This is mah Diary, Ichimaru Gin's Diary^^

We're still stuck in his bag…

Entry 521-530: Very Big n Suspicious n Slightly Movin' Bag Part 2

Entry 521

"Mornin' ev'ryone…"

"Shuzzup, Itsy-marlu…"

"Yer half drunk, ain't ya Tousen-san?"

"I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! GETSUGA TENSHOU!"

O.O

"We told ya da bag is strong, Kurosaki."

"Head count time…"

"Hai, Aizen-taichou…"

"Gin, Tousen, Mai, Aaroniero, Szayel Aporro, Zommari, Grimmjow, Nnoitra, Harribel, Barragan, Starrk, Lilnette, Tesla, Apache, Sun-Sun, Mila-Rose, Wonderwiece, Ggio, Findor, *shudders* Charlotte, Yammy, Ilforte, Di-roy, Kurosaki Ichigo, Kuchiki Rukia, Inoue Orihime, Kuchiki Byakuya, Shinji Hirako, Hyori Sarugaki, Rose, Love, Lisa, Hachi, Kensei, Mashiro, Abarai, Ishida, Sado, Neliel, Pesche, Dondacahkka, Loly, Menoly, Grin, Blots, Tentacles, Pink, Dracula (even though Ulquiorra isn't here), Chappy (Rukia's plush), Seaweed Ambassador (Byakuya's plush), Lady Cuddle Butts (Starrk's yorkie), and myself, the King of Everyone and Everything plus More! I think I got everyone…"

O.O "That's a lot of people…"

"No, really?"

"Is everyone here…?"

"Here, Aizen-taichou!"

"Present, Aizen-sama,"

"Here!"

"Here!"

"Present!"

"Here."

"HERE!"

"This'll take FOREVER! We're all here! You can effin' see that!"

"SILENCE NNOITRA JIRUGA! But you are right…"

Entry 522

"CONGRATUALTIONS AERO ACE! Yer da 200th Reviewer!"

"Ichimaru, who the heck are you talking to…?"

"Da readers, Rukia-chan^^"

"…Nii-sama…the man needs help…even if he is with Aizen."

"I agree, Rukia."

*five seconds later*

"Gin…"

"Ya, Aizen-taichou?"

"My brother…it has come to my attention that…you…hear voices."

"But ev'ryone hears it! Dere called reviews from people on FanFiction called Reviewers!"

"…I understand; the voices really do bother you…"

"No dey don't! Dey're nice! Dey helped entertain me 'round 'ere!"

"…Kuchiki Byakuya, you said that was a bad thing! As long as he doesn't bother my Espada, he's fine!"

"…Ichimaru…"

"Ya, Byakuya-san?"

"BOTHER THOSE DAMN ESPADA SO THE WAR CAN BE OVER!"

"What war? If dere is one, it ain't startin' yet! Can ya see inta da future? If ya can, den YER da weird one, not me!"

"Ichimaru, I never-"

"Nice chattin' ta ya, Byakuya-san. Hisana-san says hi!"

"S-she reincarnated?"

"Ya, she's a very nice lil' lady!"

"…"

*Byakuya-san mutters in da fetal position in da corner behind da couch when no one (but moi) notices…*

Entry 523

"Rukia-chan…"

"Y-yes, Ichimaru?"

"Will ya play a prank on Bya-kun with me? He don't believe Hisana is real I think…"

"…Indirectly, sure…"

"M'kay!"

*five seconds later*

"Hisana-nee-san! I can't believe it's you… Nii-sama misses you so much! He even cries over you sometimes!"

"Ya do dat, Byakuya-san?"

"I DO NOT!"

"Hahaha…"

"Shut it, Gin, you do that too over Matsumoto-fuku-taichou."

"SHUZZUP!"

"WHERE is Hisana?"

"Erm… By-a-ku-ya-sama…"

"H-Hisana…?"

"Uh, yup^^… It's me, alright…Bya-kuya-sama…"

"Hisana, the years that have gone by without you have been like a living nightmare. You complete me…" *Mah thoughts… He's my age? Ne, old man yer gettin' all mushy mushy!

"Er…thank you? I mean…you too…?"

"Hisana, abandon Aizen and come live with me. I do not care if you are a hollow and I am a Shinigami. All that matters is our love."

