Chapter 53- White Shadows in the Mist
Chapter Soundtrack: "22 Love" by RUDE
& "Betelgeuse" by Joe Hertler and the Rainbow Seekers
Low-anchored cloud,
Newfoundland air,
Fountain-head and source of rivers,
Dew-cloth, dream-drapery
To avoid triggering the fifth trip-wire trap they had encountered in the forest, Zabuza motioned for Haku to stay back as he followed the ankle-high metal line. He stalked over moss and bramble, eyes scanning cautiously until he came to the branch it was wrapped around, and then undid the knot slowly. He pointed to an extra bit of line and directed Haku, "Hold that taught."
Haku held the wire and watched as Zabuza slackened the trap, wire sagging as its affixed projectiles slipped down to the ground. As with previous disarmed trap locations, Haku marked their path by sinking a needle into the bark of tree; a red tassel at the senbon's end was conspicuous.
"We are barely a mile in…" Haku noted, "How big is this place?"
"Huge. You're on the main island now. Kirigakure's close."
"And you're certain a patrol won't be here?"
"As certain as I can be when I really have no fucking idea." Zabuza told Haku as he marched on, "Patrols find the traps here to be an inconvenience, so they'll stick to the perimeter. They don't wander further in unless they detect something unusual."
"Your informant said we could be looking in here for days."
"Yeah. No one knows where Mangetsu dropped dead exactly." He snarked, "And we're not leaving without the Master Scroll."
"Not even if there's a confrontation? I don't want to risk my mission to oust the Akatsuki here." Haku didn't like the do-or-die conviction of his companion.
Zabuza grunted, "If there is, run if you want."
The elevation was noticeably higher than other regions of the island, stippled with the white birch trees that thrived in taiga climate. In the troughs of land where winter's snow had long since retreated from summer, small marshes and bogs were teeming with life. Birds and insects sang under the green, leafy boughs of birches. A hidden bittern's cry in the reeds drummed like drops of water in a glass jar, and Haku wondered at the odd pip-plumb sounds until Zabuza told him what it was.
As they undid the next trap, Haku noticed a portion of human skull peeking from beneath a patch of moss. It was not a rare sight in the boreal forest. Bodies and remains were littered throughout; some in undignified, exposed poses, and others melded with the earth as if they'd returned home.
Another mile into the birch haunt Zabuza said aloud, "It's weird how this place comes back."
"Comes back?"
"It's a battlefield. I don't know how many times it's been burned down, but the birches come back the fastest. Then everyone forgets and avoids it, the bodies decay, the forest grows, the snow falls again." The man noted, "Like we didn't matter."
Haku marked their place again, "Maybe it's trying to get a message across."
"'Round here, no one's listening."
Some morning mist had yet to clear, and so Haku willed it away with his Blood Limit. Haze thinned low on the slope as they hiked on, over another hill and down towards the next furrow of fresh water. The woodland soil must have been quite fertile. Between the trees there were mugworts, blue bead lilies, daises, and strawberries growing wild. He watched Zabuza pick some of the edible plants, then pull down his neck gaiter to eat them.
"Have you fought here before?" Haku asked as he plucked a strawberry for himself.
"Once, when I was young. Then I did patrols with the Black Ops in this area when I was older."
"Hidden Leaf doesn't leave battlefields looking like this." By this he meant cluttered with skeletons.
"Because Leaf moves on from its wars and buries the dead. Mist never stopped fighting." He tilted his head to regard Haku, "And do you really think…Leaf doesn't have its blemishes laying around somewhere? Even if you haven't seen them?"
"Maybe it does." Haku supposed.
"When all of this bullshit is over, this place will move on. It won't burn again. Teams might do work in here to clear the snares and mines. They won't send stupid little Genin dipshits for those tasks, maybe some bomb-squad specialists…"
"You really can imagine a peaceful village."
Zabuza pulled his neck gaiter up again, "I've always been able to do that. I just can't figure out what I'm supposed to do in a village like that."
"I can help you." Haku offered, "Figure it out."
"I doubt it."
"You have plenty of other skills. Mist's new leadership will come to depend on you, even if you aren't in the top echelon of administration."
"You're assuming that they haven't thrown me in prison in that scenario, Haku."
"I am assuming that, yes."
"Don't project too far into the future. Just focus on—" His sentence cut off when his foot stuck on something.
For a terrible, gut-wrenching moment, Haku feared that Zabuza had crossed a trip-wire and was about to be crushed or blown to pieces…but instead he'd treaded in a sticky substance. The swordsman could not free himself from the transparent, shimmering thread stretched over moss and twigs. What was more, Haku had never seen Zabuza's eyes go so wide in fright in all of his time knowing the man.
"What?" Haku chirped.
"Get out of here now." Was Zabuza's lone command.
Haku immediately took off.
It was unfortunate that they'd gone so far into the dense birch forest. Trying to follow the marked trail in reverse at great speed was risky, and he also guessed that Zabuza was not going to be able to escape with him. They had come to an agreement days ago that there would be no hard feelings if one had to abandon the other. In that event, they would come up with some way to stick to the plan and improvise.
Haku stepped lightly over the surface of a pond while in retreat…and then caught on something, tumbling abruptly underwater. He lost a gasp of air in his surprise, frantically looking around the pool for what had tripped him. No shinobi or traps were visible; only the thin glimmer of thread. Silk. It was woven between aquatic plants and sunken logs. It was everywhere. Hardly noticeable to the naked eye.
A force acting on the threads wound around Haku's arms and trunk, reeling him ashore where he sputtered and coughed. From a place unseen, the thin but powerful silk pulled him over the mossy hill and down the embankment again. At the bottom of the slope, he could see Zabuza was wrapped in sticky silk and suspended from a low tree branch, upright, struggling and cursing. The Seversword was pinned flat to his back in the snare. Haku's segment of silk went tight and suspended him next to Zabuza.
He had to ask, "Zabuza, what kind of jutsu is—?"
"Don't say anything. Don't admit anything." He had to coach the captured novice beside him, "I'll handle it and you keep your mouth shut. Don't say anything about Leaf, got it?"
"A Mist shinobi?" Haku presumed.
"One of the worst." Zabuza confirmed, "And we're not getting out of this."
Haku took a breath and tried to calm the fluttering in his stomach. This very well could crush their share of Jiraiya's strategy to interfere with the Akatsuki in Hidden Mist. Though he never believed he could avoid capture forever, Haku wasn't exactly sure what to do now that it'd happened. He was even less sure of what he thought when a stout woman in her sixties appeared from between the columns of trees. Each step she took was considered and light over the ground, the hallmark of a kunoichi. Her clothing was head-to-toe camouflage that matched birch bark; salt and pepper hair trimmed short and practical.
The old timer stopped in front of the pair swaying from silk line, squinting her black eyes at them. She poked a single finger where Zabuza's stomach ought to be beneath the bindings, and an angry snarl escaped him as he swung to and fro. Haku looked boggle-eyed between the two.
"You're dead." The old woman grinned a sharp-toothed smile characteristic of the Water Country.
"Looks like you died decades ago, you old fuck." Zabuza snapped.
"I make death look good, then." She was still smiling with glee, "You're as churlish as ever, Zabuza." She slid her sharp gaze over to Haku, "And this is?"
"None of your business, badger." Zabuza spat.
Haku recognized the not-so-endearing term and spoke up accidentally, "Your grandmother!"
She laughed.
"I mean, not me— I meant you. You're Zabuza's grandmother." Haku recalled, "Honesuki-sama."
The reverent address of the old kunoichi made Zabuza wretch, a paroxysm of rage and disbelief swirled into one as he struggled and simultaneously wanted to beat the ever loving crap out of Haku.
"It's good for you to know who your executioner will be." Honesuki nodded and folded her arms behind her back, "Yet I don't know exactly who I've caught in my web." She shrugged a shoulder and spoke quietly to something sitting there; a black diving bell spider, "Iehisa, do we know him? From any records?" She got some answer in the negative from her trained animal.
Honesuki migrated away from Zabuza and stopped in front of Haku, "What are you doing so close to Hidden Mist? I've got no background on you."
"Not only do I not want to tell you," Haku tried to keep it cordial, "But it's a long story and you probably wouldn't believe it."
"Young man, I've heard my share of crazy stories that turned out to be true."
Haku was curious about the Mist kunoichi, "Your spider helps you with this technique-?"
"Stop fucking talking to her!" Zabuza roared, "She's the enemy. She's in on it."
"In on what?" Honesuki growled.
"You're a nanny for the Akatsuki, you traitorous old bitch. You've let them have the village."
"What an accusation!" Her tone elevated with offense, "You want to blame me for the frauds holding my home hostage? You think I enjoy tip-toeing around and bowing my head to these scoundrels? They kill anyone and everyone who defies them. Why would I stick my neck out and offer it, then? Would you do that, Zabuza?"
