Title: Inside My Mind

Pairing: TMR/FemHP, DM/CW, DM/LL, HG/BZ, SB/OC, RL/NT

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or the quotes. I also kind of took the quote idea from another story. I don't own the language, Druhir. I also don't own the Ancient Language from Eragon nor do I own the language of Quenya from Lord of the Rings. I just need them for my story to work and I don't fancy making up a language. I'm dedicated but not that dedicated.

Most of this language will not be mine and will be taken from various sources. The list goes on and on so I will not list them but as previously stated and now reiterated, the Elvish language is not mine. See…that rhymed.

Note: I'm trying to stick to my one chapter a day rule that I promised my friend. That didn't work yesterday because my wi-fi went down. It wouldn't have worked anyway since I finished the last chapter at 12 this morning. I keep looking at the number of reviews I have and I know that I'll reach 1000 by the time I'm finished. Well, I'm hoping at least.

And the prefect issue…my friend reminded me about that. It'll be resolved in the first part of this chapter.

The cooking classes are based off truth. My best friend, a guy, tried to teach me how to cook. It didn't work out very well…I was permanently kicked out of my kitchen.

We also get to find out why Bella despises the idea of being weak.

Inside My Mind

By: Sistersgrimmlover

Chapter XLVIII

Number 12, Grimmauld Place, London, England, Great Britain

Sunday the 1st of August 1995

11:20 AM

"We won't be coming back here before you two go off to Hogwarts. So make sure you have all your stuff," Maya had insisted.

Sirius had still been packing as well but Maya felt that since he was an adult that he'd get it done, quickly.

She was wrong.

It was now eleven twenty and they were twenty minutes late because Sirius couldn't find his favorite leather pants. Maya leaned against the door, her trunk sitting by her side. She was rather annoyed with Sirius at this point since it was leather pants and he had at least five identical pairs but this was Sirius. He would throw a tantrum if he didn't get what he wanted.

"Is he still looking for those leather pants?" Bella sighed as she pulled her trunk down the stairs. Hermione nodded, absently. She was reading through the Potions book once more. She wanted to be prepared for anything Snape tried to do in the upcoming year.

"Yeah. When is he going to remember that he can just ask Kreacher to find them while we're at the Riddle Manor?" asked Hermione. Bella's lips twitched and she muffled her snort.

"Uncle Sirius is a little slow, isn't he?"

"In more than one way. Slow in the head and slow in moving. Get a move on, Sirius! We don't have all day!" Maya called.

In answer to that, there was a loud thumping noise and suddenly Sirius was tumbling down the stairs with his trunk in one hand and a pair of leather pants in his other hand.

"I'm here! I'm here!" Sirius gasped. Bella snorted and Sirius gave her a scathing glare. He flipped open his trunk and dumped the pants inside before closing it and locking it once more. He waved them forward and the group made their way to the dining room, where a fireplace was.

Sirius quickly lit it and Bella and him bowed mockingly to Hermione. Hermione blinked in confusion.

"After you, Princess Prefect."

Maya rolled her eyes at their childish behavior. Hermione scowled and crossed her arms, obviously upset over their teasing. Hermione had gotten her letter the day before when Bella was gone on her date, proclaiming her prefect.

"Shut up. Nothing's wrong with being a prefect," Hermione snapped. Bella snorted.

"Right. You're officially a stick in the mud. No more having fun or dueling. You'll be patrolling hallways and taking house points. Who in their right mind would make you a prefect? You're crazy!" Bella laughed. Hermione glared and took a pinch of Floo powder and walked into the flames.

"Riddle Manor."

"Why is the Bush angry? Can bushes get angry?" Sasha hissed from around Bella's neck. Bella's eyes were wide and she laughed, quietly.

"That's not a Bush. That's my sister."

"Why is you sister a bush?" Sasha asked, rather annoyed.

Bella's laughed again and shook her head. It wasn't worth explaining.


The Riddle Manor, Little Hangleton, England, Great Britain

Sunday the 1st of August 1995

11:30 PM

Gideon watched as the fire in the drawing room turned bright green and Ron and Ginny hurried over. They were watching, carefully, waiting for the first person to step out. Hermione came through first, looking very cross.

