WARNING: Swearing, dark humour.
DISCLAIMER: The musical belongs to Lin-Manuel Miranda.

I was supposed to post this on the 31st but I forgot XD


Now, for being a backstabbing asshole, I don't want him in my office. Ooout! Ooout! — Alexander Hamilton about Thomas Jefferson, 2018.

He [Jay]'s always been like that, but right now he turned stupider — Thomas Jefferson, good person, better friend, 2018.

I wanna keep living well — Prince John Adams, allergic to commonness, 2018.

I was up late reading fanfics and now I don't remember how to be a functional person — Peggy Schuyler, she represents me, 2018.

You're the Ringo Starr of life: we all now you exist and that you do things, but nobody cares enough to remember — Alexander Hamilton to Aaron Burr, 2018.

Love is my drug

Don't take drugs, it's bad for the health

And the pots have damaged your brain enough — John Laurens, Hercules Mulligan and Alexander Hamilton, 2018.

You're my Tommypedia — Marisa Hadfield to Thomas Jefferson, 2018.

M [While criticising Lee]: Idiot

L: Did somebody call me? — James Madison and Charles Lee, 2018.

You were the one with the intention, I didn't want to know anything about it — Hercules Mulligan, the supportive boyfriend, to Lafayette, 2018.

Uh, Mr Offended. Now we can't say anything to him or what? — Angelica Schuyler about her brother-in-law, 2018.

Make me that like this

A damn is what I'm gonna make for you — Alexander Hamilton and Thomas Jefferson, the rebel, 2018.

Wanna go to McDonald's?

Braaah, brraaaah, brraaaah — Lafayette and the wide vocabulary of Hercules Mulligan, 2018.

Who does he think he is? The Secretary of State, the VP, the own President or what? — James Madison about Thomas Jefferson in a bad day, 2018.

When I say I'm very tired, it means I'm very tired. Not tired, very tired — George Washington, I think he's tired, 2018.

This guy's attitude is a bad joke and an absolute lack of respect, damn single-neuronal man — James Madison about John Adams, still in his bad day, 2018.

You're the Thanos of ridiculousness, with the Gauntlet of idiocy — Alexander Hamilton, Eliza has taught him well, to John Adams, 2018.

I'm gonna buy him a little photo with a sentence that'd read: 'Those who kiss your ass the most are the same ones who would kick it the hardest in this life' — Lafayette to Hercules Mulligan during a marital argument, 2018.

Look, my picture of the Virgin fell. That must be a sign — Libby Morales, the believer, 2018.

She (Polly) hasn't even asked her father for what she needs for that stupid project… What is that girl waiting for? For me to go and tell him? So I'm the one standing his bad mood because she waited till last hour again? No. She better doesn't hold her breath, because I won't. She can go to the forest, cut down a tree and get the paper and the cardboard she needs from there — James Madison, reaching the limit of second-hand parenthood, to Libby Morales, 2018.

I work with the Devil — Eliza Schuyler Hamilton about a workmate, 2018.

I know, I know I'm a fucking horrid woman, I know I'm a miserable when it comes to myself — Marisa Hadfield making self-criticism, 2018.

That fucking dumbass [Laurens] lost my pens, I'm gonna hit him so hard I'll put him in orbit — Alexander Hamilton about his best friend, 2018.

Where did you go to do the photocopies? To the Olympus? — Angelica Schuyler, desperate, to Thomas Jefferson, 2018.

There was a bald man in front of me, saying he's in a hurry and complaining about he's gonna be late to I-don't-know-what… Be late, bowling ball, I don't care! — Hercules Mulligan, the empathetic, 2018.

Alex, do you work in the radio? You don't, right? Then stop the commentaries — Aaron Burr, surpassing the master, 2018.

Everybody has free days and relaxing time but me. What am I? The last piece of shit of that house? — James Madison, about to lose it before the year ends, 2018.

I don't scream, I talk energetically — Alexander Hamilton, 2018.

