Author's Note: Jingle Bells, Fyre spells, Over 1,000 words! They make up, lots of humor, and a mention of birds (Where?)
Chapter 52: The Avie Awards, Part 2
*Cheesy Theme Song Music*
Jiao-Jie pushed Summer away from the podium. The blonde's response was a shriek, followed by a thud and either blood or ketchup. I'm gonna say it was ketchup. "Hello, and welcome to the Avie's! I'm your new co-host Jiao-Jie –"
"AND I WAS NAMED AFTER FIRE!"
Jiao-Jie swatted her forehead. "This is why people don't take us seriously, Fyre! We need to start awards before you mess everything up!" She shouted, grabbing an Avie and shaking it at Fyre angrily. Fyre narrowed her eyes.
"I mess everything up? I wrote this sto – oh." Fyre scratched her head. "Never mind, then."
The screens suddenly came alive with flashing colors. "WINNER!" A loud voice proclaimed. Fyre and Jiao-Jie stared in horror.
Jiao-Jie sighed unhappily. "Okay, so Summer mentioned before that your reviewers don't understand ice, as only three of them voted. I also believe the ice thing now." She pointed over at Sofia and Heart, who were staring at a cup full of ice. Jiao-Jie rolled her eyes. "I hate my job."
Cliff Hanger – Crossroads of Destiny, Sozin's Comet: Into the Inferno, The Winter Solstice: Part 1
WINNER – TIE: Crossroads of Destiny and Into the Inferno
"What do we do for a tie?" Jiao-Jie asked, looking at the screens. The screens were all currently having heart attacks, flashing between clips from the two episodes at the speed of light. The screen then began to have a freak-out as Aang and Zuko got shot with lightning at the same time. Jiao-Jie sighed, looking over at Azula, who was smirking evilly.
Fyre smiled. "In the event of a Tie, Fyre's vote rules over all!"
"What about Jiao-Jie's vote?"
"Her vote fails. Anyways, Fyre's vote is for ITI, because the video game that was named after it was hilarious. I mean, their mouths only move half the time, and then the messed up the series, with Azula shooting Zuko with lightning and then it just cut off. And then Ozai's cellmate? Classic!"
The audience stared in horror.
'The screen showed Zuko getting shot with lightning, Aang in his little Earth-ball, some epic fight scenes, the comet going by, the evil high-pitched Ozai laughter, Azula going insane, and then part of the waffle song.'
Jiao-Jie stared at it. "What was that?"
"I think we broke its brains," Fyre said, her eyes scanning the screen. She then made a five minute long speech about what shot they should give it to make it feel better.
Jiao-Jie looked over at Passion. "Play the next clip before Fyre explodes."
"KA-BOOM!"
Cliff Diver - Bella Swan
Fyre stared in horror at the screen. "Wait...what?"
Panakin sat in her own little corner, playing with her iPod, watching trailers for Breaking Dawn. Every eye turned to her. Every incredibly irritated eye (The screen had begun to play clips of Twilight) "What did I do? It's not my fault that – okay it was me. The original winner was Azula."
'The clip showed Azula falling off the cliff in 'Southern Raiders'. It then showed her being magically saved (Never understood that scene...I think it was her hairpin?), followed by the giant marshmallow creature from the movie Ghostbusters.'
Fyre looked at the screen. "Never saw that movie, yet somehow I remember that. Weird, right?"
Azula, who was now on the stage with her Avie, looked over at Fyre. "No the only weird thing around here..." she sing-songed. Fyre glared over at her, so Azula instantly smiled, waved to the audience, and jumped off the stage.
Cliff...Aang Moment – 'Will you go Penguin-sledding with me?', 'Swirly Air thing in the desert – Katara calms him down', 'ENERGYBENDING!'
WINNER – ENERGYBENDING
'The screen showed the greatest light show ever, then a clip of Panakin hitting Ozai over the head with a frying pan.'
"Yeah...the screen's broken," Panakin said quickly, hiding a frying pan behind her back. Fyre just smiled at her.
Jiao-Jie smiled. "So, what are your reviewers to fail at voting for next?" She asked like she was reading a script. Picture anyone on an infomercial, and you get the picture. If only we had a Sham-Wow. Fyre smiled back.
"I am glad you asked, Jiao-Jie! Next up we have some fun categories, including, but not limited to, the following," Fyre said.
Best Avatar Line – Sokka - "It's the Quinchiest!" Katara – "I'M COMPLETELY CALM!" Zuko – "Why am I so bad at being GOOD?"
Best Avatar Episode – The Ember Island Players, The Boy in the Iceberg, The Blind Bandit, The Serpent's Pass
Best Avatar Character – Azula, Katara, Aang, Sokka, Toph, Zuko.
Iroh coughed from his place backstage. Fyre simply shrugged at the list and circled 'Azula' on her voting slip. Fyre looked back up at the camera. "But act fast and get two for the price of one! Just pay for shipping, handling, processing, building, randomness, actor's pay, two more of our products, a Fyre-head, your very own Fire Lord Zuko, plus fifty extra dollars for heaven knows what!"
"EDUCATION!" The screens, which now showed a picture of
Fyre frowned. "Okay...um...well I was thinking about how, you know, the series doesn't make sense, and what not, and that one fanfic that I read...and then I started thinking about Sozin's Comet...because of the Tie? And I started thinking 'If Azula was really about to shoot Katara with lightning, wouldn't water just make it electrocute both of them? Plus the metal grate below...it just doesn't make sense.' So what about that? And they could do more 'This doesn't make sense, What If Mike and Bryan thought it through?' things."
Jiao-Jie glared at her. "You and your sister talk too much."
Fyre sighed. "Moments in the series that don't make sense - there are a lot of them - and what if they did."
Jiao-Jie raised an eyebrow. "O...kay. Anything else, queen of talking?"
"This is the last time to vote for the categories mentioned in chapter 49. So far we've had two people nominate stuff – Sofia and Bob – so the rest of you people need to, as well." Fyre glanced over at Spry, who suddenly gave a 'What did I do?' look.
The screen suddenly began to speak to them again. "The Nominees are:
"Greatest Story: InspiredByFyre by Marvin
"Best Random Ship moment: Zuko-as-Aang with Katara: Zuanara (Author?)
"Weirdest Story: Brownies? by Bananas
"Best Chapter in FGTC: 36; Iroh, 1; Kidnapped!
"Fyre Award: Week of Fyre by Bananas
"Panakin Award: Found by Fyre
"Summer Award: Week of Fyre by Bananas
"Jiao-Jie award: Brownies? by Bananas
"Passion Award: Found by Fyre, Winner by Panakin (I'll allow it, Sofia)"
Fyre and Jiao-Jie turned back to the audience. "So far, it looks like Bananas is going to win a whole lot of awards, and like no one likes to nominate things. Except Bob, but I think he just likes getting mentioned," Jiao-Jie said, shrugging.
"Hold on there, Jiao-Jie," Fyre said. "I have an opinion in this too. And before you ask, you do not. My nominees are Sick of Tea, by Bob, Cabbage Mersa from 'Love is a Garden', Elevator Talk by Luna Cat Kitty, and Chapter 27; I AM NOT CRAZY!. OH, and for the Jiao-Jie award, I nominate Bring me All Your Elderly! I think all of those can be found in my faves, if not, let me know."
Jiao-Jie just blinked. "Okay."
Passion shook her head. "Fyre needs meds before I co-host. I won't do it unless she does."
Panakin sighed. "On it."
Author's Note: Uh-oh. Better run!
