Hey guys! So I know it's been an insanely long wait. Thank you for your patience. I hope you still remember and like this story at this point! But yeah, I have a new laptop now and went through two edits today so I could get this up for you guys literally as soon as possible. There's no Klaroline but I think it has a lot of answers and also the closure that I know a lot of people wanted.
Hope y'all like, please let me know :)
Previously: Klaus grew bored with NOLA and returned to Mystic Falls after having re-taken the throne – a power play that cost his allies, the witches, Davina. Tyler asked Klaus to protect Caroline but Caroline changed the deal to be that Klaus would personally train her to protect herself. Without informing Caroline, Tyler planned to make Mystic Falls vampire-free. Caroline ripped Hayley's heart out of her chest in front of Tyler before breaking up with him. Caroline arranged a séance so she could speak with Bonnie, whom she formed a plan with and who told her not to trust Adella. Caroline went to meet Adella to carry out their plan to kill Silas. However, she saw Tyler instead before everything went black. Upon realising Caroline was missing, Klaus flew to NOLA accompanied by Silas and went into a tailspin trying to find her, killing dozens of witches and vampires.
Chapter 22: If I Got Locked Away
Sandpaper and cotton wool.
Whatever those two felt and tasted like together, that was Caroline's tongue right now.
She tried to pry her eyes open and lift her head, but neither worked, and she felt a dry hiss escape her lips.
Distantly she heard someone approach and she tried at her eyes again but it was no use.
Her neck goddamn hurt, along with her spine, and her head felt like there was probably a stake wedged into it.
"Caroline?"
The familiarity of the voice, despite being unable to place it, drove her to force her eyes open.
Tyler.
He hovered above where she was sprawled on the floor. With her vision impaired, he was blurry, but from what she could see he seemed concerned.
She was hurt, that was probably why.
Caroline tried to talk; to say his name, but she only just managed parting her dry lips.
"Come here," he said, and lifted her into his arms.
He pressed her against his chest in a solid embrace and she tried to ignore the pain striking throughout her spine and brain.
Fuck, it hurt, and she couldn't even curse aloud.
Paralysed, she breathed the hybrid in, trying to make sense of anything. How had she gotten here? Where was she? What was Tyler doing here? Where was –
Tyler.
Terror shot through her veins as she remembered.
He'd snapped her neck.
More than once.
Hoarse squawks pierced her throat as she shoved aside the pain; pushed through the incapacitation to get him off her.
"Care," he protested.
"You snapped my neck!"
He let out a breath.
"I'm sorry. I didn't think you'd come with me any other way."
She glared. "It wasn't just once."
He winced.
"That wasn't my idea."
His eyes were downcast and he seemed hesitant before deciding to release her entirely, rocking back onto his knees.
"Can I help you up?"
"You can tell me what the hell is going on."
"Are you ok?"
She checked. Her vision having fully returned, she didn't see any blood anywhere, and the pain in her spine, neck and head had begun to ebb.
Shifting, she decided to risk standing.
Tyler hesitantly offered a hand and she narrowed her eyes at him then sighed and took it.
"You sure you're ok?"
"Pro tip, Tyler: if you want someone to be ok, don't snap their neck twenty times."
He let out another heavy breath, laced with guilt, as he led her over to a sofa. It was red and made of a cheap velvet-like material.
She was in a basement, she realised, and most of the décor was like the sofa – fancy-looking until further inspection. There were strange objects everywhere; on top of side tables and mismatched sofas.
"Where are we?" she asked, even though she had a slowly descending idea of the answer.
Tyler looked about to answer when his back suddenly straightened.
"She's coming."
Unthinkingly her posture mimicked his as footsteps became audible on the stairs outside the door.
Something was niggling at her mind, restlessly so. Her still-vaguely aching mind was desperate for her to remember something, but her consciousness refused to dig further.
Instead she watched as the doorknob turned and her body jolted, even though she wasn't surprised, when Adella stepped over the threshold.
If the blonde could've stood, she would've, but instead she just employed her dirtiest glare.
"What the hell is going on?"
The witch only smiled, gesturing towards the hybrid.
"Caroline, I believe you know Tyler?"
"Where am I?"
"A safe house." She folded her arms. "Silas is here, which makes keeping you at my house an unnecessary risk."
"Here? So we're still in New Orleans? And why did you kidnap me? I was coming to you willingly!"
Adella looked smug and her eyes roamed to meet Tyler's.
"Would you like to explain?"
Fury built up in her chest.
"No, you explain! Why did you drag Tyler into this?"
The witch looked even more amused. "He did more of the dragging, actually."
Surprised, her breath dropped out. Quickly her gaze darted to Tyler's back.
"T-tyler?"
Get there faster, Caroline, her brain begged.
He was silent for a moment before he turned to her.
His expression was that of a man struggling between two extreme positive and negative emotions.
"I did it, Care. I found it."
Her gaze darted between the two of them.
"Did… what? Found what?"
Finally, an expression won: joy.
"I'm going to kill him."
