Dipper, Mabel, and I get out of the car, after breaking in, and make our way to the large gates, figuring out a way in. Mabel stays behind as my brother and I investigate. "Hey! I think I found a way in!" Dipper beckons me over, and soon Mabel jogs over as well.
"Great let's hurry up!" I say, ducking under a wooden board to pass the fence.
After sneaking up to the paying stand, we grab a few clubs and golf balls then make our way to start practicing at the first hole. "Alright, first hole, easy peasy." I let my sister take first shot.
"And a one and a two and a- hup!" She hits the ball and it goes straight forward, clinking into a few walls before landing in the hole, placing a hole in one.
"Nice! My turn!" I end up taking five turns to get a hole. 'Typical...'
~~Time Skip brought to you by: Getting chased by Scott Farkus! #JustWatchedAChristmasStory~~
Finally at hole eighteen, the windmill, Mabel's worst enemy, or however you would like to call it, she putts the ball and it fails to go in the hole, but instead winds up with a whole pile of other golf balls. "Darn! Poop heck darn!" she finally cries after many attempts.
Dipper rolls his eyes and leans up against the windmill. "Ugh, I don't get it! What is wrong with this hole?" I raise an eyebrow at his actions, as does Mabel. He gasps and backs up quickly, "Did you hear that?"
"What, the sound of your dignity depleting?"
"Macie!" Mabel scolds, then looks back at Dipper, "What? What is it?"
He whispers to us, "Grab your clubs."
"Already in our hands." I hold mine up and he just rolls his eyes, readying his as Mabel does the same. We slowly inch our way to the small opening, Dipper grabs it and rips it off and we get ready to smack some people, err, golf ball people?
Staring at the little people for a few seconds, the twins grasp the situation as they scream in terror, as do the Lilliputtians. I join in, as to not stand out like I knew about this. After another minute of screaming, we all share a look and lower our weapons, the Lilliputtians cease their screams as well. Franz steps up, clearing his throat, "We good? We good? All right then! Hi, hello. I'm Franz, and welcome to our home!"
"A windmill isn't much of a home..." I mumble and get a punch from the girl next to me.
"What is this?" Dipper awe's.
"Yeah! Are you guys tiny humans, or enormous mini-humans?" Mabel asks, as much in a shock as Dipper is at the moment.
"What in the world would be a mini-human?!" I cry, utterly confused at this whole conversation.
"Shh!" They both shush me, so I just cross my arms and pout.
Franz chuckles, "Neither. We're Lilliputtians! Lilli- Lilliputt... the name makes more sense written down than spoken. And we control the balls! Behold!" He gestures to the whole contraption that controls the ball's movements.
Mabel gapes at the outstanding machinery, "That's incredible!"
"With no point in it at all."
"And so needlessly complicated!" Dipper takes what I said and made it smarter sounding.
"Really? You're gonna do that?" I eye the boy and he only smiles and shrugs innocently.
The small blue golf ball man blushes and waves us off, "Aw shucks. It's only our life-long passion. Would you like us to elaborate through song?"
"Oh gosh no." I take a step back as the other Lilliputtians start to gather and take deep breaths. Luckily, Dipper and Mabel thought the same.
"Eh, we're good." Saying that, Dipper causes the the little people to disperse and grumble.
"So what are you hugelings doing here anyway?" 'Should I take offense to that? Eh.' Franz asks , an eyebrow furrowed.
'Why do these guys creep me out so much in person?'
Mabel suddenly looks ominous as she answers, "We kind of have to play this golf tournament against my rival, Pacifica."
"Oh, we know all about rivals," Franz says darkly. 'This conversation is getting boring...'
Then cue the pirate golf balls as they start bad-mouthing these guys, then the French golf balls join in and it's all just a big hodge-podge of little talking balls. The only thing I understood from the French guy was "Au revoir" which means goodbye, and I only know that from the class I was taking before all this happened...
Then, all of the mini, but big-headed, people jump down from their homes and start attacking with little pencils, which would be pretty adorable if they weren't scraping my ankles every few seconds. I feel a weight weighing me down from my left shoulder and see Dipper leaning on me for support while laughing, "These guys are a riot!"
