That's right! I'm alive! I'm so sorry for the really late update!!! T.T I really apologize, but I was on tests time, then my muse escaped… But after almost a month, I'm finally back! Thanks for waiting! Please review and let me know if my fighting descriptions need to improve and suggestions about it, for I really ought to get better at them. And for your patience, I shall dedicate this chapter to you all. :) I have promised I would finish this, and I intend to comply!

Information note:

For those as ignorant as me, Dorset is a county in the Southwest of England on the English Channel coast. For more information, go to Wikipedia.

Just Believe

And just like that, they seemed to simply vanish; though truth was Diego was running; and just like he told Kisa, he was way faster than shunpo users.

Meanwhile, in Rukongai Districts 4,5,7,9 and 12, there was chaste havoc.

Gargantuan explosions happened all over those districts, simultaneously. Those were reiatsu attacks; but there was something odd about those reiatsu presences, Soi Fon noted. Not only were they powerful enough to cause thus damage and still be unperceivable by her keen senses, these two reiatsu were different from anything she had seen before; their presence felt different from the usual reiatsu she knew.

Just what is going on here? – Soi Fon mused while frowning deeply.

The Squad 2 searched endlessly but found nothing except for the debris the clash of those two unknown reiatsu left behind.

Kisa and Diego Santiago appeared in the forest where everything started after only 8 seconds of leaving 4th Division's quarters. That's how amazing his speed was.

Kisa's grip on Santiago's coat was as tight as her closed eyes. Her head was pressed against his chest and she suppressed her shudders. She had never felt like that before. It was like the air was pressing her body against Santiago's advancing form.

-It's alright. – Diego said with a very neutral voice tone; completely unnerved by those speeds or by her tight grip on his clothes.

-What in the world are you?! – She tried to yell, but since she was still recovering her breath her tone was far lower than she would have wanted it to be.

-Your guardian. – He answered with the same neutral features and the way he said it made it seem as if that answer was automatic, as if he had just been asked how much is two times two.

-Let me down, please. – She said once she realized she was being carried in his arms… She didn't like it; she had just discovered so. It made her feel too vulnerable and the circumstances demanded her to not look vulnerable in front of him if she wanted answers.

He let her down without anything to say about it or oppose her request. He followed orders without questioning them.

Kisa looked around and immediately knew where he had taken her. She honestly didn't quite understand what she was supposed to do or how he would prove what he said was the truth by abducting her.

-Why the forest? – She asked with an arching brow.

-Before actually fighting you need to believe that you can do it; if not you will only react on self defense, in your fighting instinct.

-See that's the first thing that doesn't make sense. – She pointed out with a confused face that scowled slightly. – How come I could just use fighting moves when I don't even remember knowing them?

-You know them, and your skills were that great Kisana. – He answered. – You developed an instinct of a fighter in which you can do even if you weren't conscious. You used to be able to do them asleep.

-That's ridiculous! – She exclaimed with a somewhat mad tone. – I'm no fighter! I cannot even defend myself!

-I know that you don't believe it, which is not good Kisana, for it only weakens you; giving like that a chance to your own power to rebel because of using your pure instinct. That's why your Hikyo is untamed and therefore takes over you so easily.

She gawked but no sound was emitted from her throat… Was it just her or did she just hear two puzzle pieces fit in together?

-As I said. – He continued. – You don't believe me, but you have to believe me for you to understand, Kisana. If you refuse to listen and believe, you won't get anywhere close to understanding this all; and you're delaying the comeback of your memory. – She looked at him with confused and sad eyes. - That is why I will now let you see for yourself the images of you fighting.

-B-But how do you plan on doing such thing…? – She asked with a very low voice tone and a lost glare.

-As your guardian, Kisana, I can show you what I see and what I know without the need to actually talk.

-But… - She meant to interrupt…

Her speaking came to a sudden halt with the touch of Diego Santiago's extended left hand over her forehead.

He closed her eyes and she, although she tried to resist, also closed her eyes shut.

Her mind suddenly started to receive these strange images she was sure she hadn't seen while blank…

She was seeing something akin to a movie, yet it felt more realistic than that. She could feel the breeze that her eyes saw on the film and the tall grass brushing against her calves, like the grass from the scene she watched.

She saw someone who looked unbelievably similar to herself… But she was staring at herself as if she were another different entity… She was seeing her as Diego Santiago did.

