PART 1

I was cleaning the kitchen, mother was coming back from work soon, and as usual I wanted the house to be spot-less when she got home. She worked every single day, from dawn to dust since father got killed. She was always tired but never showed it, always smiled. I had inherited her hair and snow-white skin, my eyes she said where my father's, even though I have no recollection of what he looked like.

We lived in a small village. We weren't warriors, but had no need to be. Through my whole life all I had ever seen was peace, it was until we left our village that misfortune would fall on us, like with my father. He left one early-spring afternoon to search for a better job to provide more for mother and I, and he never came back. I knew the world could be bad, but in my little village, close to mother, and where everyone treated each other with love and care I felt safe.

I was nineteen, I remember. She walked in with an abnormality large smile on her face, even for her, and handed me a science book, the arts and misteries of the universe. I hugged her tight, and realized the reason of her working a lot more during that season. She knew I loved to read, after school, and after finishing my duties, I would stay up all night re-reading books I had read a hundred times already, trying to finding something new in them. Books were expensive back then, especially for us, so the act of getting a new one made me the happiest person in the world.

I remember I didn't sleep that night, and the next day after school I went straight to find him, the one that I owed everything to. He was the Spiritual Leader of our village, not only that but he was also our school teacher, advice-giver, and problem-solver. I had known him all my life. He's the one that taught me how to read, I would beg him to stay with me after class and teach me more. We would stay until late, sometimes until night, being with him was so peaceful and the way he spoke of life made me smile at the world.

I showed him my new book that day, he explained a few things I didn't understand as I sat in his lap the way he had been asking me to for a while now. His words were wisdom, he was so kind and so gentle, and he smiled like the sun, and he believed in the rights of life for even the smallest of creatures, and he taught me to love and respect others, and he was so perfect in my eyes.

And then he asked me to go with him into the forest one day. We were supposed to go search for medicinal plants, I was thrilled, more learning. My mother agreed, but something was different that day, she look worried as if she really didn't want me to go, she had a feeling of what was coming. Mothers really are such mysterious things. I insisted on going, and he assured her we would be back home within two days, her face was worried as I walked out that night.

"Do you believe things happen for a reason?" he asked me as we layed next to each other under the moonlight at our camping site. The fire had already turned off and I could see purples and blues and crystals in the sky.

"Of course Leader, we are all connected in the universe. Not one thing happens that doesn't have a reason."

I saw him clinch his fist as he said, "I can't take this anymore." I worried, of course I did. My Leader and role model and the closest thing I had to a friend looked troubled. "In a perfect world we could get married," he spoke. I felt weird, had no idea what was about to happen. He grabbed me, "But we can't. I am supposed to be holy, but you insist on corrupt me."

"Leader?" I asked, "What is it? Why are you telling me this?"

"You're doing it on purpose, aren't you? The way you look at me, the way you smile, the way you always ask to stay after class, the way you sit on my lap everyday. You want to taint me , don't you?" I tried to pull away. "We can do it here, we can come as often as we can to fill each other up, and then go back to the village as if nothing's happened," he pulled me to him and tried to kiss me, I picked up both hands defensively, and pulled away.

"No! What are you doing?" I questioned. I felt weird, very weird.

"Stop it Kurama, I know you want to," he pushed me down to the floor, I tried to push him off, I tried, I tried, and then I felt his fist fall in my face. And he cursed me, and beat me, and cried while he did it.

He tried to undress me, and even bloody and half dead I still fought back, at an opened chance I tried to run, but he yanked me back by the hair earning me a few more blows to the head. It stung, and I couldn't keep my eyes open, and my ears were ringing, and my tears wouldn't stop. He tied me up with some weeds, like an animal, like if I was nothing, and I was nothing at that time. They were full of thorns and cut into my wrists, and it hurt and I cried, and I hated the universe for allowing this to happen. I wondered if it was even real, because there was no way that my teacher, my Leader, the most righteous man I knew, could be doing something like this.

He raped me, and the whole time he apologized for doing it, and in my innocence I felt bad for him.

When he finished he threw me to the side like garbage, my hands still tied behind my back, my torn insides and beaten body sent me on a trance were I really thought I was dying, but death soon became a very real thing. He got a knife then, and walked to me. He apologized again while explaining he couldn't let me live after what happened, what if I spoke? What if I told on him?

"Teacher... Teacher please," I begged, sobbing in pain and fear, but he didn't care, he wasn't the person I knew. He let the knife fall towards me and the last bit of strength I had left materialized to help me survive. The weeds that he used to tie me up came to life as a part of me, and slashed his body in seven different pieces. Yes, seven, I counted.

