After Christmas, the time moved incredibly quickly through Brittany's vacation from work, Annie's vacation from school, and the remainder of the year 2024. We spent those days relaxing in the house, where Marisa would push herself up on her hands and just rock back and forth, before she'd inevitably fall flat on her belly and yelp, and Annie would lay in front of her, trying to show her the proper way to crawl. We worked on decorating Brittany's new office, where, on one particular day, we probably looked like the cutest family there ever was, me and Annie in overalls, Brittany in cargo pants and a sports bra, and Marisa in ripped baby jeans and a shirt with a unicorn doing construction. We had a tiny half-birthday party for Marisa, at Annie's request, where the three of us ate cupcakes, and we fed the baby her first bites of milky rice cereal (which she really wasn't crazy about, and Dr. Kellen said that as long as she was still nursing well, we didn't need to be worried). We opened more Christmas gifts that came late, and we spent New Year's Eve at an extremely uncomfortable party at Kurt and Blaine's. Before Annie went back to school, Britt and I did manage to sit down and have a talk with her about the upcoming surgery, about going to sleep in the hospital for just a little while, and waking up and no longer needing her eye patch, about both Britt and I being there as soon as she was finished. She cried a little bit, unsure how she felt about it, Brittany cried a little bit, feeling powerless to make the situation sound any less scary than it was, and I blinked furiously, trying to keep myself from crying as well. But when all was said and done, Britt and I were confident that she was as prepared as she could be, and by the time the first Friday of January rolled around, we were all up early and ready to get things over with.

"'S it gonna hurt my eyes very bad?" Annie asked, her little brow furrowed as she sat cross-legged on the floor in Marisa's room, watching as I nursed the baby, and Brittany packed her things up to spend the day at Kurt's.

"They might burn a little, Bean." Britt told her, looking to me for moral support. "But they're going to give you special medicine to make it feel better."

"And you're gonna be at the hospital all the time, right? And you're going to be there when I get to wake up?"

"We wouldn't be anywhere else, mi amor."

"Okay." She nodded slowly. "Mamí, I need to give my sister lots of extra hugs before we leave, okay?"

"Do you want to come up here with us?" I lifted my arm up, and Annie scrambled to her feet and climbed into the chair, peeking over at her sister having breakfast.

"You're very lucky you can have breakfast today." Annie told her sister forlornly, and Marisa stopped suckling to turn her head and look over at her. "My belly feels extra, super hungry, but I'm not 'llowed to eat at all."

"Soon, baby girl." Brittany promised, tucking a second change of clothes into the diaper bag and perching on the armrest of the chair. "I heard that there might be some cookie dough ice cream for you when you wake up."

"Even though I didn't have breakfast?" Her little eyes widened, and she broke into a grin. "Wow, that's so lucky!"

"Marisa, do you want to do sit on your sister's lap for a bit?" I kissed the baby's forehead, and she babbled away as Annie held out her arms and hugged her close.

"I'll be home soon, baby Reese." She whispered. "I don't even have t'sleep in the hospital, so we can have snuggles in Mama and Mamí's big bed when I get back. And don't be very scared at Uncle Kurtsy's, he's super nice, even though he doesn't have any babies, and he'll let you try on fancy dress up clothes and everything. I wish I could go with you."


Annie snuggled close to the baby for a long time, until we absolutely had to leave to drop the her off and make it to the hospital on time. It was the first time we'd ever left Marisa alone without Annie by her side, and my chest ached a little as I handed her to Kurt, and saw her wide eyes as I kissed her tiny nose. The drive afterwards, up to Langone Medical Center, was mostly silent, Brittany biting her lip and holding my hand tightly on the center console to keep herself together, Annie whispering to Milky Way in the back seat, and me just concentrating on the road, still icy from the overnight snow, attempting to get us there safely.

With all of the pre-op testing done, the young receptionist led us back to a room where we could help Annie change into her gown, and I watched as her eyes changed from a look of of reluctance, to one of silent terror, once the magnitude of what was about to happen hit her. Slowly, tenderly, Brittany eased Annie out of her clothes and into the ice cream cone patterned gown and purple slipper socks, and when she was finished, held her in her lap on a chair, rocking her back and forth, kissing her, whispering soft words of encouragement as I slipped my arms through my own gown.