Couple I like, couple that ends up becoming true. I'm like the matchmaker of Mulan, but without being a bitch — Libby Cupid Morales, 2018.

When the music is cheery, it cheers you up — Peggy Schuyler, melomaniac, 2018.

From now on, things will be done the way I say or not at all. And that's fucking it, god damnit! — Thomas 'Do as I say or else' Jefferson, 2018.

For her friends, she shows no restraint. All day pam, pam, pam, taking the wallet out like a gunwoman and making the billets fly — Aaron 'Love is in the air' Burr about his wife, 2018.

I don't wish harm on anybody, I just wish they don't do better than I do — Alexander Hamilton, he wishes you good, but not much, 2018.

You can't live without living — James Madison, the logical, part II, 2018.

What would you a want a pet for? If you've already got me — John Adams to Thomas Jefferson, 2018.

When I'm done with him, they're gonna call him Martin McFly, because I'm gonna hit him so hard I'll send him back to the future — Marisa Hadfield about her ex-husband, 2018.

I'm not racist, I hate all humanity just the same — George King, the fair hater, 2018.

I don't wanna fight with anybody. Is he stupid? Yes. Will I tell him if he pushes me too far? Absolutely — Hercules Mulligan, he's learnt from Hamilton, about Laurens, 2018.

I refuse to be the maid in this house any longer — James Madison's ultimatum, 2018.

Do I have the word 'Idiot' pressed on the forehead or what? —Eliza Schuyler Hamilton, she also has limits, 2018.

His voice sounds like his voice — Libby Morales VS English, 2018.

You've always been an inept at driving, now you're even more inept — Angelica Schuyler to Peggy, best of sisters, 2018.

I'm seeing you with the face

What face?

The Face. With capital F.

What face is that?

The one in which you're with the balls inflated. I wanna have a peaceful day, okay? — Lafayette and Hercules Mulligan, best of couples, 2018.

Sometimes I need a break to rest from so much intellectuality — Aaron Burr, an example to follow, 2018.

In what kind of world do you live in? Under the sea, with the Little Mermaid; with the Smurfs or a mix of the two? — Alexander Hamilton to Peggy Schuyler, closest of siblings, 2018.

I like to have dinner while eating — Thomas Jefferson, a simple man, 2018.

This water's wet — Libby Morales VS English II, 2018.

I don't pay taxis for drunkards — Hercules Mulligan about John Laurens, 2018.

This is a cloth, you filthy heathens — George Washington loving his staff, 2018.

I think I was a pig in another life

And in this one as well — John Adams and Marisa Hadfield, bonding, 2018.

Do you practice any sports?

No, I've already suffered a lot in my life and I don't want to suffer anymore — Libby Morales and Alexander Hamilton, 2018.

I live in a field of dodgeball with this man [Jefferson] — James Madison, sick of life, 2018.

The little ones've spent three fucking years doing nothing but being more useless than a red light in the GTA, but noooow they are trying to come with a solution! I can't be mad, then! — Alexander Hamilton, as resentful as honest, 2018.

I won't make that man [Adams] any breakfast tomorrow. Damned unthankful brat… Tomorrow I'm gonna make him a shit! — Thomas Jefferson, 2018 [He ended up making him breakfast].

Smoke began to come out from there… I don't know. Smoke. Smoke — Libby Morales explaining the death of the microwave, 2018.

Write this with a font that's big so it fills a lot of space, but not too much so the boss doesn't notice, and you finish earlier by doing less — Marisa Hadfield, the woman we all needed in here, 2018.

I'll announce the news when I announce them — George Washington, he is where he is thanks to his organisation, 2018.

I'm kind, not stupid — Libby Morales, 2018.

I'm not xenophobic, I'm organised. If God in his infinite wisdom decided to separate us by continents, he must have had his reasons — George King, the frustrated humanitarian, 2018.

