Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I'm just using the names she created for her wonderful story.
As always, a special thanks to X-NessieCullen-X for all that you do for me :)
Chapter 52
Waking Up to Ash and Dust
The music was loud and cigarette smoke made the entire room hazy. This was one of the few bars that still allowed smoking and he breathed it into his lungs. His hands were shaking when he sat down at the bar but he tried his best to act like he didn't want to murder someone in the back alley. It must have worked because a curvy redhead sitting a few stools down tried to make eye contact with him. He ignored her, pulled out his phone, and saw that Bella had message him back with a picture of a heart.
So caught up in his own head, he hadn't noticed Jasper walk up from behind him and sit down, not saying a word but just...being there. Edward wanted to know where Emmett ended up but didn't have the ability to ask. Setting his phone on the bar in front of himself, he ran a hand through his hair. It wasn't until the bartender from earlier came over and asked if he needed anything that he broke his silence. "Jack on the rocks."
"Edward..." Jasper began with a sigh.
"Jazz, I'll have this one and then we'll go. No matter what I say when this one is finished, you make my ass leave. I can't go home to Bella like this, though. My fucking hands are shaking."
"Alright. Just one. I still think, though, that you need to talk to Em."
"Are you kidding me?" Edward gasped. Taking the glass the bartender set in front of him and bringing it to his lips.
"No. Edward, Emmett never would have slept with her just because he wanted it as payment. That's bullshit. I mean, I know it looks bad but we should hear him out. Come on, man. It's Em. He's not your..."
"Don't you dare finish that sentence," Edward spat, downing the rest of the glass and setting it in front of him a little harder than was necessary. "My views on this have nothing to do with my father."
"Bullshit. The fact that you knew I wasn't going to say 'you're ex' but instead say about your dad proves that this is exactly what's going through your head. Tanya was messed up. She always has been. Clean or sober, she's always been broken beyond belief. She wasn't some innocent girl that Emmett took advantage of and we both know it. I think he was trying to help her."
"Why? Why would he care?"
"Maybe because they both knew she couldn't come to you anymore...and that he was trying to protect Bella."
"I could protect Bella fine on my own."
Jasper shook his head but didn't comment on it. "Well, Emmett took a cab home. Let me drop you off at your place and I'll drop Bella and Lanie off..."
"I'm not drunk, Jazz. I can make decisions for myself."
"I know that but this time it's not about you being drunk. It's about you not being able to control your anger around Emmett. All of the girls are at that house."
"I'm not an angry person. I wouldn't hurt them."
"What about Em? You really want to be around him and Lanie at the same time right now?"
"I'm going back with you to get my girls. Let's go. I'm fine."
"He has to be cheating, Bella. We all know what he did with Tanya and everyone says 'once a cheater, always a cheater' but there's only two options I can consider and both of them lead me to the same conclusion. He's been weird since Tanya died so I have to wonder if he was still screwing around with her or if there's someone else and he's just not good at lying about it. Either way, things aren't right."
"Well," Alice put in, with a frown, "if you look like that after having his kid and he still looks for it somewhere else, there isn't much hope for us other women."
Rosalie rolled her eyes but Bella did what she could to hide her laugh. "Rose, Ally's right. I've told you before that Lanie thought you could be a model once. Remember?"
"Not every guy wants a model," Rosalie argued. "Maybe I found that one guy that doesn't. Bells, are you sure Edward hasn't mentioned anything about Tanya and Emmett? You'd tell me, right?"
"Of course. Honestly, though, things were really...emotional...with Edward and her. The girl wanted his attention and I doubt she'd go about getting it by flaunting a hook up in his face. I'm not trying to say something negative about Emmett or anything but Tanya was hooked on my fiance. If she and Em were sleeping together, there's a chance Tanya would have thrown it back in Edward's face. I guess...I mean...Edward could have been keeping that from me. I just don't know."
"Do you think Edward ever...ya know...with her? I mean, I know he was with her before you two started dating but do you think..."
"No," Bella replied honestly, her hand coming to rest on her flat belly. "A couple years ago I was skeptical. Between his negative self image and the past that he seemed to have with women, I thought a relationship with him would have been doomed. He does use sex as a form of letting out frustration but he's home with me more often than he isn't...when he isn't at work that is. He was hurt when she died but it wasn't like someone who had lost someone they loved. It was more the circumstances that bothered him."
The girls got quiet when Lanie came in and handed Bella the cell phone. "He says he's on his way and that it's too late to call Embry but he'll let me tomorrow."
"Did he say what was holding them up?" Bella asked, glancing over at Rose and Alice. Surely the guys wouldn't have been spiteful enough to go to a strip club or somewhere that they shouldn't be. All three girls, though, were well aware that all three guys could do stupid shit when they were going through shitty times. Between Jasper watching Alice lose the baby, Edward finally starting to face his past, and Emmett and whatever was going on with him, the girls were understandably nervous. At least, that's how Bella felt and she couldn't blame the others for those same feelings.