"I thought you were a warrior who'd fight to the bitter end, Granny." He taunted.
Haku kept track of the valuable details revealed in the back-and-forth. For one thing, Honesuki had not denied the presence of the Akatsuki in Kirigakure. Rather, it seemed she had confirmed it and the hardships such occupation caused.
"I stayed to fight for it. I didn't run away like you did." Honesuki reminded him.
"You were complacent with the shadow regime that marched in and took over."
"I have to stay alive and play the long-con to win this. I can't declare my opposition for all of the world to hear." She lifted a long knife from a holster at her hip, turning it over in her hand, "I will not die in vain. All of my hard work…means something."
"So…you aren't supporting the Akatsuki?" Haku fished for particulars.
Zabuza barked at him to shut up.
"Zabuza," Honesuki treaded back to her grandson, "Do you have any remorse for abandoning your village? If not for besmirching the name of our family and our traditions, is there anything you regret?"
"No. Go on and carve me up with that knife. You've probably dreamed of this day."
She poked him gently in the stomach with her tip of her weapon and then stowed it away again, sighing, "I've dreamt of it, alright. But if I kill you here…no. I should turn you over. Then the regime won't question my "loyalty." I can work well beneath their suspicions."
"You're the one who suggested a rebellion in the first place! And you'd turn me over before I can—"
"I never started a rebellion or suggested one, you impudent grub!" She was pacing, "I wasn't going to do anything until I knew you were prepared to commit with me! And you sulked off to be a nukenin, you useless boy! Forsook me twice!" Honesuki riffled around her hip pouch and lifted a tool scroll in the air, "But I knew you'd be back to come looking for this."
Haku gasped at the sight of what he assumed to be the Master Scroll for the Seven Swordsmen's blades. The old woman waved it in Zabuza's face. He went dumb and still at the sight before he started to tremble in fury.
"You are so amusingly single-minded." Honesuki grinned again, "You want the other swords in here, don't you? Should've come long ago to collect this, like I did. I was certain I would see you again if I kept watch over the haunt."
"Give that to me."
"Over your dead body."
Haku held his breath.
Zabuza was thrashing, "There's no point in stopping me. I'm going to free the village-!"
"Lies! All lies! You selfish runt. You want this? Eh-hee-hee-hee! How funny! How deserving." Honesuki cracked up, "Say you're sorry. Beg for my mercy. Say you're sorry for dishonoring my only son— your father. Apologize to him so his ghost can hear you!"
"I've got no apologies for that fucking weakling!"
Honesuki leapt and turned in a clean roundhouse kick that knocked Zabuza down from his suspended thread, leaving him bound face-first on the ground. Infuriated, the old woman tearfully stomped on his back, "You—! You embarrassment. You ingrate. My whole world and all of my joy, in spite of the hard times— you always found a way to spit in my face! I wanted to give you everything!" She was crying. She was grinding Zabuza's face into the mud, fit to suffocate him.
"Honesuki-sama please!" Haku called out to her, "I need him! Gama-sennin and I need him!"
She stilled, "What?"
"We have a way…a way to help your village and stop the Akatsuki. I'm responsible for it, and for Zabuza." He took a chance and confessed, "My name is Haku."
"Feh!" She chuckled with teary eyes, "Why do you need my grandson? He's awful."
"He is awful, but I also think he's the only one who can help me do this."
Honesuki lifted her foot and rolled Zabuza over, mud-streaked as he gasped for breath. She crossed back to Haku and frowned, "What does a pretty doll like you have to do with Jiraiya of the Legendary Three?"
"I'm one of his students."
"Doesn't look like it. You're too young. His students fought in the Third Great War."
"I am, please believe me. I grew up in the Hidden Leaf village after I left the Water Country. Sensei trained me and my teammates as Genin. We were each unwanted rejects in our homelands. We were kept as wards of the state under the Third Hokage's mandate."
She sniffed, "Cheeky little liar."
"It's not a lie. The current Kazekage was one of those teammates, and the Fourth Hokage's son as well. They're my best friends. We're working together."
Zabuza sputtered on the ground, surprised by Naruto's identity, "Fourth Hokage's—?"
Honesuki tightened the silk line around her grandson to squeeze him back to silence. She kept her attention on Haku, "So you have friends in high places, is that what you're telling me?"
"Yes. And we know what's going on in Kirigakure. We have to stop it before the same happens to all of the great villages."
"It might be too late, boy."
"It isn't."
"I thought I had friends in high places too before they were killed. I'm down to my last hope with this Mei girl running around in the wilds…hoping she's been getting my updates." Honesuki's shoulders slumped, "If you are who you say you are, then I'd be stupid to deliver you to the Akatsuki. No one expects a collaborator like you."
"I—"
"Or…you made this tale up out of desperation, and you're just a greedy apprentice hoping to get your hands on one of Mist's legendary swords." The old woman deduced.
"I honestly don't care about those weapons." Haku told her, "Burn the scroll. It makes no difference to me."
"I might." She was amused as Zabuza wriggled and yowled behind her on the forest floor.
"I would rather be talking to Mei, and learning about how I can help." Haku clarified his intentions.
"Give me some proof. I want to believe you." Honesuki offered, "I want to know that I can expect other great villages to join us in the fight for Mist's freedom."
"I…" Haku puzzled for a moment, "I think in the back pocket of my bag we have an agreement…"
Honesuki regarded him with a sandpaper stare before circling behind Haku, "No tricks." Her knife cut through her spider's iron-strong thread. The woman reached for the travel bag on Haku's back, riffling around, "Eh? Why is there hay in here?"
"That's for my rabbit. The other zipper—"
"Ah, this must be it." Honesuki discovered the contractual agreement that Jiraiya had presented to Zabuza, and it contained both men's signatures, "Well, well, this is a rarity. My hateful grandson discards me, but accepts the terms of the Toad Sage? I could scream." She rolled up the document, "What a complex ruse this would be if it were untrue…"
"Believe me, my Sensei takes pride in what he writes. We would never fake anything like that—"
"Yes, yes, I know— those books, a pervert—" She waved away the explanation and then bent down to wipe her sleeve against Zabuza's muddy face, "So you threw in your lot with outsiders out of desperation, Zabuza? I really do find that astounding for a stubborn ass like you."
"No one's tried it yet. It could work." Zabuza defended the decision.
"I'm still not going to let you go." Honesuki warned her grandson, "You've done so much harm…I don't know if I can entrust such an important mission to the likes of you…"
She reached for the knife at her hip and lashed out with a single stroke, severing all of the spider silk that had imprisoned Haku. His feet met the ground and he shook his aching limbs out.
"Haku. You were born in this country, hm? Is that why you are romanticizing the idea of freeing the Mist Village?" Honesuki wondered, "That's a dangerous daydream."
"No, I…want to protect my friends. They're jinchuriki. This isn't only about your village or its inhabitants, not for me. I'm sorry to say." Haku admitted.
"So you are selfish…but for love." Honesuki deduced, "And he is selfish because of hate. I think it is you who I can trust."
"I hope that you will, Honesuki-sama."
"Let me tell you something, Haku, if you don't already know." She was unruffled by her spider, Iehisa, crawling over her cheek and up to the top of her head, "The one who created the fake Mizukage, the fake Yagura-sama…he rarely appears, but when he does his panderers call him Tasū. That's what he wants to be called. Quite an alias, isn't it?"
Tasū meant many or numerous. Haku did not like the significance of the codename.
"I don't know what role that masked man plays in the Akatsuki…though he is wise and tactically skilled. He spoke once to my Sealing Corps committee to keep us in line. I knew then I couldn't cross him." Honesuki went on, "His voice and presence…he…seems middle-aged. Not yet old, but I could tell that he's not of my generation or of yours. Something in-between in years. Would you know who this person is?"
"I don't. I was hoping you could tell me." The hair on the back of his neck was on end.
"I've been searching for answers too. Who is this person? How did he gain so much control? I still don't know how he disposed of Yagura-sama so quietly…" She looked Haku in the eye, "Make sure your Toad master knows. The leaders working with you— tell them to beware someone of that description. He could be anyone. He could be anywhere."
"I will, thank you, Honesuki-sama." Haku was compelled to bow to her for sharing something so critical.
"Now, we will be going." With unlikely strength for her age, the kunoichi hoisted Zabuza to his feet, "This ungrateful man will be punished for betraying his bonds. And you, Haku…be sure you tread carefully in this land. Take this." She handed off the Master Scroll to him, "Find those who are worthy of wielding these weapons, and please help my village."