Even if I've gotta go by crawling, I'll still go there to insult him — Angelica Schuyler about a teacher that bullied her son back at school. Good person, better mother, 2018.

You've got less skills than a deaf in the middle of a dictation — James Madison to Aaron Burr, 2018.

I wouldn't have had me — John Laurens criticising his parents' decisions, 2018.

I'm gonna pretend I've gotta go to the bathroom, so I can't hear them — Libby Morales, absolutely fitting in, they grow up so fast, 2018.

A: Crafty, with that silent behaviour fooling everyone into thinking you're an innocent and pure soul, but you're just a piñata.

Mads: Yes, well, you… Wait, what did you call me?

A: Piñata.

Mads: What?

A: Those fishes that bite!

Jeff: Piranha.

A: That as well — John Adams and his amazing skills of oratory part II, 2018.

I like to go to those parties and gatherings because it's my perfect opportunity to drink without looking like a drunkard — John Laurens, smarter than he seems, 2018.

Are you smoking drugs as we talk?

… There's a bit of narcotic in here, yeah

You're making me a bit dizzy, Mr King

Am I? Hold on, now you're gonna be dizzier. [Exhales smoke in the mic of his phone] — Alfred and George King in the middle of a prank call, 2018.

I don't criticise. I comment reality with friends — Aaron Burr, lawyer in the day; commentator in his free time, 2018.

Not even Dalí, in his most surrealist dreams, would have imagined a place like this —Thomas Jefferson, lover of art, 2018.

Why do you put pens that don't write within people's reach — John Laurens, the frustrated, 2018.

I don't think to be more than everyone else; I am more than everyone else — Alexander Hamilton, the personification of ego, 2018.

I'm not going to apologise because you don't have enough balls to put up with my fiery personality — Dolley Payne, my new role model, 2018.

My best dreams come from the naps I took because I was too angry to be awake — Libby Morales, 2018.

I'm wearing shades because last night I was more thirsty than shameful — Hercules the Honest Mulligan, 2018.

If when I started, I hated them all and I was young and unexperienced… Imagine now. I'd kill somebody — James Madison talking about his school days, 2018.

When I say 'no', that 'no' is bigger than the doors of an ancient castle — Alexander Hard-Headedilton, 2018.

If someone sends me a voice message that's eight minutes long, it better be Stairway to Heaven. Otherwise, I'm not fucking listening to it — Angelica Schuyler and her priorities, 2018.

I don't trust people that wake up early. If they can do such a thing, imagine what they're capable of — John Adams, the cautious, 2018.

I'm such a good person that I'm a complete asshole to the ones that hate me so they can hate me with evidence and reason, and that way they don't look as stupid as they truly are when they explain their hatred towards me — Alexander Hamilton, good friend; better foe, 2018.

Listen, smile, agree and then do whatever the heck you were going to do. That way, life is easier and you didn't lose time in idiocies — Eliza Schuyler Hamilton and her useful advices, 2018.

There's nothing better than seeing someone you hate falling on their noses right in front of you. You feel such a peace — James Madison, the passive resentful, 2018.

Adams, there's a letter for you in the mail. It says you won the Triangle Bermuda Awards for most things going missing — Alexander Hamilton, the savage, 2018.

For my birthday I was given a valid coupon to send someone to hell, and I'm gonna use it with you. Congratulations! — Angelica Venom Schuyler, 2018.

When you were little, you were a complete jackass. Now, things have changed and you're no longer little — Hercules Mulligan to John Laurens about the cruelty of Time, 2018.

I know I'm a very interesting subject, but, please, next time have balls and talk about me in front of me — Eliza Schuyler Hamilton, she was more perfect for Hamilton than anyone would've suspected, 2018.

Talking about my flaws doesn't mean yours are gonna disappear — Dolley Payne to John Adams, 2018.

I'm not rude, I'm intolerant to assholes like you — Marisa Hadfield to Charles Lee, 2018.