"What's got you in a knot?" Ginny asked, carefully. Hermione sneered and shook her head. Gideon supposed that she had adopted that look from the Slytherins that the two girls hung out with all the time.

Maya came out of the fire next and she hurried over to Hermione, dragging her trunk along. Maya was glaring at the fire and wrapped her arm around Hermione's shoulder.

"Nothing's wrong with being a prefect, Mione. They're only teasing you," Maya reassured her. Ron grinned in excitement as well.

"I'm a prefect too!" he cried out. Hermione looked at him with surprise coloring her face. She inspected him.

"You're a prefect too! Congrats, Ron," Hermione said, rather morosely. Gideon watched as she spun brown hair around one finger. Not that it needed the curl. Hermione's hair was loose so it was incredibly bushy and it looked like a mass of brown curls had decided to just sit on her head.

Sirius came through the fire next, laughing. He settled on a seat and looked at the three redheads.

"Hey, you three. How goes it?" Sirius asked, grinning. Gideon shrugged and Ron grinned, proudly.

"I'm a prefect," he announced, glancing at Hermione. Sirius raised an eyebrow at the look that crossed Ron's face when he looked at Hermione.

"I see. So both of you are goody two-shoes now. Ha," Sirius smirked. Ron rolled his eyes. Gideon and Ginny were looking towards the green fire. Bella was standing in the fireplace, motionless.

Gideon blinked at how strange it looked. She suddenly looked very different in that one moment.

Her face was expressionless in that one moment and her lips were slightly parted. The green of her eyes were even brighter than normal. The brightness of her eyes made her skin seemed paler, almost translucent. The green flames licked her skin and she didn't flinch.

Her eyes seemed far away and she slowly tilted her head. Hermione looked up from the floor and turned to stare at Bella in the fire as well. Soon, all eyes were on Bella. Bella blinked before coming through the fire. A smile spread on her lips.

"Hi, you three!" Bella said, happily. Gideon frowned at her sudden change. Bella ran a hand through her hair and Gideon was suddenly fixed on amazing she looked.

She looks hot was the only consistent thought in Gideon's head.

She wore a black dress shirt that looked a million times too big for her. The sleeves were rolled up past her elbows. It fell to her lower thigh and she wore tight jeans. Her combat boots were unlaced and her locket was swinging on the outside of her shirt. Her hair still couldn't choose between waves and curls but Gideon though it was better that way.

"Hey, Bella," Ginny smiled. Bella dropped onto the floor, leaning against the chair that Maya was sitting in. Maya was curled up in the chair, looking through Witch Weekly, carefully.

"Anything?" Bella asked, with a hint of a smile on her lips. Maya grumbled and shook her head.

"No. Stupid rainbow chicks. I wanted a picture," Maya whined. Bella rolled her eyes and flipped her hair. She suddenly mesmerized Gideon again. He hadn't been able to draw up the courage to ask her to Hogsmeade but he had promised himself that he would.

"No you don't. I looked exactly how I look now. Minus the dress. I'm wearing jeans with the shirt. But seriously…I think my new favorite food is chicken stir-fry," Bella smirked. Maya rolled her eyes.

"Why chicken stir-fry?" Ron asked, curiously. Bella's lips spread into a mischievous smile.

"It had sake in it."

"I swear you're turning into an alcoholic," Sirius grumbled. Bella gave her godfather a sharp look.

"I didn't come home drunk, did I?"

"No…" Sirius admitted. Bella gave him a bright smile then and turned to a pouting Ron. His arms were crossed.

"What's wrong with you?" Hermione asked. Ron sighed.

"I wish my parents were as cool as yours, Bella. Mum wouldn't even let me have a sip of butterbeer until I turned thirteen. You're already drinking Firewhiskey and stuff!" Ron said, annoyed. Bella laughed.

"They know I'm responsible enough not to get drunk. Though I did get a little drunk the first time I drank. I had two bottles of aged Firewhiskey so that was my fault. Anyway, it's not like had much. I had a glass of wine. Apparently, very good wine," Bella said. Ginny frowned.

"Where did you get wine?" she asked in confusion. Bella didn't even stiffen though Sirius and Maya did. Hermione had enough confidence in her sister for her to lie fluently.

