~Ladystarlet09~ I don't own any of the LOR, Amy is of my own work and imagination. Please leave new reviews of what you think on the story's progression and be sure to check out my other fanfics that I am currently writing! Enjoy!

~Translation from Elven to English:

*Erulissë, "Fairest Elven child"


~Ladystarlet09 here. I am really loving the reviews here! This is just something funny I thought about while working on my homework. Enjoy!


"Ada, since when could you cook?" Amy asked one evening over dinner as she and the others sat around a small dinner table, eating Italian pasta with warm lembas bread and salad.

Erynion raised an eyebrow at her while taking a bit of salad. He chewed slowly before swallowing and taking a sip of wine. "Are you saying that elves can't learn how to cook for themselves?" He replied mildly.

Her ears started to turn bright red, a sure sign that her protective wards were starting to wear off. And a not so good sign for Erynion because he didn't have any wards that he could place upon if needed. Amy mumbled to herself about having to keep her mouth shut more often as she stabbed madly at her plate.

"I just don't think she is really familer yet with how one can adapt to a given environment so quickly, Erynion." Haldir pipped in casually as he sat back in his chair with a glass of wine sitting between his slender fingers. "In fact," He turned his grey eyes upon the older elf. "I feel that it is time for lessons to be taught and minds to grow." Adding with a small smile before he sipped his drink.

Mary hid a smile behind a choking cough while Amy let out a dismay groan. "But Ada, I thought the reason for this trip was to spend more bonding time with you." She cried with a feeble child-like kick.

"Doesnt meant that we won't, child." Erynion replied as he stood up to pour himself another glass. "Mary? More wine?"

The other girl beamed very brightly as she hastily held up her empty glass to him. "Of course! How could I possibly pass such a kind offer?" She laughed. Amy rolled her eyes upwards with a silent prayer.

"And I wondered how wood-elves took to wine more easily then us." Haldir said while he watched her let out another tiny giggle. "Apparently, you let the wine get to your head before it even hits your stomach."

Mary shrugged as Erynion handed her half-filled wine glass. "So? What about it?" She challenged him with another giggle. "Its not like I get to drink like this often back home."

"You are completely drunk!" Amy cried. She reached over to grab her best friend's glass away from her, but Mary was much too fast and was up and out of her seat swiftly before Amy could even blink. "Hey!"

"Slightly drunk, Amy." The slightly older girl corrected with a small wiggle of her left forefinger. "But not too drunk to not hit a marked target."

"Oh boy." Erynion whistled. "You shouldn't have said that, Mary."

"And pray, why not, my lord?" She turned around with wide eyes.

Haldir allowed the smuggest smile to touch his lips as Erynion answered for him in a very low tone. "Because you just openly challenged the most well-known elven archer who is the best of the best. No one can beat him."

Mary's eyes slowly blinked three times before she finally replied in a slightly thick voice. "Who may that be?" She asked stupidly. Amy could barely suppress her obvious groan of utter dismay, hiding her eyes behind her hands as Erynion lifted a slender hand and pointed.

Directly at Haldir himself who was sitting with his arms crossed over his chest.

"Him. You just challenged Haldir to a contest of who could shoot the fastest without missing his or her mark in a span of sixty seconds."

"Mary, Mary, Mary." Amy said over and over again without lifting her face from her hands. "Why do you do this to yourself? This always happens whenever you get yourself drunk."

"Oh shut up, Amy. I can easily out beat this..." She sized him up for moment. "This captain/master archer easily with a bow."

Erynion took away the glass from Mary. "I think that only way you are going to prove yourself is in a match against the march-warden himself. I will be the one to judge for myself if whether or not you are able to reach the caliber of Haldir's experience when it comes to a bow and arrow. Forget the swords, that will come another time when you are less drunk and less risky of cutting off your own foot instead of your opponent."