It hadn't been a long discussion, when Dr. Marguiles had told us that only one parent could remain with Annie until the anesthesia took over. Britt had quietly confessed to me that she didn't think she could do it, didn't think she could physically stand to see Annie lying helpless on an operating table, and I immediately agreed to be the one who brought her in there. I was glad, watching my wife, that I knew her sister was sitting in the waiting room (as much as we loved our parents, we'd asked them not to come, knowing the frenetic energy would just be too much for all of us), and when the nurse knocked on the door and entered, I softly kissed her lips before she passed our daughter into my arms.

"I love you, my sweet, sweet baby girl." Brittany managed to tell her without letting the tears fall. "You're so, so brave, and I'll see you in just a little while."

"I don't want you to go, Mama." Annie all but begged, clinging to my neck. "Please. I don't want to be here anymore."

"I know, sweetheart. I know you don't, but Mamí's got you, and you've got Milky Way, and I'll be back before you even wake up."

"But I love you too! Why aren't you 'llowed to stay too?" She cried.

"It's okay. It's okay." I murmured in Brittany's ear as she wrapped her arms around both of us, giving Annalise one last hug. "She'll be alright."

"I love you, Annalise. I love you so much." Brittany kissed her forehead and quickly turned away, hiding the tears I knew were running down her face.

Annie cried like I'd never seen her cry before when the nurse led Brittany out of the room, and I couldn't help but feel that same sickening twist in my stomach that I hadn't felt since the early days of my daughter's life. That feeling of being torn in two, like I needed to be with Brittany, because I knew she was breaking inside, and I needed to be with Annie simultaneously. I'd read that it was perfectly normal for a child to panic just before surgery, so I knew it wasn't the end of the world, but as she gripped on to my shirt for dear life, and wailed to the high heavens, I couldn't even help the few tears that escaped from my eyes. When we were led into the next room, I sat down in a chair, wrapping Annie up in the warm blanket the nurse gave me as sobs wracked her tiny body, and I rocked her like I did when she was an infant.

"Please, Mamí, please! No! Please! No!" She screamed.

"Annalise, honeypie." The nurse approached, making Annie cling even tighter, and cry even harder. "I'm going to give you some special juice to drink now."

"No. No! I don't want juice! I want Mama too! I want to go home! Mamí, please, please don't make me. Por favor. No quiero. ¡No me gusta! Tengo miedo."

"Mi bebé preciosa, te amo mucho mucho. I'm right here with you, corazoncita, and I promise I'll never let anything bad happen to you. I would never, ever make you do something that would hurt you." I reached out my hand for the juice, and the nurse gave it to me, smiling empathetically. "Come on, my brave little girl, this will make your belly less hungry, and it will make you feel less scared."

"I don't-I don't like it here." She hiccuped, and I ran my hands through her hair before slowly bringing the cup to her lips.

"I know, hospitals are a little scary, but you'll be asleep soon, mija, and then it's all over."

With Milky Way held tightly to her chest, Annie slowly drank the juice, slowly let the drowsiness that it caused take over her body, and I just continued to rock her back and forth, letting my motions calm her down. When I stood up again, ready to take her into the operating room, I felt her body go stiff, even with the calming medicine, and she started whimpering against me as I walked slowly in.

"I'll sing to you, Annie, I'll sing to you until you fall asleep."

She cried as I put her down on the table, cried as she put the plastic mask over her face, and I don't think there is any mother in the world who can say they haven't cried watching their child be prepped for surgery. My hands never left hers, and I leaned over, kissing her eyelids softly as the anesthesiologist turned on the gas, and I began to sing.

There's a little girl in this little town

With a little too much heart to go around

Live forever, never say never

You could do better, that's what she says

Mama named her lucky on a starlit night

A rabbit foot in her pocket, she dances in spite

Of the fact that she's different

And yet she's the same

"Good night, my girl. I love you." I whispered to her sleeping form, stepping back from the table with Milky Way clutched to my chest and tears falling.

