BOOOOOM!

There was a huge explosion caused by a Focus Blast from Keldeo.

THE SHOW MUST GO ON!

Go on. . . go on. . .go on. . .

Keldeo activated his Secret Sword and swung it, causing a flash of light.

THE SHOW MUST GO ON!

Go on. . . go on. . .go on. . .

Kyurem the Critic gave a genuine smile as he watched a slide show of highlights from his reviews.

Spike the Snob tipped his black top hat.

I'LL FACE IT WITH A GRIN!

"NO SHIP, SHERLOCK!" Intoxiquer the Crobat shouted in Genesect's face.

I'M NEVER GIVING IN!
ON WITH THE SHOW!

Meloetta sat down with Madoka the Fennekin and Damian the Meloetta on either side of her.

Imperator Justinian shook Keldeo's forehoof.

THE SHOW MUST GO ON!

Go on. . . go on. . .go on. . .

Arceus the Critic glared at Mew as she floated near a stone replica of him.

"SHUT UP!" shouted Anthony the Zoroark and Ian the Lucario.

THE SHOW MUST GO ON!

Go on. . . go on. . .go on. . .

Ryu Taylor the ferret and bent water into a small stream and spun it around to slap each of the Mane Six in the face.

I'LL TOP THE BILL, I'LL OVERKILL!

Jack Storm sprung awake and jumped onto his feet, wearing his robes and ready for battle.

Matthais Unidostres and BrickBrony1894 bro-hoofed.

I HAVE TO FIND THE WILL TO CARRY ON!
On. . . with the show. . .

On. . . with the show. . .

"FORESHADOWING!" Munna exclaimed.

"V-WHEEEEEEEL!" Victini exclaimed.

"MUSIC!" Floyd the Pichu shouted while holding his guitar high.

"RAAAAR!" Zoroark roared comically as his held his arms up and shook them.

SHOW!

Keldeo stood up on his hindlegs in his Resolute Form, his Secret Sword shining brightly.

The show must go on!

Go on. . . go on. . . go on. . . go on. . .go on. . .go on. . .

Keldeo the Critic- Season Five

Episode 19: The Talking Eevee by Pinkie pie sweets

Thumbnail: TinyURL: y7vjd6f6

"It's me! Keldeo the Critic! I review it so you don't have to!" Keldeo said with a smile, "Do any of you recall a movie back in February of 2013 called A Talking Cat!??"

Loud booing and groaning could be heard from an unseen audience.

Keldeo let out a nervous laugh and said, "Heh. Okay. Well, how about a movie back in September of 2013 called A Talking Pony!??"

The booing and groaning suddenly became furious and enraged shouting, much to Keldeo's shock.

Keldeo gulped and said nervously, "Oh. . .wow. . . I guess David DeCoteau is on the same level as M. Night Shyamalan and Michael Bay, if not lower. Oh boy, well, I was trying to segue into this review. I was gonna say something like: 'Well, how about a fanfic back in the summer of 2018 called The Talking Eevee?'."

Immediately, there was the sound of tremendous cheering that was way stronger than the previous angry shouting.

Keldeo stood in shock once again, then he remarked, "Huh. . .I knew Eevee was popular, but. . . wow. . ."


The Talking Eevee

By: Pinkie pie sweets

In Lilycove City, there's a Pokémon contest, and two coordinators, Serena and Dawn are participating in it. But plans changed when they meet a human speaking, shiny color Eevee that is endangered of being captured by a poacher. Plus, this Eevee has a dream to be in a Pokémon Contest. Can the two coordinators protect the Eevee and help makes it's dream come true?

Rated: Fiction K+ - English - Adventure/Friendship - Dawn/Hikari, Eevee/Eievui, Serena - Chapters: 8 - Words: 14,799 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 4 - Updated: Jul 23, 2018 - Published: Jun 28, 2018 - Status: Complete - id: 12983713


Keldeo nodded his head and said, "I don't really have much to say right up front. It has a talking Eevee in it. It takes place after Serena parts ways with Ash. Serena meets Dawn. It sounds promising, so let's get right into it! This is The Talking Eevee."

The story begins in Lilycove City, where Serena and her Pokemon are practicing for the Pokemon Contest. We get some nice moves between them all and some nice teamwork, when all of a sudden, something catches their attention."


Serena looks at the bushes, and questions, "What was that?"

The bushes begin to rustle even more. Her three Pokemon are ready to attack to protect their trainer. As the bushes move, whatever it is is getting closer and closer. As the three Pokemon are about to attack, something has come out of the bushes, and it's anything but dangerous.

