Chapter 52

State Hospital #18, Moscow, Russia

-

Relief.

Gratitude.

Love.

A dozen emotions ran through him when he saw her.

"Alex, darling it's me…" Dimitri was about to take one of her hands in his when he saw the restraints. Anna, Sean, Andrei and the doctor were in the room with him, but Dimitri was oblivious to them all.

Until now.

"What is this?" he demanded, turning to the Russian doctor. "Why is my wife chained to the bed?"

The doctor pointed to his bandaged forehead. "She has violent reaction. It is for keeping her safe."

"Get them off right now!"

The doctor was about to protest, but Dimitri gave him a glare that made him think twice.

"This hospital will not be responsible if…"

Dimitri didn't let him finish. "I said, take them off!"

The doctor undid the restraints, taking longer than it warranted. Presumably, the task didn't fall under his normal job description.

He did it clumsily, waking his patient in the process.

"Hey big sis…" Anna moved to her bedside. Her voice choked. "You have no idea how happy I am to see you."

Alex looked at her groggily. "Anna?"

Anna felt Sean's hands on her shoulders. "Sweetheart…I think this might be overwhelming for her, to see us all like this. Hovering over her."

Anna glanced at Andrei and Dimitri, both of whom stood next to her. "What do you mean?"

Sean gave her a gentle push and whispered in her ear. "I think maybe Dimitri and Andrei should have a few minutes alone with her."

Anna didn't agree, but she didn't protest. Instead she let Sean lead her out of the room.

Once in the hallway, she didn't bother hiding her annoyance.

"I spend weeks looking for my sister and now you're telling me I should get out of the room?"

Sean sighed, nudging her away from the door. "Did you have a look at her? She's obviously drugged. Confused. Hurt. God knows what else. I think you need to take things slow."

"I want to be with her, Sean!"

"I know you do, but right now seeing the two people she's closest to might be all she can handle."

Anna frowned, and brushed off his arm. "Nice time to start taking Dimitri's side."

Sean sighed. "This isn't about taking sides, sweetheart."

He watched as she paced the hallway, her heels making a clicking noise, contrasting to the noiseless rubber soles worn by the hospital staff. "I just…I can't believe it, Sean. Sandrine was right…she found my sister. Alex is here…alive. It's incredible."

"The fact that she lied seems insignificant in light of Alex being alive, doesn't it?"

Anna kept pacing, staring at the door of Alex's room. "I want to see her, Sean. I need to know if she's okay."

"Why don't we talk to the doctor and find out what's wrong with her?" Sean suggested.

Anna put her hands on her hips. "Fine." He was placating her, she knew it, but he had a point. Talking to her doctor would at least shed some light on her sister's condition.

Sean spotted the man walking down the hallway, "Excuse me! We need to talk to you!"

"I am busy!" the doctor shot back.

"Please, just a few minutes," Anna pleaded. "That's my sister in there."

"Yes, I can see that," the doctor replied dryly. "What you want to talk about?"

"I want to know what her condition is," Anna told him. "Why was she admitted?"

"And who brought her here?" Sean added.

The doctor frowned, irritated at the interruption. Reluctantly he stuffed one hand into the large pocket of his lab coat and gestured them towards a row of seats with his other hand.

Once seated, the doctor grabbed a freestanding chair and dragged it across the floor, to sit down across from them.

"You are asking more questions than I can answer," he told them, squeezing his stethoscope into his pocket.

"You can tell us what's wrong with her physically, can't you?" Sean asked.

"Problem is fever because of infection."

"From what?"

"Two things," the doctor said labouring with the words and obviously not enjoying the foray into the English language. "Wound in leg," he pointed to his thigh. "And tattoo in arm. Both was not having good treatment."

"Tattoo?" Anna raised her brows. "She has an infection from a tattoo? I don't understand..."

"Not tattoo only," the doctor corrected, fishing for the word. "Burning tattoo," he tried. "Like with animals…cows." He pulled the stethoscope from his pocket and dabbed it onto Anna's forearm, making a hissing sound. "Like that."

"You're saying she was branded?" Sean asked, hoping he misunderstood.

