For those confused about the time line: Remember that this story is placed in the year 2013. The update that had Derek crying was placed in 2006 because it was a flashback (that's why it was in italics) from when Meredith left the first time. Anyways, I hope you guys are still enjoying the fic! No matter how much you guys beg, I'm not going to tell you how the story turns out. I hope you guys like Sam, though. I love him!



Part 4: Runaway Train

Chapter 48

"Okay, so you want to tell me why we're strolling along a deserted beach?" Meredith asked as the waves crashed around her, barely missing her now barefoot feet.

"Well, you didn't want to be bored," Sam answered.

"No, really," Meredith said, trying to sound serious. "Why here?"

Sam put his hands in his pockets and looked up at the sky before letting his eyes cast down at Meredith, "Well, because I love it here."

"So there is a nonsarcastic sensitive side of Sam after all?" she joked as a wave barely touched her feet, allowing the cold water to send shivers through her body.

"Maybe," Sam said looking down at the sand as they continued to walk.

Maybe I'm amazed at the way you love me all the time
Maybe I'm afraid of the way I love you
Maybe I'm amazed at the way you pulled me out of time
And hung me on a line
Maybe I'm amazed at the way I really need you

"I like it out here," Meredith said, interrupting a sweet silence that had grew between them. "It's quiet and relaxed. It's beautiful." Sam smiled at her, but offered her now response. "What? No sarcastic remark?" she joked.

"Maybe I'm a little more complex than you give me credit for," Sam answered, still smiling at her, creating his own weakening look.

Meredith smiled back at him before casting her eyes over to the crashing waves, "Maybe you are."

Maybe I'm a girl and maybe I'm a lonely girl
Who's In the middle of something
That she doesn't really understand

"Meredith?" Sam asked, tearing her eyes back towards him. "Why did you do it? Why did you run from the wedding and then from Derek too?"

Meredith looked down at the sand as she crossed her arms over her chest for protection from the sea breeze. "Derek and I, we're complicated. Every time I go back to him, promises are made, but then are broken. Then I end up hurt and broken." She looked back up at Sam with tears clouding her eyes, "I'm just so tired of being broken." She looked back down at the sand, willing her tears to go away. "I knew I didn't love Ryan. If I left him, I knew it would hurt, but if I married him and then left him, that'd kill him. There was no easy solution. There still isn't. But that's all that I had."


Maybe I'm a girl and maybe you're the only man
Who could ever help me
Baby won't you help me understand

"Meredith, everything that is broken can be fixed," Sam said softly. "It'll take time, and a lot of work, but one day, you won't be broken anymore."

"Does it really go away?" Meredith asked, looking in his eyes expectantly.

"I don't know, but I'm determined to be optimistic," Sam joked, eliciting a small giggle from her mouth.

A few silent moments went between them before Meredith spoke again, "Your ex-wife, she did a real number on you, didn't she?"

Sam let out a nervous laugh, "Yeah, you could say that."

Maybe I'm a girl and maybe I'm a lonely girl

Who's In the middle of something
That she doesn't really understand

"What happened?" Meredith asked, a little afraid that she was over stepping some boundaries, having only known him for four days.

Sam looked up to the sky, as if he was looking for some type of explanation. Finding none, he turned back towards Meredith. "It was complicated. That's just how love is. Complicated. But, I… I gave up. I gave in to the complications that the world puts out for love nowadays. It's like life is completely against anyone being happy anymore. But when you really love someone, you have to fight through all that. It's possible, people… people like me… we just give in too early.

Maybe I'm a girl and maybe you're the only man
Who could ever help me
Baby won't you help me understand

"You really loved her, didn't you?" Meredith said, not really thinking about her words.

Sam laughed a little, "Well I was married to her, wasn't I?" he asked receiving a small chuckle from her. "But yeah, despite everything that happened, I did. I did and to this day, I still do. I don't think I ever won't. Not to sound gay or anything," he said eyeing Meredith, "But it's an all consuming love. The kind of love you can't forget. No matter how many times you push it away, tell yourself it's over and that it's never coming back, or try again with other people. Despite all of that, it's still there, fighting for itself. It's the kind of love that makes you forgive that person no matter what they do. The kind where that person does everything, but nothing at the exact time. It's just… unimaginable. It seems outrageous and dreamlike. But that's the thing, when you have love like that, it's like you're living out your dreams."

Maybe I'm amazed at the way you're with me all the time
Maybe I'm afraid of the way I leave you
Maybe I'm amazed at the way you help me sing my song
Right me when I'm wrong

And right in the second, she realized how much she really did miss Derek.

Maybe I'm amazed at the way I really need you