"I went out to dinner last night with Draco. He was treating me. Vintage wine. 1945, I think it was," Bella said, lying about the first part. Sirius and Maya exchanged looks at the mention of the year of the wine.

"Rooms. When are we getting our room assignments?" Hermione finally asked.

"Now, if you wish."

Gideon didn't think he'd ever seen someone move as fast as Bella did. Gideon was surprised that she didn't give herself whiplash. Her hair swung over her shoulder and her lips curled into a smirk when Riddle awarded her a raised eyebrow.

"Aimez-vous mon maillot?" Bella asked with a slight smirk. Gideon frowned. It was getting increasingly annoying that Bella could speak languages that he didn't understand. Maya seemed to understand it well enough as did Sirius. Hermione wasn't even really listening. She was now writing on a piece of parchment, most likely sending a letter.

"J'ai acheté le maillot. Bien sûr, j'aime ça," Riddle said, in rapid French. Ginny looked quite fascinated with him. Gideon thoroughly disapproved of his sister's preoccupation with the DADA teacher but she never paid him any attention when he warned her against him.

"How does it look on me?" Bella hissed. Gideon suppressed his shudder. The fact that Bella could speak Parseltongue freaked Gideon out a bit but at the same time it was actually kind of cool.

"Extremely sexy."

"You broke rule four."

Gideon blinked at the words Sirius had said. He frowned, wondering if rule four was a code for the Order. Ginny blinked owlishly and turned to her twin brother.

"What's rule four? Is that an Order code?" Ginny asked, quietly. Gideon shrugged.

"That's what I was thinking."

Hermione giggled and the two Weasley twins looked at her.

"It's not an Order code that I know. That's another thing entirely, I think. Though, it might be a mission for the Order that I'm not aware of though," Hermione said, truthfully. Gideon looked at Bella who was looking rather confused at the moment. Maya leaned and whispered something in Bella's ear.

Bella's cheeks rapidly turned red before she paled considerably. She jumped up and glared at Sirius.

"Uncle Sirius! You utter moron! I thought we had an understanding. I trust you, you trust me. I thought that was how it worked. You don't trust me?" Bella shouted. Sirius looked abashed though his stare never faltered. Riddle's arms were crossed and he looked annoyed.

"And for good reason," he muttered. Bella glared at him.

"You. Shut up."

"I think this conversation should be carried in a more private place," Maya said, pointedly. She was looking at the three curious Weasley siblings. Bella flushed and grabbed her trunk and then Hermione's wrist. Hermione only had time to grab her trunk before she was being dragged out of the room.

"No. I don't think I want to talk at all with him," Bella said as she walked out of the room. Riddle looked to the heavens as if it were the gods' fault that Bella was angry and he followed them. He stopped in the doorway.

"I swear, if she tries to destroy my house, you will pay for it."

He spun on his heel and walked out, following Bella.

Gideon wondered what that was about…


Riddle Manor, Little Hangleton, England, Great Britain

Sunday the 1st of August 1995

11:50 PM

"And this is your room. The library is down the hall. Hermione's bedroom is right next to the library. Remember that. The bathroom's through that door," Tom said, softly. Bella was frowning in thought as she stepped into the luxurious room. She placed her trunk to the side and looked around.

It was a lot lighter than the other parts of the manor. The drawing room had looked decidedly classic. This looked a lot more modern, resembling Tom's apartment in Barcelona in some way.

"It's pretty," Bella murmured.

To the left was a double bed. It was a platform bed of some sort with a short headboard, the color of clean sand. On top was a white mattress with white sheets, black pillows, and an apple green blanket folded at the bottom of it. The carpet was the color of snow and an apple green rug was by the large window.

On either side of the bed was a nightstand, the same color as the actual bed. On one nightstand were books that Bella would surely find interesting when the time came. On the other side was a lamp. Next to the lamp was a white chair with a matching ottoman.

All in all, it was a beautiful room.

"Hmm…one of my house elves designed it. Just for you," Tom murmured. Bella smiled at him, though her eyes had a strange glint. A glint that was becoming more familiar to Tom each time.

