Summary: Rachel is HIV-positive. She drops a bottle of her medication one day and it is found by someone at school. The school goes into overdrive trying to educate the students about HIV. Meanwhile, the kids in glee try to figure out whose medication it is since the prescription label had been removed. Requested in the Glee Angst Meme. AU version of events in 1x06, "Vitamin D."
Prompt: Jewel
Life as Rachel Berry knows it is over. She knows this as surely as she knows her own name. She saw the letter from school - the one that her dads tried to hide from her - from Principal Figgins, detailing concern over a found prescription bottle. Upon further inspection, Figgins had discovered that it contained pills commonly used to treat HIV.
Rachel knows all about it.
The bottle is hers.
It must've fallen out of her bag. She was supposed to turn it in to Terri Schuester but Rachel hadn't been able to go through with it. Mrs. Schuester didn't know the first thing about nursing.
Rachel's only saving grace is that she had removed her name from the label, in the girls' bathroom. Her illness was a part of her life, but she didn't need gossiping strangers knowing her private business. Naively, Rachel had thought removing her name would remove all possibility of being outed, so to speak. She hates being the sick girl.
Well, she is the sick girl, and the truth is out now, and Rachel doesn't know the first thing about what to do. Her dads are furious at her carelessness.
"Do you know you could be expelled? Rachel, any medicine you take during the day needs to go through the school nurse. You know this. Honey, you could be charged with a crime," her dad insists. His voice is harsh and kind of scares her.
"Dad, the school nurse was fired, and Mr. Schuester's wife is taking over for her. She's already giving Finn and the other boys pseudoephedrine. I wouldn't trust her with any information I gave her, much less confidential information. I didn't want it getting out," she managed thickly. "I didn't want anyone treating me differently."
"Rachel, if you were worried, why didn't you come to us?" her daddy asks, taking her hand.
"I didn't really think it through…"
"You're darn right you didn't…" her dad scoffs. Then sighs, look at Daddy.
"The school's having an assembly to educate the student body today. If we excuse you, it could raise suspicions."
Rachel nods, understanding. If she wants to keep her own secret, she'll have to pull off the best acting job of her life. Uninformed, uncaring or afraid high school student, listening or not to Principal Figgins detail facts about an illness Rachel lived with every single day. One she had been born with. One that, without a cure, Rachel would die with.
She sees it in her fathers' eyes. The way they look at her like someone precious. Someone treasured. Someone, period.
It means the world to her. That, to them, she is simply Rachel. Nothing more, and certainly, nothing less.
The assembly is excruciating. Listening to Principal Figgins read dispassionate details of a very real illness she lived with every single day. None of the kids were listening. Few cared. Rachel knew by looking that a good portion of the student body hadn't even come to school today.
Unconsciously, she bristled. She thought of others, before her, who had unwillingly paved the way for someone like her. A boy from Illinois. A girl from Nevada. Dealing with discrimination and fear. They fought for equal treatment. For education. They spoke out.
They were advocates. Trailblazers. No one wants this disease, but they, at least, owned having it. Rachel, on the other hand, wants to distance herself from it entirely. She never wants those three little letters attached to her name. She clings hard to her dream of being a star, because the truth, that she might die sooner than her peers is paralyzing. She sticks to a strict schedule, works hard, eats right, and pushes herself to do as much as possible, as fast as possible. Because even though it's 2009, and advances are being made every day, medically…Rachel has to be realistic. The fact is, death is a possibility for her. Any illness she contracts - a cold, the flu, anything - has the potential to land her in the hospital or worse.
She swallows the lump in her throat, and feigns interest in Finn, who isn't paying attention in the slightest.
"Whose do you think it is?" Mercedes asks, and Rachel forces her face into a smile. Forces herself to sit down. To not run from the room.
"I don't know, but it was definitely for treating HIV," Mike offers softly. "Karofsky showed me the bottle. My dad didn't want me to come to school today."
"That's it," Santana announced loudly. "Quinn, I definitely have got to retake that Celibacy Club pledge and mean it this time…"
"Lord Tubbington's making me join a convent," Brittany announced vaguely.
"Wait, you're a nun?" Kurt asks, incredulous.
"Deal with it," she returns and takes a seat.
Is it just Rachel or is no one really touching one another? Her heart aches. Rachel wishes she were brave enough to stand up and add things to Principal Figgins' lecture. Personalize it a little. Make it real, but not so scary. Tell them the important things that were covered and a few more that weren't.
Like, know your status. Get tested. Knowledge is power. It really is. (But also: it's okay to be friends with me.)
Like, have honest conversations with any and all sexual partners so you know theirs as well. (But also: it's okay to swim in a pool with me.)
Like: use caution around all bodily fluids. Wear gloves. Don't share needles. Don't become blood brothers. (But also: It's okay to hold my hand. Just like it's okay to hug me.)
Rachel Berry is many things. (Sick. A coward. Precious. Treasured. Talented.) Brave, it turns out, just isn't one of them.
The End.
Author's Note: I want to thank everyone who takes the time to read this story. It is a subject very close to my heart. I had a friend who was diagnosed with HIV/AIDS. The time between diagnosis and death was very short, but no life is too short to have an impact. Below you will find other sources of information on HIV/AIDS I've read/watched/searched over the years. Many of them are somewhat dated, but the personal perspectives in each offer insight that is unparalleled.
If you would like to learn more about real people with HIV/AIDS, search:
Pedro Zamora (The Real World, San Francisco, 1994) - my earliest education about HIV/AIDS came from this amazing young man. Go MTV's Website to and watch his season of Real World. Be inspired.
Hydeia Broadbent (HIV/AIDS activist, who was born HIV-positive in 1984 and not expected to live past age 5.) Today, she is 28 and continues to inspire the world. Check out her Twitter, and her Website for more information. I'd also recommend searching her on YouTube.
DVDs:
RENT - Live on Broadway (1996 musical by Jonathan Larson)
RENT the film (2005 movie adaptation of the musical)
Books:
It Happened to Nancy - by: An Anonymous Teenager
You Get Past the Tears - by: Patricia Broadbent and Hydeia Broadbent