He held out his hands and accepted the tool scroll, sharing a helpless look with Zabuza as the old woman dragged him away. Haku tried to imagine Honesuki turning in her grandson to appease the Hunter Corps and fraudulent leader of Hidden Mist, hoping to distract from the fact that she was funneling information to Terumi Mei. But of course, that cover would only last Honesuki until the Intel Division tortured more information out of Zabuza, 'In which case she'd be incriminated anyway…'
Haku caught up to them after a short sprint, "Honesuki-sama, you shouldn't turn Zabuza over. Any Intel specialist will see what you've been doing if they use—"
"They won't see anything in his mind that I lock down with my Sealing Jutsu. He won't even remember this meeting in the haunt when I'm through with him." Honesuki shot down Haku's concerns, "No Intel officer is going to find a damn thing about this day in my idiot grandson's head. I'll even make him forget about you."
"But what if they notice an interfering Seal and question you?"
"No one is going to notice, they're all amateur scanners. All the talented Genjutsu specialists and Intel Admins were tortured and killed by the end of last year." The old woman gruffed, "So don't worry about me, boy. Go save us. Don't waste any more time here."
"I…" Haku stopped in his tracks, "I…can't let you take him."
Honesuki violently dropped Zabuza, ignoring his Ow-fuck! Bitch-! growls when she rounded on Haku impatiently, "Do you not understand that this is personal? I want him to pay for what he's done to my family. To pay for his absence! He could have helped me save this place long ago!"
"He has a chance to do it now!"
"Oh heaven, strike me where I stand! I let you off the hook, Haku! At least surrender him to me without whining. Is it the Seversword you want? Yes of course, we'll get it off his back and you can return it to the Master Scroll…"
"Keep your fucking mitts off it, hag!" Zabuza barked.
"I'm responsible for him. He's my subordinate." Haku explained, "Give me this chance. I know you don't believe in him, but could you try to believe in me? You don't know me, and I hardly know you…but he isn't exactly what he once was; we're both familiar with what Zabuza was like."
"And you really think you'll get him in line? Rehabilitate him somehow?"
"I've been trying." Haku said the words so, so wearily, "And it's been…well…I haven't given up yet."
"But you might." The old woman wrinkled her brow as if to say, I already have.
"He still made a promise to Gama-sennin. I'm going to make sure that he—"
"Does it have to be spelled out for you, Dewdrop?" Honesuki interrupted him, "This is my pound of flesh. I am turning him over personally to Commander Nigai of the Hunter Corps. That'll teach him a lesson."
Zabuza had to chime in angrily, "That psycho's got nothing on me—"
"It isn't about you, Zabuza. It's about saving my skin and convincing the regime that I'm not out to undermine them." She kicked him in the shoulder while he lay on the ground, "I am not turning you loose."
"Please," Haku's voice was tinged with desperation, "Give him to me. You can seek recompense some other time."
Honesuki's unfriendliest stare locked onto Haku, sizing him up, and signaled to Zabuza that his companion had pushed his luck too far. Before he could issue a verbal warning, the old woman pressed down on her grandson's head with her foot, silencing him in mud and moss again.
"I may have been too lenient." Honesuki decided, "I've heard quite enough."
Haku's next attempt to appeal was cut short as Honesuki drew her long knife and charged, startling him back into a pre-spun web of silk between trees. After the trap threads tangled around him, Honesuki sliced a gash down Haku's front as if she were cleaving jungle foliage. His Water Clone splashed apart.
The old woman clucked her tongue, "Huh. Well, he's quick…" She looked over her shoulder at Zabuza, "You stay here. I'm going to cut that boy's tongue out."
Somewhere beyond the next knoll patched with greenery and bramble, Haku rolled open the Master Scroll, breathing shallowly while trying to make sense of it, 'If she's serious, she just needs to trap me in spider silk again…I need Nuibari. The real sword!'
Preceding the calligraphic list of weapons was a space for the blood of "keepers." It had never been Haku's intention to assume such a role, but he could think of no other way to awaken unresponsive tool seals on the parchment. Haku cut open the tip of his forefinger on the edge of a kunai, dabbing the characters of his name on the scroll, 'I hope this works. I didn't actually ask Zabuza about the process. I thought he'd be the one handling it…'
"Dewdrop!" Honesuki called out into the forest, "Are we done here? If you've decided to run away, I'll take my grandson and return to Mist."
Over the space reserved for Sewing Needle, Haku swiped blood and tapped, gladly surprised that the Longsword appeared in a puff of smoke. He closed the Master Scroll and tucked it into his belt, 'This is it. It's not the ersatz weapon I've been made to practice with.' Haku was mildly concerned over the fact that Nuibari felt alive in his hand. Restless and humming. Some presence within the needle was searching him and trying to understand him. When it nipped for a few crumbs of his chakra, he allowed it, 'Let that be our introduction...'
Haku stood and formed hand signs, conjuring a silent curtain of snow in the hope that it would expose hidden spider threads. Snowflakes began to cling to the network of silk, which greatly displeased Honesuki as she crested the hill, "Eh? You want to give me grief, boy? That will be your final mistake…"
Though it was unsportsmanlike to do so, Haku pitched Nuibari at the woman which (to his surprise yet again) accelerated with some enigmatic, supernatural physics to pierce Honesuki's upper arm as she tried to dodge. In the next moment, Nuibari's other freakish features manifested, as it made a full turn of its own accord, mid-air, with hardly any instruction from Haku, to stick a bit of the woman's calf as it sailed back to Haku's waiting hand. Honesuki stumbled with a screech and cut herself free of the sword's wire with her knife.
Haku moved between the birches back in Zabuza's direction, keeping the kunoichi in his peripheral, 'I didn't think it could do that…' Ever curious, he slashed at exposed spider threads with Nuibari's piercing edge and snipping them apart, 'Maybe any chakra-imbued weapon can cut these…so Zabuza can—'
He side-stepped a paper bomb explosion that Honesuki intentionally set off. She was running amok with the years-old traps scattered throughout the wood, flanking Haku at a slower pace. Clearly the old woman could not move very fast, but neither could he, Haku thought as he struggled his way out of another lattice of spider silk.
Honesuki cackled as she pulled back on a thread, dragging Zabuza away while Haku cut himself free, "Honesuki-sama, stop!" He threw Nuibari again and sliced through the leash. Still face-down on the ground and wrapped from neck to toes, Zabuza was wiggling and giving indiscernible orders. Haku found it easy to ignore his ornery associate when he crossed blades with Honesuki, starting a shoving match and kicking up bead lilies.
"I thought you said you didn't care about Mist's swords!" She had some strength, pushing back against the youngblood as their weapons sparked.
"I don't!"
"And here you are using one to fight a defenseless old lady!"
"In what way are you defenseless?" Spittle flew from Haku's mouth as he shouted, both tiring of the bout and hopping away from each other.
Honesuki sheathed her knife and formed hand signs, using a Sealing jutsu Haku did not recognize. When he pitched Nuibari at her, it stuck Honesuki in her shoulder…though it gave her the opportunity to close her hand around the Longsword. At the touch of her Sealing technique, Nuibari shuddered and then disappeared in a puff of smoke.
Haku stared like a shell-shocked rabbit as Honesuki dusted her hands, "Ha! Every summoned tool has a weakness! They are tethered to seals, and all I have to do is neutralize them…then pop! Away they go." She twirled her trusty knife in her palm, "Summon that needle again, I dare you! I'll just send it back to the scroll!"
Blood splotches soaked Honesuki's fatigues. Snowflakes clung to the webs stretched between the boughs behind her, a picturesque refraction of light. Haku backed closer toward Zabuza, hoping he would have a split-second to tear the man free so they could make a run for it. As Honesuki leapt and coordinated another spider silk snare with Iehisa, Haku snapped his hand fan out of his sleeve. A gust of Wind Nature propelled Honesuki and her threads away with one swing of the fan, 'Now is my chance!' He came within an arm's length of Zabuza when the silk bindings around the man suddenly began to strain and then shred.
Haku had nary a moment to duck when Honesuki willed a cable of spider threads to collect the Seversword from Zabuza's back. The blade soared toward her and nearly took Haku's head off. He glanced back over his shoulder, shocked to see the old woman arm herself with the hefty weapon, 'Maybe that's where Zabuza got his fortitude from…'
She lashed out, pupetting the sword in a centrifugal swing by her threads, hacking the thin trunks of birches and all else that got in the way. Haku and Zabuza dove in opposite directions to avoid the reckless attack. Zabuza was sloughing off the last tatters of spider silk on him, his face muddy and scratched.
Haku wanted to reason with him, "Zabuza, don't try to get the sword back! She's trying to bait you—"
The rogue ninja rushed ahead anyway.
A fair amount of snow had accumulated, and so Haku took it upon himself to freeze the ground until it was slick. Though Zabuza managed to keep his balance as he pitched forward down the hill, righting himself in the air to land on a tree branch…Honesuki skidded on the ice and toppled backwards. Her whirling of the Seversword sent it spinning violently, cutting through the tree Zabuza landed in. Haku sucked wind several times in fright at the near-misses, all landing in a heap with a crash.