"Its… its an… Eevee!" Serena says in surprise.

Indeed, it is an Evee. However, this Eevee is different, the coat and eye color is different. This Eevee's coat is silver with white collar fur and tip on the tail, and the eye color is blue.

"It is an Eevee, but the coat and eye color are different," Serena says to herself.

Taking a closer look at the small Pokemon, Serena notices cuts, bruises, and dirt marks all over the silver coat, and is limping on the front right leg.

Serena gasps, "I… I think it's hurt.

Serena runs towards the Eevee to see what kind of condition it is in. Eevee becomes nervous to see Serena, that it tries to best to run, but the injured leg makes it impossible to do so. It falls on it's side while trying to run.

Serena gets down on her knees, and says, "Please don't run away. You're injured very bad, and you need help. Please, let me take you to see Nurse Joy."

Braixen and the other Pokemon communicate with Eevee trying to reason with it. The silver Eevee is hesitating about it, then looks at Serenna. Seeing the gentle smile, the carrying eyes, the Eevee can tell Serena really cares, and wants to help.

Suddenly, Serena hears the Eevee says, "H-he-help… help… me."

Serena becomes stunned, and believes she is hearing things.

But the Eevee says, "Please… Do-don't… don't let him… f-f-ind… me."


"Well, their goes any chance you had of not attracting attention!" Keldeo said in mild annoyance, "Why'd you reveal that you can talk for? For all you know, the moment you're healed up at the Pokemon Center, Serena will be waiting with an Ultra Ball with your name on it! Sure, we know that Serena isn't like that and would only want to help Eevee and get Eevee to safety, but Serena's a complete stranger to Eevee! Why reveal your secret to someone you just met? Imagine if other people acted like this."

A man ran over to Peter Parker and said, "Excuse me, young man! You dropped your pencil!"

Peter smiled and said, "Oh, wow, thanks sir. By the way, I'm Spiderman."

"Think, Eevee! Think!" Keldeo said as he put his right forehoof to the side of his head.

Keldeo put his hoof back down and sighed. "Well, Serena rushes Eevee to the Pokemon Center, and Eevee is taken in to get healed." Keldeo then cracked a smile and said, "And, you know, maybe I was out of line about what I said earlier. I mean, it's not like Serena is gonna tell the first random stranger she meets that she found a talking Shiny Eevee, I mean, that would just be ridiculous-."


Dawn asks the new comer, "What happened to that poor Eevee?!"

"I don't know. It came out of the bushes and looked injured and tired. It was covered in scratching and bruises. And I think it's paw's injured too," Serena explains

Dawn says in concern, "That's awful."

"You want to know what's unbelievable. That Eevee talked. I mean talked like a person," Serena adds.


Sweetie Belle: "OH, COME ON!"

Keldeo smiled and said, "And that's why I think Ash should be with Iris instead."

Loud booing broke out, but Keldeo just stood smiling until they stopped.

"Well, at any rate, the subject of a talking Eevee brings up a mutual foe of the two girls."


"It talked?" Dawn questions.

Serena nods her head, and says, "Yes. I never heard of a talking Eevee. Then again, I had a lot of encounters with a talking Meowth…"

"Wait! Did you saw a talking Meowth?" Dawn asks.

"Um, yes," Serena answers, looking a bit skeptic.

Suspecting the Pokemon Serena is referring to, Dawn asks, "By any chance did that Meowth happen to be a part of an Organization called Team Rocket."

Serena gasps, and says, "That's right. How do you know that?"

"Because I had trouble with them in the Sinnoh Region. They always try to take other people's Pokemon. Especially my friend's Pikachu."

"Pikachu?" Serena quietly questions.

She begins to wonder if she knows a certain someone who has a Pikachu.

Serena asks, "By any chance, does the trainer who has the Pikachu is name Ash Ketchum of Pallet Town?"

"Yeah! Are you saying you traveled with him and Pikachu?!" Dawn asks in surprise.

"I did. In fact, I met Ash when I was little, and I traveled with him in the Kalos Region. That's where I'm from," Serena answers.

"No way! I traveled with Ash when he was at the Sinnoh Region," Dawn says.

"Wow! I guess we both have lots of adventures with him," Serena happily replies.

"You can say that again. By the way, my name is Dawn," Dawn says, introducing herself.

"Hi Dawn. My name is Serena," Serena happily replies.


