Chapter 52: Thoughts and Decisions
*Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters therein.
Previously: Lucius licked his lips as he smirked and stared into the dazed eyes of his lover.
"I love you."
25 Dec. 1997
Lucius' Quarters
Remus Lupin sat on his lover's couch in the dark. There was nothing wrong, per se, but he was feeling overwhelmed.
Well, it wasn't a bad thing, all things considered, but still Remus couldn't decide what he should think about the last twenty four hours or so.
Love.
It wasn't that Remus was starved for affection. His parents had been kind, and attentive, even after his...accident. He'd had friends and lovers in his time. Even during the darkest of years after Sirius' incarceration he'd had people to talk to, fleeting though they were.
But none of that prepared him for this. Love, from a young boy who relied on him. A child that he should have had in Harry, until that was taken from him. Love, from a man who should peer upon him like mud beneath his boot.
Yet, he had no clue what to say to either of them. He was a werewolf. A placid one, by far, but a werewolf nonetheless. He could not adopt Declan, not magically. His status eliminated that option with no margin for questioning. Nor could he adopt by muggle means. He had no papers, nor did the boy, for that matter. He had little means with which to prove his worth in the muggle world...and yet.
"Can I be your's now like Draco?"
How did one answer that? How do you tell a child that his perception is wrong because he sleeps in a shelter for other orphans. Or that he cannot be adopted because of the same affliction he had, and that any inkling of his furry little problem would mean a life of being watched by Ministry Officials. A life of never being allowed in Hospital, being avoided on the street and taken in for "questioning" after full moons for petty crimes in areas you were nowhere near.
An uneducated life where no school nor tutor would have you the minute you were found out.
Remus shook his head and the melancholy with it. He could feel the tiny, delicate chain around his neck. It was virtually weightless, but felt infinitely heavier. It wasn't the chain itself, but what lay on it that kept his focus.
A betrothal ring-the Malfoy betrothal ring to be exact.
Flashback
Lucius licked his lips as he smirked and stared into the dazed eyes of his lover.
"I love you."
"I….What?" Remus stammered, trying to bring enough blood back to his brain to comprehend those three little words as his chest bloomed with something he hadn't felt in years.
A tiny tendril of Hope.
"I, Lucius Malfoy, love you, Remus Lupin," Lucius said, a tiny, smug smirk upon his lips. He knew his lover was addled, but to see such a bright man taken so far from just his mouth...it was a heady power.
Still Remus couldn't process. "I'm sorry? Love. Did you say love?"
Lucius simply nodded and, using the tiniest ounce of power, summoned his wand to him. "Accio Little Blue Box," he said with little emotion, catching the small trinket box as it soared to him.
"You know," Lucius started, not waiting for Remus to catch up to him mentally. "As a boy, I was told to expect an arranged marriage. I never thought to have love, nor affection, merely enough sexual exchanges to beget an heir and a spare, then take a lover of my own."
Lucius never looked away from the sandy hair man above him. "I never took one. A lover, that is. Narcissa was an insanely jealous woman, and any liaisons I had were one-offs in remote areas. I would never call them lovers. Until you."
"I...Lucius…"
"I grew up never expecting to find love, but I have. It simply took my son, my heir, being de-aged to see that what I needed was to find someone who could love the best part of me with no reservations. Draco is the best thing I've ever made. No amount of atonement will make up for my wrongs, but to find someone who will stand by me regardless and love my son as his own…"
Lucius trailed off, lost in thought, but still Remus didn't have words. He was stunned, even more so when Lucius slid from the bed, kneeling by the side and pulling Remus to sit facing him. Remus gave his hand as it was pulled, unsure of what could be happening until Lucius lifted the ring box.
"Will you be mine, Remus? Will you love my son as your own, and allow my to love the son-of-your-heart as mine?"
"I...I. Lucius, I can't. The laws…"
"The laws be damned, Remus! I am Lucius Malfoy, and you are for all intent the Godfather to the Boy-Who-Lived. Laws will change. I want to know what you want."
"Yes, of course I want you, but-"
"Good." Lucius barreled over his buts, lifting the betrothal ring and conjuring a long chain for it. "The style may not be to your liking, but it is a Malfoy ring, imbued with defenses befitting the station of its wearer. I'd ask you keep it close to your skin, but I know you're an intelligent man."
Remus nodded as the chain settled into his palm, his fingers being moved by Lucius' t close around the jewelry. It was light for all the ring meant to him. It weighted him in spirit if not physically. "I...Really?" It was all he could think.
Lucius smirked once more, his Slytherin side purring for the cunning use of the situation to get the desired effect. Lucius leaned up and forward, kissing Remus long and hard. "Yes. Truly. If you would have me and my son, we will be your's. It cannot be publicly known, not until He is taken down, but you will not be my dirty secret."
