Disclaimer: Kubo still owns Bleach.
A/N: Yeey! Hello folks! Missed me? Haha *Ahem* First of all, I would like to apologize for a few things. I'm sorry to keep you waiting and I sincerely implore your forgiveness because I actually failed you people. Remember that promise I gave you in the last chapter? The one about me finishing the story before updating again? Well, I actually failed in doing that. I was planning to keep my word but fate had some other plans for me. So, I'm going to be honest with you that within the whole month of my absence, I only managed to write one chapter. Yes, ONE CHAPTER! So, I am so sorry for not being able to keep my promise. Actually, I haven't been in touch with my laptop for long time because of too much moving around.
And I take back what I said. Instead I'll reframe my timeline and I'll try to resume my weekly update scheduling instead (or possibly longer since I'm moving into another city. But who knows, I might feel inspired being alone and lonely hahaha). At least you know that I still have a life outside the cyber world!
By the way, thank you for all the reviews, favorites and follows for the story. I'll guess you'll be seeing me more often.
P.S: Still no edist and rereads so pardon me.
53. Chapter 14: Of Name and Power [ End-Point ]
I had the whole day in school debating with myself if meeting Kurosaki Masaki was the best option to take. I didn't have the heart to refuse the person who could be considered my second mother…my only mother figure since mom had passed away. Masaki-san's invitation may have sounded a little pushy but I know that it was of good nature. However, the fact that she wanted to meet in her home was a little awkward, adding to the possibility of me coming across Kurosaki Ichigo unintendedly. And it will be problematic if Kuchiki Senna gets a wind of it. She doesn't exactly know the extent of my relationship with Ichigo and explaining things to her would be difficult.
" You look so deep in thoughts, Kuchiki." Grimmjow's voice came out of nowhere as I was treading down the hallway after classes.
I had to stop on my tracks and look up to find the blue fireball leaning comfortably on the wall near the staircase, surprisingly his lackeys were within his radius, chatting with each other. " I see you more often than I see my own father."
" I'm everywhere so it's not surprising." Jaegerjaquez gave a shrug and confidently smirked my way. " If you're actually thinking about completely forgetting Kurosaki and coming into my arms instead, don't worry. You have my full support."
The way the guy delivered it was too confident, too airy that others would find it rather offensive instead. However, spending some time around with this blue panther, I've already gotten a jest of his personality and found this completely normal coming from him—overbearing, yes—but natural still. So despite myself, I only spared him an exhausted look before letting out a sigh. It wasn't a good time to indulge him. " If that's what you want, I'm completely fine with it." I simply replied. " Well, I'll be on my way now. Later." Bidding him that, I continued walking towards the front entrance of the school building.
" You'll actually grew old faster if you keep stressing yourself over little things." Persistently and contrary to what I was hoping for, Grimmjow hadn't dropped our conversation yet and instead walked beside me, matching my sluggish pace with half strides and a slouch, leaving behind his lackeys without a word. The only positive result however was the fact that students who saw us coming began to step aside and make way for us. This guy comes in handy sometimes. But mostly, he just annoys me or bugs me unceasingly. Not that I hold it against him or anything. He's a pretty good guy and we're cool with each other. " You see, if you'd chosen me instead of Kurosaki, you actually wouldn't have to go through all this drama."
" Well, you sound convincing." I dryly replied as we were already stepping out of the building, school gates already in sight bustling with students leaving as well.
" Of course." He regarded me with a loop-side smile so handsome yet so annoying. Even some girls managed to get a glimpse of it and began swooning over him, forgetting momentarily that he was notorious. " If anything else, you're probably the luckiest girl alive to have me going after you. What more could you actually ask for a man when you already have me?" It was a rhetorical question. Of course.
I rolled my eyes hearing his words. Those weren't baseless remarks so I couldn't refute that. But really, he didn't have to rub it on my face " I'm already flattered, thank you." I answered sarcastically.
I heard him scoff beside me as we were exiting the gates. " That's the only response I get? I thought more spirit than that?" He paused for a moment, possibly waiting for anything from me but when I remained quiet, he moved in front of me, blocking my way and held my chin, titling my head to look at him. He had that determined look on his face, his eyes blazing with passion looking at me intently and wry smile that made him look more dashing. Smoothly, in a husky baritone voice, he told me. " If you want it that way, fine with me. The first time, I stepped down and tried to let you guys have a happy ever after but this time, there's no holding back."
