DISCLAIMER: The characters of InuYasha are not mine. They are property of Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Musings

Death sucks.

Kagome sat heavily down upon her couch and kicked off the black high heels on her feet. She rubbed the ache from them as she stared pensively in front of her, seeing nothing that was really there. Her babies, as if sensing her downward spiraling mood, offered sweet, soft greetings and then either left her to be on her own or curled up close by in case she needed them.

It really, really sucks.

She'd received word a few days before. Ayumi's eldest had died tragically in a car accident. She'd known him well and it was still hard for her to face the fact that Hayato was gone. Harder still for Ayumi….

Feeling herself choking up again, Kagome stood on shaky feet and made her way to her bedroom. She almost angrily flung off the clothing she'd worn to the funeral. He was so young….

Throwing on whatever comfort clothing she came across, Kagome returned to her vigil in the living room. Ayumi knew she was an open line if she needed anything, but her family was surrounding her now and Kagome didn't want to get in the way. Had leaving her been the right thing to do?

Growling and cursing to herself at whatever mistakes she might have made with one of her best friends during her time of suffering, Kagome closed her eyes and gave herself over to grief.

*SCTD*

Sesshoumaru had known she was attending the funeral today. Business had kept him away, but he'd returned as soon as possible. Knowing his miko would be hurting, Sesshoumaru had rushed to her home as soon as he'd been able. He was well versed in pain.

He knocked and then let himself in, as had become the norm. Her home was dark, but not so dark his youkai eyes could not see her sitting in perfect stillness on the couch. Kagome had been crying, clearly, but the tears seemed to have dried up for the time being. She raised her eyes at his entrance and his heart clenched at the pain he saw there. "How do you do it?" she asked, a catch in her voice.

"How does this one do what, Kagome?" he asked slowly and calmly. Something inside him knew where this conversation was going and he wasn't sure he wanted to deal with it.

"Keep on going. I know you now. You're...you're feeling. You," she broke, closing her eyes as fresh tears fell down her face. Shaking her head to get herself under control, Kagome continued, "You're very human, for lack of a better word. Sorry. I can't find the right words for what I want to say right now." At that, she gave an injured laugh. "Some writer I am."

After a pause, Kagome gave another weak laugh. A moment's silence prompted her to continue. "How do you continue on, making attachments to things that don't last and stay moving forward when they are gone?"

He did not miss that she associated humans as things.

Closing his eyes, Sesshoumaru found a memory he hadn't reminded himself of in a long, long, long time. It was of Rin, perfect Rin. Crouching before tomb stones, Rin had asked, in her sweet voice, if he would remember her when she died. More unable to deal with that topic then than he was he was now, he'd dismissed Rin without a true reply. He believed he'd called her stupid for even thinking such things.

Her peaceful passing of old age had nearly torn him apart.

"This one has done what he has always done, miko. Carried on."

Rin had died, her heart for him still in her eyes. He had been by her side as her life failed her and held her hand long after it had gone cold. Jaken had passed on, ever loyal and ever loving to his Sesshouma-sama. He'd buried the kappa himself and held vigil over the grave. There had been others, too many to name, who had come close to him during his lifespan and they were all gone, as well. Only one he held close now. And it was Kagome, his miko.

"You make it sound easy," she replied to his answer. "Just carry on and everything will be alright."

Sesshoumaru moved forward and seated himself next to her tense body. Though her body language said otherwise, Sesshoumaru maneuvered himself until he was able to hold her close. When the fight gave out, he lifted her and cradled Kagome in his lap. Burying his face into her scent, he breathed deeply and reassured himself that she was still hale and hearty. Death did not nip at her toes.

"It is not easy," he replied. "It never is."

*SCTD*

Safely ensconced within the arms of her youkai, Kagome felt an easement. It was as if all the pain arrowing towards her had been redirected. It was amazing what love could do. She leaned heavily into his strength, knowing Sesshoumaru had more than enough for both of them and ashamed that she needed him for that. She should be strong on her own, too. "I'm sorry," she said, almost breaking down again. "I laid everything at your feet. Everything. And you have nothing to do with anything."

"Your pain is mine, Kagome," Sesshoumaru assured her, the deep timbre of his voice rushing through her to her core. His voice was so evoking.

"But it's not your fault and I wanted to blame you somehow. It was childish of me."

"You are human," he countered.

"And I will die," she returned.

There was a moment of silence, his body stiffening underneath her. Kagome feared he would say nothing, but, in this case, nothing might be better. "Yes," he finally admitted. There was a tone in his voice that she hadn't heard before. It was resolute. "And this one will be with you until the end of your days and then I, Sesshoumaru, will mourn you as I have no other."

Fin.

A/N: Sorry. No funny. Purely a therapeutic piece. My cat's addition to this piece, btw, was "iuuuuuuukikkkkkkkkkkkkkkkko" and it came right after I wrote Sesshoumaru's line of her pain being his. I was so tempted to somehow work it in, lol. So very tempted.

-LC