I killed him.

I killed my teacher.

I stayed there the whole night, limbs and blood scattered around me. Thinking... Thinking... I was thinking. I was trying to think.

At dawn I searched for water. I cleaned my self fully all the while thinking... I was thinking... I was thinking I just killed my teacher for raping me. I cut him into seven different pieces. My teacher raped me because he couldn't stop himself, he felt bad but couldn't control himself... In a perfect world, my teacher wanted to marry me. My teacher couldn't control... Couldn't stop.

I realized something then. I had something that made the most kind and caring and loving person I knew turn into a beast. I had something that made him go crazy. I had a special power.

I went back home until my bruises went away, invented a wolf story that everyone believed. Everyone except my mother, she knew something happened. After that day, nothing was the same.

The dream leaves just like it came, with a tilt of the world. I sit up on the bed and hold my hands to my face. Why did I dream that? It's been so long... "In a perfect world we could get married." I asked Touya to marry me yesterday, maybe that word triggered the memory. That's what I get for being foolish.

After getting ready, I make my way to meet with Mukuro and Hiei. We are supposed to discuss battle strategies today and make last minute changes- if any- since the battle is in three days. Touya is already here, and I ignore Mukuro's little comment about her royal highness (meaning me) making everyone wait until I felt like rolling out of bed.

She goes on about her army: commanders here, soldiers there, all the while I'm focused on the way Touya is chewing at his bottom lip, his back pressed against the bone-made-wall, until she says something that cuts through my brain."About seven-hundred," she says it like it's nothing, like they themselves couldn't kill her. "They'll just stand there, there's no need for them to fight unless Yomi comes up with a super attack out of nowhere."

"His strongest fighter right now is Zein, and frankly he is the only one I see worth my time," Hiei adds.

"We can't let our guard down though, Yomi has been known for surprises. That's why I wanted his little lover to stay over there with him for as long as possible."

"He wasn't going to say anything else," Hiei stops her rant. "Besides, I find it very hard for him to get seven hundred S class soldiers to stand by him in the next few days."

Seven Hundred.

"Still," Mukuro continues, "If he was able to get eighty, I wouldn't be surprised if he has more. There's a lot of strong soldiers in this world, the question is, which ones would want to join him? The ones that believe in his ideals? Friends? Ones he's helped in the past?"

"We still have those spies searching."

Duen. No! The feelings threaten to return, but I block them out. As if I don't have enough things to worry about without an inner civil war.

"If he does manage though I'll have to give him props. I may despise him, but I know when to admit someone is worth it, and Yomi certainly is worth my time. He's gotten out of tough situations before, let's see how he manages to get out of this one. It's either that or he dies," Mukuro continues.

"You almost sound fond of him," I speak.

"Jealous?" She asks, turning her head slightly to the side. "Tell me Kurama, why couldn't it be him? I've heard of you being with others. What was the name of that one famous one you had for quite a long time?" she takes a finger to her bottom lip, pretending to think, "Oh, I remember. Kuronue, isn't it? What did Kuronue have that Yomi didn't? Getting closer to our time, what does Touya have that he doesn't? You're kind off aiming at the lower side of the ladder with both of those-"

"Do you ever shut your-" I walk in her direction, I want to rip her head off. Don't touch Kuronue's name. Don't do it!

"Both of you be quiet. It is obvious that you don't like each other, no need to bring it up all the time," Hiei interrupts.

"You're the one that wanted him here," she answers with a sharp voice.

"And here he will stay," Hiei confirms, matching the sharpness of her voice with a sharpness of his own.

She turns to Hiei angry, I see it in her eye. Her whole face is a dead giveaway, and I love to see her this way.

PART 2

We hunt again in the middle of the day, this time he is the one that does the killing while I make the fire. We sit under large trees and crisp shadows, "So when is our wedding?" I begin, "it doesn't have to be big-"

"You're talking about that again?" he rolls his eyes looking annoyed, he most likely is. The wind blushes aqua out of his face.

"It doesn't even have to be for real," he turns to me, "We can just pretend."

"Pretend what?" He asks, louder than usual. This subject must really be getting to him.

"Pretend it's real," I answer with all normality, taking a bite out of the leg of the beast he just killed. When I'm done chewing I continue, "We can perform the ceremony-"

"Perform?" He's getting mad.

"Allow people to congratulate us, maybe have a little celebration."

"For what?" He's furious.

"Just to know what it's like," I lower my head, my voice is softer than usual. I don't know what it is, but I feel strange.

