Chapter 51
"Agent McGee," Tamara said, in surprise. "You're looking well."
"Thank you."
"Levi is in the yard. Would you like to come back?"
"Sure. Thanks."
They started walking through the house.
"Levi told me that he picked up your girlfriend from the airport."
Tim smiled and nodded.
"Yes."
"How is it going?"
"Good so far," Tim said. "I can only hope it keeps up. It wouldn't be an easy life for her, but right now, she says she wants it."
Tamara stopped him. He turned and looked at her.
"I hope that you do find your way through. I don't know much about your life, but if you've been involved with Levi, I know it's been complicated. Please, don't use Levi as a model of how to manage a family and a career. What he did was try to protect us, only at the expense of everything else. You don't have to do that. I can't tell you how many times I've wished Levi would have done something else with his life or else just stopped thinking he had to save the world. Don't keep her out because you think it's too dangerous for her."
"What if it is?"
Tamara smiled sadly. "Speaking from personal experience, I would rather have faced the danger than the isolation. If she loves you, she'll feel the same way."
"Until it becomes real."
Tamara shook her head. "No, Agent McGee. It's not like that at all. Levi said that you were injured. If it had been because of your girlfriend and you could have avoided it by not being with her, would you?"
"It's not quite the same."
"No, it's not. What I'm asking you is about an injury you actually had, not about a hypothetical event at some nebulous time in the future. You can evaluate your own response to a real event."
"I was glad I was there," Tim said.
"Exactly. Don't you think she'd feel the same way?"
"I guess I don't want someone else's life in my hands."
"With what you undoubtably do, Agent McGee, you'll always have someone's life in your hands. At least, let someone be there who wants to be. Levi and I are making progress, but it's hard, every step of the way. Your life doesn't have to be our life. I don't wish it on anyone."
Tim smiled.
"Levi said the same thing to me, once. A few years ago."
"What did he say?"
"That I didn't have to be him."
"Really?"
"Yes."
Tamara smiled wistfully. "Every so often, something happens that gives me more hope."
"Is it worth it? What you're doing?"
"Yes. It is. I wish you could have known him before the CIA. He was so warm, so earnest, but always honest. And I still see it in him sometimes." She took a breath. "Anyway, he's just back here."
Tim stepped out into the backyard and he was surprised to see Carew kneeling in a garden, apparently weeding. It was just so incongruous to see him doing something so...simple.
"Levi, Agent McGee is here to see you," Tamara said.
Carew turned and stood.
"Agent McGee, what brings you here?"
"I just needed to talk to you for a few minutes. I don't want to interrupt."
"That's what you said before," Carew said, wryly. "And I ended up going to Morocco."
"Well, I didn't call you. I was dying of a stab wound at the time. That interruption was Daniel's fault."
"True."
Carew walked over to a small patio and sat down on a chair. Tim joined him while Tamara went back inside.
"What is it?" Carew asked.
"First," Tim said and held out the travel bag Carew had given him, "I wanted to return the money I didn't use. I'm sorry that it never got changed back to dollars, but I was a little distracted."
Carew took the bag and opened it up.
"There's still quite a bit in here."
"Yes. I was frugal. I didn't buy any souvenirs."
Carew smiled slightly.
"It wasn't necessary to return it," he said.
"It wasn't necessary to give it in the first place," Tim said. "I didn't even notice."
"Yes. I was pretty pleased with how that turned out. It's always a trick to get people to do something without realizing it."
"I didn't end up using the credit cards at all. It felt safer to use cash."
"Probably wise, although these particular cards wouldn't have pointed anyone to you."
"I figured, but cash was easier once I got used to dirhams."
"Was there anything else?"
"Yes, some questions."
"What makes you think I'll answer them?" Carew asked.
"You may not. Doesn't mean I can't ask."
Carew nodded and then gestured. "Go ahead."
"You played a big role in getting Jorgenson to stop coming after me."
Carew sat there for a few seconds, and then, he smiled that empty smile.
"Yes? I'm waiting for the question."
