A/N: I'm sure I gave all of you a heart attack last chapter. Apologies. Here is the fall out. There is quite a bit of cursing in this so sorry to those who find that kind of language offensive.
Disclaimer: These characters are the creative property of LJ Smith and The CW. No copyright infringement is intended.
Cars blew their horns; people gave him the finger, and shouted obscenities as Damon Salvatore wondered aimlessly down the middle of Laurel Avenue right in downtown Mystic Falls. His bizarre behavior might be drawing annoyance from commuters but it was someone else's attention he wanted. These people didn't know how very close he was to going off and annihilating everything in his path. To fucking shit up. They. Just. Did. Not. Know.
How could she do this to him? His mind kept screaming the question like a banshee hoping the answer would fall out of the sky and right into his lap. But things didn't work that way—at least not for him. Damon had to fight tooth and nail for everything he had and still lost. The universe must truly despise him to make the woman he loved betray him in the way he always feared she would.
Damon pulled his lips back from his teeth unaware or vaguely aware of the fact his canines were showing and the telltale red wiggling veins were very much prominent on his face. The urge to flip his switch was irresistible; he wanted to do it so badly that he was practically salivating.
The screeching ties of a minivan barreling down on him caught his attention. Damon snapped his enraged eyes towards the driver who quickly turned the wheel to the left to avoid plowing into him. The van came to a jostling stop, the passengers wailing. Damon took one step in its direction getting himself ready to lay waste to the family of four that had just been handed to him on a silver fucking platter.
Just as he reached out to rip the driver side door clean off, something slammed into him and Damon found himself sandwiched between a brick wall and his annoying little brother.
"What the hell is wrong you?" Stefan seethed. "Exposing yourself in full view of the public during daylight! Damon, are you insane?"
Bracing his hands around Stefan's wrists, Damon took extreme pleasure and snapping them like twigs. Stefan howled with pain, grunted, and ground his teeth on top of each other but he refused to let his brother go.
Eyes the color of a cloudless day glared at Stefan with enough heat to incinerate him. "YES! I've gone insane for thinking that Bonnie would never hurt me. That she would never break my fuckin' heart!"
Stefan blinked at this unexpected twist. Finally he released his brother who slumped against the wall—face returning to normal. "What are you talking about? What did she do?"
Scrubbing a hand across his face, Damon stared at the stained asphalt shaking his head back and forth. "She cheated on me with that gotdamn asshole of a bastard."
Stefan's mouth dropped out of shock. Needless to say this information was very hard for him to swallow and accept. Stefan knew how devoted and loyal Bonnie was so for her to step out…
He attempted to place a comforting hand on Damon's shoulder, but expecting the gesture Damon stepped out of the way and shrugged Stefan off.
"I don't want your pity. I bet you're chuckling like a clown on the inside. Damon gets foiled again and his past bites him in the ass for being such an ass to people. Yuck it up, chuckles."
Stefan shook his head in the negative. "Damon, I didn't want you to go through this again. I'm sorry," Stefan said sincerely. "Did she explain herself?"
Bracing his shoulder up against the wall, Damon replayed that conversation and revelation over in his mind.
Forty-five minutes ago…
Damon clicked off the flat screen plunging the room into silence. The reports of the deadly plane crash that happened right outside of Andrews Air Force base in Maryland was still making national and local news. He wasn't interested in hearing the boring details of what caused the crash so much as who was on the plane—that's all he really cared about and wanted answers to.
"I spoke with Elijah and he confirmed that Jonas, Luka, possibly Gloria and at least two other people were on that plane when it burst into flames soon after lift off. Of course we're going to have to wait for the FBI to sort out of the bodies and it'll take dental x-rays to identify the victims—which could take months," Damon explained.
Bonnie remained noticeably quiet. He figured she was still in shock. After being incapacitated, subsequently robbed of her powers, and of course finally reading that letter her mom sent on her birthday, he was positive her mind was in a million different places right now. Damon wished there was more he could do for her, but ultimately it was Bonnie's call on how to proceed. Right now, he was determined to find someway to restore her powers.
He thought going to the crash site, Bonnie might be able to channel the energy that's released when a witch dies a horrible death. However—he was sure that only worked if the witch doing the channeling actually had powers to begin with. Needless to say he was uncertain if Bonnie would be able to draw anything being she was now just another plain clothes human.
He observed her as she played with her fingers as she stared off into space.
Damon continued speaking, "In the meantime I was thinking we should getaway for a few days. I was thinking maybe the west coast or maybe we should go international. I've always had a fascination with Prague, but the weather might be sucky so no dice. What about…Australia? Or maybe we can go somewhere more remote…"
"…I cheated…"
"I guess it doesn't really matter because the point is…what?!"
Damon thought he heard her whisper something about her cheating. He stood immobilized as if shot up with vervain because something was beginning to burn from the inside out.
Silence ensued aside from the ticking of the Grandfather clock. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. It measured the time in increments of Damon's love for her dissolving into hatred, Bonnie figured and wished she could blast the stupid instrument to pieces. Instead she shifted on the couch under the weight of his glare.
Bonnie moistened her lips and spoke a little louder and clearer, yet she refused to make eye contact with Damon. She couldn't.