There was this girl, whom she believed it was her, standing in an unfamiliar background that resembled a field; her hair reached past her hips and loose. She couldn't believe her eyes…Or Diego Santiago's eyes.

This Kisa she saw wore a black leather outfit; a really short skirt and a sleeveless blouse with a deep, square cleavage. She had long black flat, buckle adorned boots that reached her knees. She had so many accessories! She had two crossed belts with exaggeratingly notorious metallic loops that held her skirt, a pair of long elbow-reach, fingerless gloves; chains hanging from her tight blouse; which had laces in the middle, similar to a corset. But the most noticeable add-on was a thick leather necklace that had a metallic buckle in the front and was tight to her neck, from it hanged a single necklace pendant; it was diamond shaped and had a height of about 4 cm (2.5 in), and it consisted of a black onyx stone with flat surface, surrounded by a white gold frame that accentuated its diamond outline, and in the stone there was a white kanji that read "six" in the middle. It was a style similar to gothic… Which our bashing Kisa considered quite uncharacteristic of her; ergo it was hard to believe that was actually her… (Sure, she liked black, but…)

Anyhow, the reason she really, really couldn't believe that was her was not because of the conspicuous outfit, it was because of her face. If she thought Santiago's face was cold, well, she had just seen an ice frozen face that resembled hers with disturbing exactitude. Those eyes that were supposed to belong to her were emotionless, scheming, pondering, yet truly saddening.

The observing Kisa noticed the figures that surrounded her gothic-adorned image. There were about 10 men that were covered in black.

Why are they surrounding the other me there? – Kisa thought as she looked closely with concentration she didn't know she could reach.

That was the last thought she had before watching in amazement the rest of the flashback Santiago was showing her.

The observed girl with long ash brown hair actually fought!

The first man came to attack her frontally and Kisa, too fast for normal eyes' rhythm, suddenly appeared 5 steps forward, the man now behind her back fell on his face. Only when he lied on the floor did Kisa notice the bleeding that came from his stomach. She had defeated him by punching through his stomach in less than a second. Her face was neutral and her glare scheming and showing no emotion at all for just having hurt a man.

Then another 2 men came to attack her with their raised fists. The girl turned around slowly and unworriedly as the two men approached her. She then raised her right leg and without moving from her spot, she kneed one of them in the lower torso and at the same time she extended her left palm and with the side of it, she hit the neck side of her other attacker. The two fell unconscious to the floor. Not a sweat drop over her forehead as she nonchalantly lowered her leg and her arm without breaking her perfectly upright position. She had knocked both out with two simultaneous movements that took one second. She didn't seem to have hit them that hard, yet she applied enough strength to those hits without showing it outwardly.

5 other men stepped forward to attack. All 5 unsheathed their swords and raised their blades high to bring them down upon her. The first man that tried to bring his cutting blade upon the serious-looking girl, missed. She moved too rapidly for his eyes. She had ducked and was now at the level of his chest as she elbowed him in the chest and immediately bent down a bit more until her left hand found support on the ground as her extended right leg made a circular movement and knocked to the floor 2 men with that single clockwise kick. She then straightened up using her left hand on the floor to impulse her up. She was halfway to reaching her upright position as she skillfully jumped into the air and kicked the other two men; that were about to attack her from both sides; using both of her legs and in a quick movement she hit both of their necks in less than half a second and landed on the floor, quickly reassuming her upright stance. No signs of effort on her steady breathing as she was surrounded by those 8 bodies.

Two more men were there staring at her gravely and she seemed as if she didn't care about their glares at all.

One man stepped up front and shot her a reiatsu attack using kido and a great blasting energy sphere was headed towards her. She slowly extended her right arm to the front and without any effort stopped it in its course.

She then closed her hand into a fist sluggishly and managed to null the kido attack completely.

She then seemed to vanish; just like Kisa and Santiago had vanished from the 4th Squad…Or maybe even faster. Then the girl appeared in front of the attacker and in a sudden movement hit his neck's side and then her arm returned to her side in less than half a second.