"How? Besides the things you could talk about. I know that you were determined not to let what happened two years ago ever be known."
"It's still unknown."
"But how did you do that?"
"Without giving details, let's just say that I have a rather firm political hold on Jorgenson when I need to. I used it to make sure that he didn't use that time period against you."
"How would he have known about it?"
"He doesn't. But there was a major security breach that happened at about the same time as my op. How it happened and who did it is still unknown, even now. That's one of the reasons the NSA has been asking for your help so much. They want to keep that kind of thing from happening again. Jorgenson was hoping to use your disappearance to pin that on you."
Tim felt a cold weight in his stomach. With how secret their work in Yemen had been, that would have been Jorgenson's strongest claim. He really might have been convicted just on that basis if Carew hadn't stepped in.
"Oh," Tim said. He found that he couldn't really say anything else.
"That's why I made sure he didn't. It would put too much at risk...and I have to admit that it was extremely enjoyable to watch him squirm. Beyond that, I simply gave requested testimony. When the President summons you to a meeting, you go."
"Do you?"
"Yes. Even I go," Carew said. "You could ask anyone. I never missed a meeting with the President."
Tim nodded. That fit with what he knew of Carew's general approach to life.
"I heard that you punched Jorgenson in the face."
Carew smiled, and even without him answering, Tim could see that it was true. There was genuine glee in that smile.
"Not in the meeting."
"What happened?"
"He tried to threaten me, and I simply let him know that it was a bad idea. I don't think I actually broke his nose."
"I wish I could have been there."
"I wouldn't recommend that you try it yourself. You have a lot more in the game than I do."
Tim had to admit that it was true.
"How did you get the plane to get me home again?" he asked, switching gears. "I know that it's an expensive plane and that it must have been a major inconvenience for the owner. How big a favor were you owed?"
"Actually, I think he would have done it without the favor. Not because of me, but because of you."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean that you made an impression."
"I made an..." Tim trailed off. "The copilot?"
Carew smiled again. "Yes. I told him that he couldn't know where the plane was going unless he was with the plane, and he doesn't like to flaunt his wealth around, so he didn't want to simply be a passenger who was obviously there because the plane was his. So he generally flies as the copilot."
"I wondered how he could have so much influence in the airport. It wasn't just about bribes."
"Most of it probably was. Regardless, all I had to do was ask for it. Was there anything else, Agent McGee?"
Tim debated whether or not he wanted to ask about what Carew had told Zahara. On the one hand, she hadn't said that he told her to hide it, but on the other hand, he had chosen to tell Zahara, not Tim himself.
"Are you happy?" Tim asked, finally.
There was a long silence and a look of faint surprise on Carew's face.
"Since when do you care about whether or not I'm happy, Agent McGee?"
"Since I found out that you're a real person with emotion, whether you choose to show it or not," Tim said. "Since I realized that you've done things for me without any real expectation. Don't get me wrong, I don't know if I can forgive you for pushing me into nearly killing myself to build that program again. You manipulated me when I was at a point of real weakness and you exploited me to get what you wanted. I know you wouldn't have done it if you didn't think it was necessary, but I don't know if I can forgive you for that. It almost ruined me."
"I know. There's no reason you should," Carew said, bluntly. "I'm surprised that's the only thing you're mentioning."
Momentarily distracted from his initial question, Tim found himself smiling.
"I put myself in your hands after that. You didn't make me come to you for help. I chose it, and you only called in the favor for something you really needed help with. You also forced me to get the help I needed. No one else managed to do that because they hoped they could just convince me to agree, but I was too far gone to ever just agree. You put someone in my path that you knew would be too perfect to pass up. You set things up so that I would get help. It was sneaky and underhanded, but it was something I really needed. So yes, the one thing I can't forgive you for is making me build the program, but even there, you stopped me from killing my handler when I thought it was what I wanted. So I'll ask again. Are you happy?"
Carew took a breath and let it out slowly.
"I haven't really thought about it, to be honest."