"I-I cheated on you."
He thought that's what she said but a large chunk of him hoped that wasn't what she said.
His silence was unnerving and finally made Bonnie bold enough to look up and meet his gaze which naturally was filled with confusion, fury, denial, and something else Bonnie couldn't name. Her heart was beating like a Tiffany drum in her chest.
She took this as her opportunity to just get everything out while she crushed her boyfriend's heart in the process. Bonnie literally felt like she was going to pass out, throw up, and implode all at once. She broke out into a cold sweat.
"It happened yesterday. I was at the witches house when…Damon showed up. We talked for a minute and then he flew us back to his place, and it wasn't so we could fool around or anything, but…I ah…I we were at his house…and then we said something's, and then we were kissing, and then I was half naked on my back, but I stopped before anything could happen," Bonnie stood to her feet. "And…I-I-I told him that sleeping with him wouldn't change how I feel about you, that it's you I want to be with, and I told him that he needed to let me go. I swear, Damon we didn't have sex…I mean…he ah…he you know…but I stopped him! And I know things went too far and I never should have been alone with him in the first place, but I love you! I'm sorry, Damon, I'm so sorry."
The ticking Grandfather clock filled in the silence after Bonnie's spiel.
"Please…say something," Bonnie pled.
Damon had nothing to say. He literally couldn't form a coherent thought in his head. Railing, destroying property, promising someone a painful death, he had thrown legendary tantrums that could rival any two year olds his entire life, but today he was simply depleted. Bonnie fucked around on him. His sweet, beautiful girlfriend had the gall to stand before him and tell him that she did the one thing she said she'd never do.
He swallowed hard trying to gather himself and repress those feelings of striking out at her in the only way he knew how. His heart, his cold dead heart that she breathed life into was now on fire and disintegrating. Something shut down inside of Damon like someone snapping the cable of an elevator. It plummeted and burst into flames.
"You have ten seconds to get the fuck out of my house," Damon said coldly.
Bonnie blinked. That certainly wasn't the reaction she had come to expect from Damon. She expected he would fly into a rage and scream in her face and call her everything except a child of God. This however was far worse and much more chilling. His words spoken in finality made her panic rise. If they could talk about this, Bonnie was sure they could work past it because he obviously wasn't seeing the picture. The picture was that she had chosen HIM!
Bravely she took a step towards Damon but he shifted in a way that made her fear for her life. Her eyes dropped to his hands and she noticed they were balled into such tight fists that his knuckles were practically glowing.
It was his face though which made the blood drain out of Bonnie's body. Damon hadn't looked that disgusted with her since the night Emily possessed her and destroyed the crystal. In fact, the expression he wore then she would say was flirty compared to what his face was doing now.
"Did you not hear me?"
"Da…"
He snarled. "Five seconds!"
"Damon, please we should talk about this."
Damon lips pulled back from his teeth and Bonnie saw his fangs. She gulped yet was still willing to try to reach him.
"Damon…"
He was in her face before she could blink causing Bonnie to literally jump out of her skin. She gasped sharply and instinctively tried to give him an aneurysm only she realized too late she was without her powers, and was at his complete and total mercy. He took her roughly by the arms and pinned her against a wall. Her breath rushed out of her.
Damon bent at the knees so they could be eye-level. "I'm trying my very best not to strangle you, Bonnie," he gritted his teeth and then punched a hole in the wall above her head. "Get the fuck out of my house before I do something I'll regret!" And he flung her, none-too-gently towards the door.
Bonnie didn't lose her footing which was a miracle, but she did turn around to face Damon and that's when she saw it. His face crumble and reveal the immeasurable pain he was feeling. His eyes were glassy but no tears fell.
Bonnie had to fight against her natural instinct to comfort him despite knowing he would kill her if she so much attempted to touch him. Taking one final look, she bolted for the door.
BDBDBD
After hearing the recount of what happened, Stefan could only shake his head. "I'm sorry, man."
"Yeah, you're not the only one," Damon replied flatly.
"So what? You guys are over? You're done?"
Damon didn't have an answer to that. "Let's just say it's a hung jury."
The stench of the alley was beginning to make the blood he consumed earlier swish around in his stomach. Damon wanted a drink, but there wasn't enough booze and blood in the world that could suture the gaping wound where his heart and soul was ripped out.
The two brothers left the alley and walked with no set destination in mind.
Damon went over Bonnie's confession a number of times as he picked apart her words, twisting and examining them. There were several things he learned: she kissed her ex, there had been partial nudity on her end, and she allowed him to service her orally. According to Bonnie she didn't go all the way because she realized that she loved him more than Fell's Church Damon. Okay, whatever, she had a fucked up way of showing it. Damon felt more had happened but here was the thing, he did and didn't want to know what else was said and possibly occurred between them.
Why? Why did she go with him? Why would she put herself in that position? That was her first big ass mistake. You do not under any circumstances go to your ex's house alone! Damon was sure that was a written rule somewhere. She did this. This was all her doing. Knowing that the Damon's of the world have a crippling weakness when it came to her, and she used that to her advantage. She played the victim like an award winning actress, controlled their every move like a puppeteer, and had the nerve to try to rationalize with him.