Mabel struggles with her laughter as well, "Guys, guys, calm down! Your fighting is inadvertently adorable!" 'I should have just waited in the car and read.'
Franz crawls up, all battered and bruised, "Adorable we are, hugeling, but our tale, less so. Every hole in the park thinks they're superior, from the cowboys in the east to the grimy miners of the south. If only there was some way to decide which side is best, with... maybe... an award, or, like a trophy, I dunno."
"Or- OR! Hang on guys, hear me out," I pause and almost laugh with all the little faces staring me down with baited breaths, "OR, you can all go do what you were born for and shut up about this whole feud. Hashtag just a thought." I shrug my shoulders with my hands up.
Everyone, including the twins, gives me a non-amused look. They then shake their heads and go back to the matter at hand. 'SERIOUSLY!?' "The sticker. That sticker could decide!" Franz points to the sticker on Mabel's sweater.
"It does say 'Ze best' on it!" a french ball points out.
The head knight of the medieval hole steps forward and kneels to my sister, "Decide for us, hugeling! Choose which mini-kingdom to give a sticker to, and end our war!"
I whisper to her privately in her ear, "Pst, Mabel, don't do it." She snickers and shoves me aside, then addressing the little guys.
"Uh, I don't know, guys. I'm not sure I wanna get involved in your weird mini-blood feud." Mabel rubs her neck. Dipper pulls her aside, whispering into her ear the same way I did.
"Pst! Mabel! This is perfect! These guys control the course! Just tell them you'll give the sticker to whichever group does a better job of helping us win!"
"Oi! That's ultra, mega, cheating. Not even I would do that!" I scold him for even suggesting the idea.
"M-Macie's right, Dipper, I wanna beat Pacifica, but doesn't this seem like... super wrong?"
'Hah! Changed the script! ...I really need other ways to amuse myself...'
"Pacifica's rich, guys. She's cheating at life," Dipper explains.
"While that is true, it doesn't make cheating any less wrong and you know it!" I point him out as he takes a step back in defense.
"Hmm..." Mabel ponders. I give her a flabbergasted look.
"Wha- you can't seriously be considering this?!" I shake her but she doesn't respond, too lost in thought.
~~Time Skip brought to you by: "We control the balls! From Birmingham to Montreal, we control the balls! Our lives are filled with nonstop fun! Well there's nothing like a hole in one!" ~~
Mabel ended up taking Dipper's suggestion. The twins and the golf balls make a game plan as Mabel gets ready to play. "People of the eighteen holes! We're going to have a game of mini-golf! And whoever does the best job helping me win, gets the sticker!" Mabel announces, holding up said sticker. Franz and the pirate captain throw insults at each other again before Mabel shoots them down, "Just remember, as long as you're helping me, no fighting."
They all smile and nod in agreement, getting to their places.
I cross my arms, "You guys do realize that this cheating isn't going to end well, right?"
"Nah, it'll be fine Macie~!" Mabel giggles then gasps, "Dipper! Let's wait in the dark and flash the lights on us when Pacifica walks in!"
"Good idea! Hang on." The boy runs off. 'Ugh.' I pull up my phone, wincing from the brightness, and checking the time. 'Not too late, whatever, let's just finish this episode...I'm hungry...'
"Macie! Come on over here and stand with us!" Mabel hushingly(?) beckons me, forcing me from my thoughts.
"Okay, okay, I'm comin'," I grumble as I make my way and finally stop to the right of the girl. I get shoved in between my two siblings by the tallest one, grumbling some more as she giggles.
A door creaks open, indicating Pacifica and her trainer's arrival. Steps are heard before a puff of air gets huffed out, "How much you wanna bet they're no-shows?"
Before I can open my mouth to speak, a succession of lights flash on, revealing us to the rival, and also blinding me. "Looking for someone?" Mabel smirks as I face-palm.
Pacifica looks to the side, "Waiting in the dark, not creepy at all. Seriously though, I don't know why you bothered to come. Unless you've got something up your sleeve." She checks her nails out.
I raise my hand up high, the other one shielding my poor eyes from the lights, "I agree whole-heartedly." It falls on deaf ears. 'Oh bother...' I pout.