He hurried forward to find the grandmother and grandson in a tug-of-war, sliding in the snowy haunt, howling at each other. Honesuki had stubbornly attached additional threads to Kubikiribōchō while Zabuza pulled back on the hilt with all of his might. The two fell apart with startled cries when the sword disappeared.
Nearby, Haku was scowling, kneeled down over the open Master Scroll. He had returned the Seversword to its storage space to remove it from the equation.
"Don't try to play peacemaker, Dewdrop!" Honesuki roared at Haku as she got back on her feet.
"Just give it up, you fangled-toothed bitch!" Zabuza was still irate, as expected.
Impatient with the two of them, Haku unleashed a gust of Wind Nature with his fan, putting more space between them. He then tried to direct Zabuza, "We have what we need, so let's go."
He didn't have any time to see if Zabuza was protesting the order: Honesuki had changed directions and charged at Haku, prepared to drive her knife into him, "I told you that this—!" Haku swung his fan reactively, hoping to fling her away, but a shimmering Sealing technique the woman had prepared nullified the Wind Element in his attack. Honesuki pounced on him, knocking the breath out of Haku as they fell to the ground, "—is personal!"
Thank goodness he timed his dodge well— Haku tilted his head so the stabbing motion of her knife only nicked his ear. She nearly had him dead in the face. He kicked her up in a half-somersault to toss the woman away, feeling new sticky threads mat him down the ground. Honesuki rolled in snowy bramble and flowers, tiredly pushing to her feet again, panting, "Get in my way and I'll kill you! I don't care who you are! Some liar or savior…I'll-!"
A gigantic, webbed hand flattened her. Haku shrieked in spite of himself.
He hadn't expected it. He looked up slowly to see a red, house-sized toad that was curious about the elderly kunoichi it had pinned underfoot. It took Haku a moment to realize it was Gamakichi— nearly full grown. He was gawking at the summon, his mouth flapping uselessly in an attempt to form words.
"Oh, hey Haku." The toad recognized a familiar face, "What's this old lady's problem? Ouch. She's sticking me with something."
"That's Honesuki-sama…um. Why don't you let her up now?" Haku suggested, realizing, though it pained his brain to make sense of it, that it was Zabuza standing on top of the giant toad's head. Not Jiraiya or Naruto.
"Alright." Gamakichi lifted his hand, "Sorry about that, Granny."
Flabbergasted, Honesuki scuttled backwards to collapse on a mossy tree stump, then stared up at the fantastic creature. She had been looking for proof earlier, but at the moment she couldn't mentally negotiate such undeniable evidence that the Legendary Toad Sage had gotten involved with her grandson after all.
"Hey new guy." Gamakichi spoke up again, "Get off my head."
With an unfriendly grunt, Zabuza returned to the forest floor and plucked Haku up by the scruff of his tunic, "Stand up. Don't look so shocked."
"Sensei actually let you join the Toad Summoning Contract?" Up until this point, such a detail had escaped Haku's notice.
"With provisions, yeah."
"Provisions?"
"Basically, if I do anything either of you disapprove of, its license to get me killed." Zabuza recalled, "It's not like he didn't tell these things," He gestured up at Gamakichi, who was understandably offended, "About me and what to expect."
"Right, so quit disrespecting me and call me by my name. Gamakichi." The toad insisted, "Who the heck are you again? Jiraiya-sama said something about a hostile temp…"
"Momochi Zabuza."
"Ah, that's right."
Honesuki wobbled to her feet and Haku took pity on her, knowing that however much this situation overwhelmed him, she must have felt infinitely out of sorts. He apologized and set a hand on her punctured shoulder, "I'm sorry, Honesuki-sama. I didn't want to hurt you like that. We weren't lying, but that didn't seem to matter to you…"
She turned her head curiously to watch a healing light glow lantern-soft over her injury, "…how unusual."
"I'm sorry for all the trouble."
"Hmf. And I had thought you were another common assassin." Honesuki muttered, "Are you a healer by nature, Haku?"
"Not exactly. But I've admired my teachers and try to make the most of what they've taught me."
She shook her head and wore a rueful smile, "You are a contradiction."
"I think I might be, yes."
"There are worse things to be." Honesuki waved away his efforts, "These aren't serious. I'm mended for now." Her glittering eyes settled on Zabuza, "And you…hardly deserve the honor of using such a summoning contract…but I wouldn't want to step on the toes of Gama-sennin and muck with his plans, now would I?"
"You've just got to make everything difficult." Zabuza folded his arms, giving her leery side-eye, "If you've got beef with me, badger, then save it for after we settle things in Kirigakure. I never said I wasn't willing to hash it out."
"You mean let me beat you senseless?"
"I didn't say that either. Fuckin' putting words in my mouth…"
Honesuki sighed wearily, "Leave. Before I change my mind again."
Gamakichi was dismissed in a cloud of smoke, and without a word of farewell Zabuza turned around to stalk his way through the birch haunt. Haku followed after him and willed the snowfall to stop. He could only hope for an uneventful journey off of the island, preferably with no other ninja encounters or traps triggered.
Since he couldn't help but wonder what Honesuki intended to do now, Haku turned back to see her standing still, observing their retreat. There was a thin-lipped smile on her face. A thankful expression.
"You weren't at the Jounin Council Meeting this morning." Kakashi said as he stopped beside a park bench, where he'd finally found his wayward nephew, "Too many truancies there won't be excused unless you have missions scheduled."
"I do have one. Tonight." Sato defended in a strange, faraway voice.
"Well if it's tonight, then you could have showed up for a morning meeting." His uncle reasoned.
Slumped on the bench, Sato said nothing as he gazed out at the autumn molt of the forest.
Nearby, Pakkun and Bull were coaching Kakashi's new puppies through rigorous command drills. When Tolsi and Gattsu successfully responded to sit, roll-over, etc. the pups were rewarded with rope toy tug-of-war and tennis balls to chase. Kakashi's ears were trained on the dogs behind him, but kept his eyes on Sato as it seemed more and more apparent that the young man was now a shell with hardly any internal substance left.
"Kurenai thinks you're not eating." Kakashi observed off-the-cuff.
The statement did not need much clarification from Sato. He had a withered look about him. He sat without speaking to his uncle, his eyes half-shut.
"Can you try to…not worry?" Kakashi recommended as he took a seat on the bench beside Sato, "Tama seems to be alright, for now. She's spoken to me. I'll be catching up with Gai later too. He's been preoccupied…" Kakashi didn't want to get into the specifics of how Gai had been running defense to deter all of the torments Maito Ken had cooked up for Sato.
Kakashi acknowledged, "I know it's hard. Please try to keep your appointments with Dr. Iwao."
"I don't want to see her."
"You need to go."
"I don't need anything."
"I used to say that, but I didn't get better by skipping counseling appointments. That only made things worse."
"All the things you went through…" Sato said softly, "Were not of your own making. Your pain wasn't this."
"Are you sure it wasn't? That I didn't cause some of my own problems?" Kakashi challenged the idea.
"It's not the same, Kakashi. You don't understand."
"Even if what you're going through isn't the same experience as mine, don't tell me I don't understand." The man cautioned.
A long quiet prevailed as red leaves drifted down in the sprawling park. The line of dogs marched the pebbled hiking path, Tolsi and Gattsu obediently mimicking the senior pack members. Kakashi could feel it like electricity. There was pain, so much pain beside him. A renouncement of all things glowed off of Sato, as if he couldn't believe he was existing this way. As if his brain were constantly re-setting and trying to evaluate a horrific reality.
Sato spoke again in a nearly inaudible voice, and Kakashi asked him to repeat it.
"Living was a mistake." Sato said as if he were an enlightened monk, blackened by truth.
"No, it wasn't." Kakashi protested, "Call it anything but a mistake."
"You saw." Sato reminded him.
"That day—"
"I was gone."
A small shake of Kakashi's head, "You weren't."
"It was raining when I died. Far away. I wasn't here…I'm not supposed to be here. To ruin everything."
For the first time in years, there were fearful thorns prickling in Kakashi's stomach. His eyes moistened. He understood this. He understood what Sato was saying. But he couldn't let his nephew actually believe those words, which were a pure byproduct of despair.
"What makes you think…things would have been any less miserable in your absence?" Kakashi handed him a counterpoint.
"I just know it."
"You really don't, Sato."
"I can't take it anymore." The young man muttered.
"You have to keep going. Time will pass and it won't be so heavy." Kakashi knew the encouragement was probably insufficient, "I'm here if you need me."
When Sato slowly rose to stand, his uncle quickly added, "This time I am here. I know I wasn't before…and I didn't do…couldn't do most of the things you needed me to. That hurt you too— I hurt you."
