Chapter 53

The seven of them stood silently round the kitchen staring, almost unblinkingly, at the pair. Jo's full power had returned now and Crovell knew none of them could say she looked worse for it. As for his feelings for her, despite her arrogant indiscretion, they hadn't changed. He still needed her and even complete and utter exile by her wouldn't change that. After a long period of silence, his father took a deep breath and looked as though he was about to say something. Before he did, however, he closed his mouth again. The silence continued and Arados's unshifting glare was beginning to make Crovell more than a little uncomfortable. If they were going to be exiled, cast out and abandoned, he wished they'd do it already; the silence was killing him.

'I can't say I'm happy with this… this relationship,' his father eventually broke the tension, 'especially not…'

'But you're a Master of Light now,' Jo cut him off desperately, 'you can't be hypocritical about this.'

'I'm still a Mistress,' his gaze half narrowed on her, 'and as far as I'm concerned the old First was the one who slept with her own son, not me.'

'You can't make that kind of distinction, you're one and the same. Stop being unreasonable about this.'

'You're the one being unreasonable about this,' Arados became defensive, 'because Dad's right, he's not the same being who would have agreed with you. And I'm not even sure the old First would have, not completely.'

'You can't keep us apart,' Crovell's voice was mute. 'Even if we have to leave and never come back, we will, because we need each other too much.'

'This is wrong,' his mother turned away, 'I can't believe we're having this conversation. We should just send one of them away. Keep them apart that way.'

'You can't do that,' Jo jumped to her feet, 'that's not fair.'

'No, what's not fair is you…' she couldn't even finish her sentence, as she choked back the sickened rage she was clearly feeling.

'You can't keep us apart,' Crovell's voice was firm, 'the one who's left behind will just follow the one who's made to leave and you know it.'

'Yes, but at least we wouldn't be willingly allowing it,' she gritted her teeth, 'because you know I can't willingly allow this.'

'Then just think of us as gods and your conscience about it will be eased.'

'You're not gods,' Ahna shook her head. 'You need to be worshipped in order to be gods. Those were the rules set out a long time ago and the ones beings of your power level must obey. So I can't justify you doing this by thinking of you as gods. You are not gods, therefore I cannot allow you to do this.'

'I don't see how it's your choice,' Jo folded her arms stubbornly, 'if the First says we can, then we can.'

'What makes you think the new First will agree with you,' Arados rolled his eyes.

'How do you know he won't?'

'You're right, I don't. But that doesn't…'

'If he is the First, new or old, then he will agree. He has to.'

'You can only wish,' he shook his head, 'and even if the First agrees, it doesn't mean the rest of us will.'

'But the First is the one that matters.'

'Why?'

'Shouldn't that be obvious, even to you?'

'No one's going to just let you…'

'I believe I already have…'

'SHUT UP JO!'

'Why should I?'

'Because nobody want to hear it Jo,' their father interjected, his voice cool almost to the point of cold. 'Nobody here wants to know about what you and your half brother have been doing together. This matter isn't an easy one and whatever choice I make someone's going to be unhappy with it. So excuse me for not knowing what to do right now.'

'You can't not know,' Jo glared at him. 'You're supposed to know. You're supposed to pick our side. You have to!'

'He doesn't have to do anything Jo, he's not the Mistress you wanted to control,' Crovell sighed and shot his sister a look, 'and getting hysterical about it doesn't do anyone any good,' turning, he made his way towards the door. 'Maybe I should save everybody a lot of hassle and just leave again.'

'C, don't,' Jo desperately caught hold of his arm. 'You can't do this to me. Not again.'

'I've done it before,' he gave a callous shrug, 'what's to stop me from doing it again?'

'Because I'm your equal now and I won't let you leave me.'

'Then come with me.'

'I can't!'

'Why? Is acceptance really that important to you?'

'I…'

'Jo, what's more important to you, being accepted or being with me?'

'I…'

'Either way Jo, I'm leaving again,' he pulled his arm away from her and left the room. 'If you want to come with me, you know where to find me. If not,' he shrugged, 'goodbye Jo.'


Almost as soon as he was strapping the helmet to his head, something strange appeared to take over Tristan. It was as though he'd realised something he'd half forgotten and Kaiba just wished he knew what it was. Strapping his own helmet on, he followed Tristan down the driveway to where his bike was parked. Legally Kaiba was blind, so legally he couldn't ride a bike of his own. He had no choice but to be Tristan's passenger; a thought which almost felt strange to him when several hours before he'd been riding a bike on his own in Noah's virtual world.

He got onto the back of the bike behind his lover and wrapped his arms around him. For a moment Tristan placed a hand on Kaiba's and together they took a mutual breath in. Then he took his hand away and readied the bike for their journey. Within seconds they were off and they were soon whizzing along a road which took them straight out of the city. Everything moved past them so fast, Kaiba's already blurred vision was unable to keep up. Feeling more than a little sick, he closed his eyes and just allowed himself to feel the warmth of Tristan's body beneath his. It didn't matter how much the order of things had changed, what matter was the fact they hadn't and that they never would.

After what felt like a blissful eternity Tristan stopped the bike. Together they got off and removed their helmets Kaiba then watched as the mass which was Tristan walked towards the top of a nearby cliff. Without hesitation Kaiba followed suit and was almost amazed to find himself stood at a view he almost recognised. Almost only because he couldn't see it clearly enough to be sure. But something about the feel of the wind on his face and the smell of salty water in the air which was just so familiar to him if he closed his eyes he knew he could see where they were perfectly.

Whilst Kaiba had been getting himself lost in his surroundings, Tristan had taken up a position under a nearby tree. Cautious about walking in semi-unfamiliar surroundings, Kaiba carefully made his way towards him and sat down.

'You're supposed to stand,' his lover's voice was almost too calm.

'That's what I did in the dream,' he rested his head against Tristan's shoulder, 'but this isn't a dream.'

'You promised you'd find a way to fix me.'

'I know, but…'

'I am Win now.'

'I know.'

'I can't afford to keep relying on the Chip. We need to find a more permanent solution or else those who know how will take advantage of us.'

'Those who know how?' Kaiba frowned. 'What do you mean?'

'I can sense something… someone who's been leading me out here. They're close… so close I can almost touch them right now, but…' he shook his head. 'They know we're here right now. They're letting me talk to you. They want you to know they have all the power, because they could control me when I was just Tristan and they can still control me now that I am Win.'

'I don't… I don't understand, how could someone have been controlling you all this time?'

'Because they knew I wouldn't remember it, so I wouldn't be able to fight it.'

'So… so we need to find a more permanent solution. Find a way of fixing your memory so this person can't keep taking control of you like this. Is that what you're saying?' Kaiba stared at him, wishing he could see Tristan's expression more clearly.

'I think it would help, but right now… right now they have all the power, I can feel it.'

'Tristan…'

'You're supposed to stand,' Tristan's voice was almost dull as he cut him off, 'in the dream you always stand.'