One more man was standing. He shunpoed behind her and she reacted quickly by moving out of his zanpakuto's way. The man shot a kido blast to her direction and she avoided it without problem as she shoot a kido blast of hers to his direction. He blocked it with his zanpakuto, that was his shield. When he moved the zanpakuto that covered him out of his eyesight he noticed the girl had shunpoed to his front and she immediately headed a punch to his face which he almost avoided and got hurt on the head. She narrowed her expressionless eyes. Apparently, it wasn't like her to not hit accurately. He used his zanpakuto to attack her but she shunpoed and appeared at his back and kicked him in the back but he stood up again even though blood spilled from his mouth and was trickling down to his chin. She gave a step forward and he jumped into the air and was about to head an attack of his zanpakuto to her, but she reacted faster than that and appeared behind him, suspended in the air and kicked his shoulder. He landed badly on the floor with a dislocated shoulder that didn't allow him to use his zanpakuto. As he was noticing so, she threw one fist to him lying on the ground straight to his stomach. And that time, she showed a slight movement in her arm as she raised it a bit before punching the man's stomach. She got impulse and, therefore, the impact was so great it killed him.

Blood spilled from 10 bodies on that ground as she walked closer to where Diego Santiago was standing from. So Kisa got a good look at her other self.

She was in awe. Such lithe movements require more effort than that girl she saw had shown, and after that, not even a trace of sweat was on her body… Was that really her?

And before she knew anything else, she snapped back into reality.

Diego Santiago had removed his palm from her brow. Kisa felt sweat dripping by the side of her forehead.

Without giving her time to think through what she had just seen, he talked:

-A Hasumei Dragon can move effortlessly even at 10 times the speed of sound. A Dragon is able to apply great strength in their attacks without using any impulse to increase the impact force on the opponent; for they possess a natural inhumane strength. You are dexterous in combat; and can fight any kind of weapons without any yourself. Many times, you don't need them to fight back. You are apt to fight almost any kind of fight, using a great diversity of attacking options. You can fight kido easily as well. You don't always have to use it back to attack. You can use kido yourself and excel at it, as well as many other fighting styles you have. Your reflexes react fast. A Hasumei Dragon is a warrior, Kisana; a warrior with power beyond what you may consider powerful at this moment. What you just witnessed is what I have seen many times in different occasions and does not represent a percentage anywhere close to what your true power can do. – Kisa was in such awe and breathless that she couldn't gasp, but she felt a great urge to do so. - You are a fighter, Kisana. A fighter that is not to be underestimated by anyone; which means you don't underestimate yourself either. Are you starting to believe this? – He asked with serious eyes.

-But what in the world?! – She jerked as she screamed frenetically after 5 seconds of silence; her hands were on both sides of her head and she gazed down, unable to blink. – Who were all those people?! Why were they attacking me?! Was that even me?! – She asked nonstop and in one breath.

-Kisana. – Diego frowned slightly yet his eyes were still emotionless. – Those were men that persecute you in behalf of superior orders.

-Who? – She asked impatiently.

-Before I advance any further and give you information you're not able to understand, answer me. Are you starting to believe it, Kisana? Do you believe now that you're a fighter?

She looked down and got pensive.

-That couldn't possibly have been me. – Those were the only 6 words that parted from her mouth…

-Yes, it was you, Kisana. – Santiago frowned deeply yet he showed the same neutrality. – And you need not to doubt that or else you won't believe.

-But I do not understand! – She shouted. - Why did you show me that?!

-You needed to believe it and this seemed like the only way to make you see it. – He answered with his emotionless voice.

-But why do you want me to admit I'm a fighter?! What purpose would it serve if I did admit I'm an assassin?!

-That because now, you are again, what you saw in those images.

She arched an eyebrow and stared at him blankly; her glare saying 'Huh?' yet she still scowled.

-What you just saw, is what you have always been able to do, but up until now, you have only done it under the influence of your Hikyo. But now you are able to do it yourself, now that you have recognized you can do it, you will have less problems by defending yourself. – He explained…Needless to say he was inhumanely emotionless.

-I can now do those strange movements and all that I saw I could do there because you showed it to me? – She asked skeptically.

-You cannot do absolutely everything that you saw there yet. You're still to regain a lot of power, but although what you saw is nowhere close to your full power or any significant amount of the power you mastered, you still lack a bit more power to do that all, especially for the kido parts. However, you can do most of what you saw. Combat movements, you won't lack anymore. And you are not only going to be able to do that because you saw it and because you believe it, Kisana. I have appeared in your life. When I stopped the uncontrolled Meikurashizu you were going through, I had contact with you. And therefore, I awakened your senses a bit more. That's why you no longer need the Hikyo to do it for you in its uncontrolled rebelliousness. It should be helpful to control it while you remember how to tame it…

-By contact do you mean the hug? – She asked. – Now that I think about it, your behavior last time I only saw it for brief seconds, yet I can tell it dissents a lot from the personality you manifest right now… Why? And why is it that in my dream you also seemed to act like you did on the bridge that day? Your voice was different and you talked to me more openly… What is it that it is restricting you now?

