Chapter 50
A/N: Please note the time jump. We left off in the year 2000.
A/N 2: Flashbacks are in Italics. Dreams are between these symbols- ########.
A/N 3: T/W: Sexual assault (in a dream sequence).
June 12th, 2002
After many trials, tribulations, trips to the hospital, therapy sessions, and of course, studying, Ziva finally got her GED.
It had been two years since she had been to Israel. Two years since she had been violated.
She and Tony toyed with the idea of moving in together, as they were very serious at this point in their relationship.
However, Ziva was still having many major setbacks. She had PTSD and was suffering from extreme depression and anxiety.
The previous year had been difficult, to say the least.
Flashback
March 23rd 2001
Most days Ziva would sleep until 2pm. She often suffered from night terrors so she didn't sleep.
And when Ziva didn't sleep, Gibbs didn't sleep. One day he was so tired that he fell asleep at the wheel and almost went off the road. Thankfully Probationary Agent Timothy McGee was in the front seat and grabbed the steering wheel before slamming the car into park.
Since then, Gibbs had Tony, Jenny or Rachel stay with Ziva at all times. Larry would gladly watch her when he wasn't on a business trip, but he was away more often than not.
Tony was concerned for his girlfriend of one year. She looked so fragile all the time, as if she could break at any moment.
July 10th, 2001
In the sweltering heat of the 90-degree weather, Ziva would hide the cuts on her arms and thighs under long sleeves and pants.
She never minded the layers as she was always freezing anyway. Her weight had plummeted to 82 pounds.
Her cheekbones were sunken in; she had dark circles under her eyes. Her once olive colored skin was almost gray. Her thick locks fell out in clumps.
It hurt to sit, to move, to be touched. She would slice her skin to feel something, to know she was alive. She loved to watch the blood run down her legs and down the drain.
She would hide herself away in her bedroom, hoping those around her would forget she was there, that maybe if she prayed hard enough, she would just disappear.
She wanted to do more than just disappear. She wanted to die.
End Flashback
(Still) June 12th, 2002
Ziva sat in the kitchen having dinner with Gibbs. Flashes of lightning outside lit the dim room. Thunder and sounds of rain filled the house. "Papa? Can I sleep in your room tonight?" She asked, taking a bite of her mashed potatoes.
Gibbs looked at his 18-year-old daughter, surprised at the question coming from her mouth.
He held back a chuckle. "Ziver, you're eighteen years old, you still need dear old dad to stay with ya every time there's a thunder storm?"
She swallowed a mouthful of spinach. "Well, Tony's not here so…please?" She looked at him with pleading eyes.
He got up, picking up his empty plate to put into the sink. He walked over to her and kissed her on the head. "Of course, kid."
Gibbs couldn't say no to that face, she had been through so much in the past 2 years.
Ziva finally looked healthy. She was up to 95 pounds and was eating at every meal. Her self-harming was few and far between. She was still having some night terrors and had self-esteem issues due to her scars.
Tony was there for her when Gibbs couldn't be. They had only been 'together' five times in the past two years, but he knew she was delicate and he never initiated sex, she always did. He went as slow as she needed him to. He was very gentle and attentive.
Of course, Gibbs wasn't thrilled with the idea of his daughter being sexually active, especially with one of his own subordinates, but he seemed to make her happy and was one of the good ones.
At 0300, Ziva and Gibbs were asleep. Ziva was whimpering and was clearly having a nightmare.
##################################
"Tony, what is the matter with you?!" Ziva shouted as Tony grasped her wrists, pinning her against their bedroom door.
Tony grinned; he was practically drooling. "You're what's the matter with me. You just make me so frustrated. All I wanna do is screw you against the wall and I can't! Poor, delicate Ziva, so fragile, I'm SICK OF IT!" He removed his belt and unzipped his pants.
His eyes were wild with lust as he entered her hard. "Please! Stop! It hurts!"
He smacked her across the face, "Shut up bitch. You know you love it." He pinned her shoulders to the wall, she slammed against it with each thrust.
###################################
Gibbs tried to calm his crying and thrashing daughter. "Ziva, wake up!" She was still trying to fight him. "ZIVA!" He shouted.
She heard his voice and woke up. "No! Get off me, please stop!" She tried to push him away.
"Ziva it's me, it's Gibbs!" She looked at him with fear and embarrassment.
"Gibbs. I…I am so sorry I—" Gibbs held her face in his hands. "You were having a nightmare." He stroked her cheek with his thumb.
Her voice shook. "Tony was ra—raping me. He…it felt so real." Tears ran down her face.
Gibbs kissed her forehead. "It wasn't, it's okay. You're okay, my girl." He pulled her close. "Papa's here. You're safe." He stroked her hair as she cried, her tears wetting his t-shirt.
When Gibbs awoke the next morning, he found it impossible to move; mostly because his arm was trapped under his sleeping daughter. He smiled he wrapped his arms around her, feeling her heart beat, hearing her breathing softly. 'This moment is perfect' He thought to himself.
He closed his eyes and thought of Shannon and Kelly. He missed them so much, but he had his Ziver now. He was happy, finally.
A/N: Just a fluffy update to get y'all through. I'll update again soon!