"Meanwhile, our villain is out in the forest with his Pokemon, searching for the talking Shiny Eevee."


The man is tall, around his thirties, and a bit muscular. He has black hair, and a scar on his right cheek going over his eye. He is wearing a black shirt, with light brown cargo pants, brown combat boots. The man looks around for the Pokemon he is looking for.

He then notices small paw prints on the floor.

He says to himself, "So… The target when this way after all."


"He better not be named Scar," Keldeo said in complete seriousness.


Nurse Joy escort Serena and Dawn to see the injured Eevee. The two girls follow the nurse inside the emergency room. They they reach the room where the Eevee, they can see it wrapped in bandages. There's one wrapped on its paw, on its head, it's left ear, on its stomach, and on its tail .Serena and Dawn eyes water to see the condition of the pokemon.


"Their eyes are watering? What does it smell bad in there?" Keldeo remarked.

The booing and jeering returned, and Keldeo groaned and said, "Oh come on! It's not my fault this story has weird writing!"


Dawn asks, "Nurse Joy, do you know if there are any Pokemon causing trouble or Pokemon Poachers around?"

"Now that you mention it, there rumored to be a ruthless Pokemon Poacher who goes by the name of Scar-


"NO!" Keldeo shouted defiantly, "NO! Just. . . NO! How lazy can you get? You know what, forget it! I'm calling him Tim. You know, like the Pokemon Hunter from Mew's Stupid Adventure by tillerian. Yeah, from now on, the villain is Tim. At least that name is ironically clever, because he's this big bad Pokemon hunter who's tough and dangerous, but he has this short and non-threatening name. You can't just give a character a scar and then call him scar, unless you were the first one to ever do it, that's why Scar worked in The Lion King. He's the only one who will ever be able to pull off that name. So, this guy here, his name is now Tim."


"Well, you see… the Eevee actually talked like a person, and… I think this Pokemon Poacher Scar is after it," Serena answers in concern.

"What?!" Nurse Joy exclaims.


"Why don't you just shout it on the rooftops?" Keldeo said sarcastically, "Or even better, why don't you just go on the TV news? Then the entire world will know about it! Seriously, why are you telling everyone that the Eevee can talk? Do you seriously not know how to keep a secret? I know you revealed your crush on Ash when you kissed him, but just because you revealed your secret that doesn't mean everyone else has to reveal theirs!"

"So, Eevee wakes up and tries to escape."


Eevee begins to get up again as it feels the pain on it's body. Once it's up, the little Eevee begins to walk as it limps, and manages to get off the bed and onto the floor. Then the determined Eevee continues to limp as it tries to leave the room.


Keldeo frowned and said in a deadpanned expression, "Oh wow, look at Eevee go. Yeah, there's no way Tim will be able to catch her now."

Portal 2 Announcer: "Sarcasm Self-Test complete."

"Well, Piplup spots Eevee before she can get away, and the humans are able to talk some sense into it, which is a good thing because judging by the way she's been acting and the choices she's been making, she has no common sense at all!"


"Eevee, I know that you're trying to get away from someone, but you can't with the condition you're in," Dawn says.

"Dawn's right, you must say in the medical room until you're better," Nurse Joy.

Eevee sighs, "Okay. and I guess I can't go see the Pokemon Contest like this. Even though I really want to be a part of it."


Keldeo face hoofed, then he put his hoof back down and said, "You know, Tim probably wouldn't be after you if you didn't talk to every human you met! Seriously, just don't talk! Just don't! It's an easy thing not to do! Are you not able to speak in Pokemon language? Why not just fake it when there are humans around! All you gotta do is say your species name over and over again! It's so easy, a Psyduck could do it!"

"WHAT!?"

Keldeo turned to see that a Psyduck was standing off camera holding up a boom microphone. The Psyduck threw down the boom microphone and glared at Keldeo angrily. "NOT. COOL," the Psyduck said as he pointed accusingly at Keldeo, then he turned and stormed off in a huff.

"I did not know you were there!" Keldeo shouted out after him in desperation, "I – I – I-." (1)

Munna flew over from behind the camera and looked down at Keldeo in shame. "That was racist," she said darkly.

Keldeo groaned, and he looked towards the filming lights where Victini and Floyd were. "Can you guys go apologize to Psyduck for me?"

"Sure, no problem," Victini said, and he and Floyd went after Psyduck.

"Why'd you send them?" Munna asked testily.