He remained silent.

-Why won't you answer me? – She asked with a menacingly serious tone.

Diego Santiago was now in an inner turmoil about how he could answer those questions without affecting his mission… He came up with an answer, and he knew his Mistress wouldn't like it, but his mission to protect her was far more important than his wish to be liked by her.

-I meant the kiss. – He answered after hesitating 3 seconds.

She gasped. Her irises contracted. Her mouth gawked. She brought her hands to her face and covered half of it, including her blushing cheeks. She gave a step back, just like she had at the bridge back at the Kuchiki manor.

-What did you just say? – She asked while fighting back the tears accumulating in her eye corners.

-I meant the kiss. – He obediently answered whilst his face showed no remorse in repeating them. – I had to do it in order for the Meikurashizu to stop; that's the way a guardian stops it.

She felt as if she had just been flailed. She felt awful. Her lips belonged to Byakuya and Byakuya only…! It was something she had buried deep within her heart ever since she knew her love for him was not unrequited; since that unforgettable night under the kiosk at the Kuchiki gardens… And listening to her guardian's sentence had just crushed it all like glass; and as if there was now broken glass, she felt her heart shedding blood tears.

-How could you…? – She sobbed but inwardly felt the most chaotic of all wraths.

-Not only were you in pain, if I didn't stop it, something dangerous was threatening to surface and then something that would have changed your definition of 'mayhem'! – He answered with a severe voice. – I am aware you don't like it, but I am here to protect you, not to be liked by you and I am not to allow such event to happen, or else you'd be greatly affected and not only would I fail to protect you as your guardian, your life itself would be at risk! – He finished harshly.

She fell on her knees and her hand left hand suppressed her sobbing as tears trickled down her cheeks; making her feel awfully vulnerable and terrible for not being strong enough to withhold them.

He was not unscathed by her tears… He could never be. And he wished he could just fall to his knees too when he recalled what he was to tell her yet, but knew that was a luxury he couldn't afford… Inside, he was high-strung. Outside, he knew he had to look firm. But it was the cause of her tears what tortured him the most…

But he was compassionate to her tears. He never showed compassion to anyone but her tears. So he decided to patiently wait until she could calm down a bit…

I'll wait for her to feel calmer, only to bring her back to her knees…In the best of all cases. – He mused with heavy duty over him; but after all the time he's had to deal with it, he had grown accustomed to it; nonetheless, there were times like this one he felt as if it was a new thing he couldn't handle… - It hurts deeply to know that my kiss can cause you this pain, Kisana, but if it is your wish for that not to happen, I shall do whatever it takes so it doesn't happen again…

What he didn't know was that the cause was actually different to what he thought it was…

Byakuya… - She thought with guilt and tears that were finally slowing down. – I'm so sorry… I was told you were there when this all happened… You had to watch that kiss, did you not? Please forgive my stupid hyperbole! Because I took things to a dangerous level after seeing Santiago, not only did I end up causing more trouble yet to everyone, but I also put him in a situation in which he kissed me and you had to watch… Even if I didn't mean to, I ended up hurting you… Oh Byakuya! I have to hurry and apologize! But have you even woken up yet? And what if you hate me when you wake up?! Please… Please forgive me for putting you through so many difficult situations… I know you were not in the best shape before I met you, but you were dealing with it… And I came only to make things worse for you… – She grinned sadly. – And here I am; saying the same old words; when I know that I still want to be with you… I'm such a selfish person… Byakuya, I am so confused like never before. Each statement he gives me as an answer only raises ten more questions. Byakuya, I cannot imagine the excruciating pain I'd feel if I'd watch you being kissed by someone else… So I'm hugely sorry, but I promise I'll make it up for you somehow… I'll do anything… Byakuya… Please, hurry and come back to me… I've never felt the urge to be in your arms this strong before… I've never felt you missing like I am right now… I've never needed you more than this… Please, I beg for you to let me see you again, soon… Please, I selfishly ask of you to give me some of your amazing strength to face this all… Would you accept me even as an assassin? I need to know, Byakuya… I NEED TO KNOW!