"I believe I'll let you get settled," Tom said, quickly. Bella lifted an eyebrow and backed up and leaned against the door until it shut. Her fingers went towards the knob and she turned the lock.

Tom mentally cursed himself for putting Bella in a room with a lock.

Bella put one hand on her hip and her lips twisted into a smirk.

"Where do think you're going?" Bella asked, curiously. Tom cleared his throat.

"I have things to do. Move from the door, Ana."

"Why?" Bella asked as she walked towards Tom. Tom was distracted as the black cloth slipped from her shoulder, revealing two purple hickeys, a dark green strap, and a white strap.

Suddenly, Bella was pressed against Tom and her hands were against his chest. She pushed him back, her annoyance boosting her strength. Tom wasn't exactly trying to stop either. Bella crawled onto the bed after him, her hair over one shoulder.

She straddled him and he gave her an unimpressed look. Bella leaned down and brushed her lips against his. She pulled back and gave him an unfathomable look before she leaned down and kissed him once more. Tom kissed her back this time, but more aggressively.

He leaned up on his elbows before pushing himself up into a sitting position, never breaking away from Bella. Bella pushed him down again, her eyes half closed, and began unbuttoning his shirt. Tom's kiss got more aggressive as he buttoned his shirt. Bella growled and Tom suddenly flipped her. She gasped when his mouth moved from her lips and down her neck, rapidly. He was quickly unbuttoning her shirt, revealing a white tank top.

"Damn you," he growled against her collarbone. Bella gave a breathy laugh and made to unbutton his shirt.

"No, no, no. My turn. You had your fun yesterday," he murmured. Bella glared at him and she looked ready to either rape him or murder him.

"You're a bastard."

"So I've heard."

Tom's lips brushed against her collarbone. Bella hissed as he bit down, harshly. Tom's eyes drifted up to look at her and she smirked at him. His tongue brushed across the hollow of Bella's throat. Bella's lips found his again and just when her fingers brushed across the waistband of Tom's jeans, he pulled away. He sat cross-legged at the foot of her bed and staring at her with wild eyes and a blank face, almost as if nothing had happened.

"Why the hell did you stop?" demanded Bella. Tom tilted his head.

"You make me lose control. And you don't want to do this. I know you don't," Tom said, softly. Bella glared at him and crossed her arms.

"How the hell do you know?" she demanded, defensively. Tom could see how insecure she was about sex. Tom sighed.

"I can see it, Ana. You don't want to have sex."

"Yeah I do," Bella said, flatly. Tom shook his head, annoyed with himself for being a good person.

Whenever Bella was around, his what-I-want-I-get attitude went flying out of the window. And for sure, he wanted sex but…she was upset. He damned himself again for being a good person.

"No. You don't. You want to have sex because you think I want to have sex. I was joking."

"You don't want me?" Bella asked, frantically. Tom looked to the ceiling and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Salazar, give me strength. That's not it, Bella. I'd appreciate if you slept with me when you want to and not when you're angry with your godfather. That's just a mood-killer, right there," Tom said, flatly.

A giggle escaped Bella and Tom rolled his eyes.

"Are you sure? That you're not going to easily get tired of me because I'm holding out on you?" Bella asked, curiously. Tom shook his head.

"I hate women who are clingy and daft. If they can't hold their own, then they aren't worth my time. If they're blonde, they aren't worth my time. You aren't clingy or daft and I'm sure that you can hold your own in a duel. You don't need a protector," Tom said, softly. Bella glared at him though something flashed in her eyes.

"Damn straight."

"Then, no, I won't easily get tired of you."


The Riddle Manor, Little Hangleton, England, Great Britain

Thursday the 13th of August 1995

9:00 AM

"We're making what?" Bella asked, frowning. Tom sighed and shook his head.

"Wheat flour chocolate chip cookies. You picked it. I didn't want to make cookies. I'm not a Suzy Homemaker. I don't bake," Tom said, bored. Bella glared at him and crossed her arms.

"Is it because you're not a girl? There are plenty of men out there that bake. Only real men bake, you wanker," Bella snapped. Tom rolled his eyes and pointed to the cookbook that Bella had found in the Muggle section of Tom's 'Light' library.