Keldeo frowned at Munna and said, "Because I need you to keep the camera rolling. Besides, you'd probably just make him hate me ever more. And why didn't you tell me you hired someone?"

"I did!" Munna shouted in exasperation, "But you were so busy playing Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, Super Mario Odyssey, and Fortnite with Matthais while Zoroark filled in for you during your vacation that you either weren't paying attention or forgot about it."

Keldeo sighed and said, "Look, I really am sorry for that remark, but Misty's Psyduck really left an impression on all of us, for better or for worse."

"Worse," Munna said.

"Can we please get back to the review? I promise, I'll give that Psyduck a proper apology when we're through, and I'll do what I can to make it up to him. I give you my word as a Sword of Justice."

"Fine," Munna said, and she flew back behind the camera.

Keldeo cleared his throat and said, "So, it turns out Eevee fell in love with Pokemon Contests after seeing Dawn go up against Zoey."


What really caught my attention and inspired me to want to be in a contest is on the final round. There was one girl coordinator name Zoey who has a Glameow and a Gallade and the other coordinator name Dawn with a Piplup and Togekiss. It was the most amazing contest battle I have ever seen. At the end, the Zoey won the contest with little amount of points she has when the time is up."

Dawn gasp with a smile, "Hey, that was the final round contest battle I was in with Zoey!"

"Yeah. I traveled along Hoenn to see all kind of battles, but whenever there's a contest in the town I'm in, I go to watch it from the t.v or get in the stadium to watch the pormance. I was actually going to watch the Lilycove contest…" Eevee explains with glee.

But becomes sad and nervous as it says, "That is, until that horrible man and his Pokemon attacked me. He said people will pay millions for a shiny Eevee with blue color eyes and I can talk. It scares to to hear that he wants to sell me to who knows who."


"Well, maybe if you just didn't go around talking to humans- sorry, I'm sorry, I'm still stuck on that," Keldeo muttered.

"So, while Eevee rests some more, Serena and Dawn have a Pokemon battle between Braixen and Togekiss. Then they share Pokepuffs and Poffins, and come up with an idea to put on a special show for Eevee."


The next day, all the Pokemon Coordinators are on their final day of practice before the Pokemon Contest start in two more days. In the Pokemon Center having breakfast with their Pokemon, Serena and Dawn are also discussing on the pre performance they are planning to do for Eevee.

"Alright, after Braixen uses it fire blast I will use Buneary' ice beam attack," Dawn says.

"Sounds interesting," Serena says.

Dawn nods her head, "I got that inspiration from an ice cream bar that has tomato berry jelly inside."

"That's amazing. You made a contest move from a desert," Serena says, sounding impressed.

"Not as much as you used your Pokemon's attack to create a blooming flower from your Master Class Performance," Dawn replies.

"And I'll bet Eevee will have a fun time seeing what you didn't for the appeals round during your Sinnoh Grand Festival," Serena complements.

The two girls then giggle with smiles on their faces. Just then, Nurse Joy walks over with the talking, shiny, Eevee in her arms.

"Hello girls, I'll be happy to let you know that Eevee is doing a lot better now. It will still need to be off of its pay, but Eevee is going a lot better now," Nurse Joy says with a smile.


Keldeo smiled sheepishly and said, "Yeah, you may or may not have noticed this, but the author seems to have a habit of putting in the wrong letter or letters. Like didn't instead of did or pay instead of paw. This happens a lot in this fanfic, and it annoys me. I know it wouldn't come out as a misspelling, so it's understandable that the author might gloss over it, but still, there are a lot more of those in here than you would normally expect to see."


"Dawn and I decided to show you some of our contest performance," Serena says.

"We're going to give you your own personal show," Dawn adds.

Eevee eyes sparkles with a big smile, "Really?!"


Keldeo smiled and said, "There's no real sense in me including them in the review. But trust me when I say that everything is well written with plenty of details and excellent word choice that makes it all seem real. The author did a really good job in putting the images of a Pokemon performance in your head. Go see it for yourself."

"Anyway, it turns out Zoey was watching as well, and Dawn introduces her to her new friends."


"Hey! I never seen an Eevee in this color before. Does it belong to you?" Zoey asks in surprise.

"No. Eevee is a wild Pokemon," Serena answers.

"That's right. I'm kind of on my own," Eevee replies.

Zoey gaps, and asks, "Did… did it just talk?"


Keldeo frowned and said, "Eevee, haven't you ever heard the old saying, 'discretion is the better part of valor?' Seriously, if someone is trying to kill or kidnap you because of something you did or can do, isn't the most logical course of action to just stop doing that thing!"

