A/N: Twilight and all characters associated with it do not belong to me. What I do have is a 16 oz Monster energy drink and I may even need a second one b/c 9 am came way too early today. =] Thanks again for all your lovely reviews and adding my story to your alerts/favs! And please be patient with Bella, and Edward. =] Song for this chapter-"Waiting"-Adele.

"Well, everything is looking good for you Bella. Your stomach is measuring at twenty three weeks instead of twenty one, but like I said for the baby we'll keep an eye on you and it may just be that she's a big baby. Which is never a bad thing." Dr. Gingrich said with a smile.

"At least we know she's healthy." Edward said with a smile. "That's exactly right. Do either of you have any questions for me today?" Dr Gingrich asked looking at both of us. We both shook our heads no and I thanked her for her time. We followed her out to the reception area and scheduled our next appointment, and then headed outside.

"Do you want to grab some lunch or something?" Edward asked as I unlocked my car. "Actually Alice is coming over for lunch; she's probably already there knowing her, but you're welcome to join us." I offered with a small smile.

"Yeah, okay …if you're sure?" He agreed hesitantly. "Edward, its fine. It's only me and Alice." I said with a laugh. He laughed nervously, and ran his hand through his hair. "Okay, I'll meet you there." He said walking towards his car. I got in the car and started it, and then pulled out my cell phone to text Alice.

Edward is coming over for lunch with us. =/ I'm nervous. –B

Oohh should I leave? Let you two enjoy each other's company for awhile? -A

NO! Don't you dare leave Mary Alice! –B

I was kidding! Calm down. I'll be here. –A

Thank you! –B

I dropped my phone back in my purse, and then drove off. I tried not to speed, but it was difficult. I didn't want to show up last, and have those two up there scheming on how to get Edward back home faster. Which I so would not put it past them to do; especially Alice. With that thought I put my foot down on the accelerator and sped the rest of the way home. I was glad to find that Edward wasn't here yet, so I took my time walking up to our apartment. The door was unlocked so I walked on in, and called, "Honey, I'm home." I turned to close the door, and someone came up behind me and covered my eyes.

I'll remove my hands if you can keep your eyes closed, and trust me." Alice stated a smile in her voice. "Is Edward here?" I asked with a sigh. "Not yet. He's bringing the other half of your surprise. Now, take my hand, there you go, and here we go. We're going to walk slowly so you don't run into any walls." Alice instructed, holding my hand and elbow. We were in the nursery; I could tell by the smell of fresh paint. After another couple of minutes Alice released me, and said I could open my eyes. I cracked one eye open, and then the other, and gasped at what I saw. In the corner of the room there was a glider rocking chair; hot pink and zebra print on the fabric.

"Oh my god, Alice! This is fabulous!" I exclaimed. "Where did you find this?" I asked walking over to sit on the chair. I groaned as I sat down; it was so comfortable. I propped my feet up on the stool, and rested my hands on my belly. "Rosalie found it in New York a couple of weeks ago. She bought it and had it delivered to her house. Emmett just left a few minutes ago." Alice explained with a smile.

She reached into the crib, and pulled a hot pink and zebra print diaper bag. I squealed in delight reaching for the bag. "Oh my god! This is too much! What's with all the surprises?" I asked, opening the bag to find pacifiers and a few bottles in it. "You said you didn't want a baby shower. You never said we couldn't get you anything anyway." Alice stated with a shrug.

"Knock, knock!" Edward called from the living room. "We're in the nursery!" Alice called back, her smile growing wider. "Oh man, what else did you guys do?" I asked smiling despite myself. "This one was all Edward. He found it, he picked it out and he's bringing it in here." She stated. I turned towards the door in time to see Edward pushing a hot pink stroller, and carrying a hot pink car seat. I laughed and shook my head.

"I know, I know. I tried my damndest to find zebra print, but I couldn't find it so I settled for hot pink. What do you think?" Edward asked with a grin. I walked over and hugged him tightly to me, and whispered thank you in his ear. Tears were springing to my eyes so I pulled away from him and went to inspect the stroller and car seat. I dried my eyes quickly, and sighed happily.