"Preheat the oven to 375º," Tom read. Bella frowned and crossed her arms.

"But wouldn't it cook faster if it were higher?"

"No."

"But, that makes sense."

"No it doesn't. I have something to do. Just follow the instructions. It isn't that hard," Tom sighed. Bella looked down at it like it were rocket science.

"Er…sure."

"I'll be back," Tom warned. Bella smirked at him.

"I look forward to it."

Bella watched Tom leave and she looked at the oven. She crossed her arms and leaned down too look at the dials on the oven. She shook her head and turned the dial up to 375º.

"I still think it'll cook faster my way."


The Riddle Manor, Little Hangleton, England, Great Britain

Thursday the 13th of August 1995

9:30 AM

"What the hell?"

Bella groaned. She was looking down at the baking sheet with an annoyed look gracing her pretty face. Flour was smeared all over her right cheek and her hair looked streaked with white. She was holding a black cookie in her hand and staring at it with frustration on her face.

"I can't bite it!" Bella cried out. She threw the cookies at the wall and it fell to the ground unbroken. Tom bent down to pick it up and he attempted to break it in half. With a lot of exertion, the cookie broke in half.

It was just as black on the inside as it was on the outside.

"You burnt it. How did you burn it? It was cookies! That should be impossible to mess up," Tom groaned. Bella glared at him.

"I don't know! I followed every instruction! I did everything right! It put in the butter, the brown sugar, the white sugar, the baking soda, the vanilla, the damned eggs, the flour, and the fucking chocolate! I put it in for fifteen minutes! But it's black," Bella cried out. Tom shook his head.

Bella took the baking sheet and the rock hard 'cookies' and threw it in the garbage. She took the cookie batter and a spoon and began to eat it out of the bowl. Tom took a spoon and tasted the batter himself.

"At least the batter wasn't half bad…" Tom sighed, weakly. Bella glared at him and tossed the bowl in the sink along with the spoon. She stormed from the room, leaving Tom staring after her.

"Incredibly melodramatic, that one."


The Riddle Manor, Little Hangleton, England, Great Britain

Friday the 28th of August 1995

2:00 PM

"A piano?" Bella whispered.

Tom nodded and crossed his arms as he stared at it.

"It was here when I inherited the house. I didn't feel like moving it. It's incredibly old and one day it'll be worth something," Tom pointed out.

The pair were in the ballroom. Riddle Manor was big enough to have a medium-sized ballroom that was absolutely beautiful. The black grand piano had the top up and it was dusty. It looked like the room hadn't been entered in many, many years. Bella wondered, briefly, what had happened to Tom's father.

"Oh…let's leave," Bella said, shortly. She turned away from the piano. She stopped when Tom's hand landed on her shoulder. She looked to the ceiling, begging for someone to come so he wouldn't ask the inevitable question.

"What happened?"

And there it was. And Bella knew she wouldn't be unable to answer him because when it came to Tom, she trusted him irrevocably. She trusted him more than she should.

"I was ten."

The three words made Tom pull Bella towards the piano and she sat down at the bench. She looked at the dusty keys and felt an instant revulsion at the sight of them.

"What happened when you were ten?"

"Well, when I was seven years old, Uncle Sirius told me that my mother, Lily, had played the piano. I wanted to learn too. I always felt closer to my mother than with my father. My mother was given a choice but she didn't choose the way out. She protected me. So, Uncle Sirius gave me lessons for my birthday," Bella said, softly. Tom nodded and looked at her, patiently, through half-closed eyes. Bella cleared her throat and continued on.

"My piano teacher was an old woman. She was nice, Mrs. Jones. She had a son about fifteen years older than me. Mrs. Jones died when I was nine years old. I was devastated. The son started to teach me…" Bella said, softly. Tom frowned.

He hoped this wasn't going where he could picture it going…

"He had a really short temper. If I messed up, he screamed at me. He screamed a lot. And one day, he got so fed that he slapped me. I had a bruise on my cheek. He apologized and started to say how I was the best piano student and he'd teach me a piece that Mrs. Jones had never let me play if I kept quiet. It was always my favorite piece of music to listen to. Mrs. Jones never let me play it because she said it required pain. Emotional, physical pain," Bella trailed off.