I lingered in the room just a moment, looking at my daughter, thinking how helpless she looked, a tube coming out of her throat, and her little fists still clenched at her sides, and couldn't help but think of the very first time I'd laid eyes on her, the way I'd wanted to pick her up and hold her to my chest, keep her safe from everything that could hurt her. I was glad Brittany wasn't there, glad she didn't have to see it, because I knew it would cause her a different type of pain than it caused me, a pain that would shake her entire being. When I was finally led back out, I knew I needed a minute to compose myself, and as I shed the gown I wore over my jeans and t-shirt, I splashed water on my face to no avail. Quickly, I walked into the waiting room, wanting to get to my wife, and I found her there, pacing the floor as Liz and Rachel watched helplessly.

"Hi." I murmured against her mouth, needing to kiss her, needing to feel her close to me, and she wrapped her arms around my waist, drawing me further in to her.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah." I nodded, trying to punctuate that point. "She's asleep."

"Thank you for going in with her. It broke my heart enough when she didn't want me to go, I wouldn't have been strong enough in there."

"You would have, baby, but I'm glad you could be strong out here instead. It…it was hard to see her like that, helpless."

"Like when she was a baby." Brittany said softly, choking back tears.

"Yeah." I sighed, kissing her lips again. "But she's okay. She's going to wake up, and she's going to be able to see straight, and it's okay."

"I know. I really do know it is, and I know that this surgery isn't even a major deal, it's just, I'll be happy when it's over."

"I know. So will I. Do you want anything?"

"No, I just want to hold you while we wait."

"Good." I took a deep breath and wiped the tears from Brittany's face. "That's what I want too."


The hour and fifteen minutes that Annie was in surgery seemed like a lifetime, as Brittany and I isolated ourselves in the waiting room, graciously accepting the tea that Rachel had brought us, and trying to laugh at the jokes Liz tried to make to distract us, but mostly just needing each other, in silent solidarity, Milky Way in Brittany's arms. When Dr. Marguiles came out to tell us that Annie was done, both of us jumped immediately out of our seats, and Brittany gripped my hand tight as we followed her back to where our daughter was curled up on her side, sleeping soundly in recovery.

"It all went well." The doctor told us, smiling down at the sleeping blonde. "We've got her on a little bit of morphine right now, so she'll be a little disoriented when she wakes up, but she shouldn't be in any pain."

"And later?" I asked, as Brittany sat down beside Annie on the bed and rested her hand on the small of her back.

"When we discharge her, we'll get you the prescriptions she needs, just some ibuprofen really, and then some antibiotics and eye drops, and then next week, I'll see her in my office for a follow-up."

"Okay. Thank you, Dr. Marguiles."

"Of course. I'll leave you with her, and the nurse should be in here shortly. But I'll be back in a bit to check on her eyes."

"You did great, sweetheart." Brittany breathed into Annie's ear as I tucked Milky Way into the crook of her neck, where she always kept him. "You did so great, and Mamí and I are so, so proud of you."

It was a pealing giggle from Annie's lips that startled us as she came to, and she nuzzled her face into her stuffed unicorn for just a moment before she opened her eyes. Even though Brittany and I had looked at post-op pictures online, had braced ourselves for what Annie would look like when she came to, I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel a pang of terror when she peeked her eyes open, and the whites were a deep, angry red. Quickly, I sucked in a breath, and cleared the terrified thoughts in my head before Annalise was fully conscious.

"You look funny, Mama." She giggled again, on a morphine high, and reached out for Brittany. Britt, with a full body sigh of relief, lifted Annie into her arms, holding and rocking her in much the same way I'd done while she'd drank her juice. "You're all swiggly and shiny and my belly still feels so, so, so hungry, and my legs feel like spaghetti!"

"Okay, my baby girl." Brittany laughed through her tears, so glad she was awake, so glad she was no longer scared. "When the nurse comes, we'll see what we can do about being hungry."

"Mamí, you smell very good, you smell like your Mamí smell, and I love that smell lots. When I'm big, I'm gonna wear perfume so I smell yummy and super snuggly too."

"Mija, when you're big, I'll help you pick out your own special smell." I promised her, wrapping my arms around both her and Brittany.