And as if it was magic, her tears came to a cease.

With her right arm, she tried to clean her dry tears; needless to say it failed miserably. However, after her arm was removed from her face, the sudden change was extraordinary.

Her face was firm once again. Her eyes were determined to be strong; it was as if she hadn't been crying. And like that, she rose from her knees, sluggishly.

This was something that actually surprised Diego Santiago! He had never seen this determined side of her in the whole time he had known her. It was so surprising that his eyes were wider and his lips parted; and that was the closest he'd ever be to gawking.

Could it be…? – He thought between amazement and disbelief. – I was aware you had changed, but… You have never before, as I recall, been able to just wipe away your tears in such a short amount of time… That's why you sealed away your ability to cry. You hadn't cried in a long time, but now you cry easily… However, you also get a hold of yourself faster than you used to… And instead of weak, you look, for a reason I cannot comprehend, stronger than you did when I first saw you at the basement… What could be in your mind that motivated you to stand again so quickly? Kisana, could it be that you have grown while you were here?

-If that is the case… – She started. – Then I thank you for doing it. – She said with earnest eyes that looked straight at his, and even beyond.

This was astounding to hear… He couldn't help the widening of his eyes, yet he reacted in time to control it again after a short instance… You've changed. – He expressed inwardly. – Have I really been away from your life for so long that I can no longer predict your thoughts like I could before?

-Do not thank me. As your guardian, it was my duty to do it. – He said with a light frown and then he inwardly sighed as to get ready for what he sure didn't want to say next but knew he had to. - There is yet another reason you have to believe this. Kisana, you have to fight again.

She looked at him with wide eyes as she gawked. Even her mind was in shock… She couldn't order her thoughts; so they made no sense… As soon as she heard him, she inwardly gasped out of horror and thousands of opposing thoughts bombarded her simultaneously. Did he just say she was to do that?! (…) Wait! Did he just say 'again'?!

-WHAT?!! – She shouted to the 4 cardinal points. – What did you just say?! I am not! I refuse!

-Kisana… - He was losing his short patience as the conversation went on; ergo his voice was, although emotionless, becoming harsher.

-Did you see those eyes?!! Santiago, I cannot seriously accept that I would kill and not even blink!

She could have stomped from her great anger; but she instead remained in shock. Nevertheless, her eyes were filled to the top with frustration and confusion and she was once again fighting her urge to cry; and this time she allowed just a single tear to flow; the rest were imprisoned. Diego Santiago felt anything but comfortable or indifferent towards her inner pain…

The Kisana he remembered the most seldom cried in front of him… He had no idea what to do to make the anxiety growing inside him, as he saw her pain, stop.

I ought to be the worst guardian… - He pondered realizing he couldn't show himself apathetic towards her touching tears. – I'm very sorry for being of little help to your real pain, Kisana… I'm sorry for failing you as your guardian; for I have never been able to console your heart or help you with what you really need me for… I know that deep inside you thought this. Even now I wish he was here… I would be the one to stick to the duty and help you in your outer battles and after I was done, I would walk away and he would step in to stop the tears you seldom shed… And if you did not shed them, I know many times they were just at the corner of your eyes as you fought them with your might… I am a failure as your guardian, Kisana… I hope you forgive me, My Mistress.

-Am I really a murderer? Am I that cold emotionless soldier? – She practically whispered as tears ran down her cheeks sluggishly.

"Kisana…" was what Diego wanted to say, but he didn't. He was clueless about what to say… He wasn't good at expressing himself…

-I cannot and I refuse to believe that I hurt those men like that! – She yelled upset.

-You did it in your own defense, Kisana. – He answered with his frown still present, as well as his voice; expressionless in its surface. – You have never been the kind to hurt others unless it is necessary.