"Why are you talking like that? You know, lately you've been acting different, you're..." his eyebrows frown and his face turns to the pitch of horror. "Why?" He asks, water building in his eyes. "It's because you ate him."

I look up at him eyes wide open, coming to a realization. It is true, this isn't me. The way I felt when I found out about Duen, the way I've been acting with Touya, this feeling of not wanting to be alone, feeling hopeless; we are melting into one. I am inheriting some of his traits, some of his feelings. We are becoming one person.

Touya stands, "You're a monster. A parasite. A virus." Something is coming up my stomach with his worlds, but I swallow it back.

"Yes I am all that, but yet you're still here with me, so what does that make you?"

"I should have snapped my own neck when I had the chance."

I stand too. I don't like this looking-up-at-people thing, "No one is lucky enough to die in this game. You have to stay alive, keep breathing, and keep feeling. Isn't that funny?" I chuckle, "When you think about it, you can't kill me because I am Shuichi's only way to come back, Yomi can't kill me for the same thing, yet Yomi had Shuichi but at the same time wanted Zein, who is also a coward and won't kill himself because he is frightened to live in a plane where Yomi doesn't exist, and Yomi won't kill you because he knows you are his direct connection to me, who is his only connection to- well you know the rest. I just think this whole thing is so funny."

"You think it's funny?! You think it's funny to be put in a situation where your only way out is death, and you can't even kill yourself because you don't have the luxury to die yet?! And all because of one person's manipulations!"

"Yeah, I think it's amusing."

"You're sick."

"You have no idea how sick and twisted I can be. But you like it, don't you?" You want to taint me, don't you. "You are all the same."

I run into the forest. I run and run and keep running. I run for what feels like hours, I run away from him, and from the war, but the feelings remain. The feelings are getting sowed into my vessels, the feelings are inside of me. Shuichi is inside of me.

PART 3 (Touya's PVO)

I go back to the palace a few hours later, he must be back by now, but as much as I want to avoiding him it's impossible. Walking into the main gate, Hiei encounters me, jumping from out of nowhere as appear to be his trait mark.

"Where's Kurama?" He asks clear, and deep, but with a small hint of worry that perks me up.

"Kurama?" I question, "I thought he would be here. He left about three hours ago, I stayed behind-"

"YOU IDIOT!" He roars, "You are telling me you left him alone? Right now, with the way things are?"

"They weren't together?" Mukuro is here too, just as unexpected.

"The fucking idiot left him alone!" Hiei says nothing more. He takes off sprinting faster than my eyes can catch, with Mukuro tight on his tail.

What have I done? I left him alone knowing that Yomi... How could I have been so stupid? Why didn't I think? We have to find him.

PART 4

I don't know where I am. If I've every wondered these lands it was most likely thousands of years ago. Life is such a curious thing, somehow we always end up where we started. I find a river and wash my face with it's crystal clear water, nothing like human world, that's a good thing. I take off my shirt and consider swimming care-free like I use to so long ago, but a wave of nausea interrupts my actions.

It comes from out of nowhere. I feel like throwing up, my stomach is spinning. I take a step to the right, trying to achieve balance, but the world spins under my feet. What is going on? Is it Shuichi? No. I doesn't feel like Shuichi, it feels like... Like...-the connection comes quick- like I'm traveling through a portal, but the realization doesn't come quick enough. I try to run, I think I manage a few steps, but something lifts me in the air, a force, a power, and suddenly I am being pulled through the forest, through trees and rocks, I am being dragged like a ragged doll through space, a suction sucking me away.

I lower my mental defenses.

HIEI!

I call for Hiei, I scream for Hiei.

"KURAMA, WHERE ARE YOU?"

"HIEI!"

"I'm coming to get you! Don't worry!"

I am being sucked into a vacuum, body flying in thin air, bumping into trees and anything else that is in the way, until I get sucked up to the sky. I see it now, a bird made of fire, being ridden by two demons. I can't make out who they are, don't think I've seen them before. I fight against the force, I try with all I have, but eventually end up in their arms.

I shake them off, and immediately one of them hits the back of my head with so much force, I'm surprised it didn't roll off, "Don't even try it with us fox, we have orders to get you there, no restrictions on how."

I'm fast enough to grab a knife one of them has hanging from their waist, but not fast enough to punch it though my neck, and I feel my last chance of death is slipping through my fingers, as they take it away.

I feel Hiei coming, I know he's coming, but he's too late. After my attempt at suicide, they tie me up, blind fold me, and hold my tongue with tight ropes, all while flying away in such a beautiful, magical Phoenix. I always wanted to ride one, to bad this one is taking me to something way worst than death.

