Chapter 44

It was many days later that Scarlett saw Rhett. He had gone away on a country trip on some business deal. The details were vague and there was no definite date when he might return. But he did return and when he bounded up the stairs, Scarlett was feeling well enough to take a seat on the large outdoor veranda and have her breakfast. Scarlett felt angry for being neglected for so long and when she looked up, she half-expected him to greet her with a casual "hello" again. But something of the dramatic lens with which she used to view the world before was fading and the world which was either black or white, was starting to appear in shades of gray.

Rhett - the wolfish grin, the pirate who was looking for a maid to ravage, the heroic blockade runner, the despicable cad - all these colorful phrases seemed silly to her now. Why, he was merely a muscular version of a Charleston gentleman. He looked brown and coarse because he had travelled so much and he was the captain of a ship. Naturally he has to appear strong, confident and brave. But for the first time, she saw him clearly as he was.

Somewhere during their conversation across the breakfast table, she dropped the letter she had been reading from Ashley and questioned,

"Rhett, during all those times we spent together, did you ever tell me how I made you feel? Did you ever share what you enjoyed most of the times we shared?"

"Why talk of those days, Scarlett?" replied Rhett, curious but puzzled.

"You are doing it again!" snapped Scarlett, her eyes flashing and snapping in anger. "Not one word of how I pulled through in the past week. Or even details of where you went! If this is what love is supposed to be, then-"

"You can always go back to Atlanta" said Rhett, suavely.

A wave of shock ran through Scarlett. He hadn't changed at all. He was still somehow hostile to her. Swallowing her fury, she replied, "From now on, you cannot tell me what to do, Rhett. I will decide for myself." She continued in a softer tone. "I always imagined, a man in love to be more honest, humble and kind. You aren't any of these things."

She gazed at him squarely. "I have decided to go back to Atlanta. But its only because of Wade. He is finding things difficult at the school where I put him. Ashley writes to warn me that there might be some kind of trouble brewing between the people managing the school and the boys studying there. I've written to Wade, asking him to come to Aunt Pitty's for a spell. What you said about taking responsibilities.. you're right. I'm not fond of it. I feel trapped. Just how I felt when Dr. Meade saddled me with Melly and her new baby. Now that you know, don't despise me for it because you are the same. Whatever weaknesses you find in me, are also in you, but you have disguised it well."

"When are you leaving?"

"In two days."

Scarlett stood up to go to her room. Then she turned and walked to Rhett. She laid a hand on his shoulder and looked into his black eyes. "Even if you aren't as romantic as I thought you would be and you would probably be running away to various places on business trips, in a way, you opened my eyes to myself and for that I am grateful." Scarlett's voice shook lightly as she concluded, "- and I'm not afraid of you anymore-"

Rhett grasped her hand in his warm hands and kissed it. The look between them showed that for the first time, they were on the same level.