Thank you for your reviews! I am sorry the chapter is as late as it is today, but I've been pretty busy. So, thank you for all of those who are reviewing, please keep them coming. They're motivating as ever and I am always willing to answer questions about the story, or talk about it with you... well, what I can, that is. ;) Don't want to give away all the secrets. I love you all so much for sticking with me, and I think you'll be pleased with how this chapter ends. Anyway, let's keep the reviews going, shall we? I hope to post again this week, but I can't make promises at the moment. I'll try though, okay? I love you all so much, remember that, okay?

Let me know what you think. Enjoy!


"Oh my Gosh, please calm down, Dez." Ally rolled her eyes where she stood, pretending that she didn't see the young man crouched behind the counter. He gave her a look of despair—which was highly overdone because he had nothing to worry about. He teetered where he was, looking beyond her toward the entrance. She wanted to knock him over and tell him to stop acting like an idiot, but she knew a part of him was still healing and doing so wouldn't be good for his balance.

They were waiting for the loud mouthed Latina that he loved oh-so much. She'd helped him plan this and it would explain why she was sitting next to the very cart that the short girl used to work at, directly across from the recruiting office where he and Austin too had met almost two years ago. The plan was for him to propose there, because it was where he'd fallen in love with her (or so he claimed). She was one to believe in love at first sight, but she believed both sides had to be in it. According to Trish, she wanted to hurt him the moment he opened his mouth.

"I'm scared!" he finally retorted. "What if she doesn't show up?"

"Why wouldn't she show up?" Ally answered, giving him a look of confusion. "She's meeting me."

"Okay, fine." He huffed as he leaned against the counter, still staring into the distance.

Finally, Ally spotted her. She smiled and waved from where she sat, giving her boyfriend a sideways look that said he only had a few minutes left to freak out. She finally made her way to Ally and hugged the girl tightly. From where they stood now, you couldn't see the former soldier. "Are you ready for lunch?" Trish asked. "Sorry I'm late. I was trying to get in contact with Dez before I left before, but he must be somewhere with Casey. I know he mentioned they had plans today! How awesome is that? A couple weeks ago and he was dreading even going to his house with you."

Ally forced a smile, if only she knew. "Oh, I'm glad. They're so much better off as friends."

Rustling could be heard from behind her and she knew it was down to the final few seconds. She tried to remain where she was, but it was definitely a sight that Trish didn't miss regardless. Her gasp alone had the girl turn and smile when Dez started to walk toward her, in full military dress uniform, a wide, proud smile on his face. It'd been a while since he'd been in them, since he was almost officially retired at this point. He finally met her in the middle, still grinning ear to ear. His nerves were there still, his foot tapping as he came to a stop.

"What are you doing here? Why are you wearing that?"

He chuckled, rubbing his neck. "Remember this place?"

"My old job?" she muttered. "Yeah."

"We met here," he reminded her. "Well, I annoyed you here."

"We met here," she agreed, still looking very confused. "You didn't answer my other question."

Dez looked to Ally, who only nodded her head in approval and assurance. She stepped back, turning on the video camera, to which Trish looked like she was ready to start yelling. He finally reached a shaky hand into his pocket, pulling out a tiny box. Another gasp escaped her throat and this time, she finally got the idea. Her eyes welled up and the other girl couldn't help but giggle. It wasn't often you saw his girlfriend so vulnerable and she loved it.

"What are you doing?"

Dez sank down to one knee as a group of people began to crowd. He didn't acknowledge any of them though, kept his eyes on the now also trembling girl. "I met you here almost two years ago, at a crossroads in my life where I was trying to make something of myself. You didn't give me the time of day at first, actually you didn't for a while. I was head over heels though, knew that I couldn't give up. Even back then, I knew I had found the one. After that, I deployed and you waited. I came home, broken and not sure of anything, and you still waited. You stood by me and loved me, you helped me and made it all worth the pain that I had to go through. It was worth it because every time I closed my eyes, when I opened them, you were there. That was what kept me going and I want to do that rest of my life. I want to close my eyes only to open to your smiling face. Can you do that for me, Trish? Will you marry me?"