Numbness washed through her body, spreading like a fever as she finally remembered; finally knew what had sat at the back of her mind waiting to be dislodged.
You were meeting Adella with the White Oak stake.
They have the White Oak stake.
Quick as a whip the numbness disappeared and she frantically began searching herself, almost ripping her clothes from her body.
But her bag was gone and it, along with everything else, had been inside.
Without thinking she launched herself at the nearest target.
"Where is it?!" she screeched, clawing at Tyler's face.
He screamed, trying to push her off, and she only dug in deeper. Her vampire features emerged and she was preparing to fight when suddenly she was flung off him and everything blacked out once more.
She woke up on the floor. Again.
"You didn't have to hit her that hard," Tyler was admonishing.
She cracked open her eyes.
"Back in my day we said thank you," Adella responded dryly.
Tyler's hand was under her head, trying to lift it up. She could see the dried blood where she'd torn at his face. It only served to remind her.
"Get off me," she spat.
He frowned, but backed away, and she scrambled up into a sitting position.
"Can someone explain what the hell is going on?" she said, her voice low.
She'd trapped herself.
She needed Adella and was now past the point of no return. Even if she could escape, that would mean returning home, where Silas would eventually suss out that she'd been planning to kill him.
But now…
"I'm gonna kill him, Care," Tyler said again, in a tone she guessed was supposed to be soothing. "Everything's finally gonna go back to normal."
"You can't kill him." She lifted her eyes off the floor to glare at him. "You know that. He created our line."
He smiled lightly.
"That's what I found. A spell to separate him from us."
She drew a sharp breath as Adella nodded.
"He brought it to me. It worked out perfectly, actually. You wanted to kill Silas, which meant we'd get the blood and stake needed for killing the Abomination."
Oh, god.
She felt queasy, like she just might throw up, and with the last bit of her energy she rushed at Adella.
The witch saw her coming from a mile away.
With an almost bored flick of her hand a million jolts seemed to shoot up into Caroline's brain and she dropped to her knees, grasping her head.
"Adella, stop!" Tyler demanded.
After a few seconds it did, and tears unrelated to the pain began to roll down Caroline's cheeks.
Oh god, oh no. What had she done?
"Please," she begged, folding in on herself. "Please don't do this."
"Caroline."
Tyler sounded confused but she couldn't care about him right now. That was until he spoke again.
"Why do you care this much? Last time I saw you, you ripped out Hayley's heart. What do you care if we kill Klaus? He's done much worse than Hayley, you know that."
She froze entirely. She didn't breathe; willed her heart not to beat.
He didn't know.
"You aren't aware," Adella noted too, in surprise. "I thought you were."
Forcing herself to look up, she saw Tyler look from the witch to her then back.
"Know what?"
"The Original Abomination finally chose a mate."
Tyler shook his head, perplexed, and Adella pointedly looked at the blonde.
It took a second for Tyler to get it as Caroline's heart sped.
His eyes widened.
"No."
Feeling the strangest kind of shame, she looked away.
"Care, tell me she's lying!"
The silence was thick and awkward.
Shoving down guilt and shame, Caroline cleared her throat, looking up at Adella.
"You're supposed to protect the balance."
"Care," Tyler begged.
She ignored him.
"That's your job."
For the first time the witch looked ruffled.
"I'm still doing my job, vampire. We're still going to kill Silas. We'll do it first, just to be sure. But then it's your boyfriend's turn." She smiled toothily. "Think of it as killing two murderers with one stone."
She turned to leave and Caroline found herself crying out, pleading.
"Please! Please don't do this, I'll do anything. Anything you want!"
She felt Tyler's stare on her but ignored it as Adella slowly turned back to face her.
"Please," she begged softly, tears streaming down her face. "I can get you anything you want."
The witch stared at her, long and hard, before uttering a sound of disgust.
"I wanted Davina. But your abomination ensured that will never happen. I'm settling for his death."
Davina?
It took her a second to remember.
The witches wanted me to infiltrate Marcel's inner circle and obtain his trust. I didn't know it at the time, but their slow-winded approach was because they wanted to get Davina back.
"Klaus did that to save witches!"
Adella snarled. "He did that because he's a greedy son of a bitch."
She shook her head. "Vera –"
"Was the perfect cover; the perfect excuse," the witch spat. "The perfect way to get everything he wanted, plus all the witches on his side afterward, despite him going against our plan."
Caroline looked desperately from the witch to Tyler – who was watching Adella as if she were preaching the gospel – and back again, realising that there was no way to talk sense into her.
Adella thought Klaus was pure evil – even his purest intentions, from her perspective, were sullied. And there was nothing Caroline could do to change that. Even her own best friend had taken weeks to begin considering that there was good inside Klaus.
The only way to fix this was with her death.
With the last of her energy Caroline reared up again and darted toward Adella.
A grunt escaped her lips when she unceremoniously clunked straight into seemingly nothing.
"What the – "
"Boundary spell," Adella explained, some measure of her smugness gone. "I put it up while you were out and have been behind it since your little stunt just now." She looked at Tyler. "You two play nice. And get to bringing her around."
