A/N: It's here! Finally, the next chapter. I'm so sorry for such the long delay. School has started and I can't believe the amount of reading I'm having to do in just one class. But I'm still committed to this story and finishing it so please don't worry that I've abandoned it. I'm just a little behind in updating. I hope you guys hang in there. And please, as always, hit that little review button and let me know what you think. It brings a smile to my face and helps me know that people are still out there reading this.
As usual, don't own Lost or the characters nor do I own the song If You Leave sung by Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark and is part of the soundtrack of the movie Pretty in Pink.
CHAPTER 49 - IF YOU LEAVE
If you leave, don't leave now
Please don't take my heart away
Promise me just one more night
Then we'll go our separate ways
We've always had time on our sides
Now it's fading fast
Every second every moment
We've got to--we've gotta make it last
I touch you once I touch you twice
I won't let go at any price
I need you now like I needed you then
You always said we'd still be friends, someday
If you leave I won't cry
I won't waste one single day
But if you leave don't look back
I'll be running the other way
Seven years went under the bridge
Like time standing still
Heaven knows what happens now
You've got to--you've gotta say you will
I touch you once I touch you twice
I won't let go at any price
I need you now like I needed you then
You always said we'd meet again
"Ahum…Jack Shepard, this is Phillip Weiler." She said softly.
Standing up Jack put Emma on the other chair before walking over and extending his hand to the other shorter man. "Nice to meet you." He greeted with a firm shake and serious tone.
"Same here." Phillip replied as he tried sizing up the man. He seemed to carry himself with an air of confidence, like a man who knew his abilities and knew he was good at them. The kind of man that proved to be successful in life. Phillip didn't like him. "I've heard a lot about you." He told the surgeon.
Jack raised an eyebrow and shot a quick look at Kate who looked confused. "Oh really?"
"Well, you guys were a media hit when you were first rescued." Phillip offered up quickly.
Pressing his lips together Jack nodded. "Don't believe everything you've read." He joked.
"Oh, so, I shouldn't believe what a hero you were." Phillip asked with a hint of sarcasm. He had read the background report his lawyer had gotten for him on Jack – top of his class at high school, graduating from Columbia University with honors only to be accepted into UCLA Medical School and graduating a year faster than anyone else, and now having built a solid reputation as a gifted surgeon, leading in his field. And that wasn't even considering the fact that Jack had come from an affluent family and had a very comfortable inheritance left to him by his father. The praise bestowed on him and his actions after the crash only added to his image. A formidable competitor in Phillip's mind.
Jack, meanwhile, looked over at Sawyer briefly, before returning his attention to Phillip and his comment. "I did what I had to do to survive…to help everyone survive. Everybody did."
"Well, the, it's a good thing they had a top spinal surgeon on the flight." The other man replied, trying to sound sincere.
Jack decided at that moment he did not like this guy. Using the difference in height to his advantage, he leaned slightly over Phillip. "Something you got a problem with, Phillip?" he asked staring at the man.
"Jack…" Kate's voice came from behind.
Phillip got wide eyed and shook his head. "No, nothing, Jack." He said quickly with a smile. "I just think it's lucky that the rest of the survivors had you to lead them."
Claire came forward and nodded. "Actually, we were lucky Jack was there. He helped get us all organized when the rest of us weren't sure what to do."
Wanting to diffuse the situation Kate grabbed Phillip's arm. "Shouldn't we be going?" she asked quickly. "We have reservations, remember?"
Phillip nodded in agreement and pulled his gaze away from the other man. He reached out and grabbed Kate's hand and brought it up to his lips for a quick kiss. "That's right, we need to get going, don't we, sweetheart?" he gave her a smile then turned his attention back to the group. "Nice seeing you two." He glanced over and Sawyer and Claire. "Jack, pleasure meeting you." He added, the sincerity in his voice weak at best.
With one last kiss to Emma by Kate the couple left.
"A winner ain't he?" Sawyer commented a moment later after making sure they were gone. Claire reached over and smacked him in the arm. "What?" Sawyer protested with a small smirk.
"That's not nice." Claire reminded him.