" Grimm—"
" Shhhh…" He hushed, cutting me. " As far as I remember, you haven't actually rejected me so I'm totally cool with stealing you away from Kurosaki." Jaegerjaquez said darkly. " However, I'll stop if you tell me so." I was aware of the people that were staring at this bizzare scene Grimmjow was creating but then it faded in the background with the intensity of his gaze and the power of his words. For a moment, I was rendered bereft of speech.
" Rukia-chan!" A cheery call jolted me back to reality. With Grimmjow's hold on my chin loosening a bit, I managed to turn and found a smiling Kurosaki Masaki standing by the gate. " Oh, you're with Grimmjow-san. Are you two…?" She trailed off, possibly not exactly knowing what to say, leaving the rest of her words to my imagination.
The blue-head let go of my chin and regarded the Kurosaki woman with a curt nod and an informal 'hey' before turning back to me, placing a hand on my shoulder casually and levelling his lip to my ear, whispering. " I'm serious about the things I said." Then he gave me a light squeeze before heading back inside the campus.
" Masaki-san." I acknowledge the woman who was giving a curious look.
" Are you going out with Grimmjow-san?" Was the first thing she asked after the ordeal, a teasing smile on her pretty face.
Blush rose on my face due to embarrassment. " W-what? No!" I said rather forcefully. " We're just friends."
There was a contemplative pause from the older woman's side first before saying. " He seems to have something else in mind though."
" I…I don't know." I simply answered, finding no necessity to tell her of my personal matters with other people.
A pleasant chuckle came from the Kurosaki household's mistress as she looked at me with soft eyes. " I'm just teasing Rukia-chan."
Wanting to immediately change topic, I cleared my throat and asked the first question that entered my mind. " So, uhmmm, Masaki-san. Why are you here? Are you going to see uh…your son?"
" No." The chestnut haired woman immediately replied with a gentle smile. " I'm here for you Rukia-chan. I thought it would be nice if I waited for you outside school and walk with you back to my house since Ichigo couldn't."
" Oh…uh…okay." An awkward smile emerged on my face. I guess sometimes the answer comes after you instead of you chasing it. " Thanks." I added with an unsure tone in my voice. My eyes then wandered around for any sign of orange. With his mother here, it seems meeting Ichigo would be unavoidable.
" Let's go?" Prompted the Kurosaki woman, much to my surprise. When I didn't bulge from where I stood, Masaki-san had this confused look on her face, perhaps matching mine. " Is there something wrong Rukia-chan?"
I immediately shook my head to contradict. " Uh… yeah, let's." Then we began walking side by side towards the direction of Kurosaki residence. I was actually half expecting Ichigo to show up and join us or Senna jump out of nowhere. But with either of the two happening, I felt both relief and disappointed—torn between which emotion should actually prevail. The former seems more appealing but the latter seems what my heart favoured.
Our walk was pleasant with Masaki-san throwing random questions at me to pass time, regarding school and my father. She voiced out how pleased she was with me coming to visit which made me feel a little guilty of actually having to think over about running away instead.
" We're finally here." She declared once we were already in front of the familiar house. It still gave the homey feeling like the first time I came here. Masaki-san invited me inside and was welcomed with silence.
" Nobody else is at home actually." The lady of the house told me as she offered me to take a seat on the sofa and walked directly to the kitchen. " Yuzu and Karin are out in a camping trip. They'll be gone until tomorrow. Isshin's in a convention and won't be back till evening." She said from there with a voice loud enough for me to hear. I could also hear the clattering of porcelains and silvers. It didn't take long for her to come back with a tray in hand. On it was a porcelain tea set and plates with Chappy cookies and cake slices looking delish. She placed the delicacies on top of the coffee table in front of me and sat on the sofa across mine. My eyes were immediately drawn towards those pink cutesy and scrumptious looking cookies—Chappy cookies no less!
" I made them before I went get you." Kurosaki Masaki pushed the plate to my direction. " Help yourself."
" Thank you!" I said with a childish smile as I took a cookie and ate it in one go. I almost forgot about the Chappy cookies! All the reservations I was feeling earlier vanished in thin air as a look of satisfaction was painted on my face. " It's really good!"
