Sorry Sorry Sorry Sorry Sorry Sorry!
I've been super busy, a screenplay I wrote got an offer, so that's been intense. But here we go!
I'm really excited for the next chapter as well. I'm trying something different for it, so look out for that very soon (and I mean VERY soon hopefully)
There are some little things in here that seem stupid, but it will become important in the future.
Reviews as always are very appreciated and always lovely!
Enjoy.
Chapter 50.
Remus Lupin was pacing. he did not pace, yet he was pacing. It seemed the longer he thought on it, the more he realised just how much he'd had the desire to pace over the last year, and it's cause came down to Nymphadora Tonks. He'd stomped out of her front door mere hours ago, and with no desire to go back to Grimmauld Place, he ended up at his parent's house, a day earlier than the moon called for. How strange it seemed that the place he detested beyond any other, now seemed better than Grimmauld. Still he paced through his father's study, up and down in front of the bookshelves, stopping only to sigh furiously and change direction, lashing out at thin air as if it were the culprit. She was foolish. She was young and foolish and completely ignorant to the truth, that was Lupin's final assessment of it all. Why should he have to argue his point, he hated arguing. It was just like pacing, Remus Lupin did not argue.
Yet here he was, doing both so frequently. Sometimes, as he angrily walked around the room, he wondered whether Tonks had put him under some kind of spell. It seemed impossible to enjoy the company of someone so much one-minute and be completely and utterly frustrated with them the next. Lupin knew he couldn't expect much of the first option anymore, not after what he had to do. Never again would he be able to crawl into bed with Tonks, kiss her, or even hold her the way he used to. The thought stopped him in his tracks. He had never thought about what he was losing; only what she would gain. He knew as much as she protested, she would be fine, she didn't need him, but did he need her? Was she the final pin holding him together now?
Midnight struck through the house with loud chimes from the still standing grandfather clock in the hall. Lupin finally stopped pacing and collapsed into the chair behind the desk. He threw his head into his hands and sighed, but this was not from anger, this was from exhaustion. Slowly he let it all wash over him. Things seemed infinitely harder these days. The Order was calling for him, and the war truly was beginning. All which seemed manageable before, was now decidedly not so. He knew the request from Dumbledore would come soon enough and then at the least he would have things to occupy himself, but for now, he had to deal with Tonks, however much he didn't want to do that. Lupin stalked off to his bed without any conviction for his thoughts. He had a whole sleepless night ahead of him to think about it anyway.
The following day, the first Lupin had really felt the dawning of summer, revolved around reading. He spent his day locked away in his father's study and as the sun set and the moon began to rise, Lupin was on his bedroom floor again. This transformation had a new feeling about it. For the first time, Lupin was going to be glad to be away from his mind for an entire evening, and afterwards he would finally sleep. What was not new, and what he was dreading the most, was the feeling beforehand. The guilt, the pain, the anger and this time, the pangs of sadness, all came rushing to him as he sat waiting. Lupin could only imagine this was how it felt to be waiting for a Dementor's kiss. The weight of the world descended upon his shoulders and more than ever the face of Tonks swum in his mind. His feelings were much more exasperated by his current state, but he knew, even without exaggeration, this was the very reason she needed to be away from him. As Lupin logically tried to think of a way to inform her of this, he missed the rising moon in the background, and catching him completely off guard was pain beyond any other. It felt like he was being torn apart, limb from limb and his blood was on fire. Just when he thought he was surely going to die, everything went black.
Darkness surrounded him. But it wasn't the same kind of darkness he was used too; it felt heavier and thicker than normal night-time. For a second Lupin thought he had come into his own mind during his transformation, but when he glanced downwards, he was standing on what looked like a stone floor and he was in his body, not a wolves. Confusion hit Lupin instantly. Where was he? Had he broken out again and woken up somewhere? He didn't have any bruises or grazes, so he had not transformed. The darkness seemed too unnatural to be night, yet it made no sense. He could hear a strange rustling sound, but it didn't quite sound like rustling, it sounded more like a whispering voice. Lupin couldn't understand what it was saying, and it was unnerving him slightly. He reached down for his wand but it wasn't there. The whispering sounded so familiar but Lupin couldn't work out where he'd heard it before. He could feel the wolfish senses in him picking up, and he sniffed into the air, but he couldn't smell anything but himself. Lupin took a step and the sound of his footstep echoed loudly. Lupin could only deduce that wherever he was, it was very big, almost church like. The whispering wasn't getting louder and the darkness wasn't lifting, but for some reason he thought he could see something moving just a few metres away. It looked like people, at least three. Something about their presence wasn't making Lupin feel scared, in fact he felt secure and comfortable, even though he had absolutely no idea where he was and he was completely defenceless.