He shrugged his shoulders. "It's the truth, ain't it?"
Glancing over at the kids to make sure they weren't listening, Claire slowly nodded her head causing Jack to give a low chuckle at the revelation. "He's a bit…she paused, searching for the right word.
"Pompous?" Sawyer supplied. "Egotistical? Pretentious?" He looked over at Jack and winked. "Didn't think I knew that word, huh, Doc?"
"He may be all that," Claire said, "But for Kate's sake, I overlook all that."
Jack was surprised. The way Kate had tried to paint the picture earlier this guy was wonderful. He just figured Claire and Sawyer thought the same.
"So, wait, you're telling me you guys aren't sold on this guy either?"
Sawyer quickly nodded. "This guy's a jerk."
"Okay, Aaron, Emma, go inside and wash your hands really good." Claire told the kids. "Dinner's almost ready."
As the children bounced inside the house she turned back to the two men. "You need to be careful. Aaron can be a parrot some days!"
"So, you two don't like Phillip?"
"Not really." Claire admitted. "I tried, really I did, but he's…difficult to take."
"Tried telling Freckles that when she started talking about getting serious. She got all worked up…thought she might throw me out of the house." Sawyer added.
"She wouldn't have done that." Claire said quickly. "But she wasn't up to hearing anything negative. I think she was afraid she'd end up agreeing with us."
Now Jack was floored. "You've got to be kidding! She's marrying the guy."
"I know, but he's very different from Kate. His lifestyle is just so…I don't know, materialistic and flashy, so not Kate." Claire told him as she saw the kids walk back out to the patio. "Okay, dinner time!" She announced, shelving the conversation for the time being.
Settling Emma next to him Jack helped her with a hot dog and some salad before serving himself some food. As they ate his mind kept wandering off and on to Kate and more specifically her relationship with Phillip. He had definitely come across as a very cocky man. The kind who was use to using his supposed wealth and sense of self-importance to try and intimidate others. Jack was quite familiar with men like him. Hell, his own father at times had played that game, so Phillip wasn't anything new or intimidating. Jack was surprised, thought, that Kate was involved with a man like him; a man who seemed to put so much effort into his image and how others perceived him. He seemed flashy and ready to let you know just how much he had and how important he thought himself to be. Kate was none of those things. While he knew she liked nice things she was not a materialistic person. And while Phillip was a good looking man and could be considered charming by some, Jack couldn't see that as reason enough for a serious relationship. Not when the guy was going to be a step father to her (and Jack's) daughter.
As if on cue he was brought out of his thoughts by a small hand tapping his forearm. He looked down to see a concerned Emma looking up at him.
"Daddy not eating?" she stated pointing to his plate of food that he had barely touched.
"You okay Jack?" Claire asked.
Smiling at Emma and then at Claire, he nodded. "I'm fine, just got momentarily distracted." He picked up his fork and took a couple of bites.
They finished the rest of dinner with light hearted conversation after which the children retreated inside to play while the grown ups cleaned up.
"I was going to give Emma her bath." Claire told Jack as they went inside. "But I'm sure that she would prefer that you tuck her in and maybe read her a story."
"Kate won't be back for that?" he asked.
Claire gave him a small smile. "Probably not, but she's always back before Emma's up for breakfast." She cringed the moment the words left her mouth realizing how that sounded, especially after she saw the hurt look that flashed in Jack's eyes briefly. 'Way to go, Claire.' she thought to herself.
Watching the scene play out Sawyer decided to help out his girlfriend. "Hey, Doc, how about you and me watch a little wrestling?"
Jack turned to him with a surprised look, but glad for the interruption. "You serious? You know that's not real, right?"
Sawyer nodded. "Yeah, yeah, I know." he placed a hand on Jack's shoulder and pushed him towards the den. "What is it with you people and your lack of appreciation for well-choreographed entertainment?"
