This is a short chapter (sorry!) because I want the date to be on its own... I have plans :-)
I'm sorry it's taking me so long between updates. I'm approximately 27 months pregnant now (due mid-January), and it's actually quite hard to find a comfortable position with my laptop with this belly in the way. That, and I've been nesting and doing baby stuff. But I still have things planned for this story and for Redemption (which got a new chapter earlier in the week). So don't give up on me yet!
Disclaimers: I don't own 'em.
Olivia woke up the next morning with a crick in her neck from the couch throw pillows they had slept on, and Alex in her arms, half on top of her, making small noises in her sleep.
"Liv. Liv," Alex moaned softly.
"I'm right here, baby," Olivia whispered, rubbing her back and kissing the top of her head. "Right here."
Alex opened her eyes a few minutes later, and looked around.
"Hey," Olivia said softly, brushing the back of her hand against Alex's cheek. "Feeling better this morning?"
Alex nodded. "Liv, I…"
"Alex…" Olivia stopped to let Alex speak, but Alex looked at her expectantly. "I'm glad you didn't leave. I was so worried about you last night."
"I thought about it," Alex admitted. "I called Liz to ask if I could stay with her. But she didn't answer her phone, and when she called back, I had just finished destroying your pillows. She suggested that you might freak out if you came home and there was a mess and I was gone, but that she would come get me after you got home if I still wanted her to. And then I calmed down a bit and realized that you were right. I'm not angry with you, and I don't know what I'd be doing without you. I'm taking my frustration out on you partly because I know you'll take it and be so damn understanding."
"Sweetie, I knew you were angry and that you needed to let it out. It's normal to be angry; God knows you've got plenty to be angry about. And I'd much rather have you take it out on me, or even on my poor, innocent pillows, than on yourself." Olivia rubbed Alex's back with one hand and simultaneously massaged her scalp with the other. "Are we okay, though?"
Alex looked into Olivia's eyes and nodded. "We're okay."
Olivia kissed her forehead. "Good. Does that mean I can still take you on our first date tonight?"
"I wouldn't miss it. Where are we going?"
Olivia chuckled. "I'm not giving it up that easily. The only thing I'll tell you is that it's definitely casual, and you need to wear comfortable shoes. We'll be doing some walking."
"Okay. I'll change after lunch with my father. And I'll pick up some new pillows."
"Good luck. Hopefully Elliot and I will just be doing paperwork all day, so give me a call or drop by if you need me, okay?"
—
Olivia looked at the clock for approximately the gazillionth time since she'd arrived. 1:30. She sighed and pulled out the next file in her stack. She'd already called to confirm the dinner reservations and gone over the evening's itinerary in her mind.
She tapped her foot nervously on her desk.
"Hey," Elliot called out, throwing a crumpled up piece of paper at her. "You look distracted. Want to go grab a cup of coffee?"
Olivia nodded and pushed up from her chair.
"So, how's Alex doing?" Elliot asked as they walked down the steps in front of the precinct.
"Better," Olivia replied. "She's getting there."
"That's good. Any word on her apartment and when she'll be able to move back in?"
Olivia shook her head. "I haven't asked. But it's not like I'm in a rush to get rid of her. I kind of like having her there."
"Liv, I told you to be careful…"
"Yeah, I know, El, but I care about her, alright?"
Elliot opened and closed his mouth a few times, then grabbed his coffee and took a sip.
"Are you two…"
"I'm taking her out on a date tonight. Our first date."
"Oh. I was under the impression it was already serious."
"It is serious, El. She just hasn't been up for going out on dates yet."
"And you're sure all of this isn't because she's relying on you and you're enjoying taking care of her?"
"You're an ass, Elliot." Olivia snapped. "Of course not. I've cared about her for a long time. I just didn't know she felt the same way until recently. Neither did she."
"So that's it, then?"
"El, how did you know that you were going to marry Kathy?"
Elliot looked into his coffee cup and thought for a moment. "I think i'd have to say it was the first time I kissed her."
Olivia raised an eyebrow.
"You two are already making out?"
"Elliot, that's none of your business. But yeah, we've kissed, and it feels… different. Right, I guess," she said softly.
Elliot nodded, looking off into space. "I don't know, Liv. It's my job to watch your back, and I think this is a bad idea. You're going to get hurt."
"Yeah, El, your job is to watch my back. Not my heart." She smiled at him and stood up, throwing her coffee cup in the trash, and walked quickly back to the precinct, with Elliot rushing to keep up.
—
Alex tapped her foot nervously as she waited at the table in the small upscale restaurant her father had chosen, facing the door as always. She sipped a glass of wine nervously, figuring it might help her to relax before he arrived, just in case he wasn't as conciliatory as her brother had led her to believe.
She pressed her lips together as she saw him headed towards the back of the restaurant, and stood up to greet him.
"Alexandra," he said warmly, enveloping her in a bear hug. He didn't seem to notice that she flinched slightly at the use of her full name. "It's good to see you."
"Daddy," she said, hugging him back. "It's good to see you, too."