"I can't believe we have all of this and I'm only going to be five months pregnant." I stated sitting down in the rocking chair again. "Well, we still need a swing, and a bouncer, and a high chair, but this is a pretty good start. Esme said she and Carlisle will take care of the swing and high chair, so all we have to buy is a bouncer and some other small stuff." Edward explained quickly.

"That's not all you have to buy. What about clothes, and diapers, and wipes, and a baby bathtub, and bottles, an-"

"Alice, slow down. We have some time to get all that stuff." Edward said gently cutting her off. "I brought Chinese food by the way." He said as an after thought. I rubbed my stomach, and smiled as the baby kicked me.

"She's moving again." I said softly. Edward grinned from ear to ear, and came over to feel for himself. Alice excused herself saying she was hungry. Edward laid his head in my lap, and placed both hands on my stomach with a smile still on his face. We sat there for a few minutes in silence as the baby moved all over the place. I began running my fingers through Edward's hair, and smiled to myself.

This was how it was supposed to be all the time. Us sharing in little moments like this, being happy. I felt a wave of emotion threatening to overtake me, and I tried to push Edward away. He wouldn't budge though. He did move his hands, and raise his head up just enough to look at me.

"I miss you, Bella." He said quietly. "I miss you, too." I admitted as the first few tears started falling. "Then why aren't we together? Why are we still doing this?" He asked wiping my tears away even as more began falling.

"Because, Edward. I don't know if I can trust you anymore. I don't feel like I'm enough for you, and I'm afraid that if things started going wrong for us you'd turn to another woman just like you did this time." I explained softly.

"I will never do that to you again, Bella, I swear." He said fervently. "You said that before, and then you lied to me about Victoria, and you kissed her. How am I supposed to believe you now?" I asked.

"You said you understood about that. So were you lying to me then?" He asked leaning away from me. "No, of course I wasn't. But just because I understand why you did it doesn't make it okay that you did it in the first place." I replied.

"I know." He sighed. "You really hurt me, Edward. I'm trying to forgive you for that, and to move past it, but it isn't easy." I explained.

"Not to sound like an asshole or anything, but you've really hurt me in the past. And I forgave you and moved past it because you're worth it to me. You're the most important thing in the world to me, Bella. What I need to know is am I enough for you? Am I worth it, and important enough for you to forgive me? Because if I'm not…then I'd rather know now." He said quietly.

"You've always been enough for me, Edward. And you'll always be worth it, and important to me, but I just…" I trailed off.

"You just what, Bella?" He asked. "I just need some more time." I whispered. He nodded his head in understanding. "Then I'll leave, and give you some space to figure things out. I'll be waiting, Bella. Because I love you and I need you. I'll wait for you to love me again." He stated, and then he walked out.

I wanted to run after him, to tell him I did love him and that I wanted him back home, but instead I walked into the kitchen where Alice sat, eating her Chinese food. I pulled my food out, and put Edward's in the refrigerator. I sat down across from Alice, and started eating though I wasn't hungry anymore. About halfway through my food I started crying so hard I couldn't see anything but the tears.

"Do you want me to call him sweetie?" Alice asked squeezing my hand. I shook my head no, and tried to calm myself down. "I think you need him more than you think you do." She said softly.

"I'm scared of needing him so badly, Alice. He can really hurt me." I admitted. "I know it's scary, Bella, but he would never hurt you like he did again. Trust me he's learned his lesson, and he's paying for it more than he should have to just by the guilt he feels. Let me call him." She pleaded.

"No, not yet." I stated firmly. "You're so stubborn!" Alice groaned. I eventually calmed down enough to finish my food, and then I cleaned up our mess. "You're going to have to stop pushing him away at some point Bella. You have to realize he isn't your dad, and he isn't Jacob. He would never do the things that they did to you." She explained. "I know that, Alice." I replied hotly.

"Do you? Because the way you're acting I don't think you do. Yes, Edward screwed up, and he admitted to that and has apologized for it many times. He learns from his mistakes, Bella. He doesn't keep making them." She retorted.

