Chapter 50
In the center of the yard was the ceremonial gazebo where the wedding was in mid-ceremony. On the left under the gazebo was the priest, in the center was the couple, Christy Peters and Jeevan Amand, both in traditional Indian dress. Buffy was sitting in the back with her 11 month old daughter looking around for her cousins. She and Angel had been down in Sunnydale and Los Angeles visiting their friends. Buffy had left early that morning to make it to Christy's wedding and Angel would have Paige or Leo orb down and get him later.
"We have come together on this glorious day to wed Christy and Jeevan, who are here to build the foundation of their marriage upon the earth in the presence of the sacred fire and among their family and friends."
Buffy looked down at Alex sitting on the chair next to her. She was sitting quietly, playing with her little cardboard book. Her daughter was one of the most well behaved kids she'd ever known. When Alex finally realized her mother's attention was on her, she looked up and smiled. "Mama."
Buffy heard a car drive up and looked back. Leo drove the SUV up the driveway and the valet opened the car doors.
"Oh, we are so late. Has the ceremony started?" Phoebe groaned.
"Yes, ma'am." The valet said as Leo handed him the keys and took the ticket in return.
"Oh, no. I told you to just go ahead and go." Piper said as she got Chris out of the back seat while Phoebe and Leo got the stroller out of the back of the SUV.
"Yeah, well, I don't understand why you couldn't leave the baby with Paige." Phoebe said.
"When you're a mother, you'll understand."
"Yeah, that's assuming I'm gonna have any eggs left." Phoebe struggled with the stroller. "How do you do this thing?"
"Here." Buffy said. She had walked over to meet them with Alex in her arms.
"Hey!" Phoebe hugged her tightly. With one hand, Buffy opened the stroller with ease.
"Oh. It's gonna be so nice to have a Slayer around the house again!"
"What, a man around the house isn't working?"
Phoebe looked a Leo sheepishly. "Oh, it is nice."
"Yeah. Except I think I should still be after Barbas." Leo said.
"Not until you can distinguish between a demon and an Elder. You're stuck with us."
Piper got her cell phone out and dialed. "Paige? Hi!"
Phoebe turned and looked at Piper, shocked. "What are you doing? Give me that." She took the cell phone from Piper. "What are you doing?"
"What do you mean what am I doing? I'm checking on Wyatt."
Phoebe turned the phone off. "You just checked on Wyatt. Have you guys thought about seeing a shrink?"
"Yeah. We did that." Piper finally noticed Buffy and Alex. "Hi! Welcome back."
"Thanks."
"Hi Alex!" Phoebe took her niece from Buffy and hugged her tightly.
"Say hi aunt Phoebe."
"I," Alex said. "Bebe."
"Oh!"
"She's talking so clear!" Piper said. "Hi, sweetie." She kissed Alex on her cheek.
"E-o!" Alex said, leaning out of Phoebe's arms to be held by Leo.
"Yeah, we've been working on it." Buffy said, watching her daughter. "She's so smart! Most babies don't learn names this early."
Phoebe grabbed a couple of wedding programs off of the unattended reception table and gave one to Piper and Leo pushed the stroller onto the sidewalk toward them. "Ok, look, I know you haven't been out of the house in a very, very long time, but this is Christy's wedding, so please try to have fun." Phoebe said.
Piper looked at the illustrated couple on the program cover. "Is this a wedding or an orgy?"
"It's a Hindu ceremony. It's supposed to be very, very, very romantic."
Chris started crying. "Oh. See? I knew this would happen. This is over-stimulation. We gotta get out of here." She turned to wave to the valet as their car was driven off to be parked. "Hey! Excuse me! Wait!"
"No, no. No, no. You know what? You guys go, and I'll take care of Chris, ok? You guys go in and have a good time. Have fun. Remember what that is, fun?" She motioned to Leo to give her control over the stroller. "Come on." Piper and Leo moved hesitantly toward the entrance to the wedding. Phoebe motioned to Piper. "Diaper bag." She took the diaper bag from Piper. "Thank you." She grabbed Buffy's hand. "You're staying here. I haven't seen you for a month and a half."
"My diaper bag…."
"Leo and Piper can bring it back with them." She looked at Piper and Leo. "Go, go, go." Piper and Leo hesitantly joined the audience where Buffy and Alex had been sitting.
Chris was still crying and Phoebe found herself at a loss at what to do. She tried rocking the stroller back and forth.
"Here." Buffy leaned down and picked Chris up, holding him against her heart. "You're ok. Shh. You're ok, Chris."
"Chris, huh?" Buffy and Phoebe turned around and found Inspector Sheridan and Darryl standing on the grass behind them. "Interesting name. Same as the guy who died in your house a couple months ago, isn't it?"
"Are you following me?" Phoebe asked.
"Yes, I am. Well, actually, I would have approached you sooner, but, uh, Lieutenant Morris here thought that you might need some time to mourn your loss. He's very protective of you. Seems to know you real well, which is why I asked him to be my partner on this. You know, Phoebe, you and your sisters don't seem to be getting out much lately. And Buffy, you left for a month and a half. Why is that, I wonder? You're not hiding from me, are you?"
"We've got nothing to hide." Buffy said. "My boyfriend and I were visiting our friends downstate."
"Good, then you'll have no objections coming downtown to answer some questions. You've just been served." Sheridan held out the paper.
"Questions about what?" Phoebe asked.
"About what really happened to…. the other Chris. How he mysteriously broke out of jail, how come he doesn't seem to appear in any database, how come you didn't have a funeral for him, what happened to his body…. you know, just stuff like that. Four o'clock. Don't be late." Sheridan walked away.