The crowd was thick, everyone had their eyes on the couple standing in the middle. Trish had tears down her face at that point, her fingers cupped over her mouth. He looked at her with a tilted head, wondering when she was going to answer. A few people shouted to say yes, and even Ally had to join in. She glanced around at her surveyors and couldn't help but laugh. Her head swam it seemed, but her mouth did the talking, "Yes, Dez. Dez, I will marry you."

Letters from Home

"Austin, she said yes!"

He closed his eyes, cherishing the excitement and cheer that was her voice. It'd been a while since he'd heard it, he couldn't help but ignore her calls when he wasn't in the right mind to answer them. Between that they'd been emailing, a safe escape from having to pretend he was alright. There was a façade, the added bonus that she didn't have to hear the deadness to his voice.

"I'm so happy for him," Austin said honestly. If anyone deserved a happy ending, it was Dez. His background hadn't been much better than his. His father was a complete mess, having run the family into so much debt that there would be no way to pay it all back. His mother worked too many jobs to try to counter it and keep afloat. He knew he had left there to escape, to get away from what also would have been a disaster. It was part of the reason they had bonded; they both came from screwed up families that looked so happy on the outside. "I'll call him after we hang up."

"Maybe you'll be his best man," she giggled into the phone. "Actually, of course you will be!"

"That'd be really nice," he admitted. He didn't get to be Casey's best man, considering he'd married his lovely wife when they hadn't been talking. He'd love to be able to do that for the other guy that he cared so much for. "I'm sure you'll be a bridesmaid, and a beautiful one at that."

She was quiet on the line for a moment, "I miss you, Austin."

"I miss you too." He squeezed his eyes shut another time. Her voice, her presence alone kept him okay for days sometimes. He probably should answer her phone calls more often, considering it meant he didn't have to resort to time with Brant, the drinking—the pills, even. He just needed her. Why did she have to be so far away? "It's not long now, only a few weeks." He couldn't wait to get away for a few days, head south to Dez's uncle for a Thanksgiving weekend.

She giggled again, "I made a countdown. I really can't wait to see you. Feels like it's been forever."

"Believe me, I know," he murmured back. "I can't wait to see everyone. How big is Clara now?"

Ally squealed, "Not too big, but oh my Gosh, Austin! She's getting big! She's finding out tomorrow what she's having! You're going to be the best Uncle ever! I can see it now. you excited? You have to be excited. I bet you never even thought you would have a brother! Oh my Gosh. Do you think they'd let you come home for a couple of days to see the baby?"

He couldn't help but smile at her excitement. She was so heavenly and he was straight from hell. "I don't know. It's not my baby, so I don't know if they'd okay it."

"Oh, I hope so! She's due in March." The girl continued to giggle. "Sorry, I sound like I've been drinking, it's just so good to actually hear your voice. I sent out a couple of letters again, sorry they've been a bit far and in between. Classes are picking up, and I've been trying to keep up with my volunteer hours, too. I really like doing it, so I don't want to stop. The diner is back at it's slow period, so it's not bad there. Trish really loves the job, which I never would have thought, but I guess people can be surprising. Did I mention I'm so excited to see Cass, too? And Tyler! He's walking. Have you talked to him?"

Austin wanted to groan. He'd still been avoiding the other man. He didn't know what to say, was too afraid to actually try and speak to him because every time he did, he thought back to that day. Tyler lying on the floor, blood everywhere and his friend screaming in agony. The best way to not think about it was to avoid all reminders. Thanksgiving was going to be just as challenging as it was heaven-sent. "Not yet, Ally."

"I know," she immediately apologized. "You've barely had time to call me, I shouldn't ask that!"

"Don't apologize," he answered. "It's okay. I just… I need time."

"He's doing so well though," she added. "He's doing really well. Cassidy, too. It's weird—she's different but the same, if that makes sense."

"How are your friends at the shelter and hospital?"