Then she turned and left the room, Caroline's energy leaving with her.
The blonde slumped to the floor and Tyler glanced up worriedly from where he was nursing a healing arm on the sofa. She must've done more damage than she'd realised.
"Are you ok?"
"Fine," she bit out.
Reaching out, she cursed under her breath, testing the boundary. From what she could tell, it split the room right down the middle, keeping her away from Tyler.
Slumping over, Caroline finally began to take full stock of her physical state.
She was shaking from head to toe. Her body was wracking with sobs so hard she couldn't think straight.
There was only one more thing…
"Tyler," she looked up, eyes wide, "please."
He looked bewildered that she'd addressed him willingly, his spine straightening again even as confusion entered his features.
"Please don't do this. She can't do it without you."
His eyes widened and it ached. This was rock bottom; there was nowhere lower she could go.
"You know what he did." His eyes were wild. "How can you ask me that?"
"God, I don't – I don't know, Tyler." There was nothing else, that was why. "I know it's not fair, it's just… if you ever loved me, you won't do this. Please."
If she could've heard how pathetic the desperation sounded in her own voice, it would've made her cringe. As it was, she only heard her own sobs; saw him through the blurry vision of her own tears.
He stared at her, and maybe it was because she couldn't see him straight, but for a second he seemed to consider it.
Then his jaw clenched.
"The Caroline I knew – the girl I loved – never would've asked me that. I'm not doing this… impostor any favours." He turned away, too disgusted to look at her. "There's a bathroom through there."
She removed any traces left of her makeup.
Leaving the tap running, she cried till there was nothing left. She splashed at her face then drank some.
She felt sick but couldn't bring herself to hurl.
She felt cold; numb. Properly so, this time. The water didn't feel like water. It was almost like right after she'd transitioned, when she'd had to become accustomed to being able to note the temperature of something, yet remain completely unaffected by it. Water was either cold or hot, but neither really mattered. She could pour boiling or ice water into her eyes and it would be all the same.
Now she registered it as some liquid that was supposed to be refreshing, but she didn't feel it.
The basin her hand was clenched around was icy cold – a rarity, for something to be colder than her skin. Unyielding, it helped slightly with the waves of what felt like nausea.
She'd found a way to make her knees carry her weight and, most importantly, she'd found a way to stop thinking.
She closed her eyes and opened them, repeatedly, in evenly timed periods, not thinking about anything but opening and closing her eyes.
Maybe that was why her dad had been able to train himself to resist compulsion – they were so bad at not thinking, but excellent at training their thinking on just one thing.
She evened her breathing.
Except –
Thinking about her dad made her think of Tyler.
The shame she'd felt when he looked at her had reminded her of something. She hadn't been able to place it, then, but now she recognised it.
It was how she'd felt when her father had first found out she was a vampire.
The way he'd looked at her had revolted even her.
She'd never been so disgusted by herself before, not even when Damon had treated her like garbage. There was something about being looked at like that by her own father – the man she trusted and loved more than anyone on this earth – that had stuck with her indelibly. His utter disgust and disappointment had carved its way into her soul and there was no getting rid of it.
Somebody hating you to the core of who you were – it wasn't a sensation you forgot.
That's how Tyler had looked at her. Because she loved Klaus.
Open. Closed.
Open. Closed. In. Open. Closed. Out. Open. Closed. In.
She breathed, trying to push the thought out.
And for a second she thought –
Humanity switch
No. No.
In. Open. Closed. Out. Open. Closed. In.
If Klaus died it would her fault. All her fault. She couldn't leave well enough alone; she'd wanted to kill Silas.
But she'd wanted to save the world.
Didn't she deserve more than this for that?
Instead it had become a choice: humanity or Klaus. And she hadn't chosen Klaus.
Deep breath.
God, what would she do without him? How would she live knowing she'd killed him? How would she live knowing she'd killed the man she loved; the only man who had cared about nothing but her?
Humanity or Klaus.
It had seemed like such an easy choice. Perhaps because his life hadn't been on the line, then. But now, looking through his eyes…
She imagined looking through his eyes; seeing the way he looked at her. If their roles had been reversed he never would've chosen anything but her. Because over and over he'd only chosen her.
I am beholden to you above all. Not whoever doles out threats, no matter what those threats might be.
And if her life had been in danger he wouldn't have been weak, like her.
He would've escaped; snapped the witch's neck. He would've found her. He would've found a way to save her. He wouldn't be cowering in a bathroom, depleted and drained to depression.
But she wasn't an Original.
She was just her, Caroline. The one from whom choices were taken.
This should've felt familiar to her.
She staggered out of the bathroom and Tyler jumped up when she almost fell.
She reached for a wall, though, steadying herself.
"You don't look good," he noted grimly.
She ignored him.
She didn't quite know what to say – what was there to say? All she wanted to do was curl into a ball and never move again.
"Care, don't."
Confused, she looked up, meeting his eyes. He looked worried sick and she realised how bad she must look.
"Don't, what?"