Damon was at his assigned seat at the bar inside The Grille when he finally came out of his reverie. He looked around distractedly wondering how he got here before retreating back inside himself. Bonnie never loved him. She lied to him. She made him fall in love with her as some sort of payback for all the pain and suffering he caused other people. That was apart of her ingenious master plan all along. So who the hell was her accomplice because clearly he was the mark? Was it Bree? Katherine? Elena? Lexi? Countless others whose names he didn't even bother to try to remember? Okay so three out of the four he listed were dead but that didn't mean anything. Bonnie's whole plan from jump street was to make him fall for her and then stomp on his heart in her Converse sneakers.
Mission accomplished.
Bonnie never loved him. She didn't love him. How could she because this whole time they've been together she saw dark-eyed Damon. Yep, dude was right. Bonnie was with him by default.
Damon crushed the shot glass he had been unaware he was holding in his hand. Several people gawked at him and in return he flipped them the bird. A nice stiff one at that.
And thinking of something being stiff inadvertently made him think of the dick his girlfriend could have been riding or did ride.
Damon was vibrating with tension. He needed to let it out. To his luck, a group of local hillbillies sauntered inside, raising cane, burping, belching, and being rowdy much to the other patrons' displeasure. Rolling his shoulders, Damon stood up from the stool ready to plant his fists into meaty flesh.
Bonnie gave him a week. A week of no contact. Besides it went without saying Damon wouldn't accept her phone calls or respond to her text messages anyways. She shared the news of her betrayal with her two best friends who suggested they take an emergency trip to Elena's parent's lake house, but Bonnie refused to budge. What if Damon stopped by to finally talk to her and she was gone? No, she couldn't risk it.
So she went through the motions of life. Attending class but barely paying enough attention to jot down coherent notes. Going to her final dance rehearsal and gown fitting for the cotillion, which was the following weekend. Her life moved forward yet Bonnie was stuck.
Sleep was impossible. Her guilt made every bone and muscle in her body hurt, and she was barely keeping anything down. Bonnie could never understand why anyone would write a song about love hurting, but now she knew what the artist meant. Her entire being felt like it was in physical pain.
She regretted allowing things to go that far with Fell's Church Damon. She had hoped that by getting everything off her chest she'd feel exonerated in that she made the right choice.
But in the wee hours of the morning there were still lingering doubts.
Dark-eyed Damon had made very valid points about blue-eyed Damon's conduct. No she and blue-eyed Damon did not have a conventional start, but who did when you rubbed elbows with vampires? And everything she said to her ex about him loving her for her, and being the friend she needed, that was a good foundation to build a strong and lasting relationship on.
Had she made the right choice?
Her doubts plagued her, anxiety twisted her uncooperative stomach in knots, and shame made it impossible for Bonnie to walk through town with her head held high. Bonnie wanted more than anything to erase that decision, but she couldn't. It was stuck with her. She had to live with it. She hated that things went that far. She despised the fact she had to be the one to hurt her ex and her boyfriend. She hated the fact that she fell in love in the first place because otherwise all parties involved would be spared their pain right now.
When Bonnie thought too much not only did it induce a headache, but it made her yearn for a hot shower. So Bonnie climbed out of bed and paraded into her bathroom to do just that.
Arizona
Dark-eyed Damon Salvatore stared at his cell phone hoping it would ring. It had been a week since the last time he held Bonnie in his arms. He switched his thoughts refusing to believe he was this pathetic. Refusing to believe that once again his heart was tattered to pieces by a teenaged girl, who by rights should be beneath him, and not in the sexual sense.
When he closed his eyes he could still taste her faintly on his tongue. She dumped him. She ended things. She…broke his heart and the stubborn side of him refused to believe that she meant it, that she had been perfectly serious with him. And now due to his impulsiveness he was stuck here without a clear way home.
Real smooth, Damon.
But none of what transpired made sense. He was what she needed, not him. That blue-eyed rabid fool who would only serve to hurt her or get her killed one of these days.
He loved Bonnie first. He was the one who saw the value in her but instead of going with logic and reason, she was basing her choice on what exactly?
Damon wasn't sure, but what he had been sure of was the fact he needed to leave Mystic Falls for a few days, regroup, and get his head together. Love would not make a mockery out of him again. But he feared it was much too late for that.
"Bonnie," he said and closed his eyes wishing he had never left Mystic Falls all those months ago. He wished he had fought harder or at least tried to convince her to come with him. Instead, he let the best thing to ever happen to him slip through his fingers.
This was all his doing, and he was determined to fix it.
Mystic Falls
Damon's knuckles were on fire as he rotated his wrist in a counterclockwise and then clockwise circle. It felt good to beat someone to a bloody pulp. Too bad the cops had to show up.
He stared at Liz drolly as she actually wrote him a citation for public drunkenness, inciting a riot, and disturbing the peace.
She ripped off the ticket and passed it over to Damon. "Be lucky I'm not carting you off to jail, Damon. Whatever the hell is bothering you, I suggest you deal with it and clean up your act."
Damon snorted as he read over his list of charges and the fine amount he was being slapped with. "Yes, mom," he rolled his eyes.