Tom was slightly relieved that Bella hadn't been sexually abused. It probably would have explained her slight aversion to sex. Now, Tom knew that it was a deep, deep insecurity about herself.

"And, he taught me the song. I never got it quite right. Never. Oh, I tried, but it always sounded robotic...stilted. He got angry at me for that and told me I was damning his mother's memory by playing the song wrong. I was punched for that. He knocked out a tooth and broke my nose. Kreacher healed me before Uncle Sirius got home but…I hated him so much in that one moment. I hated the piano. I hated that I was so fucking weak. So, I quit and asked Uncle Sirius to get rid of the piano. He moved it to one of the Black estates where we never go. In Russia."

Tom stared at her. She turned to face the piano and she brushed her hand across the ivory keys.

"I hate being called weak. That's why I don't let anyone mess with me. Because I'll kick their asses before they can," Bella sighed. Tom crossed his arms and pointed at the piano.

"Play that piece."

"What?" Bella asked in complete surprise. Her eyes were wide and she looked rather confused at his command.

"I refuse to be in a relationship with a woman who is afraid of a piano. You've been through enough pain, emotional and physical, for you to play this song right. Now, play," Tom stated, matter-of-factly. Bella glared at him.

"I am not afraid of a piano."

"Then prove it," Tom said, gesturing to the piano.

Bella turned to the piano and took a deep breath. She frowned, trying to remember the sheet music as if it were right in front of her. She couldn't quite remember everything…

And suddenly, her fingers were dancing across the ivory keys. She was going slowly at first but her fingers seemed to remember the way she was supposed to play. Her fingers paused at all the proper places. Bella's fingers were creating something beautiful that she didn't even notice. She slammed her hands down on the deep notes, her fingers dancing as if she didn't have a care in the world. Her head was bent over the piano in deep concentration.

She put the passion, the hurt, the pain, the fear, and the rage that she felt into the song. It didn't sound as full as it could but even Tom could see the emotion she was putting in the song. Teardrops fell onto the keys and she brushed them off, without her fingers stopping.

Bella didn't even notice the crowd she was gathering. Tom turned and saw Maya and Hermione in the doorway. The entire Weasley clan, exempting the patriarch, was crowded inside the ballroom. A few Order members were watching as well.

Bella's finger glided across the keys, the song so simplistic when watching her play yet so complex in sound.

Bella glanced up slowly at Tom through dark green eyes. She sucked in a breath as her left hand glided back and forth as her right hand slammed down on the contrasting chords.

Tom watched Bella with dark eyes that could read her soul. He didn't pity her, since he knew that she didn't want it. He wasn't sympathizing with her either.

He was just there. And that was enough for Bella.

She turned her head to the piano and slammed down on the chords. The people around her could see her shoulders shaking with unspoken and unheard sobs. She finally played the last note, softly, ending the beautiful song.

She dropped her hands from the piano and bit her lip.

There was a quiet clap from behind her. She spun around and almost fell off the piano bench. Bella blinked at the people that had been silently observing her.

Moody and Kingsley had the most solemn expressions. They seemed to have understand her rage and emotion through the song. Ginny, Maya, and Mrs. Weasley seemed to have tearing during the performance. Gideon and Ron were giving her sad looks, as if they didn't quite understand but they understand enough.

Only Hermione was smiling.

"That wasn't meant to be heard by anyone."

The 'but him' was left out but it was clearly heard by anyone.

"Sorry about that," Moody said, gruffly.

Bella cleared her throat and stood from the piano bench and cast it a look that showed that she was repulsed but drawn to the piano. Maya briefly wondered what had caused such a reaction.

"I didn't know you could play the piano," Ginny said, faintly. Bella gave a dry and sardonic smile. Ginny looked hurt at the mocking look she was giving the girl and Bella's face softened.

"I don't. I don't play the piano."

"But you just were…" Ron trailed off. Bella had turned on him and her eyes flashed in warning. She took a few steps forward until she was staring up at him through her fringes.

"I don't! I don't play the piano! I just said that! Honestly, Ron!" Bella screamed. Ron flinched and glared at her.