"Don't do this to yourself. Please. Don't give up. You don't give up."
"Don't give up? Are you kidding me? You're holding me hostage and telling me not to give up?"
The words were argumentative but her tone was flat; empty. She had given up.
"I mean –" He seemed to wrestle with himself then shook his head. "This isn't your fault. And this isn't who you are."
Making her way to the sofa opposite him, she scoffed, also emptily.
"Why do you care, Tyler? I'm an impostor, remember?"
There was silence as she sat.
When she met his eyes again they were riddled with remorse.
"I didn't mean that."
He'd heard her breakdown.
Damn hybrid hearing.
"Don't feel sorry for me."
"I don't… I'm… scared." He sighed and it broke in the middle. "I-I've never seen you like this."
She felt tired. She didn't want to do this with him.
"You wouldn't understand."
He sighed again, looking away.
She wiped away a stray tear and then he looked back at her and she almost gasped at the look in his eyes.
They were filled with so much sincerity; so much –
He was still in love with her, she realised with a jolt.
"I wish I could."
He meant it.
He really did wish he could understand.
Her bond with Klaus made absolutely no sense to him. He didn't and couldn't get why this was breaking her from the inside out. Klaus was supposed to be the monster. Tyler was the one she was supposed to love.
Something tore inside her.
She'd hurt him.
And what he was doing… it made sense, to him. Perhaps it would make sense to her, too, if she wasn't in love with Klaus.
Tyler wasn't the bad guy here.
A thick heavy silence descended and Caroline was glad for it. She didn't want to talk anymore. She knew there would be questions and she didn't want to have to answer them.
Half because she still felt empty and robbed of herself, and half because – and maybe this was strange considering that she'd attacked him not that long ago, but – she didn't want to hurt Tyler.
He must've been morbidly curious about her and Klaus, now that he'd gotten over the initial shock, but he didn't deserve to get his heart stomped on by her – which was exactly what the details of her and Klaus' relationship would do to him.
But then he broke the silence and she winced.
"Do you know when I first met Klaus?"
She looked up, surprised by the question.
"No."
He sounded thoughtful.
"…It was right after we both met Rebekah."
She cast her mind back, trying to force her way through the dull ache in her brain to access her memories.
Then, all at once, it hit her.
Her and Tyler making out on Senior Prank Night. The female Original taunting them before attacking her.
"She took you to him…?"
"Yeah," he nodded. "Into the gym. Bonnie, Elena and Matt were already being held hostage. She passed me off to him and all I really registered what that he was some British prick. Elena was terrified of him."
She closed her eyes. She hadn't been there but she knew what must have happened next.
"I didn't remember this till a lot later. But he threatened them. I was his leverage for Bonnie to find out what was happening to his hybrids."
There was silence and after a few moments she opened her eyes.
He met them dead on and she realised he'd been waiting for her to.
"And then he killed me."
She swallowed, guilt bubbling over as she remembered standing over his body in the lab. Rebekah telling her he'd only be ok if Bonnie found a way to keep Klaus' hybrids from dying.
She'd been so scared. But she'd known that she would have to assure him; tell him that he would be ok when he woke up.
Caroline knew why he was telling her this.
To him, Klaus had never been even slightly good or redeemable. He'd never seen the sides of him she had. The only time he'd liked Klaus was when he'd been sired to him, something he'd had to break his own bones over and over again to put a stop to.
He didn't have to search for reasons to hate Klaus. Since the very moment they'd met it had been set in stone.
"How long?"
His words cut through the silence again and once again she winced, struggling to breathe.
"Tyler, don't do this to yourself."
"How long?"
She looked down at her nails then sighed.
"We didn't get together till after you left."
He laughed humourlessly. "So you were just waiting till I was out of the way."
She didn't look up or say anything – didn't deny it.
"Are you fucking kidding me!?"
She swallowed, looking up; noted his hurt expression.
"You wanted me gone, that's all you were waiting for?"
"I wanted to be with him, Tyler. I was gonna break up with you when you came back after graduation…"
"But then he left."
His eyes had gone cold, even as hurt and confusion still flitted through them.
She nodded. "And… I decided to make it work."
"And did it, Care? Work?" he bit out.
She knew he meant it sarcastically but she shook her head anyway.
"After we had that fight and you took me to the Grill, I was gonna break up with you. But then you said that you needed me and I… couldn't." She sighed, re-living everything that had happened that night. "But that didn't erase everything else."
"You mean Klaus."
Vehemently she shook her head again. "No. I wanted to break up with you because of us, Tyler. Yes, Klaus played some role, but it wasn't what you think, he just… he made me realise that I wanted more, and deserved better."
"So now it's my fault?" His eyes burned.
Caroline looked back down at her hands, allowing a few beats of silence that would hopefully dissipate his anger.
"You didn't even discuss not going to Whitmore with me."
He scoffed. "Yeah, I bet Klaus is a real decision-discusser."
Her head whipped to him. "This isn't about Klaus, Tyler! This is about us! This is about you leaving whenever you felt like it! This is about you putting some werewolves before me, more than once! This is about you going behind my back to help a woman who snapped my neck!"