Buffy shook her head and looked at Darryl. "You know, I can almost understand you not helping us, but to help her?"
"It's not like that, I swear." Darryl said. "I don't want to be in the middle of this, but she knows I know something. She knows we got history."
"And you think if she exposes us, she's not gonna bust you, too?"
Sheridan cleared her throat. "Coming, Lieutenant?"
"You're gonna have to choose a side, Darryl. It's just the way it works." Buffy said, turning away and dismissing Darryl.
"Mama mama." Alex said, tugging on Buffy's skirt. She held her hands up towards Chris.
Buffy smiled and put the now sleeping Chris in his stroller. "Say 'hi Chris.'"
"Iss." Alex leaned over and kissed Chris's cheek.
Buffy heard footsteps running frantically across the grass and looked up to sees Piper and Leo running toward them. Piper was wearing Leo's jacket. "Hey! Is the wedding over already?"
Leo opened his mouth to explain, but seemed to not be able to find the words to describe it. He gaped wordlessly for a moment, then turned to Piper. She opened the jacket with both hands to show another four tucked inside. She raised her middle two hands and waved.
"Oh," Phoebe said.
"My," Buffy said.
"God." They both said.
"Let's get outta here." Leo said as Piper shut the jacket closed around her.
"I don't understand." Paige said. "How could this have happened?"
"Beats the hell out of me." Phoebe said.
The two and Buffy were both staring at Piper in traditional Hindu dress as she tended to both her children efficiently. One hand held the bottle for Chris as a second hand gently pulled up the blanket over him. Her third hand stirred Wyatt's food with a spoon held in her fourth hand while her fifth hand brushed his hair lightly from his forehead.
Leo walked into the room and smiled as he gazed at Piper. "Isn't she beautiful?" He walked up behind Piper as he continued to watch her. With her sixth hand, Piper grabbed and squeezed Leo's back side. He inhaled sharply and she glanced back and smiled coyly at him.
"I can't believe what I'm seeing." Buffy said.
"Tell me about it." Phoebe said. "When was the last time you saw Piper grab Leo's ass."
"That's not what I'm talking about."
"Uh, we need to do something…. quickly." Paige said.
The phone rang and Piper answered it with one of her many hands. "Hello? Phoebe, it's for you."
"Ok, Paige. Book of Shadows. Hindu spirits." Phoebe said. Paige nodded and headed out of the room as Phoebe reached for the phone. "Hello? Uh, actually, Elise, yeah. I'm kind of up to my elbows in stuff. Wait. What? Leslie? Ok. Who…. who's Leslie? Elise, don't you think I should have a say in this? Yeah…. no, now's not really a good time. Hello? She hung up on me. I cannot believe she hung up on me." Phoebe handed the phone back to Piper and Piper put it down, turned, and wrapped her six arms around Leo. "Ok. We'll just leave you two to go at it." Buffy and Phoebe walked out and headed up to the attic.
"Bright side?" Buffy asked. "At least we know that Piper and Leo still have the hots for each other."
"Yeah, well, you better be careful with that whole hots thing because it's contagious." Paige said. "Don't stand too close. It comes courtesy of Shakti, the Hindu goddess of creation, and Shiva, her lover, the god of destruction."
"Ok, but why did this happen to Piper and Leo?" Buffy asked. "Any ideas?"
"Why does anything happen to any of us around here?"
"Good point."
"'Shakti and Shiva are commonly invoked at weddings because they're considered to be the ultimate lovers.'" Phoebe read.
"Well, I'm thinking it's meant to be symbolic." Paige said.
"Unless there are magical lovers to hijack?"
"Read on."
"'Shakti, also called the ultimate mother, and Shiva together created all things, and if they consummate their love again, all things will be obliterated and the universe will be reborn.'"
"Talk about your big bang theory."
"We so need to break them up." Buffy said.
Phoebe and Paige nodded and followed Buffy downstairs. Piper and Leo were kissing passionately, completely consumed in each other. "All right, stop it!" Phoebe said. "You two, stop it right now! Stop it, stop it, stop it." Phoebe and Paige physically pulled the two apart. "You go over there, you over here." Phoebe pulled Piper aside, but Piper used her six hands to push Phoebe away from her, keeping Phoebe busy slapping at Piper's six hands. "And keep your hands to yourself."
"But you're interrupting us." Piper said.
"And saving life as we know it." Buffy said.
"What are you talking about?" Leo asked.
"Look at your outfit. Does that look like something you normally wear?"
"Well, no."
"Exactly. This is not the first time we have been hijacked by gods. So you just have to fight it."
"I don't want to fight it. I haven't felt this potent in years."
"Oversharing."
"Any idea how to redirect his potency?" Phoebe asked.
"Yeah. We should send him after Barbas." Paige said.
"Barbas?" Leo asked.
"And what about the risk to the Elders?" Phoebe asked.
"I think the risk to the universe is greater." Paige said. "I made a vanquishing potion. I'll go get it."
"I won't need it." Leo looked at Piper. "I'll be back."
"I'll be waiting." Piper said. With the crack of lightning, Leo disappeared out of the room. "Wow, is that hot or what?"
"Or what." Phoebe agreed as Piper leisurely reclined on the chair, her four hands linked on her tummy as she waited for Leo to return.
"Ok, I'm gonna go to magic school and try to find a spell to dispossess them." Paige said.
"Take the babies with you. They'll be safer there." Buffy said.
"No! The baby stays with me." Piper said.
"Ok." Buffy looked at Phoebe as she turned to leave the room. "Where are you going?"
"I have to go to, you know, work."
"What about…."
"Just keep them apart." And with that, Phoebe was gone.