PART 5 (Touya's PVO)

"ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?" Hiei's rasp voice controls the forest. "Do you see what you've done?"

"I didn't know-" I truly didn't. I thought he was save here. I didn't think Yomi would go this far.

"You didn't know that Yomi was going to try to get him back? You didn't know he was in danger?!" He asks sarcastically. "You are so lucky he might survive this because if his death was imminent I would be slashing your neck right now," Hiei unleashes his katana and presses it against my neck, but doesn't go though.

"Stop it Hiei," Mukuro orders.

"You better pray for his well being," He retrieves the katana and shoves me away. "I should have known better than to not keep an eye on him. I wanted to give you two privacy in case you both wanted to-" he stops his sentence, "and this is what happens."

"What are we going to do? We have to go get him."

"Yes, lets all just hold hands and sprint into the sunset to rescue our whore -of-a-friend for getting in trouble for not being able to keep his legs closed."

"This isn't the time Mukuro!" Hiei yells.

"Well it's the truth. He should have known better than to wonder off in the first place, he was safe in the castle but he left."

"Lets not worry about that right now, just WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?" I demand.

"Nothing! Don't you understand? We can't DO anything," She answers. "The battle is scheduled until two days from now, if we attack now we are violating the agreement. And if we storm into the castle without the army we are as good as dead."

"So we're supposed to just stand here with our arms crossed?"

"I wouldn't be talking, this is all because of you!" Hiei reproaches.

"Shut up Hiei, we both know this isn't his fault. You're just blinded by the devotion you have for that tramp! Why is that? Does he do favors for you too?"

There's a silence, I thought Hiei would be infuriated, instead he looks somehow disappointed. "You're so blinded by your jealousy and lack of self-esteem, I can't even look at you."

"And why do think that is? You don't look at me the way you look at him," I've never seen Mukuro like this, never thought it would be possible to see her like this.

"I am here, not there, do you not see that?" Hiei, states. "You're an idiot, just like everybody else." He takes off in the opposite direction of Mukuro's Land.

"Wait, Hiei," she calls for him.

"I'm going to go find him, you two do whatever you want."

Without a second thought, I follow.

PART 6

I try to open my eyes, my whole body is sore, my muscles heavy, and realize I can't because I am still blind forded. I hear noises, so many noises, but none that are familiar. I try to move, but I am being held in place by what feel like ropes and ties, my tongue and mouth are being held with gauzes, I'm guessing as insurance I won't bite my tongue since my last attempt at suicide. I hear a steady beep, from a machine maybe, and after a few seconds connect it to a heart monitor. I am being held for experimenting, he is going to try to get Shuichi out.

"Remove the gauze from his mouth, I need to speak to him," I hear his voice but he isn't in the room, maybe through a speaker. Hands remove the gauze from my mouth and I wince at the ability to move it. It's an euphoric relaxation. I rest my head back, hitting a wall, I am being held standing, cuffed and chained and pinned to the walls like a room decoration. I am able to move my neck, but nothing else, my legs and arms don't move an inch.

"Kurama," He speaks. "Things don't have to be this way. Tell us what you know and we will make things easier. You don't have to go through all of this."

"I don't know what you're talking about! Let me go!"

"Tell me how to get Shuichi out. This isn't your body. Your time is up, you died."

"Go fuck yourself."

"The way things are you have two choices: one, you tell me how to bring him back and your suffering ends now, or two, we'll experiment, and experiment, and experiment, until we get it right, and we both know what experimenting can do to a person."

"You don't scare me Yomi. Either way you'll be dead in two days, and I doubt you'll be able to get Shuichi back by then. You can't keep me here longer than that."

"Very well then, you may begin."

There's foot steps and someone is rubbing a tiny spot in my back with alcohol, and the needle goes in. First there is nothing, but then I get this undescribable need to hurl. The monitor's beeps are slightly faster, and everything is spinning, and I want to throw up by I hold it, I think of other things, I hold it, and a voice speaks, "The antidote, this one didn't do anything."

There's another rub in my back and another needle just below the first one, and then the nausea leaves, I can breath without wanting to throw it out, I relax a little. This is experimenting. I can live through this, I will live through this.

They wait for about fifteen minutes, I count, and perform the same routine again. Another drug, again they look for reactions for about eight minutes, but since I once again keep everything inside, give me the antidote and wait another fifteen to try another one.

I can endure this, I know I can. No matter what I feel, pain, numbness, nausea, headaches, burning, no matter what I won't give them anything. If I don't show any adverse reactions they'll never be able to determine what drugs are having the right effect on me and which ones are way off. This way it may take weeks for him to get an answer, and by then, his bones will be rotting in hell.

