Chapter 52 - I'll be home for Christmas

Disclaimer: the characters and all recognisable situations belong to Stephenie Meyer - this is a work of fan fiction, except for the legends and histories of the Quileute that, of course, belong to them. I pay my respects to their gods.

Thanks to BanSidhe [ruadh sidhe] and Feebes86 for betaing and pre-reading.


The wolf imprints were like perfect matches. Leah hated it. The way people who had never taken much notice of each other before, were suddenly soul mates like Jared and Kim. It creeped her out.

But she was tired. So tired. Tired of all the training - although she had to admit, being physically tired was a different kind of tired to being emotionally tired. Embry made her feel guilty and sad.

Billy was at their place all the time. And when he wasn't there, they were in strategy meetings or talks or just sitting around the hall eating. They often sat near each other. Each got that imprint reboot from being near each other and the occasional brush of limbs.

She had also noticed a weird shift in pack behavior. She was the pack female for Jake's pack and the imprint of the alpha of the Forties pack. Plus, he was the tribal chief. It gave her increased pack status.

In a rare moment, she and Seth were lying on the new second-hand lounge. Replaced, again, after a wolf phase had torn it apart. They were watching TV if you could call staring at the screen with eyes half closed, actual watching. What was this program anyway? Fishing? For fuck's sake, as if fishing wasn't a big enough part of their lives? They had to watch it on television?

"How are you doing?" Seth asked. He didn't look at her when he asked; he knew better than that.

"With?" she checked, also still staring at the TV screen.

"Billy."

She wanted to tell him to shut up, but it was Seth; they had always been able to talk to each other. And part of her wanted to talk to someone. She would have fought demons for Seth and she knew he would do the same for her. "It's tricky. We are… feeling our way."

"Yeah… me and Alex, too."

Something just loosened inside her. "I can't stand it, Seth."

"What do you mean?"

"Poor Sam."

Seth was dumbfounded. "You feel sorry for Sam? Like… let me get this right… Sam Uley, Sam?"

Leah sighed. "I know it sounds like I have been eating Old Quil's mushrooms, but I had no clue how strong an imprint was … or is, or whatever."

"Until you are actually IN one." Seth knew now, too.

"He'd already dumped me, because he'd become a wolf and he didn't know how to tell me that—"

"Or wasn't allowed to."

"Shit. Yeah… but then Emily came over to commiserate with me. Remember?"

"Yep. And she told Sam off—"

"And whammo."

"He… kind of tried to say no to Emily."

"No. Emily said no to him. She told him that he was behaving like Josh by dumping me and trying to take up with her."

"She had no idea what kind of can of worms she opened with that one."

"No, she didn't and look how well that turned out."

"Yeah… Sam phased too close and she is permanently scarred." He paused. "I don't think Josh knows that story."

"Crap. I'm not going to tell him. He likes Emily."

"Imagine finding out that he is kind of involved in her scarring."

"He'd blame himself."

"Josh is a cool guy, now."

"Sam is still avoiding him, too."

"Josh? How do you know that?"

"Billy said it."

"Right." Seth skipped up a few channels but the options were no better and he went back to the fishing channel. "Ah… is Billy saying no, like Emily?"

She gave him a look.

He held his hands up. "Just asking."

Silence for a beat.

Leah sighed. "We can all crap on about the will of the gods 'n all… but—" She stopped talking.

"But?" Seth prompted. Always game to push his sister further than anyone else.

"But it feels right. He gave me a hug in the hall, that first night the Cullens arrived. You probably don't remember."

Seth almost blushed. "I was a bit .. .distracted."

"Fuck. That's right. You nearly got in a fight with Paul."

"I know what you mean," said Seth, deftly changing the subject. "Alex is the same for me. And I know she's still a bit of a mess right now, we aren't even having sex because she gets all locked up about it, but just being close to her is good and we make out a bit. It's enough, so I know what you mean about the hugs. They both sleep with me now; we just pile in together and it's awesome! And it felt good right from the start."

Leah wasn't sleeping with Billy, Seth knew that. She wondered if he had brought that up for a reason. "She'll get there."

"I know. I'm happy to wait for her." He paused. "You've been seeing a lot of Billy lately," Seth said.

"He comes over here because Rachel has shifted to being shitty with him, rather than with Paul."

"Lucky Paul. No wonder Billy is around, then." Seth shifted on the lounge; stretching his neck. "Rachel needs to be told."

"Yeah… she does. But I don't reckon Billy will do it. She's still his daughter-"

"And he feels guilty."

"He gets this puppy dog look on his face when he's guilty."

Seth frowned. "That I cannot imagine." He noticed Leah's smile and poked her in the side. "Next you will say he looks dreamy like Lucas does all the time."

"God… Lucas is soooo happy now he and Brady are officially together."

"And he's been good for Brady too you know? He seems … I dunno… stronger?"

"Nah. He's more sure of himself. He's just got more confidence from being the center of Lucas' world."

"He's not the bottom of the pecking order." Seth eyed her off. "And you're the center of Billy's world."

She snorted. "That makes Rachel pissier, believe me." She stood suddenly. "Ha! I might go over there and jump his bones loudly just to piss her off."

"Atta girl, sis." He wasn't sure if she really meant it or not, but if she felt the imprint pull she probably wanted to be near him, as well. Especially when she was emotional and upset.

"Don't call me sis, bro," she growled at him as she headed out.

"You're fine," he said to the air she left behind.