Sato's blue gaze slipped towards his uncle, tired and curious.
"We can both agree that I was a no-show and my reasons weren't good enough. Not when Rin needed me, or Tenzo…not for you or Semi. I stayed away from everyone who needed to depend on me." Kakashi admitted, "I even ignored my Dad's pain because I believed what people were saying about him. Until he was gone."
"You were a kid." Sato reminded him, "It's hard to get things right when you're a kid."
"I might've saved him."
"Kakashi, if Grandpa couldn't even hold on for the sake of his own children, don't think for a second anything was going to stop him." Sato had an erudite take on the situation, "It never meant he didn't love you. It was that the things he couldn't change were insurmountable."
Kakashi stared, seated on the bench, and watched his nephew trudge away eastward through park grounds. Perhaps to meet with his team, or train, or hide, or end his life. Kakashi was paralyzed as he watched because he understood, in a ferly rush to the head; that Sato had become a mouthpiece for his long deceased father. The grandson had suffered the same missteps, and was grappling with his next course of action.
Once Sato was long out of sight, Kakashi fought off the pins and needles in his limbs to finally stand. He wasn't sure if he would see his last surviving relative later. No. That was no way to think. He could do something. He could literally do any one thing, one bit more than nothing to possibly dissuade an exit Sato might be contemplating. Heart pattering, Kakashi formed the strings of a plan while on the move, beckoning his dogs to keep up as he left the park.
"Bull, take Tolsi and Gattsu home. Make sure that Akino is comfortable." Kakashi instructed before the massive dog gamboled off with his puppy companions, "Pakkun…"
"You want me to watch him?" Pakkun presumed.
"Please make sure Sato doesn't do anything rash today."
"Kakashi, if he's serious he'll have ways of avoiding me."
"I don't know if he is serious or not. Just tail him for the rest of the day until he joins his team."
"Fine. What are you gonna do?"
"I'm going to get some help." Kakashi decided, "Do some things that I couldn't do for Dad."
Ten minutes later, Kakashi intruded upon the limited clearance area of the ANBU headquarters, politely greeting his contemporaries as he strolled into the subterranean command center. Though retired officially from ANBU, he was always warmly welcomed when he dropped by. As it so happened, there was a potluck of warm lunch trays in the break room, most of which had been provided by Captain Kegon and Lieutenant Commander Kakima, but Kakashi avoided the feast.
Rounding the corner into the locker room Kakashi loudly demanded, "Tenzo."
The other four occupants of the tiled space startled, Tenzo less so, and then evacuated the room when Kakashi shooed them away. Some dressed and some relocated to the showers.
Damp and shirtless, Tenzo's eyebrows were raised, "What are you doing here?"
"You're off duty?"
"Just now, yes. I have to do some shopping—"
"Hurry up." Kakashi plucked the jumper from Tenzo's hands and pulled it down over the man's head, dressing him, "My nephew is in crisis."
"So what has that got to do with me?!"
"I need a sidekick. An assistant. I want to violence-proof Sato's flat before he gets back to it."
Stammering, "You w-what-?"
"I think he's suicidal."
"So have a watch assigned to him! Contact the SHA!" Tenzo adjusted his clothing, flustered.
"I will, but I want to take immediate precautions."
Sighing, Tenzo rested his head against the metal of a locker before fetching his bag and shutting it, "Kakashi, you can't eliminate every risk. What would work better is to make sure Sato sees a counselor, or is under observation in a facility."
"I'll talk to Iwao-san later, maybe she'll do a house visit. Come on." Kakashi led the way out, ignoring how Tenzo longingly looked toward the break room's smorgasbord.
They departed from HQ together, heading southwest through the village, scaling the apartment complex's side to enter Sato's flat through an open window. The home seemed to be in order with the exception of a decorative pillow and blanket left on the area rug. Kakashi examined how the space had been lived in: cabinets and refrigerator were lacking in food. Tea canisters sat on the kitchen counter. No dishes in the sink. No trash in the bin. In the bathroom and bedroom, all seemed to be untouched, including a made bed that looked like it had not been slept in for days.
Back in the dining area, Tenzo was fiddling inquisitively with a box of girly items, "What's all this?"
"Leave that. That should stay here." Kakashi recommended, pointing to photo frames hung on the walls, "Can you take those down?"
"All of them?"
"All of them."
Befuddled, Tenzo crossed the room to do as Kakashi asked. Meanwhile, Kakashi ransacked the utility closet, pilfering tools and cleaners, abducting cutlery and knives from kitchen drawers. He stuffed most of it in a plastic bin, searching for bottled medications to steal as well.
"Are you really doing this?" Tenzo could hardly believe what he was partaking in, "Kakashi, these are his things. You can't just take them."
"He'll hurt himself."
"With a butter spreader?" Tenzo doubted it.
"I'm taking it. The photos can come out of the frames, leave them here."
"He wouldn't break this glass—"
"Tenzo…" Kakashi held up a hand to shush him, and his friend frowned at the gesture.
Once the living area was preposterously altered, Kakashi moved on to the bedroom and confiscated any bit of fabric or bedding that could possibly suffocate an adult. Though there were only a few spare weapons and tool scrolls in the room, Kakashi took those also. He collected all on the kitchen table and examined the pile.
"Now what?" Tenzo wondered, carefully extracting photos from frames.
"We move this to my place."
"Really?" Tenzo sniffed.
"I have the spare closet. I'll keep this there."
"This is ridiculous, Kakashi. He isn't going to do anything!"
"I'll be back shortly." Kakashi left with the most untrustworthy items first, while Tenzo continued to ruminate on what the hell he was doing here.
He had the gist of the "Hatake Sato situation," since Kakashi had sort of filled him in on the incident a few days ago. Maito Tama had been involved. Gai's family was involved. And by now most of the village had perpetuated a rumor (or five) that may loosely have been based in truth, but took on multiple iterations to slander and isolate Sato. The young man was now persona non grata.
Kakashi had tried to contain some of the tumult, but the social anguish of his nephew had reached critical mass, by the look of it. 'It must have made him think…about the White Fang.' Tenzo supposed, his heart sinking, 'He's scared. I haven't seen Kakashi this scared.' Kakashi was taking no chances. He wanted to reduce self-destructive opportunities his nephew might seek out in a dark hour.
'But how does this really help? Sato is a shinobi! He can go anywhere to off himself. He has his own weapons on him, or can steal weapons from others. He can take a trip from a cliff by the Naka River…Frankly, none of this does a lick of good.' Tenzo understood that in fact it had little to do with what Sato might decide to do. It had more to do with what Kakashi was in control of.
After several return trips with Tenzo's help, most of the "unsafe" items were transported across town to Kakashi's home. Tenzo humored the harebrained precautions, choosing not to critique Kakashi's large oversights and rationale gaps. His emotions were swinging like a pendulum. Though his eyes were open and seeing, Kakashi was staring into the past at his father's face. When he blinked at the present, he would see Sato's. That much, at least, Tenzo could guess.
The project ate up a chunk of time in the early afternoon. Then came a knock on the condo's door, riling up Tolsi and Gattsu as the pups charged about the place, barking. Biscuit the dog herded the youngsters away from the genkan so Kakashi could answer.
Tama was on the other side of the door, concerned, "Sensei?"
"Oh." Kakashi's brain recalibrated, "Tama-chan."
She peeked into the living area where the dogs sat in a huddle of self-control, no jumping or woofs, and Akino the hound was convalescing on a large, cushiony dog bed in the corner. "Kaka-sensei, you're an hour and forty-five minutes late for the training evaluation you scheduled. Did you…decide not to oversee us today?"
Tama did a double-take, noticing a mish mash of knives, pill bottles, cleaner jugs and sprays, and various other household commodities crowding Kakashi's dining table. The man stood awkwardly with no explanation as it dawned on her that none of it belonged to him. As if that were not evidence enough, Tenzo hopped through the open dinette window with an armful of cords and heavy, blunt objects, "This is the last—!" He spied Tama at the door, "Of it…" He too stood awkwardly.
Ah, Tama thought to herself; this was worse than she thought. She had quickly sought out Ino days ago to rip her a new one and rebuke her friend's breach of confidentiality (knowing Sakura had said nothing at all). She'd also fretted over how Sato's welfare and her own welfare had plummeted, and that the begging-for-forgiveness/too-little-too-late encounter with Ino (and her subsequent, scathing forgiveness of Ino) had not changed anything. More than she wanted to, Tama had to think about Sato as his life was very publically demolished. There had been no grace. No privacy. All of that pain was out in the open. That had been the last thing Tama wished for.
And now as Kakashi sputtered out a feeble excuse, "Sorry, Tama…I lost track of time today. Got caught up—" Her eyes welled with tears as she understood. This was some sort of preventative measure that could indicate Sato was not a very willing participant in life anymore. She had not wished that on him either.