Another drug, and immediately my head burns. My brain itself is melting, my organs are melting from inside, my heart speeds a little even though I try to control it, and I hear whoever is in this room with me, writing something down by hand into paper, possibly my heart's reaction, since it's the only one they're getting. 58... 59... 8 minutes, and the antidote comes in and the burning stops, and I am proud I was able to endure that.

PART 7 (Yomi's PVO)

The door to the secret room opens, and in comes the doctor Zein had just informed me he'd see walk out of Kurama's dungeon room through the cameras. "He isn't showing any reactions, my Lord."

"I know," I agree, Zein standing by my side. I don't know how I dragged him into this. He helped me unite fifteen elite demon doctors and fifteen elite human doctors, who he was able to convince to help through offering riches and favors.

"The thing is that without the reactions," the demon doctor continues, "we can't tell if the drugs are working, or if they are at least close to working or not. We could be killing him and he won't tell us, and the heart monitor isn't much help if he is able to control his heart beat."

"Which he is," I assure him. Yoko is so interesting. "Don't worry, I'll take care of this," I make my way out.

"Yomi, what is it?" Zein's voice is different, it's getting duller and duller with each passing second. Sometimes I think he might collapse where he stands.

"Don't worry, you stay here and take care of things until I come back. For now, don't administer any more drugs."

PART 8 (Zein's PVO)

I rub my eyes trying to keep myself awake and stare at the screen, I can't believe this is Yoko, the beautiful, strong, and proud person that I saw just a few days ago, now captured and beaten and drugged, and tied by hands and feet. I dislike him, but this doesn't bring me happiness, how can anybody live like this? This isn't the way life was meant to be.

As soon as Yoko left, Yomi told me of his plan to try to get Shuichi back, we just had to be prepared and wait for an opportunity. We gathered some of the best doctors and with Suzuka working on the antidote, I'm sure we can succeed, but then what? What is all this leading too? Where will it end? And the biggest question, what am I still doing here?

I see Yomi enter the room through the screen, and order the doctors and guards to leave. I raise off my chair, drawn by curiosity, what is going to happen?

Yomi steps into Yoko's comfort zone, close enough to feel each other without touching, and the annoying pain on my chest is present again. I wish I could rip it out and throw it in the trash can. "You just love making everything impossible don't you?" Yomi asks in his bedroom voice, and I want to rip my ears out and I wish I could stop watching, but I can't. I just love putting myself through this pain. I'm an idiot.

"I'm just trying to survive," Yoko answers, short of breath, I'm assuming by the effect of all the medications.

Yomi takes a deep breath, and speaks as if reading a story out of a book,"There was once a fox who fell in love with a bat, too bad the bat died soon after, but out of their love remained a... pendant."

What is he talking about? I unconsciously get closer to the screen.

Yoko's face tilts in Yomi's direction, and even though half his face is covered with gauzes and blindfolds, I see something I've never seen before, not in Yoko... I see... Fire.

"You son of a bitch," Yoko speaks, his voice is different. As if a sort of deity washed over him and left his voice in his place: ice cold, stong, determined, feared.

"Glad to finally have your attention." Yomi walks around him in a circle, speaking, "Lets make a deal," He grabs Yoko's blindfolds from the back of his head and rips them off, taking with them some stands of hair. Yoko's head pulls back, but no sign of pain is showed, if anything his eyes now reveal nothing but power and strength and fire. Yomi stands in front of him now, and pulls something out of the pocket of his pants. "The signs and symptoms of whatever medication you are given, for this treasure of true love."

Yoko looks dumbfounded as Yomi lets the pendant roll down Yoko's view. It doesn't look fancy, a purple-ish stone hanging like a pendulum. "I should have known it was you!" Yoko spits.

"No, no, don't confuse things. As crazy as I was about you back then I really had nothing to do with your lovers death, not that it really matters to me anyways. However, a merchant came one day and offered to sell it to me," Yomi smiles, "With the way I was back then, I actually payed a lot of riches just for this cheap thing. People take advantage once they know you want something, you know?"

Yomi lowers himself to Kurama's face, that is still fire, and ice, and angry, and so full of fight, "So what is it going to be? Are you going to speak, or should I tie this around my neck and call it a day?"

"Don't you dare!" Yoko growls, and Yomi smiles, and I have no idea what is going on.

Author's note: First thank you so much for reading after so long, it really means a lot to me. I want to apologize for TYPOS, I really have so little time to write this :/ My next break is in about six weeks! ughhh... I can't wait to see what happens next xD As soon as I step out of school I will be writing so please wait for me :) Bye-bye!