"Branded, yes," the doctor nodded, certain that was the word he had been looking for.

"I don't get it…" Anna shook her head in disbelief. "What…what the hell would he mark her with…?"

"Is there a symbol on her arm?" Sean offered. "Something recognizable?"

"Not symbol," the doctor corrected. "English letters. They say a name. Alexandra."

"Oh god…" a wave of nausea crept up Anna's throat as it suddenly all made sense. Faison burned Alex's name into her flesh. A permanent mark, to tell them apart. A message to both of them; telling them he wouldn't be fooled again.

"Do you know why this name?" the doctor asked.

Anna held a hand over her mouth, unable to answer. Unable to find the words to explain something so senselessly cruel.

"It's her name," Sean told the doctor softly.

"Her name is Linda Smith."

"No. It's Alexandra Marick," Sean corrected him.

"But the man who brings her to hospital…" the doctor began, just as Sean cut him off.

"Where is that man?" Sean demanded. "Was he admitted as well?"

The doctor shook his head.

"Is he here? Have you seen him recently?"

"No," the doctor replied. "But I did not look." He glanced at the overhead clock and pulled the stethoscope back out of his pocket, getting up from his chair. "I must go now."

"Wait…" Anna protested, "There's more I want to ask."

Sean put a hand on her arm, "It's alright," he said to the doctor. "We'll ask you later."

"Yes," the doctor agreed, rushing off. "Later."

"Sean!" Anna shook him off in frustration. "He barely told us anything!"

"He's an ER doctor, for chrissakes. How far do you think we'll get by bullying him?"

Anna stood up, straightening her skirt angrily. "I'm going to see my sister."

"Anna, wait," Sean grabbed her arm again.

"Why?" she demanded, turning around to face him. Tears had pooled at the rim of her eyes.

"Not like this. I don't think you should see her like this."

"He branded her, Sean!" Anna shot back. "Like an animal! He branded her so he could tell her apart from me. If it wasn't for my past with that monster, Alex wouldn't be lying in there right now!"

Sean pulled her aside, away from the busy corridor, where a man wheeling a stretcher almost ran into her. "This is exactly why you're not going to see her like this."

"Don't tell me what to do!" she snapped, wiping away a tear with the back of her hand.

"Listen," he said, moving closer to her. "We only just found Alex. We have no idea what happened to her when she was with Faison, or even how she got here. We barely know the full extent of her physical scars, never mind the emotional ones. The last thing she needs right now is to see her sister full of guilt and anger!"

Her eyes narrowed, and Sean thought he caught of glimpse of understanding in them.

"He branded her, Sean," she repeated in a whisper, her eyes wet as her hand reached up to cover her mouth, stifling the groans that threatened to escape. "I'm going to make that bastard pay, if it's the last thing I do."

"Hey, sweetheart, it's gonna be okay. She's here with us now, and she's safe."

"I want to kill him with my own two hands!"

Sean tightened his lips. "You and me both. But revenge has to take a back seat right now. There are more important things to focus on. Like Alex."

Anna glared at him.

"She needs you, Anna."

Anna didn't wipe away the tears that fell down her face. And she didn't resist when Sean wrapped an arm around her.

"How can it be okay?" she wept. "How could I have let him do what he did? My beautiful, brilliant sister. How could I have let that happen to her?"

Sean didn't have an answer.

Instead, he held her, as she buried her face in his chest and cried.

Moscow Marriott Grand Hotel, Moscow

-

"If we get a hold of Sampson right away he should be able to get me papers within a few hours. I'll contact him if you can start looking for flights and…"

"Robert!" Sandrine looked at him in disbelief. "We just stepped into this room! You cannot be serious about leaving Moscow tonight. You are in no condition to go anywhere…look at you!"

"If we don't leave soon, Sean and Anna are going to have your face plastered at every security checkpoint at every airport in and around Moscow and…"

"No, they are not!" Sandrine said incredulously. "Sean and Anna have no reason to do that. I told them the truth. They know that because they are with Alex now."

Robert started unbuttoning his dirty shirt. "They'll want to know who helped Alex, Not just who, but how and why."

"They know already," Sandrine replied. "They know it was Roger Saunders."