"There's no need to yell," Ron snapped. Bella glared right back at him.

"There obviously was. You didn't hear me the first time. And what are you smiling about?" Bella demanded of Hermione. Hermione leaned forward and brushed Bella's hair from her eyes and her smile grew brighter at the sight of Bella's eyes.

"You needed that, didn't you? You were always so bitter…so angry…impulsive…selfish."

"I had every right to be angry and bitter!" Bella snarled. Hermione pulled her sister into a hug and the others looked at them confused. Tom stared from his seat with a blank face as Bella cried silently into her taller sister's shoulder.

"You did. You have every right. Every. Right."


The Riddle Manor, Little Hangleton, England, Great Britain

Friday the 28th of July 1995

7:30 PM

"Where was Bella at dinner?" asked Sirius, curiously. Maya and Sirius were the only ones in the sitting room at the moment and they were both patiently waiting for Dumbledore to arrive so they could get on with the Order meeting. Maya had avoided speaking about Bella until that point but now she couldn't keep her questions contained.

"Why didn't you tell me that Bella could play the piano?" Maya asked. Sirius looked completely surprised by the question and he scratched his head, absently as he pulled Maya even closer to him. That put her on his lap.

"She told you that? I'm surprised. She hates the sound of a piano. I took her to a show right after she turned ten. An orchestra was playing and the pianist had a solo. She left in the middle of it and refused to come back in," Sirius said, sadly. Maya decided to play dumb. She wanted the whole story.

Or at least the part of the story that Sirius knew.

"What do you mean? Why does she hate pianos?" Maya asked, carefully. It didn't look like she hated the piano. It looked she feared it for strange and twisted reason that Maya just couldn't understand.

"Well, she was seven and I told her that Lily played the piano. She was so excited and she wanted to learn. So, for her birthday I got her piano lessons. She took them for three years. She was so good. Her playing was always beautiful. And then around the time she turned ten, her first piano teacher had passed and her son was teaching Bella. That was around the time Bella got clumsy. Bella began to play the saddest piece. It always sounded…incomplete and I suppose that was a good thing," Sirius said, softly. Maya frowned.

"Why?" she asked, confused. She was never too good with recognizing emotion within music, though Bella's emotions had been pretty clear. She wasn't a very artistic person and she liked to base everything on pure fact. It was why it had been so difficult to accept the fact that Hermione was a witch.

"It hurt me to think that she'd be able to play that song to perfection. Then one day…Bella changed. She was a happy little kid. She always smiled. Except for when she complained about the Muggle kids at her primary school. She said they were annoying and she'd made a few kids cry but that was because she was a bit of a tomboy. But…that day…Bella stormed up to me the moment I came back from school and screamed. She demanded that I get rid of the piano and I asked her why. She said she was sick of it. That she hated it. That she wanted it gone. She said that she wanted to quit. So, I let her."

Maya frowned at this and cleared her throat.

"She plays beautifully."

Sirius froze and looked at Maya in wonder. Maya tucked her neck in the curve of Sirius' neck and his arms tightened around her.

"What do you mean by that?" Sirius asked, slowly. Maya cleared her throat.

"I…Hermione and I…we were in the library, reading of course. And we heard this beautiful music. It was the most heartbreaking thing I'd ever heard. And so we went there and the Weasleys met us at the door. Kingsley and Moody joined us a little after. It was this old ballroom, I think. Tom and Bella were sitting at this grand piano. It was black and old looking. Beautiful. Bella didn't even notice us. She was immersed in the music. And then she looked at Tom…and you could see the love. They don't know it and though Bella is still a little immature…she loves him in her own way. She may not know what real love is but they have these deep, deep…raw emotions for each other," Maya said, softly. Sirius stiffened at the mention of those emotions but Maya almost didn't seem to notice. She was thinking of other things.

"And then…she finished the song and it made me shiver. She was so good…and then she turned and saw us. She was shocked and she looked at the piano. She was repulsed by it. She was repulsed by the fact that she had even touched it even though you could see she wanted to again. And she told us that it wasn't meant to be heard by us. Only him. It's only ever him these days. Ginny said that she didn't know that Bella could play the piano. Bella said that didn't play the piano. She didn't say she couldn't. She said she didn't. Ron was being tactless then," Maya continued. She gave a little laugh, as she was deep in thought.