Half an hour later as Jack sat on the couch watching an episode of World Wrestling he found himself relaxed and actually enjoying it…or rather enjoying Sawyer's comments and cracks about the show. He had to admit the more he had gotten to know the guy, the more he actually liked him. When he wasn't trying to be a hard ass Sawyer was actually a decent guy. And he did go to Los Angeles to get Jack to come to Seattle to find out about his daughter. He seemed to have a deep affection for Emma and for that Jack was grateful. It was nice to know he had looked out for her while Jack hadn't been around. He also seemed to annoy Phillip and for that, Jack was even more grateful. For once Sawyer's talent for getting under someone's skin would be a pleasure to watch.
His thoughts were interrupted by the arrival of Emma fresh from her bath, dressed in her pink Disney Princesses pajamas.
"Well, look who's already for bed." Sawyer commented.
"Not sleepy." Emma replied as she climbed up on the couch next to Jack and slipped into his lap.
With a smile Jack wrapped an arm around her and placed a small kiss on the side of her head. "Hummm…you smell like strawberries." He said softly. "Did Aunt Claire wash your hair?"
Nodding Emma snuggled into Jack's embrace enjoying the warmth. A moment later she tapped his arm to get his attention. "Daddy?"
Jack leaned down closer to her. "Yes?"
"Will you tuck me in when I get sleepy?" She asked sweetly.
Jack felt his heart melt. He couldn't remember ever getting a better request in his life. "Of course, I will. You just tell me when, okay?"
"Okay." Emma gave him a big smile then returned her attention to the television.
Aaron joined them a short time later also fresh from his bath and in his pajamas with train engines all over. He laid down on his stomach on the floor in front of the television resting his face on his hands. Aside from cartoons wrestling was his favorite program and Sawyer had been helping him learn the names of all the different wrestlers and what their "special skill" was. He had even brought home a couple of posters one day for Aaron to put up in his room. Something his mother had not found amusing at first, but when Aaron had pleaded with her and gave her his special puppy dog eyes she had given in.
"Hey, Shorty, where's your mama?" Sawyer asked him during a commercial.
With a small shrug he glanced back at the older man briefly. "She's on the phone with Melanie."
"Oh figures." Sawyer mumbled before pushing himself off the chair. "I'm gonna grab me a beer…Doc?"
Jack shook his head. "I'm good, thanks."
"Okay. Come on Shorty, let's get some popcorn while we're at it." He told Aaron.
By the time Claire had finished her phone call with her co-worker friend and madder her way to the den she found two drowsy children and two not so drowsy men watching the second half of the Spiderman movie, along with a half eaten bowl of popcorn between them.
Smiling Claire made her way over to her son who was now sitting on the couch leaning against Jack trying not to fall asleep. "Time for bed, sweetheart."
"Do I gotta?" Aaron asked with a big yawn.
"Yes, you gotta." She looked over at Emma still on Jack's lap looking just as tired. "You too young lady."
Emma, though, had no intention of fighting the fatigue. "Daddy tuck me in, 'member?" she mumbled with a yawn as she slipped off to stand.
Chuckling, the dark haired man stood up and picked Emma up in his arms. "Of course I remember, Angel." He told her softly.
Scooping Aaron up in her arms Claire led Jack down the hall to the kids' respective bedrooms, leaving Jack at the door.
Carrying Emma to her bed he bent down and with one arm securing the little girl to his shoulder he used his free hand to pull back the covers. "Okay, kiddo, in you go." He told her and she made her way under the blanket. Reaching over to the table next to them he grabbed her stuffed rabbit and placed in securely in her arms. "There, you all set?"
"Read me a story Daddy." The little girl replied, the signs of sleep gone from her voice.
Jack looked at her in surprise. "A story? Sweetie, aren't you sleepy?"
She shook her head. "Pwease."
Unable to refuse her Jack looked around. "Where's your storybooks?" His gaze followed her finger to the small bookcase across the room and a minute later the two were settled in for the reading of Sleeping Beauty. It didn't take very long for Emma's little eyes to fall closed and her breathing to even out letting Jack know she was finally asleep.
When he returned to the living room he found Claire alone watching television. Spying him she gave him a smile and waved him over to sit down.
"So all tucked in?" she asked cheerfully.
"Oh yeah. She wanted a story, but she's out like a light now."
