Bewildered: 4694-059

My darling, Artemisia. Raoul called today, but I didn't dare to pick up the phone and strangely, he didn't leave a message. I don't know what to say to him and if he would have some bad news about the court hearings, I wouldn't be able to take it. Not now at least. I feel I can hardly keep my thoughts on track and right now I must gather all the strength I have to be able to pull this through.

Damn it! How am I supposed to break into Hazall's… what… place, work, home…? I don't even know where to break in! And even if I did, what am I supposed to steal? Did he print the document out? I doubt it. I really doubt he managed to break the code and open it. With some luck… or logic rather… he has it still under the same name. If he doesn't, I could always search for
specific word content like "TrxG" or "Argonaut" or perhaps even "Iason Mink". Who knows. That's a minor problem. I need have no idea how to get to Hazall. I don't even now where he is at the moment.

I've been roaming the abandoned site again. If Miss Doh'ra heard me the first time, I bet she will get in contact with me. I wrote a tiny message saying; "Out of ideas… need help or deal is off!" It's 13'24 now. I will go for a walk and hopefully, by the time I come back she will have given me some signs of life. Otherwise, she can go to hell.

Time now is 18'45. Just came back with some coffee and a huge portion of passion cake. Yeah, yeah… who gives a damn about my health now? I have more important things to do. Anyway, as I suspected I have a message. She signed it this time too, with Agatha Doh'ra. Oh, that's sweet. Agatha is her name? Ha! Haven't heard anything so old fashioned in a loooooong time, but it's cute, I have to admit that. And guess what… this girl is full of surprises. The only thing she wrote is this:

"Dear Bunny-tush,

I hope you bought enough coffee and passion cake for me as well. I have a big appetite for sweet stuff… you included. So strap on that chastity belt of yours and make some room for me, for it'll be a long night.

Agatha D."

Cute no? She has obviously been following me for hours. Funny, on my way to the communicator to ask the concierge to bring up some more passion cake, coffee and perhaps some fruit, I passed by the large mirror near my bed and I actually stopped to take a look at my butt. She called me 'Bunny-tush'. I don't see the resemblance, but if that makes me cute or 'sweet' in her eyes, that's fine with me.

Well, the time is 19'10 and there's a knock on my door. I don't think I'll write more tonight. See you my darling.


Agatha: 4694-060

Agatha made herself comfortable the minute she came walking through my door. In fact she had been the one bringing up the order I had place just prior to her arrival. She seems very much like a no nonsense girl, but I did appreciate her crazy sense of humor - no matter how dirty it is and constantly alluding to sex. Well, there was a reason to that, and it was quite obvious she did fancy me and if I would 'play my cards right, we might round up the evening in a more pleasant way'. All right, I did stare at her features rather bluntly, so I guess she realized the feelings were mutual, hence her forwardness, but before I had the chance to decline her kind offer based on my past as a desexualized Eunuch, she continued; "And I don't want to hear about you not being capable just because you are a Eunuch. You have no idea how many guys like you I've had squealing beneath me."

I started laughing and she flashed me a warm smile. When it came to the planning, the contract and "borrowing it indefinitely", she was focused and serious. She said she knew Hazall was in town for; "now that the deal is about to close, he can't miss this for the world." Apparently, Hazall's headquarters here on Amoi is of course within the Federation building, but that is like a fortress and my worry was that "you can't just prance in there looking all cute... even if you are, that won't do any good. There must be hundreds of guards in there."

Agatha smiled at me and placed her hand on mine saying she would take my remark as a compliment. By all means, I understand that she managed to stir the blood in Raoul, for she certainly has warmth I wouldn't mind coming closer to.