"It can be like cupcakes and pizza and grilled cheese. I'm so hungry." She repeated, a little pout forming on her lips. "I want to eat all the food, and I want to snuggle, and I want to give everyone so many hugs and kisses."

"We can work on the second two requests right now." Brittany promised, lying her and Annie down on the bed together, and moving over so I could cuddle too. "How's that, Bean?"

"'S very nice and happy." She sighed dreamily, taking my left hand and playing with the rings there. "I love you so, so, so super much, Mamí and Mama. The most ever in the whole wide world."

"We love you that much too, amor." I softly kissed the top of her head, and smiled to Britt, who seemed to have relaxed exponentially from the weight of our daughter in her arms.

"Hey!" She yelled suddenly, causing me to startle a little, and Brittany stifled a laugh when I almost fell off the bed. "You forgot to tell me, did my eyes get all fixed now?"

"They did. You're all fixed up, and soon we're going to go home."

"We have to get my sister though! Don't forget my sister, Mama! She probably misses me so, so much, and she's s'possed to cuddle with us too."

"Don't worry, bebé. As soon as we're done, we're going to get you home, and then I'm going to get your sister from Uncle Kurt's house, and I think, maybe Aunt Liz and Aunt Rachel have some presents for you out in the waiting room,"

"Do they have any ice cream? I really, really need to get ice cream."

"Oh my God, do you think they gave her too much?" I asked Brittany quietly, my face scrunching up in concern as Annie burrowed herself into Brittany's chest. Even if it was cute, or funny, or whatever, I really didn't like seeing my daughter doped up on drugs, especially considering my past, and if they had given her too much, and something had gone wrong, the wrath of the Lopez-Pierce women would be thunderous.

"No, it effects Lizzie like this too, don't worry. When I took her to the hospital after she broke her ankle on that nightmare Easter at my parents', she was exactly like this. She begged me for an hour to go find her some cheesecake."

"Okay." I rubbed Annie's back, feeling her calm down a little as she listened to Brittany's heart beat, and played the rhythm with her fingers on the back of my hand. "She's just so small."

"Good afternoon, ladies." The sweet nurse from pre-op came up to the bed carrying Annie's chart, and Annie peeked her little red eyes up.

"No, Mamí, I don't want juice again!" Annie looked at me when she recognized the voice, then hid her face again.

"It's alright, Miss Annalise, I'm not going to give you any juice if you don't want it. I can get you some water, or some ginger ale instead."

"But I'm not thirsty." She whined into Brittany's shoulder. "I'm so, so hungry, Mama."

"How about this, honeypie, if you drink a whole cup of something, and you use the potty for me, maybe I can get you some ice cream, and then maybe get you home."

"'S this a trick?" She asked Brittany, and my wife held in her laugh, promising Annie that it wasn't. "I'm 'llowed to have ginger ale? That's soda."

"Just for today, sweetheart, you can have whatever you want."

"'S a very nice lady. I think I like nurses a lot."

After Annie drank the ginger ale that Connie (I'd actually learned a person's name for once in my life) brought and didn't like it very much, Brittany helped her use the bathroom, while I began reading some of the discharge papers. When they came back out, Annie's ice cream had arrived, and even though she'd taken the slow, small bites we'd given to her, the instant she clutched her stomach, I knew that the morphine was turning her stomach like it used to do to me, and I quickly grabbed a bed pan. Britt held Annie's hair off of her face, and I hummed in her ear, trying to calm her as she cried from the intensity with which she vomited, and when she was through, she immediately curled back into Milky Way and fell asleep. Vomit aside, once we woke her again for Dr. Marguiles to check her, discharge was easy, and Annie slept again while Brittany carried her to the car, and I tucked a blanket around her in the back seat.

