Chapter 49
Until Tomorrow
(Same day)
Severus had a chocolate ring around his mouth. He was finishing the last bits of his waffle cone in a sticky mess.
After he finished I took him into the bathroom and sat him on the counter as I cleaned his face and hands.
"You made such a mess," I told him as I tried to rub some of the chocolate stains off his sweater with little success. He just grinned up at me happily, swinging his legs.
Once he was clean and we were back outside, we could see the setting sun just wading weightlessly in Bellingham bay. The sky along the water was flaming pinks and oranges and the sky above was a rich indigo.
"Shall we walk towards the water?" I suggested to Severus.
"Okay Mommy," he said. He grabbed my hand as we crossed the street. Once on the sidewalk again, Severus let go and ran a head.
"Severus," I called after him, "Don't go to far." I quickened my speed. Severus looked back at me playfully and began to run full speed down the hill towards the water. "Severus," I said now running after him. I stumbled a bit as I began to lose control of my legs and the hill's slope drove them into full sprint.
"Faster Mommy!" Severus called behind him.
"Severus, careful," I cried.
The slope of the hill began to level out and my legs wobbled as my pace slowed.
Severus was stopped at the bottom of the hill. He waited until I got within a foot of him and then he took off around the corner of the water front shops.
I found him on the other side, halfway down the boardwalk, gazing into the window of a shop.
"Mommy!" cried Severus. "Come look!"
"Severus Tiberius Snape," I said sternly. "Don't just run off like that again."
Severus was not paying attention, but continued peering into the shop.
I walked over to see what it was that caught his interest.
In the window three large paintings were displayed. To the left, the smallest of the three was a scenic autumn drive with tall twisting trees with red, yellow and orange leaves. A black horse stood stoically in the distance, gazing knowingly into the viewer's eyes.
To the far right of the display was a slightly larger canvas than the first. This painting depicted the hands of an aged couple, tightly grasped around each other, resting at the sides of their thighs. They were both dressed and navy. The picture only depicted the midriffs for the couple but I could tell the two were happy. The detail put into their ivory, wrinkled hands and the tight shape of the couples grasp was enough to tell a perfect story.
But my favorite picture was the one in the middle it was on the largest canvas and it was an exact replica of the Bellingham sunset. The water seemed to move as I looked at the stationary painting. The painted sun seemed to warm my face. It was as if I was gazing into a mirror at the scenery behind me, as if the painter had captured a star and embedded it into the fabric of the canvas.
The sign above the store simply read: Art Gallery.
"Let's go in, Mommy," said Severus grabbing my hand and pulling me towards the door.
"Is it open?" I asked, looking around for a sign. The store appeared to be empty and there was a sense of neglect around the gallery, but the lights were on.
I walked over to the glass door and pushed. It opened.
There was no bell or anything on the door alerting the owner that there were customers.
The store seemed to be deserted.
"Hello?" I said. There was no answer.
Severus slipped inside.
"Sev," I said as I walked in too.
"Can I look at the pictures, Mommy?" he asked eagerly. I looked around skeptically. The lights were not bright, not the atmosphere one would expect from an art gallery.
"Yes," I said timidly. "Stay where I can see you and don't touch anything, okay?"
"Okay, Mommy," Severus said cheerfully.
Almost at once he strolled around the corner, out of sight.
I let out a sigh, but decided the gallery was not large, so there was not much trouble he could get into.
The room seemed to be loud and crowded, even though the only apparent life in the room was Severus and me. The gallery was fairly small. A lone wall (which Severus had disappeared behind) stood in the middle of the room and it was covered top to bottom in variously sized paintings. And all around the room there were paintings resting of easels placed sporadically, making the space tight.
I was amazed by this artist attention to detail. I kept turning my head in every direction trying to catch all the action around me. The paintings were stationary yet they were alive, like ones at Hogwarts. The characters that lived behind there canvas walls seemed to speak and have personalities and the sceneries seemed to pull me in until I was lost from reality.
I didn't know if I had been adventuring in these paintings minutes or hours, maybe days.
I tore myself away and looked out the window. The sun had completely sunk into the bay, only a yellow spot under the water told me where it was hiding.
I was about to call for Severus to tell him it was time to go home, when I saw it.
A painting in the very far corner of the room called to me and seemed to pull me towards it. In seconds without moving an inch it seemed I was facing it.
The girl's face was right up to the canvas. Her skin was pale, yet she blushed at me and she had a few light freckles under her wide blue eyes; her long black hair spilled forward almost falling out of the painting.
She was beautiful, too beautiful and she seemed to haunt me as I looked upon her. Her blue eyes were the force of tempest waves, trying to drown me.
I broke away from her gaze and confirmed my fear as I, for the first time, read the artist's signature in the right hand corner. Tangled within the girl's black hair were small scratched in white initials: D.W.H.
"Oh no," I panicked.
I motioned to move and find Severus so that we could leave this gallery, this town, but then I felt a presence behind me and my body went stiff as a board.
"Do you like the painting," said a very familiar voice, which set my heart racing.
"No," I breathed.
