Olivia frowned, focusing on the cell phone she cradled in her hand. She flipped it open and then, just as quickly, snapped it closed again. It would be so simple to press that button and hear Alex's voice in her ear. It had been days, almost a week since she had watched Alex's sedan disappear into traffic and leave her behind. Her heart begged her thumb to move. Her pride made her doubt whether she was truly ready.
The week had been an eye opening one for Olivia. Without the buffer of Alex's love and protectiveness to safeguard her, she had found that the world grated harshly on her still-sore emotions. There were moments when she felt a sense of absolute confidence. She felt that she could be the woman she had been and that the pieces of her life were on the way to being put together. Like a nearly finished puzzle, Olivia felt she could finally glimpse the sought-after picture. And then, in an instant, a breath, a touch, it was shattered again and she could not recall even a hint of what the picture was intended to be. She hated to admit that, like a puzzle, the time she spent in pieces far outweighed the time she spent feeling whole. She wondered whether Alex's sheltering presence would help her grow or if it would smother her altogether.
Pressing her thumb over the stream of cold water, Alex sprinkled the shrubs at the back of the flower bed with a wide mist. A stiff breeze blew clouds of the smallest droplets back towards her, dampening her skin and wetting her clothes. She didn't move away. The air, despite the breeze and the trajectory of the sun towards the horizon, was still uncomfortably warm and the water was refreshing. A little gust blew stray strands of her hair back from her face and, on its back, brought the barest echo of ringing. Familiar ringing. Her cell phone. Olivia.
Flinging the forgotten hose to the dirt, Alex sprinted towards the porch. She burst inside and swept sloppily to the little hearthroom where she spent so much time reading and listening for her cell to ring. Leave it to Olivia to finally call when she had left the phone behind. She barked her shin sharply against the corner of the coffee table and, jamming the phone to her ear, gasped her hello with the vehemence of a painful oath. "Hello? Olivia?" Damn, she sounded desperate and a little crazy. She inhaled through her teeth and willed her heart to stop pounding.
A little bell jangled above her head as Olivia slipped into the diner and scanned overtop of patrons' heads to find a familiar face. Her eyes met blue ones and she smiled, weaving her way between booths and waitresses to a table up against the window. She slid into the vinyl booth. "Hi, El."
"Hey," he replied, pushing a menu across the well-worn Formica to his partner. "Care to take a glance? My treat."
She shook her head and, as a waitress appeared, gestured for a cup of coffee. "I'm not hungry. I just wanted some company."
Elliot snorted. "I call bullshit, Liv. Since I'm paying, I say you're eating." He grinned at the waitress and, without cracking the menu, ordered for both of them. "Besides, I'm in the mood to celebrate. Kathy's at her book club, my in-laws are sitting and I've been given permission to eat as much bacon as I want." Olivia rolled her eyes and held her mug to her lips, inhaling the aromatic steam for a long moment before taking a sip. This grungy diner had been a favorite haunt of hers and Elliot's for years and she had grown to take comfort in the booths that were always sticky, the coffee that was always weak and the waitresses who, despite their perky uniforms, always managed to project irritable airs. She loved it. Besides, they served breakfast all day and all night. She had lost count of the number of poached eggs she had gulped down in the dead of night in this very booth.
Elliot sucked down half of his mug and beckoned for a refill. He always did make the waitresses work for their tips. He settled his elbows on the table. "So, how are you doing?" His tone was congenial but he didn't fool Olivia. They had spent too much time together in this fluorescent, greasy hole-in-the-wall.
"Really? Small talk? Why don't you just ask what you've been wanting to ask, El?"
"Ok, fine. Have you called Alex?"
"No. How many times did you call Kathy when she went to stay with her parents?"
"Apples and oranges, Liv. I didn't ask her to leave. You need to call her. She's worried." Olivia's eyes slid sideways to focus on a knick in the linoleum-tiled floor. Looking away made it easier to speak.
"You've been talking to her? Is she okay?"
"She called me. She's fine. Upset. Worried about what you'll do if she pushes you. You didn't exactly make yourself very clear, Liv. She doesn't know what to think."
