Interlude VII
Severus had only been at Hogwarts for a month and, already, he was beginning to think he was mistake in his perception of the school. It was supposed to be his haven, his escape from the horrors he experienced when he was at home. Instead, he found himself cutting himself off from would-be friends in an effort to hide his blood status, futilely trying to defend his friendship with 'that mudblood Gryffindor' (as they called her) and hiding out from the insufferable group of Gryffindors who just wouldn't seem to leave him alone.
He kept rationalizing in his mind; his father was miles away, he could finally practice magic legally (when in class) and Lily Evans was here.
Of course, their idea that the whole experience would be like a year-long sleepover had been nipped in the bud the minute he had sat under the Sorting Hat. Well, to be honest it was really when she had sat under the hat. After all, she was the variable really – he had always expected to be sorted into Slytherin. He just assumed Lily would end up there too.
But, considering his housemates and the conversations that had been taking place in the common room over the past few weeks, he supposed it was better that she hadn't been. His brother had warned him, indicated the prejudices that muggleborns and half-bloods would face in the Wizarding World. But, to be honest, he hadn't expected it to be as bad as this. He had attempted to shield Lily from it; he didn't breathe a word to her about the horrible things people in his house had been saying about her and the trouble he was in for even associating with her.
So far he thought he had been successful.
Severus glanced up from his spot beneath the tree that overlooked the lake, where he had been reading for the past hour or so. He saw Lily heading towards him and frowned when he noticed her eyes were red, and that she was rubbing at them furiously. Severus closed the book he was holding and dropped it on the grass as she plopped down beside him.
"What's wrong?" he asked in concern.
He noticed her eyes well up again at the question, before she swallowed and spoke quietly, "I…I thought you said it didn't matter being muggle born?"
Severus felt a jolt at the accusing question. Her eyes were accusing but sad, looking at him as if he had all the answers. She always looked at him that way; expecting him to explain every little thing she didn't understand. He offered the only response he could;
"It doesn't."
She hit his arm, her eyes flashing angry, "Liar!"
"Look, it doesn't, okay," he turned fully to face her, "We're just as good as anyone else here."
"You're new friends don't seem to think so," she said quietly, glancing in the direction of the school. Severus followed her gaze and saw Mulciber, Avery and Rosier watching them nearby. He swallowed, aware that he was in for an unpleasant evening in the common room, unless by some miracle Lucius Malfoy escaped Head Boy duty.
Forcing the thought to the back of his mind, he looked back at his friend. He shook his head, "They're not my friends."
Lily was quiet, keeping her eyes on the grass. She tugged at individual bits, pulling them free from the ground. She spoke so quietly he could barely hear her, "You will be though. It's not like you have a choice; stuck in the same house as them."
Severus shrugged, "I don't need any more friends."
"You're friends with Lucius Malfoy."
"Not really," Severus denied the statement, "He's just nice to me."
"Why?"
"I don't know."
A silence fell over them. Severus hated it; it seemed that by coming to Hogwarts the whole dynamic of their friendship had changed. It wasn't as fun anymore; they didn't joke around like they used to; didn't play and tickle and hold hands the way they did at home. They didn't tell each other secrets. Instead, he was keeping secrets from her.
"Do you know what they call me?" Lily tugged a daisy from the grass.
Severus didn't answer her, though he knew well enough what the answer was.
"Mudblood," she said. It sounded awful on her lips, something he never wanted to hear escape her again. He didn't even want her to know that word.
"You know what it means?" she raised her eyes to his. He nodded, slowly. "I thought so," she whispered, looking down.
A moment later, her voice was accusing, "You could have told me, you know. You could have warned me."
"Only some people think it. I don't; that's why I didn't say anything. I don't even think about it."
"You're lying," she shook her head.
He looked down.
"They hurt me sometimes."
Severus' head snapped up at that. He felt a sudden, unexpected fury course through him, "Who hurts you?"
She nodded in the direction of the school, where he knew the Slytherin's he had seen before would still be standing, watching them. He glared over at them, his eyes dark.
"They knocked me down in the hallway yesterday," she lifted her arm and revealed an ugly blue and purple bruise on her lower arm.
Severus stared at it in horror, almost unable to comprehend the idea that someone would want to hurt this girl in front him. He reached out and touched the bruise; she quickly drew her arm back and swatted his hand with a playful glare;
"Careful, it still hurts."
He swallowed, his eyes remaining on her arm, though he could no longer see the mark that had given her. He looked at her, his eyes determined, "They won't bother you again."
She shrugged, "You can't stop them."
"Yes I can," he said, firmly, "They won't bother you anymore."
She looked at him, her eyes skeptical at first but, when he offered her a reassuring smile, her features brightened and she offered him a smile of her own. She turned and scooted closer into him and leaned against him. He tensed slightly, glancing in the direction of his housemates.
"Have you been swimming in the lake yet?" she asked, lifting the book he was reading. She scrunched up her nose at the title, Essential Dark Arts, and then looked up at him with a smile. He smiled back and relaxed, deciding that, for now, he would just enjoy his time with her; he'd deal with the consequences later.
He shook his head, "No. I don't think we're allowed to."
She grinned and shrugged, handing the book back to him, "Then we'll have to do it secretly," she rubbed her eyes again, which were beginning to look the way they should – bright, hopeful, "It looks nicer than the one at home, doesn't it?"
He nodded. She smiled at him, before she looked over in the direction of Mulciber and his friends. They were no longer looking at the two of them; "Will you really keep them away from me, Sev?"
He nodded again, "I won't let them hurt you," he replied with sure determination. He would keep her safe from all this. If there was one thing he was sure he would do, it would be to keep her safe from the prejudices of his house.
He felt Lily lean in closer against him and her hand slip into his. A moment later he felt her squeeze his tightly and he was filled with certainty; they were going to be just fine.
