The baby girl lying in the simple pram Clara was pushing was complaining up at her with a pitiful frown and Clara knew she was hungry. With a sad sigh, she tugged at the Doctor's sleeve as they roamed along the shops and gestured towards a restroom and he stared curiously before asking brightly, "What?" Then he raised both hands, "Oh, why didn't you just say you had to go; I'll watch her. Possibly go into a shop, one across the way has tea sets – it's never too early to learn about proper tea sele…"
Shaking her head and smiling, she reached for the little girl and then plucked her travel bag up onto her shoulder to allow, "She's hungry; I'm going to head in give her a feed and a change."
Clara could see on his face, just before she turned, he was trying to figure out what he should do in the interim, she imagined he'd still head into the tea shop and ask for samples to determine the best brew, and she was distracted by that amusing thought as she made her way into the room. Ella had perked up and was babbling in her ear, fists tugging handfuls of Clara's hair as she quickly spotted the changing table and then headed towards a set of couches, dropping Ella's bag down into the unoccupied one while trying not to look to the woman with the baby at her breast.
Sitting, she smiled down at the baby grinning up at her as she carefully removed one of the bottles she'd pre-filled with water. Clara plucked up a tube of pre-measured mix of formula and cereal powder and she turned Ella to settle her into her chest as she twisted off the bottle top to pour it in before closing and shaking it up, laughing as Ella gave a cheerful squeal of appreciation.
She was content to giggle along, until the woman on the second couch mirrored her giggle before offering honestly, "She's a beautiful little girl."
Heart frozen as she held the bottle to Ella's mouth, feeling the girl beginning to drink, Clara raised her gaze slowly and met the brown eyes across from her with a small smirk of surprise and an instant wetting of her eyes as she nodded and responded, "Thank you," before looking to the baby the other woman now lifted to her shoulder to begin burping, "She's… she's beautiful as well," Clara finished awkwardly, turning away at the amused thought she'd just complimented herself.
Because the baby the woman across from her held was herself.
And that woman was her mother.
"Sorry," Ellie gasped, "I didn't mean to intrude on…"
Clara raised her free hand and shook her head, "No, no, it's fine – you've done nothing," she began.
"You're crying," Ellie laughed curiously, gesturing.
"Sorry," Clara replied quickly, hand coming up to swipe at the tears on her cheeks before glancing down at Ella, because the girl was peering up at her and she smiled, dropping a kiss to her forehead to whisper, "Go on, sweetheart."
The other woman's eyes were on her and, Clara knew, she was trying to sum her up. She was trying to decipher why she'd been crying and Clara sighed before she looked up to see her eyes narrowed slightly, lips pushed together because she was chewing the inside of her cheek and she nodded to her, "It's a private room, if you need to get something off your chest," she lifted a hand towards her, "Like a confessional; though I'll admit, I'm not quite priest material."
Releasing a laugh that shocked both infants, Clara sank back into the couch with an embarrassed grimace and she shifted Ella against her, turning the bottle slightly to remind her to continue drinking, and she admitted, "Just, thinking about motherhood."
"Happens when you're a mum," Ellie told her on a small bob of her head to the left.
Clara smiled and looked to Ella, "Not quite a mum yet."
"Looks like you're doing just fine with your little girl," Ellie offered with an encouraging nod, "She adores you," she added on a laugh and Clara glanced down to find Ella smiling up at her, bubbles noisily zipping up through the milk.
With a sigh, Clara looked back to her mother and admitted, "Sort of adopted her; wasn't really planned, I mean, things could change any minute – her real mum could come looking for her and all this would be over." She smiled, "Just like that, could be over."
Her mother gave a low laugh and settled her hand at her own infant's back and told her honestly, "Adopted or not, you're her mum – not often these sorts of things are planned and things could change, any minute," she shifted baby Clara back in her hands, smiling down at her with a wonder Clara hadn't seen in such a long time before the woman sighed, "Blink of an eye, she could be gone."
Clara felt her own tears drop over her cheeks as she agreed breathlessly, "Yeah."
Then the other woman smiled up at her sadly, "But that's motherhood, isn't it – worrying about your children more than yourself." She nodded to the baby she held, "That's right, Clara, one day you'll see. Everything is for you and one day everything will be for your daughter," she smirked, "Or son," she lifted the baby to nuzzle her and Clara turned her eyes to Ella, plucking the empty bottle from her lips as she listened to her mother kiss at her cheeks to elicit a small giggle.
One Ella turned to instantly before calling, "Mumma," and turning back up to her.
Ellie laughed brightly as she looked to Clara, telling her calmly, "Don't you worry, motherhood seems to suite you just fine – your daughter's the best judge of that."
"She is," Clara replied shyly with a small smile as she shifted Ella onto her shoulder to pat at her back, watching her mother do the same with the baby she held; a baby who released a small bit of gas and then began to hiccup. "Do you ever worry you're not doing right by… her?"
Standing, Ellie shrugged and moved to a spot just in front of her, giving her a familiar grin before she admitted, "All the time – but do you wanna know a secret?"
Clara nodded slowly, looking up at her mother as Ella murmured in her ear.
"So long as you're doing for her, so long as you want to do right by her, you are doing right by her – what my mum always said," the woman offered on a laugh before reaching out to give Clara's shoulder a squeeze that made her turn away with a nod, a laugh, and a shaky smile. "We all worry," then she nodded her chin to Ella's smile and whispered, "You're doing just fine, miss, it's obvious she loves you very much."
Ellie straightened and Clara turned back to look up at her, watching her as she adjusted her baby, smiling at her as she continued to give a small jump with each hiccup. "You're a brilliant mum," Clara told her firmly, and when the women gave her a curious smile, she added, "I can tell," gesturing at her infant self, "She loves you very much as well."
They shared another small identical grin and then Ellie departed and Clara exhaled a long breath, feeling the small cool hands that touched at her cheeks before her head knocked Clara roughly and Ella mumbled, "Mumma," and then hummed happily.
Smothering her in kisses that made her squeal happily – the same as her mum had done with her – Clara stood and went to change her before emerging to find the Doctor standing next to the pram with an uncomfortable look on his face, eyes widening as he explained, "I've just had a conversation with your father about percolation and soiled nappies."
"Percolation and soiled nappies," Clara repeated, laying Ella down in the pram and touching her cheek gently before shifting back to nod and ask, "Find any good tea? Feel as though I might need a cup right about now."
His features softened and he reached for her elbow, gripping it gently to ask, "Is everything alright?"
Bowing her head, she told him, "More than alright," she glanced up with a nod and sniffled lightly, "My mum just got to see me being a mum." Clara laughed and looked away because she could feel the tears in her eyes as she added, "She approved."
The Doctor nudged her aside and took hold of the handle on the pram and smiled, lifting his arm slightly as she chuckled so she could loop hers through his. Clara sighed as they began to walk and she glanced back towards her parents, several shops away, and she caught her mother's eye, giving her an appreciative nod that the woman returned before Ellie glanced down into her own pram. The baby girl inside with the enormous dark eyes giggled up at her mischievously, showing off a deep dimple that made her stop a moment and look back to the woman walking with the gangly strange man at her side.
She watched them converse, the movements of that other woman's body and gestures of her free hand bringing an instant laugh to her throat she stopped with a lightly whispered, "Oh, my stars."
"Ellie, everything alright?" Dave asked her, shifting to narrow his eyes in the direction she was looking.
Body twisting back playfully to smile at him, she nodded, considering a rather insane thought – something Ellie Oswald was prone to doing – before telling him confidently, "Yeah, I think it will be."