"…"

"AHAHAHA! Byakuya-kun, ya can't even recognize yer lover! Dat's not Hisana!"

"…Fool! I am taking her with me! Bankai! Sebonzakura Kageyoshi!"

"NO! I'M NOT YOUR DEAD WIFE! I'M MAI CIFER DECIMA ESPADA!"

"Hisana has reincarnated into an Espada…?"

"NO! ICHIMARU-SAMA JUST DIED MY HAIR BLACK AND WHATNOT!"

"…Oh…"

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'oh'? YOU JUST UNLEASHED YOUR BANKAI!"

"Oh shi-"

Entry 524

*after it all blows ova*

Aizen: "May I ask…WHAT THE F*** ARE YOU DOING…MY DEAR ESPADA?"

Espada: "We're rolling on the floor, what does it look like we're doing?"

"…Hm, I see…WHY?"

"We're tired."

"…So…you roll on the floor to waste your energy furthermore…?"

"Yup…and technically…we're not rolling on the floor. We're rolling in the very big and suspicious and slightly moving bag."

Entry 525

"OUCH!"

"What the heck…?"

"Someone's movin' da bag!"

"HEY YOU OUT THERE! PUT US DOWN OR I'LL KILL YOU WHEN WE GET OUTTA HERE!"

"EH? Uh…uh…I'M SO SORRY SPIRIT BAG!" *random Arrancar runs away*

"…Nice goin', Kurosaki. Now we're stuck in 'ere."

"Uh-oh...Gin…"

"Ya, Aizen-taichou?"

"You know those 'reviews' you hear?"

"Ya…I write 'em down so I don't fer'get 'em!"

"…someone wants to turn us into some stupid game where they pay five dollars and they get to pull one of us out of a bag!"

"Let's get rid of Zommari. He's always on a mission."

"I am right here…"

"All in favor of getting Zommari to a fangirl…or fan guy… say I!"

"I!"

"…"

Entry 526

"HISANA!"

"…Byakuya-san…I'm Mai…"

"Oh yeah…"

Entry 527

"ITSYGO!"

"Neliel! Yer so annoying when you're a kid!"

"Isn't she so cute, Nnoitra-san?"

"NO!"

"WAHHHH! NNOITRA YER SO MEAN! NEL DON'T LIKE YOU!"

"FINALLY! I HATE YOU TOO!"

"GIVE ME A PIGGY BACK RIDE!"

"NO! I REFUSE!"

*five seconds later*

"Nel like Nnoitra-kun now!"

"…"

"This ain't a very funny entry…"

"Gin…"

"Ya, Aizen-taichou?"

"You need to stop recording every conversation during the day."

"I don't write down ALL of 'em. Like I didn't write down dat one where ya were watchin' soap operas with Ulqui-orra and had a very serious talk 'bout who's da daddy o some baby on some show…"

Entry 528

"DAYS OF OUR LIVES WILL RETURN IN A MOMENT." AN: I don't own Days of Our Lives. Heck I don't even watch it. My neighbor's mom does though…

"Ne, Sosuke! You've hogged the TV for FIVE HOURS! Let someone else watch!"

"Fine…Grimmjow, you watch…"

"YES! SECOND SEASON OF BLUES CLUES, HERE I COME!"

"Ne, Blue should be a cat."

"Never thought I'd say this, Kurosaki, but I EFFIN' AGREE!"

Entry 529

"BWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!"

"What'cha doin', Kurosaki?"

"Ichigo, who's laptop is that?"

"Gin's. AND I JUST FOUND ULQUIORRA'S WEAKNESS!"

"Through a Bleach Funny Comics video…?"

"Oh, I saw one, Ichigo. It said 'The Amount of Blood in Kurosaki Ichigo's Body' and I saw Grimmjow and Ulquiorra drowning and blood up to the towers of Las Noches!"

"What's Ulqui-orra's weakness?"

"Watch this!"

*in da video*

Misa (from Death Note): "Hiya!"

Ulquiorra: *glances at her* "…Why am I in the same panel as her?"

Grimmjow: *pops in* "Cuz your name sounds Ugly-whore-a!"

Ulquiorra: *vein pop*glares*

Misa: *face says WTF?*

*out da video*

"What the…?"

