Chapter 53
A/N: Wow… long time, no see. Regretting to say that this took me so long. Good news: marching band is now over and I am not the drum major until next season begins, so I have a little more time now. Bad news: Now I'm in a little show called 12 Angry Jurors so… yup… we'll see, but I promise I'll update as much as possible. I haven't given up on this story. – E. B.
Lotte smiled at Gustave as he softly cooed to his giggling little brother. He hadn't taken his eyes off of his new siblings all day, and though Lotte had to admit that it was sweet, she was missing having her new husband all to herself.
"You haven't glanced at me once all day," she pointed out in the kindest tone that she could manage.
"Mother asked us to keep an eye on them. I'm just doing what she asked."
"Yeah, one eye, you've been using both." She sighed and put her arm around his shoulder from behind and kissed his cheek. "What was so important that your parents needed us to watch them anyway?"
"Mother said that she and Papa had to go downtown and cut the ribbon for a new store opening. They couldn't take the little ones with them. Besides, I told her that we don't mind watching them. They need the rest. They deserve it."
"You don't mind watching them," she muttered under her breath.
He rolled his eyes at the comment he wasn't supposed to hear and looked up at her. "You just haven't warmed up to them yet. Sit beside me and hold your arm out." As gently as he could manage, he placed baby Phillip in the crook of her arm. "See, isn't he precious?"
Her shoulders tensed. "I guess…"
"You're not going to drop him. Calm down, Lotte." He rolled his eyes and picked up one of his little sisters, softly cooing a lullaby to her as she slept.
Lotte huffed and slumped her shoulders. She stared at Phillip with an unintentional glare. Having a family was good, but it was all new to her. She thought that she and Gustave would have plenty of time before they were set apart by children. As it turned out, she was wrong. She loved that Gustave had more siblings, but in her opinion, he was taking it too far. He had a new wife too, and she wanted his attention.
In the midst of her thoughts, she felt the cotton blanket wrapped around Phillip slipping through her arm, but, by the time she realized it, she was too late. There was a scream, a muffled thud, and a ear-piercing cry. She immediately buried her face in her knees ashamed of what she had done and what she had thought. None of that would have happened if she had just been thankful for what she had.
She heard Gustave's freshly shined shoes squeak across the wood to put his sister down. Then he shuffled back to Phillip. Gently, he scooped the boy off of the floor and rocked him back and forth. When the screaming ceased, he tightly held Phillip against his chest with one arm and patted Lotte's head with the other.
"It's alright, Lotte," he said gently. "I saw it before it happened. My arm broke the fall. Don't be upset, dear. You can't help it."
"But I could have!" she screamed.
"It's fine, Lotte," he said sternly. "Don't get upset. You'll wake the girls."
"It's not fine!" she yelled standing up and stamping her foot. "You talk about wanting children and a big family with a big house. There are things that I can't give you, Gustave! I can't take care of ten children when I don't even have two hands, and another thing…"
"No one is asking you to! I will be there. You have a family now. You…"
"What about when you're not there? You're a military man now, Gustave. You could have to leave me at any moment. What happens then?" A silence fell across the room as he looked at her in shock. "Exactly," she muttered through her tears. "You won't be here."
He put Phillip down and pressed his fingers to his temples in attempt to aid his throbbing head. "Look, we can hire help or something… I don't know. We don't have to worry about that now. Everything will work itself out you'll see."
"Hire somebody? Gustave, I don't want our children growing up thinking Mommy and Daddy can't care for them."
"No one is saying that. Stop putting words into my mouth."
"Well then stop putting actions into my future."
Gustave bit his lip as tears threatened to spill over his eyelids. "Well if that's how you feel, maybe we shouldn't have gotten married. Was I forcing something into your future when I said, 'I do?' Do you honestly think that I would force you to do something that big that you didn't want?"
"Gustave, I didn't mean it like that…"
"Then what did you mean?" he asked cutting her off. Turning his head so she couldn't see, a tear ran down his cheek. "I'm going up to my workshop. I'll take the triplets with me so you don't have to worry about them."
"Gustave…"
"I'll get over it, Lotte," he snapped. "I know you didn't mean it. Just leave me be for a little while will you? I'll be back later. Don't worry about supper. I'll bring you something later."
She nodded slowly and plopped down on the couch. "Gustave, just promise me something."
He sighed. "What is it?"
"Promise you'll come back…"
He turned towards her and chastely kissed her forehead. "I still love you. I'll always be back."
