Chapter Synopsis: While looking for props to use for her comedy act, Luan finds some important looking documents written by Lana


It is April 14, 2018. Luan is busy rummaging through a closet looking for some props she can use for her comedy act, when she finds a piece of paper. It looks half complete, but nevertheless, Luan tries to decrypt it:

Luan,

Thanks for giving me the inspiration to come up with a way to solve our disagreements. Remember when you - - UN -. You looked amazing as -, by the way, - - -! I've hidden 10 other documents for you to edit. After all, shouldn't my - have the honor to do so?


Luan searches for the other 10 documents. She finds one of them taped to the bottom of Lana's skateboard.

Positions

- Luan

- Lincoln

- Lana


The rest of the positions are intentionally left blank. The second document is taped under Lincoln's bed. Luan removes it and reads it.

Preamble

This document hereby certifies the - of a united - -, by appointing each sister as a - of each - of the - -. 5 siblings shall be appointed as leaders of the 5 divisions of the - -. - will run the daily functions of the organization. - will run the protection agency. - will handle the economic functions. - will be responsible for any further actions taken. Finally, the most important role will go to -, who will impart justice on any wrongdoers. However, even if the assembly division will be the most used, - will still have supreme authority over all other divisions, unless there is a supermajority vote against it.

Addendum 1: This governing body should be used for major disagreements only. If it is a minor disagreement, the 2 opposing parties will have to resolve the conflict on their own accord by coming up with some sort of compromise.


Luan finds the third document hidden behind Lucy's Princess Pony poster, which is hidden behind Lucy's Vampires of Melancholia poster.

Voting procedures

Once a situation is deemed worthy enough to go to the -, then it will either be sorted into the - or the -, depending on the situation. In both cases, all members will have one vote with equal power. Within our original 11 members, action will be taken on the decision that has at least a 6-5 or 5-6 split.

Addendum 2.1: If - of the 11 members becomes indisposed, incapacitated, or deceased, or is kicked out of the - -, or leaves voluntarily, then the vote will be out of -.

Addendum 2.1.1: In the event of an even spilt with an even number of members, then we shall be forced to include the parental units (Lisa's words, not mine).

Addendum 2.1.2: If Addendum 2.1.1 is invoked, and the result is still an even split, then a 3rd party will have to be included.

Addendum 2.2: -, as - will have the power to choose who this person is. Once they have chosen, a member will give the facts of the situation of the party, making sure that they omit names and use only gender-neutral pronouns, as to not bias the 3rd party.

Addendum 2.2.1: - can overrule -'s choice, but then they have to choose the 3rd party.

Addendum 2.2.2: If -'s 3rd party is biased, or - sways the vote in their favor, then this 3rd party is removed and Addendum 2.2 is put into effect again, if this is the first time Addendum 2.2.2 is invoked, then - CANNOT overrule -'s second 3rd party choice.

Addendum 2.3: You can abstain from voting. But it will cause backlash.


The fourth document is hidden behind a picture of Lola.

- Overview

The - is the division that can exercise all authority within the - -. - is the leader of this division. They can tell the others what they can and can't do. Unless a supermajority vote is against the leader of this group, then - will have all authority.

Addendum 3: The vote to oust the - leader CANNOT be vetoed by the leader!


The fifth document is stuffed together with a bunch of Lisa's x-rays.

- Overview

The - is the division that is our financier. - controls the distribution of wealth, and as such, they have a major responsibility. Because of this, this division has the most restrictions on it!

Addendum 4.1: The - leader CANNOT hoard the money all to themselves.

Addendum 4.1.1: If they do, they will be unanimously ousted and replaced with a different member.

Addendum 4.1.2: If all members try to hoard money, and thus, are all ousted. This division will be rendered defunct and all money that is not in a wallet or purse goes into the E26-R-MJ to be distributed amongst everyone. The money absorption only happens once, when every member is ousted.

Addendum 4.1.3: The E26-R-MJ is in possession of the - leader, unless all members are ousted, in which case, the jar becomes its own separate entity which no other member can possess but can deposit and withdraw money at their leisure.

Addendum 4.1.4: No, a member CANNOT withdraw ALL or NEXT TO ALL of the money in the E26-R-MJ. A member can only withdraw $44 dollars once a month at the most.

Addendum 4.2: A member CANNOT bribe the - leader to give them more money.

Addendum 4.2.1: If a member trying to bypass Addendum 4.2 is discovered, then their bribe goes into the E26-R-MJ.

