Three updates in one month? What is this?
'So, you're telling me that the enemy Spy has been sneaking in here while I was unconscious and you never thought to tell me?'
Spy and Medic exchanged guilty looks. Medic had brought Spy in to help him explain, probably just so he wasn't the only one Sniper was being angry at. It was a testament to how distracted Medic must be that he didn't even criticise Spy for smoking in his medical bay.
Spy sighed around his cigarette. 'We didn't want to concern you.'
'Well I'm feeling pretty damn concerned now that I know everyone was keeping it a secret from me!'
'He didn't do you any harm,' Medic said.
'Well how the hell do you know that?'
'You're not dead,' Spy pointed out.
'But why?' Sniper said in frustration. 'Why has he been coming here if he didn't want to off me? That bastard's not exactly the caring type, you know.'
'We suspect he may feel...responsible in some way,' Medic said.
Sniper snorted. Didn't sound like the BLU Spy he knew. 'What the hell for? He wasn't involved in anyway!'
'Oh,' Spy said. 'We thought you knew.'
'Knew what?'
'That he was the one to kill you.'
Sniper shook his head. 'Wasn't even there. Pretty damn sure he was the only BLU I didn't see that evening.'
'He was there, whether you saw him or not,' Spy insisted. 'He shot you through the head, killing you instantly.'
Sniper shook his head. No, nothing like that had happened. Except...no one ever remembered the last few seconds before they went through respawn. Sniper had assumed that he'd died from shock or something when... 'Their Medic tried to take my eyes out,' Sniper said, looking down at his calloused hands instead of his teammates. He hadn't told anybody that. The memory was too raw, too sickening.
'Yes, I thought something like that must have happened,' Medic admitted. 'Sometimes you'd talk in your sleep about it, telling him not to do it.'
More likely shouted and begged, Sniper suspected.
'So the BLU Spy mercy-killed me?'
'Yes, we think so.'
That was odd and disconcerting in a way. Sniper was glad he hadn't had to live through having his eyeballs gouged out of his skull but why the BLU Spy of all people? Sniper would have thought he'd have wanted a front row seat to something like that. He seemed like the kind of guy who would have brought along his own popcorn, not put Sniper out of his misery. And on top of that, the Spy had been in here at least twice (and probably many more times than that) yet he hadn't stabbed Sniper even once. It was strange. Out of character. Out of place. Sniper didn't know how to deal with a dangerous Spy that was choosing not to be a danger to him anymore. It wasn't how things were meant to go.
'Still, why?' Sniper pressed. 'Why is he coming in here and not knifing me in my sleep? What was he doing when you caught him, Medic?'
'He was just by your bed, looking at you while you slept.'
'Urgh,' Sniper muttered.
'If he was doing anything more I didn't have chance to find out before he ran for it. But when I came back to check up on you, nothing had been disturbed, not even the machinery. What was he doing when he was disguised as me?'
'Nothing really,' Sniper said with a puzzled frown, trying to remember if there was anything significant in the Spy-as-Medic's actions. 'He took something from one of your cupboards though, saying that he'd forgotten something.'
'Which cupboard?' Medic asked quickly.
'Uh, that one, I think,' Sniper said, pointing.
Medic went over and tugged the cupboard door open. 'Let's see, let's see. Ah, I think some codeine's missing.'
'What's that?'
'A painkiller. Not the type I'd go handing out for a bump or scrape but not the especially powerful stuff either. I don't think he could have come in here looking for anything specific or he'd probably have taken one of the really strong ones in here. What else did he do?'
'Just talked, really.'
'Said something about your painting?'
'Yeah. Didn't like the colours. Just being a bastard to wind me up though, nothing important.' He left out the bit about Spy calling his use of all the colours 'queer' because he knew he wouldn't be able to look in Spy's direction for a while if he did.
'So he came in here disguised as me just to insult you?' Medic asked.
'Looks like it. I still don't get it.'
'I have a theory,' Spy said.
'Yeah?' Sniper was glad someone did because he didn't have a clue.
'Remember what I told you, Sniper, about the BLU's crippling fear of permanence?'
Medic raised an eyebrow. Clearly this was news to him.
'Yeah?'
'I think it's linked to that. It's clear to everyone that he enjoys...harassing you most out of all of us. It's like a game for him. Harmless because the harm he does never sticks.'
'He still pressure-pointed me,' Sniper pointed out.