"Aaron too, though he tried to fight it a bit."
"So, where's Sawyer?"
"Oh, he went to bed to read. I got him a murder mystery novel, actually a whole series, and he's all wrapped up in it."
Jack laughed. "I have to admit, I've never quite gotten used to the image of him as an avid reader. It just doesn't fit his personality."
"Oh I know. Remember those glasses he wore on the island?" Claire joined in with laughter. "He did look like a roughed up Harry Potter….but you know, he really does enjoy it. A lot of times he's the one that takes the kids to the library on Saturdays for story time."
"Really?"
"Oh yeah. They sometimes have puppet shows or they have story props for the kids to hold during the reading. You know, things to make it more fun and the kids really like it. They can even get Sawyer to stop for ice cream sometimes even if we do tell him it spoils their dinner…" Claire trailed off when she saw the sad look on Jack's face. "What's wrong?"
He shook it off. "Nothing. I was just thinking how he's doing things with me daughter that I should have been doing."
Claire reached over and gently touched his forearm in sympathy. "It was never like he was trying to be her father, Jack."
He nodded but didn't say anything, instead he looked down at the floor. Claire felt bad for him, for having missed out on this time with his daughter. She couldn't image not being there when Aaron took his first steps or said his first word. A part of her felt guilty for not trying harder to convince Kate to tell him the truth sooner.
"You know," she said softly. "none of that is important now. What matters is that you're here now and Emma is thrilled. She's gotten so attached to you in such a short amount of time and nobody, not Sawyer, not Phillip, would ever be able to fill that place for her."
Jack grimaced at the mention of Kate's fiancé. "Except that Phillip is going to be her stepfather and he'll probably end up spending more time with her than I will." He said as he abruptly stood up. "She'll probably end up crazy over him like Kate."
Claire stood up as well. "Kate is hardly crazy over him." She said firmly.
"Oh really? Well, she's wearing his ring, isn't she?"
Claire nodded. "But that's more of a reactionary gesture than anything else."
"Right."
"Jack, if Kate was crazy in love, don't you think she would have set a date by now? Or maybe even gotten married at the courthouse?"
The dark haired man looked over at her in curiosity. "I just figured they were still trying to find a compatible date, what with his business."
"Please." Claire replied dismissively, her Australian accent sounding a little heavier. "If it was up to Phillip they would have already set the date and be knee deep in the middle of plans. Kate is the one dragging her feet. And she won't even consider moving in with him."
Hearing this Jack cracked a smile. "Oh really?"
"Ah huh. So, Dr. Shepard, if you have any intentions of trying to get her back you need to start working on a plan."
"And what makes you think that's my intention?"
"You two were so in love before and I've seen the way you look at her, just like you did on the island. And believe me, women dream of having a man look at them like that."
Jack blushed and smiled for a moment, then his face turned serious. "She's engaged. And I'm sure now that I'm here Phillip is going to pull out all the stops where's Kate's concerned."
"Maybe," Claire conceded with a grin. "But Phillip doesn't have what you have going for him." She said slipping her arm through his.
"And what's that?"
The two made their way back over to the couch. "Well, for one whether she's ready to admit it or not, Kate is not over you, not by a long shot. She's just too scared to do anything about it."
"Okay." The two sat back down on the couch.
"And more importantly, you have three big guns in your camp ready to help. Me, Sawyer and…Emma."
Jack let out a small laugh at his friend's assessment. "Are you suggesting I use our daughter?"
"Every chance you get, buddy." Claire said firmly. "That bond you two have because of her, its one that Phillip can't break or make go away. Use it."
Jack let out a sigh as he sunk into the couch cushions. At this point he was willing to admit to himself and Claire that he did in fact want Kate back despite her lying to him about Emma and being engaged to another man. He still loved her. "Where do I start?"
Claire leaned back next to him. "I've got some ideas."
"You know, I always feel bad for Ducky." Claire commented as the pair were in the first few minutes of one of Claire's favorite movies, Pretty in Pink . "I mean, he really loved Andie."