"No, no." Kakashi noticed the tears start, "Why don't you come in for a minute and rinse your face? There are fresh towels in the washroom. I'll be done in a minute and then I'll accompany you to the field…"
Tama nodded in silent grief as she floated into the home, squeezing her eyes shut as she passed Tenzo, and hastily closed the door of the half bath behind her. She twisted the cold water tap on and tried to breathe.
Here was the terrible feeling again. She'd gone more than two days without it, almost felt normal before it started to creep back. It trickled back as she noticed the village-wide whispers about Sato and his infidelity. Though Tama corrected accounts where and when she could, and scolded those who were out of line, her time at home had been absolute hellstew. The breakup rumor had gotten around to Maito Ken's ears.
Though her initial lie to her father had been an attempt to save some face, it had only amplified Ken's rage upon discovering that his daughter had been wronged. He accused her of trying to cover up the perpetrator's tracks. As if she were some accessory to the crime, she chuckled darkly as she splashed her face with water.
Her father had gone ballistic. Smashed childhood portraits on display. Overturned furniture. Punched holes in walls. He hollered at Miako when she came to Tama's defense (like most mothers do). Ken had embarked on an epic, four hour-long tirade to make sure his daughter understood what all of this meant on the macro-level, what it meant about respectability, honor, damages, and served as proof that she was just like her stupid grandfather. That Sato would pay. That Kakashi would hear of this. Not at any point had Ken stopped to ask if she was alright, or lend any type of emotional support. He'd never been good at those things anyway.
So time with her team and taking missions had been a godsend, getting her away from Ken whenever possible. Tama felt guilty that her mother was often at home, dealing with the worst of Ken's tantrums. 'She's done nothing to deserve that…and I know Mom actually cares about how I feel.' She shut the tap off and blotted her face with a towel, 'All of this has been too much…and I don't want to think about…what Sato might do.'
As she had explained through gritted teeth to Ino during their last conversation: 'This painful time would be so much easier to navigate if no one else was involved or talking about it. Didn't you even think about that, Ino? How this might come back to hurt me again?' Trembling and tears had ensued, and Tama could only take pity on the remorseful blonde kunoichi as she apologized.
Kakashi's home was slightly less conspicuous when Tama exited the bathroom, only able to afford Tenzo a parting wave as she walked out of the house. Her Sensei gave a weary look to Tenzo before following.
The day was a blur and eventually, after spending time with his students and confirming with Asuma, yes, Sato had safely left the village with Kurenai, Hinata, and Shino on a mission, Kakashi was wiped out. He sat at a solitary picnic table, chin propped up in his palm while indulging on a skewered, grilled saury. He chewed the fish and relished the sunset. He was too high-strung. He'd only just started to calm down.
'I have to walk the dogs.'
A bite of his snack.
'Huh. Tenzo probably already walked them. And fed them.'
Dipping the fish in a sauce cup.
'Maybe he shopped and cooked too? No. I don't deserve that treatment after what I put him through today. Tenzo must think I'm insane. Of course clearing out Sato's flat isn't going to make much of a difference…but he did it with me anyway.' Kakashi slumped sideways, splaying over the picnic table as he continued to eat, 'It just feels like that day with Dad all over again. I can barely think straight. If Sato dies, then what? Do I retire? Set up a charity? Should I join a monastery? A cabaret? I'd want to quit everything and give up.'
"Kakashi." A somber voice addressed him.
Kakashi raised his head and saw Gai standing at the table's opposite end. He chewed and swallowed another bite before addressing his friend, "Gai…I wanted to talk to you."
"I know. I apologize for not reaching you sooner. I've had to…" Gai trailed off.
"Deal with your brother." Kakashi imagined.
Gai nodded and took a seat with a heavy sigh.
"I'm sorry." Kakashi started there, "Can we still be friends?"
"Why would you ever say such a foolish thing! As if our friendship were contingent upon on the lives and actions of others…"
"Well, maybe it is? I could've stepped in more to stop my nephew from making dumb mistakes."
Gai shook his head, "There's no use in dwelling on what's done."
"You're right." Kakashi took another bite of fish.
"I wish things had not turned out this way, however…" Gai plopped his chin into the cradle of his hands, resting his elbows in a triangle shape on the tabletop, "I am far more concerned about the well-being of Tama-chan and Sato-kun. The attention and negativity centered on them is truly outrageous. Tama-chan assured me she did not start those rumors…"
"Someone else did." Kakashi acknowledged, pulling his mask back up and dropping the empty skewer in a tray.
"Terrible." Gai clucked his tongue.
"So, did Ken try to do anything?" Kakashi went to the hot-button subject, "He must know."
It took Gai a few moments to fortify himself, staring into space as he recalled the last few days of pandemonium and trying (and failing) to mitigate most of Ken's punitive reactions to Sato's pre-Tournament fling. He said, "Every person close to my brother is enduring his wrath right now."
Kakashi was inquisitive, "Everyone? As in, his wife and daughter too?"
"Oh yes. He has not been gentle or considerate of them at all. My father would roll in his grave if he saw Ken treat his family so poorly." Gai confirmed, "I am accustomed to Ken's outbursts, though…he has been in rare form. To think someone so concerned with honor would behave so dishonorably…"
Gai shut his eyes for a long moment before going on, "I intercepted him on numerous sabotage attempts. He went to the payroll office to demand a freeze of Sato's wages, then to branch tellers to try to close any accounts Sato had. When he was denied there, he filed formal complaints at the civil disputes office, which I counter-appealed. I stopped him from harassing the Hokage as well. He has since contacted every retailer, sales professional, legal counsel and realtor in the village he is connected with…demanding they provide no services to Sato."
Wide-eyed, Kakashi listened to the account of full-throttle treachery Ken wanted to enact.
"An attorney from the legal office did present a legitimate civil action complaint that Ken filed, demanding restitution for all expenses of Sato's that the Maito family covered over the last nine years."
"What? Ken was keeping track of all that?"
"Kakashi, he's an accountant." Gai reminded him.
Distressed, Kakashi held his forehead and dared ask, "How much money was he asking for?"
"530,000 Ryo." Gai recalled, "That included betrothal and miscellaneous expenses, as repayment for damages."
Before Kakashi could try to do mental calculations to figure how long it would take to get that kind of money, or take on a shitty loan to cover it, Gai allayed his concerns.
"I paid it in full." Gai told him.
"You can't be serious."
"I felt terrible." Gai admitted, "I just cannot stand the idea of there being any bad blood between our families. And that burden was one my brother manufactured specifically to make you and Sato suffer."
"I'll have Sato pay you back right away. It was his name in those court documents, not yours, Gai."
He shook his head again, "There's no need to rush, Kakashi. I am sure Sato has enough on his mind now, apart from the monetary demands Ken might make. So far my brother has not asked for or done anything else, to my knowledge."
"Pardon my language, Gai, but your brother is a fucking creep." Kakashi announced, rising up to sit tall and stab the snack skewer vertically into the wood of the table.
"I know." Gai agreed, "But he is my brother."
Kakashi sighed, "We'll get that money back to you, I promise. I never wanted this to be hard on you either…"
"Nothing in the world is perfect." Gai acknowledged as he folded his arms, "Disappointments and obstacles have not stopped me. I could never be like Ken. Moving forward and maintaining bonds is something I must do."
"I will too."
"I have not seen Sato-kun since any of this happened. Is he alright?"
"…I can't say that he is. I'm trying to keep an eye on him and make sure he reports to Jounin Council meetings. It's a bit of a rough crowd there. Genma and Ebisu were giving him a hard time."
"I shall speak to them."
"Thanks, Gai."
"And you, Kakashi? Are you alright?" Gai was as thoughtful as ever.
"I…" He pooched his mouth and thought on it, "I think I am. I was a bit manic today, worrying over Sato…but I'm about through it. I've almost gotten my strength back since being discharged from the hospital."
"Good, good…"
Gai mentioned he had seen two young dogs running around with Kakashi's pack and, ah, yes, they'd have to be introduced! That was something worth celebrating, at least.
Afterward, Gai bade his friend "Until tomorrow…" and set out for home. As the sky darkened, Kakashi also made his way back through the ward. How strange it was to think on the days when he'd been younger, and refused Gai's extensions of friendship time after time. Back then, he never could have imagined having someone so kind and principled to call a friend. Today was a day to count his blessings, Kakashi thought to himself.
At home, he discovered his dogs snoozing peacefully in various spots throughout the house, each fed and cared for. In addition to that, Tenzo was napping on the couch with Pakkun curled up on his stomach.
This was different. Usually, coming home in the evenings did not feel serene or half so crowded. The chaos of the dining table where Sato's repossessed household items accumulated had been quelled, cleaned. Kakashi puttered around briefly before crossing to the sofa, and lifted Pakkun like a bowling ball to relocate the dog to an unoccupied cushion on the floor. The pug hardly even stirred. Then, Kakashi scooched his bottom onto the free space of the couch, and tapped a tune along Tenzo's brows to wake him.