She could chatter for hours, which was what he loved. He didn't have to talk about him; she would tell him whatever he asked. "Oh, they're great! I saw SGT West the other day. I told him I'd be there for the holidays again this year and he was quite pleased to hear it. Brandon has a girlfriend! She's a sweetie. They both come to volunteer from time to time. He says he's gotten a promotion at his job, which is awesome! Isn't it amazing how he went from where he was to where he is now? I can't believe it. And then there's Matt. Not much has changed there, but I'll go there every day if it means he'll smile if only for a few minutes. He's such a sweetheart, Austin and only this mean man comes to visit him and the nurse tells me that he yells often—oh no, I wasn't supposed to tell you that, because she wasn't supposed to tell me! But you won't say anything, right?"

"No, I promise. That is horrible." He closed his eyes. "Reminds me of my father."

"Oh! I didn't think of that. It does. Have you talked to your mother at all?"

He nodded, even though she couldn't see her. "I meant to tell you about that. I spoke to her yesterday, it was awkward. She says she told my father—everything. I don't think she's lying, and it sounds like the house is very awkward right now. I'm surprised he didn't erupt and break the entire place down. I guess it was coming though, and I don't know what's going to happen when I do come back home and see everyone again. I know I've got places with you guys, but I would like some closure there regardless."

"I'm sure you'll find it," she assured him. "Your mom is doing her best it seems, right? I mean, she told him. That's a great start."

"Yeah," he said softly. "I do miss her. She was always supportive of me when he wasn't. That's why it was so weird when she agreed with him that night." He smiled at a memory, "She used to sneak me things when he wasn't around. I got a really awesome guitar for my birthday one time, she gave it to me when he was at work. It was the one he broke."

That hurt him more than anything. He loved that guitar with all of his heart and his father just shattered it. "Oh, Austin."

"It's over now. Otherwise, yeah, that's about it. I don't know what to expect, but hey."

"And how's Taylor? Have you made any other buddies since coming home?"

Dude! Brant's voice filled his head. "Not really," he lied. He just couldn't tell her about him. He was the scum of scum, but he helped Austin when he needed it, so he really couldn't complain. "Taylor's good. He's not here right now, at the gym. He's been trying to bulk up and stay in shape. He's convinced we can get deployed again at any moment."

He heard the alarm in her voice, "You can?"

"No, probably not. They don't generally make a unit go out twice within two years."

"Oh, good. You scared me."

He hoped not, at least. It wasn't unheard of, but it was uncommon. Austin wouldn't survive another deployment, he was sure of it. "I'm sorry." A tiny smile crossed his face. "We need to pick up where we left off in that cottage."

He could almost hear her face turn pink. "Yeah?"

"Oh yeah." He thought about how soft her skin was, how beautiful she was all over. "I can't wait to hold you close again. I don't want to ever let go."

"Let's not," she murmured.

"I don't think the army would like that."

"Right," she said softly. "Right. Well, it's not like we're going to get much… alone time anyway."

"I will find alone time," he snorted.

Ally giggled again, "Oh, Austin."

"What are you thankful for, Ally?"

"Meeting you."

He felt his heart jump in his chest. "Funny, I was going to say the same thing."

A knock came on his door. "Oh, someone is here. I got to go. I'll call you soon, I promise. I love you so much, Ally. I hope you know that."

"Of course!" she laughed. "I'll always know that. I love you, too. Be safe, Austin."

She hung up the phone and he glanced at the door. Brant had a habit of barging in, and Taylor wouldn't have knocked, so he had no idea who was on the other side. He immediately went to where he'd stashed the remaining three pills, under his bed, pushing them further back in the small jar he'd used, wondering if maybe superiors were making rounds. He even pushed some dirty clothes on top of it.

Finally, he made his way to the door, opening it to reveal an enlisted soldier, but definitely one higher ranked then him, who he didn't recognize. The man was Hispanic and short, but burly and definitely someone he knew not to mess with. Why was he knocking on his door? He realized he'd been too busy staring at him to actually answer.