"Exactly. And if you think for one moment they're not going to try everything in their power to get a hold of Saunders, then you don't know Sean Donely and my ex-wife very well."

Sandrine bit her lip, angry at what he was inferring. "They are busy taking care of Alex now."

"Exactly," Robert agreed. "They're busy looking after Alex now."

"Robert," Sandrine threw up her arms in frustration. "You can barely stand, you're so exhausted. Please don't do this. Sleep for a few hours and think about what you are doing. It's not to late to go back to the hospital and tell Anna and Sean everything."

Robert frowned when he glanced toward the only phone in the room. "Are you going to call Sampson or do I have to it?"

Moscow State Hospital #18

-

This time she thought she was dreaming.

Dimitri and Andrei stood by the bed, hovering over her.

She moved a hand to her eyes, rubbing them, hoping it would help clear her vision.

Gone were the restraints that tied them to the bed and now she wasn't sure whether maybe that had been a dream instead. And this was real.

"Andrei? Dimitri?" she whispered, afraid that saying the names aloud would make them disappear.

Instead, they smiled.

Andrei's smile was so broad it lit up his entire face. "Hi, Alex."

Dimitri bent down to kiss her and when he did the familiar scent of his cologne filled her nostrils. "Hi there, beautiful. I've missed you. You have no idea how relieved I am to see you awake."

Her hands reached out to touch his face.

"Dimitri…is it really you?"

He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into an embrace. "It's me, darling. I'm here and you're safe."

Through Dimitri's hug, she caught a glimpse of Andrei standing next to him, crying and wiping his nose.

"Come here," she whispered, using a free arm to pull him into her embrace. "I missed you, sweetheart."

"I missed you too, Alex," he said burying his face at the base of her neck. He was still crying. Embarrassed that he couldn't stop.

Alex felt Dimitri kiss her forehead, gently pulling away from her to give her a chance to wrap both arms around Andrei.

Alex wept, not wanting to let go of neither of them. The sight of Dimitri and the feel of Andrei in her arms.

It was real. She wasn't dreaming.

It wasn't possible to feel this much love in a dream.

Down the hallway

-

Sean handed her a tissue. "Better?"

Anna nodded, blowing her nose. "Yeah."

"I think your sister is going to need you to be strong for her for a while," Sean said

"This is going to kill Dimitri."

"All the more reason she'll need someone who isn't going to fall apart when they see her."

Anna leaned against the wall and sighed. "Yeah…you're right." She pressed a kiss on his cheek. "Thanks."

"Anytime, sweetheart."

"What about Sandrine and her partner?" she asked him. "Where the hell are they, and why would they disappear on us like this? She has to know we can track them down through the WSB."

Sean nodded. "From day one, nothing's been simple or straightforward about that woman." He scratched his bruised face. "Why don't I start asking the hospital some questions about how Alex was admitted and you give Robin a call to let her know we found her aunt?"

Anna nodded, anxious to see Alex. "Alright."

Moscow Marriott Grand Hotel, Moscow

-

Sandrine wanted to join him in the shower but he wouldn't let her.

"Because you don't want me to see how hurt you are…" she thought angrily, tossing a pillow aside on the king sized bed. "You are so impossibly stubborn. Between you and Anna, mon Dieu, it is a miracle you did not kill each other when you were together."

He had locked himself inside the bathroom for almost an hour now and Sandrine could see a thin veil of steam coming through the crack in the door.

It left her with nothing else to do but contact Sampson.

As Robert had predicted, Clive Sampson had enough clout to ensure there were papers waiting at the Congolese embassy for him within the hour. All they had to do was pick them up on the way to the airport.

"I need another favour, Sandi," a voice asked from the corner of the room.

Sandrine turned around to see Robert standing in the doorway of the bathroom, wearing a white hotel bathrobe. He had shaved his beard and it served to emphasize his gaunt cheeks and the weight he'd lost. The lack of facial hair also made his hair seem longer than it did at the hospital earlier.

"What?" she asked tiredly.

"There's a men's clothing store in the hotel lobby," he said. "I need some clothes. It's probably ridiculously overpriced and I have no credit card, so I need you to…"

Sandrine gave him a meagre smile. "So you trust me now, to buy your clothes?"