"Buh…oh…Kakashi." He yawned and rubbed his face.
"Thanks for taking care of everything."
"It's, uh…no problem." Tenzo wrestled back his awakened faculties, "I could tell you needed help today. You had an irrational freak-out."
"I did."
"And your nephew?"
"Safe, I'm told. He's on a mission with his team now."
"That should keep him out of trouble, then."
"No accidents or unacceptable chewing?" Kakashi wondered of Tolsi and Gattsu.
"Nah, they behaved. I think they're going to need more toys, though."
He looked fondly over at the sleeping bundles of fluff tucked against Bull on the floor.
"I know that you can't help worrying like you did today…but try not to let it take control of you. I don't think Sato wants to leave you alone." Tenzo shared some insight, "This isn't quite like your Dad…at least I don't think so. Your nephew has you and his team and other forms of support. He can pull through."
"I don't want to have a Panglossian outlook just yet. He's not out of the woods, so I won't let my guard down."
"Fair enough, but try not to steal anything else out of his flat. Okay?"
"I can do that." Kakashi found an errant thread on the seam of Tenzo's sweater. He plucked it off.
Tenzo wore a contemplative look, "…can I ask you something?"
"Ask away."
"This is going way back. Back to when you'd just retired from ANBU."
"Hm, quite a while ago." Kakashi could reminisce a bit.
"I was starting to move up in rank, remember? We trained a lot then. I didn't have a lot of friends in those days, so I tried to go to all of those team-building nights and stupid outings."
"Yes. Do they still hold those? Sai should go to them."
"Not as often, but I've brought him a few times." Tenzo digressed, "Anyway, you went to functions like that too."
"As I was steadily growing more sociable then, yes, I did. That was when I hung around more with Gai and Asuma."
Tenzo was nodding, "That was the time. You actually showed up at Obon."
Kakashi thought back to that summer festival long, long ago, "Oh yeah, I did."
"You never used to go, you said. But I hadn't been to it either even after getting out of Root, so you said you'd check it out with me."
"Ah, right."
"It was great. Then you went to some of the team-building events."
"Mm-hmm." He wasn't exactly sure, but that sounded like something he might've done then.
"The bar in Nabezo was pretty popular for get-togethers."
"That's a great place." Kakashi was amused by memories that drifted back, and then he slowly remembered something unpleasant, "Ah. Is that what you want to talk about? All of this context…"
"Well, it's not like it was ever discussed. Years went by." Tenzo sniffed.
"I thought I was in the way." Kakashi said simply.
Tenzo seemed absolutely flabbergasted by the comment and sat up, jostling Kakashi in the process, "You thought you were in the way?"
"Hm. That's…what I thought at the time." Kakashi explained, "People were getting to know you, so when you had attention—"
"Like I cared about that-!" Tenzo was expressive with his hand gestures, "Kakashi, we were together every day! Almost every night! What happened? What was unclear?" His nostrils flared, "I told you how I felt."
"Try to understand I took everything that everyone said back then with a grain of salt." Kakashi reminded him, shifting to lean back into tufted cushions, "You were still young and learning how to participate in those social circles. I didn't want to hold you back."
"I was with you by choice. You weren't holding me back."
"After all that chatter at those dumb parties they made it sound like I was a thief. Like you didn't stand a chance…"
Tenzo tossed his hands up again, "They were all drunk, chain-smoking idiots who could barely stay upright in chairs and you listened to them?"
Kakashi admitted, "I didn't want to, but I couldn't ignore what was said. As I recall, one particular night you had that Intel Corps girl, Suniti, all over you. I wasn't going to make a scene or start a bar fight. I thought it was fair to let you try what you wanted to, back then. I didn't interfere."
"Try—?" Tenzo held his head, "I wish you had interfered, Kakashi. That woman was a mess."
"But she was…" Feebly, Kakashi pointed to spots on his friend's face, indicating where the Intel Corps clerk girl had planted wet ones on Tenzo. At the time (and his memory was shoddy) it had looked like a standard fling that began in a bar between consenting, boozy parties.
"That was harassment!" Tenzo clarified for him in a shriek, "It was a nightmare trying to get that drunkard off of me, and you couldn't tell? That I needed backup? You thought that was something I'd go for?"
"I…uh…didn't want to rule out the possibility and rudely interrupt."
"I'm gay." Tenzo was visibly frustrated, "Surely you had figured that out? It took that sloppy clerk most of the night to understand! And you just left me there!"
"Oh. I didn't know you had it completely worked out at that point—"
"You really can be stupid, Kakashi." Crossing his arms and shaking his head, Tenzo added, "Yes, it took some time for me to understand. Leaving Root and entering ANBU made me question plenty of things, so when I finally realized that you weren't just a mentor or role-model to me, I actively tried to spend more time with you. I tried to find ways to reach you."
"Hm." Kakashi sat back in silence and reflected on the matter. If he were truly honest, he'd known how Tenzo felt even then. But the slightest possibility of Tenzo's wavering interest in him (which in fact was not disinterest at all) had squirreled him into retreat, as Kakashi was wont to do with most delicate things.
He hardly ever committed to anything or anyone in his personal life. Not because he didn't care, but because the act of and consequences of caring scared him witless. Then it seemed his chance with his subordinate-turned-something-else had come and gone. Yet that chance had not in fact expired. It'd been put on hold for several years.
"I know it's not the same for you." Tenzo granted in a softer voice, "Things aren't so defined for you. How you feel— if it's love or amusement. If it's a man or a woman. Whatever it happened to be, you never stuck with it. So I knew I was gambling when I got my hopes up." He caved tiredly and let his head sink into the backrest, "I couldn't take it personally. If friendship was all you wanted, I was never going to resent that. I was grateful."
Kakashi's long, chicken-headed silence did not give much direction. His eyes slid over each of his snoring dogs, then to the dimly lit street lamp beyond the window. His gaze settled on Tenzo, who had begun to crack under the weight of anxious embarrassment. The lack of a prompt answer from Kakashi erased his last shreds of confidence.
"Now that that's out of the way…" Tenzo cleared his throat, "I've had enough excitement for today. I should go home." He pushed off of the sofa and was a skittish mess all the way across the room, then fumbled in the genkan for footwear.
"You're just going to leave it on that note?" Kakashi was perplexed.
"I…yes." He was nodding while doing an awkward shoe dance.
"Really?"
"I don't think what I said was particularly damaging." Tenzo mumbled, "Just let it be clarification since you…clearly misunderstood what things were like back then." He added that there were now eggs, milk, and yogurt in the refrigerator. He'd gotten a few kilos of rice too, which had been running low. And also, "I'll see you…tomorrow."
Kakashi had moved to the refrigerator to investigate the new perishables, "Don't you want to hear what I have to say before you go?"
Tenzo was hesitating at the door, "I'm not sure."
"Come on, it's not so bad. Did you eat? I'm going to make omurice."
It wasn't as if a deeply appealing dish had been offered, nor much reassurance on Kakashi's part, but after 30 seconds of agonizing, Tenzo took a seat at the island counter to watch the food preparations. The rice cooker was going. While chopping an onion, Kakashi told him, "You should get a full disclaimer."
"Disclaimer?"
"So that you don't misunderstand me, since you're concerned about misunderstandings..." Kakashi began, "I do not think I am a wise choice of companion."
Before Tenzo could say anything to disagree, Kakashi made a waggling motion with a chef's knife, "Hold on. That was my honest opinion. You know better than anyone what I'm like. And it's not the Copy Ninja of myth or stereotypes that abound, not a hero or gentleman, well, not exactly. While I can dedicate myself as a shinobi, that isn't the case in the other aspects of my life."
"Kakashi—"
"I'm a bit of a fuck-up." Kakashi admitted.
Tenzo's face fell, sympathizing, "I wouldn't call you that."
"That's because you're nice. But really, you've seen first-hand that there have been things I can't handle on a personal level. I don't like people very much. Getting close to them is…" He shuddered, "I'll always think about what it's like to lose the ones I cherish. It sours the feeling."
"Then is it worth not building new bonds at all?"
"I've had time to think about that and, no, it's not worth it. That doesn't mean I find it easy, trying to get close to others. It took a long time for me to truly appreciate my students." Kakashi confessed, "It took even longer to genuinely care about my generational peers, who've always stuck by me. You've been the easiest person to get close to."
A bit too frazzled to smile at the admission, Tenzo sputtered and took over chopping the onions when Kakashi pushed the cutting board in front of him. Kakashi then went about cubing chicken breasts with a different knife.