"Hi, can I help you?"

"Hi! I was just wondering, a few days ago, I saw someone come to your room."

Austin immediately froze. Brant was going to get him in so much trouble. "Uh, yeah?"

The man chuckled, shaking his head. "This sounds crazy, because I don't know if it was her or not, but I thought it was. A short redhead with curly hair?"

"Alex?" he murmured. Immediately, Rocky's face came to mind.

"Yes!" The man smiled easily. "Would you mind if I came in? I don't really want to talk about this in the hall."

Austin shrugged, letting him in. "What's this about? Alex isn't here anymore."

"Oh, I know." He shifted a bit. "You see, I was deployed with uh… Rocky the first time around. I thought I saw her, but I was too nervous to actually say hi. I didn't what to upset her, but now I feel kind of bad. We were close, you know? He and I and I really loved his girlfriend."

Austin realized who he was talking to. Ally had mentioned him at the funeral, an older soldier who had been with Alex during the ceremony and after. She had mentioned that he was his first sergeant and had been one hell of a good friend to him before and after the deployment. "You're … you were at the funeral."

"Oh, were you there?"

"No," he muttered. "I was still deployed." Austin added, "My girlfriend was. I believe you met her and her best friend. My girlfriend is Ally."

"Oh yes! I did." He shifted on his feet again. "Anyway, I just wanted to see if it was her. I couldn't imagine her coming here, but I guess I wasn't wrong. I'm Travis, by the way. I'm in a different platoon now, but still in the same unit. I know Rocky was your sergeant at the end, and I'm sorry that you lost him. Don't be a stranger, alright? I'm around often, would love to know anyone who obviously knew Hanson!" The man bowed his head. "And sorry if I was disturbing anything, I don't have very good timing!"

Austin forced a smile. "Not at all. It's all good. See you around, man."

"Yeah, something like that," he agreed. "I didn't catch your name?"

"Austin," he said. "I'm Austin Moon."

"Alright, see you around then. Have a good night." And with that, he was gone.

Austin sighed, leaning against the door. That was close. He was lucky that the man wasn't there to question him about hanging out with the loud mouthed soldier, or to search his room. Maybe he was just guilty but with the pills there, he didn't want to be too loose with who he let in. Just as he walked away from the door, Taylor came in, dropping his bag near the bathroom, ignoring him like he'd done for the last month or so. Yeah, Ally, he thought, Taylor's great. He's just ignoring me because I'm a fucking asshole.

He rolled his eyes, leaning back on the bed. He thought about Alex and her arrival. Her thoughts brought back Rocky and he swallowed hard, knowing he wasn't going to be able to escape any time soon literally or figuratively. He could leave the room, but he couldn't get trashed that night. He had work early. And his mind was only going to get darker and eat him away faster.

Fucking hell. He was supposed to feel good after talking to Ally. She was his warmth in a cold spell. But then he had to show up, make for disaster.

He needed something. He eyed the pills beneath the bed, wondering if he should take another two. They'd worked wonders the time before and it had been the first time he'd slept through the night in a few weeks. The alcohol itself wasn't doing as much as it used to. He knew though it would be hard to play them off to Taylor, who was only a room away. He glanced that direction, hearing the sink on. Quickly, he dove under the bed, grabbing the small jar and taking two more of the pills out of it. The two small lifelines slid down this throat easily and he sighed in relief when he realized he'd escaped having to explain anything this time around.

Austin leaned back on the bed, closing his eyes. Sleep would come to him.

Letters from Home

Ally balanced several bags in her hands, walking the distance from the road to the beautiful beach house. She wasn't planning on making such a big deal out of it—really she didn't even know about it until she called the couple that morning. Clara had only mentioned it in passing – 'Oh, Casey's birthday was a couple weeks ago, but today we're going to plan the nursery if you want to stop by' – and she felt dumb. She immediately raced to the nearest bakery and picked up a cake. And cookies. And cupcakes. And they even had balloons!

