Ch 49- Becky Lass, Part II

Elsie was never gladder that Charlie had come with them, as she was when they arrived at the home where Becky resided. She found herself apprehensive about this meeting, and so did Charlotte once it had all been explained to her. The little girl clutched her father's hand, clinging to him like a girl of much younger years, and sucked her thumb as they walked. Charlotte was known for being brave; but would be anything but, today.

Charlie, meanwhile felt the need to be brave for his mum's sake. He took her hand and walked with her ahead of the rest of the family. Anywhere she needed to go, he would be, the measure of moral fortitude. Samuel rested patiently on his mother's hip, and Lucy napped peacefully, tucked in a little basket her father toted around with ease, her teenie eyes sealed shut.

"Charlotte m'lass there's no reason to be afraid." Carson assured.

He bent down, as his wife checked in at the visitor's desk, and pulled his daughter's fingers from her mouth.

"Mummy and daddy would never put you in a situation that was dangerous, you know that don't you?" He asked; she nodded. "It's just mummy's baby sister."

Charlotte looked down at tiny Lucy, who slept soundly without a care, considering her father's words and finding it odd that anyone could ever find her own baby sister threatening. Maybe Aunt Becky would be something like Lucy.

"Daddy has his girls, Charlotte: it will be alright." Carson whispered, kissing her forehead and taking her hand once again.

Carson wouldn't admit it, but he was a little bit concerned, himself. Not about Becky, but the other people who lived here. Sometimes there were outbursts, and he didn't want the children around such things; they were far too small.

"Daddy…" Charlotte whispered so quietly he couldn't hear her.

She looked around in amazement as they walked into a large room lined from floor to ceiling with big, white, paned windows, the sun shining brightly into the room. Dozens of people of all ages sat around, playing board games.

"Mummy, the games look fun." Charlie said.

Elsie couldn't help but giggle, her sweet little boy giving her strength.

"Yes m'lad, they do."

Sam watched carefully noting all the sweets in the room, his mouth watering.

"Where's Auntie, Mummy?" Charlie urged gently.

Elsie didn't answer, only absentmindedly running her fingers through her son's hair as she surveyed the room. Suddenly an auburn haired woman caught Elsie's eye. The woman, who looked much younger than Charlie might have expected, noticed Elsie in an instant. Her dull blue eyes brightened quickly and she jumped up from her chair, almost rushing toward the Carsons. Charlotte grabbed her father's pants leg, clutching the fabric, hiding behind him.

"There she is m'lad." Elsie smiled.

…..

Moments later, the Carson's sat around the table with Becky. Charlotte sat on her father's lap, three month old, Lucy in the crook of his other arm. Despite the huge age difference between them, both girls were nervous for vastly different reasons and stared back at their aunt and everything around them. Lucy, in particular, searched her new surroundings with wide brown eyes, full of fear. Charlotte found her tummy ached, and that the closer nearer she was to her da, the better she felt.

"It's alright." Carson promised again, whispering to Charlotte, "Daddy has got his girls." He rocked Lucy calmly, keeping her from crying.

The boys on the other hand, were more engaged. Charlie had bravely taken a liking to his Aunt Becky and had begun to talk with her and make her laugh, although even he could see, as his mother had said, that she was somehow more his age than hers.

"I'm so sorry Becky lass, that I've not been here, but as you can see, I've had my hands full. You know these are the twins, Charlie and Charlotte and they've gotten so, so big! And these are my little lad and lass, who you've not met: Samuel and Lucy. "

Lucy looked both ways, hearing her name. Her father took her little hand and with her whole fist, she squeezed his finger. Sam didn't pay attention to his aunt, his focus solely on the cookie before him. He broke it in half, eagerly shoving part in his mouth.

"Elsie I'm so happy you're here!" Becky cried.

"And my lass, I'm so sorry I've not been. We do have some things to talk to you about."

"Cook-ie!" Sam burst, staring down at the cookie as he dropped it.

Elsie looked down in surprise, Carson laughed and Becky clapped.

"Samuel my love, its your third word! Mummy's so proud!" Elsie kissed his cheek.

Sam didn't pay attention to his mother's praise and instead, reached for another cookie in the middle of the table.

"That's right: cookie." Becky said slowly, smiling at Elsie as she handed Sam another cookie. The little boy squealed, smiling up at his aunt. In that moment, he decided he liked her.

"Becky lass." Elsie began as her sister suddenly turned her focus from the family to the puzzle before them. "Elsie lass, I know you like it here."

"Yes. It's home!" She smiled simply, without looking up. "Ever since mama…. since mama…" She paused sadly, beginning to sniffle. Elsie reached out and took her baby sister's hand.

"Yes lass…. Since mama." Elsie paused a moment. "I don't know if they told you: the home is shutting down."

Becky looked up in a panic at her sister's words. "NO!"

"Becky lass… Charlie and I have found a new place for you, much closer to us at Downton… I know we haven't been around much…"

"And for that we're sorry." Charlie said.

