Christian's POV
"Sweet girl, we need to stop now otherwise we will not make it outside and Taylor will be ringing maintenance to get us busted out of here," I manage to gasp out as I calm my breathing and she nods but those blue eyes are so deep and so enticing, I could drown in them, I rest my forehead against hers and we calm down enough for me to restart the elevator and pick her up again.
As we reach the bottom, Taylor is standing there with a concerned look until he sees us, his eyebrow lifts and he simply turns and walks to the driver's seat of the magnificent limousine he has hired for the day.
"A limo?" Ana squeaks out whipping her head to look at me.
I shrug saying "Well it will be more comfortable for you," and she concedes with a lift of her eyebrows and says no more other than to "oooh" as I sit her down and strap her in. I may have left my lifestyle behind but I like strapping her in, tight.
"Would you like champagne?" I offer her a flute and she accepts tentatively. "It's from the Krug Brut Champagne Collection 1989, I think the best things came from 1989," and she snorts quietly and I say, "We are going for a little drive and I want to give you a wonderful afternoon but you need to tell me if you become tired or sore, nothing that I have planned needs to be done today and if you forgive me, we have plenty of time to get them done. Will you promise me that you'll tell me if you are tired?" and she nods but knowing her lack of self-preservation, I will need to keep a very close eye on her.
"Well, before we go anywhere, I want you to accept this," and I present her with a big parcel and she half scowls at me, oh goodness, if she scowls at me over this, the cheapest present of them all, I am going to be in a lot of trouble.
As she opens the parcel, a huge smile crawls across her face and she turns her head and bestows a kiss on my nose. "Oh, he's so sad," she says as she stares into the bright blue eyes of the gorgeous teddy bear "What does he say?" she asks as she looks for the note around his neck and her eyes go round as I tell her to open the bauble around the teddy's neck.
She opens up the bauble and gasps as she sees what is inside "A gilded cage necklace, oh Christian.." and I think she is about to burst into tears so I wrap my arm around her shoulders.
"I heard what you said to me, I had a lot of time to think about it. There's no way I want to keep you in a cage, I want to protect you from everything and everyone that could hurt you but I understand we need to do this together, I am used to making all the decisions so you'll have to tell me when that is bothering you. I'd gladly take that responsibility because the only reason you need to worry about protection is because you are with me."
"Well actually Christian, it appears my own past seems to have a few protection issues as well, I am happy for you to make the decisions but only if you tell me what and why you are doing it, please don't implement something and have me, like a bird, hit my head against the glass because I didn't know it existed." Her whole body is radiating tension and I can see her point and so I concede.
"I will try, now have a look inside the cage, by the way, it's your teddy's necklace, not yours" and I smile at her, "Please forgive Teddy, he's a bit corny."
The note states:
I care for you and my love for you
Tempers every single thing I do
I will get it wrong, I will get it right
But please let us never ever fight
I can't bear to cause you pain
And hope you will forgive me, again.
The tears are rolling down her cheeks and I know they aren't totally happy tears because she is hugging the teddy instead of me and she's trying to control whatever strong emotion is wracking her but I am completely unprepared when she says "Oh we will fight."
I stare at her. "I have spent my life hiding, passing under the radar, hiding in the shadows, backing away from fights and giving in because it made everyone else happy.." and I am confused until she continues "I always thought I wasn't worth it, I didn't matter to anyone, it wasn't worth putting myself out there and risking the backlash….. but you… but you tell me that I am worth it, you show me that I am worth loving, that I'm worth listening to, so I will be finding my voice. Will you be able to cope with that? Will you be able to cope with an Ana that isn't meek and mild and dare I say it submissive?"
I understand what she is saying but I laugh heartily at her last question, "Oh honey, there is nothing submissive about you and I love you and your smart mouth and if you grow in confidence, it will be my greatest achievement. Baby, your light needs to shine and I will hold it as high as possible so that everyone sees it." And I don't care about my normal safety rules and I simply need to pick her up and hug her to me. "I will cope, I love you like you have no idea!" and the sad face, changes to a tentative smile as she looks deep into my eyes and as she realises it is the truth, a gorgeous shy smile appears.
"Ok, so do you accept this first apology?" I ask and she nods vigorously, "Ok then Taylor, let's go," and it's obvious that Ana had completely forgotten that Taylor was in the car as her cheeks redden. "Don't worry, there's a privacy screen, I just spoke into the microphone" and she nods and rests against my chest.
"What do you mean by first?"
I smile and tap my nose and we head out into the sunshine, the dark windows stop the paparazzo and Ana still gasps and shrinks further into me, I hope they stop following me soon; I really do want her to be able to go out without worrying about them. We cuddle until we reach our next destination and Ana's mouth settles into a calm smile as we drive onto the Bainbridge Island Ferry.