She let herself into the Black house. Since Billy had got back the use of his legs, he tended to not do anything sedentary; no more sitting watching sports on TV. Jake was probably out with Angela. Billy wasn't around but she knew he was close.

She sniffed the air and headed for the back yard. He might be in Jake's garage. She found him tinkering with some engine parts. His face lit up and then shut down again quickly. It made her hurt.

"I didn't know you were a mechanic," she said.

"When you are a fisherman, you're everything."

"Don't want to be stuck out at sea with a non-working engine."

"Exactly."

She watched him for a minute. "So Jake inherited the mechanic gene?"

"Yes, he did but he's better with cars than I am." He threw the part down. "I don't even know what I'm doing."

"I know." She jumped up to sit on the tool bench.

"Yeah?" he challenged her.

"Not sitting down."

He laughed. "That's true."

"And you're messing about in Jake's space."

"Pfft. It was my space first." He gave her a look. "And what are you doing?"

"Just came over to-" She stopped.

He sidled closer to her and bumped her leg with his hip. "Hmmm?"

She heard a car. "That's Rachel's car," she said without answering him.

He didn't move away.

She ran the back of her fingers down the outside of his upper arm. He had put on some muscle, too and his arms looked even bigger. He watched her do it.

"Do you feel that?" she whispered.

"Yes. It almost tingles. I feel better being near you and I am glad you came over."

"Seth said that was why you kept visiting our place."

"And to see my friends."

"And you like the walk."

"Yes."

"You don't have to walk home," she said quietly.

He looked uncertain of what she meant.

"Next time," she added. "You could stay."

"You're sure?"

"Yes." She reached up to hold his chin. She closed her eyes and kissed him; just a peck on the lips.

"Leah, we don't have to-"

She cut him off with another kiss.


She had greasy hand prints on her body when she went inside, and she didn't even try to hide them.

Rachel noticed. She also noticed Leah walk past her and into Billy's bedroom.

Billy followed her to the house after he had tidied up a little and scrubbed his hands. He was aware that it was Jake's space and he was trying to put off a confrontation with Rachel. He got one anyway. He had hoped that she would just leave before he got back to the house; but, no such luck.

"She's my age," Rachel accused.

He didn't argue with her. "I know."

"She's waiting for you."

He glanced in the direction of his room. "I know that, too."

Rachel stood. "I'm going to Paul's."

"Maybe that would be for the best."

Leah was lying on his bed with her arm over her eyes. "She's being a bitch. She knows what imprints are like and she can't even scrape up an ounce of sympathy for either of us. She plays the imprint card often enough at Paul."

"She thinks she's being loyal to her mother."

"Now? That's rich. Bella was right when she said neither twin cared before."

"Leah…" he warned.

"Yeah. I'll shut up."

He stood there uncertainly. He had got rid of the sick bed as soon as he could, but he had never quite expected to see Leah lying on the replacement. "Maybe we…"

She sat up, grabbed his arm and tugged him towards her.

"I'm not sure I can do anything," he said.

"Pardon?"

"The diabetes."

She looked up at him as if she thought he was joking, then saw his face. "That's okay… we can just sleep or hug or something. I don't care about sex, but … I give up, Billy."

He watched her silently.

"I can't fight it off, anymore… I look at Seth and Lucas and Mom and…" She put her arm back over her eyes and threw herself back onto the bed. "And they are all happy… you know?" She said it as if happiness was an alien emotion for her.

He could tell how upset she was and he couldn't resist comforting her. He brushed her leg with his hand.

"And I just need some skin to skin contact," she added.

"I understand."

"But I'll get grease on your sheets," she said tugging the stained shirt over her head and throwing it on the floor.

Turned out that he couldn't resist touching her, either. He didn't fight her off at all. She coaxed him into action with gentle hands and encouraging whispers. When he sank into her body she wrapped her legs around him and she could feel the moisture on her neck as the tears ran down his cheeks.

She held him as hard as she could. "Oh, god, Billy… don't cry." She was so glad Rachel wasn't there to hear it.

"Sorry… I just…"

"You never thought this would happen again?"

"No."

Silence.

"Talk to me, Billy."

"This feels… so ominous."

"That's what every girl wants to hear."

"That wasn't what I meant."

"No, I know… it's because we have a day set."

"I'm worried, Leah."

She knew that confession was just for her. A measure of his faith and belief in her as his imprint. "We are staking everything on this battle… everything. If Josh is right and they are all coming."

"He's right. I feel it in my bones."

"Me, too."

He rolled over onto his back and took her with him. She snuggled down and put her face on his shoulder. His arms wrapped around her.

"Thank you," he whispered to her.

"It's my-"

"You say duty and you will be in trouble," he warned.

She chuckled. "Fair enough and I was going to say pleasure."

"No, it really wasn't. I may be old, but I'm not ignorant. You didn't get much out of that."

"Out of practice."

They lay there silently. Billy's hands kept up a pattern of constant touch across her skin.

"Do you think imprints change people?" she asked him.

He was silent, but she knew he was thinking about his answer.

After a while he said, "Hey, you know that special place you go to to think? That one you told me about?"

"Yeah."

"Can you show me where it is?"

"No! It's mine. Go get your own."

He laughed. "There!" he said as if he had proved something.

"What?" she was ready to be offended.

"The imprint hasn't changed you. Still as prickly and private as ever."

"Ha! I'll keep you on your toes."

"Maybe that's the point."


After their first time, Leah's pleasure took precedence for Billy. There was no such thing as a quickie with him, she had to come several times before he would let her guide him inside her. And he was strong enough to fight her over it, too. She didn't really mind.