'Yes, but he has complete control over that. He's the only person who can use it against you. Then Saturday evening happens, he arrives in that alleyway to find you bruised and bloody.'
If only it had just been that.
'This is something he has no control over at all. His team don't think much of him what I've seen; if he told them to stop, they wouldn't have. Especially if it was their Medic. So you go in one moment from being his little plaything he has complete control over—'
'I'm not his "plaything!" And that asshole's got no control over me.'
'What is real and what is real in the BLU Spy's head are two very different things,' Spy explained. 'This is all from his point of view, or as close as I can get.
'So, as I was saying. He's suddenly lost control. He takes it back in the only way he can, by shooting you dead. Maybe he does it partly out of the kindness of his own heart but I'd be surprised if he even has one. Then, you're stuck in respawn. You don't turn up for the next match. Suddenly he's faced with permanence again except this time it might be his fault, because he's the one who actually killed you. I highly doubt he would ever actually put the blame on himself; it's in his nature to place it everywhere but on his own doorstop, but I suspect that subconsciously there will have been something there. Maybe guilt, maybe worry, maybe something else entirely. But something all the same. So he has to come and see you. He has to come and make sure his actions haven't led to any permanent damage. That's why I think he's been in here but done no real harm, because he's checking that no real harm has come to you.'
'Okay,' Sniper said, though the explanation didn't entirely make sense to him. Maybe it was because he was tired. He was always tired these days.
Spy's talk about permanence had Sniper thinking about it. Medic had said it was still hard to say exactly what damage there was that wouldn't heal up entirely. A couple of obvious ones though. Sniper had used to have noticeable sharp canines, now the one on the left was notably chipped. Just what Sniper needed, another thing to make his face look even more asymmetrical. He didn't know if it was a good or bad thing that it was on the opposite side to his scar.
The other thing was a faint collection of scars that had healed up as much as they were going to on his right arm from where he got nasty gravel burns during the attack. He was pretty sure there were actually still a couple of bits of gravel embedded under his skin.
'Do you think he'll go back to normal once I'm back on the field?' Sniper asked. He couldn't work out if he would be glad of it or not. The Spy's current behaviour was incredibly creepy but Sniper's encounters with him before then had all been so painful...
'Hmm, I'm afraid I can't say for sure but I suspect he might once he sees you're fit and healthy again.'
'I wish he'd just fuck off.'
'So do I,' Medic agreed.
'Rest assured, I will be having words with the Administrator about him coming here next time I speak to her,' Spy said.
When the two of them left, Sniper couldn't decide if he felt more or less reassured about the whole situation than when they'd arrived. At least he knew what was going on now, even if he was still struggling to understand it. What was that Spy's obsession with him? Sniper had never asked for it. He'd never wanted it.
The rest of the day was a boring one. Heavy came to visit him to see how he was getting on with the much-thumbed copy of War and Peace he'd leant Sniper. Sniper had to try and explain without making himself sound like an illiterate idiot that he'd tried but he actually couldn't really read without tinted glasses. He wasn't sure if he succeeded.
Demoman dropped in too but for all his noise and bravado, he had a good eye for spotting when Sniper was tired of company and left him to it after a short while. Sniper often found people exhausting even on a good day, and so far since the attack, he hadn't had any of those. His antisocial behaviour was now also compounded by the fact that anytime someone walked in through the door, they might be the BLU Spy in disguise. That didn't exactly encourage the flow of conversation or make Sniper want to spend much time alone with anyone.
He was tired a lot too and took to napping more than normal. Medic had told him not to worry about it much when he'd brought it up. Sleep was good for healing.
While he slept, Sniper had a dream that he was exploring the forest beyond the base. It was a pleasant dream. In it, he was fine. No tiredness, no fear, no odd moments when his heart thumped hard in his chest for no apparent reason at all. Just Sniper and nature. It was beautiful. Serene.
The sound of an engine in the distance caught his ear. He looked around wildly. How could any vehicle be out here in the middle of a trackless forest? The sound was getting closer. Something heavy weighed down on Sniper's chest. Down and down and down. He spun around.
Where? Where was that sound coming from?
Sniper opened his eyes.
Two eyes stared back at him from on top of his chest, amber coloured with slitted pupils.
'Cat?' Sniper muttered sleepily, the dream already forgotten.
'Ow?' she replied.
Sniper reached up a hand and stroked her absent-mindedly. The cat blinked slowly at him and began to purr even more loudly, the vibrations travelling through Sniper's chest. 'What you doing here he asked? How did you get in?'