Enough that before she even got to the door, Casey was opening it with a bemused expression on his face, "And to what do I owe the balloons?"

Ally smiled sweetly, almost dropping the other bags, "Happy Belated Birthday!"

He chuckled, not sure what was going on, "Thank you. You didn't have to bring balloons."

"I brought more than just balloons," she admitted sheepishly as he helped her inside, taking a couple of the bags and bringing them into the kitchen. The two of them set them down on the table and the 20 year old whistled.

"Thank you," he again laughed. "For bringing a bakery."

"Everything looked so good!" she insisted, biting her lip. "I swear, I couldn't just get one. Besides, I thought it wouldn't hurt since we're going to be busy today. I even brought…" she trailed off, digging through one of the bags. "Lemonade!"

Casey's face lit up as Clara walked into the room, having a similar expression to her husband's. "Oh. I forgot I told you it was his birthday. Is that lemonade?"

"Yes!"

The other two chuckled as Clara inspected what she bought, shaking her head. "Ally, you have outdone yourself.

She then remembered why she was there, nearly flying the short distance to the woman pouring glasses of the drink her husband loved so much. "WHAT ARE YOU HAVING?!"

"An early birth if you ever do that again," she joked, shaking her head.

The drinks were passed out and she wrapped an arm around her husband, "Do you want to tell her, or should I?"

Casey shrugged, "I'll do it."

"TELL ME!" she whined, dancing up and down.

"We're having a boy," he announced, looking proudly to his wife, who beamed back at him.

Ally shrieked excitedly, clapping her hands.

The two of them chuckled, opening up the cake and putting candles on it. The "old man" as Clara giggled, was pushed out of the room as they were lit and called back in to both girls singing the famous song, Clara holding one hand to her baby boy. Soon, half of the cake was gone and the group got up, walking toward the bedroom area. Ally babbled as they walked along, a bit surprised when they stopped in front of Austin's room. She hadn't expected them to use it.

"What are you doing with Austin's things?" she asked quietly.

Casey noticed her tone, "He's always welcome here. We're just making room for the baby." He motioned for her to follow and she noticed the bed was already gone. Everything else was still in tact, but several more things were in boxes. Clara bent down, taking a few pictures that had fallen and put them back where they belonged. Soon, tasks were assigned and everything was boxed up and labeled. Clara grinned a bit, "Hey, Ally. Do you want this?"

It was an old shirt. Her cheeks burned when she realized who it belonged to, shrugging her shoulders. He wore his shirts pretty tight, so the shirt wasn't too big, still she clung to it as it was handed to her, holding it so close that she swore she could smell the beach and her boyfriend on it. Without the posters there and the instruments in the corner, the room didn't remind her of him anymore and she was getting more and more desperate to see him every day. It was only two weeks away and she wasn't sure how much longer she could wait.

"What are you two doing for Thanksgiving?"

The couple shared a look, "Not much." Casey was first to turn to her. "It's not really a big thing for us. It's just us. Clara's Aunt Stormie is still in California."

Ally bit her lip. "One second!" She ran out of the room and made a quick phone call to Dez, asking if another two could be added to their little getaway. With a wide smile, she reentered the room. "How would you like to go to Georgia for a few days… and see Austin?"

The two didn't have to even share a look when Clara easily said, "Sure."

"Are you going to call Austin?" Ally blurted suddenly, her eyes widening in both excitement and shock. "Oh my Gosh, you have to call Austin! Call Austin!"

Casey glanced at the clock, "It's early still. I thought he doesn't get off until around five."

She slumped against the wall. "Oh, right." Her eyes perked again. "Leave a message?"

"I'd really rather tell him via a phone call."

"You don't have to tell him what you're having," she suggested, "But tell him you found out and that you're planning the nursery and have him call you back!"

The man considered this, "Alright."

Soon, they were all crowded around the man's phone, listening to the ringer until it went to voicemail. "Hey, dude. It's me. Just wanted to call and tell you we were at the doctor's yesterday and give you the good news. I would rather tell you yourself and not the voicemail, so hey, give me a call back when you get a chance, alright?"