Olivia hunched her shoulders a little, as if she was being scolded like a naughty child. She knew that that wasn't Elliot's intent but she felt guilty anyway. "I've been meaning to. I will."
"Good." Elliot leaned back as their surly waitress reappeared, her stout arms heavily laden with enormous ceramic plates. She plunked them down one by one, grunting the identity of each dish as if each had personally insulted her. Elliot smiled ingratiatingly and politely requested yet more coffee before attacking the little dish of butter with his knife and beginning to slather his pancakes with gusto. Olivia stared at him with amusement. He shoveled a comically large slab of pancake into his mouth and spoke as he chewed. "If you don't, I'll kick your ass. She's running up my long-distance bill." She laughed and he washed the sweet mouthful down with a scalding sip of coffee. "Seriously, you've had your Olivia-time. You need to call her before you lose her. Now, eat up before it gets cold. You know I don't offer to pay often. Take advantage."
Olivia unfurled her cutlery and looked down at the waffle and poached eggs Elliot had ordered for her. She drizzled the syrup over the fragrant waffle and cut a small bite. She really wasn't hungry and Elliot's characteristic food-shoveling wasn't helping but she decided to humor her partner. She knew that, if she didn't at least eat a little, he'd just keep jabbing at her. She ate the bite. It was sweet and hot and tender and delicious. Her stomach growled in appreciation and suddenly she was ravenous. It occurred to her that she had been eating far too little in the last few days. Now, she wanted to eat everything in sight. Popping another bite into her mouth, she reached across the table and snapped up a slice of Elliot's bacon. Usually he would slap her away but today she knew he'd let her have her way and she took advantage as he had urged. He was paying. He could always order more. He snickered and she crunched the greasy treat. The pieces were falling into place once more and the picture looked lovely.
Alex went to her room early that night, abandoning her parents to their after-dinner drinks on the porch. She had been poor company all evening, in a sour mood ever since she had sprinted for her cell phone and left the lawn to turn into a muddy morass. It had been a junk call and all she had to show for it was a deep purple bruise on her shin. She had been so excited to hear that phone ring and now she couldn't seem to snap herself out of her depressed snit. Well, if she couldn't be pleasant then she'd take her book to bed and fall asleep between pages.
She changed slowly, grumbling to herself as she performed her ablutions. Bed wasn't really wanted to be. Not this bed, at least. She wished that Olivia was waiting for her in bed, talking to her through the bathroom door as she tended to do. Instead, the faucet was the only sound that reached her ears and her bed was empty and cold. She dried her face and switched on the lamp. The book held little interest for her but it was too early for sleep and she had no wish for company. She slid between the sheets. She reached for her book but her phone buzzed and her hand changed course. Taught a lesson by her sore shin, she took a second to check the caller id before answering. Her heart leapt. This was no junk call. She pressed the phone to her ear and her smile was bright and irrepressible. "Hi, Liv."
Her girlfriend's voice was soft but steady. She sounded stronger than she had when they had last spoken. Alex bit her tongue to stifle the rush of questions fluttering at the back of her throat. Olivia needed to be in control of this. Alex would grant her that. "How are you?"
Alex wanted to blurt out her answer but she paced herself carefully. She was roiling with homesickness and loss. She didn't want to scare Olivia with the intensity of her feelings. She didn't want to put pressure on her. "I'm okay. I've been spending a lot of time with my parents. It's been nice." She fell silent and waited for Olivia to make the next step.
The line seemed to go dead. Alex held her breath, wondering if the call had been dropped or if Olivia had hung up. She prayed otherwise. She was on the verge of calling for her girlfriend when she heard quiet words that made her heart skip and then thump wildly.
"Are you… Would you like to come home?" Alex pressed her lips tight together, breathing through the burst of joyful tears that stung her eyes. Olivia had asked her to come home. Not to her apartment, not to New York, but home. Such a simple word for such an immense, emotional concept. Yes, she wanted to come back to Olivia. Yes, she wanted to come home.