"Well, he did have a fling with the record store owner." Jack pointed out. "And he did end up with that blonde at the prom, so it wasn't a total loss."
"Well, maybe, but she wasn't Andie."
"No, but if I remember in high school scoring an older woman was a pretty good thing."
Claire laughed. She still couldn't believe it when Jack had admitted that he was a fan of the John Hughes movies. "Maybe I feel bad for the Ducky character 'cause I went to high school with a couple of Duckys."
"Oh really? So, did that make you an Andie?" Jack teased.
Claire shook her head. "I was way too dark to be Andie. I was more gothic…like the Audry character Ali Sheedy played in Breakfast Club." She admitted. "Before the makeover, of course."
"You gothic? Hard to imagine."
"What about you, Jack?" Claire turned the conversation back to him. "I know you weren't a Ducky in high school."
"How can you be sure?" Jack asked.
Claire cocked her head to the side and looked at him. "Oh please, look at you. Tall, dark, handsome…heroic…you were the Homecoming King."
He laughed. "Actually I lost out to Larry Carter. He was the quarterback on the team."
"So, were you were more like a rich boy Blane…or the hunky guy in a red sportscar in Sixteen Candles…Jake."
Still laughing Jack shook his head. "Definitely not Jake. I drove a truck."
Claire nudged him. "So…who then?"
"Okay, if I had to pick, it would probably be the Emilio Estevez character in the Breakfast Club."
"The football player?"
"Yeah."
"You played football?"
"Wide receiver…high school and college."
"Wow," Claire said amazed. "Who knew? So, you ever duct tape some guy's butt cheeks?"
"No, but I did have the type of father that pushed you to excel." He replied off handily. "Though he preferred I did it academically, not on the football field."
Claire was thrown off by Jack's reference to his father, the man that could very well be her father as well. She suddenly wanted to know more. "You dad was… pushy?" She croaked out.
Jack shrugged his shoulders. "He had his ideas and expectations for his son and I didn't always…agree."
Claire nervously pulled at her shirt sleeve. "So, you two didn't get along?"
"Well, about as well as any head strong man and his equally stubborn son." He joked not really wanting to get into anything further.
"That's too bad." Claire said quietly before turning her attention back to the TV screen. Part of her was anxious to learn more about the man, but knew at this point it would be odd to ask more questions without asking why.
The two turned their attention back to the movie and were just getting to the part of the prom when Kate arrived home. She was surprised to find Jack was still there and Jack was surprised, pleasantly, to see that she was home and not staying at Phillips.
"We were just watching Pretty in Pink." Claire chirped. "Jack is a John Hughes fan." She winked at the slightly blushing man.
"Yeah, I remember." Kate said softly, not sure how to react since she and Jack hadn't said anything to each other after their argument earlier.
Sensing the tension between the two Claire reached over and shut off the TV. "I'm going to go to bed." She offered. "Sawyer's probably already asleep and I should make sure he didn't fall asleep with his face in the book." She added quickly and excused herself with a goodnight before either of them could say anything else.
"Subtle, isn't she?" Jack quipped. Kate gave him a small smile.
Not sure what to say next Jack glanced at his watch a bit nervously. "It's late, I should probably…"
"I'm sorry." Kate said suddenly. "About earlier, I shouldn't have snapped at you like that."
Jack's eyes seemed to warm at her apology. "I could probably have reacted better too."
Kate smiled at his automatic attempt to shoulder some of the blame for their fight. Did he even realize he did that? She thought. "You were just trying to look out for Emma." She replied out loud.
"For you too." He replied quickly before he had a chance to stop himself.
"Me?"
He nodded slowly silently debating his next words. "Kate, those things, what you were saying about Phillip, are those things that important to you?" he asked softly, trying to meet her gaze, search those green eyes he knew so well for the answer.
"What things?"
"The trips, the jewelry…gifts?"
She shook her head looking down at her feet for a moment. "No, of course not!"
He nodded but didn't say anything, happy to see she hadn't changed that much.
"Phillip's not a bad guy." Kate continued. "He's proud of what he's accomplished and he likes to enjoy the benefits."
"Okay."
"What Jack?"