Ally stole the phone, "Hi, Austin! I'm with them both! I'm so happy! So, we're currently taking the things out of your old room and making it the nursery! And get excited, Casey and Clara are coming to Thanksgiving, too. Alright, I'm going to give the phone back to your best friend because it's actually incredibly rude to do what I just did… oops. I'm sorry, Casey. Here you go."

The older man chuckled, shaking his head. "Alright, man. I'll talk to you soon. Bye."

The afternoon was still young when Ally said goodbye to her friends, making the trip across town to the VA for her almost daily visit with Matt. She was determined to make up where the state was leaving off, helping him where the others couldn't. She smiled warmly at an unfamiliar nurse, quickly explaining her mission and then went toward his room. Matt was in bed, but looking as if he were busy, trying to write on paper. His motor skills were hindered too by his injuries and often he could hardly keep a pen steady, let alone write.

"Afternoon," she announced, bouncing into the room with the leftovers from Casey's. "I bring the yummiest of the yummy!"

A raised eyebrow.

"Hello to you too," she teased, setting down a couple piece of cake and a few other goodies she'd managed to steal. "What are you doing?"

He raised the paper slowly and she couldn't quite understand what it said, but she smiled anyway. She took the paper from his hands, noticing he had actually succeeded, while messily writing his name. She beamed back at him. "Great job."

"Working," he said slowly. "On it."

Ally wanted to jump for joy. Progress, she realized. This was the progress the state missed. "That is awesome, Matt. Soon, you'll be writing novels."

Another raised eyebrow. "Don't question me!" She began to set up a tray for him, gathering a few napkins and then pouring a tiny bit of the lemonade from earlier. She served him and then herself a small cupcake, still full from earlier. "What do you want to do today?"

Matt shrugged.

"Alright, we can just hang out." Ally smiled slightly. "My boyfriend's brother is having a baby boy. I'm so happy for him."

"Brother?" he questioned slowly. "Brother?"

"Yes, Austin has a half brother named Casey. It's a very long story, believe me."

The man looked confused, but continued to eat regardless. Ally realized the remote was not near her and figured it was in the drawer beside his bed, opening it to search so that she could put on a TV show, or music for them. To her surprise, a small, worn Polaroid picture sat on top, of a young blond boy in the sand. He beamed up at the camera with an odd familiarity to him, and she twisted it so Matt could see.

"Who is that? He's adorable."

She wondered if Matt had a son.

He didn't answer her.

"Do you know him?"

He nodded.

"He looks quite happy."

"He was," the man whispered softly.

"Was?"

Matt looked guarded suddenly, "No."

"What's the matter?"

He shook his head. "Change."

"Change what?" He didn't answer her. "Okay, we'll talk about something else."

She was at odds to why he seemed upset by a picture that seemed to at one point well loved. It was torn and looked as if it had been through hell and back. She fingered it as she wondered. Eventually, she dropped it back in the drawer where it came from.

Letters from Home

He was exhausted by the time he returned to his room late afternoon from work. They'd let them off early, much to his surprise, and he hoped somehow, he'd be able to rest that night without having to resort to the measures he'd been using recently. He knew better than that, but a part of him still prayed. Austin dragged his sore body up the stairs to his room, stopping short when he noticed a message from Casey. A tiny smile crept up his face at that, knowing that his best friend had gone to the doctor the day before to see what he'd be welcoming with Clara.

"One second," he murmured as he unlocked the door, getting inside and shutting it behind him. He sank down onto his bed, kicking off his work boots and jacket. Then, he took his phone and pressed the voicemail button, excited to hear what his friend had to say.

At first, he was pleased. Casey sounded overjoyed despite his admittance that he didn't want to tell him over voicemail, but then Ally got onto the phone. He couldn't help but chuckle at her excitement too—she was always so happy for others, until she said something that made his heart drop and his feeling plummet.

We're currently taking the things out of your old room and making it the nursery!