Liz looked him over disappointedly before jumping back in her squad car. The minute she zoomed off Damon had the sudden urge to urinate on the ticket and leave it on her doorstep. Instead, he ripped it up, reached inside his car and pulled out a fresh bottle of whiskey.
The so-called "riot" he started was dispersing as people drunkenly walked to their vehicles or down the block talking way too loud and/or singing off key. A few co-ed's whistled at him but he couldn't even offer up a decent smile. He cricked his neck.
He climbed behind the wheel and leaned back against the head rest. All he had been doing was picking fights with random strangers, attempted to pick up bar harpies but he couldn't follow through. Damon gritted his teeth. By now he should have been over his "little crush" on Bonnie and moved on to bigger and brighter things, but his stubborn heart refused to budge, and was still in mourning over learning the awful truth.
What pissed him off even more was that he went to his adversary's place to have it out and the king of all dicks was nowhere to be found. His luck was astounding.
Damon held the bottle up to his lips and chugged. He wanted to hurt Bonnie just as badly as she hurt him. He even planned out several scenarios in his twisted head about deliberately inviting her over under the pretense of sitting down and having a rational discussion on why she spread her legs for her ex. Of course by the time she arrived with hope dancing in those gorgeous eyes that saw too much—Damon slapped his head to remain detached and focused—he would be buried eight and a half inches deep in another woman.
Even the thought of that alone made him want to whimper like a coyote with a broken leg. He couldn't play that trick in the book, he couldn't hurt her like that which meant he still loved her unfaithful ass.
"Fuck!" He was screwed and it wasn't fair.
Igniting the engine Damon figured it was time to go see her.
BDBDDB
Clicking off the light in her bathroom, Bonnie had to contain her scream when she saw Damon sitting on her bed. He was staring straight ahead and she noticed he was dangling a bottle of whiskey between his legs.
"Sit."
She hesitated before crossing the room and taking a tentative seat next to him. Damon handed her a shot glass and filled it.
"Drink."
Bonnie hated whiskey but if he wanted her to drink she'd do it if it meant he was ready to talk to her. She consumed the murky brown fluid in one swallow and nearly gagged.
Damon poured himself a shot and easily downed it like water. They were quiet for a while.
"What did I do wrong?" he finally broke the silence.
Bonnie turned a little to face him yet could only view his profile. Damon had yet to look directly at her and she was sure it was a defense tactic.
"You didn't do anything. What happened wasn't me trying to get back at you for something you did. It was a mistake, a moment of weakness."
Damon reloaded their glasses. "Do you want to be with him?" he asked after tossing back the booze.
It took a second longer than necessary for Bonnie to respond only because her throat was burning as a result of the alcohol.
"No, I don't."
"See that's the thing I want to believe you, but I can't," he shook his head sadly. "I've done my share of foul shit you know that, and I've been trying to justify what went down between you and him and give you a pass, and say all is forgiven." He finally looked at her then.
Bonnie tried not to bristle. There was no warmth in his gaze, no understanding, only pain, hurt, bitterness, and seething anger.
"But every time I close my eyes I see the two of you rolling around and laughing at what a fool you made out of me, Bonnie."
"Damon…"
He cut her off, "I know I have a reputation of being a womanizer and an asshole, but I have loved exactly three women my whole life: my mother, Katherine, and you, and all three of you have broken my heart. How do you expect me to get past this?" he raised his voice.
Bonnie looked down at her trembling hands. This was new territory for her and she didn't know what to say that could magically make everything better. Yet she would try.
"I don't. I don't expect you to get past this…at least not now."
"If I break up with you you'll just run off to him. If we stay together I'll feel like you're with me out of obligation. What am I supposed to do?"
Resisting touching him was hard, but Bonnie couldn't chance upsetting him more than he already was so she clasped her hands together. "I had an opportunity to leave and I didn't because I love you. Damon, I wish I could take it all back and saying 'I'm sorry' isn't going to cut it, but I am. Please," a tear fell from her eye and landed on the back of her hand. "Give me a chance to make things right."
Damon stared at her in partial disbelief. "Why?"
"Because I'm in love with you, and we've been through so much we can't just…let it end like this."
He laughed derisively. "You're still in love with him," he countered.
"No, I'm not," Bonnie quickly refuted.
"Don't lie to me!"
Again she tried not to recoil. "I'm not!" Bonnie took his hand and placed it right on her heart. "This belongs to you," she stared at him beseechingly. "And so does everything else about me. For two minutes I allowed myself to forget that and I'll never forgive myself for it. Just…tell me what I can do to make things better."
Damon snatched his hand away from her and got up from the bed. He ran his hands through his hair. "I want to believe you. I want to forgive you…but something in me won't let me."
Bonnie joined him by getting to her feet as well. "Okay, so we'll just take things one day at time. We'll move slow. I'm willing to do whatever is necessary to get your trust back."
"It's not going to be that simple. You can't say you're sorry and think that's going to be enough to fix everything."
"I know," Bonnie lowered her eyes. "But I have to try somewhere." Pause. "Do you…do you still want to be with me?"
Damon brought his eyes on his girlfriend. She appeared so small and waif like, nothing like the powerful and strong witch goddess she had been only two weeks ago. He approached her and braced his hands on her shoulders. He frowned when he felt Bonnie stiffen at his touch. The last time they saw each other he did manhandle her and he felt a twinge of guilt about that yet he brushed it off. He could have done a lot worse than what he did, but still pushing her was out of line.