When Alice's phone began to ring, she stepped into the other room to answer it, just as Lanie had stepped out to call her brother when Bella had started to worry. When Alice returned, her lips were pursed and she just shook her head. "I have no idea what's going on but I suspect it's something to do with Emmett and Edward. Jazz seems pretty pi...annoyed with them. He, uh, he said he couldn't find Emmett."
"What does that have to do with Eddie?" Lanie asked, looking to Alice.
Bella and Rosalie exchanged worried looks and Alice just shook her head. "Lanie, I'm sure things are fine with Edward. Look, Bella, our car is still here. Why don't you let me guys give you a ride home?"
"Lanie, I'll call Edward and let him know we're ready. I'm sure he just thought we weren't ready yet," Bella lied, heading out to the front porch. It was chilly but still warm in terms of their typical fall weather.
"Hello?" he answered on the first ring, his voice strained.
Bella took a second to find her voice. She didn't know what was going on but he was definitely upset about something. "Baby, it's me. Look, I know something's going on but Lanie is getting anxious and I'm honestly pretty tired myself..."
"I'm on my way," Edward said quickly, almost like he would kill anyone who might try to get in his way. Then, in the background, she heard him tell Jazz they were done looking.
"I know from Alice's call to Jasper that something went down with you and Emmett. Are you guys okay? Rosalie's upset and Jasper's reason for why you guys aren't here yet has Lanie worried. What's going on?"
"We don't know where Emmett is. Em and I just about went rounds tonight. I'll explain everything when we get home. I'm sorry it took so long. I was hoping the jackass had gone home like he said he was going to. He's definitely not there with you guys, right?"
"Right."
"We're already in the car and I'm coming down the boulevard. I'll be there as soon as I can. I shouldn't have left you to for this long..."
"You're fine. I just called because Lanie's so agitated. She's getting older, Edward. She knows when there's something bad going on. I'll let you go. I'd hate that you get into an accident..."
"Jazz is driving. It's fine."
"You have your car...oh, Edward," Bella's voice cracked, fear suddenly flowing through her veins. He didn't sound drunk, though.
"It's not what you think. I'll see you in a few minutes."
No sooner had Bella gone in and helped clean up the chips and salsa while Lanie carried plastics cups to the garbage and the other girls wrapped up the cookies they'd made, when a car pulled up. Assuming it was Edward, Bella and Lanie started putting on shoes and coats but the car drove away shortly after, causing a cautious look from Rosalie. Footsteps on the porch brought Bella to stand in front of Lanie and peer out. She about jumped out of her skin when she saw Emmett through the screen.
"Hey, man," Bella said, trying to keep her voice light, "the other guys have been trying to find you."
"I took a taxi."
"I see," Bella said awkwardly, stepping back to let him through. He didn't look any more drunk than Edward had sounded.
What seemed like five seconds later, Edward and Jasper were making their way up the same porch steps and Bella pushed the door open for them. Seeing both of the girls were ready, he called in a goodbye to Alice and Rosalie before holding the door open for Bella and his sister.
"Where have you been? We've been waiting for forever," Lanie said, only half teasing when he pulled her in for a hug.
Bella watched them closely, noting how tense Edward seemed to be despite how calm he was acting. By the time they were in the car, Bella was having trouble not fidgeting around. Irritability was an issue for her since she'd started having pregnancy symptoms. Feeling worried but knowing she'd have to wait until Lanie wasn't around them, Bella sent Rosalie a text. Keep me posted.
Edward and Lanie spent some time together watching TV while Bella jumped in the shower to calm her nerves. Something had her checking her phone often, wondering why nothing was coming back from Rosalie. It scared her to think they were drifting apart when they'd been so close for so many years. It was just about one when Bella heard Edward clear his throat. "Lanie, it's way late. You need to get to bed."
"Alright. Don't forget, though. You promised I could call Sarah and Embry both tomorrow."
"I remember. Get some sleep, kid."
"Night, Bella!" Lanie called through Edward's bedroom door as she went back to her room.
When the TV was clicked off and the cupboards in the kitchen were done being opened and closed, Edward came in and pulled off his shirt. Her body reacted to him but her mind was a little dizzying. "What's going on? Why the hell are you fighting with Emmett?"
When he was just in boxers and sitting down beside her, he finally spoke. "If I thought this was something that you needed to know immediately, I would have told you. Promise to hear me out, okay? I ran into Jimmy at the bar tonight. He recognized Emmett and wanted to know how well I knew him. According to some journals Tanya kept, Emmett was on a list of guys that she'd..."
"Emmett is cheating on Rose, isn't he?"
"I don't know. I swear I don't really know that. I do know they met up at least a few times before she died..."
"Why? What did she want with Emmett?"
"Drugs."
Bella sucked in a sharp breath before looking around for her phone. "No. No..."