'Someone left the door open,' Medic said, disapprovingly. 'Who was the last person in here?'
'Might have been Demo. I've been asleep though so if anyone else has been in, I wouldn't know.' That was the worry. 'Got up to anything interesting today, Medic?'
'No, just the same old, really,' Medic said with a shake of his head.
Sniper stiffened. It was a good thing he wasn't hooked up the the heart monitor anymore or it would have spiked.
That wasn't the right answer. That wasn't the reply he'd expected to receive. Everyone on his team should know by now to reply with, 'Oh, just a bit of this and that.'
Which meant that the Medic frowning at him right now wasn't the Medic at all.
'Are you all right, Sniper?' he asked, clearly noticing Sniper's reaction.
'Ah, yeah. Cat just dug one of her claws in, that's all.'
'Horrible thing. Here, let me get rid of the fleabag.'
'No! No. She's fine, really. It was just an accident.' Sniper didn't want the Spy any closer and he definitely didn't want him to get his hands on either himself or the cat. Besides, the cat somehow felt like a barrier. Something he could keep between them.
Sniper attempted to pull himself up into a sitting position. He felt too vulnerable flat on his back with the man who must be the BLU Spy alone in the room with him.
'Ow.'
'Sorry,' Sniper muttered to the cat as he dislodged her from his chest and resettled her on his lap. As soon as he was done fidgeting and was sat up straight, the cat curled back up again as though she'd never been disturbed.
'She's probably covered in fleas,' Spy-as-Medic complained.
'Oh yeah, probably,' Sniper said. 'That must be why I've been scratching.' He wanted to put the Spy off coming any closer. It didn't work. The Spy sidled up to his bedside, Sniper frantically trying to come up with a way to get rid of him. They hadn't planned this far ahead. Demoman had joked about getting Engineer to install a panic button but no actual procedure had been set in place as to what to do if the Spy actually made an appearance.
'What yah doing?' Sniper asked as the Spy reached for his arm, trying his best not to flinch away. He wished he still had his hat and glasses to help hide his face. He felt far too exposed without them.
'Checking your pulse,' the Spy said, pulling down his sleeve.
'What for?'
'Any abnormalities.' Bullshit.
'With your gloves on still?'
'I can still feel your pulse with them on.' More bullshit.
'With your thumb?'
'Ah, silly me! I'd forget my head if it wasn't screwed on!' It had a few screws loose if you asked Sniper.
He snatched his arm back as soon as he got the chance. He returned to stroking the cat as though not at all bothered to have the Spy-as-Medic in the room with him.
Sniper's back itched. Right between the shoulder blades. At least in his current position his back was out of reach. If he tried to get up, that would no longer be the case.
What could he do? What could he do?
Calling the Spy out on it was no good. At least while pretending to be Medic he had to act civil. If Sniper gave away he knew, all bets would be off and he had no idea how the Spy might react. It was unlikely that he would admit defeat and retire with grace. Sniper was sure that things couldn't possibly end well for him if he gave the game away.
He wasn't in a fit state to defend himself. He knew it and so did the Spy. Sniper cast about for something to use as a weapon, just in case. Nothing, not unless he smashed the canvas over the Spy's head like something out of a cartoon sketch. Why couldn't the RED Medic be more like his BLU equivalent probably was and have scalpels lying about the place?
'There's something I've been meaning to talk to you about, Sniper.'
'Yeah?' Sniper said, trying to sound more curious than wary but probably failing.
'Well, you know the BLU Spy?'
Sniper's eyes flickered from the cat to the Spy and back again. 'Yeah?' he said, more wary than ever.
'I've been thinking about that BLU and it's occurred to me that in an odd way, you kind of owe him.'
'Oh?' Sniper said flatly. Inside, he was seething. Did the Spy really think this would work? Did he really think there was anything he could say in the guise of a teammate that would make Sniper go, 'Oh, you know what, maybe the BLU bastard who's fucked me over a hundred times just for the fun of it isn't so bad after all'?
'Yes, he is the one who got you out of that awful situation.'
'By shooting me.' Sniper struggled to work out how he should handle this turn of events. Maybe if he was rude about the Spy, the BLU would get the hint and stop pursuing him. But most likely it would just leave the Spy wanting revenge. But Sniper couldn't bring himself to say even one nice word about the guy. Especially when it might encourage him.