-Why do you make it sound as if I was so cold that I saw them as mere things that require the spending of my energy?! Am I that freaking heartless?! I certainly do not believe this! – Another tear trickled down her right cheek. – Am I really a murderer, Santiago? – She said with a more normal voice tone, although it showed pain behind it, it sounded somehow lackadaisical… It lacked the cheerfulness, preoccupation or even the strong wrath it normally had other times… It was a voice that belonged to a tormented mind that was facing an unforeseen thunderstorm, so strong it didn't give her time to add emotion to her words…

Two tears escaped, but the rest were ensnared, but were still present in her eyes' surface. They added a dreary glint to them, and yet the effect they had felt as if they were rather faster than slower; more, instead of less… That pain she felt was noticeable for anyone who stared into her dark brown eyes. The fact that the paths those two tears that refused to back down left behind were still there only made it more heartbreaking; for the sluggishness with which they rolled down was somehow evocative of her former expectations about her past…

She had longed for a normal past. A family was what she yearned for. She had often wondered if her father would be the overprotective kind and if her mother was sweet or strong and firm, if she had had a pet; if it was a fish or maybe a dog; if she had any siblings; if they were younger or older than her; if she had a sister that shared her age that was really amazing like Tatsuki; or maybe an older brother like Taro, so wonderful and loving… She had yearned for a family and a home to return to…

And because those two tears were on her face more time than the other tears she had shed, it was redolent of the pain it caused her to know she'd have to let go of those former expectations and hopes; just like those tears didn't want to let go of Kisa's heartbreaking eyes that showed a heart-piercing stare.

He was not apathetic to her tears… He couldn't. He was cold, but he was her Guardian and she was His Mistress…

A guardian could never be cold towards his Mistress; he couldn't even want to be like that towards her. And that is no written rule; it's greater than any mandate. It's a part of who they are and what their mission is. A bond between a guardian and a mistress is very special and goes beyond most other bonds there could ever exist. A guardian makes it his mission to protect his mistress by his own will; it is not imposed on him. It becomes the reason of their existence. They live for their Mistress and for nothing else; that's how deep it really is.

Hence, Diego Santiago could not be indifferent to His Mistress's tears. The real problem was he couldn't come up with the right words to say but knew he was supposed to talk. And as pressing as the situation with His Mistress's pressingly expecting glare was, his thoughts drifted away to remote memories…

X Diego Santiago's Flashback X

There are two people sitting on the sand of Dorset's beach at sunset as the waves reached closed to their feet. However, the atmosphere around them was anything but romantic… It was even dreary…

-You were never a words person, were you ever, Santiago? – A girl with hair that reached the middle of her back asked smiling with understanding brown eyes.

Diego Santiago sat beside her on the sand as his eyes wandered into the horizon sky; painted red because of the setting sun… It was quite a picturesque scene to watch, yet the delight his eyes could have had wasn't tempting enough to break his pensive state… His mind had a grip on his thoughts vehemently, since this was a very serious matter.

He didn't raise an eyebrow at such assertion, yet he could have done it if his mind hadn't had been in a more relevant havoc.

-Why do you ask me that, Kisana?

-And again you do it… - She rolled her eyes. – Will you ever just call me 'Kisa'? – She questioned with a slightly playful tone and a brittle grin, yet she understood it wasn't the time to act playful at all.

Diego simply scowled and answered nothing as his eyes stared in the far horizon. She just sighed.

-You have never been a words person around me, but yet I know you well enough to know a part of what you're thinking, Diego Santiago. – She replied seriously; and she was very serious. She would only call him by both his given names under the effect of seriousness. – And right now, I know you wish you were one, so you could support Edward… I know you don't support my decision to leave either. – She looked at him and he looked back. Her gaze was firm but trying to be gentle with her spoken words at the same time.

-I am your…

-Guardian. – She finished his annoyingly familiar sentence as she rolled her eyes and kept them rolling. – And therefore you are to support me through every decision I make whether you agree or not… Yes, I know that, Santiago. You've said that endless times already; but that doesn't mean that you wish to support it. – She said gravely while she looked at the white sand around her feet as she was sitting, hugging her knees. – I am not asking you to support it, but I know you, and either way you'll end up supporting me, and Edward will as well… Yet, I want you not to be harsh on him because of his 'rebelliousness', as you call it. I understand him not wanting me to leave. And I even appreciate his honesty towards me, I'm not mad at him, you know? – She then looked up to his eyes, straightforwardly again. – And he is doing this out of despair… Deep inside he knows he won't change my mind. I'm going in two weeks; and I shall order him not to stop me… And I wonder if I'll have to give the same order to you as well.

He listened and his scowl only grew deeper and more expressive of the inner dilemma he was facing.

-I shall not stop you, since it is your wish to go.