"Well, after some more dialogue, Tim finally shows up and tries to get Eevee."


The girls look to see the man with the scar is walking towards them.

"Excuse me, but by any chance you have an Eevee of a different color with you?" The man asks.

The three girls look at the man with serious looks on their faces. There is something about that man that shouldn't be trusted.

Zoey firmly asks, "Why do you want to know?"

"Because that Pokemon rightfully belongs to me, and I would like to get my hands on it," the man asks.


"You look and sound like a supervillain," Keldeo said sternly.

"So, the girls tell Tim to leave and. . . he just. . . leaves?" Keldeo blinked his eyes in confusion, "Who trained him, Swiper the Fox!"

Serena, Dawn, and Zoey: "Poacher, no poaching! Poacher, no poaching! Poacher, no poaching!"

Tim: "Oh, maaaaan!"


I think this man is the Pokemon Poacher Eevee and Nurse Joy told us about," Dawn says.


The Intoxiquer: "NO SHIP, SHERLOCK!"

Keldeo gave his eyes a roll and said, "Now, you would think that the girls would let Officer Jenny know that the Pokemon poacher is in the city, but-."


"So what is it you need to report to me about?" Officer Jenny asks.

"We met this man by the name of Scar. And according to little Eevee, this man has used his Pokemon to hunt it down," Dawn explains.

Serena brings out Eevee from her backpack, "Eevee got hurt because of it."


Keldeo's eyes widened, "Wait, they actually made a correct, logical decision? Oh my gosh!"


"That's him! He's the one who attacked me when I cramming to the city," Eevee confirms in shock.

Officer Jenny becomes surprised and confused, "Huh? A talking Eevee?"

"Um yeah," Eevee shyly replies.


Rigby: "STOP TALKING!"

"What is wrong with this Eevee?!" Keldeo complained, "It's like a person who goes around telling everyone that he has a million dollars in his mattress at home and always keeps the front door unlocked. Does she want to hide or to get attention? She can't have both!"


Officer Jenny sighs in relief. "Good. I'm glad I wasn't hearing things. Either way, maybe I can get your testimony about what Scar was trying to do."

"Okay," Eevee answers, nodding its head.


"I'm starting to wonder if Tim is just wasting his time here," Keldeo remarked, "I mean, no one seems to react to a talking Eevee with anything beyond slight interest. Doesn't seem like anyone would be willing to pay through the nose for her judging by how these people are reacting. And wait a minute, testimony? Officer Jenny, are you seriously gonna go back to the police station and tell your chief or boss or whoever that you got a testimony from a talking Eevee?"

From within the mental hospital, Officer Jenny could be heard crying out, "You gotta believe me, that Eevee did talk to me!" Then there was the sound of a loud electrical shock mingled with the woman's screams.


Nurse Joy smiles, and says, "I will be happy to let Eevee sit with me during the contest. So there's no need for you all to worry."

"Thanks Nurse Joy, this really means a lot to us," Dawn says with a smile.

"And Eevee will get to watch us perform our contest moves from a great seat," Zoey adds.


"Yeah, I know I already insulted Psyduck, and I don't want to insult anyone else. . ." Keldeo said nervously, then he sighed and said, "But is a Nurse Joy really that much of a deterrent for a vicious Pokemon poacher?"

Keldeo then smiled sheepishly and said, "Unless she was the older one from The Island of Illusions! In Black and White: Unova Adventures, becauseshe was awesome."

"So, the next day, the Lilycove Pokemon Contest is about to begin."


Eevee then looks at the stuff the Coordinators are doing. They are getting themselves, and Pokemon ready for the contest.

Eevee looks at the others, and asks, "Serena, can have my fur brush and have accessories on me. I want to look good."

"Sure. What will you like?" Serena answer.

"Ribbons," Eevee eagerly answers.

Then calmly says, "And maybe a few flowers too."

"That sounds cute," Dawn says.

"Well, it's like Ninetales always tell me, sometimes a girl needs to accessorize and make sure your fur is clean," Eevee says.


"Wait, wait, wait, WHAT!? Ninetales? What Ninetales?" Keldeo exclaimed in utter confusion, "Is she your mom? Your sister? Your role model? Who are you talking about?"


Zoey laughs, "I'm guessing you're quiet a little lady are you."

"I maybe a girl Eevee, but I'm tougher than I look," Eevee says, with a smile on her face.