"Hello?" Lupin whispered into the darkness, but he got no reply.
He took another step towards the three figures, but still, he could hardly make them out. The darkness seemed to be following him around wherever he walked.
"Is there anyone there?" Lupin asked, but again, no reply.
He took another step, and the darkness followed him. the three figures were still hidden, but Lupin was sure they were people. He knew if his eyes could adjust to the darkness he'd be able to see, but it was just too dark.
"Lumos," Lupin whispered, hoping maybe his wand was around him.
Far in the distance a light appeared and as Lupin looked around trying to find it, he could just make out the three figures. All he could see were the kindest green eyes, a small pair of glasses and longish hair with a causally flicked elegance.
Lupin woke with a start. His vision was blurry and everything was white, but he jumped to his feet, stumbling around hitting things blindly, trying to grab the three figures, because he knew who they were now. He ignored the pain in his body, as his heart began to race. Lupin felt his head connect with something very hard and then everything went black again.
Lupin could hear himself groaning before he even woke up. His head was aching as if it had been split in half, but he slowly opened his eyes. The sky was a beautiful shade of pink streaked with orange. His whole body ached, but Lupin picked himself up from his bedroom floor and walked through the magically unlocked door. Everything hurt as he walked, but he somehow found his parents bed, and collapsed into it, hoping to fall straight asleep. Yet sleep did not come. Instead he was allowed another sleepless night, except this time, along with his thoughts, he had complete body ache to keep him company. He took a chance, at what he assumed was about midnight, to look at himself in the mirror. He didn't have any new scars on his body, but he had one on his head. It was aching, in fact it was making his head throb as he touched it. It wasn't like the usual injuries he got when he was transformed and all he could think was that he had hit his head, during his sleep, but he had no memory of anything of the sort.
There was a loud hoot behind him, and more from surprise than fear, Lupin spun around, wand out. He found himself aiming at a tiny owl that had once followed him around the house. He instantly stored his wand away and walked over to it. It greeted him with a low happy sounding hoot and Lupin began to stroke its head. Knowing where it would lead him, Lupin tried hard not think about who had originally sent him this owl in the first place. It seemed stupid but he realised he'd never even asked Sirius where he'd gotten the owl in the first place. In an instant, as if it was a sign he'd not noticed, Lupin knew what to do. He had been debating for days about whether to do it, and this was the sign.
He shuffled to his father's office and pulled out some parchment and a quill.
Dear Albus,
I was wondering what would be an
appropriate time to come and see you?
Remus.
He folded it up and walked back into the bedroom. The owl hooted affectionately as he walked in, and Remus bent down so they were level.
"Do you think you can take this to Dumbledore?" He asked, and the owl responded with an eager hoot.
Lupin tied the letter to it and then watched it disappear into the darkness.
Lupin was awoken the next day by a loud hoot and instantly sat up to find the owl on his bed head. He untied the letter quickly and then ripped it open.
Dear Remus,
For you, the door of my office is always
open, night and day. I look forward to
speaking to you soon, no doubt.
Albus.
Lupin folded the letter into his pocket and then got out of bed. He left his parents house about an hour or so later, having fed the owl and himself. He felt more worn out and more exhausted than he had in a long time, as he hadn't got the few days of sleep afterwards like he used too. He rested his head on the cool pane of glass in his train carriage, which he had all to himself all the way back into London. The air in the city was muggy and hot, much different to out in the country, and Lupin could feel the heat robbing him of the small amount of energy he had left.
When Lupin swung the door open to Grimmauld Place, the first thing he noticed was that something didn't seem right. Nothing was moved, nothing was gone, but something didn't seem right. He heard a familiar low grumbling voice and relaxed instantly, knowing Moody was present. He followed the voice down into the kitchen and when he opened the door he found Kingsley, Moody and Tonks looking up at him.
"Remus," Moody said, greeting him as he stored his wand away.