He motioned for her to sit down, and ordered a drink.
"Alexandra, I…" he studied his daughter for a moment and tried to find words as she swirled her wine glass, avoiding eye contact. He swallowed and settled on, "Liz called me."
"Oh," Alex said. She smoothed the napkin in her lap and folded her hands, resting her wrists on the edge of the table.
The elder Cabot looked intently at his place setting and straightened out his silverware, then swallowed a sip of his drink and looked up at her again, reaching over to take her hand. "I didn't want to believe it," he said quietly. "You know how long we've known that family for. I didn't think it was possible. I wanted to believe it was all a misunderstanding. I'm sorry."
Alex took a steadying breath and looked up at her father. "If there's one thing I've learned in my job, it's that anyone can be a rapist. And anyone can be a victim." She laughed uncomfortably. "What did Liz tell you?"
"She reamed me out for not supporting my daughter. And she was right. I should never have tried to be neutral."
Alex nodded and used her free hand to straighten her own silverware. "He was uh, pretty controlling and abusive even before the rape. It started slowly, but this wasn't an isolated incident." She withdrew her hand from her father's as the waiter placed their appetizers on the table, and tilted her head. "You still haven't said whether you believe me now."
"I don't think you're a liar, Alexandra. I just went from being thrilled that my daughter was alive and engaged to marry the son of one of my oldest friends to shocked that he could do such a terrible thing. I wanted to stay out of it, but that doesn't mean I didn't think you were telling the truth about him hurting you."
"That's not what it felt like," Alex said quietly, looking at her lap. "It felt like my dad was defending my rapist."
"I just thought you'd want me to give you space while you were sorting things out. I didn't mean for you to interpret it that way." He stopped eating and waited for her to make eye contact. "Forgive me, Alexandra."
Alex nodded slightly as a single tear rolled down her cheek. "I spent three years away from home with no identity and no family, Daddy. I want to be able to count on my family. I want to know my father supports me. But this felt like a betrayal. It's going to take time for me to forgive you, but I will."
The elder Cabot placed his knife and fork on the side of his plate to indicate he had finished eating. "I understand. But I hope you know how glad I am that my little girl is back."
Alex pressed her lips together and tried to force a smile. "I'm glad to be back too, Daddy."
They ordered coffee and dessert and talked about random topics. "You're moving back into your old apartment soon?"
Alex nodded. "My tenants are moving out June 15, so I'll be back in there by the beginning of July. I'll have to go up to Amherst to get some of my furniture, and buy some new things. Then maybe Bill and I can start talking about selling Mom's house."
"Your friend has been very kind to let you stay with her for so long. I'm surprised you didn't end up going to stay at a hotel."
Alex nodded and looked away. "Olivia has been very generous," she agreed. She took a few breaths, trying to decide how best to tell him. This was clearly her opening. "Daddy, there's something I need to tell you about her and I'm not sure how you're going to react."
Mr. Cabot smiled and patted Alex's hand. "I know she was there when you were shot and helped save your life, and I know she's been a good friend to you since the whole Robert fiasco. I'm not sure what you could tell me about her that I wouldn't like."
Alex decided to go for the simplest explanation. "Olivia is taking me on a date tonight."
Mr. Cabot, the person who'd taught Alex everything she needed to know about having a poker face, didn't react. "A date, as in… a romantic date?"
"How many kinds of dates are there, Daddy? Yes, a romantic date."
Mr. Cabot cleared his throat and took a sip of water, and Alex waited what felt like an eternity for him to acknowledge what she'd said. "But Alexandra, you're not a lesbian," he finally said, shaking his head slightly. "And you have plenty of options besides Robert. Word just hasn't gotten around that you're available yet."
Alex waited to make eye contact, folding her hands on her lap, and spoke softly. "Daddy, this has nothing to do with Robert or having other options. I've come to realize that I am a lesbian. And I'm going on a date with Olivia because of how I feel about her."
"And how do you feel about her?"
"I love her," Alex said simply. "The way I feel about her… it's the way I should have felt about Robert."
Mr. Cabot continued looking at his daughter and took another sip of water. "After everything you've been through, it's normal to be confused, Alexandra. Give it time. You'll meet a nice man…"
"I'm not confused," Alex said harshly, her voice low.
"Okay, let's not make a scene," Mr. Cabot said calmly.
"I'm not confused, and I'm not going to wait to meet a nice man. Obviously Olivia and I have to start dating, but I'm pretty sure about her, Daddy. I hope you can support that."
Mr. Cabot signed the credit card receipt and sighed. "You're my only daughter, Alexandra, and I'll always support you. But I'm going to need some time to get used to the idea."
Alex nodded, accepting that this was the best he could do for now. "We'll just have to give each other some time, then," she said.
She got up to leave the restaurant, and her father stood, wrapping her in another hug and kissing her cheek. "Take care, Alexandra."
Alex kissed his cheek back and returned the hug, then walked swiftly out of the restaurant to buy some pillows and get ready for her date.
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