Addendum 4.2.2: If the member is offering a service to the - leader for money, it is considered a bribe.

Addendum 4.3: The only time Addendum 4.2.2 isn't considered a bribe is if the - leader claims it's a "job".

Addendum 4.3.1: To explain what counts as a "job", the member must explain what they're trying to do for cash to the - leader. Next, the - leader must get authorization from the - leader, -. If they ok it, then it is considered "legal" to do said "job" for monetary gain.

Addendum 4.3.2: If the - leader is ousted, and a new member is appointed to fill in the position, they can decide what counts as a "job". Though to overturn it, they must explain to the - leader why it should be overturned.

Addendum 4.3.3: The job must be paid by the - leader's own money, and not from the E26-R-MJ, otherwise, the use of the E26-R-MJ for personal use is considered grounds for fraud, as well as a unanimous ousting!


The sixth document is in Lily's crib. Luan removes Lily, grabs the document, and replaces Lily inside the crib.

- Overview

The - is what determines justice within the - -. If a criminal action has happened within the confines of the - -, then it goes here to be deliberated by the members. The punishments are as follows:

Assaulting Lincoln in any capacity: Grounded until 18/Grounded for life

Assaulting any leader: Grounded for 5 months

Assaulting any member: Grounded for 2 months

Fraud/Embezzlement: Grounded for 12 weeks

Extortion/Blackmail: Grounded for 7 days

Abuse of Power: Immediate ousting, grounded for 2 days

Bribery: Grounded for 21 days

Conspiracy: Grounded for 6 days

Corruption: Grounded for 2 weeks

Addendum 5: A convicted member can be paroled if the other members reach a supermajority vote advocating for it

Addendum 5.1: Punishments are only in effect if the - convenes. If the court is not in session, then punishments do not apply

Addendum 5.1.1: Unless, the crime is why the court convened in the first place, that is the only exception

Addendum 5.2: If a crime has been committed, but a punishment has not been determined for it yet, then the - leader must come up with an appropriate punishment.


The seventh document was in the basement, it was crushed in between Lynn's bed mattresses.

- Overview

The - oversees the protection of the entire - -. Admittedly, it's the least used, since we already all protect each other, but it's still nice to have.


The eighth document was under Lori's bed, buried under her massive pile of shoes.

- Overview

The - is where we vote on all major issues that affect us within the - -. It is the most used of all the divisions.


The ninth document is hidden within Leni's fabrics.

Postamble

This organization was created to solve major disputes within the - -. I hope that we can all band together and make a better - -.


The tenth and final document is behind Luna's Mick Swagger poster. It contains one last sentence.

Well, Luan? Will you help me finish creating this organization? I already know the perfect situation to test it out on.

Luan finishes writing and completes all the documents. She calls a sibling meeting to inform everyone.


"I'm glad everyone is here. Now I called you all here to tell you that I found some documents that Lana made, she wanted to make a unilateral organization so that we can resolve any major conflicts we have within the Loud house. Lana appointed me as the secretary general of this organization, so that means I can assign you the other roles. But for the purpose of testing out the organization today, I will only tell you that Lana has nominated Lincoln to be the president of the Loud Council's Assembly Division, or L-CAD, for short. Since L-CAD will be the most used, Lana gave us a sample situation to test it out on. It's about the dress." Luan elucidates

A collective groan is heard.

"But we already know that the dress is black and blue, why do we need to deliberate on that?" Leni complains

"Not THAT dress, Leni! She means the blue one! You know…" Lincoln reminds her

Leni realizes what Lincoln is talking about.

"Oh…"

They all move to the dining room table, which Luan temporarily converted into a circular bench (as in, the ones judges stand behind, not an actual bench) with each of their names on a placard that Luan made in advance. Lincoln, being the head of this division, gets the front seat, while the sisters sit on the sides. Lincoln begins the proceedings.


"Loud House Argument Number 57: Lori vs Leni on the matter of the dress. Leni, give your opening statement to the court." Lincoln announces

For some reason, Confrontation/Moderato 2011 from Gyakuten Kenji 2 begins to play…

Leni's Argument

"Ok, Linky. It was about 7:40 AM on January 11, 2017. I decided to go to the mall to buy myself a new dress. At the mall, I went to Bap, and found a cute sky-blue dress that totes made me look good. I paid $48 dollars for it and the receipt showed the purchase was made at 8:00 AM. After that, I went to my room to model it to show it to my siblings. It was about 8:20 AM when I came down and saw that Lori had bought the exact same dress as me. I ordered her to take hers back, because I had already bought one, and that I wanted to show off my version to our sisters."