"I...I need a minute, Lucius. I...shower." And with that he ran. the ring left on the bed sheet next to Remus' pillow.
Remus ran a hand through his still damp hair.
He couldn't believe this could be his. He had done nothing but be himself, and a part of him could not believe that "himself" was enough to gain someone's love. Who would want him? A poor werewolf. No family, few friends, and mental baggage to fill a department store.
But he loved. As much as he did not want to admit to himself he could not fathom a life outside of all he had gained in the last few months. A life without Harry and Declan, little Draco and Lucius...it hurt. Remus had lived through a harsh life of pain and humiliation, condemnation. He'd been poor in money and soul many a day, living in squalor and through loneliness. But he had lived. He'd never given in, though depression had taken him to the knife's edge more than once.
And yet…
Of all he'd seen, this. This would break him. Losing this would be the death of him.
Then why are you out here, alone, when everything you've needed is in the bedroom? A voice whispered to him. Stop being a coward and take it.
Remus rose from the couch before his fears took control of him once more. He walked to the bedroom, pushing the door open softly, his eyes immediately drawn to Lucius as he sat at his desk. He looked...vulnerable, was the first word to come to Remus. He was bent over, elbows on his thighs as he stared at the betrothal ring's chain hanging from his hands, swinging softly. The silver ring glinted in the soft light in the room. It occurred to Remus that the oval grey-blue gem topping the ring almost perfectly matched that of Lucius and Draco's eyes.
With a shaking breath Remus moved into their room, his pajama bottoms riding low on his hips, scars on display as he knelt in front of his lover and covered Lucius' hands with his own. He looked into the jewel-tone eyes and searched for something. What he didn't know, but he found something that steeled his resolve.
"I love you," he said simply and tilted his head to allow the chain to slip over it, only smiling as he felt the ring touch his chest, the warm glow of love and protection radiating through his limbs the second it settled. "For every day we have, I will love you, Lucius."
"Just what is going on here?" Severus asked, then paused just enough for dramatic effect in the tense silence. "Would anyone care to explain to me what you dunderheads could find so utterly entertaining that I was alerted by our House Ghost whilst in the middle of a Faculty Meeting?"
For a time no one dared say a word, then, all at once utter chaos erupted as everyone tried to explain their side before the other had the chance to paint their side that of the sympathetic cause.
"Professor! Help us!" One of the girls beside Daphne yelled before casting at a boy who had crept too close.
"Snape!" A Death Eater in Training called gruffly, hand outstretched as if asking "what are you going to do about these madmen?"
"Shit! They brought Longbottom." Another whispered, though not quiet enough to avoid detection.
"MMPH!" One of the hostages tried saying.
Severus need only say, "Silence."
The room grew still as no one dare even move, fearful of drawing their former Head of House's attention.
"Theodore Nott," Severus called his Prefect's name.
"Yes, Sir?" Theo called, but did not move, keeping his wand trained on a vicious girl who had been reaching for something in her cloak only moments before.
"Explain."
"Daphne and I acted on our duty as Prefects to keep the Slytherin House contained and out of illegal matters, Sir." Theo said simply. He sent a hex at the girl, as her fingers twitched, an incarcerous knocking her back in braided rope wrappings.
"And what illegal matters would that entail, Mr. Nott?" Severus asked coolly. He refused to give either side any inkling of how his loyalties or appearance thereof would fall. He needed all options available to him.
"It seems their Master set them a mission for the Winter Break." Theo waved to the opposition. "Bring the body of the de-aged Draco Malfoy to Him, dead or alive, and kidnap one Harry Potter. It seems that while they could not write home with as many details as they would have liked, enough got back to the Odious One that he charged them with a feat even he could not complete. Every child of a Death Eater received the missive, but they never imagined that their spawn could be independent." Theo laughed bitterly.
"We refuse to join the Halfblood Maniac!" A cheer rose up behind him from the rebel children. "We've played along with this scum until today when these three decided to push their timetable and hunt down the little Malfoy. So, we took them down."
Another incarcerous flew, this time from a wee second year to a fifth year that crept too close to him.
Severus could feel the fury boiling in a corner of his mind as Harry watched the proceedings. He also knew that the anger was not for the charge on his life, but for the danger Draco could have been in.
Stay yourself. You cannot enter. Not now, lest you ruin all our plans. Go to my quarters or calm yourself.
He projected to Harry, but did not stay long enough for the no doubt colorful reply.
"Mr. Flint," Severus called forth Marcus Flint's younger brother, Antonin. "What do you have to say?" He could see that the younger Flint looked to be a ringleader, the way his fists clenched every few seconds.