Pleasure danced in her eyes as my hostess let out a light laugh. " I'm glad you liked it. Eat as much as you want, I have a box there for you to take home later."
It's Christmas! My head silently shouted as I took another piece to munch.
With an air of queenly grace, Masaki-san gracefully picked up her cup of tea and took a small sip before asking me. " So, Rukia-chan, how have you been?"
The ecstasy level dropped lightly as I swallowed the second piece and drank my tea. " I'm...okay." I answered with a sugary voice which was slightly tensed. " I've been well."
The lady with curly chestnut hair nodded thoughtfully as she placed her tea cup down and looked at me straight in the eyes with an indomitable gaze. " That's good to hear. Is Ichigo taking care of you?"
For a moment, I tensed and flinched with my mind blank. The question was a little stumping and confusing in a sense, given my current relationship with Ichigo—or the lack of it. Then I realized that this woman wasn't aware of what's going on between her son and me. I don't think Ichigo will tell on his mother as well. Assuming these facts, I responded as truthful as possible but without saying anything unnecessary. " Well, Ichigo and I are…" I paused, struggling for the right words to use, wondering how I'll phrase it so Masaki-san wouldn't get the wrong idea. "…we're kind of in a difficult situation right now." The answer was vague but it was the best way to phrase the description of what's going on between me and Ichigo.
Kurosaki Masaki was silent for a moment as she regarded me with intuitive eyes. " That's a little sad. Do you want me to talk to Ichigo to help sort out things between you two?"
" No!" I responded rather in a rush. Then, realizing my mistake, I covered up. " It's not really something that you should worry about Masaki-san. It's just a small dispute. It will be resolved overtime." Deep inside my mind, it was something that I desired—for everything to be resolved without anyone getting hurt. With a slight frown on my face, I admitted to myself that it was impossible. Someone was going to get hurt once everything between Ichigo and I is completely resolved. A true ending will eventually come. I just don't know if it will be a happy or a sad one.
" You can talk to me about anything, Rukia-chan." Coaxed my hostess in a very gentle manner, her eyes intently looking at me with genuine concern underneath them.
I thought for a moment before I opened my lips, trying to be careful with what I'm going to say. Then, I settled with stating things in pensive manner. " It's just that…I feel like my life had only been going in circles. No matter what I did, I still find myself where I began…like I'm not making any progress at all, no matter how much I struggle or work hard. It's like everything I did was a mistake I keep suffering on." There was bitterness in my voice as I finally became aware of the world's unfairness. People becomes happy even without trying. All I wanted was to move on, grow up and find my own happiness but then I realize that I'm always stuck in the same place I've always been—alone.
Masaki-san's eyes mellows as she looked at me with an understanding and empathizing gaze. Then she stood up and took the space next to me, her motherly warmth radiating—so pure and loving and kind. Taking my hand on hers, she stared at me straight in the eye with the softest look one could muster. " Rukia-chan…" The chestnut haired woman began with a sweet soft voice that sounded like a gentle lullaby. "…when a person is still looking straight ahead in the path she is taking and continues to walk, she is not usually aware of how far she had gone. But once everything comes to a standstill and she looks back only to find out she hadn't gone far, that person will only feel betrayed of the expectations she herself had made." Giving my hand a light squeeze and a showing a tender smile, she added. " You shouldn't rush…you should take your time and learn from both your defeats and victory. Sadness is a vital part of life—once you'll overcome your sadness and despair, only then will you experience real happiness. People who never knew sadness will never know what real joy is."
Her words struck me, like she understood the struggles I was facing despite me not telling her anything direct. Letting go of my reservations and feeling overwhelmed with different emotions that our short talk had aroused within me—those thoughts of desperation and grieving that I kept in the deepest part of my being—I embraced her in my own accord. For a moment, the act had probably surprised her but she hugged me back tightly afterwards of how a mother would hug her very own child. It was comforting and warm that tears began falling down my eyes unconsciously as my heart swelled inside my chest. Only then did I realize how burdened I was of the things that had been happening around me. Only then have I truly admitted to myself that I, after all, had only been running away, pretending that I was okay and trying to convince myself to move on. Everything piled up and not once have I taken action to resolve anything.
" Thank you." I told the hostess as I let go of her and dried the tears in my eyes.