He returned her smile. "I trust you with my life, Sandi."

"Robert…" she started.

"What is it?"

"What about the other men?" she asked. "The two agents you took with you. Albert and Moise Ngoma. What happened to them?"

Robert paused, avoiding her eyes. "They're dead, Sandi. When we stormed the estate we got caught. Faison killed them the night he locked me up."

Sandrine got up to put her arms around him. "I'm sorry, Robert. I'm so sorry."

"It's another reason I have to get back to Kinshasa," he said, his voice a whisper in her ears. "I have to see their families. It's my responsibility to tell them. I have to make sure that the WSB takes care of them."

"I know," Sandrine replied. "I know you do."

"Were you able to check on papers and flights."

"Sampson said he can have a passport waiting for you at the DRC's embassy within the hour."

"And flights?"

"There's a Saudi Arabian Airlines flight from Sheremetyevo in three hours leaving for Riyadh. We can connect to Kinshasa from there."

"Good."

"Robert…"

He put an index finger on her lips. "Sandi…please. I know what you want to say. But I need to get out of here. Then we'll deal with the rest. With Faison. Anna. Robin…okay?"

Sandrine nodded, swallowing both her pride and her need to protest his ridiculous plan.

He kissed her on the lips. "I love you, Sandi."

State Hospital #18, Moscow

-

She was still holding on to Andrei when the doctor walked in.

The doctor wore a large band-aid across his forehead and his presence made Alex to release Andrei from her embrace. It also jarred her memory.

"Doctor…" she started, sinking back into the pillow. "Your cut. I did that didn't I?" If she did then it wasn't a nightmare after all.

Nor were the restraints he fastened on her afterwards.

Or the news he told her beforehand.

"It is a miracle you did not lose the baby."

"There is no mistake. You are pregnant."

"How are you feeling?" the doctor asked her, avoiding the question. "I see you have big family."

"You didn't answer my question."

"Yes," he said, not hiding his annoyance at her bluntness.

"That's when you put on the restraints, isn't it?" she continued. "I wasn't dreaming."

"No, you are not dreaming," he told her.

Dimitri stepped in, between her and the doctor. "What are you talking about? Alex, you would never hurt anyone."

"Who are you?" the doctor asked.

"I'm her husband, Dimitri Marick," he said with a frown. "And I want to know what happened here." Alex observed him as he turned towards her. "Did he hurt you?"

The doctor eyed her, his glance hinting that he now knew exactly why the news had distressed her so much. "You need talk to husband. I will come back," was all he said slyly, before leaving her room again.

"Darling…" Dimitri started, his handsome face lined with concern. "Tell me what happened."

"When you came here…were my hands in restraints?"

"Yes, but I ordered them taken off…" Dimitri replied, lowering the steel bar on her bedside so he could sit down next to her.

Alex stared at him.

At this man who'd done nothing but fill her life with love. Who had fulfilled her in ways she hadn't thought possible.

'And because I was afraid of losing my mind…I slept with another man. And now I'm carrying his child.'

She felt the tears fall down her face.

'How can I look at you and tell you that?'

She turned away from him, feeling as though the guilt might rip her apart.

"Alex, darling…are you in pain? Please talk to me…Andrei get a nurse or a doctor for her!"

Andrei dashed out of the room.

"Darling…" She felt Dimitri's hands on her cheeks, brushing the hair from her face. "Look at me and tell me what's wrong."

He loved her so much. But Dimitri Marick was also a proud man.

'If I tell you the truth? Will you ever look at me the same way again?'

'What if you can't?'

'Will it kill that love?'

Oh god. It hurt. The thought of losing that.

She could stand to lose everything else. But not that. Not the way he looked at her, with all the love in the world in his eyes.

"Alex…"

"Please go away."

"Alex…" he moved to the other side of the bed. "Come on, dalring. Tell me what's wrong." His eyes were warm, kind and full of concern.

Alex shut hers tight. She couldn't bear looking into them. Not now. Not knowing what she knew.

"Please. I need to be a alone for a bit..."