An assortment of objects were piled up on the table, including Sirius' potion making kit. They were obviously doing a clean up, though Lupin had already done so. He nodded at Kingsley and connected eyes for a split second with Tonks, though neither smiled at each other. Her hair was a beautiful shade of calm sky blue. He had never felt so awkward in front of her before, and for a second he just wanted to forget everything and welcome her loving embrace, but he knew he mustn't.
"I can't find the rest of those Ministry plans," Moody growled angrily as he slammed the pantry door shut.
"They're upstairs. In Regulus' room," Lupin informed him, dropping into the seat the other end of the table to Tonks, who was deliberately not looking at him now.
Moody stomped off upstairs and Kingsley picked up a big stack of papers and moved towards the fireplace. He started the fire with a flick of his wand and slowly started burning the documents one by one. Lupin could feel himself drifting away into his mind, his aching body taking over and his tiredness making everything seem fuzzy.
"How was the transformation Remus?" Kingsley asked curiously. "We didn't expect you back so soon."
Lupin took we to mean Tonks as well, even though she was still purposefully staring away from him.
"It was fine. I just didn't get the usual amount of sleep afterwards," Lupin explained.
"Can't say I've been getting much myself lately either. I don't think anyone has been. Weren't you just saying you've been missing sleep Tonks?"
Lupin watched her eyes move to Kingsley and then she shook her head slowly. Kinglsey furrowed his eyebrows and looked between Tonks and Lupin a few times, obviously noticing what was going on. The amount of tension between them, and Lupin thought it was rightly so, was just that little bit too much for him. Lupin closed his eyes and sighed exhaustedly.
"I think I'll just go and help Alastor," Kingsley said apprehensively.
He backed out of the room and Lupin finally opened his eyes, watching him disappear out the door. When he looked back, Tonks still hadn't looked at him.
"Now we're causing people to run from rooms," Lupin attempted to joke, but Tonks made no response, causing him to wonder if she'd even heard him.
He wanted to be friends with her. He'd said that. He'd also said that he still loved her. So why couldn't she look him in the face? Didn't she know that more than ever he wanted to wrap up in her and never leave? Stay hidden until all the bad parts of life were gone. How he wished for that, but he knew it was not to be, it was not fair and it was not right. He closed his eyes again, for how long he didn't know, but when he opened them, Tonks' eyes were finally on him. They were sparkling in the way that made him feel warm inside, but in them was a sadness he had never seen before. It was not the obvious kind of sadness, but the kind you only understood if you knew someone well enough. Tonks broke the eye contact soon after it had started, and she stood, walking around towards the cauldron.
"How are you feeling?" Tonks asked in a very un-Tonks like voice and not meeting his eyes again.
"I'm fi–" Lupin started to say, but a glare from Tonks let him know lying would not be tolerated. "I'm exhausted, in about every possible way."
It felt good to tell her this, he always told her things like that and having his burden held up partly by her had always felt strangely good. Yet as he stared at her as she fiddled around with the cauldron, he knew he'd have to learn to live with out that feeling. It felt like starting to walk again when there was no one around to lean on. Tonks lit a fire under the cauldron and started pouring things in.
"What are you doing?" Lupin asked, furrowing his brow at her.
"Making you a potion," Tonks said, as if she needed no further explanation.
For a second Lupin thought she was about to poison him, and given how he'd behaved to her, he could understand why.
"What kind of potion?" He mumbled apprehensively.
"Pepper-Up."
Lupin was taken back by her still unperturbed care for him, even through everything that had happened.
"Tonks you don't have to do– "
"Shut up Remus," Tonks interrupted, silencing him more with her glare than her words.
Lupin did as he was told and did not retort her, or refuse what she was doing for him. In fact he was completely grateful, she was good enough to know it was exactly what he needed. The awkward silence that settled over them seemed so tense it was almost making Lupin's spine shiver. He'd never really upset Tonks for long enough to know this kind of treatment. Perhaps one day, when she understood the bigger picture, she could forgive him. Just as Lupin was about to get trapped in his own very melancholy thoughts, a goblet of Pepper-Up potion was placed in front of him. He looked up at Tonks, who was standing beside him, and smiled very thankfully. The potion was gone in a matter of seconds and instantly Lupin could feel it warming him up from the inside out. The exhaustion seemed to lift as well; even his eyelids didn't feel as heavy anymore.