They were getting rid of his room. Austin dropped the phone without meaning to, feeling his throat tighten and tension move into his shoulders. He wanted to call them back and question them on why they were taking his room away, but the voice in his head was there before he could do much else.

Why do you think they're getting rid of the room? They're tired of your shit. They don't want to deal with someone who'd rather drown his sorrows in liquor and pills. Fucking idiot. You're old news.

"No," he whispered. They wouldn't do that to him. Casey was his brother!

He doesn't want a brother like you! What is he going to tell that baby when you come into the house drunk and smelling like some whore? You really don't think Ally is going to stick around once she finds out, do you?

"Shut up," he pleaded.

Probably already dumped your shit into the garbage. You're worthless, Austin.

The last three words were in Ally's voice and he bit back a scream, jumping to his feet and quickly throwing on his shoes again. He reached for his keys and his phone, tearing through the door so fast he probably left burn marks. He was down the hall within seconds, pounding on the only man he knew could get him through this, make the voice go away. He answered on the second knock and the twisted smile the man offered should have been his first hint to get the hell out of there. No, he walked right in.

Austin quickly turned to the man, "Whatever you got, I want. Give it all to me. I don't want to remember today."

He probably should have never done what he did that night because he awoke toward the morning hours hunched over a toilet bowl, puking his guts out. Austin swore quietly, not sure how he got there. The room spun and his stomach was churning and cramping to the point he was paralyzed. Most of all, he was scared. He had no memory past walking up to the door of the loudmouthed southern man, and wondered what he'd done in the hours in which he'd blacked out.

Almost sober now, he felt sick for another reason. What was he thinking?

Ally would never think of him that way. Despite it not being the kind of sleep he wanted, he did get some rest and his mind was clearer. She loved him and would hate to see him like this. Just as he went to curse himself, a light was flicked on and he saw Brant standing over him, stoned and smirking down at him. "Don't get that shit on my floor."

"What did you give me?"

"You asked for enough not to remember today. Did it work?"

"No," he spat, angrily. "I feel like I'm dying. What did I have?"

"A little bit of everything. I believe you polished off a couple six packs, half a bottle of vodka, a blunt or two, and a few of the pills I'd given you before."

He swam where he sat. "Oh my God. You're lucky I'm not dead!"

"You're lucky you're not dead," he countered. "You asked for it!"

"I don't know what the fuck I had! That's not fair!" Austin yelled back. "What the hell, man?"

"Listen," the other man growled. "I'm not responsible for whatever the fuck you drink the moment you put that bottle to your mouth. I'm not your fucking parents, I'm not going to tell you it's a bad idea. I'm here for a good time, I'm not here to be your babysitter. Now man the fuck up, shut up, and take a hit of the blunt. It'll get rid of the stomach pain."

"Yeah, right."

Brant shrugged his shoulders. "Fine by me."

Austin was in agony, but he pushed himself off the ground regardless. He stumbled out of the room, grabbing his things which were littered around the floor, and stumbled from his friend's room back to his own, letting himself in. He couldn't sit still, but moving was like trying to take repeated hits to the gut.

"Holy fuck," he groaned, walking into the bathroom where he sat back down on the floor.

He looked at his phone, seeing another missed call from Ally, and a text from Casey and Dez. He closed his eyes momentarily, apologizing to them all in his head for how he acted earlier. It wasn't warranted; he was so tired and out of it that he assumed the worse. Clear headed for the most part, it made sense that his friend was using the biggest room other than his own for the nursery and he should be excited for the news, not assuming he wasn't an important part of his life anymore.

It was almost four am, but he didn't care. He quickly sent Dez a text back, then Casey, promising to call him the next day. Finally, he texted his girlfriend, the one he felt most sorry for because somehow, she always ended up with the worst end of it.

I fucked up tonight. Don't worry about it, I'm fine and it won't happen again. Rough day, got Casey's message. I'm going to find out the news tomorrow. I love you so much, I couldn't make it without you, I couldn't do it without you. I couldn't be here without you.