"Ok, Lori? Your rebuttal, if you please?" Lincoln encourages

The music changes to Confrontation/Allegro 2011!

Lori's Rebuttal

"It was about 7:54 AM when I went to the mall. I headed into a department store and found a dark cyan dress, it was literally my favorite article of clothing in the entire store. I paid $41 dollars for it and the timestamp on the receipt said 8:08 AM. I went inside our house to show the dress off to our sisters when Leni came down, wearing the exact dress I bought!"

The music changes once again to Confrontation/Presto 2011!

"Alright, Loud siblings, we've heard both sides of the story. Now, whoever says that Leni had the dress first, raise your hand."

Leni, Luan, Lana, Lucy, Lily and Lincoln raise their hands.

"Now, whoever thinks that Lori had the dress first, raise your hand."

Lori, Luna, Lola, Lynn, and Lisa raise their hands.

It's decided 6-5, Leni had the dress first!

The members who voted for Leni cheered, while the ones who voted for Lori are slightly irritated.


"That was WAY easier than that stupid sister fight protocol, don't you agree, Luan?" Lana questions

"Yeah, this was a pretty good idea, Lana." Luan admits

"And no one even abstained from voting this time! I didn't think that would happen."

"I'm surprised too."

"Well, that was a successful test run, I leave it in your hands now, madam president." Lana states

Finally, the dress dispute has been put to an end! And the formation of the Loud Council will prevent any incidents like that from ever happening again. As for the minor disagreements, Lincoln said it best. "Next time I have a problem with one of my sisters, I'll just talk to them instead of leaving a message or writing a nasty letter." So, they did. The one-year anniversary of Lana's death is coming up soon. I wonder how the Loud siblings will prepare for it.


Author's Note: Yeah, so Lana's solution to major disagreements within the Loud house was to make a model UN for the siblings! How did this happen? Well, Lana got the idea when Luan had to do a model UN project for her social studies final. The whole family was there. Don't worry, Luan got an A+ for her part in the project! As you can tell, Lana's LC documents were written before April 26, as Lynn is included as a member.

A slight modification from the real United Nations, there are only 5 major divisions instead of 6, and even then, it's more like 4 divisions. Lana's version has these divisions.

Secretariat
General Assembly
Economic and Social Council
Security Council
Court of Justice

The Trusteeship Council wasn't included because there are no "territory" disputes in the Loud house, as well as the real counterpart in the United Nations not even being needed since 1994. The Security Council is there, but since the Inner Circlet formed, it's pretty much a nonissue at this point, seeing all the siblings have vowed to protect each other by joining the Inner Circlet. The "Social" part of the Economic and Social Council is also rendered useless because of the Inner Circlet, as all major disputes are filtered out before needing to use this, and minor disputes are worked out with a compromise between the 2 opposing sides.


Even though Lana chose Luan and Lincoln's positions, this is who I chose to be the leaders. You can change all other positions except Luan and Lincoln's for your version.

Luan: Secretary General, L-COC leader
Lincoln: L-CAD leader
Lana: LC-DH leader
Luna: L-CSP leader
Lisa: L-CED leader

Lana's modified names of the UN divisions are as follows:

Secretariat- Order Chamber
General Assembly- Assembly Division
Court of Justice- Deliberation Hall
Security Council- Security Precinct
Economic and Social Council- Economic Division


Addendum 2.1.1 says that in the case of an even split between the siblings, either caused by an even number split on the sides, or by an odd number abstaining, Rita and Lynn Sr will have to get involved in the tie. Taking the situation from In Tents Debate, that was a 5-5 split, with Lincoln abstaining. If both voted for one of the locales, then the family would go there, but let's say that Rita picked Aloha Beach and Lynn Sr picked Dairyland Amoosment Park, then the family is still deadlocked with a 6-6 split. From here, Lincoln can stop abstaining and vote for one, breaking the tie, or Addendum 2.1.2 is invoked which involves getting a 3rd party involved. Usually, that 3rd party will be Clyde. Lincoln would present the facts to him while omitting the names of any Loud siblings (as that could bias him, he could just pick something solely because Lori picked it). Clyde would then vote, breaking the tie.

Addendum 2.1.2 says that Luan can override Lincoln's choice if she feels his 3rd party is biased. If Lincoln made a mistake and accidently said that Lori picked choice X instead of choice Y, and Clyde chose choice X because of Lori, then Luan overrides his tiebreaker vote and replaces Clyde with someone she chose. If Luan's choice is biased, then Lincoln gets to pick another 3rd party because of Addendum 2.2.2 and Luan CANNOT override Lincoln's second choice.