She felt his lips on her cheeks.

"I'm not leaving you."

"Please."

She repeated it, refusing to open her eyes, until she heard his footsteps leave the room.

"I love you, Alex," was the last thing she heard him say before she fell back into a feverish sleep.

Later

-

"Anna!"

Dimitri Marick spotted her, together with Sean Donely in the hallway.

"How's Alex?" Anna asked.

It was a good question. He wished he had the answer. "I'm worried about her…at first she seemed happy to see us, she couldn't hang on to Andrei tight enough, but then this doctor came into the room and, something changed. She just shut me out."

Anna frowned, "What do you mean?"

"I don't know how to explain it, it was like looking into the eyes of a stranger." Dimitri told them. "She's got a fever, but at the same time she seems lucid. She asked me to leave her alone."

Anna turned around. "Let me go see her…"

"No." Dimitri grabbed her before she had a chance to run off to her sister's room. "She's sleeping now."

"I want to see her," Anna protested.

"You spoke to her doctor didn't you?" Dimitri asked her. "What did he tell you? What's wrong with her…physically?" Neither Sean nor Anna answered the question, and the silence that hung in the air made him nervous. "Well? What did he say?"

"I checked with the nurse who admitted her," Sean offered. "It's…several things."

"Tell me," Dimitri demanded.

"Apparently she has infections from two injuries. Burns on her arm and a flesh wound on her thigh. The fever is a result of that and they're treating her with antibiotics."

"She looks like she's been though hell," Dimitri added. "Do we know what happened to her? How she was hurt? How did she end up with burns on her arm?"

"We…don't know," Anna replied, her eyes locking with Sean's. It was a mutual glance that told Dimitri she did know more than she was letting on, but as usual wasn't going to share. It was an endless battle. Pulling information out of the two ex-spies was like pulling teeth and he was sick and tired of it.

"What about Sandrine's partner?" Dimitri asked, not hiding his irritation. Soon he wouldn't have to go head to head with Anna and Sean any longer. He had his wife back and he would take her home to Vadsel at the first opportunity. Far away from their world of never-ending secrets and lies. "He brought her here, didn't he? I want to talk to him."

"Don't we all," Sean mumbled.

The answer took him aback. "What do you mean?"

"He's gone," Anna explained.

"Gone?" Dimitri asked incredulously. He couldn't have heard her right.

"They were gone by the time we got here."

Dimitri wanted to laugh. The sheer absurdity of it all was almost comical. "Of course you lost them…you lose everyone don't you? First Alex on the bridge…then you capture and lose Faison's assistant, then you lose Dan O'Toole, and lastly you lose Sandrine and her partner. Is there a day you don't screw up something?"

"In order to lose them we would've had to have them," Sean corrected, his own irritation flaring. "Sandrine's a grown woman with the freedom to come and go as she pleases. Sorry we didn't keep her on a leash for you, Count."

"Maybe you should have," Dimitri shot back. Anna and Sean never failed to jump to each other's defence. They reminded him off two siblings, endlessly covering up for one another's misdeeds. It was just one more thing he was tired of. Like Sean's habit of addressing him as 'Count' just to annoy him.

"Where's her doctor?" Dimitri asked. Maybe he would get more out of him than out of these two.

"Why don't you have walk down the hallway and go look for him, Count?" Sean offered.

Dimitri tightened his lips. It was almost over, he reminded himself.

The forced time spent with Sean and Anna was almost over. Thankfully.

"I think I will," he said, turning around with a bitter taste in his mouth.

Paris, France

Anna's Apartment

-

Robin Scorpio kicked off her sandals as soon as she entered her mother's apartment, slipping into a pair of plastic flip-flips, while glancing into the hallway's full-length mirror.

Her shoulder-length hair was tied back into a messy bun, half of which had come undone on the way up the stairs. That, combined with her fabric backpack, made her look every bit the harried medical student that she was.

Half a dozen of her personal items were scattered on a wooden stand near the entrance of the apartment, a reminder that she spent more time here than at her own apartment these days.

One whiff of the smell coming from the kitchen reminded her why.