"But Ada!" Amy protested loudly as she followed them down a long corridor that lead to the main exercise room with Haldir quickly catching up from behind. "She will put an arrow in someone's ass in the current state that she is in. You can't possibly expect her to handle a weapon!"

"Amy, you will find someday that not all elves work good sober." Erynion sighed as he switched on the lights, momentarily blinding everyone for second until their eyes were able to adjust to the brightness.

"Damn Ada, you have one of hell of a workout gym in here."

Erynion couldn't help but smile smugly himself while leaning a shoulder against an ab workout equipment. "What can I say? I like to workout and keep in fit. Elves are rather vain creatures as Haldir and Mary's mother might tell you one day, but we prefer being athletic so we don't lose precious naturally honed skills that are vital to our overall survival in battle."

"So where do you practice your archer, Erynion?" Asked Haldir as he looked around the spacious room filled with various workout stations. "I know that is one skill you wouldn't dare leave idle."

"Why don't you guys follow me and see for yourselves?" The former march warden smiled widely.

They did as he asked and followed him into a different room that looked like a dance studio without any windows. On one side, there was a whole mirror wall and the other, stood a big blue target painted into the wood with yellow center for the bulls eyes. There were many holes in the wall itself, showing that someone had been practicing on a daily basis down here for a very long time.

Erynion grinned. "So, how about it?"

Mary shrugged as she tossed her hands in the air. "Sure, I don't give a damn nation hell."

He turned his gaze at the other male elf. "And you?" He asked quietly. "Do you feel good to accept her challenge?"

Haldir snorted, indigent that the question had even been asked. "Are you kidding me? With her being like that, I can bet my whole wallet she will be fully passed out before I even get my tenth arrow in the damn mark."

"Haldir, that isn't really nice of you to say that." Amy chided him with a elbow to his rib. Haldir grunted slightly at the pain he felt when she did, but he kept his face from showing it as he looked around the empty room.

"So, where do you keep your equipment?"

Erynion went over the light switch panel and pressed a concealed button beside it. "Where one is least expecting to find such prized possessions." He replied as one of the mirrors slowly turned around, revealing a hidden weapon holder that contained two sliver bows with embedded rubies and opals along the hilts, handmade arrows, a set of elven daggers that were similar to the ones Haldir had and a long curved sword that matched his that laid hidden in his guest closet.

Amy swallowed as her round eyes took in the unmatched beauty and craftsmanship of her father's people. Yes, not a single soul in her world would be able to match that of the elves of Middle Earth.

Erynion walked over to them and reached for the two bows, tossing them expertly in the air. Haldir caught the one closet to him while Mary just barely caught hers with a clumsy backwards step towards the wall. Erynion didn't say anything as he handed them both ten arrows each.

"I will expect no cheating out of this challenge." He warned the both of them as they accepted the arrows from him. "Play fair and whoever wins this will be allowed a sword lesson from me while the loser gets to cook all of next week's three meals a day."

Amy swallowed hard. If it was one thing that Mary couldn't' do, it was cooking. She hated cooking for as long as she could remember and just thinking of Mary losing to Haldir made Amy feel very ill suddenly. "I just think I will go sit myself down by the wall over here, Ada." Amy said in a very small voice. "I don't want to get in the way of all the arrows that will be suddenly flying around the room."

Erynion gave a short node as he waited for the two to prepare themselves for the challenge. It was hard since they weren't allow to hold a quiver for the ten arrows that they were given, but it seemed that Haldir had a easier time since his hands were bigger and they fitted just fine in it.

But Mary on the other hand...

She gave a impatient grumble as they fell repeatedly onto the floor. "Shit, if only I had a damn quiver." Somehow, she was bright enough to stuff them into her pants belt, but it would be more difficult for her to pull them out with ease since they were lodged between the leather belt and her jeans.

"So are we ready to start, guys?" Erynion stepped forward. Haldir have him a nod while Mary cursed under her breath after picking up an arrow and fitting into her bow.