"Ichimaru, what the heck…?"

"Ya asked me ta handcuff ya two, Grim-jow."

"No I didn't…"

"Liar."

"Really, Grimmjow? I have to share a room with you and that's still not enough?"

"He wants a lil somethin' somethin' ^^"

*PUNCH TA DA FACE :(*

Entry 530

"Ugly-whore-a! Haha! I should start callin' him dat!"

"Ugly-whore-a? HAHAHAHAHA!"

"Ulquiorra-sama will be mad at you when he finds out you're calling him that."

"Aw^^ Mai, you look cute with your hair down."

"That's because I had to use my hair tie as this bag's 'lock'. Why can't we just untie it from the inside?"

"Cuz I got Szayel Aporro to switch yer hair tie."

"WHAT? Why?"

"Grim-jow said ya look cuter with yer hair up."

"And…?"

"You wear your hair down too much!"

"…Not helping, Grimmjow."

"So Grim-jow got me ta get Szayel ta make a hair tie dat can only be taken off by some peoples."

"Which are…?"

"Szayel himself."

"He's passed out, so he won't help…"

"Hey, wait, what about me? I put on the hair tie yesterday…"

"Anyone can put it ON, but only a few peoples can take it OFF."

"Who else?"

"Grimmjow."

"I can't untie anything with one hand."

"Mai."

"I'm handcuffed to Grimmjow. Does it look like I can? Can you?"

"Nope… Ulquiorra can."

"He's not here."

"Wait, how did all the other people get in?"

"Szayel had a remote."

"…Wait…is this why Grimmjow randomly gave me that hair tie that was blue, light blue, green, and pink…?"

"Maybe…"

"NAP TIME!"

"Let's go, Mai."

"NO! I mean, no! UN-HANDCUFF US ICHIMARU-SAMA!"

"Can't."

"WHY?"

"Da little retard ate da only key."

"I take offence to that," said Rukia.

"No, not ya Rukia-chan! Wonderwiece!"

"Warrrrrggghhh."

"Ya seem more desprete den usual ta get away from Grim-jow."

"Uh…no, that's ridiculous! It's not like something happened! Nothing between me and Grimmjow happened that a few people happened to walk in on! How could you suggest a thing?"

"I didn't…"

End chapter!

Hm…CONGRATS TO AERO ACE! THEY ARE THE 200th REVIEWER!

Grimmjow: Espada Nap Time.

Gin: "Ya fer'got da S fer Snack Time, Grim-jow."

Grimmjow: "It's nap time, and we're running low on food since Yammy broke into the stash…

Gin: "Oh…G'night den!"

*a few minutes of silence later*

"…Mai…?"

"Hm…?"

"You awake?"

"No, I'm sleep talking right now, Grimmjow."

"Oh…night than…"

"It's always night…"

"Good point… hey, Mai?"

"What?"

"Do you think it's awkward that we're handcuffed together?"

"…Grimmjow, you make wayyy too many hand gestures."

"Your point?"

"YES, it's awkward! I'm pretty much on top of you!"

*slightly perverted thoughts* (AN: BAD GRIMMY XD) "You don't like being on top?"

"No, I don't, it's awkward. Now will you please do me a favor by letting go of me, you perverted stupid ca- oof!"

"If ya don't like being on top, you can be on the bottom."

"Grimmjow, dis is a HUMOR story! Not a romance one! Geez, Kitty-san, whaddya want me ta do? Call dis Espada Romance Time?" (AN: I could practice writing romance here! ROFLY)

"Good idea, Gin…"

"NO! Get off of me!"

"You enjoy it, don't you, Mai~?"

"NO! GTFO!"

"Awww, such a bad mouth for a girl! Why don't we-"

*KNEE TA DA CROTCH!*

"NO!"

Author's Notes:

Espada Romance Time… ROFLY.

I would practice my romance writing rofly rofly!

MY BIRTHDAY'S ON SATURDAY! YAYZ!

Guess who old I am?

Whoever guesses closest will…uh…get to choose an Espada to take home!

Sorry, NinjaCats, you can't guess. You already have Ulquiorra so don't whine XD

(Should I continue Espada romance (/humor) time?( Nah, I suck at romance^^)

PLEASE REVIEW!