'Chili,' she thought with a grin. It smelled like Texas chili. An odd, out of place aroma in the tiny Parisian apartment. Yet at the same time the scent was so welcoming it almost made her homesick for the States.

David was an excellent cook and Robin had to admit that the meals he had prepared for her nearly every day since his arrival, had given her good reason to spend time at her mother's apartment.

'Not that Leah isn't reason enough,' she thought with a smirk, thinking back to the pink rubber duck that had come flying out of her backpack this morning, when she pulled out a stack of laboratory papers in front of her professor. She had caught it just before it landed in an open petrie dish.

But more than Leah and the food, she had to grudgingly admit that she enjoyed David's company.

She loved going over medical case histories with him, thrilled at the chance to get inside the mind of one of the most accomplished surgeons in the United States. They were the kinds of discussions that she knew her fellow students would have turned green with envy for.

'Between you and Alex, I have some incredible footsteps to follow.'

But even more than picking his brain, she simply enjoyed his company.

Robin had been prepared, or maybe it was fairer to say that she had every intention of disliking him, after what he had done to her mother. Yet now she looked forward to the nightly discussions they often had after putting Leah to bed.

Even more surprising was the fact that he worried as frantically about her mother, as she did. Because he seemed to love her just as much.

Tonight, she expected David to be in the kitchen, as he often was, wearing her mother's too-small apron.

She was surprised to see him sitting at the dining room table instead, holding the cordless phone in one hand, his expression serious. A small fan sat on one corner of the table, wildly circulating the warm air in the apartment. It was one of three David had bought this past week.

"Hi, David," she said casually. "Is everything okay?"

"Anna called," he answered, as though only now aware that he wasn't alone in the apartment. "They found Alex."

"They did?" Robin's jaw dropped. "Is she…is she okay?"

David's expression was sombre. "She's in a hospital in Moscow. Anna said her injuries aren't critical. But…"

Robin pulled out a chair and sat down across from him, furrowing her brows. "But what…?"

"But Anna says she doesn't know much at this point. That Alex had some minor injuries that became infected. She's conscious and coherent, that's about all they can tell us at this time."

"What about Faison?"

"Anna said they found an Estate, several hours north of Moscow that apparently belongs to him. She thinks it's where he took Alex to, but she believes that he'll no longer be there."

"So they didn't find her there?" Robin questioned.

"Apparently she escaped with the help of Sandrine's partner."

"what about him…is he okay?"

David shrugged, "I don't know. Anna didn't mention him."

"And Mom?" Robin demanded. "How is she?"

David frowned, "I'm worried about her, Robin."

"Why? What did she say?"

Setting down the cordless phone he had held in his hand, he looked at her. "I'm worried that she's going to blame herself for what happened to Alex."

Robin sighed. David was right. Sometimes he knew her mother better than she gave him credit for. "Mom blames herself for a lot where Faison's concerned. There's not much either of us can do about that."

David's frown deepened when he got up and took off her mother's apron, throwing it over the back of the chair he sat on. Although the smell of his chili still permeated the apartment, Robin had lost her appetite. "Not if we're here and she's in Moscow."

"Sean is there with her," Robin tried to reassure him. "If I trust anyone to make sure Mom's okay, it's Sean."

The response didn't appease David.

"Sean is not her husband. I am!"

Robin said nothing, deciding now wasn't the time to point out technicalities. Like the fact that he no longer was. Married to her mother, that is.

"I should be there with her," David went on. "Me. Not Sean."

He started pacing.

"What if Marick blames her for this?"

"I don't think Dimitri's out to hurt Mom. He knows this isn't her fault. Besides, Mom can defend herself pretty well." Robin cocked her head, trying to catch his gaze. "Why are you so worried about her?"

David stopped pacing. "Why?" He threw his hands up in the air. "Because the first day I saw her in Paris she collapsed and then the minute she's back on her feet she starts chasing after Faison." David stopped long enough to roll his eyes. "Am I the only one to realize that she's pushing herself dangerously close to a breakdown?"

Robin cringed, wishing he didn't have this irritating habit of voicing her own worst fears aloud. "Mom's tough, okay? She's been through worse than this."