" Feeling better now?" She asked.
I immediately nodded and showed her a grateful smile. " A lot." And it was the truth.
" If you're feeling a little down, Rukia-chan. You could always talk to Byakuya-sama. If not, then I'm always waiting for you to come and talk to me."
" Thank you very much." I suppose that it is time that I talk to my father as well.
After that talk, Masaki-san had cheered me up. She taught me how to bake my favourite Chappy cookies. It wasn't a walk in the park but in the end I managed to succeed. Now I have two boxes of cookies—the one that Masaki-san had prepared and the other one that I made. I felt extremely satisfied with myself as gazed at my own cookies with pride. Then, I looked out of the window and saw that it was already twilight. " I think I should go home. It's getting late."
Kurosaki Masaki then glanced at the wall clock in the kitchen. " Goodness! It's this late already? I had so much fun that I didn't even notice that time."
" I did too. And thank you very much." I agreed. Perhaps, I should visit more often.
" I guess I'll walk you home. It's not safe for you to go home by yourself."
" No, Masaki-san! It's too much trouble!" I reasoned. She had done so much for me today and I didn't want to disturb her further.
The woman shook her head. " No, Rukia. It's—"
" I'm home." Announced Kurosaki Ichigo as the sound of the front door closing followed. " Mom?" He called out and went to peek on the kitchen where he found me and Masaki-san. " Oh…Rukia's here?" He asked, extremely confused with his brows knitted together.
" Welcome home son." The mother cheerily greeted. " Yeah, I fetched Rukia-chan and had tea earlier. But she's going home already. It's a little late so I'll walk her home."
" I'll walk her home." Ichigo abruptly volunteered.
Clasping her hands together, Masaki-san cheered. " Really? That's great! I could start preparing for dinner earlier then!"
" There's no need for that. I could just grab a taxi or something. You don't have to go out of your way to walk me." I argued, hoping that Masaki-san would listen as well.
" No Rukia-chan. I will not allow you to go home on your own. Even taxis are a little unsafe now a days. Just let ichigo walk you home." Kurossaki Masaki stated firmly and by the look she was giving me, there was no way that I could even argue with her anymore. Despite her gentle side, she could be a little domineering as well.
Finding no other choice, I feebly conceded with her suggestion. " Okay." I glanced at Ichigo for a moment and found his staring at me so I immediately averted my gaze from him. " Uh…thank you for the cookies." I told the lady of the house.
With a satisfied nod, Masaki-san spoke. " Good. Then I'll leave her to your care Ichigo. And please carry these for Rukia-chan son." She took a plastic bag from the counter and placed the boxes of cookies inside.
Ichigo immediately came near and took the plastic bag before facing me, however he didn't regard me directly but looked down on the floor instead as he told me. " I…uh…I'll wait for you at the front door." With that, he went out of the kitchen.
Bracing myself, I heaved a deep sigh and veered my head towards Kurosaki Masaki who was looking at me with a smile. " Then, I'll take my leave now. Thank you for today." I curtly bowed down to show my gratitude and was about to walk away but stopped when the woman addressed me.
" Rukia-chan." She called out, making me look back to her. " Ichigo may commit wrong decisions but I hope you'll learn to understand and forgive him."
I blinked at her, too stunned by what she had said. I didn't even get to reply as I simply nodded my head and walked towards the front door where the ginger head was waiting for me, leaning by the door frame with the plastic bag in hand.
He looked up when he felt my presence. " Let's go?"
I nodded and he went of first. I followed him, a few steps behind. Spring was approaching but I could still feel the coldness of a March evening. The road was lit by street lamps and a car would pass by occasionally, breaking the bleak silence reigning over us. I walked with my head down, my mind full of thoughts but I couldn't pinpoint anything in particular. Thoughts flooded, gushing down that it was almost annoying. Then, for a moment I heard my name being called out. I looked up and found bright flashing lights in front of my eyes and the loud alarming horning of car. I froze, trying to process what was happening.
" RUKIA!"
Then a strong hand grabbed my arm and pulled me towards something warm. I was now out of my daze completely.
" Stupid brats! Get out of the way!" The distant shout of an angry driver driving away very fast.
" WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Came another angry voice coming from above me this time, the vibration of every words uttered I could feel against me matched by an erratic breathing and loud pumping of the heart. The sound of a thud came beside me, the plastic of cookies had been dropped on the ground as Ichigo pushed me away from him at arms-length. " ARE YOU CRAZY?! ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL YOURSELF?"
I blinked at him with confusion. " H-huh?" Then I looked down and found that we were both on the edge of the street. " I…uh…I don't know." I stammered. My heart was beating rapidly and I don't know why. " I was just walking…following you…I was thinking…then…I don't know." I admitted finally.
Ichigo was looking at me with exasperation and didn't speak for a moment. " Are you okay?" He finally asked calmly. His amber eyes were looking at me intensely with his head levelled with mind.
" Yeah." I breathed out, a little uncertain.
He let out a relieved sigh before letting go of me and picking up the plastic bag he dropped. " Let's get you home."
I nodded and started to walk home, a little shaken when I realized what had happened but more surprised when Kurosaki Ichigo was now walking beside me, taking the side near the road. We decided to pass through the park instead of going around it. We were walking through the playground when suddenly, Ichigo called out to me. " Rukia." I stopped and whipped my head back to him who had already stood his ground a few steps behind me. He had this intense look on his face as he stared at me intently with fierce amber eyes. My throat suddenly felt dry as I started to hear my heart pounding against my chest. However, his voice still drowned everything in the background. " If I tell you everything now…will you hear me out?"
For a moment, I tensed as I tried to understand if what I heard was simply part of my imagination. When I stared at Ichigo and found his very still but adamant form still gazing at me with determined amber eyes, I had second thoughts on my first impression. Thus, hesitantly I spoke, needing to clear my throat several times but still ended up with a quivering voice. " E-excuse me?" Thought I heard him pretty well, those words were the first thing that had automatically left my lips—my coherent train of thought immediately shying away.
He gave me a once over before letting out a sigh, determination in his eyes fading away as a mellow look took over it. Then he gave me a small smile. And shook his head. " Nothing. Never mind what I said. I was just rattling. Nothing more."
My face fell and was suddenly shadowed as I clenched my hands beside me that I starting feeling myself tremble.
Seeing the sudden change in my demeanor, Ichigo called out on me with a careful tone." Ru…kia?"
" Why?" I muttered underneath my breath.
" What?"
I crossed the distance between us in a split second before I tackled him down to the ground. He was lying flat on the dusty ground while I was on top of him. Our faces were levelled that I could already feel his warm breath against my cheeks. " Why?!" I asked again. He couldn't see my face as I tried to hide it from him.
" R-rukia!" There was surprise and confusion in his voice. " What are you doing?"
" Why?!" I yelled against his chest.
" Why what? What's wrong?"
My hands were placed flat on his chest. I could feel his erratic heartbeat against my palm. I clenched at fistful of his garment before looking at him with spiteful eyes. " Why are you always playing with me Ichigo?!" I asked with hate in my voice. I could feel him tense against me. " You're always making me confused! Always! You never tell me anything. You just go ahead and do whatever you want and leave me behind! How am I supposed to figure out anything if you're gonna tell me nothing?!" I roared as I clenched his garment tighter against my hand. " If you want me back, then say so! If you don't, then stop making me feel confused with the things you do!" This time, Kurosaki Ichigo relaxed beneath me as he veered his head to the side.
" I'm so sorry." He said as he enveloped me with his arms and pulled me closer to him.
" You're so selfish." I mumbled against his chest but I relished the feeling of his warmth against me.
He caressed my back gently. " I know. That's why I'm apologizing midget."
We stayed like that for a while, not moving nor speaking before I decided to break the silence between us. " So, you're still not going to tell me anything?" When he didn't respond, I pressed. " I'm going to ask you again Ichigo. Why?"
There was a pause in his part before he answered with voice sounding surreal. " Because…I need to put an end on everything that I've started."
-To God be the glory-
A/N: I'm honestly happy right now and will be happier if I hear from you so please leave a REVIEW! Even a few words of insult will do haha…I understand if you hate me now but hey, I'm human too. But I could keep that promise if you want, only you'll have to wait longer because I honestly don't know when I'll actually finish this story because my mind is still being juggled with lotsa things. Just tell me which one you prefer, the current set-up or the one I tried to propose last time. I'll obediently follow the result of the poll! :D