Edward took her hand before she could reach it on the night stand. "Give them some time."
Angry but not wanting Lanie to hear, Bella angrily whispered, "Don't fucking tell me to give them time! Rosalie is my best friend. She needs to know this!"
"I'm very sure that Emmett is going to tell her. After Jimmy left, I confronted Emmett and he told me that he'd been dealing to her. I don't know how often."
"Well, what did he say? Was he sleeping with her on top of dealing to her? My best friend is living with a drug dealer...they're married..."
"Baby, please, I never would have let him there with Rosalie and that baby if I thought he was dangerous. Bells, this has to have been going on since that night they were together at Jasper's. I didn't exactly take time to listen to his explanations and according to him, he has some. I know what he did was wrong and tomorrow, you call Rose first thing in the morning and check on her, but I'm upset with him for reasons we don't have to discuss..."
"You were trying to keep her together and he was enabling her to fall back apart."
Edward's expression told her she'd nailed it. "I won't do this anymore with you. I won't..." his voice broke a little.
"I know you two were friends and I know those drugs pulled her further into her depression than she would have normally been. I'm sorry that she died, Edward. I'm not just saying that. You have every right to be angry with Emmett. Angry doesn't even begin to cover how I feel about him. Still, I need you to respect my decision. I need to call Rosalie. I need to know that she's okay."
"Alright," he sighed. "Why don't you just call to tell her you and Lanie made it home safe and hear that she's okay? I really want Emmett to be the one to tell her. If he doesn't tell her tonight, you say anything you want to her tomorrow and I won't stop you."
The phone rang and rang but just before going to voicemail, Rosalie's voice came through the phone in a breathless and sad way. "Rose?" Bella asked, suddenly tearing up herself.
"Oh, Bella, it's bad. I was so scared about the cheating but..."
"I know. Edward told me."
"Does he hate him?"
"I wouldn't say hate but he has every reason to be mad as hell. Are you okay? Is Emmett still there?"
"Yeah. He's downstairs in the kitchen. I can't...I can't even look at him right now. I can't believe we didn't wake up Jacks."
"He didn't hurt you did he?"
"Not physically. I asked him for a divorce. He's granting it."
"Is that for sure what you want?"
"He was dealing drugs to pay for our fucking nursery furniture. I can't forgive him for that."
"What about what happened with Tanya?"
"He's swearing that he only slept with her that one time. That was after he told me if I wanted him to leave, that he'd understand. He doesn't even care. It's that simple. He doesn't give a damn about losing me..."
"I don't think that's true but I think he knows what he did is horrible."
"I don't know what to do about any of this. I mean, he's not on them. I know that he's not actually taking them but he was selling. It wasn't large scale. I guess a few of his old friends gave them to him to sell when we ran into some financial troubles. He freaking told me the money came from a promotion at work. He always handled the bills so I didn't worry about it. My check is direct deposited into the bank and our bills were always taken care of. I never had a reason to question it."
"I don't even know what to say."
"He cried. The only time since I've met him that he's cried was the morning Jackson was born. He was crying hard enough I had to make him repeat himself a few times. I don't know what to say either. I was just so angry. I am so angry..."
"Is he staying there tonight?"
"I think so. On the couch. He's sure as hell not sleeping in our bed. Ever again."
"Rose, he does love you. I'm so sorry this happened."
"I never loved anyone before, Bella."
"I know, babe."
"I don't know that I'll ever love some else again. I have Jackson. That's good enough."
With a heavy heart, Bella promised to call the next day and set her phone on the table, relaying the conversation to Edward. "I'm pissed for other reasons, like I said, but I don't know the whole story. I know that Emmett loves her, though. The first day he met her, the day she like, nearly ran his ass over, he was in love. We all teased him about it at work. I just don't know why he's been doing this. They aren't that bad financially..."
"I don't know but she said he started acting weird when Tanya died. I'm betting he's feeling pretty damn guilty."
"He fucking should feel guilty."
"Edward, I know. It's just that I don't think he's been doing this since then and I don't think he's like...running around with a trunk full of them or whatever. I do think you should hear him out."
"I don't associate with guys like him," Edward said coldly.
"He was one of your two best friends less than five hours ago. Edward, he's not your..."
"Stop. Are you ready for bed. I shouldn't have had you and Lanie up so late. We were just worried about him. As pissed as I am, I needed to make sure he was okay."
Laying down beside her, he lifted himself up on his arm and kissed her belly. When his hand started rubbing over her belly, she felt content enough to not push him to talk about his supposedly lost best friend. "I'm really excited about this baby, Edward."
His smile let everything from the past couple hours fade away completely. If she had him, she had everything. "I know, angel. She's going to be beautiful," Edward smirked.
"It's a boy!" Bella teased, playfully sighing before reaching over to turn off the lights, knowing it really didn't matter but she was still excited to find out.
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