said in his hoarse voice and he pulled Severus into a tender kiss. "And you seem angry again."
"I have all reason to be angry!" snapped Severus, starting to pace just to let off some steam that he would otherwise have let loose on Remus. "Draco and your precious Potter dueled in a bathroom and it ended in bloodshed and detentions."
"Is Harry all right?" asked Remus worriedly and Severus rounded on him, angrier than ever.
"Why, of course you would believe it was Potter who ended up bleeding, but I must disappoint you, Professor Lupin, your favourite student slashed Draco with a spell he shouldn't even have known! And all because you couldn't remember the name of the person whose book he found all those months ago!"
Remus gave him a bewildered look, rubbing his neck thoughtfully. "Well, that's just as terrible and of course I will correct myself and ask how Draco is," he said and when Severus had assured him that the boy was fine he continued, "But I'm afraid I don't understand what that has to do with a book and a name that I told you about, half a year ago."
Severus took a deep breath and decided to get proof after all. "Did the name that Potter asked you about happen to be 'Half-Blood Prince'?"
Remus raised his eyebrows. "Why, yes, now that you mention it," he said with a vague smile, "I found it funny because I thought he wanted to name himself that, and then he wondered if his father might have used that name –"
"Ha!" exclaimed Severus forcefully, startling Remus once again. "His father! As if his father had had the skill to invent those spells, as if he had been able to improve the whole bloody book! If Potter knew the truth about that book, he would throw it into the fire in disgust!"
And Remus needed not be told or explained anything, he understood the moment Severus mentioned the invention of spells. "So … you are the Half-Blood Prince?" he asked interestedly, smiling in a way that made Severus uncomfortable. He averted his eyes but Remus didn't let it rest, naturally. "Well, my nickname is rather clear, I believe, but that you would pick the name 'Prince' surprises me."
"Nobody but myself called me that. But if you must know," hissed Severus indignantly, only widening Remus's smile, "it is my mother's maiden name, and thus rather suitable for a pun. Which is not the point!"
"I find out new things about you all the time," said Remus pleasantly, "I find that a very good point. Though I still don't understand what all that has to do with –"
"I was coming to that!" said Severus impatiently, stopping his pacing to look at Remus and see the disappointment in Potter on his face. "I wrote down my Sectumsempra incantation in my copy of Advanced Potion-Making when I invented it, while we were still at school, obviously, and Potter, in his unending wisdom, read it and tried it out on the next best enemy without even knowing what it would do! If I hadn't been nearby when it happened, Draco would be dead by now and Potter on his way to Azkaban!"
Indeed Remus's face fell and he looked as though Severus had just brought him the news that he was, after all, in allegiance with the Dark Lord. He sank down on the arm of the sofa, staring into Severus's face quite incredulously. "Sectumsempra?" he asked quietly and Severus nodded curtly. "Merlin, anything could have happened, they were both immensely lucky that Harry wasn't aiming at Draco's neck."
"And Potter was actually scandalised that I put him in detention every Saturday until the end of term," said Severus angrily.
"I am sure he was shocked and ashamed, Severus, you cannot accuse him of intentionally cutting Draco," said Remus but at Severus's glare he added, "But of course you were right to punish him for his recklessness."
"And I could also have punished him for fraud, had I actually found the book in his possession," growled Severus bitterly. "Making everybody believe it was him who performed so well in Potions, while he was only doing what I had found out! He has probably been using my spells for ages!"
He felt Remus's hand on his arm and feared that the werewolf would scold him for feeling angry about Potter using his talent to pretend he had one of his own, but Remus did not scold him. "It wasn't your fault that Harry injured Draco," he said and Severus felt a guilty stab in his stomach that he had ignored so far. "You couldn't help that he found the book and used the spells you had written in it."
"What are you talking about?" spat Severus defiantly. "I know it isn't my fault!"
But Remus smiled, for he understood the irrational feeling of responsibility Severus was now experiencing. "You see, when I joined the werewolf pack, I met some fellows who had joined only a short time before and they blamed me for the new werewolf legislation that had been passed after my employment at Hogwarts. They said it was my fault that the Ministry forced werewolves to identify themselves to employers because I had taught at Hogwarts undetected and run wild in the grounds. At first I felt responsible –"
"What a surprise," drawled Severus.