She raised an eyebrow in disbelief and grinned; manifesting she definitely didn't think that was the end of his statement.

-Is that so?

-I cannot lie to you and you know it. – He answered and then looked into the infinite ocean with unaccountable red sparkles, so tiny but multitudinous. – I know you can take care of yourself… - She couldn't believe her ears… - However, I only wish to ask you one thing: - He then looked beside him at the attentive girl. - Why are you doing this?

She looked down for a moment and gazed at the waves that came back and forth; a bit hesitant to answer.

-I just feel like doing something to make everything up… - Then she mused for a minute and continued since Santiago kept his look expectant of her answer, but in a creepy manner, since he did it as he didn't know the concept of frustration. – I'm sorry, I know you hate it when I think like that, but I just can't help but feel as if I were the one that caused the death of some people in the past… I want to help others to make up for it.

-Kisana… - He meant to interrupt with a harsh voice that expressed his anger.

-But that's not the only reason… - She quickly continued. – I think I owe it to the man who taught me the most basic things in nursing. He gave me a gift… I just feel this urge to use it… I myself can't quite explain myself why.

They then stared at each other's orbs silently for an immeasurable amount of time.

-Very well. – Santiago said, breaking the casted spell of silence; that was not unbearable because of the sound of waves.

-Will you really not try to stop me? – She asked with narrow eyes and uncertainty inside those deep dark irises.

-Only if you want me to.

She laughed with no vivacity and no cheerfulness whatsoever.

-I'll be back in 3 months… Please do tell that to Santiago every time you think he's about to burst like he did today… - She asked with a grin and then her irises changed to imperial topaz as she looked into the sun; which was about to finish diving deep into the other side of the world and gave the illusion to be submerging down the sea's water.

-Of course, Kisana. – He replied formally as he nodded slightly.

-I'll read if I get the chance to do so, at sunset, like this. – She said smiling wider. – I'm taking it with me.

-Haven't you already read it twice? – He asked with his expressionless face.

-What can I say? – She giggled. – I like it… Plus, whenever I'll read it, I'll think of you.

-I appreciate the thought, but I would prefer if you could use that time to rest… I need you not to forget you must take care. I shall never let you go anywhere else alone if you come back with a severe lack of nutrition or sleep. – He warned with his harsh tone, but she was already used to it, and she heard the worry underneath it.

She smiled her genuine, wholehearted smile. The moment she did, the sun hid completely and the sky was dark above.

-I will. Thank you. – She whispered as she got up and he followed. – By the way, I want you to know I don't mind that you aren't very skilled with speeches. So please don't feel bad because you can't express yourself to the 4 directions of the wind as Edward can… You're Santiago and Edward is himself. I care for you both equally. – She said smiling feebly without lively eyes.

She then walked away and he fell behind from diving deeper into his pensiveness, but only for a short instance. It hadn't been a minute when he started to walk to the direction to which the sand path her footprints left behind.

Deeply, he didn't like her last sentence, but he had slowly embraced the situation… And if he could make her happy in ways he couldn't, then he was to accept him and help him as well.

X End of Diego Santiago's Flashback X

She was right that evening… He was no man with the gift of speech. He was a man of actions. When it came to finding words that could ease her tears; he was just no good… Nevertheless, for His Mistress, he'd try it again. For His Mistress, there was nothing he wouldn't repeat a thousand times, even if he had little faith in that working.

-Is being a guardian this imposing? – She asked him with eyes that showed sincere interest and compassion for these chains that he called 'his duty as a guardian.'

-Of course it is not like that! – He answered harshly; Kisa felt his offended tone underneath.

-Then what is being a guardian like? What does it mean to be one?

He sighed.

-That answer is very long and we are against the clock, Kisana. I don't know if they've already realized we're missing in the hospital. I seriously need you to understand and accept what I have been telling you. – He said uncharacteristically hastily. - I beg of you to believe so you can understand. – He pleaded.

Kisa couldn't believe her ears. It wasn't his words what had captivated her… It was the way he talked… It sounded so…Humane! He gave real emotion to his words! He showed was worried! Maybe he did so subtly, but he showed emotion, nonetheless!

As cold as he was by mere nature, he was now showing his worry about her.

Kisa felt so confused but she sensed his words were heartfelt… That was truly something… Yet she was now more yet more garbled than she was moments ago!