In which one of your two faces do you want me to tell you how fake you are? — James Madison, polite even to tell you off, 2018.

Amoeba who fantasises with being a person — Alexander Hamilton about John Adams, 2018.

James is the only one in here who's normal. The rest are just a bunch of Muppets — Thomas Jefferson, 2018.

Mosquitoes are like family: annoying but they carry your blood — Peggy Schuyler, a family girl, 2018.

Sometimes, I feel jealous of my parents because I'll never have such an amazing child as the one they had — John Laurens, model child despite he hasn't talked to his parents since college, 2018.

The only time success comes before work is in the dictionary — Alexander Hamilton educating the staff, 2018.

Such an ineffectiveness of a human being — James Madison about John Adams, 2018.

A lion shall not turn around when a dog barks at them —Marisa Hadfield, classy even to insult, to Charles Lee, 2018.

For talking bad about me, you've gotta lie; I, to talk good about you, must lie as well — Thomas Jefferson to John Adams, 2018.

The world is full of people who want to pick the fruits of trees they never sowed — George Washington, the wise, 2018.

I'm not resentful; I've got a pretty good memory — Aaron Burr, the disk, 2018.

You're faker than the 'Tomorrow, I'll start the diet' quote — Angelica Schuyler, 2018.

There's nothing like pretending you know nothing to see how far someone can go with their lying — Lafayette, the strategist, 2018.

It's for people like you that shampoo comes with instructions — Hercules Mulligan to John Laurens, 2018.

Now I understand why people talk so badly about you when you're not present — Libby Morales to Charles Lee, 2018.

Sometimes, I look at you and think: Really? That was the spermatozoon that won the race? — Angelica Schuyler to John Adams, 2018.

You're more useless than a keyboard without enter — Alexander Hamilton to his workmates, 2018.

No, it's alright. If their talent is to lie to me, mine will be to pretend I believe them —Eliza Schuyler Hamilton accepting the falseness of the world we live in, 2018.

I'm like in a maxi pad commercial but without being happy — Marisa Hadfield, 2018.

Tell your pride mine sends regards — Thomas Jefferson to Alexander Hamilton, 2018.

I fail to see which good traits you have that compensate that horrendous personality of yours — Alexander Hamilton to John Adams, 2018.

I don't have enemies. I've got confused fans — Dolley Payne, a true star, 2018.

Karma has no menu card. It'll serve you what you deserve! — John Laurens in the middle of a heated speech, 2018.

Yesterday, I jumped oceans for people. Nowadays, I wouldn't even jump a little pond — Eliza Schuyler Hamilton, the disappointed humanitarian, 2018.

They say good things take time to come. Mine must be fucking fantastic, after almost forty years of waiting — James Madison, the patient, 2018.

I don't like to fight with you. It's unfair, as you're less armed, intelligently talking — Thomas Jefferson, best of enemies, to John Adams, 2018.

Have a rest of your day as nice as you — Angelica Schuyler to Charles Lee, 2018.

Your lack of inner beauty couldn't be fixed even if you ate make-up — Lafayette, more sharp-tongued than he seems, 2018.

I'll put your opinion in the bank; maybe one day it'll give me some kind of interest — Aaron Burr, loosing himself, 2018.

True love is when you send someone to hell and still call them to make sure they arrived well — Libby Morales, the caring hater, 2018.

It's incredible how he criticises everybody's lives as if his was an example to follow — Hercules Mulligan about Charles Lee, 2018.

My back's not a voicemail, if you've got something to tell me, tell me in the face — Alexander Hamilton, 2018.

I'd rather put on my earbuds with the volume all the way up and become deaf, than hear all the bullshit people talk — Peggy Schuyler, the eternal teenager, 2018.

Don't drag me into your messes and salvation army — Thomas Jefferson, the selfish friend, to James Madison, 2018.

I remember I guy that wanted to date me in high school. He got close to me and told me: "Would you like there to be something between us?"