David rested his hands on his hips and offered her a cynical smile. "Thanks. Knowing that makes me feel so much better."

"When will Alex be well enough to leave Moscow?" Robin asked, changing the subject. "Did Mom say?"

David shook his head. "No. She couldn't tell me much about her condition."

"Why don't you go to Moscow?" Robin suggested. "You could be with Mom and you could make sure Alex got the best medical care available."

"No," David answered. "I couldn't leave you and Leah here alone. Not with Faison still out there. He could come after either of you."

"Sean's already set up someone to watch the apartment, you don't have to worry about us."

"I won't leave you two here alone," he repeated in a tone that suggested the topic wasn't open for discussion.

A sudden idea lifted made Robin smile. "What if…" she started. "What if we weren't here alone?"

State Hospital #18, Moscow, Russia

-

Andrei entered the room quietly. If Alex was asleep, he didn't want to wake her.

She needed rest. That much he could tell without a degree in medicine.

Maybe several days worth would be enough to get rid of the circles under her eyes.

He debated it.

No. It would take more than a few days, he decided.

He was glad that Dimitri would make sure she got lots of rest. Dimitri was too nice sometimes, Andrei thought. But when it came to the things he cared about, his father could be as fierce as anyone he'd ever known.

And Andrei couldn't think of anything Dimitri cared about more than Alex.

Dimitri would also make sure the kitchen staff at Vadsel would feed her lots of hearty stews and meats, to make up for the weight she had lost. Andrei thought she was already too skinny as it was. But now she looked ill. Thin in the way that some of the sick girls at the orphanage had been thin.

He had been too skinny too, when he first arrived at Vadsel, and Dimitri had done the same. Although he had protested at the time, Andrei now smiled at the memory. It was the best food he had ever tasted. Of course, back then he hadn't been ready to give Dimitri the satisfaction of telling him that.

Out of the corner of his eye, he caught Alex looking at him, just before closing her eyes again.

"You are not sleeping, are you?" he whispered, approaching her bedside.

"No."

She was always honest with him and he was relieved to see that hadn't changed.

"Do you want to talk?" he asked her, pulling up a chair next to her bed.

She shook her head just enough to let him know the answer was no.

"That's okay," he said, leaning back in his chair. "We don't have to talk. I will stay here and be quiet. Until you go back to sleep."

She opened her eyes again. "I want to be alone, Andrei."

Andrei frowned. Her eyes were so sad. He wondered what they had seen in the last few weeks. Wondered then, if others could read in his eyes what he had seen during his years at the orphanage, the same way he could speculate what she might have seen from looking at hers.

He loved her eyes because they always gave away more than she was willing to tell. If he wanted to know what she really thought or felt all he had to do was take one glance into them. But now what he saw in them broke his heart. It made him feel angry and powerless.

"Do you remember that night at Vadsel?" he asked her. "When I went to sleep in the stables, and you come to look for me?"

She nodded, almost imperceptibly. "Yeah, I remember."

"I told you I wanted to be alone too. But I was lying." He smiled. "I am glad you stayed with me. It was nice you stayed."

She said nothing and Andrei took it to mean that she didn't mind if he talked.

"Before you found me, I tried to ride Tempus. I had a bruise because he throws me off. You cleaned it up. Then in the morning, before the sun comes out, you took me to ride Tempus. You showed me how." The memory of that day was so clear in his mind, it could have happened only hours ago. He still remembered wrapping his arms around her waist, holding on tight; mesmerized by the power of the horse they rode. His horse now.

"I will never forget that day."

The words made her cry and Andrei wished he could retract them. He didn't want to make her cry. It was the last thing he wanted to do.

"I love you, Andrei. I love you so very much. But I can't…"

"It's okay," he said gently, bending down to kiss her cheek. "You don't have to say anything. Just go to sleep. And me, I will be here with you. Okay?"

"Okay," she relented. Finally.

He pulled the room's lone chair up against the bed, next to her, leaned back in it and waited for her to fall asleep.

He felt a sense of peace knowing that she was back in his life. He didn't need words or touch. Knowing she was here was enough.

Andrei yawned.

He leaned back in the chair and he waited a long time before letting his eyes close.