Tim looked at him skeptically.
"Agent McGee, when a man makes a decision to put everything in his life aside, that includes thinking about happiness, because he knows he won't be and that's the decision he's made. It does no good to dwell on it. However, at this point, Tamara is here and we're making a go of it, so I'm probably as close to happy as I could be."
"Would you marry her again?"
"We're a long ways from that."
"Only because you think you can't. I think Tamara would marry you if you got to the point where you dared ask. From what I've seen of her, she's amazing woman."
Carew's smile was a little different.
"She is, but I'm not to that point yet. Are you?"
Tim smiled, self-consciously. "I am, but she's not."
"Are you sure of that?"
"Yes. I'm not going to put it off, but I want to give her some time to settle into the United States, see if it's really what she wants."
Carew raised an eyebrow again. "Seems to me that she's already decided what she really wants. If she hadn't, she wouldn't be here. She's had plenty of chances to leave."
Tim shook his head. "It's too fast. Too soon for anything like that."
"I realize that you have no interest in my advice, Agent McGee, but why give up time that you could have with her? You know how quickly life can change. Remember that you're playing the game only against yourself. You don't have to be like me and spend your life deliberately trying to lose."
Tim cocked his head to the side and considered Carew carefully. There was an earnestness in his eyes that took Tim by surprise. His black eyes were usually blank or seemingly amused. Tim could almost believe that Carew was sincerely trying to encourage him to take a step he had been pushing off into the future. It was also interesting that Carew was telling him basically the same thing that Tamara had.
"You know...it just occurred to me that we're both headed for the same basic goal," Tim said.
Carew smiled slightly. "If that's the case, Agent McGee, like most things in life, we're coming at it from opposite ends of the spectrum."
Tim nodded and stood up. Carew stood as well.
"I hope you get there," he said and held out his hand.
"Do you really?" Carew asked with some skepticism.
"Yes, I do," Tim said. "I can't hate you anymore. It would be easier if I could, but I can't. ...and I hope that you figure out how to be happy again...Levi."
Carew's smile warmed and he shook Tim's hand.
"If that's sincere, then, I'll thank you for your good wishes," he said.
Tim started to walk toward the front of the house, but Carew stopped him for a moment.
"And if you ever need anything that I can give, you just need to ask. No favor necessary."
Tim turned back, and where it came from, he'd never know, but he knew that it was sincere, as bizarre as it felt to him to be saying it.
"Same here, Levi," he said. "If I can do it, I will."
Then, he left and got back into his car. For a few minutes, he just sat there, thinking about what he'd learned, about what he'd said and about what he'd seen in Levi and Tamara.
Mentally, he added one more stop to his list of places to go. Then, he got out of his car and walked over to the car just down the block, the one belonging to his CIA guards. He leaned down.
"Yes, Agent McGee?"
Tim smiled. This wasn't the same person as before he'd left.
"I'd like your opinion."
"About what?"
"What would happen if I went to the FBI right about now?"
"You'd be gambling for very high stakes. Why?"
"Because I've never actually been in the same place as Jorgenson and I want to confront him."
"What good will that do, Agent McGee?"
"It'll make me feel better."
The agent sighed heavily, and Tim grinned.
"I could tell you to just take the rest of the day off."
"Don't give me that, Agent McGee. You know that I can't do that. If anything happened to you, I'd never see the light of day again."
Tim grinned again and the agent rolled his eyes.
"Is there any way I could talk you out of it? Appeal to your intelligence? Anything?"
"Nope."
Another sigh.
"Fine. Thanks for telling me, at least."
"You're welcome," Tim said.
Then, he walked back to his car and drove to the FBI. He found Jorgenson's car and leaned against it, prepared to wait for however long it would take. He decided it probably wouldn't be the best idea to actually go inside.
But while he waited, he pulled out his phone and dialed an international number.
"Alū, Anqalaysūn Real Estate, this is Daniel Worthing."
"You still sound very professional, Daniel."
"Tim! You sound like you're back to normal."
"Mostly."