"Yeah we're real sorry." Charlotte added shyly, biting on her thumbnail.

Becky didn't react, her growing discontent obvious by her expression.

"But my Becky lass, it'll mean we'll get to see you much more." Elsie added.

"And one of the nurses told us, many of your friends are going to the one we're thinking of." Carson said.

"No! No, no, no, no, NO!" Becky cried, startling the twins tremendously. Charlotte turned around burying her face in her father's shoulder as her aunt started to cry.

"Becky, Becky I'm sorry m'love." Elsie said sadly, forcibly taking her sister's hands. "But there's nothing we can do… we don't want this any more than you do, but we promise we'll help you adjust… more than when you came here. We promise we won't leave you alone… I'd no other choice before and I'm so sorry."

"R-really…. So Becky won't be alone?" She asked, uncertain.

"No." Elsie promised. "No I promise you'll never be alone again, my Becky lass."

"Cook-ie!" Sam laughed, handing his now slobber covered cookie to his aunt.

"Cook-ie?" Sam asked.

Charlotte was still nervous, but a bit more at ease when they prepared to leave. She watched from a distance as her mother hugged her sister, cradling her in her arms. Their father had taken them out into the home's gardens so the two sisters could talk privately: Elsie had a lot to say. Carson held Lucy in his arms and followed Sam closely as he toddled about.

Meanwhile, Charlie was worried about Charlotte, her behavior seeming unnatural. He came to his twin's side, taking her hand and squeezing it. The little boy was too young to realize he knew his sister better than anyone else, having shared womb with her (even there she'd not been this shy), and spent almost every moment of his six years by her side.

"Charlotte, why are you scared? When you're always a bit braver than me." He hated to admit.

Charlotte shrugged as she watched her mother and aunt, not really sure. She was always so brave, so sure, and always up to help others… but something about her aunt's place in life made her feel venerable in a way she was not comfortable with. Deep down, she wondered if she'd always have to care for Lucy, in the way her mother cared for Becky. Charlotte didn't realize that one day, she'd be her aunt's savior.

"I'm so sorry, Becky lass. I've been a terrible big sister to you." Elsie whispered, kissing her sister's hair, cradling.

Becky sank into the hug, holding on to Elsie tight. Inside, she was so relieved her sister was there: that she wasn't alone and afraid, just for those few hours. To Becky, Elsie was like something of a dream, of a loving home and a life long past.

She whispered back, playing with her big sister's hair in a very childlike way. "I know I'm a problem."

"NO. No." Elsie said quickly. "Never, it's I who's been inadequate for you. You're a gift to me, Becky lass."

"No more Becky alone?" She whispered, still not believing what she'd heard before.

"No. No more Becky alone." Elsie promised.

Six Hours Later

Carson raised an eyebrow, wondering how they were going to do this.

"Daddy." Charlie tugged on his father's pant leg.

The energy in the hotel room was frenetic. Neither Carson nor Elsie had spent a night in a hotel in many years, since the twins were conceived, in fact. Both were used to spending quite a different type of night when they were in a hotel together, their outing always turning into something of a tryst. But four babies later, Carson found it was going to be the ultimate of family nights. That was, they were to sleep five to a bed.

Carson's eyebrow remained poised high above its usual place, staring back at the bed which was just a bit smaller than the one they shared at home, wondering how they'd fit three of their four children in with them.

"Samuel, no splashing!" He heard Elsie call.

"I get my own bath because I'm a lady." Charlotte reminded.

"You're not either!" Charlie corrected, struggling to keep his towel wrapped around him.

"Hush son, it's bedtime." Carson soothed, rubbing a towel on his son's hair in an effort to dry it.

"Daddy will you tell us stories about what you and mummy did when you used to come to hotels?" Charlie asked this, having been told they used to travel before they had a family.

Carson understood the innocence behind the inquiry, but choked on his son's question nonetheless. He sighed, struggling with what to say. It was difficult, even knowing that the boy simply liked adventure. But this was one adventure he was not yet ready to explain.

"You know mummy and I had to hide our marriage." He began.

Charlotte sighed. "Because Lord Grantham used to be less understanding."

"What?" Elsie laughed, bringing Sam out of the bathroom.

"I was simply reminding the twins that we once had to hide our marriage.

Carson paused, staring back at his wife lovingly, his heart over whelmed with gratitude to be in this place with her: in a hotel room, with his love and four little people of their making stuck sleeping in one bed.

"And I asked daddy what you used to do when you went to hotels." Charlie explained innocently. "You would've been bored without us."

Elsie burst into giggles, noting the mortified look on her husband's face. She kissed his cheek, laying Samuel down on the bed. "Well Mr. Carson, what was it you and I used to do?" She pried, egging him on.

"I…" He was stunned she'd say this. "We would come on vacation and have fun together … and let everyone know we were married…"

May 1914

Neither Carson could believe they'd managed to hide their marriage for seventeen long years. It'd been a long, painful time of restraint: the best of times, the most trying of times. Elsie secretly pined for the day when her husband would let his guard down and announce their marriage. They'd planned on telling everyone as soon as the baby started to show. Elsie's heart was heavy on the subject of children, she didn't know, after so many years, and what seemed to be a failed surgery, if she'd ever conceive… but either way she was more than ready to live life as a married woman.