She never woke up, as we brought her inside and changed her into pajamas before settling her in our bed, tucking her under the covers. I kissed Brittany, cupping her cheek as I walked out the door, taking with me the list of things to pick up from Duane Reade (though Liz and Rachel had both offered, I was a control freak, especially when it came to the care of my sick kids) and hailed a cab, rather than dealing with the car again. Feeling a deep desire to get to Marisa, to see my baby daughter, since it had been such a gut-wrenching day with my older one, I headed over to Kurt's first, texting him that I was on my way. When I knocked on his door twice and got no answer, I felt panic grip my chest hard and fast, especially because he hadn't answered my text. Using the key that he'd given me years ago (and having horrific visions of him bloodied and passed out on the floor, and my daughter crying from the pack and play, or worse), I heard yelling coming from the kitchen, and it wasn't an intruder, it was just an all too familiar tenor.

"Kurt, I didn't do anything. I just-"

"You're right, you didn't do anything, and that's the problem, Blaine. We've been married for less than two years, and you've given up on trying to make this marriage work."

Uncomfortable at hearing them fight, unsure of whether or not to intrude, and hoping that my daughter was asleep in the guest room, and not right in the middle of it, I crept down the hallway and cracked the door open, breathing a sigh of relief as I heard the unmistakeable hum of Baa Baa the Sleep Sheep's (named by a two-year old Annie when he was hers) ocean sounds. Quietly, while I left her to sleep, I packed up her things, wanting to get back to Annie, wanting to get away from the arguing, and kind of feeling sick to my stomach that Kurt was still not in a good place, even though it had been so painfully obvious that things weren't good with them all through the holidays, and at heir relatively awkward New Year's Eve party. Marisa hardly stirred as I lifted her up from where she slept, and secured her tightly to my body, murmuring soft words of affection to her in Spanish.

"I want to be a father, and I want you to be one with me. I don't want to raise a baby on my own, while you go off gallivanting who-knows-where with who-knows-who."

"It's my job to travel, why can't you understand that?"

"It's the contracts you choose. You're repeatedly offered work in New York, and you repeatedly turn it down." Kurt hissed. "What I want to know is why?"

"Because you're smothering me!" Blaine shouted, and Kurt gasped, while I stood in the hallway with Marisa, knowing I needed to go into that kitchen and tell Kurt that I was taking her home.

"I'm smothering you? I'm smothering you, because I'd like to see you once in a while? I'd like to not go to ninety-percent of the functions I have by myself? Because I thought that the man I love would want to have a family with me?" I could hear shuffling in the kitchen, and Blaine didn't answer him. "You know what, if I smother you so much, then you should just go."

"Are you kicking me out? You can't kick me out of our apartment."

"Why not? Isn't that what you want, your freedom? It's not like you're ever here anyway, and I can't sit here and fight with you right now, I've got the baby."

"Right, playing house all by yourself with Santana and Brittany's baby. Which you didn't tell me you were doing, even though I told you I'd be home."

"It's a pretty accurate depiction of what house means around here right now. And what you say, and what actually happens are two different things, so I didn't think I needed to clear helping my friends out with their daughter, while their other daughter is in the hospital. I'm not the villain here. Just go. I can't...it hurts me too much to be near you when you have no regard for my feelings."

"Kurt, baby." Blaine softened a little bit, realizing that Kurt meant business. "Please don't do this. Let's make some of that imported tea you like, let's talk it through."

"Don't. You don't get to baby me, and you don't get to butter me up with tea. I've wanted to talk since October, and you keep avoiding me. Now that I blow up, you suddenly make it a priority? No, it doesn't work like that, I need space, I need you to go."

There were no more words, and as the front door slammed shut, Marisa let out a pealing wail, awoken from her slumber by the loud noise. When Kurt heard her cry, he was quick to move from the kitchen to get to her, but my gentle rocking and whispers had already lulled her back into slumber by the time he ran into me in the hallway. Startled by my presence, he gasped, and my heart ached to see his tear stained face, and I looked at my toes, feeling sheepish that I'd heard it all.

"When did you get here?" He turned bright red, mortified.

"A little while ago." I shrugged. "I knocked, but I guess you didn't hear me. Kurt, I'm really sorry."

"So am I." He slumped against the wall and let out a deep sigh. "I just kicked my husband out of the house, and I don't even know what to do."

"Maybe the space will save your marriage." I offered, trying to be supportive, even though I sort of wanted to follow Blaine out the the street and kick his bow-tied ass.