And I said: "A wall would be nice" — Alexander Hamilton and his experiences, Vol. 1 Ep. 2, 2018.

She's more optimistic than the musicians of the Titanic — Thomas Jefferson about Libby, 2018.

I don't like to be angry with you. Say you're sorry — John Laurens, the peacemaker, to Hercules Mulligan, 2018.

I don't hide the last time I was on line, because that way it's not funny to ignore people — Angelica Schuyler, the cruel, 2018.

I'm sick of you taking five hours to answer me, but whenever I see you you're always checking your phone each 3 seconds — Alexander Hamilton to John Laurens, 2018.

I really hate when people tell me: 'Wake up, the sun's up'. So? Do I have to photosynthesise or something? — Peggy Flora Schuyler, 2018.

I don't hate him. It's just that sometimes it bothers me that he breathes. Just that… — Thomas Jefferson about his frenemy Alexander Hamilton, 2018.

I care a lot about people's opinions. Very much. I even have a finger, right in the middle of my hand, to gift them with as a thank you — Aaron Burr, the passive-aggressive, 2018.

Why are you going hazy? Only because all your employees are incompetent toddlers? — Martha Washington, supportive wife, 2018.

Oh, sorry, I didn't realise you were an expert in my life and how I should live it. Please, continue while I take notes — Marisa Hadfield to Charles Lee, 2018.

I'm so quiet because, when I was little, my mother used to tell me that if I had nothing nice to say, I should keep my silence — James Madison throwing digs to the staff during a meeting, 2018.

Sometimes, I laugh so much at you that I think I should thank you for the great time you give me — Angelica Schuyler, mocking but with manners, 2018.

I'm starting to appreciate this bond we created so much, that I promise you that if one day you make me too mad, I won't hit you. Too hard, that is — Alexander Hamilton consolidating the relationship with Thomas Jefferson, 2018.

I've got the superpower of collecting arguments for months and then use them against people when I feel I'm losing in a present fight — Libby Morales, secret supervillain, 2018.

I still can't understand. If you're such a little thing, how can you bother this much? — Thomas Jefferson to John Adams, 2018.

I like you so much that if one day I run over you, I'd reverse to see if you got too hurt — George King to George Washington, best of friends, 2018.

Winning doesn't matter. What's truly important is to make the other lose — John Laurens, the secret competitive, 2018.

She's so fake that she should bring a tag with the words 'Made in China' attached to her — Eliza Schuyler Hamilton, 2018.

He was not that handsome to compensate being such a jackass — Dolley Payne about her ex-husband, 2018.

It's useless to send people like that guy to Hell, because even the Devil gives him back — James Madison about a teacher he used to have in Elementary School, 2018.

I truly deserve a Nobel Peace Prize just for all the times I controlled myself and didn't run over some people with a tractor — Peggy Mandela Schuyler, 2018.

My sister has the Bee Syndrome: she thinks to be a Queen when she's nothing more than a bug — Thomas Jefferson, the brother we all long for, 2018.

I'm the most powerful person after a party; because while everybody's getting drunk, I am taking pictures — Lafayette, the man we all want as a friend, 2018.

Happiness lies in the little things. A little yacht, a little mansion, a little wealth… — John 'Dream small-scale' Adams, 2018.

I don't even know why you're making a fuss now — James Madison summing up my working experience in this law firm, 2018.

Nobody knows all I've been through. Nobody. Sons of bitches, the bunch of you — Aaron Burr during a nervous breakdown, 2018.

I want to make use of this moment to congratulate all the crafty asses who talk about me at my backs. They truly have an interesting topic to talk about — Alexander Hamilton in the last day before the Christmas break, 2018.

I don't know anymore. I feel like, each passing year, this becomes more delirious — George Washington, regretting every decision he's made in life to finish the year in a good note, 2018.


Thanks all who read, comment, support and keep being part of this crazy series. It means a lot. Wish you all a wonderful 2019!

Sursum corda!