Her chest heaved and she wished she could take her last words back.
She shouldn't have brought up Hayley, not after what she'd done to her and forced Tyler to bear witness to.
But it was too late.
Tyler stared back at her with an unreadable expression and she averted her gaze.
"You made a plan that would force me to leave my home and my mother and you didn't think to consult me about it," she reminded, bitterly remembering that revelation. "This is about us always sweeping our problems under the rug; having sex instead of talking. We didn't work, Tyler, and that's something Klaus made me realise but that he had no part in."
"Did you love me?"
She looked up in surprise. "Of course."
"When you wanted to be with him?"
She felt tears sting at her eyes. She didn't want to be having this conversation.
In a way she supposed he deserved it, more than he knew, because of everything that had happened between her and Klaus while she'd still technically been with Tyler. But it hurt. And it hurt to know how much it was hurting him.
She shifted, leaning her back against the armrest so she could bring her feet up onto the sofa.
"Yeah," she answered softly.
Caroline wrapped her arms around her knees, looking dead ahead. She wished Adella could've held her hostage in a room separate to Tyler.
"Were you sleeping with him?"
"No," she answered immediately, having expected the question.
"Did you want to?"
That was harder. She remembered being on her sofa with Klaus, pulling his shirt off him and reaching for his buckle; his body against hers and his thumbs pressing into her hipbones.
"Yes."
There was a loud crash but she didn't look to see the source of it. Knowing Tyler had knocked something over in anger was enough.
She couldn't even consider telling him about anything that had actually happened between them.
"I'm sorry, Tyler."
There was silence for a minute before he spoke again.
"The thought of him touching you makes me sick."
He did sound repulsed and she pulled a hand through her hair, unsure about what to say.
The thought of Klaus touching her made her want to cry. In this moment it was all she wanted, even if he were here with her right now in the same screwed up situation.
She wanted him to wrap her up into his safe arms and whisper into her ear that he loved her before kissing the back of her neck.
"I still can't… believe you're with him. He killed her, Caroline!"
Blinking away the tears that had developed in the corner of her eyes, she turned to look at him.
"I know Tyler, and I'm so sorry."
"Don't do that," Tyler swallowed, looking nauseous. "Don't apologise for him."
"I'm not. I'm apologising to you."
He frowned and she hastily continued.
"You lost your mother and that was awful. But I didn't plan to fall for him and I promise you, I fought against it so hard – maybe I'm just a terrible person, because it didn't work." She took a deep breath. "And I know that it's not fair. But I love him, and yes, I'm sorry."
He was staring at her, his eyes hard and filled with something that scared her. For one second while she'd spoken she thought she'd seen forgiveness behind them, but now all that was gone.
"I didn't lose my mother, Caroline. She was murdered in cold blood. And you're fucking her murderer."
She was sitting on a cold hard floor, her legs crossed.
Her head popped up and she looked around in confusion.
There was a floor but she wasn't inside a room. Everything around her was dark smoke, she couldn't see walls anywhere.
Her eyes inspected the floor but it was some indistinct type of black marble.
Hearing footsteps in front of her, her head popped up again.
She grinned widely.
"Bonnie!"
She was on her feet in a second and in the next she was on her friend.
Bonnie laughed loudly as they embraced each other tightly.
"Oh my god, Bon," she said, strengthening her hold.
"You have no idea how good it feels to touch someone," Bonnie sighed into the hug. "Even if that someone is holding you way too tightly," she laughed.
"Oh my god, Bon," Caroline repeated, the only thing she could think of saying.
Then, registering Bonnie's words, she released her a little.
"How are you doing this? I'm dreaming, right?"
"Yeah," Bonnie nodded against her shoulder. "I had to talk to so many witches, and one of them taught me a few things," she boasted with a smile before frowning and beginning disentangle herself from the blonde. "But I don't have long."
Caroline was reluctant to let go of her friend, but she moved away to glance into the witch's face that was now filled with worry.
Suddenly everything came crashing back to her – Adella and her plan to kill Klaus.
"Bonnie, they're gonna kill him!" she yelled, panic rising in her chest anew.
The witch's face twisted.
"I know. I'm sorry, Care, she must've been using something so I couldn't see what she was up to. Burning sage, maybe, I don't know."
Caroline bit at her lip. "At least you warned me that she was hella shady."
Bonnie would've laughed at her best friend's phrasing if not for the gravity of the situation.
"Is it enough?"
The blonde's brows furrowed. "That's what I was gonna ask you."
Bonnie's face fell, catching Caroline's meaning, and she took a step back with her eyes cast to the ground.
"I don't know, Care."
What felt like a black hole started up in Caroline's stomach. She wanted to throw up but she felt empty – less than.
"So you're saying her spell will work – Klaus could die?"
Reluctantly Bonnie lifted her head to meet Caroline's eyes.
"I think so."
The black hole felt like it was going to eat her alive.