"Thank you," Lupin said, marvelling at just how much better it made him feel.
"No problem," Tonks said as she took the goblet from him and flicked her wand to clean everything up.
The cauldron gave a feeble wobble in the air and then dropped back down to the stand. Tonks huffed loudly.
"I suck at these cleaning spells. Honestly I don't think anyone could be any worse," Tonks complained.
Lupin gave a slight smile and stood, flicking his wand at the table. Everything floated into mid air and moved to the sink, some cleaning themselves on the way and others filling themselves with water and soap. He flicked his wand at the scrubbing brush and it got to work on the cauldron.
"You just need practice," Lupin said, moving around the table to stand next to Tonks in front of the sink.
Tonks flicked her wand at one of the mugs that was yet to start cleaning itself. It gave another feeble wobble and then dropped back down to the tabletop. Lupin thought he heard Tonks growl in frustration.
"And patience," he added, smiling at her. "Here I'll show you."
Lupin placed his hand over hers and he directed her wand.
"Close your eyes," Lupin paused as Tonks rolled her eyes at his order, but she finally did it after a stern look from him. "Now, think about what you want to do, and say the incantation in your head."
Lupin waited a few seconds and then made the correct motion with her hand. Instantly the mug moved towards the water and then began to clean itself. He tried hard to ignore the fact he was standing directly behind Tonks, and that his entire body was buzzing because of it.
"Open your eyes," Lupin whispered into her ear.
"I did it!" Tonks exclaimed.
"You did," Lupin smiled.
Tonks turned around, clearly very excited, and wrapped her arms around Lupin's neck. The delight at her finally conquering a cleaning spell quickly flittered out and was replaced by the sudden realisation that Tonks was wrapped around him. At the same time he thought he felt Tonks tense up, perhaps she had come to the same realisation. Slowly they pulled apart, until the two of them were left staring at each other, Tonks' hands still hanging limply around his neck. Lupin could feel every muscle in his body tense up as the awkwardness of the situation he'd gotten himself into set in. The two of them were staring into each other eyes and Lupin knew exactly where this would go. He could see it in his mind, he knew exactly how things would progress if he closed the small gap between their lips, but he didn't. Instead, he glanced away, turning his head slightly. He felt Tonks hands drop from around his neck almost straight away. She took a few steps back.
"Sorry," Lupin muttered, not knowing exactly why he was saying it.
"There's nothing to be sorry for," Tonks said indignantly.
"There is. I shouldn't have done that," Lupin mumbled, still looking away.
He nervously brought his eyes back to Tonks and she was leaning up against the sink, her arms folded and a contemptuous look on her face.
"You shouldn't have helped a friend?"
Lupin looked at her, asking her to be serious for just a second. The silent order was not taken well.
"Well you set the friend rule, and in my mind, that was a friendly interaction," Tonks explained.
For a second Lupin was about to question her and the types of relationships she had with her friends, but he knew she was doing this to stray the point of their conversation.
"I've told you. This isn't going to work out the way you deserve Tonks. I can't do what you want me to do anymore. It's too hard and I just can't," Lupin explained, feeling his exhaustion creep back up on him as he spoke.
"No, you won't. And that makes all the difference in my mind," Tonks muttered spitefully.
For a second Lupin thought he saw hurt and pain flash through her eyes, he recognised it instantly because it was what looked back at him whenever he looked into a mirror, but almost instantly what was staring back at him was anger.
"No, I can't. It's not about that. I would. I would if I could, but I can't."
"Won't," Tonks retorted.
"Can't," Lupin said
"Won't," Tonks snapped, sounding more and more like a vindictive teenager.
"Can't," Lupin stressed, exhaustion and frustration really hitting him hard.
"Won't," Tonks spat, the hint of a smile on her face, as if she could possibly be enjoying this.
"Stop it," Lupin finally said, raising his voice slightly. "It's not as easy as that anymore. Do you really think I want this?"
"Yes I do," Tonks said unflinchingly and this time Lupin definitely saw hurt flash through her eyes.
"Tonks," Lupin said dropping his voice, and finding it hard to resist the urge to comfort her physically. "You deserve so much more than me. Someone richer, someone younger – just someone better. I can't be that, and you're too wonderful for anything less."
