Remember the Name
A Naruto x Harry Potter Crossover
By
EvilFuzzy9
"I keep six honest serving-men,
They taught me all I knew;
Their names are What and Why and When
And How and Where and Who."
- Rudyard Kipling
A/N: Okay, so this chapter borrows a bit of dialogue from A Peck of Owls, with Harry (who, may I remind you, has been kept pretty much completely out of the loop) trying to figure out just what the hell is going on.
I actually got most of this chapter written up yesterday, but then I got distracted after uploading the previous two, in part thanks to Naruto Shippuden Ultimate Ninja Impact, where I got into playing Itachi and wound up grinding him up all the way from level 39 to level 70 (and at that level, his stats are very similar to Sasuke's, except for a noticeably higher Ninjutsu (it's hard to tell exactly, since it measures stats with a sort of graph and doesn't actually show numerical values for them)). Also, Sage Mode Naruto is absolute rape against basically anything and everything in that game. Sadly, Bee's a little awkward to play, and Sakura's Attack stat is nothing special (which I say is bullshit).
And don't even get started on how poorly they handled Danzō, or Pain... Still, if they released another Naruto game in that style, with basically the same gimmick, some more characters, and maybe better balancing, I would totally buy the shit out of it. Even if I had to buy a PSVita to play it (and I have no current intentions of buying a PSVita, since it is incompatible with PSP memory cards, so that should tell you how much I enjoy the play-style of that game).
[8/16/2012 - EDIT: Fixed a spacing error that was pointed out by SaturnXK.]
The walk back to Number Four Privet Drive was a tense one. Harry had managed to mostly calm down, no longer jumping at every little thing sound. The same could not be said for Mrs. Figg, who kept throwing nervous glances over her shoulder every few seconds.
"Don't put that wand away, boy!" she sharply reminded Harry, who had been about to do just that as he struggled with lugging his large cousin down the street. "I won't be any use if those things come back!"
"Why not?" Harry asked her, nearly panting with exertion. "You... You are a — er — you know — a witch, right? Can't you just drive them off with a Patronus?"
"Oh heavens, no!" said Mrs. Figg, absently worrying at her hairnet. "I'm no witch, boy. Never so much as transfigured a teabag my whole life."
"What — ?" Harry said, surprised, "But — "
"I'm a squib, dear — " she explained, before pausing for a second, looking back at Harry. " — you... do know what a squib is, don't you?" she asked him, a strange look on her face that Harry couldn't quite place.
When he nodded yes, she visibly relaxed.
"Oh, good, good," she said, sounding relieved. "I'd hate to have to explain it to you now of all times... Never thought it was a good idea, having you raised around muggles, you know, especially not with ones like Petunia or Vernon..." she muttered. "It's a marvel they didn't throw you out the second they found you on their doorstep, knowing them. My, but I remember how Petunia screamed when she found you there. I'll never understand why she consented to take you in, either – it's clear as anything the woman simply can't stand magic – but then I guess Dumbledore did know what he was doing, after all..."
Harry frowned slightly. "You — er — know Dumbledore?" he asked her.
"Of course I know Dumbledore," Mrs. Figg responded offhandedly, "Who doesn't know Dumbledore?"
"Oh..." Harry said weakly. He was silent for a moment, before asking, "Who's Mundungus Fletcher, then? Was he the one who apparated away in front of my house?"
"He was indeed, the scoundrel!" said she. "Honestly, running off and leaving you without any protection!"
"Er, protection?" Harry said quizzically.
Mrs. Figg eyed Harry strangely for a moment, before saying, "Yes, protection, though why they thought that idiot could ever count as such is quite simply beyond me..."
"Um," said Harry nervously, "Who are 'they'?"
Mrs. Figg frowned, looking left and right like she was checking for something, before turning to Harry and telling him, "Nothing you need to worry about right now. Not while we're out here in the open... Alastor would kill me if I compromised anything."
Harry frowned.
"Alastor?" he said disbelieving. "Do you mean as in, Alastor Moody? The auror?"
Mrs. Figg sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. "No wonder Hagrid can never keep a secret from you three for very long, with how nosy just one of you can be! But you'd best be careful about asking too many questions, Harry," she warned him. "We can't afford to have people getting suspicious, you understand..."
Harry's frown deepened. He did stop prodding, however reluctantly it was. He still had so many more questions to ask, but it was clear to him that he wasn't going to be getting any answers just yet.
They walked the rest of the way to the Dursley's without further incident, and Mrs. Figg dropped him off outside the door, saying that if the Dursleys found out about her, they wouldn't allow her around any more.
So Harry bid her farewell and reluctantly turned to open the door, only to hear Mrs. Figg shouting, "MUNDUNGUS FLETCHER, I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!" which was followed by a loud crack.
Faintly, his ears ringing from the volume of his neighbor's scream, Harry heard a man's voice saying, "'S' up, Figgy? What 'appened to staying undercover?"
Then Mrs. Figg cried, "I'll give you undercover! Dementors, you useless, skiving sneak thief!"
Naturally, that was when Uncle Vernon swung open the front door, roaring, "WHAT IS WITH ALL THAT INFERNAL RACKET?" only to be nearly bowled over by a squat, unshaven, ginger-haired man in a ratty overcoat, who appeared to be fleeing from an infuriated Mrs. Figg.
Harry sighed.
This was going to be troublesome. He just knew it.
TTFN and R&R!
translation notes:
none