"I'm not even sure there's anything left to save. Fifteen years I've been with him, and sometimes I still feel like if don't even know him at all. We've hardly been speaking, except in public, for months, and he came in here today all bubbling and excited that he got a new European contract, the exact opposite of what we'd been trying to work out." He lamented, and then broke into sobs. "Sorry. I'm so sorry, Santana, that I was fighting with him with your daughter in the other room. I'm sorry I'm a mess when Annie just got surgery, and you should be the one who gets to be a mess. My heart, it just hurts right now."

"I understand." I took his hand in mine, and squeezed it hard. "You don't have to be sorry."

"You should go. I'm fine, I promise, I'm fine."

"Hummel, you're crying, I'm not going to leave you."

"I'd rather cry alone, into a pint of passion fruit sorbet while watching The Way We Were." He tried to crack a smile, because he knew I was well aware of his and Rachel's old routine, and though I'd made fun of it a thousand times, I'd be lying if I said I'd never joined them. "I'll be okay."

"I'm here, if you need me. You can call me, or come over later, if you want. Annie's pretty zonked from the surgery, and we can get takeout, and you can bring some wine if you want, get Britt to have a glass with you."

"Thanks for the offer, Santana, I really appreciate it. I'm not angry and jealous like I was the last time, but I just, I don't think I can hang out with you, or Rachel even today, I need to figure it out on my own, away from the things I wish I had. You're just lucky, you're really lucky that you found someone who wants what you want, and who you don't, apparently, smother."

"He's an idiot, you know." I pat his arm affectionately. "Anyone would be lucky to start a family with you, you're a good guy, and you're going to be a good dad. But I also know that you love him, so if you think there's even the most remote possibility that you can make it work, without compromising yourself, then you should try."

"Yeah. Thanks. I just don't even know." He shuffled his feet on the expensive carpet, and I could tell that he really wasn't kidding about wanting to be alone, like he needed the space to process his feelings without me staring at him. "Give Annie a hug for me, okay?"

"Of course. And us Lopez-Pierces, we all love you, Uncle Kutsy."

"I love you guys too."

Even after he filled me in on Marisa's morning, even knowing it's what I wanted, I still felt funny about having to leave Kurt, felt awful that he'd just had to do what he did, but I also knew that I needed to get home to Annie and Britt, so with a final hug, I left. While Marisa and I waited for the prescriptions to be ready in the drug store, I walked around, humming softly to the sleeping infant, and picking up a few other things that we needed for the house (and maybe a few treats for Annie, because I was powerless to resist). The house was quiet when we walked back in, and after throwing the bags on the coffee table and laying Marisa down in her crib, I peeked in on a sleeping Annie, and gave her a soft kiss before going to look for my wife.

Brittany was in the office, baby monitor beside her computer, trying to get some work done. I didn't say anything as I came up behind her, rested my chin on her shoulder, and grabbed one of her hands to bring it to my lips. I knew that I was lucky Britt and I were usually on the same page about things, but I also knew that given how much I loved her, how much I knew she loved me, we would both fight for each other, no matter what. As much as I really was never a huge fan of Blaine, I sincerely hoped that he'd fight for Kurt, sincerely hoped that I wouldn't see my friend so devastatingly heartbroken.

"I love you." I whispered into her neck, and I felt the goosebumps that rose on her flesh. "You okay?"

"Yeah. It's all over, she's home, she's fine. I feel so much better than before." I could hear her trying to convince herself, and she tilted her head back and kissed me, catching my bottom lip between hers, and just holding me like that. "You look frazzled, what's wrong."

"I just watched Kurt throw Blaine out of their apartment, and I feel so bad for him, but I also just wanted to get home, kiss you, and tell you that I love you."

"Oh, honey." Britt turned the chair around slowly and pulled me onto her lap, squeezing me tight around the waist, knowing that no matter what facade I ever tried to put on, at the end of the day, things like that really emotionally effected me. "I love you too, and you're stuck with me for life."

"Good. Britt, because there's nowhere else I ever want to be." I rested my head on her shoulder. "It's just weird to think that people our age, people we are friends with could end up divorced, you know?"