Tonks looked up at him as he pleaded, and he watched the anger filter out of her eyes. It was replaced by the look of unperturbed care that irked him so much. She took a few steps towards him and slid her hands under the lapels of his jacket, stopping to rest on his chest, one hand so perfectly sitting over his beating heart.
"But what if I don't want someone better, or richer, or younger? What if I just want you, however you come," Tonks asked, tears welling up in her eyes, threatening to break the barrier she had them behind.
Lupin had never really known Tonks to cry, he had seen it before, but nothing had ever broken his heart quite like this had. He wanted to make it stop and he hated that he was the cause of it, but he had to, just like a mission with the Order. He couldn't let his heart win when his mind was right. Tonks brought her chin to his chest, so her forehead was resting against his lips. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders.
"I'm sorry Tonks, but I just can't," Lupin whispered.
Tonks broke away from and was out the door before Lupin's arms had even dropped. Just as the door closed, he thought he heard her give one last sob, and it tore him apart, reverberating through his body, shattering his heart.
The walk upstairs felt like he was floating. He didn't hear the voices of Kingsley or Moody, even though they were calling out to him, he just ventured straight to the room of the person he wanted to see the most. He looked up at the little engraved plaque on the wall the read Sirius' name, and carefully opened the door.
It was exactly as it had been during the time Sirius lived here. The bed even looked like it was waiting for its usual occupant to return. In fact the whole room had an air about it that made it seem like the previous inhabitant was just going to come striding through the door any second. How Lupin wished for that. Sirius would have had the answer for Tonks so she didn't get hurt. He moved to the bed and sat down on the end of it, admiring all the posters on the wall. He'd always loved Sirius' cheek, and it was so fitting that his bedroom in his family home be completely covered in muggle posters. It had made him smile every time he'd walked into this room over the last year, but now it just made him feel hollow and empty. It made the feelings he buried come rushing back. His eyes caught something on the wall beside the bed that he had never seen before. Instantly it brought him up to his feet, and he moved over the wall faster than he had in days. There was Lupin, arms linked with Peter, James and Sirius. He remembered that day, and even knew it had been Mary who had taken the photo, much against Lily's wishes. Lily hated James then, though in one or two years after this photo was taken that was going to change.
What had alarmed him so much was not the photo, as he had a copy himself, but more or less that here were the two people he wanted to see more than anyone, and it was a really knee weakening pain inside him when he remembered that he couldn't. He collapsed down onto Sirius's bed, still staring at the picture on the wall. The waves of sadness he thought he was well shot of, hit him slowly, and as much as he tried to fight them, they were slowly pulling him under. Everything around him reminded him so much of something he needed to forget, something he needed to be away from just to get beyond it. As he got up, wrenching the door open and rushing outside, the one inescapable truth hit him, as it had a few days before with Tonks. He was alone. He, the one who had needed the others more than he thought they needed him, was now alone. Grief turned into anger faster than the blink of an eye. He was angry at the cards he'd been dealt, the raw deal he always seemed to receive and he was angry with James and Sirius for leaving him. He was angry that he always had to be the one picking up the pieces, that he always had to hurt and always had to suffer.
His forehead hit the tapestry-covered wall across form Sirius' door and he banged his fist against it, letting the other kind of anger come out. Anger at himself. He should have done something. He should have been the one to take up the fight with Bellatrix. He should have been the secret keeper for James and Lily, or suspected Peter at the very least. If he had, well, things would have been different. Anger filtered out of him as the full weight of everything fell onto him and his eyes stung with tears. Slowly he felt them cascade down his cheeks and onto the carpet below. In an instant he knew where to go and he knew his other decision was made. He didn't care how late it was, because the letter had promised that his door would always be open.
Lupin knocked on the heavy wooden door and heard the order to enter. He opened the door to Dumbledore's office and found the old man smiling peacefully back at him. Lupin couldn't help but notice that Dumbledore looked slightly weary, for the first time he actually looked his age.
"Remus. I wasn't expecting you so late," Dumbledore said serenely.
Lupin took a few steps forwards, the beauty and marvel of Dumbledore's office lost on him. When he glanced up at Dumbledore again, he wasn't smiling serenely anymore; in fact he suddenly looked quite concerned as he stared into Lupin's face.
"But it is no trouble," Dumbledore added. "Please, sit."
Lupin followed the request, and collapsed into the chair, after everything that had happened, his exhaustion and his body ache was back, somehow magnified by the argument.