"Nothing, Kate."
Drawing her hands to her hips she flashed him a look that told him she didn't believe him.
"He came off a little strong." He finally admitted.
"I know, but he was probably just a bit nervous." Kate defended. "He won't admit it, but this whole situation has thrown him for a loop."
"He should try being in my shoes." Jack mumbled then looked away for a moment. "Sorry."
Kate shook her head. "Don't be." She reached out and gently touched his arm looking up into those dark brown eyes that she knew so well. "Look, Jack, this situation is…for lack of a better word, awkward, for all of us. But we need to make it work for all our sakes, especially Emma."
"I know." He replied softly as he nodded his head. "We'll make it work."
Kate gave him a small smile and nodded as well. "Good, because she is so thrilled that you're here it's not even funny."
Jack's face seemed to brighten up at her comment. "You think so?"
"I know so." Kate's face went serious. "You know, she had asked me about you just before you showed up."
"Yeah?"
"She wanted to know about you and where you were."
Jack was surprised. "What did you tell her?"
"I told her that her daddy was a doctor in L.A. and that while he didn't know about her, I knew that when he did find out, that nothing would stop him from being with her and loving her." She told him emotionally. "And I was right."
Jack was touched by what the young woman had said to their daughter. "So, you always knew I wouldn't walk away from this…from her?"
She nodded. "Never doubted it." She replied firmly.
He grinned and shoved his hands in his front pockets of his jeans. The stood there for a moment losing in each other's gaze before remembering their current situation. "I should probably go." Jack said softly. "It's getting late."
Kate nodded reluctantly. "Yeah." She followed him to the front door. "Ahum…you know, Emma has ballet class in the morning…"
"Oh, okay." He jumped in. "I guess I can see her after."
"Or you could come with us." Kate offered up quickly.
Jack was surprised by her invitation. "You wouldn't mind?"
"No, of course not. But I warn you, there's only one other dad in the group." She teased. "And the rest of the mothers are going to be wanting to know all about you."
He chuckled. "Okay, consider me warned."
Holding the door she nodded, feeling good that she had extended the invitation. "Oh, also, we'll probably be taking Aaron to his soccer game after, unless you want to beg off of that."
"No, that's okay. I can go."
Kate grinned. "Okay, well, then, I'll see you in the morning then."
Jack returned her smile. "I'll be here."
"I'll have the coffee ready for you."
Chuckling he turned to leave but then stopped a moment later looking back at the brunette. "I…ahum…didn't get a chance to thank you earlier for letting me read the baby journal." He said sincerely.
"So you liked it?"
He nodded. "Yeah, it was really nice. I'm glad you decided to keep a record of the pregnancy."
She nodded. "I thought it was important since you weren't…you know, here." She finished in a small voice.
He bobbed his head in agreement. "Thanks for the pictures of Emma too. I got to show them to my mom and Marc before I left."
Kate was surprised somewhat. "You told your mom then?"
"Yeah, I needed to tell her why I was leaving and I thought she needed to know."
Kate looked down at the floor for a moment then looked up. "What did she say?" She was almost frightened to hear the answer fearing Margo now hated her.
Jack guessed her anxiousness. "Well, she's excited about being a grandmother. She can't wait to meet Emma."
"That's good." She shifted from one foot to another. "I'm sure she probably hates me now."
Jack shook his head. "Actually I think she's reserving judgment at this point. She figures you had your reasons…" he trailed off. "I'm not sure she agrees with them."
Kate nodded as she pressed her lips together. She expected Margo to be angry with her, even confront her the next time they saw each other, so the idea that she was attempting to keep an open mind seemed like a bonus. The last thing she wanted was for Emma to not be accepted by Jack's family, his mother in particular.
"Well, at least she wants to meet Emma." She said softly.
Jack nodded. "Yeah, she does."
The conversation trailed off and after a moment Jack cleared his throat.
"Well, I'll go." He announced.
"Okay."
"So, I'll see you in the morning."
Kate nodded. "Okay."
"Good Night."
"Night."
TBC
Coming Up: Claire get her news and Jack reacts.