Addendum 2.3 says that the siblings can abstain from voting, but it will cause backlash. This is a reference to the episode "In Tents Debate", where Lincoln abstained from voting on where to decide to go on vacation (and extorting excellent service from his sisters in doing so) which ended badly for everyone. Luckily, Lincoln made up for it by giving his sisters the same treatment they gave him at Scratchy Bottom Campgrounds (terrible name, by the way. Who'd want to go to a place named that?). Lana put that in as a word of warning to try to discourage others from not voting. Why didn't she just force everyone to vote? She wanted to give them the choice.

In the Economic Division, there's something called the E26-R-MJ. Remember that money jar that was mentioned all the way back in chapter 2? The one that Lana wanted Lisa to make to prevent another It's A Loud, Loud, Loud, Loud House situation from arising again? Yeah, that is THIS jar. The E26-R-MJ stands for Episode 26 Resolution Money Jar. Episode 26 being the aforementioned It's A Loud, Loud, Loud, Loud House.

Why is the punishment for attacking Lincoln so severe when compared to the other ones? Well, Lana equates one of the Loud House laws with a REAL law! Which one is it for assaulting Lincoln? Attempted murder of a president or high treason against the government itself! Whereas assaulting any leader would be equated to assaulting a government official and assaulting anyone else is just normal assault and battery. It might be an overreaction on Lana's part, but considering what happens to Lincoln in the Loud House...maybe not. Luan certainly agrees with Lana's punishments.


Yes, I referenced the dress. It can't be just me who thinks of it every time I re-watch Brawl In The Family. But we aren't talking about that dress, we're talking about the blue one that Lori and Leni got into an argument over. Yeah, the sisters don't want to be reminded of that debacle, even they hate the way they acted in that episode. At least they agree with us, and the sister fight protocol was abolished after the incident, so at least something good came out of it. Lincoln's announcement is that it's argument #57. The Loud House's 57th episode is Brawl In The Family. And of course, we can't get into an argument and a rebuttal without putting some Gyakuten Kenji 2 Confrontation 2011 music to heighten the mood. Here's the breakdown of how everyone voted.

Lori, Lola and Luna voted for Lori, because that's what they voted for in Brawl In The Family

Leni, Lana and Luan voted for Leni, because that's what they voted for in Brawl In The Family

Lynn voted for Lori, because she's afraid of what would happen to her if she didn't

Lucy voted for Leni, because Lynn voted for Lori

Lily voted for Leni, because she saw Leni wearing blue before Lori, so Leni must have had the dress first

Lisa voted for Lori, because Lana voted for Leni

Lincoln voted for Leni, because after considering the facts, he concluded that Leni had the dress before Lori did

Why are Lana and Lynn's votes included when one is a ghost and the other is in prison? Because this is a trial run. For Lynn, I chose what she would've chosen if she was at the assembly. Lana is a special case because Addendum 2.1 says that deceased siblings can't vote. Well no one could have guessed that Lana would stay in the Loud house as a ghost! The reason why deceased siblings' votes aren't included is because the living siblings can't SEE the votes of the dead siblings. This is because their ghosts usually ascend to a higher plane of existence once they leave their bodies, so they can't be seen anymore, but Lana never left. The other siblings can see Lana vote, and as such, her vote is counted.


As a side note, something good came out of all the Fatal 4 episodes!

Sound Of Silence: Lincoln agreed to not use the Noise-B-Gones, while the sisters gave him slightly more alone time (not much in a chaotic house such as this one, but every little bit helps.)

It's A Loud, Loud, Loud, Loud House: The E26-R-MJ, which is a money jar that Lisa made at Lana's request. It totals up all the money and divides it amongst the siblings dictated by a programmable variable, in this case, number of siblings. It is set to 9 at this moment, as Lana has no more need for money, and Lynn doesn't need money in prison. No more fighting over money!

Brawl In The Family: The Sister Fight Protocol was repealed and replaced with the Loud Council, Lana's mock United Nations. This mitigates all major disagreements to a minimum! No more major arguments like the ones in the Fatal 4!

No Such Luck: This very fanfic, which brought Lincoln and his sisters closer than ever before!

Next is the final chapter of Sycophant, which ends in universe on April 26, 2018! 1 year has passed since Lana's death, so it seems like it's time for their story to come to a close. See you next time for the conclusion of Sycophant.