"Then let's do a little accessorizing before the contest starts," Serena says.

"Yeah," The two girls and the little Pokemon cheer.


"Wait! Wait! Go back! What about the Ninetales? Aren't we gonna find out who she was?" Keldeo said, "You can't just bring up a character out of nowhere and then not do anything with it! Couldn't we have gotten a quick flashback or something?" Keldeo frowned and said, "Come to think of it, we're already halfway through this fanfic and we haven't even found out how Eevee can talk! Are we just never gonna find out? That's lazy! We learned how Meowth learned to talk in the Anime, and it gets briefly brought up once a Generation, so why can't we get an explanation for how this Eevee learned to talk. Between this and the large number of easy to fix typos, I can't help but feel like this author was in a rush to get this out for some reason."

Keldeo tapped his right forehoof against the ground with frustration as he continued, "But then, at the same time, the author clearly put a lot of effort into the Pokemon Performances. Zoey, Serena, and Dawn do their Appeals Performances, and they're amazing! Again, I'm not gonna copy and paste them into my review, go read the story yourselves. But it just blows mind how one part of a fanfic can be well written with details and attention, while the other can be done in a clearly rushed manner. It's almost like the author cared more about the performances than the actual plot and characters of the story. . ."

Keldeo eyes widened in horror, and he said, "Oh my gosh. . . that's the same problem A Talking Cat!? And A Talking Pony!? had!"


The screen then shows the eight pictures being shuffled on the screen. Then they picutres turns, and show who the eight Coordinators will be battle. Dawn is battling first with another girl. Zoey is battling with a boy in the third round. And Serena will be battling in the last round with another girl.

"Looks like I'm up first," Dawn replies.

"Don't worry Dawn, I know you'll do great," Serena says.

"Yeah. you can beat her," Eevee says.

Dawn giggles, and says, "Thanks."

They then hear Nurse Joy calls, "Eevee, it's time for us to get back to our seats for the second round."

"Okay," Eevee replies.


Keldeo now looked completely freaked out. "This is crazy," he said, "This is completely crazy! This fanfic is so much like those movies, it's starting to freak me out. The title of the story focuses on the talking creature, but the plot puts all of its focus on something else! Like, the talking creature is an afterthought, and you could either replace it with something else, or even remove it entirely, and the story could still work if you just tweaked a few other things. If you took out the talking Eevee, you'd still have a story about Serena, Dawn, and Zoey becoming friends and rivals. Maybe Tim could try and steal Serena's Pokemon, because they're from Kalos and valuable in Hoenn, seriously, why does this story need a talking Eevee in it!?"

Keldeo sighed, "So, then we get some really cool battles that continue to be very well written, and Serena ends up beating Zoey and Dawn and winning the contest."


"You have given us a very unique performance. And your Pokemon and the audience were having so much fun watching it," Mr. Contesta says, presenting the ribbon to Serena

"Thank you very much," Serena says.

She takes the ribbon and looks at it with a smile on her face.

She the hears Eevee asks, "Serena, can I see it?"

"Sure," Serena answers with a giggle.

Serena kneels down and shows Eevee the ribbon. Eevee has never seen a ribbon that close before. Her eyes sparkles, and wishes she can have a ribbon like that.


"Oh yeah! There was a talking Eevee in this fanfic! I almost forgot!" Keldeo said loudly.


Suddenly, a scream begins to surrounds the area. Many Pokemon begins to enter the area and onto the battlefield. There is a Scizor, a Sneasel, a Tangela, a Fearow, a Houndoom and a Seviper. All of the Pokemon comes out the battlefield and surround Serena, Eevee, her Pokemon, and the judges.

"What is going on here?" Mr. Contesta asks.

"That isn't being very remarkable," Mr. Suziko adds in concern.

Eevee gasps, "Those Pokemon!"

"What's wrong Eevee?" Serena asks in concern.

Eevee jumps into Serena's arms, and answers, "He's here!"


"So Tim finally decides to make his move. . . in a densely populated area packed with Pokemon Trainers. . . ugh. . ." Keldeo said in annoyance, "You know, it would be funny if Tim was like, 'forget that Eevee, I want those Pokemon the Kalos girl has! Is that a Fairy-type!? Oh, ka-ching, ka-ching!'"

Keldeo chuckled a bit, but then frowned and said, "But no. Tim still wants the talking Shiny Eevee that nobody is impressed by, and decides to fight a 3 against 1. Even Eevee joins in on the fight!"


Nurse Joy asks in concern, "Eevee, are you sure you want to do this?"