'What other way would there have been?'
Sniper shrugged. He didn't know. A way of diverting this conversation finally occurred to him, like sunlight breaking through heavy clouds to shine on him.
'Pity the day ended that way. I was having a great time until then. Met a really nice lady actually.'
'Oh?' Medic said. Sniper hoped there was a touch of jealousy hiding under that polite interest.
'Yes,' Sniper said enthusiastically, scrambling for a way to turn his encounter with the nice, if rather dumpy, middle-aged lady in the art shop into something to make the BLU Spy seethe. He wasn't a very good liar, so the closer he could stick to the truth, the better. 'Ended up hanging out with her for ages talking over coffee. Never expected to bump into anyone I had so much in common with in town, let alone a lady.'
'She single?' the Spy asked, making a show of checking over some dials on the nearest medigun. Sniper shrugged. 'Can't say she ever mentioned a husband. And can't say I'm going to be the one asking next time we meet up.'
'So you're seeing each other again?'
'Oh yes. I promised her I'd bring her an example of my art next time I get chance. That's who I've been doing this canvas for.'
'It's...a pity there's no one around for you closer to home. Town's a distance away.'
'Oh no, not if you're from Australia, mate! Seems like no time at all for me. Besides, it's the nearest bit of civilisation we've got. Where else would I look?'
The Spy made a non-committal noise that could have meant anything, his lips pressed flat together.
'I mean,' Sniper said, forcing a joking edge into his voice, 'the rest of the team are all great blokes and all, but they're not my type!'
Go on then, Sniper thought, tickling the cat under the chin and ignoring the Spy. Go and try and find a way to mention yourself.
'The BLU Spy—'
'Hah!' Sniper barked out a laugh. He looked up at the Spy, eyebrows raised and a cheeky grin fixed in place. 'No, Medic, can't say I'm looking to be "backstabbed"!'
'No!' the Spy snapped, scowling. 'I wasn't talking about that, I was—I was just—'
'Look, Medic, if you've got a thing for French frogs, I promise I won't say anything! I'll judge, oh I'll judge, but I won't say a word to Spy!'
'No,' the Spy insisted again. 'I was just moving our conversation back to—'
'Ouch!' Sniper interrupted. 'The cat's kneading me. No, girl, that is not the kind of place I want your claws digging in.' The kneading was real, but not the pain or location. Sniper made a fuss of rearranging the cat.
'I told you I could get rid of it for you,' the Spy said, leaving the medigun alone and stepping up beside his bed again.
'Well I don't want you to,' Sniper insisted, putting his hands over the cat protectively.
'Ow,' she agreed.
Irritation passed across Spy-as-Medic's face, clear enough for even Sniper to catch it. It made him feel rather smug. This conversation clearly hadn't gone the way the Spy wanted it to.
The extra time messing around with the cat had given Sniper enough time to think of a possible way to get rid of the Spy.
'Hey, uh, did Heavy managed to find you in the end?'
'Heavy? Oh. Yes, he did.'
'Oh, good! He said he'd head back in here after he'd had a word with you to talk about his book,' Sniper said, pointing a thumb at the copy of War and Peace on the bedside table.
'Oh. Well. That's good. Good because you'll have some company.'
'Why, do you have to go?'
'Ah, yes. Sorry. I'll see you later, Sniper.'
'See yah, Medic!' He waved as the Spy hurried out the door. As soon as he was out of sight, Sniper let his hand drop and let out a sigh of relief. His heart was pounding in his chest, slight tremors running through his arms that he'd tried to hide by stroking the cat.
'One to me,' Sniper muttered under his breath, a slight smile spreading across his face. It was just a pity the Spy didn't know that he'd lost.
Spy cloaked as soon as he was out of sight and crept out of the base, fuming.
That man. That damn man.
His—the Sniper hadn't acted right at all. The Spy had thought that if only they had some proper time to talk, he might have a chance of creating a connection. Not between Medic and Sniper, no, that wouldn't do. But by planting the right suggestions in the Sniper's head, he was sure he could have planted the seeds he needed to bring everything to fruition at a later date.
Instead his Sniper had mocked him. His Sniper had laughed at the idea of anyone liking him. The Spy slunk off with his tail between his legs back to his base, embarrassed and hurt.
This wouldn't be the end of them though. He wouldn't let it be.
Check out my foeyayfanart blog for even more awesome art by Leoleoteterev!