The plan is as follows: The day prior to our break in Carr will send some officers on a fake mission saying they received a call regarding unwanted persons on the premises, which will give them the chance to scan the area and measure up the security we need to pass. The following day Agatha and me will dress up as solicitors and head off to Hazall's office with an urgent message regarding the takeover of the biomedical center; more specifically transactions of the money from the stock market to his account. Since we are dealing with large numbers the authentication has to be done by a bank representative (Agatha), an authorized witness (me) and two agents (the officers from the previous day, working under cover). Agatha will sweet talk the old man with her charm and my job will be to hook you up to Hazall's computer, which will be done through 'code-swapping'. We will use you, my dear Artemisia, and you won't even have to work hard. You see, to be able to do your banking over the network, you must have a small program from the bank itself that authenticates your computer by recognizing the identity of the program, which is unique to all users. But when it comes to large sums of money, the bank has made sure to pamper their clients by arranging personal transfers in the presence of their account managers and solicitors, in order for the already pampered wealthy to not have to go to the bank. So troublesome you know. Very nice; Raoul has that service too. Anyway, for that you need to connect the bank host (you) to authenticate the user and then the further go to the main server of the bank. Of course, you cannot connect to the bank, but Hazall doesn't know that and I'll create a temporary website that will look like that of the bank.

The money will already be in his account (taken from the poor tax-payers this time although for a good cause), just in case he decides to call the bank and make sure the transfer is completed. What you will do instead is that whilst Agatha is chitchatting and flirting, you will be scanning through his hard drive for security codes. Now there will be loads of security codes to go through, but you will steal the keychain that keeps track of every single one he has on his computer. You will also be uploading (the same time baby) a hidden wormhole, so that we can break into his little stationary without him even noticing it. Ha! It was how I managed to break into Iason's computer the very first time. Yes, here I am. Revealing my secrets and the only way Iason found out about it is because I was silly enough not to lock the door. You see, when you have refined skills in something you can become overconfident and careless – well, he taught me my lesson and I've been careful since. So when hooked up to you baby, you'll have to suck the information out of that stationary and steal the keychain.

So… what else can I tell you, Artemisia? Will you be jealous if I tell you I have another girl in my bed? I understand Raoul even more now. Agatha told me so many things about him I didn't know, but also about things I recognized and in between all the planning we were laughing on Raoul's behalf. A bit nasty perhaps but it was so funny being able to say things like "Oh, and when he does that thing with his mouth…", "I agree, and the way he nags…", "… and his habits with always folding the napkin before he wipes his mouth…, "…never scratches his groin…", "cute when flossing…".

Well, who knew a whole conversation could spring from the very concept of dental floss. Agatha told me what it was like to live in Raoul's condo – together with him for several months and the everyday habits they shared. She said;

"You know he takes a new string for every crevice between his teeth. When he is finished there is this huge pile of floss in the sink. Oh by the Gods!" She almost flew up from her seat. "And you know what? He does SHAVE!"

"That dirty little liar!" I exclaimed and explained to her I had confronted him once about those things and he said it was not his.

"Well, we did share." Agatha smiled in defense.

"Even the razor?" I asked skeptically and she nodded saying; "Oh yeah, he wasn't stuck up about that."

I remembered our little session in the bathtub while back and told her about it and Agatha responded by opening up.

"Yes, I remember the first time he did that to me. He was in the bathroom, shaving – not that he has anything to shave, but still I think he enjoys to feel that he is able to do things that others take for granted… anyway, we were preparing to go out. It was my birthday and he promised to take me to the theatres to see a romantic play. When he was finished shaving I asked if I could borrow his razor and started attending myself. He had never seen it before and sat at the edge of the tub watching… almost mesmerized. I usually waxed, but at that time I was being comfortable and didn't bother going to the salon. He watched the long strokes along my legs and once I was finished with one leg he wanted to do the other. And so he joined me in the tub… It was the first time he joined me."

"But not the first time you had sex." I muttered a little jealously.

Agatha started laughing and threw herself in my arms and sat down on my lap. She is so petite in size. I forgot how good it was to hold a girl.

"No, you are right, but you don't have to be jealous."

I was trying to defend myself denying the obvious, but she hushed me with a kiss saying; "He loves you, Katze. Gosh, you should hear what he says about you. I am the one who should be jealous. But I'm not, for he is happy."

This lovely little thing then gazed seriously into my eyes, with a faint smile on her lips and added; "You take good care of him, Kat. He is unusual for a Blondie."