"I'm tired, Alice. I'm going to go to bed." I said dryly. With a heavy sigh and a shake of her head, she hugged me goodbye and left. I took my phone and went to lie down. I was just starting to doze off when my phone chirped.

Are you alright? –E

I've been better. –B

What can I do? –E

Hold me. Love me. Never do this to me again. –B

I'll be there in ten minutes. –E

I don't know, Edward. Maybe we're moving too fast. –B

It's been over a month, love. Please don't push me away anymore. –E

I don't know if I'm ready for this. –B

Just for tonight then. We'll take it one day at a time. –E

Okay. I can handle that. –B

I'm on my way. –E

I lay there waiting for Edward; thinking about what I wanted to say to him. I knew what my body wanted me to do to him, but I wasn't giving in to that temptation tonight. There was too much at stake, and too much that needed to be said. I got up from the bed and walked out into the kitchen to plug my phone back into the charger. Then I grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge, and took a long swig. I put the bottle back in the fridge, went to the bathroom, and climbed back into bed. Not long after that Edward came walking into the bedroom; a nervous expression on his face. I smiled at him, and patted the spot next to me on the bed. He smiled back, and climbed into bed. He held his arms open, and I immediately snuggled into his chest.

"Hey beautiful." He greeted quietly. I closed my eyes, and sighed in contentment. Being held by him, with his arms around me felt like home. I had missed him terribly, but I had to keep reminding myself that just because he was here tonight didn't mean he'd be here tomorrow night. Especially after we talked. Which we needed to do before I fell asleep in his arms.

"Okay, love. Let's talk." He said as if reading my mind.

"You hurt me really bad, Edward. And before all this happened I never would have thought you would do something like that. But, now I'm afraid of you having that much power over me. I'm scared it will happen again, and I just…I don't think I could make it through that twice." I explained. "Or, what happens if a few years down the road when the baby is a bit older, and so am I, you decide you want someone else? Someone younger, or better in some way than I am, or who isn't a mother?" I asked.

"I know how badly I've hurt you, Bella, and I can't apologize enough for that. What I can tell you is that it will never happen again, and I will never want anyone but you and our daughter forever. I will spend the rest of our lives together proving that to you." He replied.

"I want to believe you, Edward." I sighed. "Then believe it, love. Stop thinking about the what ifs because they won't ever happen. Just hear what I'm promising you now, and believe that it's true because it is. I will never hurt you again. I will never betray your trust again. I will only ever want you for the rest of my life." He stated firmly.

"You make it sound so easy." I said. "I know it isn't easy, love. I know it's the hardest thing you've had to do in a long time, but I also know you can do it. I know it will take time to earn your trust back, and I'm okay with that. I'm just asking for the chance to prove it to you, and to do that I need to come home. We can take it one day at a time until you're feeling more confident with the situation." He answered quickly.

I looked out the window, and realized it was raining a moment before a loud clap of thunder shook the apartment, and lightening flooded the darkened room for a split second. I sighed heavily, and moved away from Edward. "You're asking a lot of me given the circumstances." I finally said.

"Alice told me what she said to you earlier, and she's right you know. I'm not your father, and I'm not Jacob, but I think you confuse me with them sometimes." He said getting up. "Where are you going?" I asked standing up as well. "I'm leaving, Bella. You're obviously not comfortable with me being here yet, and you've made it clear that you haven't forgiven me. So I'm going to go back to Alice's house and go to bed. You call me whenever you decide what you want." He stated putting his shoes on, and grabbing his bag.

I followed him outside in the pouring rain, yelling his name the whole way. He finally turned around after throwing his bag into the car and yelled, "What? What do you want Bella?"

"I want things to be okay with us!" I yelled back. "Well, that depends entirely on you, Bella! What more can I possibly do or say to make you realize that I'm sorry I fucked up and that I'm trying to make it up to you?" He demanded.

"Kiss me!" I blurted out. He looked surprised, but didn't hesitate. He walked towards me with purpose, cupped my face in his hands, and kissed me. This kiss was rough, and demanding, and perfect.