"Yeah, lets get this done." She told him with a spark in her eye. "Just don't let my slight drunk state fool you, Haldir." She smiled sweetly to him.

The current march warden smirked as he focused his eyes on the target. "Whatever you say."

"Get ready." Erynion kept his eyes on the level of their bows as they slowly drew back the string.

"Fire."

What Amy saw next in a span of less than ten seconds had her completely floored. Haldir's body movements seemed to smoothly move as one with his bow as he shot arrow after arrow towards the marked target, his eyes intent as his fair face remained completely emotionless, body rigid and straight.

Mary as well seemed to changed before her very eyes as well. She too was graceful but with small hints slight human traits that came from living in a world that had didn't have what her mother grew up around back in Middle Earth. She was two second a little slower then Halidr, but nonetheless deadly with a bow as her arrows when straight into each other down the middle. Amy watched her hand reach without pause for her next arrow without looking down at her side.

"Stop."

The two combatants let out sighs and took several steps back as Erynion went over their separate marks and studies the spent arrows in complete silence.

Haldir grinned over at Amy. "I think I have this on in the bag." He chuckled while putting away his bow. When she didn't respond to him, his grin got bigger. "Malia ten'fion?" (care for some more wine?)

"Auta miqula orqu." (Go kiss an Orc) Mary sneered before slightly tripping over herself in going to putting down her bow.

"Enough with the insults you too." Erynion cut in suddenly in a hard voice that froze the two of them in place. He looked back and forth between Haldir and Mary, his lips thinned for a moment. "Mary, how long have you held a bow in your hands?" He asked her in a serious voice that broken no joking.

"Uh, since I can learn how to walk, why?"

Erynion pointed at her side of the wall. "Because it seems that you mother must have taught you advanced lessons that are at the level of a march-warden-in-training."

Both Haldir and Mary stared at him in shock and surprise.

"Erynion, Lle lakwenien?" (You'r joking right?) Haldir asked incredulously. "That's impossible. No one in the history of our people's race have allowed a female to be trained to the level of march-warden. Yes, greatly encouraged to know how to battle with weapons but not to be a march warden."

"Then you go look for yourself and tell me what your elven eyes see that I cannot." Erynon snapped, turning on him with flashing green eyes. Haldir swiftly walked to the wall for a moment and stared before coming back over slowly with a calculating look in his own eyes. Amy came over just in case something broke out into a fight between her best friend and her husband. "Is it true?' He demanded quietly.

Mary shrugged. "Like it was ever going to happen in my lifetime, buddy." She replied in a boring voice. "Sure, mother had me practice all the levels and ways of how to deal with a bow and arrow, but I knew that I'd never reach any possible level that Erynion or any other elf for that matter." She angrily crossed her arms over her chest, face slightly red. "If I was ever asked if I'd take the position by Galadriel herself, I'd just tell her that I'd rather go kiss an warg or an ugly orc then become one of you." Not waiting for anyone to respond to her sudden venom of words, Mary ran out of the room with Amy calling after her to wait up.

"She has a hidden talent, Erynion." Haldir said out the side of his mouth as they watched them leave. Erynion glanced at him out the side of his eye. "And what makes you say that?"

Haldir slowly inhaled and exhaled as he turned back around to face the where his arrows and her's stood silently in the wall on either side of each other. "Because she has the exact same technique as I use to take down a target. The signatures match each other to the perfect T."

Erynion walked up to his side and gave him a rough clap on the shoulder. "Lets just say that she has a good potential of becoming of us." He said before nodding towards the open door. "I suggest we go join them back in the living room before bedtime. I am sure she will want to another glass to help heal her injured female pride before sleeping the effect of the wine off for the rest of the night. Besides, the worst that she could do to you for this, is take a dagger and plunge it into your side during the night and leave her best friend a early widow."

"You know that you are a complete sucker for jokes, Erynion." Haldir said mid-way.

"Amin uuma malia en Tanya nae sai eina. " (I don't care & that was very funny)