"That's my problem, Bonnie," Damon admitted. "I still want to be with you. I still want to love you, and I still want you to love me. But I can't…"
"We can get past this, we can make it through this," Bonnie murmured reassuringly and laid her hands on his chest. "We can but the both of us has to be willing."
"You broke us," Damon said on a choked sob.
"I…know…"
His eyes dipped to her lips. It was irrational for as much as he wanted to her hurt all he could really think about was kissing her.
"How sorry are you?" he asked.
Bonnie appeared perplexed by the question. "Sorry enough to promise to cut all ties of communication and to stay away from him."
"Promises aren't going to cut it this time, Bonnie."
She dropped her eyes again.
Being this close to her, smelling her skin, feeling her warmth knowing she just had a shower was waking up another appetite. How could he still want her like this? This was sorcery in its purest form, Damon thought as he pushed her on the bed and joined her. Bonnie's heart changed rhythm.
"I want to get past this," he whispered and slid his fingers along her throat before clasping it.
"And we will," Bonnie said wiggling to get closer to him.
Damon kissed her neck and Bonnie's eyes fluttered closed. When he looked at her again, it was no longer Bonnie's face he was seeing but Katherine smiling sinisterly at him.
"No matter what I say, it's never going to be you, Damon."
The vampire in question blinked. "What?"
Bonnie's eyes opened and she stared at him curiously. "I didn't say anything."
Katherine's image took over Bonnie's face again. "His dick was the best I ever had."
Damon's hand on Bonnie's neck tightened and she squirmed against him. "Damon?"
He shook his head, unsure of what was going on. He narrowed his eyes to make sure that the person underneath him was Bonnie and not Katherine. But then the face shifted and he was now staring at Elena.
"I care about you, Damon, but it's not love. I could never love you above him."
He shut his eyes and tried to dim the volume in his ears. He resumed kissing Bonnie's neck again, more aggressively and unconsciously tightened his hold on it, to block that image. To deny her words.
Laughter ensued in his head as the voices of his father and everyone else who mocked him, belittled him, came rushing to the surface bringing along all his old wounds and insecurities. Bonnie had played him like a fiddle the same way Katherine did only Bonnie was more cunning in that she actually convinced him her love was genuine. Maybe he had too much to drink and should go home and sleep it off, but he couldn't make himself leave this room.
Love, he wanted love, all his life it seemed and no matter how much he gave of himself to others they always played him for a fool.
Lie, that's all people ever did to him was lie to him. He wanted Bonnie to be different. She had been different but now she fell into the same category as everyone else.
Something was scratching at him but his attention was elsewhere. He was kissing her collarbone, still holding on to her neck. He couldn't let go of what in his possession because Bonnie was still very much his and there was no way in the world he could let her go.
He had done so much for her, almost changed who he was and it wasn't enough. Oh, sure Bonnie and everyone else might think that he only started to like her once she entered into a relationship with dark-eyed Damon, but that wasn't the catalyst. She opened up his eyes to the fact he had deserved love his entire life, essentially told him to get over Katherine because he deserved better, and she had done so at a time where she had every reason in the book to hate him. She changed him, she cursed him, she damned him, and she saved him.
But then she broke him. His hand squeezed the smooth column of her neck.
Yet it wasn't enough to make him let her go. If he had held on to her tighter perhaps she never would have strayed. Lesson learned; he wouldn't let her go again.
But that was the difficult part, forgiving her, because he had a vindictive streak a mile wide.
A wheezed breath caught his attention and Damon lifted off Bonnie.
She wasn't moving. Her eyes were rolled into the back of her head. Several blood vessels in her eyes had burst turning the sclera pink. Damon's eyes dropped to her mouth, which was parted open but he didn't feel nor heard any breath escape. Lower his eyes moved and noticed the absent rise and fall of her chest. He couldn't hear her heart beating.
"Oh, God!" he said when he finally realized this whole time he had been choking her.
Damon was momentarily paralyzed as he tried to figure out what to do. So he stood immobile for a moment staring at Bonnie. He couldn't have…he couldn't have killed her! No, he would never do that! He was mad. He was hurt. He was pissed. But he would never…
Damon jolted up in bed. Eyes wild as he looked around and then brought his hands up to his face. They were clean, devoid of blood but a person doesn't necessarily bleed when they're being choked to death. He moved like the wind as he got out of bed, threw on his discarded pair of jeans and shirt, heart hammering, mouth tasting like cotton, head pounding. He had to make it over to Bonnie's. This was all just a dream. A nightmare. A figment of his perverse imagination. He wouldn't…
He didn't trust himself to drive and besides his car would have moved too slow. Damon ran like the hounds of hell were chomping at his ankles as he moved through town like a phantom. When he stood outside of Bonnie's he flew inside, again moving faster than conscious thought.
The light was still on in her bedroom and the door was partially ajar. Damon pushed the door open, resistant to see what was on the other side.
Her bed was empty. The half finished bottle of whiskey and two shot glasses sat on the floor near the foot of the bed where they left them. The duvet cover was rumpled, not pulled back signifying Bonnie had been under it. He sampled the air and caught whiffs of his scent co-mingled with hers. But she was nowhere to be found.