Meanwhile, Carson secretly wondered when his wife's baby madness would end. He wouldn't say it to her, but he figured that there was no hope. After all, it'd been seventeen years, and not one pregnancy, not even a lost one. He didn't know that his wife was still praying and hoping for a miracle, following surgery not too long before, that he was unaware of.

But on that particular weekend, both did their best to put their perspective worries out of mind. He would not think of her obsession, she would not think of her pain and for certain: neither would think twice about children. Instead, the two were consumed with one another. Neither knew what it was, but something that weekend had amped their desire for each other, it was like it was in the air almost, and whatever it was, the two followed its lead to the tee.

Carson moaned into his wife's mouth, kissing her deeply as he moved down her cheek and jaw and to her neck. She moaned loudly, digging her heals into the bed.

"Charlie…" She cried, biting her lip, clutching the sheets beneath.

"Elsie." He whispered, loving it when she said his name.

"OOOH."

It was one of the things that made having a secret marriage so inconvenient: they had to work hard to quiet each other when they made love at Downton, because one always went to the other in secret.

"Charlie, Charlie, Charlie!" She moaned.

"HEY quiet down in there!" Elsie and Charlie jumped out of embarrassment, shocked when they felt someone hit their door.

Having lost the moment, the two stared at each other for a split second before bursting into flustered, embarrassed giggles, both secretly proud they'd drawn attention. She smiled deeply grabbing his cheeks and kissing him sweetly.

That, of course, transpired eight months before two rambunxious, premature twins came on the scene. In hindsight, Carson found the incident fitting, the two children called the world to attention in everything they did, in birth and in life… why not conception as well.

"Charlie." Elsie giggled, pulling Samuel's shirt over his head. "The answer is simply that mummy and daddy would go on vacation to steal time alone."

"How are we going to do this Mrs. Hughes?" Carson changed the subject; trying not to think about the many nights he'd spent alone with his wife in hotels.

"Well, Lucy lass, is in her basket, fast asleep." Elsie considered. "Charlie and Charlotte can sleep in between mummy and daddy and Sam can sleep on daddy's chest."

"Very well then. It'll be a bit cozy but that's alright." He said, taking his youngest boy in his arms.

The family settled in, Elsie tucking in each child as Carson turned off the light. He sighed as he climbed into bed, closing his eyes and Elsie kissed his cheek. Sam closed his eyes, excited that he got to sleep on his father's chest, to him, no place in the world could be more comforting.

"Thank you for doing so much on such a long day." Elsie whispered, kissing her husband's nose. "I love you Charlie. Charlie, Charlie, Charlie." She giggled, teasing him.

"Mummy, why you say Charlie four times?" Charlotte asked, yawning as she cuddled into her mother's side.

"Shuuu my love." She shushed. "Good night lass."

Carson smiled deeply, thinking back on that night. Everything he'd feared they'd never have, and everything he valued about life its self was right there in their arms. Soothed to the depth of his soul, he leaned his head against his wife's and drifted off to sleep.

"Lucy lass." Elsie soothed, yawning. "It's four o'clock in the morning. You must be famished to wake mummy like this." She pat the tiny baby's thigh tenderly.

"Elsie?" Carson asked, coming onto the balcony where she sat, nursing the baby.

Elsie smiled up at him, her hair moving softly in the gentle breeze. "Good morning my love."

"It's very early." He pointed out.

"Your baby lass, was hungry, er … famished." Elsie giggled, beaming down at the baby as she suckled fast. She bit her lip, happy to rock her last little treasure.

Carson smiled and came and sat with his wife. "She's starting to get to be sleepy lass." He observed, brushing the baby's cheek tenderly as she ate, his smile full of awe. "Lucy. I think you're taking advantage of mummy's generosity."

"No! It's mummy's job to feed her … whenever she wants. And cuddle her as often as she needs." Elsie bit her lip, smiling back at him.

For a moment it was unspoken: no words were needed. They'd done it, the aim of every night they'd spent in secret, in far away hotels and dusty servants quarters, realized in a lovely babe, who suckled in her mother's arms, and three little ones who snored like chimneys in the background.

Carson chuckled, playing with Lucy's nearly blonde, reddish hair. He was beyond grateful for Lucy, as the youngest, she awed him, and he was still reeling from her traumatic birth, an event, which he realized could've cost him his Elsie.

"She's a beautiful, beautiful baby." He whispered. "It's tremendous you know. We used to come to these hotels and have such a spectacularly splendid time. And now to come back with four wee ones… four: it's such a wonder, my Elsie. You're a wonder." He said, sweetly placing his nose against hers.

She sighed, closing her eyes, resting her nose against his. "Oh Charlie, Charlie, Charlie, Charlie…"