"I do. I'm sorry you were there for that too, I know things like that really effect you." She ran her hands through my hair and kissed my temple. "Where's my baby girl?"

"Up sleeping in her crib, not for much longer though. How was Annie?"

"She hasn't woken up."

"Oh, hi Milky Way." Annie's groggy little voice came over the monitor, and I laughed at her impeccable timing. "I'm all done doin' the surgery now, 's why we're sleepin' in Mama and Mamí's bed, 'cuz it's a special 'ccasion. 'S a little bit hard to blink my eyes."

"We should go ice them and try to get some food in her before we give her the antibiotics." I stood up from Britt's lap, and offered her a hand up, stealing another kiss before we made our way to our daughter.

While we held the frozen peas over her eyes, Annie squirmed and cried a little bit, not liking the dull aching sensation that the cold caused, and as soon as it was over, she curled into me, hiding her tears in my t-shirt. She was exhausted, and not just physically. Even with all the sleep she had, her body and mind didn't do well with the emotional over-stimulation that she'd been through, and Britt and I knew that she'd probably be more clingy than normal for a few days. She took a few bites of the alphabet soup we'd brought up for her, but she was really afraid that she'd throw up again, so we couldn't get her to eat much more than that. When Marisa woke up, Brittany went to get her and bring her in the bedroom, and Annie's red eyes lit up the instant she saw her sister's face.

"Hi, baby Reese!" She squealed, scrambling to sit up, but still keeping her grip on me as she did.

"Do you think your big sister needs lots of kisses, little love?" Brittany cooed, tickling under Marisa's chin and sitting cross-legged on the bed as the baby babbled away, not taking her eyes off of Annie.

The baby wasn't scared by the red eyes, Annie was still her Annie, and she smiled, wiggling in Brittany's lap when her sister took her hand and leaned over to kiss her. When Marisa brought her tiny baby hands up to Annie's face, and pat her cheeks, laughing, I thought it may have been the sweetest thing I'd ever seen, the two of them laughing at each other, until right in the middle of her string of babbles, Reese froze in her motions, and said, clear as a bell-

"Nee! Nee! Nee!"

"Did she just-?" I gasped, covering my mouth in an attempt to hold all the emotions in that were threatening to bubble out.

"My sister knows how to talk!" Annie announced, shouting loud enough that I'm pretty sure the neighbors knew. "She said my name!"

"That's right, Marisa, baby." Brittany managed, tears falling freely down her face. "That's Annie."

"How do you know how to say that? What other words do you know?" Annie asked her, wide eyed and giggly, and the baby just laughed and resumed patting her sister's cheeks and giggling. "'S amazing!"

"It's very amazing." I choked out, and leaned to kiss the baby's temple, squeezing both of the girls and Brittany into a hug as I did so. Both of our girls said their first words so young, and though I knew it would probably be a while before Marisa said anything else, I couldn't help but feel that pang in my chest at her growing up. "Marisa, mija, you're so smart, saying your sister's name like that."

"What else can you say, Reese? Can you say Mama and Mamí's names too, so they don't get left out?"

"It's okay, sweetheart." Brittany laughed, pressing a kiss to Annie's forehead. "We don't feel left out at all. We're so, so happy that she said your name. It's very, very special that it was her very first word."

"What did I say first? 'Cuz I didn't have a sister then." Annie beamed at the baby as she spoke.

"You said Mama first, you called us both Mama for a few months." I told her, and she wrinkled her nose.

"'S very silly, you're not Mama, Mamí!"

"Oh, mi amor, you knew that, some sounds are just easier than others for babies to say. But when you did say my name for the first time, it felt like the most special thing in my whole life."

"You were always good like that, Bean, saying things at just the right time we needed to hear them, and it looks like Little Miss Ladybug is following right in your footsteps." Britt lifted Marisa up in the air and blew a raspberry on her clothed belly. "Isn't that right, my smart baby girl?"

"I can't wait 'til you can say lots more stuff, and then we can talk 'bout stuff like Mama and Auntia Liz do, but right now, I'm very, very, very happy that you can say my name, even if it's a little bit silly like a knee." Annie tapped Marisa's tiny knee to accentuate her point, and the baby gurgled happily, then turned to snuggle into Brittany, almost hugging her Mama like she was shy. "'S a very happy day, even if my eyes feel burny, and I'm very tired, even after lots of naps."