She couldn't believe she'd done this; this was all her fault. She'd sought out Adella and begged her to go along with her plan – she'd taken Klaus to his death.
Bonnie watched as Caroline began to hyperventilate, her chest rising and falling rapidly as she pulled her hands over her face then through her hair.
"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god," she kept repeating through shallow breaths.
Bonnie, silent, felt awful. She should've seen all this coming or found some way to stop it. She hadn't even known that Tyler was involved until it was too late.
The blonde turned away, still in hysterics, and Bonnie stepped forward to wrap her arms around her.
"Caroline, it's going to be fine, ok? The plan is good."
Bonnie's words seemed to come to her through a haze, but eventually they registered and she nodded.
"The plan. The plan," she repeated, trying to even her breathing.
She pulled Bonnie's arms tighter around her as she bit at her lip.
"It can go so wrong so easily, though."
"It won't. You have to believe that or you won't make it through all this."
Hearing the words, Caroline realised her best friend was right. She needed to stay strong and focus, or this was all going to go down the drain before it even had a chance.
"You're right," she nodded, gulping in a long breath of air. "You're right, I'm fine."
"Ok," Bonnie nodded, taking a step back.
Caroline turned to face the witch again and she couldn't help it, her thoughts wandered to Klaus.
"Bonnie, can you… can you see him?"
Immediately understanding her friend's request, Bonnie closed her eyes and concentrated for a few moments before snapping her eyes back open.
"No."
"You're lying."
"Caroline, it's not good. He's spiralling," Bonnie pleaded, shifting uncomfortably.
"Tell me."
The witch sighed, not meeting Caroline's eyes.
"When he got to town Klaus killed a lot of people. He's shutting everyone out; he's hurt Matt and Rebekah. Not even Elijah can get through to him. Caroline…" She shifted some more, clearly trying to figure out how best to phrase something. "He's not… well."
Caroline swore, looking away as tears started up.
"It's all my fault."
"Caroline, don't – " Bonnie started, reaching for her hand.
But she pulled back. "Don't, Bonnie. Please don't. Tyler's mom may not be up to me to apologise for, but all the blood Klaus shed after I left is on me. I knew this would happen; god, I planned it!"
The easiest way to get Silas to New Orleans had been to get Klaus here. And the only sure-fire way to get Klaus here despite Silas' ban on him leaving Mystic Falls, was for her to disappear.
Klaus would think she'd been kidnapped – which she could almost snort at – how morbidly funny was it that she'd actually gotten kidnapped? – and rush here no matter what.
She'd known he would be angry; out for blood. It was a risk she'd decided to take.
Dozens of people had died because of that decision.
Not knowing what to say, the witch stayed silent.
"Is that all?" Caroline asked, trying to even her tone, but her voice was thick with tears.
Bonnie nodded. She didn't really have any more news.
"Yeah. I'll come by to discuss the details soon, so make sure to keep getting some sleep, ok?"
Caroline nodded, sniffing, and concern tugged painfully at Bonnie's nerves.
"Hey, Care," she said, putting a hand to the blonde's arm.
She looked up, her eyes tortured and full of tears.
"Don't forget about the seven billion you're saving."
"Hey!" someone said, shaking her violently. "Hey!"
Caroline opened her eyes to see Tyler standing over her, his hands on her as he shook rapidly.
Quickly she shrank away from his touch, cringing into the depths of the sofa as she tried to re-adjust to her surroundings.
"What are you doing?"
"You were crying in your sleep," he explained. "Pretty violently."
She let out a breath, the memories from the dream experience coming back to her.
With the back of her hand she wiped at her soaking wet face, trying to cringe further back into the sofa even though there was nowhere left to go.
She remembered now – she'd fallen asleep, exhausted from their conversation, with her knees still pulled up against her and her head lolling onto the headrest.
"Yeah, that would be because you're gonna kill the man I love," she snapped.
Tyler stepped back in surprise then stared down at her for a few seconds in disappointment, clenching his jaw.
Finally he sighed and drew away altogether, gesturing towards a table near the door that held two plates and a cup.
"Adella brought us food."
"And took down the division spell," she noted tersely.
Tyler nodded.
"I said we were ok."
He took up a plate and cup, handing the former to her and placing the latter on the side table next to her. Then he took up his own food and sat back on his sofa.
"Are we?"
The ghost of a smile appeared on his lips. "Unless you're gonna attack me again, yeah."
She smiled a little too then looked down at her food. It was a sandwich – cold meat and lettuce on brown bread. Deciding it didn't look inviting enough, Caroline put it aside to inspect the contents of the cup.
Expecting it to be coffee, she felt giddy when she noticed that the liquid inside was thicker.
"Thank god," she muttered before putting the cup to her lips hungrily, the veins creeping up to her eyes.
Until the blood hit her tongue.
She pulled the cup back swiftly, coughing in disgust.
"What the hell is that?"
Tyler shrugged. "Cat?"
Caroline wrinkled her nose. "Seriously! If I'd known I was gonna be forced into the Stefan Diet, I would've packed some blood," she complained.