Did he bury her? He wasn't sure. But knowing him he might have hid her body. Damon checked under the bed which was too low to the ground for anyone to be placed under, but that wouldn't have stopped him from being creative.
He found nothing but dust bunnies and a few pairs of shoes. Maybe he put her in the bathtub. He checked. Nothing.
Damon went through her entire house and found no trace of her. Pushing his fingers in his hair, he had no choice but to check the backyard. He gulped heavily, feeling his anxiety prickle his scalp.
Opening the back door, Damon came to a stop when he saw a figure sitting on the ground with a throw blanket wrapped around its shoulders. Maybe he propped her up as some cruel joke to give the impression she was star gazing when really she was dead. There was only one way to find out.
"Bonnie?"
There was no reply.
His boots crunched the grass as he tentatively approached.
"Bonnie?" he touched her shoulder.
Bonnie let out a piercing scream before scrambling away. She glared up at Damon and slipped the earphones of her iPod out of her ears.
Breathlessly she asked, "What are you doing?"
"What are you doing?" he asked tersely. Relief flooded him that he hadn't strangled her but it was easily replaced with fresh anger.
"I was trying to clear my head." Bonnie got to her feet and tightened her hold on her blanket. After her talk with Damon she couldn't go to sleep even though she was exhausted. Damon had left not agreeing fully to give her a chance to rebuild what they had, but he didn't say their relationship was over, either.
Damon wanted to pull her into a hug but he couldn't. He didn't trust himself. The fact he could dream about killing her made him feel, well like a vampire, and it was odd because he hadn't felt like one in a while.
"You should get back in the house. It's late," he complained and then turned to walk off.
Bonnie followed him. She didn't understand why he would return to her house. "Did something happen?" she asked automatically assuming something of a supernatural nature was wrong.
Damon shook his head and then stopped at the threshold. He stepped aside so Bonnie could enter her home. "Nothing is wrong. Just…go to bed."
Bonnie stared at him expectantly. "If nothing is wrong why did you come back here?"
Guilt made him stare at his feet. "No reason."
"I know you, Damon. What's going on?"
He lifted his head, nostrils slightly flaring. She shouldn't be presumptuous to still think she had a right to throw in his face the fact she did know him. Not after the shit she pulled.
"Truthfully I don't owe you any gotdamn explanations. Just go to bed," he snarled and then ghosted away.
Salvatore Boardinghouse
Stefan stood in front of his mirror adjusting his tie against his deep indigo shirt. He twisted a few strands of his caramel hair until it reached China. He then swiped his tongue over one of his slightly protruding fangs.
He was going to feed tonight and it would be his little secret. Say what you want about him but he wasn't dull and boring like a box of rocks as many have pegged him to be—his brother included. Stefan had conditioned himself to be human after taking so many human lives that he stifled and denied himself simple pleasures in many areas.
That was now over. Thank the heavens. If Jonas Martin hadn't been roasted alive, Stefan supposed he could send the man a thank you card for somehow breaking Elijah's compulsion. His hunger had returned ten-fold and Stefan indulged and had no intentions of letting anyone know that the ripper in him was scratching at the surface. Besides, he couldn't blow his cover because once he did the morality police would be on him.
A cocky smirk curled his lips. If his darling little girlfriend knew what he would be up to tonight she would have probably offer up her own veins to keep others alive. Or fainted. Or cried. Or shown any number of annoying human emotions to manipulate him to do what she wanted. Elena was a sweet girl with an even sweeter ass but he wanted more than nights spent eating dinner with her patchwork family, watching old movies reliving the "good ole days", and holding her while she drifted off to sleep. He was old but she had a tendency to make him feel decrepit.
Yet he supposed he loved her because she humanized him, held him accountable during his moments of madness when he did horrible things to people.
But hello…he was a vampire and that was part of his job description.
Stefan moistened his lips already tasting blood but was distracted by the front door opening and closing. Damon just slipped out. Good. He wasn't in the mood to deal with him or his man pain.
His cell phone rang. Groaning, he picked it up and his eyes went heavenward. He answered.
"Hello, Elena."
"Hey, Stefan. I know we promised to give each other the night off, but Alaric is taking Jenna out tonight, and Jeremy is studying at a friend's house. I have the place to myself so…" and she deliberately let her thought trail off so he could fill in the blank.
As tempting as it was Stefan already knew the drill. Elena could be a tease. She had a way of making it appear that if he behaved himself and minded his manners that he would score, but nope, she would make him settle with kissing until both of their lips were raw and swollen, and when she was feeling particularly naughty—for her anyways—he might be permitted to finger her. They didn't have sex; they made love, cue another eye roll, and making love only happened after he took her out.
She really needed to go find a spontaneous sex bone somewhere in her body.
"I'd love to come over," he placed the right amount of yearning in his voice, "but Damon is having a hard time and well, you know me. I want to be there for my brother."
"Oh," cue Elena's crushing disappointment and pout. "Well if anything should change, you know where to find me."
"Yes, I do," Stefan checked his appearance and smiled.
"Well, I'll let you get back to cheering up your brother. Call me later?"