Once the ferry is underway, Ana opens the window to feel the wind in her hair, pulling out the hair band and letting it cascade around her shoulders. I could spend my time just looking at her but today is about her so I point out the views, the Seattle skyline retreating into the distance looks gorgeous on this clear day, incredible views over to Mt Rainer and the Cascades and the simple beauty of the ships and sailboats in Puget Sound make it 35 minutes of calmness that settle my nerves. It's a pity that the whales and dolphins don't come out to play but that will be something for a trip on my own boat. Ana looks so happy that I hope we will be able to leave the limo without anyone jumping out and taking a photo.
Taylor tells me that he has organised Sawyer to come over separately and secured the Bainbridge Island Beach Cottage for privacy as I requested, so I happily carry Ana out of the car and onto the porch of the beautiful classic 1930's cabin and place her into one of the rocking chairs. Ana's eyes are wide as she takes in the view which is simply picture perfect, an expansive green lawn meanders down to the waters of Pugent Sound and a private beach lies at the end with the waves lapping the shoreline.
Taylor brings a picnic basket packed to the brim with goodies from Gail and Ana's eyes light up again, she hasn't stopped smiling since we arrived and then she says "You know I forgave you last night, you don't need to keep doing extra wonderful things," and my heart swells that little bit more. To think that just over a week ago, I did not believe I had a heart at all.
After a delightful lunch where I am so glad to see Ana eating some of each of the delicacies and having seconds, I suggest that I would like to go down to the beach and she nods enthusiastically. Taylor removes the basket and returns with a blanket and I throw it over my shoulder and pick up Ana as she giggles "I could get used to this," and I'd happily comply, even with the heavy cast, she still weighs nothing.
Out on the beach, although it is a secluded spot, the wind is whipping up the waves and I wrap the blanket around us and snuggle. Ana is relaxing happily against me and I point out little areas of Seattle and points of interest and then we sit for a while quietly, Ana tucked into me, we don't need to say anything, just enjoying each other's presence and then I say, "Ok, something else to say I'm sorry," and before Ana can do anything other than look disapprovingly at me, I open a box that Taylor has managed to bring down next to us without Ana hearing him and say "Do you want to have some fun?" and she looks questioning at me. "Here let me show you," and I fire up the remote control helicopter and show Ana how to use it and she is laughing at the little antics I manage and then I pull her between my legs so that I can support her and she flies it until it is caught by a gust of wind and plummets into the sand a few feet away.
We manage to wrangle it back into the air and then Ana hands me the controller and laughs saying "Go on, I know you want to send it soaring, so here you go," and I'm glad because I have a little plan for the helicopter. With my arms around her, I loop the loop with the helicopter and have some fun and then manage a perfect landing right on her cast and she claps and giggles, god, I love that sound and I bury my nose in her hair for a second and then say "Open the door of the helicopter," and I watch as her eyebrows disappear into her hair as she spies the little red box.
"Oh Christian! OMG, I crashed the helicopter and you could have lost this when you flew out over the sea. More importantly, you shouldn't have, diamonds, rubies really! I told you, you are forgiven."
She's staring at the necklace in her hand and I say gently "Ana, the bird is on the outside of the cage, the body of the bird is a heart, I need you to understand that you hold my heart in your hands and I will never cage you, you are too beautiful a bird to cage."
And again she is crying but this time I'm sure they're happy tears as she twists and lifts her hair to allow me to place the beautiful bird motif Cartier necklace around her neck and I kiss the back of her neck as I pat it down and she grabs my head and pulls me down into a passionate embrace, I wrap the blanket closely around us to ensure nothing is visible to anyone spying and give myself over to Ana, she can do what she wants.
Eventually when we come up for air, Ana says "Christian, you know all I want is you. I don't need diamonds and rubies, I don't need teddy bears, I just want you with all your flaws, even your mistakes, mostly I want your smiles and jokes, even your sarcasm, I don't care, I just want you and to be able to share things with you, to be able to laugh with you, play music with you, just you."
I nod that I understand "But I want to give you more, I want to give you everything and then a little bit more," and I hold her tighter, my chin on her head with her hair blowing in the wind enveloping us both. I can't help but think as I look out at the view that despite its beauty, there is nothing more beautiful than the girl in my arms.
After sitting for a while longer, it occurs to me that Ana is looking tired and I decide that it's time to head home and so I wrap the blanket around her, she lays her head against my chest and she's almost asleep by the time I make it back to the car. Taylor has the door open and a questioning look but at my smile, I see the relaxation in his shoulders, I think he was as worried as I was about my apologies.
I strap Ana in and rest her body against mine and she stays asleep until we are on the ferry. I wake her so that she can see the night lights of Seattle as we ferry towards home and I know that my plan of dinner at the Space Needle will need to wait for another night and text Gail to ask her to prepare dinner, something comforting and smile at her response.
Ana's voice is dripping exhaustion as she says, "Christian, thank you so much for a wonderful day, I thought that was the most perfect afternoon that anyone has ever given me and I am not talking about my presents, they were naughty," and she pauses looking tiredly at me "but thank you," and the smile shines despite the tiredness.