Tyler looked amused as he sipped at his own and she sighed dramatically before holding her nose and downing the contents of the cup quickly.
It was hardly enough – the cup had only been half full – and the gross taste still clung to her tongue. Still, it was at least a little satisfying considering she hadn't had any blood for a while.
It made her feel slightly less on edge; less like she wanted to rip Tyler's neck off.
Clanging the cup down back onto the table, she grabbed for the plate with her sandwich in it. It still looked less than appetising but the less than satisfying blood had revved her appetite.
She took two quick bites of it and swallowed then pulled a face.
"This is foul. I could make a better sandwich with both eyes closed and a hand tied behind my back."
Tyler chuckled, his eyes gleaming. "You can do a lot of things, Care," he said, his tone seemingly proud, but he ducked his head before she could read what he'd meant. "Hey, remember when it was your mom's turn to make sandwiches for the team?"
She was caught off guard by the memory, but there was no doubt that she remembered it.
"Yeah." Caroline smiled. "You all thought that just because she couldn't cook more than five meals, her sandwiches would be bad."
"They were kickass," Tyler laughed.
Caroline's smile widened and they both went back to eating, her constant wish that the sandwich would at some point begin tasting better never coming true.
She wondered just how many times Tyler had snapped her neck; how long it had been since she'd been kidnapped. Hours? Days?
"Tyler, can I ask you something?" she asked after a minute.
He looked up curiously. "Sure."
"…Did anything ever happen between you and Hayley?"
He frowned at the question then looked away, seemingly uncomfortable.
It took him a few seconds but finally, sighing, he replied.
"Transitioning is…" he cleared his throat, "weird. I mean, you of all people know."
"There's a lot of nudity involved," Caroline put in, nodding.
He didn't smile. She wondered if those memories of the beginning of their relationship were as painful for him as they were for her.
She didn't regret their relationship, but she wished she'd seen sooner that it had been based solely on mutually coming to grips with being supernatural creatures in a human world. Not the most superficial of reasons, but not the most durable foundation for an eternal relationship, either.
Maybe if she hadn't been so uncertain, hadn't still been scrambling for self-esteem and relationship security, she would've seen how little they really had in common.
She was Caroline Forbes. Mistakes glowed and burned, so much they hurt. And her and Tyler went down as one of her biggest ones.
Tyler sighed again then continued.
"She helped me and she was into me and some stuff happened, but she knew I loved you and I never slept with her," he promised sincerely.
Slowly she nodded.
"Thanks for being honest."
There were two more bites left of her sandwich and as much as she hated it, she didn't want it to finish. Her stomach was all but growling and her fangs were itching at her gums with the need to push out and into someone's jugular.
"Tyler, you're gonna have to talk to Adella. I need more."
"Blood or food?"
"Food. And human blood."
Tyler sighed heavily, shrugging. "Look, I feel the same way you do. But I think that was her way of saying that she isn't going to be draining anyone for us."
"Then she can break into a freaking blood bank," Caroline snapped. "I need the blood. Unless she plans on staking Silas."
Tyler blinked. "What?"
"Animal blood weakens us, Tyler. And I need to be at full capacity to take on Silas."
He stared at her for a few seconds, understanding dawning. "And I'll need to be, to kill Klaus."
Wincing, she looked away, and he sighed.
"I'll talk to her."
Caroline nodded but didn't look back at him, going back to staring at the last bits of her sandwich. She was trying to think of a strategy to make those last two bites last as long as possible when she realised that Tyler was staring at her.
"What?" she asked, looking up.
"You know he doesn't love you, right?"
She sighed. "Can we not do this? I'm a kidnapped hungry vampire – I'm not in the best mood right now, Tyler."
With that she swallowed the bread whole, placed the plate on the table and curled up with her knees pulled up and her back to him. She laid on the headrest, wondering if she could get back to sleep. It was the only thing that would make her stop thinking about the hunger.
Tyler's blood was pumping loudly through his veins, taunting her, and she was doing all she could not to flash across the distance and take her fill. But he might bite her too, in shocked retaliation, and then their entire plan would be shot to hell.
And then there was the fact that thinking about Tyler's hybrid blood made her think of her hybrid and his blood.
The taste, colour and consistency all came rushing back at her, complete with memories of him atop her, moving animalistically as she dropped her fangs into his neck and drank until she was sated, shooting her right over that edge.
"He's using you, Care. He's playing some kind of game and you're the most fun part of it, because he obviously has you completely fooled."
She tried to let her memories with Klaus drown out Tyler's voice, but unfortunately she had to pull away from them in order to control the bloodlust, causing her ex's voice to ring in her ears.
"That day I went to his house to ask him to look after you – I told him that I knew he had feelings for you and he said he didn't know what I was talking about."
Caroline frowned. Neither hybrid had told her about this part of the conversation before.
But she didn't react, keeping her back still, and Tyler continued.
"That guy? That was the real Klaus, Caroline. Whatever he tells you; whoever he pretends to be with you, that's all it is – pretending."