"I don't like it much either," said the voice bitterly. "I could never get it quite right."
I was silent. I could almost hear my mind trying to devise an escape plan. "You should get rid of this painting," I murmured.
"Turn around," ordered the voice roughly. "Turn around and look at me."
I cast my eyes downward and shook my head.
I then felt two strong yet shaking hands on my shoulders. I suddenly was spun around forcefully.
My body quivered but I continued to cast my eyes to the floor, letting my black hair fall forward.
"Look at me," hissed the voice. "For God sake, look at me."
I felt powerless, powerless against the warm hands on my shoulders, the lyrical voice and the intoxicating aroma coming from the very pores of the speaker, powerless as if nothing had changed.
I lifted my chin and met my blue eyes with the brilliant green ones that belonged to David Harper.
David pulled away from me as if in shock, yet he did not release his grasp on me, instead held me tighter.
He was silent. His lips were set in a tight line, his green eyes narrowed. He seemed paler and thinner, his sand curls hung low and he had light facial hair as if he had neglected to shave for a few weeks.
"I can hear your breathing," he said in straight tone. "I can feel your body shake under my hands." He lifted one hand from my shoulder and slightly touched my cheek. "You are warm," He pointed out. He moved his hand to my neck. "And you have a pulse." He pause a moment and replaced his grasp on me. "I heard you speak. You seem alive to me."
"I am alive," I said, tears pouring quietly from my eyes.
"I have been hearing you say that to me for years in my mind," he said, his expression was a cross between incredible pain and anger. "Though, it has never felt as real as it does now."
"It is real," I wept.
"How?" he asked.
"I never died," I said hurriedly. "I have been part of a witness protection program," I invented.
He let go of my shoulder and took a few steps back. He looked away from me and then looked back to see if I would disappear.
When I didn't he clenched his fists and wearing the same strange expression I was unsure if he was going to cry or yell.
"The graveyard, about five years ago?" David asked through clenched teeth. "Real or not real?"
"Real," I whispered.
"God dammit, Alex!" he shouted.
I quickly wiped my eyes. "What?" I asked instantly angry back. Was he really going to yell at me right now?
"You put everyone through shit!" he yelled.
"I put everyone through shit?" I shouted back. "What about all the crap I went through? My family was murdered and I had to leave everyone I loved, while they thought I was dead! So it is not like I was on vacation!"
David's face softened momentary but then he grew angry again. "What was that stunt you pulled in the cemetery? What do you think I thought when I saw you? You we supposed to be dead and I saw you!"
"Well I am so sorry!" I said sarcastically, "Sorry I disappointed you!"
He ignored my last statement. "I thought I lost my mind that's what I thought!" David yelled. "I go to a shrink because I thought I saw a dead girl! I am a recovering alcoholic!"
"I didn't tell you to be a drunk or see a shrink," I hissed at him.
"You weren't around to tell me not to!" was David's argument.
"What the hell is wrong with you!" I said mercilessly. "Why didn't you just get over it like a normal person?"
David's eyes flashed red and I could feel the heat of his anger radiating off him. He stepped towards me and I stepped back, but he grabbed me by the shoulders again and pulled me towards him. Then without warning he was kissing me. Moving one hand on my back and one in my hair he pushed my towards him as if he could not get close enough. My hands were limp at my side and my balance depended completely on David's strength but my lips moved with his perfectly as if we had done this a thousand times.
My heart raced as hundreds of confused and wonderful feelings rose to the surface. I was gone out of this life; I was pure and whole again; I was home at last.
No, I thought, I cannot be thinking like this. Everything had changed I am not as I was and I have a son.
I found my arms again and used them to push myself away from David with as much force as I could.
I stumbled backwards as we broke apart. David reached out to help steady me, but I narrowly avoided his touch.
He looked at me, his beautiful green eyes wide, I know he felt what I felt and though he was steady his face was flushed and his hands were shaking.
Angry tears fell from my eyes. How dare he?
I had decided years ago that I would never try to contact anyone from my old life. I was not the same as I was. I was not innocent; I was not pure or whole. I was tainted and damaged. I had seen too much and lost too many people and now I had a son. It was not just about me anymore. I had a child and with going back to people I once knew questions would arise about Severus and his parentage. For his safety I had chosen to stay away. But now I had an almost over powering need to come back to the world I once knew. I knew what I was missing and now I would have to live my life longing for it in vain.
I raised my hand to slap David across the face as hard as I possibly could, but only inches from his cheek he caught my wrist and then reached for the other one so that my hands were tied in front of me. I fought against him but he was too strong.
"When I let go of your arms you can hit me all you like," said David fervently. "You can call me any cruel name you can think of. Yell any swear word but don't you dare run away from me. Don't you even think about it."
I opened my mouth to scream at him or possibly bite him when I heard tiny footsteps running towards me.
"Mommy!" Severus cried.
David let go of my hands as if they were made of hot iron and backed away, rubbing his palm over his temp, with a look of disgust on his face.
Severus looked up at me fearfully. Tears still crawled down my cheeks and I was shaking.
"Mommy, what's wrong," Severus said a sob creeping into his voice.