"But after a while I realised that I couldn't have known that such a legislation would be passed, that I only did what I loved and what I had to do and that, despite my slight carelessness, I could not control the actions or decisions of others, even though they might have been caused by my own actions and decisions. It is not my fault that that legislation was passed or that those people joined Greyback. All that happened because other people made decisions that I could not influence, they might as well have thought that I was a good teacher and that werewolves can be trusted, after all. Harry might as well have thought that the Half-Blood Prince is not to be trusted or that his spells should be treated with special caution."
Severus heard him out and was rewarded with a smile and entire absolution. He snorted, tracing Remus's jaw line with his fingers. "Thank you," he said ironically, even though he actually meant it.
"You are always very welcome," said Remus brightly. "Though I would like to see Harry's face when he realises that it was you who taught him all those things, since he spoke very highly of your book-self when he talked to me."
"There was nothing good in the boy who wrote in that book," muttered Severus, lowering himself on the sheep fur Remus had apparently conjured. "And he was not to be trusted."
Remus walked round the table to look down at Severus with his kind smile. "He would have needed a guide, and the only problem was that he found none."
Remus had no idea how right he was. And, Severus thought bitterly, the only person who could have guided him had turned away. Not Remus, though, he wouldn't turn away, and if he did, Severus's pleas would bring him back, would not be repelled and ignored. Yes, even if everything changed, their love would not. Severus gave Remus a rare smile – though not so rare lately – and reached for his hand. "I do like these robes on you," he said softly, "I must compliment myself on my good taste."
Remus chuckled and sat down beside Severus, shoulder to shoulder. "Mr Blotts liked them too, though I believe Mr Flourish didn't even notice, he doesn't usually notice these things, which is a great advantage for me."
Severus overlooked the remark about Mr Blotts liking Remus's appearance and stretched out on the sheep fur, putting his head on Remus's lap. "Speaking of the book dealers, I see you used my gold, after all, to buy yourself a book."
"Oh, yes," said Remus, forgetting his startled smile at what Severus had just done and picking up the fancily designed book from the table behind him, "thank you, it was just enough. And I feel a little guilty at being so squandering with my money, I should have bought food."
Severus waved a dismissive hand and closed his eyes. "If you need more, just ask, or come to Hogwarts for dinner," he said lazily. "So will you tell me what book it is?"
Remus hesitated for a moment. "Well, it's a novel," he said vaguely. "I haven't heard you calling me a sappy Gryffindor in quite a while now –"
"Now, don't accuse me of neglecting you, I am absolutely sure that I said something like that the other day," insisted Severus and felt the suppressed chuckle in Remus's stomach.
"I miss these things sometimes, forgive me," said the werewolf, amused. "But I am sure I will hear you say it again tonight."
"Is it a romantic novel?" asked Severus with a smirk, though he had never seen such a novel in Remus's shelves and he felt an annoying embarrassment in his body.
"Not exactly," said Remus, his voice void of any embarrassment, "it is more complex than that. It is about courage, adventure, mystery and cleverness. And there is just a hint of love in it, just the right amount."
"Remus Lupin the literary critic," said Severus, now feeling pleasantly tired and comfortable. "Read it out to me already."
"Are you serious?" asked Remus surprised. "You want me to read to you?"
Severus smiled and couldn't imagine anything he would like better now than Remus's wonderful hoarse voice, rich with the task of making the words live, reading a story to him that he obviously enjoyed. "Yes, please."
"All right, then," agreed Remus, sounding happy as he opened the book and put a cup of tea into Severus's hands that were folded on his stomach. Then he cleared his throat and began to read and after a few words, Severus wondered if Remus was actually telling Severus's story or if the author could really know him and what he felt so well. "'He knew that he only had this one moment. He heard it in the rushing of his blood in his ears that deafened him for all other sound that might have surrounded him, he felt it in the prickling of his skin as though he were standing under a waterfall whose spray was like needles, and by the nonexistent weight that pressed down on his shoulders as if he must support heaven itself, making him stagger as he moved forward. There was no oxygen in the breaths he took, no water in his mouth when he swallowed, no ground underneath his feet when he stepped and no light to his eyes when he blinked. There were only words on his mind and his tongue as he thought, words he knew well, words he had formed so many times without ever uttering them, and these words were what mattered in this very moment. And had he had oxygen and solid ground and light he would have exchanged them gladly for the power to speak."