She almost wanted to laugh, bitterly, remembering Silas trying to play with her head; make her believe these same things. How close she'd come to doing so. How her friends weren't that different from the monster of the week even if they couldn't see it.
She turned to look at the dark-haired hybrid.
"Tyler, I know you're trying to look out for me and that you think you're right. But listen to me: you can say anything about my feelings, or the things he's done, or what he would do."
The way she'd caught him looking at her when they'd begun dancing at his family's Ball.
The first time she'd told him she loved him.
He's spiralling.
His face when she'd assured him that she forgave him for keeping Silas a secret.
You are the first and last person I will ever say this to, Caroline Forbes. I love you.
"You can say anything – but there is nothing in this whole entire world that could ever make me doubt that Klaus loves me."
Not again.
Tyler looked hurt, but she didn't care. That was one thing she would never question ever again.
And now she was getting him killed.
Caroline looked away, swallowing heavily as she tried to push the panic down.
"Your feelings?"
Oh, god. Trust that to have been the thing Tyler took away.
"You don't think you really love him, do you?"
She scoffed. "I never said that."
"Look, Care, I get that there were… problems between us, but we can sort those out. I still… I still love you," he sighed, regarding her with wide sincere eyes. "We can still be together."
She looked at him sharply before shaking her head in bitter amusement.
"The person you love doesn't exist anymore, Tyler. I'm different, you know that – you've seen it."
His eyes flickered with uncertainty for a moment before he shook his head.
"I've seen what he turned you into because of the way he tangled you up in his… twisted freaking web. But you don't have to be someone else to be with me, Care. You can just be you; you don't have to be scared."
Her eyes searched his as she considered it.
Life with Tyler would be an easier one. Yes, things between them had been difficult to handle and painful at times, but it had definitely been easier than this.
Love could be measured, she'd learned. Not with any instrument, but against the happiness and the pain; the ecstasy. With Tyler she'd existed. With Klaus she soared.
Tyler could make her happy, she was sure of that – if not the kind she'd become accustomed to then the generic kind; the ones humans ascribed to. Maybe they could work through the problems and the distrust because they really did love each other.
The way she loved him was automatic; a remnant of a time long since gone but not forgotten by her heart – they shared memories, like her mother making sandwiches for his team.
And the way he loved her was similar – unthinking; hopeful. In her he saw a future even if he didn't know why.
But Klaus knew. Klaus knew that her eyes were globes and her heart glowed with the light to take them anywhere; that her feet were the ones to take thousands of steps with.
Klaus' love for her was all-encompassing and impossible to eradicate; etched into his bones. He'd tried to stop it and still it was all that plagued his mind – she was impossible to turn off. His love wasn't unthinking, it wasn't light. It was permanent and wielded as a personality trait. It was twisted and dark – twisted into his very nature: werewolf, vampire and human; dark in its indelibility.
There is no allure to darkness – a lie told by a different person a million years ago.
But she couldn't explain that to Tyler – a simple man in many ways. She couldn't explain that she wanted the darkness and the soaring and the blood and the ecstasy. She couldn't explain that she wasn't scared – she was herself.
She couldn't explain that she wanted Klaus. That she wanted him and that she couldn't care about the rest – the convenience or easy happiness that choosing against him would mean.
So she said something else instead.
"I'm different," she uttered again, hoping to make him understand at least some part of it.
But again the hybrid shook his head, refusing to believe the truth; the true Caroline she'd unearthed.
"That's not true and I can prove it." He stared at her. "Klaus may have you wrapped around his finger, but I know you'd do the right thing when it came down to it."
"What are you talking about?" she frowned, confused.
"If it was a life or death situation, like it's going to be – if Silas had both of us and you could only save one – me or Klaus – what would you do?"
Caroline's mouth parted in surprise. Then she shook her head, looking down.
"You can't ask me that, Tyler."
After a minute he spoke again: "It's ok, you don't have to answer – like I said, I know what you'd do."
Her head rose sharply and he met her questioning look.
"After everything he's done, Care, after everything he's done, only a monster could choose him."
She was breathless; couldn't speak if she'd wanted to.
"And you may think you love one but that doesn't mean you're one. You aren't a monster, Care; that's not you."
He seemed so confident, so sure of himself. That was Tyler, she supposed, but it scratched at her nerves and she looked away again, his question bouncing and echoing through her mind.
Who would she save?
She wanted to be able to say Klaus doubtlessly, but at the end of the day she did love them both. And she may not have been in love with Tyler, but it was undeniable that in most ways he was the better man. She could see Tyler's logic – in a way, letting him die to save Klaus would be something only a monster could do.
But that didn't solve her dilemma. All things being equal – Klaus not being the maker of their line of vampires, as he would be rendered by the spell Tyler had found – who would she let die?
Caroline shivered. She had no answer. All she could do was hope that it wouldn't come to that.
After another few minutes of silence Tyler finally took a deep breath before addressing her again, this time all business: "Look, I need you to teach me your Silas-thing."
Please let me know if you liked it! Thank you; love you!
Next: All the shit goes down.