I quickly wiped my eyes. "Nothing, sweetheart," I said my voice shaking; "I'm fine."
Severus threw a tearful glare at David and then held his arms up like a toddler wanting to be held.
I took him into my arms and he cried on my shoulder.
"Hush, my love," I said in his ear. "Everything is fine."
Severus shook his head into my shoulder. I set him down again and knelt at his eye level. I brushed away his tears with my thumb and he caught one of my escaped tears with his pointer finger.
"Who is he?" Severus asked heatedly without looking at David.
I gently turned Severus around to look at David. "This is Mr. Harper," I said stoically, "the artist; he painted all these paintings, Severus."
Severus's face softened slightly towards David upon hearing that he was the creator of all these beautiful works, but he still eyed him skeptically.
David walked a half a step closer and then bent to shake hands with my son.
Severus looked at me before grabbing David's hand. I nodded indication that it was okay. So Severus grasped hands with the artist but almost immediately pulled away and ran behind me. I stood and David straightened up.
"What is your name?" David asked Severus softly.
"His name is Severus," I answered coldly. David looked up at me briefly but then looked back down at my son.
"That is a nice name," David said coldly. "Are you named after your father?"
I opened my mouth to retort, but Severus beat me to it.
"I'm named after my cousin," Severus told David, "I don't have a father, but I am not a test tube baby," he added.
The corners of David's mouth twitched under his beard as if he was about to smile but he managed to keep his face straight and simply nodded at Severus's remark.
David looked at me again. "I see a ring on your finger but it's not on your left hand," he hissed. He was referring to the gold ruby ring that had been a Christmas present many years previous. "If you were married you would be in a lot of trouble," and he smirked devilishly at me.
My jaw dropped in outrage and my eyebrows knit together.
David directed his attention toward Severus again. "You know I knew your mom when she was a little girl."
Severus looked at David with amazement then looked at me. "Is this true, Mommy?" he asked.
"Severus we need to go home," I said sternly.
Severus's eyes caught the haunting painting of the girl. "Mommy," He said to himself. He too seemed to dislike it.
David turned the painting around on its easel.
"Your mom and I used to ride bikes on our street together and make mud pies together," David said looking me straight in the eye. Severus just listened to the story quietly and curiously.
"We need to leave," I said through clenched teeth.
"And you helped me with my English homework; taught me to like Shakespeare," David smiled.
"Stop it," I muttered defenselessly.
"You came to all my football games," He reminded me.
"Don't," I begged.
"You were the first one to see my paintings," he whispered passionately.
"This is not the time," I hissed.
"I missed the time," David said nearly inaudibly. "Your right," he said completely changing tones. He glanced down at Severus and then at me again.
"Have dinner with me tomorrow," David said with a forced grin on his bearded face.
Severus grabbed my hand and was swinging it back and forth, gazing up at David as if trying to decide if he liked him or not.
"I can't," I said harshly, nodding towards Severus.
"The invitation was extended to both of you, Alex," David said my name with almost mocking emphases as if we were children.
"We're busy, David," I mimicked him.
"I don't think you are," he replied.
I started for the door, tugging Severus along.
David moved in front of us with his arms spread wide. "I will not let you leave until you promise to have dinner with me tomorrow night at, hmm, let's say 5:30."
"Um, let me think for a minute," I said sarcastically. "No."
Severus giggled at my side. David and I both looked down at him and his cheeks reddened.
"Mommy," he said tugging on my hand.
"What, Sev?" I said throwing a dirty look at David.
"We should have dinner with him, Mommy," Severus whispered loudly. He had evidently decided to like David as everyone always did. "We should."
"See," said David childishly, pleased as if he had won some game, but he did win. David knew I could give my son no reasonable explanation as to why I wouldn't have dinner with him.
I was trapped. I inhaled sharply. "Fine," I said shortly. "Now let us through."
"Patience," said David jokingly. "I have to give you my address first."
"You're going to cook?" I asked with a scowl.
"I am a starving artist," David said, "I cannot afford to take you out for dinner. We will be having top ramen for dinner, followed by top ramen for desert."
He grinned at me. I did not smile back yet it took effort.
"Don't move," David said seriously.
David walked away shortly and came jogging back with a piece of paper and pen. He seemed relieved upon his return to see that I was still there. He was right to think that I might flee; it crossed my mind.
"Here," he said starting to hand me the paper in which he had scribbled his address on, but at the last possible moment he pulled it away from me and handed it to Severus. "Make sure your mommy doesn't lose this," David told Severus kindly.
Severus seemed thrilled to be entrusted with such a large responsibility and held the paper tightly in his hands.
"Bye," I said coldly.
"See you both tomorrow at 5:30," said David proudly.
I started for the door again.
David grabbed my wrist. "Promise me that you are not going to disappear," he whispered hurriedly in my ear. "Promise me."
My heart thumped violently in my chest. Only seconds before my brain was devising a plan to be in Australia by tomorrow afternoon, but at his touch everything was forgotten. My lips utter the words that I would not and could not break. "I promise."
David seemed satisfied and let me go until tomorrow.