"I'm glad. Really. And I'm really happy that you called me. No one ever thought to give me an update and I wanted to know how you were doing."
"I'm sorry I didn't before. I could have."
"Eh, you've had a lot on your mind. How's Zahara?"
"Good."
"How good?" Daniel asked, and Tim could hear his grin.
"Very."
"Excellent."
"How are things going for you?"
"Very good. I finally got to the point that I can realistically get my dad here. We're in the process of making plans now. Hopefully, in another couple of months, we'll get him back to Marrakech one more time."
"That's great, Daniel. I'm really happy for you."
"Thanks. Do you miss Marrakech?"
"Honestly?"
Daniel laughed. "Don't worry. You don't have to. Just because I know it's the most wonderful place in the world, doesn't mean I expect everyone to be as smart."
"I'll remember that."
"Good. So did everything work out?"
"Pretty much. I'm about to push my limits to see just how well it's worked out."
"Push the limits? What do you mean?"
"I mean that I'm leaning on Director Jorgenson's car and I'm waiting for him to show up so I can berate him to my heart's content."
"Are you sure that's a good idea, Tim?"
"Nope, but right now, I just don't care. He has pushed me around for years and I'm tired of taking it."
"Well, good luck. I hope that doesn't get you into trouble."
"I'm moderately certain it won't."
"Moderately?"
"Yes."
"Well, give me a call when you're done and let me know if I have to call in the cavalry."
"Will do."
Then, he heard the elevator ding and he hung up and turned toward the sound. There he was. Tim considered whether he would get out of sight or brazenly wait in plain sight.
He smiled and leaned casually against the car.
Brazen it would be.
He saw the moment Jorgenson noticed him and realized who he was. Then, if looks could kill, Tim would be dead, but Tim himself just smiled more widely.
"Good afternoon, Director. You're leaving work a bit early, aren't you?"
"What do you want, Agent McGee? To gloat about your good fortune?"
"In part. Both you and I deserve it."
Jorgenson glanced at him as if he was surprised Tim would admit to it.
"Mostly, though, I wanted to give you a warning."
"A warning?"
"Yes," Tim said, his voice hardening. "You have spent a lot of time trying to control me over the last few years and you have failed every time. I've been playing by the rules for all this time, trying to get things done right. If you try for me again, you won't find me so amenable to manipulation. You've tried to ruin my life over and over and I won't stand for it any longer."
"Oh, really, and how do you propose to avoid it...should this happen?" Jorgenson asked him in a cold voice.
"I'll leave that to your imagination, but I will be very clear: leave me alone."
"Or what?"
Tim leaned in close to him. "Or you'll live to regret it."
"Are you threatening me, Agent McGee? That could be a crime, you know. Do you want to risk arrest?"
"I'm not threatening at all. I've given you a friendly warning because you have committed crimes, just in your attempts to take me from my life. I am sick and tired of having to deal with your crap. At no point have I ever betrayed my country, no matter how many times my country has tried to betray me. And you failed, Director. You failed again. You have failed every time and you just added one more colossal failure to the list. Give it up and leave me alone. That's all I have to say."
Tim started to walk away.
"I'm armed, Agent McGee."
Tim stopped and turned around. Jorgenson was holding a gun in his hand, although he wasn't yet pointing it at Tim. He had spoken very casually and his stance was ostensibly casual as well. For a moment, Tim felt a chill, but he refused to give into that. Instead, he smiled and saw Jorgenson's confidence falter.
"And I'm not here alone, Director Jorgenson."
"No threats, Director," came a voice from behind one of the pillars of the parking garage. "Just promises. I am a very good shot and I have my orders."
Without a word, Jorgenson turned and got into his car. Tim made his way out of the garage, being sure to keep at least one aisle of cars between him and Jorgenson. Then, he walked back to his car.
"Don't do that again, Agent McGee."
Tim looked to the side and saw his CIA guard looking a little put out.
"After all these years of boring you guys with nothing to do, I thought you'd relish a little excitement."