She was wondering what had made Bella quit something that was so damn good at. Bella was good at dueling, sure, but she wasn't good at making friends or being social. Playing the piano was something you could talk about with people. But, she didn't want people to know.

She was ashamed of something. Of herself…for some reason.

"Ron said that she just was. Bella yelled at him that she didn't and that he didn't listen. She asked why Hermione was smiling. Hermione was the only one smiling. Molly, Ginny, and I were crying. Moody and Kingsley looked serious. Gideon and Ron looked rather sad. Tom was only…he looked…regretful. I don't know about what but he looked ashamed for the slightest of moments. I think it might be because he knew we were there but maybe not…Hermione seemed to know what was wrong. Hermione told Bella that she was sad…bitter…angry…impulsive. Selfish. Bella screamed that she had a right to be those things. And Hermione agreed. She only hugged her and agreed."


The Riddle Manor, Little Hangleton, England, Great Britain

Friday the 28th of July 1995

8:00 PM

"We can begin now."

Dumbledore looked up as Tom swept into the room. Albus frowned at his colleague, wondering briefly if the man was ill. His face was paler than usual, the color of snow almost and he looked slightly annoyed. His hair was framing his face instead of its usual perfect ponytail. Tonks and Emmeline hummed in appreciation. That amused Albus more than a little.

"Ah…where is young Bella?" Albus asked, curiously. Lately, the girl was never gone for long from Hermione or Tom's side. To see them both without her company was more than a little disconcerting.

"She won't be coming today. She is…not in the right state to be here," Tom said, sharply. The other Order members looked amused. Snape was sneering, obviously annoyed.

"She shouldn't be an Order member in the first place. Potter should get her priorities in order first. Probably, complaining about acne of some sort," Snape sneered. Hermione glared at her professor and the arm with her tattoo twitched. Snape noticed and his large nostrils flared slightly.

"No. She is attempting to reconnect with her dead mother. For her sake and our own…she will not be coming today. The meeting would be a waste of time. She wouldn't be able to contribute anything. She hasn't spoken to us since two earlier today. She won't come out of her room," Hermione sighed. Snape froze at the mention of Lily Potter.

Tom cleared his throat and ran a hand through his hair in absolute frustration. Albus wondered what was troubling the boy, though he knew he wouldn't get any answers if he asked in front of everybody. Tom was exceedingly private.

"She came out, all right. And almost destroyed my piano."

"What? She almost what?" Remus asked in confusion. Tom sighed and crossed his arms.

"She was playing the piano in the ballroom earlier. She became upset and she locked herself inside of her room. She refused to come out. I was late because she decided to come out and attempted to destroy my piano. I was going to sell it. Now, she's sitting there…just sitting. And when I left…she started to play."

Albus frowned at the explanation. It sounded like Tom was leaving things out. It wasn't important to the greater good so it couldn't mean that much. Bella was a volatile weapon and he had to make sure that she felt that she was in control as much as possible. Or his plans would never work. And he needed them to work.

Little did Albus Dumbledore know…little did he know.

Bella Potter wasn't only a volatile weapon. She was a weapon of destruction.

His destruction.

:::

A/N: I know this is a little shorter than it normally is but oh well. This chapter was a filler and I needed to get to this little recurring theme: the piano. It will now constantly be a recurring theme, signifying pain and hurt. Tom has a lot of emotional baggage. He needs someone with about the same amount of baggage: Bella. I needed to bring it when Tom and Bella got together since I can also show that Bella trusts almost no one more than she trusts him. Telling Tom something like that has made Tom think about certain secrets that he's keeping from her.

It's making him have second thoughts. And he's tearing himself up inside. How would you feel if someone you cared deeply about just told you something that they had never told anyone? And you were holding an important aspect of yourself secret? I bet you'd hate yourself. Imagine how that would feel with a soul bond. You're obligated to ensure that person's happiness. And lying doesn't make anyone happy…

The song in this chapter is: To Zanarkand

Next Chapter: Hogwarts Express, High Expectations, and High Inquisitors