"Mm-hmm."
"Love you."
"Right back at you." He hung up the phone and tossed it. Things would work better if he left it behind.
The following week Bonnie did what she could to stay busy, which wasn't difficult. After Damon's bizarre behavior the night of their talk, she felt it safe to text him to let him know that she was thinking about him. Of course disappointment stabbed her when he didn't return her texts with at least a one word response or a smiley face icon. No matter. She would just pester him like he took pleasure in doing when she wasn't trying to give him the time of day.
She took to doing her homework at The Grill hoping to run into him since it was his home away from home. The first time he saw her sitting at a table—alone—he naturally began to approach her, but then remembered they were fighting, and parked his tush on his favorite barstool which should have his name on it by now. Even though Bonnie wanted to talk to him, wanted things to go back to the way they were before she screwed up, for now she could accept staring at him from afar.
Then she noticed she wasn't the only one.
Several women would approach him, introduce themselves and then offer to buy him a drink. Bonnie would watch with daggers shooting out of her eyes as Damon would proceed to accept free drinks from strange women, women who were much older but not as pretty as her.
Bonnie admonished herself. There was no need for her to tear down someone else's looks to make herself feel better. But it was a tough pill to swallow to sit there and observe her boyfriend, she guessed they were still together since he never outright said it was over, chat up and flirt with these women knowing full well she was watching.
This medicine he was serving was acrid and bitter and Bonnie took it all in stride. Her day would come. He couldn't stay mad at her forever. Or maybe in his case he could.
On the night before she was to depart for Richmond to attend the cotillion, Bonnie was once again at the Grill this time dressed in something more eye catching than jeans and a T-shirt. She had shunned her usual uniform and replaced it with a black wrap dress and the ankle boots she wore to her birthday party. She flat ironed her hair thinking the curls made her look too young and innocent, when clearly she was anything but, and she was very liberal with her black eyeliner. She left her lips nude, only added clear lip gloss, and hosed herself down with the brand of perfume Damon preferred to smell on her skin.
As soon as she walked into The Grill, keeping her eyes away from the bar, she pulled out her cell phone and called Caroline.
"Hey, where are you? I don't see you."
"I should have called you earlier. I won't be able to make it. My mom is sick and she's actually letting me take care of her," Caroline snorted good-naturedly.
Bonnie made sure her face held the right amount of disappointment. "Oh, well tell her I said I hope she feels better. Since I'm here I might as well stay and get a bite to eat. I'll talk to you later, Care."
"Okay, Bon. Have a good night."
Slipping her phone back in her purse, Bonnie headed over to her favorite table, which she told Matt ahead of time to keep vacant because it offered an unobstructed view of the bar. She slid into a seat and placed her purse on the table. She looked around the establishment before bringing her attention to the bar.
Yep, Damon was there tonight. He wasn't looking at her, but from the rigid set of his shoulders, Bonnie knew he was fully aware that she was present.
A waiter came over and dropped a menu before her. He was new and cute. And his eyes lit up with appreciation and interest.
"Hey, welcome to Mystic Grill, I'm Brandon and I'll be your server tonight. Are you dining alone?"
"Yes, unfortunately."
"I'm surprised. A beautiful girl like you should never eat alone."
Bonnie lowered her eyes to the table and blushed. She didn't dare look at Damon to see if he was watching.
Brandon cleared his throat and then remembered his professionalism. "Can I start you off with a drink?"
"Yeah, can I have a ginger ale?"
"Sure," Brandon nodded and pulled out his pad and pen. "Would you like to hear tonight's specials?"
"No thanks. I usually get the same thing so I'll just have a Caesar salad with grilled chicken strips."
Brandon jotted down her order. "Anything for dessert?"
That's when Bonnie finally looked towards the bar again and Damon was looking right at her. "I have a taste for vanilla ice cream."
Damon narrowed his eyes and looked away.
Bonnie directed her attention back to Brandon and offered him a wry smile.
She was being a complete and total bitch, Damon seethed. She knew good and damn well that vanilla ice cream was code for his well... jizz. And annoyingly his cock had to twitch in his pants as he was brutally reminded of all the times he spoon fed her. And then she had the audacity to waltz in here wearing his favorite color, perfume, and looking hotter than hell. Bitch!
All week he had taken immense pleasure in the fact he could ignore her calls and little loving text messages declaring how much she missed him, how much she hoped he'd have a good day, and of course she couldn't resist telling him that she loved him.
He cared, but he didn't care. He wasn't going to yield. He wasn't going to give in and allow her free reign with his heart and soul. No, she was going to have to earn it the old fashioned way—groveling on her hands and knees.
Another scintillating image assaulted him. Damon ordered another drink.
Bonnie finished her meal, paid the bill, freshened up her lip gloss, and popped a mint in her mouth. Taking in a large gulp of air she felt it safe to approach Damon. All throughout her meal she caught him stealing glances at her as she ate deliberately slowly and adding in little sighs and moans here and there.
The clicking of her heels against the hardwood floor announced her arrival. Still he made no move to flee or to acknowledge her.
"Hello, Damon."
"Bonnie."