"Not me. I'm all for boredom. Don't do that again," he repeated.
"I won't. Hopefully, that's the last time I see that piece of..." Tim swallowed the words he had considered saying. He could only imagine his mother's horrified expression if she knew he'd even thought them.
"I don't blame you for hating him, but let's stay away from the Hoover building, okay?"
"Sure. I'm okay with that."
"Anywhere else you're headed today? You've been driving quite a bit. I'm glad I get paid mileage."
"Just one more stop," Tim said. "And it's an easy one. I promise."
"Good."
Tim chuckled and got into his car. He waited long enough for his guard to get to his own car and then he started driving. With his warning to Jorgenson delivered, he felt like he could make that one last stop.
He drove to a little strip mall in Maryland, parked and walked into a store before he could talk himself out of it.
"Hello, sir, and welcome to Johnson Jewelers. How may I help you?"
Tim looked at the friendly man behind the counter and took a breath.
"I'm looking for an engagement ring."
"Congratulations! We can certainly help you with that. What price range are you looking at?"
"I'm not planning on going bankrupt to buy this," Tim said. "I want something that will be practical to wear but still beautiful."
"Understood." The man gestured to a particular part of the counter. "These should be something like what you're wanting. If you want to customize the ring, of course, that will require extra time."
"I understand that. I haven't asked her yet," Tim said.
The man grinned.
"Well, what kind of style are you looking for?"
"I don't know if you have anything like this or if you'll know what I mean, but I met her while I was in Morocco, and I'd like something kind of Moroccan style to remind her of home."
"Actually, we do have some rings that are evocative of that part of the world. I can't guarantee that they're genuine."
"That's all right," Tim said. "I'd like to see them, please."
"Of course, sir."
Tim spent the next hour looking at rings, learning more about gemstone cuts, metal types and band thickness than he'd ever known in his entire life. The employee behind the counter, Evan, was extremely patient. Tim figured it couldn't all be because he really wanted to make the commission.
Nothing seemed quite right, though. The rings were beautiful and most of them hadn't made him want to scream and run because of the price. It was just that he felt that Zahara needed something a little out of the ordinary.
Then, he looked to the side, away from the engagement rings and he saw it. He knew it as soon as he laid eyes on it that this was the ring.
"Can I look at that one?"
"It's not an engagement ring, sir," Evan said.
Tim smiled. "It will be if I give it to her that way."
Evan nodded and got the ring out of the case. It was so different. The band was thicker and it had intricate designs carved in it, and then, the main stone was actually blue, not the typical diamond, although it was accented with some small diamonds. The blue instantly made him think of Marrakech.
"Yes, this is it," he said. "It's perfect."
"I can tell," Evan said. "I don't know if I've ever seen someone's face light up like that. It's not what I would have expected, but I'm happy to sell it to you. Now, the tricky part. Do you know what her ring size is?"
Tim reddened a little because he had been thinking about this for a while, even if he hadn't planned on doing anything about it so soon.
"Yes, I do."
"Nothing to be embarrassed about. That's a good thing. It means that, assuming that we'll have to adjust the size, we can do it that much faster."
Tim didn't bother to explain why he felt self-conscious about knowing Zahara's ring size, but he gave the size, and the ring was two sizes too large.
"No problem, sir. We can get that resized for you in just a couple of days. We will have to take extra care because of the design on the band, but if you can wait that long..."
"Yes, I can," Tim said.
"Wonderful. Then, I'll just take down your information and we'll get this process started."
Almost before he knew it, Tim handed over his credit card and then left the jeweler with the promise that he would be able to pick up his ring in two days.
Two days.
That would be enough time to plan something. He didn't want to go overboard with it because he felt that people who had to dress things like this up too much were destroying the beauty of the experience. However, he did want to do something.
Then, he drove back to his apartment and tried to calm himself down enough that he'd be able to go and see what Zahara had bought without giving away his plan. He did call Daniel back and let him know that everything was fine.
...but he didn't say anything about the ring he'd just bought.