Ever since Diego's assertions started, they threatened to cause a conflict between her hopes and the reality she had ordered him to tell her; a reality she no longer wanted to know and was now realizing he was not hyperbolizing when he said it would bring her pain and suffering and that it wasn't going to be easy… Not that she thought he was bluffing in the first place, but still, she wasn't ready for this.

I have to let go of that… - She lectured herself inwardly. - I have to accept this all. If I want to know my real past, then I must let go of those lies and childish hopes about what my past could be… This fear of having a dark past had never been so immobilizing. It hurts, but I must be strong. I swore myself and the others I'd be strong and face this. I cannot be strong or useful if I just cry because things are not what I wish them to be. It hurts… But I must remember I'm doing this for Byakuya and the others. If I want to be with him, I must not menace his wellbeing. I'd rather go through this pain than the pain I just know I'd have if he ever stared at me with fear or precaution for his safety… Kisa! Be strong, for the love of peace! You must be! Don't you dare back off now like a bloody coward! (…) I wonder if this was what Santiago meant when he said I wasn't ready. Why do I feel like he meant something else? In what kind of merciless world could anything be harder to take than this? If I was supposedly ready to know this, then what is the bloody thing I'm not ready for?!

-How in the world could you expect me to understand something this complicated? – She asked with frustration beneath her voice.

-It won't be complicated anymore if you believe it. – Was his answer.

She looked up to the sky and got pensive… It was afternoon already. The clouds were moving with the nice breeze. The sun was warm but its heat was not intense… Not long ago, it was the middle of spring. She didn't know why, but she just loved staring at the endless blue cloak.

Now, that was something Diego did recognize… Even the one he remembered, as different as she was from the girl he was now observing, she loved staring at the sky, anytime, always.

She then, after a brief moment, looked at her guardian. His dark blonde hair looked breathtaking with the sunrays and although it was short, the wind could still play with it and moved it; just like it moves the grass. He was such a frustrating mystery… But he was not a bad person… She could tell that, and for the moment, that was enough for her to trust him.

-I find it hard to believe it… - She started with a serious and firm voice. - But I cannot deny that it felt somehow familiar, either…

Diego Santiago looked at her with his usual, grave face, but his eyes showed a snatch of relief. Hope was getting to him; there was hope that His Mistress and he could get to an understanding after all…

-But I just can't believe it… Was I really that heartless?

-That's what you had to be like, but in reality, you were not a bad person, Kisana. – He said with earnestness she perceived.

She smiled weakly.

-Then, would you please, show me a memory of yours in which I acted the way I really am? – She requested.

Diego said nothing. He simply stepped forward and then reached her with that single step, as if he had used shunpo… Definitely like that time in the bridge. He gently laid his extended right hand over her forehead and closed his eyes, and she followed without resisting.

He at first wasn't sure which memory to use, but his mind could only think of one… So they saw as if it were a virtual flick the flashback Diego Santiago's mind had drifted to minutes ago.

And when it was over, he removed his hand and she opened her eyes sluggishly and then looked at him straight in the eyes. Tears well up in her eyes and threatened to roll, but her gaze wasn't sad… She was even smiling.

-I believe you, Santiago… - She cried with joy. – If you say that I'm a fighter, then I am a fighter… But I am assuming that there's more to the reason I used a sword in my past, right?

He just nodded in response.

-Very well. Then would you tell me about it… - Santiago frowned deeper… The original purpose was more than just make her believe it… There was something he was still to do… She noticed that. – Whenever we have time? – She finished the question.

He looked at her with eyes that showed he didn't expect that correction.

-I realize we didn't come here for just that… You were going to show me I can do that now, right? But I honestly don't want to hurt anyone… And I really don't know if I want others to know just yet…

-No one else has to know yet. – He assured. – You can simply do it here, with me.

-You're asking me to fight with you? I somehow doubt that's realistic… – She chuckled with little humor.

-I am serious about this, Kisana. That's why I brought you here, to this open area; so we didn't cause damage to the hospital.

Kisa gazed down a bit and grinned slightly.

-That makes sense… - She simply said. – By the way… For the last time, just call me 'Kisa'. – She requested, already tired of being called Kisana that many times…

He frowned but was also tired of being told that over and over… So Diego sighed.

-Very well, if that is your wish, My Mistress, then I shall try my best…Kisa. – He finished with some effort…

-Don't get too worked up there. – She teased with a smile. – It'll get easier with time.