"Yes. My foot does feel a lot better, but I'm not going to stand there and let this rotten poacher push me, my friends, or any Pokemon around. I'm going to join my friends in battle," Eevee says with determination in her eyes.

Mr. Contesta comments, "You have to admit, that Eevee has a lot of spirit."

"And wanting to stand by her friends is truly remarkable," Mr. Sukizo agrees.

"But Eevee, Scar hurt you the last time he saw you," Dawn worriedly says.

"I know, but I can't run away from him forever. I got to face him sooner or later, "Eevee replies.


"I feel bad," Keldeo remarked, "This would have been a very nice moment of character development if we got to spend more time with Eevee and maybe seen some backstory, or a flashback of Tim injuring her. It's basically Ash's Goodra's backstory done horribly wrong! Imagine if we never saw that flashback of Florges attacking him and sperating him from Wooper. It would suck all of the emotional impact out of his return to the wetlands."

"So, it turns out that Tim's Pokemon are all at level 100, because they pretty much dominate the girls' Pokemon without breaking a sweat. So, now we finally get some backstory for Eevee. A little late in the game for that, don't you think?"


Eevee grits her teeth, and wonders in her thoughts, "What should we do? Scar's Pokemon are going to crush us if we don't do something. But how are we going to defeat them? They're so strong, and the others and I are going tired."

Eevee closes her eyes, and remember something very important. She remember getting some attack lessons from a wise Venusaur far from here in a place called the Forbidden Forest. That is inhabited by grass type Pokemon. Eevee is able to stay there for a short time.


"Okay, that's a nice reference to Grass Hysteria!, but still, it feels so jarring for us to suddenly have a flashback here during the climax instead of having them earlier. It doesn't even explain the Ninetales either because Fire-types aren't even allowed in that forest!" Keldeo explained, "Seriously, I barely know anything about this Eevee other than she can talk, and that's just sad."


She remember Venusaur saying, "You must remember to stand up what your believe in, and never let anyone stand in your way. You must work hard on your attacks if you want them to show how much you shine. You must be wise about using that move, it's a powerful move, and an Eevee never performed that move. You must use it wisely, and guard that power well."


"So Eevee tells Nurse Joy to open the roof, and the other Pokemon to pretty much just throw all of their attacks together, and she also tosses in a Solar Beam for good measure. Yeah, it's one of those fanfics where a Pokemon uses a move it's not supposed to."

Keldeo shrugged and said, "Well, if an Eevee can talk for literally no reason, I suppose anything is possible."


Eevee unleashes a beam of solar light, that hits the combine attack and travel across the area. The power of the girls' Pokemon and Eevee's attack are enough to cut through the other attack, and… boom… The attack has strike at the Pokemon.

Soon, rainbow sparkles, pink flower petals, and small blue obs are floating down the stadium. Everyone are astonished to see the multi combined moves being performed.

Scar becomes stunned to see all of his Pokemon are knocked out. He grits his teeth in anger, and put all of his Pokemon back in their pokeballs.


"So, Officer Jenny shows up and arrests him, and the day is finally saved. Although I still have trouble figuring out how he was gonna get out of there if he had won. I'm pretty sure literally everyone in the stadium would've pounced on this guy!"


Mr. Contesta comes over, and says, "So Eevee, the girls told me that you have a passion for Pokemon Contests."

"That's right, Mr. Contesta. I watch the contest all the time, and I know who you are. You're the head of the Pokemon Contest Committee. And the one next to you is Mr. Sukizo, the president of the Pokemon Fan Club," Eevee answers.

"That's right. You're quite knowledgeable," Mr. Contest says.

"Thank you," Eevee replies.

Then Eevee asks, "So girls, are you going to be heading off after this?"

"We are. We'll be heading to the next contest," Serena answers.

Then Zoey asks, "But what about you Eevee? What will you do?"

"I'm going to travel some more and do some training. Then go to where the next contest will be at next," Eevee answers.

Dawn saddens, and says, "So you'll be traveling by yourself."

"Seems like it," Eevee says.


"If you knew how to stop talking, I'd be okay with this. But since you clearly can't. . . well. . . you kinda have a permeant target on your back. . . or voice," Keldeo said slowly.


Serena, Dawn, Zoey, and Eevee are starting to feel down. Eevee will be all alone, training, traveling, and watching the contest alone. Plus, the girls have become attached to this Eevee. They will feel sad about parting ways from each other.