"He's lying, Professor. T'ere be no letters. Why would the Dark Lord give us such? We're jus' children, tryin' teh finish our schoolin' and wha'not." He slathered on his oiliest smile, forgetting his accent momentarily as he thought that Snape was the only adult in power in the room. It was the Slytherin Common Room, after all. "Couldn't we solve this in house, Sir? It's just a case of miscommunication. I'm sure they'll understand better just what could be at stake here if you told them…They could even write home..."
No one noticed Aurora stepping to the side, hand against Hogwart's stones as she cast, "Petrificus Totalis Maxima!" Her wand swept over the right side of the room, wafting over Daphne, Theo and their band of vengeful rebels.
As she watched the Death Eater children grin maliciously, all hands going for wands and no doubt Dark Curses while their enemies were unable to defend themselves, she remained in place and cast a similar spell to before over the left side of the room, this time maximizing the effects of a "stupefy!"
She watched as each of them dropped like flies, uncaring of the odd angles and uncomfortable poses many of them fell into. She saw the approving look on Snape's face. "Never thought I'd need to use that this quickly…"
"Nor will you ever need it again, I imagine," Snape replied. "Being Head of House comes with perks, but as always there are drawbacks to Slytherin no one else has to contend with."
"Ah, but Severus, it is not only Slytherin students who have in-fighting," Flitwick said. "I've used that spell myself many a day! Oh, the curses a Ravenclaw can find! Some would put your Slytherins to shame! Why, one year after a particularly nasty fight over study tables-"
"I've heard of that used in Gryffindor House, as well," Augusta chimed in, cutting Filius off in order to save them from an hour long story. "And my late Husband was the instigator of such a fight in Hufflepuff House that it was used there as well. Merriweather used it in my day after Quidditch wins to get his House to actually sleep."
Snape only gave a nod that he understood before turning to the wreckage in the room, though he could feel amusement in the back of his mind at that last tidbit. All he could do was think about the paths before him and how to navigate from here.
On one hand he could toss the little blighters out on their ears, send them home to Mum and Da, but then his position would be for naught with the Dark Lord. Alternatively, he could toss them in a dungeon. Merlin knew they had plenty of extra oubliettes and catacombs, but talk would start when only a third of Slytherin House's upperclassmen returned...especially since none of them had ever left the grounds for break.
It's time to retire, Severus. You know it. Come home.
Severus hid a shiver at hearing Harry's words inside his head, only a whisper as he shadowed away, preparing for what Severus knew had been coming for weeks now.
It was time to remove the Dark Mark, once and for all.
The streets of London were foggy and cold that night. The children were scared and hurting, but they were free. They didn't know why they were free, and at every turn they gasped and flinched, hoping for something, anything, to tell them they were finally safe.
Their parents were gone, taken by the men who had kidnapped them all. The white masks and long black cloaks starring in each of their nightmares alongside the injections and doctors who tormented them daily.
As the eldest, though not the biggest, Rosaria knew she had to get herself and the others warm and dry and safe. She was barely nine, the youngest of her siblings, still dressed in the red and white polka dot dress she had on after school the day she'd been taken. The children gathered to her, looking to her for comfort and guidance. Anything to keep their fears from taking over.
Rosaria had long been separated from Reid, her oldest brother who had been her strength those first few days after they were taken. But the bad men had quickly noticed and taken him away from her. She'd had to grow up, become the big sister to the little kids she'd been kept with-that or lose her mind with the fear as they had been on the edge of.
But that was then. In the nasty cells filled with despair and fear. Now she was free. They were free and they were once again starting to feel fear. Rosaria had not been to London very often in her nine years, but her Mother told her tales of kidnappers and rapists and men who preyed on children in alleys.
But after the last few weeks all she could think was...well, bump those men. She'd faced worst in those cells. She'd faced her nightmares, but now she was free. Nothing bad could continue to happen, could it?
She gathered and pushed and pulled the children around her, getting them all off the side street and huddled together on the sidewalk until she could figure out just where they had been left. It was dark out, but she remembered the men around her making her push herself, push with all her soul to make miracles happen in the cells.
If ever she needed a miracle, it was now.
With all the concentration in her tiny body, emaciated from weeks of malnutrition, she pushed and pushed, feeling like she was exerting every last ounce of her being in making something happen.
She just wanted to be safe and warm.
She heard the gasps and sighs of relief from behind her, and saw heat rising from the concrete beneath their bottoms. They huddled and grew warm, covered behind a few garbage bins.
It was here that the windowless van stopped and the men swarmed them, grabbing them all before they could even make a noise.
Thanks for reading!