I knew what she meant, and so I had to reveal my secret to her. It hit her like lightning and I saw her turning to stone in my arms, mourning me through Raoul's eyes. I told her about my disease and that my days were numbered and also my reasons for declining treatment. I think she understood, but she brought forth what seeded guilt in me.

"You will break his heart, Katze."

I couldn't say anything. In that sense, Agatha knew Raoul better than me. She had lived with him longer than I had and come closer to him than any other; even Iason. She continued and I listened.

"You know, when Iason Mink died, Raoul was barely holding on to his sanity with grief. It was a new sensation and Blondies are not meant to feel those things. But they do. It is just that they are so overly protected by Jupiter in their little Kingdom in Eos that they never come across these things. Believe me even my Master, Lord Qhui, was a good man deep inside. But we Pets are taught to be quiet and to have no will, whereas Blondies are taught to force their will upon everyone. Two impossible worlds and the wall between us are upheld by our lessons. But Blondies need to be spoken to in order for them to open their eyes… and they see. They do feel, pussycat. You cannot gain respect by being a compliant little slave all the time, or by being a mindless robotic thing without a will. Of course you will reduce yourself to something that resembles furniture rather than a person and you will be treated like such."

"Hey, I was furniture and when I disobeyed Iason he marked me for life." I showed her my scar, but Agatha had the upper hand.

"And then he made you into one of the biggest names in the underworld, making you very rich and allowing for you to become his right hand, Kat. Justice serves those who serve themselves. Don't you think Iason saw that in you? I mean, open your eyes, pussycat. Don't you see that pattern? Who were remaining closest to Iason Mink in his life?"

I started thinking about what Agatha said and names were flowing out of me.

"'Kay, who was always a nuisance, Raoul, who quite often annoyed Iason with his 'flat refusals', Riki, who was posing the most resistance to his heart, and me… and I guess I wasn't an angel either."

Suddenly, it was clear. Iason was observant. He did see, he could feel and he understood. He had indeed been the greatest leader of them all, and suddenly I understood why Jupiter wanted him so desperately back on the throne, not matter the cost. Even if the cost was to accept Riki and the likes of him and even change the course of life for many. Iason was the ultimate leader and Jupiter had realized that. At that moment, Jupiter seemed ever less frightening and I opened parts of my mind that had been shut down by prejudice. I saw life from a greater perspective and my determination to put Iason back on the throne set me free. I found myself smiling, and Agatha asked what it was in her comments that I found so funny.

"Nothing." I said. "You just gave me peace."

Agatha and I have never met before in private yet we had so much in common to talk about. It even led us down a road we never imagined. Well, now don't be jealous baby, but she spent the night here and more specifically in my bed. Goodness, I can't even remember what it was like to be with a woman, but she made a very pleasant effort to reawaken those memories. Raoul and I have now one more thing in common… and what a wonderful thing it is too. And she was right. Despite her lacking what a man has, she was able to make me whine and groan under her body. Now I know where Raoul learned his tongue technique and the tenderness he showed me a few nights ago. As for me, I relished the taste and scent of a woman and I realized I could love both; Agatha and Raoul.

I had to dive into my distant memories about a woman's body, as my lips merged with those swollen feminine attributes that felt like a deliciously wet mouth kissing me back. My tongue immediately searched for that sensitive little spot I knew I had tasted long back and my fingers lisped inside her as if they found a home. I was insatiable to the freshness of her scent and the sensations I experienced with hands and mouth. I wanted more and my body grew sensitive to the point where I climaxed to feeling of her rhythmically contracting around my fingers. It was an incredible feeling for someone like me. I don't even know how to begin to describe it.

I am confident she will pull him out of his mourning and I can't imagine a better person to be at his side in the future. She is more than any man I've met before, and all this power is enveloped in a body that can be tender in a tough world. It's a skill I'd like to learn, but it was too late for me. My disease has progressed too far and a few hours ago she held me tight as cramps were pushing the blood out of my lungs. Agatha comforted me and stroked my hair as my body clamed down. I don't know why, Artemisia, but I am not scared anymore. How she managed to take that away from me, I'll never know.