"Thank you for accepting them, I haven't exhausted the gilded cage reference though, if you ever feel like I am doing that to you, I can get you a bracelet, oh and shoes." And I laugh as I think about how I was searching for the right present for Ana and came across a pair of shoes that represent a gilded cage and while pretty, I'm sure Ana wouldn't have appreciated them.
"Here, I'll show you a picture," and I bring it up on my phone and Ana giggles, I love that sound and I forget everything else when I hear it, it curls its way around my heart and helps it pump, "The bracelet was nowhere near as interesting but I wanted to give you something that you'd keep close to your heart."
"Christian, I don't need anything close to my heart when I have you in it" Ana whispers before nuzzling into my neck again and she's not getting away with hiding from me, I lift her head up and kiss the tears that are trickling down her cheeks, finally reaching her lips, so much softer because she's crying. As I move to make her more comfortable on my lap, I lift my hand and adjust her but as I do my hand slides under her top and Ana gasps and stiffens.
I know that response but I need Ana to breathe, "Gently Ana, breathe, I'm going to remove my hand and you are going to just breathe for me, slowly and steadily, no big gasps please, baby, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to touch your skin, please breathe for me." I plead with her, I don't want the same thing to happen as happened a couple of days ago and thankfully I can see her struggling to control her panic and finally she starts taking little gasping breaths. If I could breathe for her I would except I realise that I have been holding my breath too waiting for the pain to flood her features but thankfully it doesn't.
"Are we all clear Sir?" I hear from Taylor in my headpiece and I look up at him in the mirror and nod.
"Honey, we are almost off the ferry and we're going home, can you keep breathing for me, just a little deeper for me, baby?" and thankfully the panic seems to subside and she slumps against me until she is able to breathe normally.
Finally, as we disembark the ferry I have to bend to hear her whispered next words, "We were going to talk today….can we not ruin what had been a perfect day by talking please?"
"Baby, any day I have you in my arms is a perfect day and no we don't have to talk today, Mrs Jones has a beautiful meal ready for us and then I think sleep would be a good idea, we can talk any other time. And to be truthful, right at this point I don't want to talk, I don't want to think, I just want you well in my arms. Are you ok now?"
Ana's nod before she hides her face again is less than convincing but her breathing sounds normal and then in my earpiece again Taylor asks "Would you like me to call Dr Grace to come and check her over?" and I nod, hoping that he'll use his very good judgement and tell Mom to make it appear like she was just popping over for a visit and it's as if he can also read my mind because I then get "Just a visit to see how her favourite son is doing?" raising my eyebrow, I again nod and smile my thanks.
As we have fallen silent I press play on the music system and the beautiful strains of young angelic female voices fill the car causing Ana to sit straighter and say in surprise "What are we listening to?"
"Do you like it?" I ask
"Oh Christian, it's beautiful, what is it"
"It's the Flower Duet by Delibes, from the opera Lakmé."
We listen for a bit then Ana says, "Can we play some music together tonight? That might be a nice way to finish off the day." And I couldn't think of a better suggestion. "I know you don't only listen to classical music because of what you loaded on my iPad but what do you like? Rather than what you thought I might like or you wanted me to hear," she finishes cheekily grinning up at me.
"Hey, I thought you'd want to hear those songs, if I could have found some more songs professing my love to you before I even knew it myself, I would have added them too," and I am rewarded by her giggle and a nudge.
"I'll have you know that my taste in music is eclectic, Anastasia. Everything from Thomas Tallis to the Kings of Leon, it just depends on my mood and what I am doing. What about you? I know you like Keith Urban but what else?" We still don't know so much about each other and she mirrors my thoughts.
"We really know so little about each other except that we freak each other out by touching each other's skin don't we?" Ana says sadly.
All I can think is "Please don't go there now."
And she shakes her head as though with the same thought and continues "I'm a classic rock and roll girl or I like country music if I am going to be playing it otherwise I'll listen to anything. We'll have to compare iPods but I'd say yours is stuffier," she says outright laughing at me.
Taylor pulls up at the elevator just as she says that, leaving me no time to retort so I kiss her on the forehead and then the tip of her nose and she buries her face in my shirt as we head for the elevator. I am sure that we both remember the trip down and I smirk as I ask her to press the buttons and enter the code.
As the door closes despite my best intentions, the electricity is there again and I hug her closer to stop my hands from moving and changing our position and she does something instead. She nuzzles against my neck, giggles and then licks my chin and as I look down in surprise she kisses me fair on the lips and I groan, "Ana we can't," but deepen it anyway, forcing my tongue in between her lips and taking what I can for the short trip up. As the elevator pings I swing us around so my back is facing the door and disconnect and place a gentle kiss on Ana's lips which belies the heat of a second before. I leave the blanket draped covering any offending view of my body and its reaction to Ana's cheekiness. I smile as I ask, "What have I started ?"
