Hey guys! I love being able to write these again, I missed it! Anyway, I once again tracked down Megan Geyer's list of ideas for me, and I decided to put like three of them together so it would be a long chapter… ish? I don't know, we'll find out!
Jasper's Yummy
"Ooooooh, JASPER!" Alice called from her room, Jasper was in front of her in a millisecond, considering he was right next to her when she called.
"Yes my love?"
"Mannequin time!"
"Uhm, Alice, uh, well… OH! Bella, Bella is coming over and uh I have to go hunt so I don't try to kill her again, you know? You knooooooowwwwww." Jasper grinned sheepishly.
"Jasper, we hunted yesterday."
"OH BUT I'M SO THIRSTY FOR BELLA'S BLOOD MMM I HOPE SHE GETS A PAPER CUT THAT CLUMSY BITCH!" Jasper burst.
"FINE! Go hunt then, but be back soon!" Alice was clearly annoyed.
"Byee!" And with that, Jasper sprinted away.
"Emmett." Alice whispered, and Emmett appeared with Rosalie on his leg.
"YES, ALICE?" Emmett said loudly.
"Why are you yelling?"
"BECAUSE I LIKE MEATBALLS!"
"Alright, BE MY MANNEQUIN!"
"OKAY!" Emmett threw Rosalie out the window so he could be the mannequin, and Alice started to work at once.
She put a blue and pink sparkly dress on him that ripped as soon as she put it on him.
"URG! EMMETT! You're too big!" She dry-sobbed.
"Alice, I have my own blue and pink sparkly dress that you can put on me…"
"Why?"
"Because I like to eat spaghetti with a dash of parmesan fungus."
"Emmett, I… We don't eat…"
Rosalie walked in then, and stared blankly.
"Rosalie? Having a blonde moment there?" Alice asked, amused.
"I haven't killed Mike in a while…" She said in a dazed voice.
"WHEN I SAY HILLSHIRE YOU SAY FARM! HILLSHIRE!" Emmett yelled enthusiastically.
"FARM! GO MEAT!" Rosalie and Alice said at the same time.
"So, anyway, I'm going to go play in the basement for a while…" Rosalie walked slowly to the basement. "Ohhhhh Miiiikeeee…."
*in the kitchen*
"Oh you are so yummy, I know I am too. Oh, yes. Oh, yes I do. You are so yummy… To humans. And so am I. Even to non-humans… Did you know that? Everyone thinks I'm yummy… Even Jacob because he said it to me in his wolf form. It's okay… We can be yummy together, YES WE CAN!" Jasper spoke to his freshly made chocolate chip cookies like they were babies. Just then Alice busted through the oven.
"IS THIS WHAT YOU CALL HUNTING NOWADAYS! THERE'S A LOT OF DRESSES THAT NEED MODELING AND THEY'RE YOUR SIZE!" And with that, Alice grabbed Jazz by the ear and ran him up to her room so he could be her mannequin.
*in the basement*
"SOMEBODY HELP MEEEE!" Mike screamed when he woke up tied to a slim jim. "AAAAHHHH!"
"Shut up MIKE!" Rosalie poked him in the head, and he collapsed, dead once again.
Alright… Wasn't as good as I thought it would be. Such good ideas, but bleh! Haha, well review and you get to see my Jacob and Edward dolls come to life and fight. Yay!