Suddenly, Zoey smiles, turns to Serena and says, "Serena, I think you should be the one to raise Eevee?"

"Huh?" Serena reples.

Eevee twitches her eyes and look at Dawn with a confused look.

"What do you mean?" Serena asks.

"I mean Eevee should travel with you. That way, Eevee can be in Pokemon Contest, and will have a good Coordinator to help it out. Plus, in a way, I'd say we all got attached to Eevee, and it will be sad to let Eevee be alone, " Zoey explains.

Dawn like the idea, and says, "Yeah. Beside, you're the one who first came to Eevee when it was in trouble. Plus, you're also the one who helped take care of it."

"Well, uh, I don't know," Serena says, sounding unsure.

She turns to Eevee, and asks, "What would you want?"

"Well, I do love being with you three. You all have been so nice to me. You all take care of me, feed me, and showed me your contest moves. I really want to be with you even more. And I can learn more about being in contests this way. Mostly, I get to hang out with Serena and see you two sometime," Eevee says, giving the question a lot of thought.

Eevee smiles, and says, "I think I would like to be your Pokemon. If that's alright?"

"I will be glad," Serena happily replies.

Serena takes out her pokeball and presents it to Eevee. Eevee taps her paw on it, and the pokeball opens up. Then Eevee goes into the pokeball. Once Eevee inside, the pokeball shakes a little as the button flashes red. Then the pokeball clicks, meaning capture is complete.

"Alright, I caught Eevee!" Serena happily cheers.

Serena then releases Braixen, Sylveon, Pancham, and Eevee out at the same time.

Serena smiles, and says, "Hey guys, Eevee is going to stay with us."

"I hope I will be a great member to your team," Eevee replies.

Braixen, Pancham, and Sylveon gather around Eevee and give it a hug. The others are glad to see that Eevee is happy, and is going to be traveling with Serena to perform in more Pokemon Contests.


"And that was The Talking Eevee, which feels like someone ordered a grilled cheese sandwich and told the cook to hold the cheese," Keldeo said, sounding very unimpressed, "I mean, it's not like this fanfic was bad or anything. It just didn't really grab me. Eevee should have shared the spotlight with Serena and the other girls, but instead she just becomes a plot device that occasionally makes a remark. We never learn how she can talk, why she can talk, where she came from, what happened to her family, NOTHING! Her knowing the Venusaur from that Forbidden Forest was something, but it came to late in the story and didn't really tell us anything about Eevee's character. And vaguely mentioning some random Ninetales doesn't help either. We never get know Eevee as a character, so it's hard to get invested in the story. We could have at least gotten a unique name for her instead of 'Talking Shiny Eevee.' Liking contests and being groomed is not enough to create a defined character. Eevee simply isn't fleshed out at all, and all the focus is put on the performances. And the funny part is that it might have been better if we simply didn't even have a talking Eevee at all! This fanfic could have been a nice story chronicling Serena's adventures and new friends in Hoenn. But instead, it's just one big pile of wasted opportunities."

Keldeo nodded and said, "Well, I'm Keldeo the Critic. I review it so you don't-."

"Ahem!" Munna said as she floated over to Keldeo.

"What is it?" Keldeo asked.

Munna motioned behind him, and Keldeo turned to see Floyd and Victini leading Psyduck over to them.

"Oh. . ." Keldeo said gravely, then he sighed, looked Psyduck right in the eye, and said, "I'm sorry for that hurtful comment I made about you. Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?"

"You can review a certain fanfic for me," Psyduck said without hesitation.

"Sure. Which one," Keldeo said with a smile.

Psyduck motioned for Keldeo to bend down slightly. Keldeo complied, and Psyduck whispered something into his ear.

Keldeo's pupils shrank as he heard glass breaking all around him. Everything went pitch black. He was floating in a dark void. Then, he let out a scream as fell down into the depths of the world of darkness.

Back in reality, Keldeo stood frozen solid like a statue.

Concerned, Victini poked Keldeo in the side and said, "Uh, Keldeo? Keldeo?"

Then, Keldeo promptly collapsed limply on the ground.

"KELDEOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Victini cried out as Munna and Floyd stared idly by.

Meanwhile, Psyduck laughed quietly to himself as he slowly walked off.


The End


Credits

Footnoted References

(1) Geico: So Easy a Caveman Can Do It

Other References

A Talking Cat!? (2013)

A Talking Pony!? ( aka A Pony Tale) (2013)

My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic

Mew's Stupid Adventure by tillerian