Later, much later, after we'd dealt with Annie's eye drops, after we'd talked to our parents on FaceTime so they could see Marisa's new development, and that Annie was doing just fine after the surgery, after the girls had their dinner, and were tucked in with kisses and stories and songs for the night, Britt and I were sprawled out on the couch, eating sushi out of takeout containers. Looking over at my wife, her mouth full of salmon skin roll and a shock of hair falling across her face, she looked absolutely exhausted, like she'd been trying, trying so hard to keep her emotions in check all day (though I'd promised her I'd take care of her if she fell apart), and it had sapped all of her energy. Dropping my chopsticks on the coffee table, I gave her a meaningful look, then leaned over, pushed the hair out of her face and kissed her forehead, holding my lips there as I felt her shudder against me.

"It's okay to cry, baby." I breathed into her skin. "I know you said you were fine, but I can tell you've been holding a lot in."

"I'm just..." She tossed her empty container aside and buried her face in my chest, clinging to my shoulders. "I don't even know why I'm crying. It's just been a really long day, and I felt kind of like you, last night. When I was sitting in the office after dinner, trying to work, I was really reading about perioperative mortality, and kids who don't wake up from anesthesia. I don't even know what was wrong with me, doing that, but I saw it on those papers we signed... It's over now, but it was eating me up, and I didn't want to scare you, so I didn't say anything before. But when you were in there with her, after she begged me not to go, I was thinking that if something happened, it would be the last thing I saw, and...ugh, this is so morbid, why am I thinking about it? It's over. It's over and nothing happened."

"Britt. My Britt, I get it. You know I get it." I soothed, rubbing her back, holding her tight and kissing her hair. "You could have talked to me before, even if it scared me, you didn't have to do it alone."

"I know. I know I could have, but you were going to have to look at her on that table, and you were the one who watched them intubate her when she was like five minutes old. And then I started feeling guilty again, thinking about that, you know? San, do you think I'm ever going to get over these feelings?"

"I think-" I took a minute to catch my breath, and tilted her chin up so she was looking at me. "Honestly, Brittany, I know how I am about things, and I think it stays inside, and it comes out at the worst times. But babe, you know that you did what you had to do today, when Annie was begging for you, right? We couldn't both be in there, and you were so strong, walking out of the room. I don't think I could have done it."

"You held her while they put her under, I think we're about even on impossible things today." She tried to joke, and wiped her tears away before kissing my lips. "Can we just please hope that neither of them need their tonsils, or appendix, or any other useless organs removed?"

"Yeah, I think that's a good thing to hope for." I smiled a her, and shifted so we could lay together and I could be her big spoon. "She's a tough cookie though, she gets it from you. Remember when you fell off the swing freshman year and you tried to convince me that you were fine to play laser tag?"

"My mom was so mad." She grinned in memory, and I pulled her elbow to my lips to kiss the barely-there scar on the inside of her elbow. "When you brought me home and my arm was basically hanging limp at my side like it was no big deal."

"Like I said, tough cookie." I smiled into her skin, and thought it might be better for her to talk about something else. "On a brighter note, our baby said her first word today."

"She did. She said her Annie's name. I think that was the proudest moment of our girl's life."

"I would have bet our entire life savings that it would have been her first word."

"Really?"

"Yeah." I shrugged. "They love each other so much, like more than I ever could have hoped for. Crazy to think that a year ago, Annie was so scared about me being pregnant, and now, it's like everything she didn't know she wanted."

"Funny how babies are like that, isn't it?" She asked, and I hummed my affirmation. "Nee. That's the cutest thing I've ever heard."

"She's pretty cute." I agreed. "What do you think, do you want to stay here, or go upstairs?"

"Here." She wiggled closer to me, resting our joined hands on her chest, and I brushed my lips below her ear, breathing in her Brittany-ness. "We'll go up in a little bit, but we've got a tiny patient sleeping between us tonight, and I'd really just like my wife to hold me for a little while longer."

"That sounds perfect."