"What is it you would like to discuss Remus?"
Lupin sat on the chair silently and Dumbledore surveyed him. He wondered how many people had sat in Dumbledore's presence after a tragedy. How many had sat in this chair feeling just as wounded as he did in that moment?
"My mission, Albus. I've been thinking that now is the opportune moment for the Order to have a spy in the werewolf camp," Lupin said, half lying about his reasoning.
Dumbledore stared at him in the way that made Lupin want to tell the truth immediately, but he thought of Tonks, he thought of Sirius and he thought of just how much he needed to be away, for the good of everyone. Suddenly lying did not seem a bad thing to do.
"You are correct, this is very much the perfect time for that," Dumbledore said.
It was not a question, it was more of a statement, but Dumbledore was contemplating Lupin, as if he was supposed to say something more. Lupin tried hard not to get lost in the thoughts of Sirius he'd had in that bedroom. The very fresh wounds had once again tore their stitches, but this time he was assured he had no Tonks to hold him together, he had to push through the burning feeling behind his eyes. He was with Dumbledore. At the very least, he still had Dumbledore, a man he trusted and admired higher than any other. Lupin didn't speak, he waited for Dumbledore to speak, more because he was afraid that his voice would break if he did.
"So this is your choice?" Dumbledore finally asked.
"Yes," Lupin replied, his voice starting to crack.
There was another pause as Dumbledore surveyed Lupin from behind his desk, his hands knitted together in front of him. Lupin was amazed at how put together the man truly was, especially for his age. It would have been a stark contrast to how Lupin looked, though he rarely even looked in mirrors anymore.
"Then I will of course stand by your wishes," Dumbledore said, but Lupin knew he wasn't done. "I just desire to know your reasoning. The obvious aside of course."
Lupin looked up at him, he was back to smiling pleasantly, but there was no way he could continue to lie to him. Something about Dumbledore made it impossible. He could feel the stinging behind his eyes intensifying as he thought about his real reasons.
"I just need to leave Albus. I can't stay here anymore, not after– I think we've reached a point where… the Order… is better of without me," Lupin paused, trying to fight the wave in him.
He looked up at Dumbledore again through his tear-blurred vision.
"Please?" Lupin pleaded.
Dumbledore immediately stood and came around the table, placing a comforting hand on Lupin's shoulder. It burned through him, like a warm happy glow, but it couldn't quite battle the darkness inside him. Lupin did not look up at Dumbledore; he stared down into his lap, fighting the tears. He would not cry anymore, he would not allow it.
"I will do as you wish, and allow you to go to them. You can leave as soon as you desire to. But I think it is imperative that you understand Remus, you are not without love just because Sirius is gone," Dumbledore said calmly.
Lupin finally looked up and his eyes instantly found Dumbledore's electric blue ones. There was sadness in them unlike Tonks'; one that Lupin assumed came from experience. Though it had never been discussed, he was sure a man like Dumbledore had encountered a fair amount of loses, in fact Lupin knew of some for certain. Yet sadly the suffering of another man did not help. He didn't even have the heart to believe what Dumbledore had told him, he couldn't understand it at that moment. Lupin continued staring up at him, wishing more in that moment that love was enough; that he didn't have to make a decision based on past experience or fairness, but he did.
By the following evening Lupin was completely alone in Grimmauld Place. Hagrid had come and together the two of them had shared a drink and then proceeded to get Buckbeak out. Hagrid had offered kind words about Sirius and informed Lupin that, just like Dumbledore, his door was always open to him. Yet now Lupin sat in his bedroom. He didn't know exactly why he was still here, but he chose to spend his final night in this house, perhaps because he may never be able to come back. He was sitting up right in his chair, reading, something he wouldn't be able to do very often in the future. There was a quiet knock on the door and Lupin rose to answer it. When he pulled open the door, he saw Tonks, her hair a very fiery red, an indication perhaps of what was to come. She pushed by him and straight into his room without a word. Lupin closed the door and slowly turned around, ready to face what was coming. Tonks was never going to go down without a fight. Her hands were on her hips and her hair seemed to be growing redder and redder as time went by.
"You're leaving?" Tonks said, a mixture of rage and disbelief in her voice.
Lupin didn't say anything. He knew this was it, not just because he was leaving for good the next day, but because of how it felt between the two of them. This was the end.
To be continued…