"But you can't look at these improvements and good qualities in me without also looking at the bad." Kakashi cautioned him, "I didn't do much of anything when I saw my Dad in pain. Then he killed himself, so I decided to become a law-bound prig who treated people like shit. Obito died because of me. When Rin told me that she loved me, and I didn't feel the same way, I was very careless in my treatment of her. Once Minato-sensei was gone, I didn't do nearly as much as I could have to look out for his child. I fought with and belittled my sister pretty much all of our lives, abandoned her kid when she died…" He concluded with, "My track record is…eh…"
"It's not the best track record." Tenzo allowed.
"I also read a lot of porn."
"Well, that was never a secret."
With the chicken chopped, Kakashi added oil to a pan to heat on the stove, "There are plenty of things that scare me. For some reason, everyone around here seems to think I'm an unstoppably courageous caricature. At least friends know I can be an asshat and a flake."
Genuine laughter erupted from Tenzo, "This…is the most self-aware you've ever been…maybe…"
"Do you see those things in me?" Kakashi wondered.
A small nod. Kakashi sighed and turned to add onions to the pan, stirring lazily.
"Kakashi…"
He glanced over his shoulder to Tenzo.
"I see much more than that in you." Tenzo told him with a straight face.
Kakashi turned back to cooking, "Thank you." He added the chicken to the pan, "Just imagine: if you hadn't been commanded to kill me while you were still with Root, we never would have become friends."
"I guess not. I would probably be dead by now." Tenzo smiled ruefully, "Danzo had me on assignments until I would collapse."
"And he never let you have a haircut." Kakashi recalled.
"What? You didn't like my glorious, waist-length hair?"
"Of course I did. Every hairstyle you tried suited you, I noticed."
Aghast, "I…think you're complimenting me."
"Jeez, relax." Kakashi clucked as he added rice to the final mixture, "Get me some eggs."
Tenzo did as he was asked and procured the carton for his culinary host. Beaten eggs were poured into a second pan, spread wide to provide an omelet base. Judging by the speed and dexterity with which the meal was prepared, Tenzo figured that Kakashi ate this dish pretty often. The delicious aroma had woken a few of the dogs, who were lollygagging opportunistically.
When the rice filling was stuffed into the omelet shells and patted into the traditional shape, Kakashi even went through the trouble of designing a ketchup face on the finished product. He handed the plate off to Tenzo, "Here."
"Oh, uh…what did you draw on it?" Tenzo took a seat at the table.
"It's your face."
"I don't look like this!"
"You do. See? Those lines are the under-eye bags. I thought it was pretty good."
Tenzo aggressively tore apart the omelet mound with a spoon, annoyed, "My eyes are not that bad…"
"Hey, aren't you going to thank me for the meal?" Kakashi also sat down with his plate.
"No. I didn't even want to stay here. I poured my heart out unnecessarily and now I'm embarrassed." Tenzo took a bite, "And you just go on and on with the self-deprecation."
"Ah. You're welcome anyway." Kakashi was smiling as he pulled his neck gaiter down to eat.
"What sauce did you use in the rice?"
"Barbecue sauce."
"It's strange but good."
"I'm glad. I was eating saury earlier, but that wasn't quite enough." Kakashi shooed his dogs away with a foot, citing the fact that they had all been fed. He chewed merrily while they watched.
"Thank you for the meal." Tenzo muttered belatedly.
"Hmm." Kakashi was studying his face from across the table.
Tenzo was trying to eat in peace, maybe even preserve some of his dignity in light of the fact that Kakashi sort of held him hostage (by way of food). He'd much rather be across town in his sad shoebox of a home, curled up beneath a blanket and regretting that he'd bared his heart like plated omurice.
It had been stupid to say anything. He'd been thinking back to some five or six years ago, when they'd been younger and less jaded. He'd thought of those times when Kakashi had kissed him; that perhaps he hadn't read into it too much. That it wasn't just some initiation for Tenzo as he got a foothold in social circles— maybe Kakashi had meant it? But when years had gone by and nothing had blossomed, those memories diluted and the motivations seemed more uncertain than ever.
Moping while he ate, Tenzo cleared his plate and tried not to collapse forward onto it and die of shame. Why did he always try so hard? It'd become a joke to some of their friends. Tenzo knew that his devotion was pretty easy to spot.
"Stop acting so put-upon." Kakashi chided him, "I had to give a disclaimer."
"By saying all those awful things about yourself? Why do I need a discla—?"
"I love you." Kakashi said.
Beside the table, Biscuit and Gattsu had become energized by some bright change in human mood, circling restlessly, sniffing. From his cushion on the far side of the room, Pakkun was telling his dog compatriots to quit it and give "the two-leggers some space." Tenzo hardly even noticed the doggish behavior peaking in the house. He was staring dumbly.
Kakashi took a final bite of food before confirming, "You are the only person that I want."
"I…I-I…" Tenzo pressed his lips shut, red-faced, startled.
"I still think you could choose better, and I can't guarantee I will get any of this right." Kakashi gathered up the empty dishes, "When have I ever?" He transported them to the sink to clean up.
"You can…I mean…you've done more good than you realize." It was taking some gargantuan emotional strength for Tenzo not to completely lose his cool and clam up, "Especially for me. I have to credit you with most every decent thing in my life. Don't try to…minimize that. I don't want to look elsewhere…"
"I know. I won't." While scrubbing the dishes, Kakashi somehow remained calm and Tenzo was goggling at his level-headedness.
What was he supposed to say? He didn't want to rush serious words and seem desperate or pathetic, even though there was a chance he already did, Tenzo considered. His head was fuzzy. Palms a bit clammy. Why was it that knowing someone loved him changed everything at a molecular level? He would have to renegotiate everything; breathing, sleeping, laundry, his life's purpose. He needed a glass of water. He needed to roll up like a pangolin and take a few minutes. Did Kakashi really feel unruffled while acknowledging something that had taken years to manifest? How did he do it?
This was no flirtatious crush of his bygone late teen years and early twenties. His feelings were accepted and returned. What did other people do in this situation? Tenzo wondered. Did they bellow victoriously, stutter like fools, or cry in silence? What was standard procedure? He had no personal experience or references to go off of.
At some point during his contemplation, Kakashi's dishwashing wrapped up and he moved around the edge of the counter. Tenzo had to snap out of the mental survey his brain was conducting. Kakashi was aspectant to him, not a half step away. His face was still uncovered, expressing that he was waiting for some kind of confirmation from Tenzo.
"Eh-hem." Tenzo cleared his throat again, "Sorry…I'm…a bit overwhelmed."
"Looks like it."
"…did you really mean all that?"
Kakashi assured him, "The only time I fib is when I'm making up excuses for tardiness."
"Oh."
"So, be clear about what you want. You're the one who brought up this subject, but I expect you hoped to gain something from it."
"I don't know. I don't know…what needs to change. From the way things are now." Tenzo admitted, breathing sporadically as he noticed the shrinking barrier of air and space between them, "I haven't done this before. Maybe you've dated someone, so you should lead, or…"
A flat response, "What do you think I know about dating?"
"I…er—" Tenzo watched one of Kakashi's hands reach, settling on the back of his neck.
With regards to being in a functional relationship with another adult, Kakashi wagered he knew "Close to nothing." And he optimistically added, "That won't stop me from figuring it out, though."
Tenzo managed short breaths, "Me too..." The world was a dizzy place.
Tenzo suspected the dogs were observing, naively detached from the spectacle of Hatake Kakashi leaning forward and winding his arms around the fidgety dinner guest. By their standards it was not unusual or unexpected. Nor did they think much about the two meeting lips, a slow act of remembrance and reacquaintance. Eventually, the dog pack settled down again since the opportunity for dinner scraps had passed, and the humans were plenty distracted with loving pecks.
Night trawled a veil to darken the home where no lamps had been lit. Kakashi noted that he was overdue for sleep and had a check-up scheduled for the morning to assess the reinstatement of his mission activity.
Goodnight was the idea. And it still was the idea when Tenzo lingered, caught up in his try-hard franticness and disbelief that he could solicit kisses when he wanted. He could stay. He could speak his mind. He could feel. Kakashi did discourage him from "Writing any more of those mushy sentiment cards," though, "People are nosy and try to read them."
"So what?" Tenzo lived for such things.
"Those words are for me, not them."
"True…" Tenzo yawned as he curled up on the side of a bed he hadn't seen in a long time. It was good to know the hold of another again. The hold of the only other. To know it and not have to forget.
The next morning felt surer than all the days before it.
And napkin spread by fays;
Drifting meadow of the air,
Where bloom the daisied banks and violets,
And in whose fenny labyrinth
The bittern booms and heron wades;
Spirit of lakes and seas and rivers,—
Bear only perfumes and the scent
Of healing herbs to just men's fields.
—H. D. Thoreau
Note: Thanks for reading and happy Pride Month. : )
Chapter 54: United Front
