Despite the difficultly Booth willingly loaded back into the car with Brennan early the next morning. She'd let him rest the entire day. Luckily he hadn't had another seizure. But the episode had done it's damage. Before they'd even left the hotel room he'd required a large dose of morphine. Walking had become a difficult task. He leaned against her and collapsed into the seat once they'd reached the car. Since he made no other movements she reached across him to buckle him in. That was when he sprung it on her. "Who were you talking to?" His voice was low, and staggering. She straightened up and looked at him, clearly confused by his question. "Who? When?"
He shut his eyes. After a moment he said tiredly, "before."
"Before when?"
He had no idea. He just blinked back up at her. The only thing she could think of was right before his seizure. She'd confirmed her pregnancy; the test had been positive. From there she'd immediately gotten on the phone with a doctor to book an appointment in New York. Her care wouldn't be there. She'd transfer everything back to D.C. But she wanted to get started. Yet she still didn't want Booth knowing. Not just yet. He needed to focus on himself. And with the current state he was in she wasn't sure he'd understand, anyway. "It's nothing, Booth."
"You're… cheating?"
Her heart stopped beating. "What?"
"Why… Amanda said…"
Her expression fell. As did her stomach. "She's not real, Booth. Remember?"
He glanced past her. She knew then that he no longer could tell the difference between real and fake. Everything his imaginary foe said imprinted into his conscious. In order to draw back his attention she kissed him on the lips. It took a heart breaking second before he responded back to her touch. "Rest," she urged, touching his cheek.
His eyes had already closed yet again. He nodded.
She pushed the limit as to how fast she could drive without being pulled over by police. There would be no more stops. No more overnights. She wasn't pulling over again until they were in New York. Booth couldn't take any more hold ups. Her fear motivated her. Time was against them, and winning.
Booth dozed on and off. He began trembling an hour and a half into their drive. Brennan woke him. "What's wrong? Are you cold?"
Again with the nod. She turned the heat on full blast. When she was dying of sweat and he still shook, she fished a blanket one handed out of the back seat and spread it over his body. It did little to deter the cold. But his trembling wasn't as fierce. He drifted off again.
In the quiet she allowed her thoughts to run wild. Pregnant. It wasn't the right time. Not that it stopped her from being ecstatic. It was the bright ray of sun in the otherwise dark storm. But how did she tell Booth? And when? Would it cheer him up, give him something more to fight for? Or would he become down on himself? She thought yet again of how much it bothered him to be an absentee father to Parker. Though it wasn't as though he could help it. Then there was the big question. Would he comprehend if she told him? If she had to judge by the behavior he'd demonstrated in the last twenty four hours, then no. What was she to do?
Suddenly the sound of his breathing became very noticeable to her. She shut off her mind to listen closely. There was something there that wasn't before. His breaths were more labored. But something else was going on. She listened harder before realizing what it was. Booth had become congested. After everything else now he was fighting off a cold. "Damn it!"
He stirred. She regretted her actions. "Sorry. Go back to sleep."
"Where are we going?"
"New York."
"Why?"
Unintentionally she gasped. Tears burned her eyes. No. Not now. This couldn't be happening. She had to remain collected. "To save your life."
When she saw him looking past her, her anger increased. "Whatever she's saying, don't listen. We will save you, Booth. This isn't the end. It's not your time."
Amanda was laughing and mocking Brennan. "She's lying to you. She's playing the 'good wife.' She really wants you out of the way so she can be with her other lover."
Booth winced. He knew better than to listen. But she was driving him insane. It was difficult for him to shut her out. When Brennan saw tears in his eyes she knew she needed to intervene. "She's not real. Listen to me."
"Who were you on the phone with?"
He was back to this? "No one, Booth."
"It was someone."
"It was a doctor."
"Which?"
She wasn't sure she could handle his questioning. She tried to keep telling herself he wasn't in his right mind. But she still went back and forth between wanting to protect him and wanting to throttle him. "It doesn't matter right now. Please, Booth. Just relax."
"I don't want to do this anymore, Bones."
"I know. We're almost there."
He passed out again. Bit by bit she was losing him. By the time they reached the New York state line he'd broken out into a fever. She stopped at a convenience store on the way. Inside in addition to juice and aspirin, she surprisingly found a thermometer. Once she paid for all the items she ran back to the car which she'd left running. The first thing she did was check his temperature. It was one hundred and two. She next fed him the aspirin. He drank enough juice to swallow the pills, but turned his head away when she offered more. "You need to drink," she told him gently. He stubbornly refused. "Booth-"
"I don't… wanna do this anymore." He repeated faintly. Outside lightning struck. Rain cascaded from the darkened sky.
She understood now what he meant. Booth was too tired to keep trying. He'd lost what little strength he had left. This developing cold was taking what the cancer hadn't been able to touch. He felt too ill to continue on. "Booth," she lowered her voice. She pulled him into her arms and held him. "You can't give up. We're too close."
Booth could hear Amanda even if he couldn't see her. "This is why it was so easy to dominate you. You're just as pathetic as you were then."
Booth's wrists and ankles hurt from being restrained. A presence rolled him onto his back. A strong force held down his hips. "If you remain still it'll all be over soon," a voice promised. "Then again, if you squirm, it'll be more fun for me."
Brennan knew he was hallucinating. She knew it the instant he tensed his muscles. "Booth! Come on!" She tried to bring him back to reality by touching his face. He recoiled, as if her hand was a hot poker. He breathed heavily in her arms, which of course was dangerous in his condition. She couldn't lose him. She had to bring him back. "Calm down. Please. Booth, it's me." She tried stroking his back. "Listen. It's me."
At last he stopped wiggling. He slumped against her. Since she had his attention she kept talking. "I know you're tired. I know you're sick. I know me knowing isn't doing you any good." She sighed. "But please don't stop fighting. Give this doctor a try." She gazed straight down into his eyes. "Give me a chance."
"She poisoned me," he whispered. "She made me sick."
"I know." Brennan wasn't all that sure. But for his sake she agreed. "You can't let her win. As hard as it is you have to fight this."
"Fight?" Amanda sneered in his mind. "Your fighting days are over. You've already got one foot in the grave."
Brennan's voice was suddenly right next to his ear, drowning out Amanda's laughing. "You can't quit, Booth. You can't. You're not just fighting for us anymore."
Intrigued and confused, he opened his eyes and gave her a questioning look. Who else was he living for? What was she talking about?
She exhaled deeply. This wasn't how she'd wanted to do this. But he needed to hear it, she decided. "It was a doctor I was on the phone with yesterday. I'm pregnant."
His eyes grew large. He was stunned into speechlessness.
"I'm not very far along. But I was arranging a check up with a doctor while we were in New York to be sure everything is all right."
"No way," he finally whispered. His eyes were still as wide as his sickness would allow them to be. He wore a dopey smile. It disappeared when he sneezed, reminding them both of the danger currently at hand.
"Just hold on a little bit longer. We need you." She couldn't imagine trying to raise a baby without him. His baby. This time when she offered him the bottle he drank until it was finished. Then he reclined back in his seat once again and closed his eyes. He breathed through his mouth as he fell back asleep.
He'll be all right, she told herself as she began driving again. He knows now. He won't give up. But she wasn't stupid. Things looked hopeless. She only hoped Booth would get through this latest bump in the road. She'd do whatever she could to see him through.