"Oh, I guess you could say we've got a little something, right, right?" Mabel teases and a little golf ball pokes his head out from her sleeve, causing her and Dipper to panic, hide him, then laugh awkwardly while rubbing their necks innocently. 'Swines...' I take a seat on a bench.
Sergei announces the rules and the girls have at it.
~~Time Skip brought to you by: "Ha, ha! Miner hole. I wonder what cute, silly things are going on down there." Little does Dipper know that Big Henry sacrificed himself for the greater good, and they still didn't win the sticker!~~
Us triplets sit on a bench, waiting for Pacifica to come back from getting her soda, or getting kidnapped, whichever you prefer. "I can't wait to see the look on Pacifica's face when we win. I'm thinking it'll be like 'ugh'." Dipper makes my favorite face in the series and even with my somber mood, I couldn't help but bust a gut. "Heh. You know how she does that, 'ugh'!"
"Yes, I do, oh my gosh, please don't ever stop making that face." I lean down, clutching my stomach as Dipper laughs with me.
Mabel, who has been uncharacteristically quiet, speaks up, "Dipper, is it bad that I feel good about her feeling bad?"
The boy waves her off, "Ah, just enjoy your victory, Mabel. Trust me, Pacifica will be fine."
"Hah! Yeah, what if the balls plotted to kill her to earn Mabel's favor?" 'Am I risking it? Yes. Am I having fun? Yes. Do I care anymore? Not really, so leave me alone!'
"Hah! That's great," Dipper laughs with my absurd idea, "Oh and what if they had her tied up somewhere!" 'Heh, little does he know...'
On cue, a shrill scream echoes out in the park, lights turn on to reveal Pacifica tied up on the windmill. "What's going on here? Let me go!" she demands. 'I'd like to see you buy your way out of this one!'
I chortle as the twins scream in terror. Mabel runs to go help as Dipper gives me a look, pointing to my face, "We will be talking about THIS later!" and he runs off to help as well.
"Pfft, whatever," I laugh and jog up to give my assistance.
"Let me go, you creeps!" Pacifica shakes her head back and forth, struggling against her restraints.
Franz smiles, "Welcome triplets, welcome! I can tell you're loving this, right, right? No?"
My female triplet shakes her head worryingly, "What are you guys doing?"
My male triplet argues angrily, "This wasn't part of the deal, tiny Dutchman!" pointing at his little golf head.
Pumping his hands, Franz tries to explain and calm us down, "Okay, so we saw you were favoring the miners, and we figured, what's better than beating Pacifica?" he blows a raspberry, "Killing her, right?"
Before anyone could retort, I throw in what I think, "We were favoring the miners because one of them died to get Mabel a hole in one!"
"Yeah!" Dipper agrees, then looks at me all confused, "Wait, how do you know that?"
I smile and rub the back of my neck, "Uh, I was chatting with one of the miner balls, said one of them sacrificed themselves for the greater good. I say we give them the sticker but maybe that's just me..." I go off rambling.
"Yeah sure, but we oughta win this way! So how about it, hugeling? Who's da best now?" he asks Mabel, pointing to her sticker.
"Not so fast land lubbers!" A voice gains our attention and the pirates reveal that they have captured Sergei on their pirate ship, "If you're going to play dirty, so are we. Now give us the sticker, or he walks the plank!"
"Bet!" I shout to them, earning a punch from my brother. "What? The water is like, two inches? He can't drown."
"True, but don't tempt them," Dipper replies. I nod okay.
"ENOUGH!" I startle from Mabel's sudden outburst. "No one gets the sticker!" She swipes both hands across the air. Surrounding Lilliputtians throw out a bunch of 'Boo's'. "No, no. Nuh-uh. No booing- stop, no! No one gets the sticker cuz you're all being jerks! I mean, why can't you all just get along?"
"Because we hate each other," a voice blatantly states.
"That's kind of how rivalry works, lass," the captain states as well.
Un-furrowing her eyebrows, Mabel confesses, "Well then, maybe... maybe rivalries are dumb. Maybe you don't settle them with petty competitions. Maybe the only way to be 'da best' is by ending the fighting and working together!" Ripping the sticker off her chest, she crumples it up and eats it angrily.
