Terrible Woman

(11/23/14)


Sometimes you end up with the wrong person, sometimes you just think you ended up with the right person, but eventually the illusion vanishes and you just know. Sakura knows this every morning when she wakes up beside a man who's never made her heart skip a beat, a man who she's never really loved as she's pretended to.

He's an unhappy man she knows, with everything one would want in life but yet every time he looks at her he smiles like he knows.

They weren't meant to be.

And it's both their faults, they're lying to themselves, they're lying to each other and they know it.

Sakura relishes the moments she's out of the house, the moments she's out of his sight. She stops by the cemetery often, a single flower in her hand as she sits in the steps looking over all the graves but visiting none at all.

Late at night the cemetery's empty, she holds on to the flower and speaks to a grave that's not there, to a name that's not engraved, but to a man that's long since dead.

"I'm paying for it Sasuke-kun…and I'm dragging him with me. Some days I think I saved you, others I think I should have tried harder, maybe if I had things would be different today." She smiles sadly.

She remains in silence then. She doesn't know how much time goes by but after a while she wipes away a tear and just stands and leaves. She'll visit the next day and the next and the next. Throwing away the daffodil in her hands in the trashcan she makes her way out the cemetery.

She doesn't rush back home, even though it's late, there's no one waiting for her there. Her husband is in his office too busy being Hokage to pretend their marriage is not a wreck. She knows he's with Hinata working, he knows his feelings for her are growing stronger with every day that goes by, but she also knows that he would never betray her.

Sometimes she wishes he would, sometimes she wants him to end the joke that is their marriage so at least he could find happiness.

She walks aimlessly through the village not wanting to come back to a home that has turned into a prison. She knows Sasuke wherever he is must hate her, but she doesn't blame him because she hates herself.

She hates what she's become, a woman who lies to herself and to those around her, a woman who pretends she's happy and forces a smile on her face when all she wants to do is cry.

What no one knows is that Sakura was already gone by the time she ended Sasuke's life.

"Have you flipped? I just switched from Sasuke to you… They say a woman's heart is as changeable as the autumn sky, don't they…?" Lies, lies, lies.

"Sakura-chan…" He smiled. He knew it was a lie and he took it anyway.

"I'm so sorry Sasuke." Tears streamed down her face as she held him close never wanting to let go.

Sometimes she thinks about the 'what if's', most of the times she blames herself for everything. She's a terrible woman who lives in the past clinging to things she can't change.

"And maybe things that day could have turned out differently."


a/n: Inspired by an interview from Kishimoto in where he said that Sakura would be a terrible woman if she just switched to Naruto while still loving Sasuke. The interview was basically about the chapter of the fake confession towards Naruto.

As for those of you who asked, why 'Sarada' honestly I don't know. It's the name Kishi chose for their adorable little daughter which basically means Salad. Many joke that it's because he wanted to name her tomato and Sakura didn't let him so they compromised on Salad. xD

Anyway, let me know what you think. :)