Disclaimer: I own nothing
Dedicated to: Sportyangel15
I'm Still a Guy
Zeke cringed as he looked at his shirt. 'Boy I MUST love this girl if I'm wearing this.' He thought bitterly.
Troy walked into the room and busted out laughing, "Dude, you look ridiculous."
Zeke glared at him, "Shut up Troy. It's Sharpay's night, I'll wear whatever the fuck she wants me to wear."
"Whatever dude, can I have your man card now?" Chad said from the doorframe. Zeke shook his head, 'They don't know how lucky they are that Taylor, Gabriella, Kelsi, and Mary don't choose their outfits for them.' Zeke looked at himself in the mirror again, the pink shirt with frills along the line of buttons looked really ridiculous on him. And the dark pink tie made it even worse. Or maybe that was the gray pinstriped suit that had a pale pink as the color of the strips.
When you see a dear, you see Bambi
And I see antlers up on the wall
When you see a lake you think picnics
And I see a large mouth up under that log
"Dude, she's trying to make you into her poodle, since Ryan here's got his own life." Ryan waved from his place in the corner on his cell phone, as sympathetic smile on his handsome face. If anyone knew what hell Zeke was going through it was Ryan.
"Whatever guys, it's not THAT bad." Zeke tried to convince not only them, but also himself.
You're probably thinkin' that you're gonna change me
In some ways, well, maybe you might
Scrub me down, dress me up
Oh, but no matter what, remember, I'm still a guy
"They're going to change all of us whether we agree to it or not." Jason came into the room fiddling with a flower on his coat jacket, "Zeke's just the first to be neutered." The room erupted in laughter, with the exception of a VERY unhappy Zeke.
"Come on guys, be a little supportive. It's her first major red carpet event, and we're all going." Zeke begged them, "Just don't make this night anymore difficult for me than it already is."
When you see a priceless French painting
I see a drunk naked girl
When you think that riding a wild bull sounds crazy
And I'd like to give it a whirl
The door flew open and in waltzed Sharpay herself. "Oh my God! Zeke you look devastatingly handsome darling." Ryan rolled his eyes at her overly done voice. Everything about his twin sister Sharpay Evans was extravagant and way too much.
"Thanks baby, you look really pretty yourself." Zeke gave her a peck on the lips.
"Isn't the dress darling?" She squealed, spinning around in the knee-length pink dress that matched Zeke's shirt perfectly.
"It's something else Shar." Troy smiled, dropping a peck on her cheek.
"Chad? Ryan? Jason?" She looked for their approval.
"Amazing as usual sis." Ryan said
"Unique." Jason piped up, hoping that got him out of complimenting one of the ugliest dresses he'd ever seen.
"Different." Chad muttered from the corner.
Turning around Sharpay glared at him, "Different how Chadwick?"
"Good different." He said, thinking better of giving his true opinion.
Well, love makes a man do some things he ain't proud of
And in a weak moment I might
Walk your sissy dog, hold your purse at the mall
But remember, I'm still a guy
"Let's go, the girls are waiting boys." She led the way to the door, "Oh love? Can you grab my bag?" She smiled at Zeke
"Of course baby." Zeke walked over to the corner of the room and picked up the hot pink clutch that matched his tie. Troy clapped him on the back as he followed the sound of Sharpay's clacking silver heels down the hall to the front door of her's and Zeke's mansion.
The girls were already waiting by the front door, "That poor boy." Gabriella muttered when she saw what Zeke was wearing.
"It's hideous." Mary Boyles, Ryan's fiancée, mumbled
"Is he carrying her purse?" Kelsi asked incredulously.
"It's Sharpay what do you expect?" Taylor said under her breath with disgust.
And I'll pour out my heart, hold your hand in the car
Write a love song that makes you cry
Then turn right around, knock some jerk to the ground
'Cause he copped a feel as you walked by
Piling into the limo that would take the group to the premiere of Sharpay's first big movie they all sat quietly, Zeke had never looked so ridiculous. "Pay?" Gabriella whispered.
"Yeah Boo?" Sharpay turned to her best friend.
"What is Zeke wearing?" Gabriella asked
"Isn't it amazing?" Sharpay squealed, "I mean come on, look how amazing I've done with him. You should work on Troy." Sharpay advised
"What about Troy?" Troy asked from the other side of Gabriella
"Nothing Troy. Trust me." Gabriella gave him an apologetic smile, "Pay, Troy's fine the way he is."
"Have it your own sad way." Sharpay shook her head and looked at each of the guys in turn, seeing a project in each of them.
"Leave them alone." Taylor advised.
I can hear you talkin' to your friends
Sayin' yeah girls he's come a long way
From draggin' his knuckles and carryin' a club
And buildin' a fire in a cave
Getting out of the limo the group was faced with the familiar flashes from the paparazzi. With Tory, Chad, and Jason playing for the Lakers, with Zeke owning the most popular restaurant in L.A., Sharpay being an actress, Ryan a huge agent, Gabriella being a world-renowned singer, Taylor being a world-renowned doctor that was helping discover the cure for cancer and diabetes, Kelsi writing songs for the Gabriella, and Mary being a TV star, this group was used to flashes.
When the flamboyant movie was over, they piled back into the white limo to head back to Zeke and Sharpay's, where their cars were so they could each go home for the night. The whole evening Zeke kept a protective arm around Sharpay, knowing how much the paparazzi loved to flirt with her.
Lying on her stomach two hours later Sharpay was demanding a back rub. Zeke nodded and got the lotion, at least she let him finish his back rubs now. At first she would hit him and leave the room because she didn't like them.
But when you say a back rub means only a back rub
Then you swat my hand when I try
Well, now what can I say at the end of the day
Honey, I'm still a guy
And I'll pour out my heart, hold your hand in the car
Write a love song that makes you cry
Then turn right around knock some jerk to the ground
'Cause he copped a feel as you walked by
The next morning at breakfast Sharpay pulled Zeke out of his newspaper, "So wanna go with me to get a manicure and pedicure?" she looked at him hopefully. "You could get one too." She suggested brightly.
Sighing, Zeke set his paper down, "Baby, I love you, but no I don't want to." Sharpay frowned, he didn't usually say no to her. "I know that upsets you, but I'm a guy, think about it Shar, baby. Would you want to if you were me. Me, not you, me."
Sharpay sat in a stony silence and thought about what Zeke had said, "Do I go overboard?" she thought
These days there's dudes gettin' facials
Manicured, waxed, and botoxed
With deep spray-on tans and creamy lotiony hands
You can't grip a tackle box
"You actually said no?" Jason arched his black eyebrows in disbelief. The five guys sat at the bar in Zeke's restaurant sipping beers and eating a late lunch.
"Yup." Zeke shook his head, "Manicures and pedicures? That's too much." Zeke sighed, "She's mad though."
"No shit dude, you turned down the Ice Queen." Ryan held his beer up, "Here's to Zeke getting his man card back."
The guys laughed as they clinked their beers together, including Zeke.
Yeah, with all of these men linin' up to get neutered
It's hip now to be feminized
But I don't highlight my hair, I've still got a pair
Yeah, honey, I'm still a guy
Oh, my eyebrows ain't plucked, there's a gun in my truck
Oh thank God, I'm still a guy
Yeah, boy
As Sharpay thought about it she knew she wasn't going overboard, she was taming him, 'A manicure and pedicure are too much, but I'm doing well otherwise.' She thought.
Zeke smiled at the thought of his fiancée, 'Sure he was her poodle, but he loved her for it.'
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Mollie XOXO