'Okay, how do you just up and eat a sticker like that?!'
Gasping, the golf balls converse and mumble together, then come up with a resolution, "It's all so clear-"
"-If we work together-"
"-Then we can cut open her belly and get the sticker!" They cheer and rush forward.
"Get ze girl! Slice her open!" a French Lilliputtian cries.
Mabel starts backing up, as Dipper and I look on in worry. "Uh, you guys aren't appreciating the lesson here!"
I back up from the mini people as well, not knowing where I was going and accidentally knocking into the windmill, inadvertently pushing the lever and activating Pacifica's slow demise. 'Whoops.' I look at her face which shows extreme fear. I duck down to start untying her when she shrieks, loudly. I recoil in pain and my ear drums ring with a high pitched noise. "Well, I tried, I'm out." I get up and join back with Dipper. Pacifica screams louder and demands for me to come back.
"We have to get out of here!" Dipper shouts to Mabel and pulls my arm.
"I have to save Pacifica first!" Mabel climbs a lamp post and amazingly makes her way to where the girl is held captive, untying her. Dipper's and my attention gets caught by Sergei, however, and he cries for help.
"Ah, Mister Dipper!" He teeters on the edge of the plank.
"What am I, chopped liver?" Another punch from my sibling. "Ow..." I rub my now tender shoulder from all the abuse it's been getting.
Cupping his hands, Dipper tries to ease the man's worries, "Don't freak out, man! The water's shallow! There's literally no way to drown!"
*Splash*
The stupid trainer falls face first and is not moving, causing me and Dipper to roll our eyes and say, "Seriously?"
"Quick, grab him and I'll pull up a golf cart!" Dipper commands but I stop him by grabbing his shirt.
"Wait! Maybe I want to pull up the cart."
"Macie! We have no time for this, go get Sergei!" He points and runs off before I can complain anymore.
"Ughhhhh, fine!" I slump over there and reluctantly step into the shallow water, lifting the man so he isn't submerged.
"Okay, get in!" Dipper is back with the car, so I drag the trainer in, who is now conscious but disorientated.
"Go go go!" I point to direct him to Mabel and her rival, putting golf balls everywhere. "Get on! I shout to the girls and they hastily join us.
Mabel yells, "Gun it!" and Dipper steps on the gas pedal. The golf cart heads for the exit. The knights cut a string, releasing a pair of swinging axes in front of the gate. Dipper hits the gas and we zoom through. We then go around a loop-de-loop, making me a tad nauseous, and Sergei falls off.
"Sergei overboard!" I snort and cover my mouth. 'Loved this part!'
"I'll get a new one," Pacifica says and I almost snort again.
"They're shutting us in!" Dipper warns as he presses harder on the gas. Lilliputtians poke holes through the cart. Mabel climbs on the roof as I freak out. 'I wanna go up there!'
"Wait for me!" I climb up as well, Franz is up there, as he starts taunting my sister.
"Don't even think about it. You call yourself a golfer? Without us, that club is useless in your hands!" The small man smiles evilly.
Mabel smirks as do I, knowing where this is going, "Oh yeah? What's ten minus six?"
"Ten minu- what- hang on..." While Franz struggles, I wait with anticipation for Mabel to putt him, but instead, she leans over and whispers to me.
"Wanna do the honors?" she grins.
"YES!" 'I can't believe she asked me to do it!' I stand up, taking her club and shouting, "FORE!" He launches into a volcano.
After getting over the fence, the balls throw some slurs and mini pencils as Pacifica threatens them, while I sit down to catch my breath. Stan finally pulls up so Dipper and I get in, relaxing in the comfort of the seats on each other's shoulders. Mabel goes to crawl in when it starts to rain, so she looks to us to see if we should invite the rich girl. Dipper nods his head as I give a thumbs up and a lop-sided grin.
Her braces show as she smiles brightly when Pacifica accepts her offer to take her home. It's a little more cramped, Dipper and I have to share a seat belt, with four kids instead of three.
I fall asleep on Dipper before we can reach Pacifica's mansion.
Okay, I'mma be honest and this was the worst chapter for me to write. I was so stumped and I just feel like it's an awful chapter. Let me know how you thought of it! Enjoy! Love you guys!