She bit her lip nervously, "I don't want to take up too much of your time, but I just wanted to remind you that tomorrow I'm heading up to Richmond for the cotillion. I have your invitation if you still want to come."
Damon didn't take his eyes away from the shelves of bottles that lined the wall behind the bar. He shrugged. "I don't think I can make it."
Bonnie nodded and shifted her weight from one foot to the other. Silence engulfed the area between them. Sighing, Bonnie dug around in her purse and pulled out the invitation and slid it across the bar towards him.
"If you change your mind," she said quietly and felt her nose tickle. She promised herself that no matter what she wouldn't cry, but she wasn't used to getting the cold shoulder from him and nothing hurt worse than to be treated as if you're nothing by the one you love. But then again, she supposed that's how Damon felt she treated him.
Damon stared at the card dispassionately before looking into her eyes. He could see her pain and regret yet also hope and determination. He wasn't in the mood to be gracious and tell her all wasn't lost between them.
"You should head home before the street lights come on, kid."
The jab about her age did smart, yet Bonnie took it. She squared her shoulders. "It would mean a lot if you did come, but no pressure. I know you have far more important things to do like drink your weight in liquor. I'll leave you to it, then."
And she stormed off with what dignity she had left. Her waterworks had turned on as she marched across the parking lot to her car. Bonnie hit the unlock button on her remote, slid behind the wheel and allowed a few tears to roll down her cheeks before wiping them away.
Her phone started ringing.
"Yeah," Bonnie answered.
"So how did it go?"
Bonnie shook her head. "He won't look at me, Caroline. He won't talk to me. He hates me. I should just…"
"He doesn't hate you," Caroline interrupted. "He and his pride are just mad and hurt. Give it more time."
Bonnie didn't speak right away. "Well, it was a good plan…you pretending to stand me up…too bad it didn't have the desired effect. I need to get home before the street lights come on," Bonnie snorted derisively and placed her key in the ignition.
"Ooh, maybe you should head over to his place and let him find you naked in bed. Make up sex is so hot!"
"I don't think I can handle being rejected and dismissed twice in the same night. I know I screwed up and if he had done the same thing to me…there's no telling what I might have done, or how I might have reacted. So I guess I should consider it a miracle he hasn't outright dumped me although I feel like I have been dumped."
"But until he makes things official, still continue to do what you have to, to make it up to him. But don't turn yourself into his doormat. You have limits, remember that."
"You're right," Bonnie let out a tired sigh. "Let me get home."
"Call me when you make it there."
"All right. Talk to you later."
"Bye, chica."
Bonnie threw her car in reverse and then pulled out of the parking lot. Damon stepped out of the shadows watching her taillights fade away.
Damon would never admit that he drove forty miles above the posted speed limit on his way home. No because then that would mean he thought Bonnie might have had a change of heart and do what her friend suggested about breaking into his house to wait for him naked in his bed. If he admitted that he felt a small twinge of excitement and anticipation course through him then that would make him weak.
But still, he pressed his foot on the gas. However, when he turned into the driveway there was no sign of Bonnie's car.
Shutting off the engine, Damon walked inside at a leisurely pace and took the stairs one at a time to his room, shoulders slumped.
There was something on his bed, but it wasn't a naked Bonnie. It was a brand new leather jacket.
And not just any leather jacket but a Diesel 'Leide' Extra Trim Fit Crinkled leather jacket in navy. Damon almost creamed himself. On the inside there was an inscription sown into the fabric that read: From Bonnie.
"Un-hun. Okay," he said and placed the jacket back on the bed ready to write off this obvious bribe. He marched into this bathroom, brushed and flossed his teeth, trimmed his nose hair, pondered if it was time to get a hair cut, and then stepped back into his bedroom.
The leather jacket was still there whispering his name. Damon ignored it. He went into the basement, got a blood bag, heated it up, went into the library and selected a book, and then found himself in his room once again eyeing that stupid jacket.
"Okay, I'll try you on just once but that doesn't mean I'm keeping you. Salvation Army, or Goodwill here you come."
Damon slid his arms into the fitted sleeves of the jacket and shrugged it on his shoulders. This stupid thing had been tailored to perfection—his perfection. He walked into the bathroom to check out his appearance. He turned to the side and back to check out the awesome stitch detail and the zippers on the sleeves that came to the elbow. The navy leather made his eyes even more electric. This jacket was badass to the extreme and had Tony Stark written all over it.
"Damn her," he muttered.
She always knew right where to hit him.
"This changes nothing," Damon promised himself as he slid the jacket off and then hung it up in his closet where it would be easily accessible. "Nothing," he reaffirmed and switched off the light, but was back two seconds later just to admire the jacket again. "Nothing."
Chapter end.
A/N: So I think it will be a nice pace to have someone pursue Damon for a bit. To clear up any confusion about the Bamon "talk" scene, they did have that discussion and afterwards Damon went home, had a dream about it, replaying their words verbatim only in his dream he ended up accidentally choking her. So the discussion did happen between them. I hope I just didn't confuse you guys more lol. And I added in a taste of Ripper Stefan. We will see a little more of him next chapter. Sadly, there are only three chapters left and then this baby will be complete. But thank you guys from the bottom of my heart for sticking it out and getting me through the rough patches I had. Until next time, love you!
